Peter: Unbelievable…I never would’ve thought James Caine would be such a sore loser.

Bertram: And Kansas Dark beat him fair and clean. I think that’s what got into him the worst.

Jim: What’s got into you?

Bertram: Approximately how drunk is he?

Peter:  Dead.

Jim: Pbbbffffttt…brain dead maybe….

 

PA System:

TEN THOUSAND FISTS IN THE AIR…….

 

{Disturbed rattles the floor of the Jobing.com arena as Jeff Jackson walks to the ring stretching his neck and shoulders out. He gets in the ring and focuses on getting that first victory.}

 

Bertram: I’d like to predict right now, that Jeff Jackson is gonna fall flat on his face?

Peter: What makes you think that?

Bertram: He’s too focused…He can’t pay attention to this match with all that focus.

Jim: And they drunk me that I’m tell.

 

PA System:

TALKING BOUT THE CHINA GROVE….WHOA-OH-OH

 

{China Gove by the Doobie Brothers plays from the solo at the end of the song, as the arrival of Assassin is anticipated. Jeff Jackson stands in the ring ready and waiting for him, when he slides under the bottom rope and behind Jeff without Jackson even noticing. Assassin taps Jackson on the shoulder as the music fades, and Jeff turns. Assassin smiles and Jackson swings on Assassin who ducks, grabbing Jackson’s wrist and flipping him.}

 

(*DING!* *DING!* *DING!*)

 

{Jackson is quick to his feet and with a gut punch to Assassin who chops the shoulder of Jackson. The two go back and forth, punch for chop, punch for chop, before Jackson straight kicks Assassin’s leg from under him. Assassin is quick to his feet as they switch positions, and Jeff quickly ties up Assassin, and grabs him for a Russian leg sweep, but Assassin counters and Jeff just falls back hitting his head. Assassin poses for the crowd, as Jackson returns to his feet. Jackson Ties up with Assassin and Assassin quickly applies a side wristlock. Assassin applies some pressure momentarily before switching the maneuver to an octopus stretch. Assassin wrenches four good times on Jacksons ribs and then nods to the crowd and hoists Jackson in the air. Assassin holds Jackson up a moment and even walks in a circle without lowering him at all before slamming him hard onto the mat.}

 

Bertram: Look at the power and skill of Assassin.

Peter: Don’t think it’ll be that easy to beat the wily Jackson.

 

{Assassin covers without hooking the leg, as referee Fritzpatrick drops in for the count….1….2.Kick-out by Jackson. Assassin places a couple of shots into Jackson and goes for a second pin attempt, this time hooking the leg. Fritzpatrick counts it again…..1……T-Kickout by Jackson. Assassin is clearly angered. Assassin pulls Jeff to his feet. Jeff from nowhere wraps Assassin’s head and plants it into the mat with a DDT and the crowd applauds.  Assassin rolls over and sits up rubbing his head, when Jackson applies a sleeper hold submission. Fritzpatrick drops and checks for the submission. Assassin shakes his head no. Assassin tries to stand, but Jackson pulls him down. Assassin starts to slowly fade, and Fritzpatrick checks his arm. He lifts the hand of Assassin and holds it……….Terry drops it and it falls to his side as Fritzpatrick holds up one finger and yells “ONE!”…..Terry picks up the arm again and holds it in the air………..Before dropping it into his side a second time. Jackson wrenches, applying more pressure to Assassin, as Fritzpatrick grabs Assassin’s hand for the third time. Terry raises the arm up………..And Drops it, but Assassin clenches his hand into a fist partway down. Assassin’s hand starts shaking as Jackson wrenches down harder around his neck. Assassin doesn’t seem to be phased by the pain as he pushes his way to a knee, and then to his feet.}

 

Peter: Assassin is fighting off the sleeper!

Bertram: Stop changing your mind woman.

Jim: Don’t talk to Peter like that.

Bertram: Go back to your beer coma.

 

{Assassin grabs Jackson’s head and flips him over his shoulder and flat onto his back, Assassin backs up a step then drops with an elbow drop but Jackson avoids it and rolls away just in time. Jackson is up, as is Assassin, and the two tie up, and Jackson sends Assassin to the ropes. Assassin comes back and Jackson nails a front atomic drop. Assassin holds his groin, and leans forward and smack into a short clothesline from Jackson. Jackson wastes no time and begins stomping on Assassin who takes a few shots, before grabbing Jackson’s foot and rolling Jackson to the middle of the ring. Jackson hits the mat hard, and comes back up swinging as Assassin comes off the ropes with a dropkick. Jackson sidesteps the dropkick and slams Assassin into the mat, and goes for an elbow drop. Assassin rolls out of the way in plenty of time and is back to his feet. Jackson gets up rubbing his elbow and turns around face into Assassin who picks him up with a front atomic drop of his own on Jackson.)

 

Bertram: Back and forth. This could be the match of the night.

Peter:  While indeed a great match Betty…I severely doubt that this will be the show-stealer.

Jim: We still got those two guys fighting…*burp*

Bertram: We’ve got Breeze who’s gonna tear apart the Mighty Moo moo, and a worthless main event handicap match.

Peter:  You completely forgot Vinny Vegas against The Diablo Slayer.

Bertram: I didn’t forget, I didn’t care.

 

{Assassin backs up a bit as Jackson leans into a corner, nursing his children, before taking charge towards the hardcore hero. Jackson looks up in time to see him coming and throws a stiff elbow at the last second into the face of Assassin who is rocked backwards as Jackson lifts himself to the second-rope, and explodes into Assassin with a spear.}

 

Peter:  OH MY SHIRLEY!

Bertram: He calls that the Halifax Explosion, you can see why.

 

{Jackson goes for the cover, and Fritzpatrick drops in for the count..........1……….2……..-Kickout by Assassin. Jackson stands with a sigh, and pulls Assassin to his feet, when Assassin comes out of nowhere and drops Jackson with a fireman’s carry. Assassin doesn’t notice that Jackson grabbed his neck, and as he Stands Jackson stands with him and now has Assassin in a side headlock position. Jackson flips forward and using his momentum twists the neck of Assassin. Jackson hooks a leg and covers.}

 

Peter:  What the hell was that?

Bertram: That would be the Instant Death, and the Hardcore Hero’s main finishing move…how do you not know this Pete?

Peter:  Because I don’t see a lot of em, Brandy.

Jim: Peter doesn’t pay attention…it shows cuz he can’t get nobodies name right.

 

{Referee Fritzpatrick drops in for the count……….1……….2……….3! The referee raises Jackson’s hand as he stands. Assassin isn’t moving very quickly however, but eventually makes it to his feet.}

 

(*DING!* *DING!* *DING!*)

 

Bertram: Well his losing streak has finally ended, now let’s hope this isn’t the start of one for Assassin.

Peter:  I thought Assassin was doing great until that Halifax Explosion. It just took whatever wind he had and flushed it….

Jim: Then he tried a move that should’ve worked, but somehow Jackson switched it into his finisher…

Bertram: How does he do that?

Peter:  What?

Bertram: Have those moments where he talks just fine.

Peter:  Have you not heard of a moment of clarity? He does that at the right times….sometimes.

Jim: Yea so stay away from my pandas!

Bertram: Well either way I think it was a mistake made by Assassin, when he wrapped that Fireman’s carry.

Peter:  I’d say either bad luck, or quick thinking by Jackson.

 

[Commercial]