It seems that a certain XWF Legend has a celebrity crush on yours truly. This old piece of shit can't seem to stop mentioning my name, despite the fact that he's "never heard of me". To him, I'm just a very small blip on his radar, a nobody, a small fish in a big pond. At least, that's what he says.

I find it funny that this guy calls me small time, but can't seem to stop fucking talking about me. He's obviously threatened by me, and I don't blame him. Jayzon Williamz thought he was going to come back and dominate like he did back in the day, but he's instead finding out that he's not going to have as easy of a time as he'd initially hoped. He's finding out that him dominating in the XWF would be like that girl from Precious dominating a 50 yard dash.

Case in point: he had the easiest match in the world last week when he was booked against a fellow legend in Centurion, and he barely got a win. Centurion has become a joke to the rest of us, a walking punch line who commands about as much respect from us as Tila Tequila does from Juggalos. And as far as the match went, the only two people in the world who cared about it were the two men who participated in it. Talk about yourselves a little more, you egotistical bastards. You should've heard these two pompous assholes in the back, talking about how it was going to be match of the year, and that they were going to show us young guys how it's done. Watch and learn, right boys? Well, I was watching and you know what I saw? I saw two guys put a crowd of avid wrestling fans to sleep faster than a bottle of Nyquil ever could.

And lets talk about how the night ended for a second, while I'm on the subject of has beens. We got to see the return of Steve Jason, a return that no one wanted.

SJ, how much damage are you intending to do to your reputation before you finally figure out that you just don't have it anymore? You said that you figure since Jayzon Williamz is still doing it that you can do it too. Newsflash, motherfucker: Williamz isn't doing a damn thing but embarrassing himself, and if your intentions are to follow in his footsteps, then you're more of a tool than I thought.

Isn't Steve Jason supposed to be the legend to end all legends, and here he is, riding the coattails of a guy that only the most hardcore of wrestling fans remember. Well, them and Centurion, who's taken it upon himself to remind us every other second about the CCWF and the early days of the XWF, as if anyone gives a fuck about them. Centurion is the XWF's version of a Vietnam veteran, sitting on the steps of the local city hall and boring you to death with the same old stories, day in and day out, trying to relive his days of glory by telling them with boring details that seem to change each time he revisits the memory. Move the fuck on, Cent. Those days are long gone, and I speak for everyone here now when I say good fucking riddance. If I'm here in six years talking about this tournament, someone please shoot me in the face. You don't see guys like Blizzard talking about their past exploits, nor do you see it from Drake Komodo, James Raven, or anyone who's not a smug asshole.

Steve Jason's return is only going to prove that you legends of yesterday should stay retired. The game has evolved since you've gone, and it's grown beyond you. Rather than trying to prove you can still hang, you should all take a cue from The Brand and just fucking watch and enjoy as we carry on the XWF legacy.

My gripes with you legends don't stop there, but you're not the priority this week, and I have a feeling I'll be seeing a few of you soon enough anyway.

Instead, my focus is on the Universal Title tournament, and my first opponent in said tournament: Dante Anglais.

Now, Captain Eyebrows used to be the GM, but decided to quit when James Raven got hurt for reasons unknown, at least until now. This motherfucker quit because he saw an opening in the Universal Title picture, and is trying to cash in favors with Aidan Collins to get a shot at it.

So it looks as if Collins is giving him an opportunity, but he's giving the same opportunity as he's giving everyone else.

Well, almost.

Everyone else has an easy matchup. Dante got matched up with the motherfucker that everyone else asked not to be matched up with. Obviously, Aidan Collins doesn't hold you in a very high regard.

Why does everyone else on the roster have an easy matchup? Because everyone else on the roster is mediocre at best, and on any given night any one of them can be beaten. The only member of the XWF that rises above mediocrity and actually exemplifies greatness is me. I am the Alpha amongst this mangy pack of wolves, and this entire tournament is just the circumstance I need to prove it.

Ace Vincent is going to become the Universal Title in a record setting amount of time as an active competitor, and when that happens, none of you crybaby bitches will be able to dispute it. You won't be able to say that I was given easy matches. You won't be able to say that I leapfrogged the rest of the roster because I have connections. You won't be able to say anyone deserves it more than me because by the time I win that title I'll have beaten anyone and everyone who is considered a competitor.

I'm going to show why Ace Vincent is the future of the XWF, and the next superstar to cast a shadow so big that the entire roster will be eclipsed by it. By Christmas, Collins will be begging me to take a break and let everyone have a chance. He won't be able to keep his roster full because you'll all quit after entering the ring with me on two feet and leaving on a stretcher. You'll stare up at the arena lights as you're wheeled out, thinking to yourself, "I can never be as good as that man, and I will never survive another encounter with him."

Right now, Aidan Collins is looking at me as his next big star, and the new face of the XWF. I'm young, I'm confident, and I'm extremely fucking talented.

Do you really think he wants to stick Jayzon Williamz on an XWF poster? Yeah, let's make that guy the face of the company. The public is clamoring for a fake gangster who has cliche tattoos and can't spell his own fucking name right. This motherfucker lost points on the SAT before he even answered a question. His IQ score is lower than Dynamic Dynamite's white blood cell count.

There I go again, making Williamz my bitch. If it were any easier it'd be named Tyger Lilly, but he probably doesn't know who she is either, because he's so famous that no one has given a fuck about where he's been for the past five years.

You should consider yourself lucky that I was too busy finishing high school while your ass was at the top of his game in the XWF, cause if I'd have been around, nobody would know who the fuck you are. In a few years, people are going to be talking about Ace Vincent and his reign of dominance, and the only thing they'll know about you is that you're mentioned somewhere on the website, and upon finding your picture, will be too afraid to click on it for fear that it'll redirect them to a gay porn site.

I really should talk a little bit about Dante Anglais, but I can't help but hate on this motherfucker. Everything about this dude pisses me off. He's from the West Coast, he lives a "gangsta" lifestyle, and he has Thug Life tattooed on his fucking stomach.

If you want an example of how un-gangster this fucking dude is, listen to how he says I don't deserve a match with him. He'll fight me in the street, because when I beat his ass he's pretty confident that no one else is gonna see it. When I beat him in the ring, there's going to be a live fucking audience, and it's going to be recorded in the history books as a loss to Ace Vincent, a fucking nobody.

This is the dude that runs his mouth in high school and wants you to throw the first punch so he can go run and tell the teacher that you're bullying him.

You should've came back and watched before you decided to run your mouth. You should've scouted your competition a little more instead of seeing names like Centurion and Trent Gein and expecting things to be the way they used to be.

Shit's changed, motherfucker. I just pray that I'm the guy who gets to show you how much. This thing between us is far from over, and I might even interfere in your matches just to ensure you progress in the tournament. If things go my way, and they will, then it's going to come down to you and me in the finals, and I'm going to give you the send off that you and every other legend who can't seem to figure out when his time is up deserve: a broken neck.

Now that I've handled my light work, let's move on to the man of the hour: Dante Anglais.

One look at this dude and you realize something: he needs to tweeze his fucking eyebrows. Seriously, this cat's eyebrows are so big and bushy, it looks like he glued two black cats to his face. I'm also a big fan of his fauxhawk and scarf, which he wears even in the summer.

I hear he's a big fan of indie flicks and coffee shops, listens to The Shins, and drives a smart car. Well, he may drive a smart car, but he's a dumb ass.

I didn't realize that with all of the gothic wrestlers, the thug wrestlers, and the hardcore wrestlers, that there was any room left for another genre of douchebag, but Dante Anglais is here to prove me wrong!

He calls himself the Anti-Christ, so I guess he went to the Marylin Manson school of nicknames, much like Jayzon Williamz went to the Fred Durst Spelling Academy. I'd like to know how you can be a hipster and a devil worshipper. Do you spike your iced mocha latte with goat blood instead of skim milk? Do you only listen to your Jason Mraz CD backwards? Do you have a pentagram stenciled onto the back of your Macbook Pro?

He also calls himself "The Uprising", which makes about as much sense as an M. Night Shamylan movie, but the nickname remains and that piece of shit continues to have his movies greenlit.

To call yourself The Uprising would be to imply that you're a revolutionary, but I've got news for you motherfucker: revolutionaries don't conform to lower level management positions, which is exactly what you did by becoming the Anarchy GM. Anyone who pretends they have good intentions immediately abandons their integrity any time they taste a little snippet of power, which is exactly what you did when you purposely lost a match with Emo in which the victory gave him an automatic shot at the World title, the date of said shot being up to him.

As a GM, you were a judgmental, biased, easily swayed asshole who wouldn't know the meaning of fair play if it kicked you in the face, and as a wrestler you were even worse, which is exactly why you jumped at the chance to be the GM in the first place. You were never going to be the main event as a wrestler, so you instead thrust yourself into that position by inserting yourself into the Hell On Earth main event, which saw Kieran King take on Drake Komodo for the Universal Title, a match that had fuck all to do with you.

I see through you, man. You're just a kid who wants attention, and if you can't get it based on talent alone, then you're going to use politics instead.

I'm curious to see what kind of bullshit you try and pull on me this coming Anarchy. Maybe you'll try to attack me before the match, or maybe you'll have Emo interfere during, but you should realize that no matter what you do, your drive to be noticed will never surpass my drive to be the best. I will never tap out, and I will never lay down. I will fight until I die if need be, and when it comes to you, I seriously doubt that will be a situation I find myself in.

How does it feel knowing that not only are you an underdog in this match, but that the man you're facing is the favorite to win the entire tournament? I'm sure it cuts your sensitive ass to the bone, but you should know that while everyone else is counting you out already, I'm not.

I'm preparing for this match as if I'm facing James Raven or Steve Jason in his prime. I'm putting in the work, and I'm going to put on the performance of a lifetime when we meet in that ring on Thursday. You're probably counting on me underestimating you, which is exactly why I'm not. It's easy for someone to fight like an underdog when their opponent underestimates them, but you're going to be getting the best Ace Vincent that's ever been in the ring.

Mohammed Ali beat Joe Frazier in Manila after underestimating him. Imagine what would've happened in that fight had Ali trained as if he were terrified of Joe Frazier. He would've crushed him. The problem with Ali is that he had nothing left to prove. Unlike him, I do.

I'm here to prove that I'm the best. I'm here to step out of the shadow of my mentor and to create my own legacy amongst the halls of Truth Until Death. Aidan Collins laid the foundation for us, and Drake Komodo built the walls. Ace Vincent is here to finish the job, and I will not stop until I'm holding that Universal Title over my head.

I don't plan on stopping there. That'd be too shortsighted for a man of my vision. The Universal Title is just the first stop on my road to greatness. Not only will I be able to hang with Aidan Collins and Drake Komodo, but I'll surpass them. I don't want to be remembered as a protege of Truth Until Death, but as their greatest member.

Last Thursday I proved that I can live up to my billing. This Thursday I'm going to prove that the rest of you can't.

Truth Until Death.