...Chaos Theory titles?
What's a lotta chaos without a little insanity?
Nothing.
That's what...and here these assbandits were gonna book this match without me.
What the fuck were they thinking?
Hell what is anyone thinking right now.
Let's recap a moment shall we?
My nephew has been kidnapped,
Evan Michaels is running the show,
And as impossible as it may seem...
I'm a little more nuts.
I just wish I knew who the fuck was responsible for this travesty.
This assinine stunt that wound up leaving that sumbitch in charge.
Who's roasted lightbulb was behind that move?
Oh who gives a hoot... I should worry about this match.
This match I was only booked in because Evan felt I needed to let off some STEAM...
As he put it anyway.
I guess I could look at it like that I mean.
Who all is in this thing anyway?
If I take a look at the names...
Jesus Christ Superstar....
....
....
Are you fucking kidding me?
Seriously?
Do I need to even address him as far as this match goes?
I mean, I could say something, but what hasn't been said about a no-talent shit for brains like this guy before?
Matt Ward?
OOOOHHH... big tree looking mother fucker huh.
Scary tree, scary tree.
Don't make me laugh any more, just the mention of JCS did that enough.
I mean I'm sure he could come back and say something about his years of experience...
And the countless number of incoherent psychopath wannabes he's beaten over the years...
But have any of em been me?
The ORIGINAL NUTJOB...
Yea, no, didn't think so.
NEXT!
Wait a second...
Hold up...
Just a minute...
These two names here peek out at me with some problems.
Dazz...and Vinny Vegas...
You know if Evan wouldn't have booked me in this I might have sat at home...
I might've called my bookie...
And I damn well might have put my money on one or both of these two men to win.
BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUTTTTT....
That's not what happened.
I did get put into this, and I'm not going to be sitting at home.
Instead I'm going to be all in their faces with fists, feet, and even a headbutt or five.
Now I know Dazz has about as much experience as me... but Vegas. He's still a first year rookie.
I take nothing from the kid...He's got a lot of potential.
But having a lot of potential is like almost getting laid.
When the big moment comes... Almost just doesn't count...
Unless of course you're playing with horse shoes and hand grenades.
And this ain't either damn one of those so...
Where's that leave Vinny?
Holding a pair of dueces...
But watch the spunk filled rookie call me on that one...
Rookie Mistake numero uno for him.
Who wants to place a bet on that one?
Come on...anyone? Anyone?
Ahhh you're all a bunch of pantywaists.
Speaking of pantywaists.
Who the fuck invited Maxx Kalifornia here?
There's a name I haven't seen since EhW.
There's a name nobody has gave a crap about since ever.
I got a half a million says he's gonna open his battleship mouth and say something dumb his rowboat ass can't handle.
...
Is it sinking in yet folks?
I only make a bet I'm gonna win.
While I'm on the subject of winning...Let's talk about somebody who's got some experience doing just that.
Dazz...
Now here's a nigga I could see me getting my ass kicked by...
...
Maybe once or twice...
IF… I'm feeling nice.
And right now...I'm not feeling like a very nice person.
In fact, I'm feeling just a little unsane.
Which means I'm just starting to feel that...much...
Better.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
|Sunday September 14th 2008 |
|Tempe, Arizona |
|James Caine’s Apartment|
I laid there in my bed next to Danielle. She was gorgeous and we had amazingly been together for about a month now. I moved myself up against the headboard of my king-size bed and lit a menthol. As I enjoyed the carcinogens filling my lungs I let my mind wander over work, and life.
My nephew was missing, I had a clusterfuck match coming up in a week, and to top it all off… I still had bills to pay, and a move to make. Somehow I had to deal with all this, and it seemed like nothing at all to me.
I mean hell what do I really have to stress about? I have money coming out of my ears, I’ve got experience out my ass, a wonderful woman, and I piss talent. Sure, my nephew is missing, but it’s not like he won’t be found. I’m going to have to move because the company is moving, but that’s no big thing, considering I’ll be moving back to what I consider home. Hell maybe I can buy back the old property and rebuild the original Alice’s. The only uncertainty there is whether or not Danielle would be as alright with the move as I hoped she would.
“unh…what’s the matter?” Danielle said half asleep as she rolled onto her side and looked at me.
“Nothing honey, just got a few things on my mind.” I answered her, as I kissed her forehead. I threw my feet over the edge of the bed and stood up after crushing out my cigarette. I stretched and walked to the sliding door, and gazed out at the night lights of Tempe. It was a nice looking place, but in all honesty I was tired of it. I was tired of the heat, the people, the prices… Hell maybe I was just tired period.
Danielle pushed herself up as she reached for her cigarettes, “You wanna talk about it?” she asked.
“Nah babe, it’s nothing your friendly neighborhood psychopath can’t handle.” I answered her as I reached down and grabbed my pants. The sound of the coffee pot in the kitchen caught my attention as it clicked on and began to percolate. “Damn…Morning already.”
“Are you sure you’re okay?”
I almost wished she’d stop pestering me, but I knew this was the last time she’d ask. “I’m fine, it’s just that… I know you’ve gotten comfortable here over the past month, but… the company is moving to Michigan, and if I want to keep working then-“
“We’re moving back to Michigan.” She said finishing my sentence for me, almost as if she was making a definitive statement.
I stood there and just kind of stared at her for a little.
“Is that what’s bothering you?”
I tilted my head to the side as I finished putting on my jeans, “I wasn’t sure how you’d take the news.”
“James, my family is all back in Michigan, why would I not want to go with you? What kind of reaction would you expect?”
I thought about what she said, and realized that I now looked like an ignorant jackass. I dropped my head for a moment before moving to the end of the bed and crawling up to kiss her. “I’m sorry, I love you.”
“I love you too.” She replied, before I headed off to start my day.