NotorisSTD
League Member
(CUEUP: “Got called in Sick today” by AFI…)
(CUTTO: Parking lot, late night, somewhere in nowhere. Felix Red is huddled between two cars, wrapped up in newspaper, staring blankly off into space, dried snot crusted up all over his upper lip, eyes blood shot, terrible complexion, maybe in not such great shape…)
FELIX: I know you won’t stop following me until I talk to you, and this is not what you came here for, and not what you want to hear. You want your morsel of f(bleep)ked up wisdom for the week. I’m all out of wisdom. You want half-empty threats. You want posturing. I’m not out of hate. But I’ve lost the will to act upon it, or anything else. I’m tired, so tired, of fighting everything. Everyone. I’ve spent most of my life, power, time, heart, thinking I was destroying what destroyed me, convincing myself this way is more honest, or at least paving the way for something better. My father was a deranged, violent man driven by lust for power and greed. My mother was a dead whore. I used to think I could aggrandize my insanity, and infect others with it. I could become too cool and important and to abandon. But if I have a child somewhere I don’t know about, which is a possibility, it will have been born into the same circumstances that I was. Absentee sociopath father. Apathetic, star f(bleep)ker mother. Probably, my father’s father was every bit the bastard he was, and I am now.
The truth is, I haven’t changed anything.
Everything is exactly the same.
Everyone is exactly the same.
The world destroyed me.
My destiny was confirmed the moment I was conceived. I am a monster, and I never had the choice to be anything else….Can’t say I don’t find that somewhat liberating. No more fabricated accountability. No more deception of freedom. I am a slave. And the master commands me to annihilate anything breathing…
You’re all really f(bleep)ked now.
(CUTTO: Parking lot, late night, somewhere in nowhere. Felix Red is huddled between two cars, wrapped up in newspaper, staring blankly off into space, dried snot crusted up all over his upper lip, eyes blood shot, terrible complexion, maybe in not such great shape…)
FELIX: I know you won’t stop following me until I talk to you, and this is not what you came here for, and not what you want to hear. You want your morsel of f(bleep)ked up wisdom for the week. I’m all out of wisdom. You want half-empty threats. You want posturing. I’m not out of hate. But I’ve lost the will to act upon it, or anything else. I’m tired, so tired, of fighting everything. Everyone. I’ve spent most of my life, power, time, heart, thinking I was destroying what destroyed me, convincing myself this way is more honest, or at least paving the way for something better. My father was a deranged, violent man driven by lust for power and greed. My mother was a dead whore. I used to think I could aggrandize my insanity, and infect others with it. I could become too cool and important and to abandon. But if I have a child somewhere I don’t know about, which is a possibility, it will have been born into the same circumstances that I was. Absentee sociopath father. Apathetic, star f(bleep)ker mother. Probably, my father’s father was every bit the bastard he was, and I am now.
The truth is, I haven’t changed anything.
Everything is exactly the same.
Everyone is exactly the same.
The world destroyed me.
My destiny was confirmed the moment I was conceived. I am a monster, and I never had the choice to be anything else….Can’t say I don’t find that somewhat liberating. No more fabricated accountability. No more deception of freedom. I am a slave. And the master commands me to annihilate anything breathing…
You’re all really f(bleep)ked now.