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Book XI: Chapter X7 “Seraph and I have an unusual chemistry , a great chemistry, even,” James Caine admits to the female reporter. “We go out there, and we get the job done. We work cooperatively to just do whatever it takes to get the job done. I have no idea where his mindset’s at, but mine is that I’ve got to go into every match alone. I just hope he doesn’t stab me in the back when I’m not looking. I almost expect it to happen for all the partners I've turned on; I just hope Karma doesn’t come back to haunt me. As far as this week... Well This week we go into individual matches, actually I'm paired with the coke Kid. I know he can do his job, and won't stab me in the back... But I've been accused of complaining about the match. The truth is, If I were going to complain, I'd want DQ's allowed, and it to be one on one. That way I could break Draco with my bare hands. So I could toss him around, and beat his so far down into the mat, when I pick him up again his face peels. Make him bleed with nothing but pure wrestling skill... Something the 'Daywalker'... knows jack shit about.”Caine stated squarely covered in sweat from his previous singles match within the currently remodling XWA. "And waht about Angel and Seraph. Seraph has already spilled harsh words to Angel. Any thoughts on your partner's match?" the reporter questioned, obviously eyeballing Caine. "I heard what Seraph had to say, and his name would actually be Seraphim. But he cuts it short. He kinda forgot to mention that. But I'll go ahead and let the stupid people who wouldn't get that know. See that's teamwork tight there. I watch out for him, he watches out for me. We keep our eyes open, and our fists closed. Draco, or his woman try anything funny, and I'll be right there. Maybe I'll bring someone respectable with me. Hell maybe I'll bring an insult with me. Who knows... Alls I can say is this... Monday night, I'll get my job done, Seraph is gonna get his done... And when the four of us square off...Team MYFFLA against Seraph and Caine... We're gonna go to work, and get the job done again. It's just that simple, and there's only two things "the mayflys" can do about it. Wait, wait, wait... Listen closely..... You hear that? All around the world, the loyal psychotix who still stay true even when I turn my back to them are saying it with me... Nothing... and LIKE IT!" Caine says holding his fingers up to accent his point. He then storms off the camera, and the shot pulls back and swirls around to reveal Caine cooking something in his leopard print speedo. "Yup that was what? Wednesday... The fair was Monday, and Tuesday... Today was Thursday... my day off from everything... my 29th birthday. You know what I did folks...I ate some food, I ran 24 miles, I ate some more food, I worked out, for a change of pace I called Seraph and made a promo, I Fucked the shit out of Ivvy, smoked two joints, took a shit and a nap, now here I am finishing the promo I started while I make... what else, but more food. You see I love to cook, but that doesn't mean shit does it? So What should I talk to you all about? How about I tell the world Exactly what's going to happen Monday night?" James Pauses for effect as he drains the pan and we see roughly a pound of bacon. Just as he finishes the bacon juice, Four pieces of toast pop simultaneously from the toaster. "Yea, you'd like to know that wouldn't you... But I think there's something else I'd like to the world about first... Perhaps a lesoon in magik is in order." Caine says as he places a stack of bacon between the toast making a huge sandwich. He retrieves a head of lettuce and garnishes the bacon and toast sandwhich, before sticking it with a toothpick. He smiles as he heads to his smaller dining table. "First off, we have this card...believe it or not, most people who don't use it... Don't use it because it's not fair. It's a cheater. It's called the joker folks, and it's the most powerful card in the deck. Why is that? Well........." Caine sets his plate down and holds a joker to the camera. With his last line he trails off before flicking his wrist and the card that was once a joker becomes a king of diamonds. "Because this card is worth any value you claim it as..... And as many of you may not know... My opponent this week called me a joker, and my partner a king. Then gave himself the lowly seven." Caine says with a look of fake shock, before taking a bite of his monster sandwhich. "So how does that make sense because poof I'm a king, and that's a perfect pair... If Poor Draco had a clue he'd see that he's going to lose all the chips he brought to the table with that hand. I'm sorry. But all you have to do isknow how to manipulate cards. Exscuse me." Caine shrugs and then chuckles at the camera before finishing the sandwich in three more bites. As he licks his lips and a piece of lettuce hangs from his lips the scene begins to change. You criticize... But your fantasy... Is as flawed as mine... What will you do? When it's revealed... Hypocrisy... Moving pictures... That will show... Just end your life... It's not worth it... After all. "Is it simple enough for you? Does everybody understand? Are you all still following me? Is it simple enough for you? Does everybody understand? Are you all still following me? Is it simple enough for you? Does everybody understand? Are you all still following me? Is it simple enough for you? Does everybody understand? Are you all still following me?" Mindless Self indulgence's Stupid mother fucker is playing the background gently as James Caine and Seraph are dressed and Draco and Angel. They are sitting in what would appear to be a teenager's bedroom with the music moderately loud behind them. The door is shut, and the room a mess. "So like... yea...We're so gonna win right?" says Draco. "Def-Def-Definately...Definately win..." Says angel. "I know we'll win... The cards told me so yesterday... Plus... I'm a vampire... I can see the future you know..." Says Draco. "No you can't dumbass." "Yes I can. I will also live forever."says Draco. "You have smoked yourself retarded." says Angel. "I don't do recreational drugs. I drink blood." says Draco. "And you play with a metal goat...So if you haven't smoked or drank yourself stupid. What did Caine knock that much sense out of ya last week?"Angel says. "Should I talk slower like you're a retard Should I talk slower like you're retarded Yo they think you're dumb I think you're smart No, wait, I lied I think you're dumb Should I talk slower like you're a retard Should I talk slower like you're retarded Yo they think you're dumb I think you're smart No, wait, I lied I think you're dumb They think you're dumb I think you're smart No, wait, I lied I think you're dumb" "I guess he must have. I mean he did drop me pretty hard. I'll be sure not to watch for that again. And it's not like he'll change his style completely around just for me. Haha I'm too good for that."Draco says. "So what did the cards tell you?" Angel questioned. "That we're gonna win. this one card was talking about mops and cheese dust, and pepsi. The other one was talking about I don't know... I fell asleep. But they were just like Caine and Seraph and they were dumb."Draco says making motions with his hands and staring at them. The entire time Angel has just been staring at Draco with lustful eyes. "Get it Get it Get it You just dont get it Get it Get it Get it You stupid motherfucker You stupid motherfucker You stupid motherfucker" "I mean seriously... I think the guy should've just never been born, and his mommy should've gotten a coat hanger." Draco says to Angel. "Man... now you sound like a fourth grade Kaige fan. How are you expecting to beat him and Coke kid. I'd bet even just the cokehead could kick your ass anymore. "Shut up. I hate you. you're worse than he is. You talk to much." Says Draco angrily. "Well you're the one who's crazier than he is... I mean fuck I think you've just gone dumb. You can't even keep up with his train of thought. You think he's incoherent have you heard yourself talk? Oh yea you don't, you spare the world the trouble of hearing you be incoherent. You're silently stoopid is what you are isn't it." Angel begins yelling at Draco. "And another thing... Why don't you answer the god damn phone when I call. You know I worry about you and wonder where you are... Don't Look at me like that. No... It's not going to happen." Angel says as Draco's lip begins to quiver. "Oh alright." Angel says and wraps and arm around his head and holds him against his chest. "Why do you have to yell like that?" Draco says as he begins sucking his thumb. Just then is when the cards Draco had left sitting all about his messy floor seemed to come to life. "You stupid motherfucker You stupid motherfucker You stupid motherfuck Is it simple enough for you? Does everybody understand? Are you all still following me? Is it simple enough for you? Does everybody understand? Are you all still following me? Is it simple enough for you? Does everybody understand? Are you all still following me? Is it simple enough for you? Does everybody understand? Are you all still following me? Should I talk slower like you're a retard? Should I talk slower like you're retarded?' "Ryan! Keep it down up there! You'll wake up your brother! It's 2 o'clock in the fucking morning!!!" Comes the voice from downstairs. "YES BUT MOTHER FOR THE LAST TIME IT'S DRACO!" says Draco as the cards begin chasing him down the hallway. Meanwhile Angel is fighting off the haunted mop that had come to life and was beating him down in a corner. "What the fuck is going on? This place is haunted man...We need to get out of your moms." Angels says attempting to lock the mops blows. "I know but OWF isn't paying us enough... Why else would we have to sell that cheap merchandise?" Draco says as he begins lighting cards aflame with his zippo. Just then Angel grabs the mop and breaks it in half, tossing it through the window. "That's it... I'm done... That mop fucking started to hurt. There was bleach in the end of that and that fucking shit is hurting my eyes." Seraph says taking off the wig. "Aww... but I was havin fun..." Caine says as he stops lighting cards and stands up and chases after Seraph. "I'm goin to the bar." Seraph says as he heads out the door and down the hall. "Sweet, I am all about that. Actin like those two homos has givin me a craving for some nachos, and a doobie." says Caine as he follows after Seraph and shuts the door. The camera slowly zooms into a poster of Team MYFLLA that has been defecated and destroyed nearly beyond recognition.. "Yo, they think you're dumb I think you're smart No, wait, I lied I think you're dumb" They think you're dumb I think you're smart No, wait, I lied I think you're dumb" At this point the scene cuts to a clip of a younger James Caine recording a video segment of the song with Mindless Self Indulgence from inside his Cell at Alice's. Caine puts his face right in front of the camera and mouths the words. "Get it? Get it? Get it? You just dont get it!!!" The scene fades with the following words. It's not hard, To mock A retard. One only needs To pretend, They have No brain, And They shall find Their opponents For what they truly Are... Beheaded. |The Dead Festival Pt. IV| |
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