Journal Entry--4th of January, 2010
And that’s pretty much where it started really, or maybe that’s not where it began…Maybe it began back in nineteen ninety eight, when I cheated on my fiancé`, Veya Starr Davis, and she took my only son away from me. It’s hard sometimes, to sit and think about the past, but in this cold, dark chamber that and working out is all I have to do. Oh, and write. I guess I must be lucky or something because the Warden gave me colored pencils to write with now too. As I sit here and stare at a point in the concrete wall where three cracks converge I think about all these things and I pause only a moment to write in this journal. I think about all of the What IF’s…in my life. For example, WHAT IF, I had remained faithful…
*I tilt my back as I lay my pencil down and actually close my eyes to visualize what might have happened.*
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(Your screen fades in as a Hinder’s ‘Get Stoned’ begins as you see James Caine in black and white sitting in the corner of a cold cell. He is holding a notebook and leaning his head back as the screen transitions to color with images of him with the outline of Veya Davis, and the full image of his son. At the chorus line he sees himself with the first woman he cheated with. The next shot is him alone in his hotel room with a picture of Veya and Richard as he smokes a doobie. Eventually the screen transitions to show images of the three of them, Shadow Veya, Richard, and James on New Year’s Eve 2010 Watching the ball drop in Times Square on a huge Television……As the ball ends its drop the song fades out along with the color and the dream and back to James Caine thinking to himself as he writes inside the cell and voice over his thoughts. )
So that’s what if huh… That’s a big damn what if…What if I had not cheated, gotten married, and had a wonderful family, half assed career, and well sucked. DAMN DAMN DAMN. Glad I fucked that damn waitress now. HA HA! Go ahead and TRY to censor me Jon Tees, See how far you get with that one. *James Smiles*Damn, What IF…What IF…What if I hadn’t ran away from that old ladies house and wound up underground wrestling at sixteen…
(James Caine tilts his head back and thinks as a song begins to play and all he sees is himself at the age of sixty flipping a burger in a fast food restaurant. The song immediately cuts off, and James snaps back to black and white with a disgusted look on his face.)
DAMN! I’m Glad I ran from there too… I could’ve went to college and everything and I’d only have been flipping fucken burgers. Ummm… No thanks, I’d rather kick ass and take names please, Thank-you, Do you want Fries with THAT? Okay, Okay, another What If James Caine scenario Journal, alright, here’s one for ya. What IF I hadn’t been born to a family of crazy people?
(James tilts his head back and closes his eyes and the screen transitions to color once again and a hard AC/DC-ish rock theme begins to play as the image comes into focus. The image is of nothing more than, himself with a cigar and a hat on the side of the street. He is holding a piece of cardboard that reads: “I bet you can’t hit me with a quarter!” He laughs out loud and snaps the dream bubble back to the black and white again.)
Well now there you have it. I’m a bona fide wild nutty mother fucking psycho ass crazy head. But we already knew that didn’t we folks?
(James throws his head back and laughs psychotically, before looking at the camera and eerily tilting his head really far to one side and glaring at the lens with his sadistic eyes, that almost appear to change color, even in the black and white image as your screen fades back to black.)
‘Diary of a Psycho’--8th of January, 2010
James had a visitor on this day that shocked him apparently. The identity of this man made even Caine scratch his head in wonder, but the words he brought with him were pure gold. Caine took every one and ran with it back to his cell to enter into his journal, the only friend he thought he had left in all the world, before today.