WWR: Wednesday Wrestling Rag 'Completely Deranged' Supershow Sunday night.
WWR COMPLETELY DERANGED AUGUST 23rd, 2009
Live at Anderson Arena on the campus of Bowling Green State University in Bowling Green, Ohio
PCW Tag Team Title Match: ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido and Starz N. Stripes (c) vs. Jack Schett and Bull Schett with Horst Schett and the Extreme German Schnauzer Hans Gruber
DWF Young Guns Plus One Elimination match T-Money vs. Cody Brews vs. Travis Williams vs. Doozer
MVW Tag Team Title Match Angels of Death-Angel Scott and Angel Casey (c) vs. The Vatican Vice Squad- Sister Mary Marlboro and Sister Sandy Scarboro with Mother Superior Sister Susan
PCW Title Match O’Beck Bahama (c) w/Justin Sufferable vs. Khalid-El w/the Axis of Evil vs. Hollywood A-Lister Stone Chism w/the Skanky Rich Bimbos vs. The Right Reverend Randy Richardson w/the God Squad
DWF 3 Way match Owen Manton vs. Pierce vs. Jak Nemesis
PCW-MVW Title Unification Match PCW Women’s Champion Kathryn Randall Collins vs. Missouri Valley Wrestling Champion Miss USA
DWF Intergender Death Match Dawn McGill vs Mike Polowy
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The war of words between DWF’s Mike Polowy and Dawn McGill has begun. With the injury to the Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl Tessa Martin, this match has taken on a new intensity and emotions are riding high.
Mike Polowy on 8/18:
Mom’s and dads, now might be a great time to tell little Billy to piss off for awhile.
Why? Because I’m not exactly going to be weaving a touching family tale here for the next several pages. For those of you teen and tweenagers out in blogland who’s parents are too busy doing anything but being parents right now, I want you to remember some of the words you see inside here today, and be sure to use them whenever possible.
Alright, this is fucking bullshit.
I mean, I get it. Tessa Martin might not be able to have babies anymore, boo hoo, I heard the whole fucking story enough times in the last two days to make me wanna vomit harder than a cheerleader with a cute face but fat thighs (PS, kids, bulimia is a GREAT way to lose weight. Write that down!). And everyone keeps looking down at me over their pointy little noses, like I’m supposed to feel some kind of guilt over being the guy who put her vag trough into this state of eternal hemorrhaging. What the fuck? Let’s be honest, especially with you men out there… women spend a week out of every month gushing blood out of those cervical slip and slides. Do you really expect me to feel guilty for having the same effect on her that a change of birth control would have? So in case I needed to clarify for all the neo-nazi feminist rug munchers out there who think I should be crying tears over Tessa Martin’s clit-splitting spiral into unconsciousness, no, I feel little to no remorse for what happened on Monday night. In fact, the only thing I feel a little sorry for at this point is that I couldn’t have brought her a comically large tampon after the match with a big red fucking bow on it.
So what’s got my proverbial panties in a bunch, you ask?
It’s quite simple.
I signed a contract on Monday night to compete at WWR’s Completely Deranged this Sunday. I did so knowingly and willingly, and I did so under the pretenses that I would be facing ‘The Extremely Lame Promo Delivery Girl” Tessa Martin. I was fine with that. If she wanted to sign her own death certificate by stepping into the ring with the greatest Women’s Champion in the history of DREAM, that was her decision and to be honest I almost respected it. But today, I take a look at the DREAM website and I see that I’ll be headlining the show (no surprise there) against none other than that Conan The Destroyer With A Cast Iron Tampon manager Dawn McGill she’s been parading around with the last few weeks. What the fuck? I’m sorry, but I’m fairly certain that when one signs a contract, that contract is legally binding. It isn’t my problem that Tessa Martin is currently curled up somewhere in the fetal position, trying to pass the tip of my boot like an unholy kidney stone, the fact of the matter is that she is contractually obligated to appear in the ring with me on Sunday night. I agreed to wrestle her, but I don’t seem to remember signing up to climb Mount Estrogen and face Janet Reno’s personal goddamn trainer.
This is a great example of why the Dream Wrestling Federation continues to shove its own head further into it’s own corporate ass.
Don’t color me coward, folks. Don’t get me wrong… I would have zero problem tickling McGill-Ah Gorilla’s unholiest of holes with my size eleven’s if the situation were different. This isn’t a matter of fear, intimidation, or discrimination against people with both male and female genitalia. This is a strict matter of principle, and I am by no means obligated to step into the ring this Sunday with Dawn McGill. I mean, if I were to cave in and let this little match take place this week, then what next? They could decide to drop my salary. They could fire me altogether. By wrestling this match, I would be consenting quietly to having the rights of all DWF’s top stars walked on despite tedious hours of contractual negotiation. I’m not doing this for me, ladies and gentlemen…
I’m doing it for America.
I’m doing it for capitalism. I’m doing it for democracy. I’m doing it to defend the rights that soldiers overseas are fighting so hard to protect as I write this. And so I ask the corporation that holds my contract right now… I ask the fans who will undoubtedly agree with me… and most of all, I ask the Jolly Pink Giant Dawn McGill herself… where is your patriotism? Where is your love for the great country of America? I love the stars and stripes too much to step into the ring against my contractual obligation this week, and I suggest that you see things my way. The Dream Wrestling Federation and Dawn McGill have twenty four hours to force Tessa Martin to compete this Sunday night, or else coerce her into doing the right thing and declaring me the winner by forfeit. Her blood may be on my hands, but I will not allow it to stain the dignity of the law. The match will be changed back. If not?
Then I’ll see your asses in court.
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McGill’s response the next day:
I stopped by the hospital in Tallahassee this morning and checked on Tessa. She’s doing much better. Her face has color again, thank goodness. It looks like they’re going to keep her for a couple more days to make sure everything’s healing correctly and she’s ready to travel and then they’ll send her home.
From the doctor says, she won’t be back in the ring for at least two, probably three weeks. So Mike Polowy, wherever you’re hiding, she’s not going to be there Sunday night at the WWR Show. But I will.
You can complain all you want to. But Mike, the die’s been cast. The wheels set in motion. And there’s no stopping it now. Mike, you created this situation…you created the spectacle…I will be the one who finishes it. You are the moth…and I am the flame that you can’t avoid. You have no idea what you’re up against. But come Sunday night, you will.
Bring your little friends with you. I’m sure Level One and Jak Nemesis will want a ringside seat for this. I’m bringing some friends along too.
‘The Hellcat’ Kirsta Lewis. You may have heard of her. If not, ask Scottywood who was crazy enough to shoot him in the knees with a nail gun during a match.
Then there’s Valora Salinas- Wrestling Midwest’s Hardcore champion. Ask Adam Pyre about how she destroyed him at Hardcore Hell. Ask him how she Border Tossed him off the top of a cage and then moonsaulted on top of him.
Mike, Tessa Martin may be extreme…but these ladies are hardcore…and so am I. There will be no backing down, no quarter, or no surrender Sunday night.
Mike, I know why you’re trying to get out of this. I saw the fear in your eyes last night. I sense the internal battle that’s going on inside of you as we speak. But it’s too late.
You started this. And I’m going to finish it.
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Wednesday night at the PCW on P-SPAN special:
Wednesday fans saw Mike Polowy run in and put Dawn McGill through a table during PCW on P-SPAN. This was the latest attack of Women's Champion, Mike Polowy, in his quest to not only retain the Womens Championship, but make a big statement.
McGill will replace an injured Tessa Martin to face Mike Polowy at WWR’s Completely De-ranged event this weekend.
Link:
http://ewtorch.com/index.php/e-wrestling/2009/08/21/ppv-reports/torchcenter-extra-wwr-card-set-polowymcgill-war-of-words-begins/
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