(Fade into a cold snowy Boston in front of the Old North Church. Steve Johnson stands in front of the church wearing a heavy black North Face Jacket, blue jeans, and a black WFW skull cap with the letters in red. He is wearing gloves as he stands holding the railing in front of the church. His cheeks are slightly red as if he has been there awhile. )
Boston isn´t only home to the Bruins, Red Sox and Celtics, but it is also the birthplace of this great country. Here where so many patriots were willing to risk it all to make grand changes in their lives. Men like Sam Adams , John Hancock, John Adams, and Paul Revere all rode from this great state to free themselves from years of hardship.
Jared do you grasp the importance of this? Do you understand that while you are our pursing your orgies at some prom after party, no doubt creating some criminal history, that men sometimes passed those pleasures up to make history. You have had an oppurtunity as champion for the past year to take your title and make the world a better place, and instead you squandered that oppurtunity for “Fast Times at Ridgemont High.”
While you are out spreading your seed, you could have gone into your hometown of Baltimore and taken your fame to plant some seeds for betterment. The great Boston Patriots, and no, I dont mean the 85 team that got waxed by the Bears, but guys like Sam Adams who took their fame and tried freeing the country from great harm at the expense of their own lives. For you it could have occured during one of your beer run breaks. You sully this sport and all the community that pays to watch us.
Do you know why this Old North Church is important? Jared while you were busy peddling pot in grade school, did you ever take the time to learn while this was important? Jared, this is where Paul Revere started his ride to notify the rest of his brethern that the British were coming. See at that time, the Brits were coming with muskets to continue their reign of terror. Jared it took our forefathers 150 years to realize that their oppresors were wrong, for me, it only took one match to understand that what you stand for and represent in this federation is oppressive to anyone who stands within 10 feet of you.
That oppression is what spurred Paul Revere to ride well into the night. The signal that was sent to him, notifying him that it was time to ride, were two lanterns. See you could lot a learn from this, so I look at one of my beacons, as your old nemisis Jean Rabesque. Your battles are legendary, and while we train for the tag straps, which you didn’t have the balls to continue fighting for, he has also showed me ways to beat you. From his lessons, I hope to make you quit in this match, with a modified form of his figure four, called the Hardcore Figure Four. This will be the first you hear of it, I gurantee the next you hear of it, will be when I snap your knee. Though he won’t be fighting with me, his lessons provide me insight. Because while you screw and drink, I train and watch tape, and there is no better player in the game in that regard than Jean.
As for my second beacon, lets just say that we may not philosophically agree on much, except that he may dislike you more than I. When I train with him, he teaches me how he beat you so many times before. See he appreciates my desire to end your reign of terror, so in the world of revolutionary politics, he might as well be 1770s France. He will come down with me to ring side on that chilly night and make sure not only that I beat you, but that I BREAK YOU!.
Jared I still don’t only want to beat you, I want to make you quit, I want you have a broken spirt as well as leave without a title on that Cold January night. So my offer still stands, a hardcore I quit match, where the only way the match ends is with you tapping out after I find some creative way to stretch one of your already atrophyihng limbs. So Jared after I beat you with all those chairs, frying pans, and whatever other instrument of destruction you have had to use to beat guys like Thirteen or whatever other member of the Job Squad, I want to beat you on my terms. Pinning you won’t be enought, because any one can with a fluke pin, after all that is how you beat me. Only after you have tapped out though, will my win be undisputed.
I aim to make history Jared, and while you spend time laughing at what I say, remember that every time you laugh and chug a beer, I am doing curls and watching tape. Boston was home of the revolution, and at Super Bowl your reign of dominance will come to an end as an unexpected upstart takes not only what you hold most valuable, but also your dignity.
(Fade out as the camera pans to the two lanterns that go on and Steve Johnson walking into the dark night. )