3/24/96
That's right, the place where you can hear the stylings of the CSWA's co-commisioner "The Enforcer" Chad Merritt is BACK. So you wanna hear the dirt on "The Kentucky Kid," or on the CSWA VPs, this is the place. Wanna hear the behind the scenes goings-on about the CSWA, you got it right here, baby!.
Current Issue: The Women of the CSWA
The CSWA is blessed with having some of the most gorgeous women of all time to bless the wrestling ring. The first years of the CSWA saw slim pickings, with Miss Guerrero one of the only woman managers. The rest of the years from 1988 to around 1993-94 were sad in the woman department. We had to see the evolution of Hortense and the LOVE Sisters, Wanda and the Tuna, and Sherry No-Wonders: all the women that the FISH FUND was created for. And on another note: for those of you that don't know about the FISH FUND, it's a telethon/foundation set up to give, shall we say, featurely-challenged women operations like butt tucks, face lifts, etc. We were forced to see Hortense, one of the fattest, polka-dotted dress wearing, singers or all time, and her feud against Wanda, the square, slack-jawed, midget of a woman. And then the sad day when Hortense and Wanda made up, became friends, and we saw "Myra," enter the league, one of the fattest, ugliest, wanna-be slutty women of all time.
And let's not leave out Melba and the rest of the Parsons' women. Melba Benedict, sometime wife of Mickey Benedict......I mean, what can you say. Any woman who would marry that has serious problems, even above and beyond the extra 100 pounds she was carrying. And the Parsons' women? Can you say inbred? I mean, for goodness' sakes, these are women who live double lives, part-time cowherders and part-time spies for their family. What's up with that?
But then came the Golden Age. The Glory Days. The days of cards like "Ho, Ho, Hooters! It all began when "Lucy" Melton appeared, the sister of Joey, and wife-to-be of Timmy Windham. But then came the transformation.....Miss Hooters became Teri Melton. Simply amazing. Then came Tatiana, Poison Ivy, Alicia, and so many others. And now, it seems like you can't go to a CSWA card without seeing someone bare it all, or at least come close. And thank the Lord for that!
And not only are they beautiful, but smart. The days of seeing the infantile feuds of women like Hortense and Wanda are over. Now we see Poison Ivy getting into the action, Teri Melton diving into the ring and getting into it with the big boys, costing and/or saving matches. And they take their share of bumps as well. They've found out that when you choose to interfere, then there's a greater chance that you're going to end up getting hit with a fist or a chair, or getting thrown to the floor. Of course, in the cases of both Teri Melton and Poison Ivy, they've both stepped in the ring against men. And in both cases, they came out on top......but where Ivy used her expertise, Teri Melton used, well, a different kind of expertise.
Well, who knows what we'll see in the evolution of women in the CSWA. A Women's division? More women managers? Or could we see a women manager get seriously hurt for the first time? Let's hope not. But until then, let's just enjoy the action they bring to the ring and outside.....as well as the sights.