You know, this is week number two. I mean, for the past two weeks I came out here, as your World heavyweight champion, and…again…for the past two weeks, I have found myself laying on the ground looking up. Was it from my opponents? No. Was it from Mia Sanchez? No. Was it from my crazy ass wife who found out about me beating on a girl? No. It was from X-Treme Wrestling Federation LEGEND Jayzon Williams.

LEGEND Jayzon Williamz. Jayzon, for the past two weeks has attacked me throughout my title reign. Jayzon, listen to me carefully. I hope you take a good hard look at yourself. I want you to look in that mirror, look at yourself…and ask yourself…what the fuck have you gotten yourself in to? What the fuck have you done? Because, Jayzon, you make me wish I see you in that ring sometime in the near future. You make me dream of all of the things that I want to do to you in that ring…and, to be honest, it’s a good feeling to apply. Let me tell you.

But, Jayzon, I know you’re going to gloat about how you are a legend and how I don’t deserve to be in the same ring as you, blah, blah, blah…but it won’t matter…because, well, take a look at MY record, sir.

Jem Williams, Dynamic Dynamite, Trent Gein, Daniel Malcolm. All of those people are legends. All of those people, however, got beat…by me! All of those legends could, and will, tell you that the only man that took them to the limit, that took them to the brink of utter destruction, that took them to near DEATH. And that man, my friend, is the man that stands before you today.

Jayzon, I want you in that ring. I NEED you in that ring. If I get you in that ring, then you will see that I am taking full notice on you. Then you will see that I deserve to hold this belt and that you, Jayzon, will NOT lay a finger n me…mainly because your fingers will all be snapped like a fucking twig. Jayzon, I hope you’re listening to this and I hope that deep down in that damaged brain of yours you are having second thoughts, that DEEP DOWN goose bumps because, sir, YOU HAVE ALL thought so much about me because…well…too bad you are going feel it anyways..

Now, let me get to my opponent this week…DOCTOR Emo. The master that holds that key to EVERYTHING in the XWF. The man that holds his ticket to a possible world title, a title that I have fought so long and so hard for in my career here in the XWF and, honestly, I am not going to let some punk who looks like Justin Bieber take this title away from me in a fight. BUT…this was originally scheduled as a regular tournament match. No titles on the line. No one to feud, etcetera, etcetera.

So…not only does Dr. Emo, if that is his real name, got me first round. Not only do I have to worry about getting beat and, ultimately, getting out of the tournament…but…ladies and gentlemen, I signed a contract saying that if I lose…

…I have to give up my World title. That’s right. I agreed to that shit. Why would anyone sign something that heinous? Well, it’s simple really…I’m that damn confident that next week…I will be moving up on that bracket…and I know I will be holding on to this title that I hold right now and, next week, I don’t care who I have…I will take them out, just like I took out Dr. Emo.

What Dr. Emo forgot is that I was seventeen time X-Treme champion. A title that, if you remember, is defended 24/7 three hundred and sixty five days a fucking year. I’m used to people asking for challenges and, normally, getting that title back around my waist by the end of the night. But, Dr. Emo, what you do and will know at the end of the day is that you are just a few meer measly little seconds away from your very own “Welcome to the ‘Big Tyme’ Moment!”