I enter the bathroom after a hard night of drinking. I have never drank so much booze in my life. I don’t even make it to the toilets and I lunge and get a clean grasp of the sink and just begin puking in the sink. Tan-colored liquid hits the bowl hard and some of it splashes me in the face. The first wave is over…I gasp for the few breathes I can. I turn on the water so that the puke that I just regurgitated into the sink, leaving a rusty look to the sink, that looks like I am the only one who is washing out my fresh puke…I look at the rusty mirror and notice what someone in marker said “For a gud tyme call” some numbers who, looks to me, is scratched out many times….however, the numbers “1” and “7” are somewhat visible.
I am getting a huge headache. I lean over the sink; my knuckles are turning as white as the cheap porcelain that this bar’s sink is supposed to look like. I can feel every nerve in my entire body begin to flow down and every nerve fiber fire and relax as it travels throughout my body. I begin to shake and, all of a sudden, I feel the puke rush up and, yet again, it begins to rush out of my body and out of my mouth.
This time, however, I look up and there I can see my reflection smiling back at me. I know I’m not smiling because, well…puking isn’t something that I don’t normally like to do. I’m not a fucking anorexic or bulimic or whatever the fuck that is. However, I stand there…wiping the puke away from my mouth…standing in a public bathroom staring into the mirror where my reflection is laughing at me. However, looking at the mirror I notice he’s…clean shaven…and there’s not puke dripping off of his lip…like I feel on my lip.
Aren’t you supposed to be my reflection? What happened to your puke?
Well, yeah…but I am not a fan of all that gunky shit you spew out of your mouth. Oh and aren’t you supposed to be a wrestler? Look at yourself? You’re doing the same thing people who are homeless wind up doing. You are doing the same things drunks do, the same thing that people who don’t have millions of dollars doing things that they love to do are doing. Pull your fucking self together.
I just lost to Daniel Malcolm. I had him beat. I had him dead to rights.
Yeah, you did…I was there, remember?
I hang my head at the horrible joke my reflection just said.
I remember you were ready to put Dan out of the way, in the back burner. Then what happened? You tagged out.
My head pops up and looks at my reflection who is holding his arms out.
I tagged out?
Did I stutter? Did it ever occur to you that maybe Zero Conformity hasn’t done anything for your career? Did it ever occur to you that, initially, Nick Ryan and Dynamic Dynamite didn’t want you?! Remember, Nick Ryan and Dynamic Dynamite didn’t want you to join them? Remember how you just really wanted to prove that you belonged in the presence of two great wrestlers? Then what did you wind up realizing?
Well...I am starting to re…
No, Rizz…you realized that, just like in other stables in the past, that you…yes, you…are better than the stable mates that are with you. You know that you, Rizz, are the one that outshined both Nick Ryan and Dynamic Dynamite and, honestly, I think those two are below you, right now. Rizz. I guess what I’m saying is before you joined Nick Ryan and Dynamic Dynamite were up…here…
My reflection puts his hand up high.
You were down right around….well, here.
He puts his other hand in the midline of the imaginary chart.
You joined Zero Conformity and, now, you were inching up…closer…and close…and closer. Trent came in, made you even work even harder, but also made guys like Nick and Double D to lower their standards and…oh, what’s happening here?
My reflection begins to move his hands and meets them in the middle from where he started.
Look at that, Rizz. It’s normal. But that’s not the end of it. All of a sudden…uh-oh…uh-oh….UH-OH
QUICKLY the reflection moves the hands to the opposite sides again, this time with the side portraying me up high and the side portraying Zero Conformity down below. I begin pacing back and forth…I look over at the mirror and my reflection begins following me
Trust me, you are good enough to do this by yourself. If you don’t think so, your career may be over before it ever starts. Hell, if you can’t trust me…who else CAN you trust?
I stop walking and rush over to the sink, again, and start coughing up the remaining puke that was left in my throat. I slowly look up at the mirror…there I am…puke hanging down my bottom lip. I wipe it off before going back out of the bathroom.
Mia Sanchez…and Oren…The world champion…and someone who, honestly, I could care less about. I mean, I know he won some sort of huge title and defended the title, like, what? Once? Twice? Maybe even three times? Kudos to you, sir. Welcome back to mediocrity. Let’s just say this moment right here, Oren, is your fifteen minutes of fame. This moment right here? It’s your best thing going for you, if I have anything to say about it. So I would put this on a loop somewhere in your house and start playing this first paragraph over…and over…and over again. Just know that you, Oren, aren’t worth my damn time.
Now on to Mia Sanchez. If you noticed last week…I mentioned you and I mentioned you for a reason. That reason, Mia, was to get your attention. I’m glad I got it. Mia, I hope I didn’t SCARE you because, honestly, I’m getting you ready for your life as World champion. I mean, you are not going to face guys like Peter Gilmour or Jerry Attrick again. Right now, you got myself, you got Dynamic Dynamite, and you got a whole line of other top superstars waiting…salivating…ready to BURST for their chance to get at you and beat you. Right now, you got guys in the back that are LEGENDS just waiting for their chance at bat and ready for that slow pitch to come right across that plate so he can SMASH that sucker.
So, Mia…my question for you is…when you face guys like myself, guys like Dynamic Dynamite and other legends here in the X-Treme Wrestling Federation, how will you handle yourself? I mean, are you going to fight for your right…or are you just going to tuck your tail between your legs and high tail it out of there at the first sign of danger?
Mia, I know you have your boy James Raven on the side giving you pointers…giving you ideas and different moves. But 9 out of 10 times, James Raven is not going to be there to hold your hand. James Raven isn’t going to be there by your side and in your corner. You, Mia, have to realize that and take that into account.
Mia, I’m not going to bash you like, I know, a few guys in the X-Treme Wrestling Federation are going to do. I’m not going to say anything that demeans you. In fact…unlike my partner…I want you to succeed. I mean, it would be an amazing story. An underdog story that movies are made of and, basically, movies that win Academy awards with. However, this is real life and stories, like the ones I just explained does not just fall from trees. Heartache and pain usually follow those scenarios in real life and, trust me, once I DO get in that ring you better believe heartache and pain will follow.