Catch 22

[TSiegel]

(fadein, Oklahoma City, the locker room.)

Voice: Now, it seems we have ourselves a little bit of a situation, now don't we? I tell the world that if I get pinned, I don't get myself a shot at the presidential belt for six months--yet here I am with another shot at one of the fed's biggest pay-per-view events of the year, Fish Fund.

(Cruise walks thoughtfully into view, dressed in a dark blue shirt, black pants, his hair slicked straight back.)

CC: On one hand, we've got a man who claims that he's earned his rewards, holding something that he never should have gotten yet received under coincidental circumstances. He claims that he's in the straight and narrow, yet somehow attempts to skate himself clean of a match that according to him, would give as much attention to myself as he would anyone else.

Then on the other hand, we have a man who's pretty much similiar to myself in some respects and more or less has been screwed out of plenty opportunities to climb the ladder in the CSWA. It's besides the point that at one point we were tag team champions in another federation league, this is different. That was AAA league. CSWA is the show.

Then at the center of all this is the Presidential Belt, dangling from a fifteen-ish foot high pole, the first to snatch it up, is the winner, and to the winner, the spoils, bragging rights and the belt.

A belt in which time and time again, I've said by all rights and privilages, should have never left my waist.

Three men.

Two opponents, one the angel, in that respect, a friend and former championship tag-team partner, the other the devil, Satan's little bastard, looking to do what he can to stay in everyone's head. One man I can pound into oblivion, and the other, I have to throw away partnership in order to stay ahead.

And One belt.

It's going to be a long night for the three of us gentlemen. I hope you're prepared.

(fade)

 

[TWhitefield]

Bragging Rights? You Have None

You know, Cam, the more I listen to you, the more you remind me of somebody I wrestled a few years back. Somebody who came out every week... when he actually bothered to show up for work... claiming to be above the frey. Somebody beyond reproach. What was he called himself? Oh yeah, the "Sherriff" of that federation.

Ya know what irked him most about me? That sooner or later, I always do exactly what I say. And I do it, by giving people back exactly what they give.

Now, you can come out here and make excuses... and let's be honest, you are... but let's not pretend that you're any different. No, "Mr. Upstanding" didn't have a problem taking a little help from the ref when he offered it, did he? Would you have done the righteous thing and told the ref to start the match over a couple of months ago when my foot was on the rope against Trip? Would you have thought better out of taking a win had you managed to score a pin after any of the numerous times the ref tried to help YOU win last night?

In case you find it difficult to search for an ansewr here, let me give it to ya... it's an unqualified no, you wouldn't. You woulda come out the next night, waving that belt around, talking about your "clean" win just like anybody else. So save the sermon, reverend. I've played the saint, the angel, the arc-angel... hell, I've even played Jesus Christ. And ya know what? One isn't a whole lot different from the others. And neither are you. And what irks YOU most is that I know it.

You were willing to take advantage of any situation to get the win, just like I was. You failed, I didn't. And you can spin it any way you wanna... but that's the way it plays out in the end.

So now, you, I and Stanley get tossed into a match that really isn't suited to any one of us. But, just like before, Cam, it all plays out about the same in the end. You take advantage of situations. And, when that doesn't work, you create your own.

-Adler

 

[TSiegel]

Ever the Opportunist.

Since when did I ever ASK for help from the ref, Adler? Maybe, if you take your chair-shot-tumor-evident-head from out of your backside, you'd remember, that I told you before that match, that I was man enough to beat you straight up.

And that I damn nearly did.

Sure, I took advantage. That's how I advance in this business Adler. I mean, hell, you've been here ten years plus, and I would have at least figured you to know that. But you know, there's a reason the referee helped me the way he did. There's a reason the referee stopped you from grabbing my tights. There's a reason the referee caught you with your feet on the ropes. It's because that's his job and it's what he's paid to 'DO'.

Next thing, you're gonna whine about me not beating you when YOUR foot was on the ropes. Come on, Mr. Magnificent, you're being a MAGNIFICENT CRYBABY. Knock it off.

Just like I told you before, I've never changed my ambition and the way I do things. I told you that before our match a few days ago, and I did what I do best.

I backed it up.

Why didn't I help you out a couple months ago against Sean???

Gee Tom, maybe because that match WASN'T ANY OF MY FREAKIN' CONCERN!!!!!

That in itself Adler, proves exactly my point in what I try to cement in your novacaine-induced mind of yours all along. I win matches, based on how I perform...not on the basis of how I'm helped. Sure, you beat me, you still have my belt around your waist, but at least I know I can wake up in the morning the next day and respect myself, that whatever job I did....it was a job well done.

I'm not claiming to be some 'sheriff' or 'christ savior', not at all. However, due to your recent obvious admissions, I may prove without a shadow of a doubt....


That I'm better than you.

 

[TWhitefield]

RE: Ever the Opportunist.

Ok, just for my own clarrification, it's ok when YOU take advantage of a situation... it's ok when YOU get over on somebody, not through your own means, but through the help of somebody else.. but when somebody else does it, it's a no no.. is that it? Please.

And, since we're clearing things up, no, I never expected you to help me in that match with Stevens. As usual, you missed the point. I said that had it been you in that match instead of him, I doubt you woulda protested a win you clearly didn't deserve. No, you woulda taken the cheap win, just like he did.

But, you are right about one thing, Cam. There WAS a reason why the ref saw me with my foot on the rope. There WAS a reason why he saw me with a handful of tights. It's because I played him the same way I played you. And the amusing part is that you can't even see it.

Now, I imagine you have a problem with that. If so, too bad. As far as I'm concerned, the referee is part of the ring. You don't have a problem using the ropes as a weapon every time you jump off a turn buckle or whip somebody into the ropes. Don't lecture me because I'm smart enough to use the one object in the ring that few others are.

You went into that match wanting to believe that I didn't have what it took to beat you without help. So I let you. You wanted to believe I needed to cheat to win. So I let you. Face it, Cam, you asked me to play a part in that match, and I played it. I gave you everything you asked for in that match... except a win. That, I kept for myself. Without help. Without cheating. No feet on the ropes. No tights. Just your shoulders on the mat.

And how did "Mr. Upstanding, Do The Right Thing, Straight And Narrow" respond to that loss? he grabbed the first foreign object he could find and suckered his opponent from behind. Yet, somehow, I'm the crybaby.

So go on, Cam, you can keep believing what you wanna believe. Keep teling me what I can and can't do. And, while you're doing it, you can keep doing what you truly do best.

You can lose.

-Adler

 

[TSiegel]

RE: Ever the Opportunist.

So candid are you Adler, it's mind-numbing.

No, Adler, since you're so slow at realizing comments and remarks made toward you at your old age, I'll clarify things just for you.

Yes, I take advantage. I take advantage because no one else *WOULD*. Is it my fault that opponents including yourself are too slow and incontinent to take it themselves? I hardly think so. The fact of the matter is, your "expert technical skills"....were just like what Mike Plett is going to be when GUNS is through with him in two weeks--full of holes.

And no, had it been me in that match against Sean, I wouldn't have WANTED OR NEEDED your help. Sure, I would have been a little pissed about the outcome of the match if it was a little on the cheap side, but unlike people in the fed up north, I take what outcome is given, and I DEAL WITH IT.

And again, no, Adler, I went out on a limb and thought that if you would beat me in Oklahoma, you would at least be a man of credibility, and beat me straight up, like Radder. Radder surprised me, i'll admit, I didn't expect him to pull out a package, but he did, and he beat me straight up. That's Admirable.

I never once had a reason after that to see him as abit of a punk. Sure, sometimes, he does kinda seem 'fairy-ish', but I let that go now. The man backed up what he said he would do.

Yes, I know, you said that you'd beat me and I would get pinned, Adlerplex-withstanding, but the difference is that you couldn't do it LEGALLY. You, in your old age and 'fake' Presidential glory....you needed help from the ropes, my tights, anything that would give you an edge outside of your knowledge of skill.

Why did Mr. Straight-and-narrow give you a boo-boo after the match? Simple.

Because you deserved it, complimentries of Cruisin'-For-A-Bruisin' Destruction Company. Don't worry though Tom, you're not the first customer. There's been plenty before you, as I'm sure there'll be more after. It's not like Eddy Love's Wine and Dine service or Powers' Catering service, oh no. Just the lottery working it's magic.

So if you wanna look at it that way Adler, consider that little present you have on your forehead, just rewards for a job well-done. Don't expect for it to come everytime, because no one gets things for free around here.

Just consider it bought and paid for.

Now, if you'll excuse me, all this crap your talking is making me sick, so I'm goin' to take a a number two and relax with a coppy of the times while you sit and ponder what to comeback with.

On second thought...maybe after all this, you might wanna jump in before me. But before you do...

...light a match.

-Cruise

 

[TWhitefield]

RE: Ever the Opportunist.

You know, Cam, I was planning on criticizing your verbal INCOMPETENCE, but given your apparent obsession with bodily functions, it may be a bit misplaced. So, I'll move on.

I'm also not going to waste my time trying to further explain my point about my match with Trip. I keep forgetting your problems concentrating on more than one thing at a time. Kinda like being on your back and kicking out at the same time. You have problems with that too.

As for that limb you seem to want so many pats on the back for climbing out on, it's not that difficult when your backup plan is apparently whining and crying about every little thing that you seemed to have little or no control over.

But, since I gave you an out before the match and said I didn't care about your promises one way or the other, I don't see much point in wasting my time dwelling on that notion that you had no intentions of keeping 'em. Although, that, along with your response after match says far more about YOUR true character than anything I did.

At any rate, since being on the losing end of everything from wrestling to pre-match banter seems to have an adverse effect on your physical sensibilities, we'll just cut to the chase.

I won, you lost. You can spin the hows and whyfors any way you want. But, if you really want to deal with the outcome you're given, then you can deal with that. But, a little advice. If the way you plan on dealing with every disapointment involving me is the same as the way you dealt with the last one, skip it. I've been shot, knocked off of scaffolds, powerbombed off of fork lifts, and had eating utensils shoved through my leg. Your little chair shots are about as worrisome to me as a cloudy day.

-Adler