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TWW House Show: Bangor

GreggG

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The TWW had its first house show today, held at the Sawyer Arena in downtown Bangor, Maine. 800 people were in attendance in the 950-seat arena.

Problem Child versus "Tragic" Terry
"Tragic" Terry began this match a house-on-fire, peppering the returning 35-year-old ring veteran with the eternal spirit of misguided youth. However, after suffering a partial fracture in his ring finger after attempting a punch, PC took over. He hit Terry with a quick DDT, climbed to the ropes and hit him with a flying elbow, climbed the ropes and hit him with a flying leg drop, and then once again hit him with a flying elbow. He then hoisted Tragic Terry in the air and hit him with the awesome ADD belly-to-belly spinning piledriver.

Big Daddy vs. Crimson and Clover
Newcomer Big Daddy -- well in excess of 400 pounds -- took on little known tag team Crimson and Clover. They began the match by attempting to dropkick the big man to no avail. They then tried to whip him in the ropes. Big Daddy did not budge. He then took Crimson and grabbed him by the throat and tossed him on top of the top rope, snapping his neck back both violently AND awkwardly. He then grabbed Clover and clenched him in a bearhug while screaming "Who's Your Daddy" until the ref dropped Clover's hands three times after being partially suffocated.

"Iceman" Kevin Kearns vs. "Bangor's Own" Marcus McGraw
Kearns, in recovery after years of addiction, shook hands with McGraw to start the match. They initially began the match in classic old-school scientific wrestling. Kearns was growing frustrated but retained his composure. Then, he claimed McGraw had "looked at my ol' ladies funbags" and punched him in the throat, bit him and put him in the corner and kept on punching him. The ref DQ'd him for excessive violence. But Kearns hooked the ref in the Deep Freeze sleeper until his valet, Lady Veronica, begged him to stop.

The Masked Violators vs. The Ranch Hands
The Ranch Hands came to the ring first, clad in leather chaps while shirtless and greased. The masked men came out to a shockingly large and extended ovation. #2 entered the ring quickly and showed signs of surliness, just beating on Jarret Matthews III without remorse. #1 asked his opponents if they were okay and then rallied the fans into a loud and spirited "U-S-A" chant. The MV's dominated the action. There was a brief power failure knocking the lights out in the Sawyer Arena. When they returned, Shane Stewart was out cold, apparently victim of Moving Violations (which no one has yet to see), and the ref counted 3.

Every fan in attendance was given a coupon guaranteeing them a free test ride at Van Syckle Lincoln Mercury Kia dealership.
 

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