Empire Pro Aggression

[CUE UP: "God Is God" - Juno Reactor. Resounding boos rise from the crowd as an explosion of pyro sounds at the ramp. A moment later Tariq Ismail strides down to the ring, clad in a brownish sport coat with black and navy through it over a tight black shirt and his usual khaki slacks and his usual white and red kaffiyeh. Tucked under each arm, he carries an ABA basketball.]

TONY FATORA: Th' following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first... He hails from Mosul, Iraq... He weighs in at two hundred and forty pounds... The Is-lamic Icon... TAAAAAA-RRRRRRRIQ... IIIIIIIIIS-MAAAAAIIIILLLLLL!!!

DT: Folks, last week this man made a resounding debut here in Empire Pro Wrestling that I don't think we'll soon forget. After the way Tariq Ismail destroyed Jack Owyns, what are Foxx's chances like?

DM: What I want to know is what's up with the basketballs and the dress clothes. Doesn't look like he even expects to wrestle.

MN: Maybe he's gonna challenge Foxx to basketball!

DT: In any case, he's in the ring and calling for the microphone.

[Cut to a closer shot of Ismail, holding the basketball and standing near Tony Fatora, who holds the microphone.]

ISMAIL: Before we get thees match under way, I have sometheeng to say. Foxx... you're right. I have been selfeesh weeth my money. But I can't seemply geeve eet away or eet defeats the purpose. That ees why, tonight, een thees very reeng, I weell be hosteeng a very small challenge.

[He raises his voice.]

ISMAIL: I need two cheeldren from the audience! Two cheeldren, first ask first serve - no, not you, you're ugly. Yes, yes! Yes, you een the front row, the young man een the white, come on up here. And you, the keed een the Barney shirt. Yes, yes, come here!

[Escorted by their parents and EPW security, two children arrive at the ring and are lifted in by the guards. The first is a young Middle Eastern boy in a white T-shirt and a white and green kaffiyeh. The second is a redheaded white lad in a Barney shirt. Both are about ten years old.]

ISMAIL: Yes, yes, perfect. You, young man, what ees your name?

ARABIC KID: Manar!

ISMAIL: Yes! Yes! Manar! A good strong name for a good strong boy! And you, leettle boy, what ees your name?

WHITE KID: Billy.

ISMAIL: ...Aha.

[Ismail promptly looks out to the crowd again and tilts his shoulders out a bit, emphasizing the basketballs.]

ISMAIL: The game ees seemple, cheeldren. I have here two ABA basketballs. I weell geeve one to each of you. Wheechever one of you ees able to dreebble the basketball ten times weethout droppeeng eet weell ween one thousand dollars. You got that?

[The kids both nod, smiling brightly. Ismail wanders from the mic and hands each child a basketball, then steps back and plucks a mic from the ring agent.]

ISMAIL: Alright. Fatora, I weell keep track of Manar, you keep track of... um, the other one, whatever hees name ees. Okay, one, two, three, GO!

[And with that Manar and Billy begin dribbling. It's clear that Billy's better at it; he's bouncing the ball with much more skill, while Manar's taking his time, trying not to drop it.]

FATORA: One! Two! Three! Four! Five!

ISMAIL: Look at heem go! One! Two! Three! Four...

FATORA: Six! Seven! Eight!

ISMAIL: Come on! Five! Seex-

FATORA: Nine-

[Ismail suddenly turns and shoots a foot out, kicking Billy's ball in mid-dribble and sending it sailing into the crowd. The crowd immediately explodes, booing loudly.]

DT: WHA- WHAT A DAMN DESPICABLE THING TO DO!!

ISMAIL: Nine... ten! Oh, good work, Manar, you've won the thousand dollars, my boy!

MANAR: Hooray!

[Finding himself with nothing to dribble and with everyone in the ring but Tony Fatora ignoring him, Billy just blinks... then screws up his face and starts crying.]

BILLY: Waaaaa! N-no fair! Waaaa! Waaaaa!

[Meanwhile, Ismail hands Manar and his somewhat stunned-looking parents a wad of bills. EPW security proceed to escort the children from the ring, with Billy's parents scowling and shouting up at the wrestler as they're dragged back to their seats, but the mic misses their words. The crowd continues to make their feelings known, booing loudly.]

ISMAIL: Well, eet just goes to show you-

[The crowd's noise cuts him off.]

CROWD: BIL-LY! BIL-LY! BIL-LY! BIL-LY!

ISMAIL: Shut up! You're rooting for the loser! Only Amereecan peeg-dogs root for losers!

[Boos ensue before a new chant picks up.]

CROWD: YOU'RE A PIG-DOG! *clap clap clapclapclap* YOU'RE A PIG-DOG! *clap clap clapclapclap*

ISMAIL: I AM NOT A PEEG-DOG! YOU Amereecans are the peeg-dogs! YOU! NOT ME!

CROWD: YOU'RE A PIG-DOG! *clap clap clapclapclap* YOU'RE A PIG-DOG! *clap clap clapclapclap*

DM: Pig-dog! Pig-dog! Pig-dog!

DT: What a disgusting excuse for a human being! I can't believe Tariq Ismail would stoop so low, and neither can this crowd, and they're letting him know it!

[Ismail splutters and fumes visibly before tossing the mic aside, screaming at the crowd in anger before throwing off his coat and whipping it at the timekeeper. He's about to climb over the ropes to pick a fight - but before he can go any further, music hits the speakers. Cue up: "Angelwitch" - Angelwitch as Foxx pushes through the curtain, rushing to the ring.]

Tariq Ismail vs. Foxx

TONY FATORA: And hailing from San Antonio, Texas... Weighing in at one hundred and thirty four pounds... FFFFFFFFFFFFOXX!!!

[SFX: *DING* - Bell rings.]

DT: And Foxx is in there like a shot already, blindsiding Tariq Ismail and peppering the bigger man with right hands to the chest and face! She looks ALL fired up tonight!

DM: After the heated exchanges between these two all week you have to imagine she's pissed at how he's been mocking her - and she should be! That man is talented but he's a damn slimeball!

MN: Look at her go!

DT: Those quick jabs backing Ismail into the corner... Foxx puts a shoulder to his gut, then tries for the Irish whip, but Ismail reverses and whips her into the corner! Rushes in after her - Foxx boosts herself up and catches him with a foot to the jaw, then hops to the second turnbuckle and comes off with a clothesline!

DM: Compared to Ismail, Foxx has very little strength and weight. She's going to have to count on her speed and agility to keep him off balance here.

DT: Ismail to his feet, and Foxx in with a quick chop to the chest that stuns him a little, and more of those jabs to keep him off his feet... back into the ropes and comes back with a SPINKICK! Down goes the self-styled Islamic Icon!

MN: Good! Now bite his head off!

DM: --Mike Neely. What. You, actually NOT rooting for the people the rest of the world hates.

MN: Ismail's a jerk! I wouldn't root for him with YOUR mouth!

DM: --Ladies and gentlemen, Mike Neely.

DT: You can see that Ismail's surprised as he climbs to his feet! Foxx catches him with the Irish whip, off the ropes, Foxx up for the hurricanRANA BUT ISMAIL POWERBOMBS HER TO THE MAT AND MY GOD HE JUST ABOUT KILLED HER!

DM: OOOOOH! That was STIFF!

MN: Did you HEAR the CRASH as she came DOWN?! There's got to be a Foxx-sized dent in the ring!

DM: This is Ismail's territory now, Dave Thomas. He's got a lot more raw power and technique behind his attacks, and if he can hurt Foxx a little he can just keep the pressure on and grind her down.

DT: Foxx holding her back as she pulls herself to her feet, but Ismail comes up behind her and nails her in the back of the head with a few right hands! Now grabs her by the neck and turns... SWINGING NECKBREAKER, and a crisp one at that!

DM: Foxx is going to be in a LOT of trouble if she can't find some way to gain back the momentum from Tariq Ismail.

DT: Ismail now grabbing a fistful of hair, tossing Foxx into the corner... YELLS SOMETHING AT HER IN ARABIC and just NAILS her in the face with his elbow! Pulls her out of the corner - SUPLEX BUT FOXX FLOATS THROUGH AND THERE'S THE SCHOOLBOY!! ONE - TWO - ISMAIL KICKS OUT!

DM: That's what she's got to do! Use that quickness and try to surprise him!

MN: That was fast!

DT: Both to their feet now - Ismail kicks Foxx in the gut! Whip into the ropes - Foxx REVERSES INTO A CRADLE PIN! ONE - TWO - Ismail fights out!

DM: Another close call!

DT: A visibly frustrated Ismail to his feet - Foxx catches him with a boot to the gut! Whip into the ropes, and there's the DROPKICK and the cover! One - TWO - Ismail gets the shoulder up! Foxx pins again - One - TWO - Shoulder up!

MN: Two pins in a row!

DM: Trying to wear down Ismail before he can get up and fling her around, she is. I like it. She's got a good eye for strategy, at least.

DT: Foxx now pulling Ismail to his feet... hooks him up, tries for a suplex but can't get him up, so just whips him into the corner! Rushes in after him - BODY splash!

MN: I'd let her squish ME with that body.

DM: Except it hurts.

MN: I like it rough, Dean.

DM: ...Never say that again. My brain needs to be washed with steel wool now.

DT: Now Foxx with the whip out of the corner, sending Tariq into the opposite turnbuckles... rushes in after him but Ismail DODGES AND FOXX FLIES FACE-FIRST INTO THE TOP TURNBUCKLE!! Ismail catches her from behind - HUGE BACK SUPLEX and Foxx is REELING!!

DM: Beautiful move by Ismail! It looks like he let Foxx send him into the corner so he could catch her off-guard - usually she has trouble whipping him because he's almost twice her weight.

MN: He's smart scum!

DT: Looks like Tariq Ismail has regained the momentum as he pulls the stunned Foxx to her feet and pushes her into the corner - and there's those big elbows to the head of the San Antonio native! Hooks Foxx by the head and boosts her to the top rope!

MN: Uh-oh.

DT: Ismail climbing to the second turnbuckle... Foxx recovers enough to slug him in the head! Now Foxx hooking Ismail by the head! Signaling to the crowd!

[FOXX: TORNADO DDT!]

[CROWD: *POP!*]

DT: Oh my! This does NOT look good for Tariq Ismail!

DM: HIT HIM!

DT: FOXX BOOSTS OFF THE TOP - ISMAIL LOCKS HIS LEGS AROUND THE BUCKLE AND FOXX'S LEGS HIT THE GROUND - MY GOD, ISMAIL FLIES OFF THE SECOND TURNBUCKLE WITH A FLYING NECKBREAKER AND FOXX MIGHT AS WELL BE DEAD!!!

DM: HOLY COW!! He blocked that PERFECTLY!

DT: Ismail coming slowly to his feet and shouting at the crowd in Arabic, and listen to these fans booing their heads off! Now he's pulling Foxx up off the canvas, hooks her up... NORTHERN LIGHTS SUPLEX! Holds on... ANOTHER Northern Lights! A third, and Ismail holds on for the pin!

One -

TWO -

Foxx gets the shoulder up!

MN: That was a close one! He really flung her around there!

DT: This crowd all over Tariq Ismail as he pulls Foxx off the canvas! Whips her off into the ropes and catches her with a HUGE powerslam! Foxx holding her back as she comes to his feet - Ismail cuts across her and SCORES with the neckbreaker! The cover - one - TWO - Foxx kicks out!

DM: Ismail's really keeping the heat on right now.

DT: Ismail setting Foxx's upper back against his knee - reaches around now and cinches in a neck vice! Looks like he's going to try for the submission!

MN: He's chokin' her out!

DM: This is bad news for Foxx. She's going to have to get up and get in the air if she's going to beat Tariq Ismail right now.

DT: Foxx trying to fight out of the hold, but Ismail won't give an inch! Looks like she's starting to fade!

DM: The fans are cheering for her! They want her to get back in this thing!

DT: There's the official, raising the arm... it drops once!

MN: Twice more and it's over!

DT: Raises Foxx's arm again... it drops twice!

DM: One more!

DT: Raises the arm... NO, SHE KEEPS IT UP AND THIS CROWD IS ROARING! Foxx fights to her feet! Elbow to the gut! Another one! Another, and she kicks Ismail off! Foxx to the ropes - comes back and TAKES ISMAIL DOWN WITH THE HURRICANRANA!

DM: She's getting back into this! Go get 'em!

MN: YEAH! Go! Kick his ass!

DT: Foxx's adrenaline is starting to flow! CLOTHESLINE to Ismail! Another one! Now up to the top rope she goes - SAILS OFF WITH THE MOONSAULT PRESS AND TAKES THE BIGGER MAN DOWN! HOLDS FOR THE COVER!

ONE!

TWO!!

--NO, ISMAIL KICKED OUT!

MN: That was a BEAUTIFUL moonsault! I thought it was over!

DT: Both competitors to their feet... Foxx with the kick to the gut, and SCORES with the scissors kick! Now up to the top rope! Signalling for the Vixen Dive! These fans are on their feet!

DM: She's gonna put him away!

MN: Here it comes!

DT: FOXX OFF THE TOP ROPE!! VIXEN DIVE -- NOOOOOOO, ISMAIL ROLLED OUT OF THE WAY!!! FOXX CRASHES TO THE CANVAS IN A HEAP!!!

DM: Nooooo! She missed!

DT: Foxx went for the high-risk finishing move but Tariq Ismail wasn't ready to go down! Now Ismail's pulling himself up with the help of the ropes and this crowd is just BEGGING Foxx to get to her feet!

MN: She's got to get up! It can't end here!

DT: Ismail pulling Foxx up by the hair... she throws a punch but he just SLUGS her to her knees! Now UNDERHOOKS THE ARMS... PULLS FOXX UP... TIGER BOMB!!! FOXX COMES CRASHING DOWN TO THE CANVAS!!!

DM: Ooooh, it's gotta be over!

MN: Come on, Foxx!

DT: Now Ismail calling for the Jihad! Pulls Foxx to her feet! Hooks the head - FOXX WITH THE ELBOW TO THE SIDE!!!

DM: YEAHH!!

DT: Foxx with the Irish whip! Stops at arm's length and pulls Ismail back - CLOTHESLINE - ISMAIL DUCKS IT AND KEEPS AHOLD ON HER ARM! PULLS FOXX IN - JIHAD!!! HE HIT THE JIHAD OUT OF NOWHERE!!! THE COVER!!!

ONE!!!

TWO!!!

THREEEE!!!

[SFX: *DING* - bell rings.]

TONY FATORA: Here is your winnerrrr... TAAAA-RRRRRRIQ... IIIIIIIIS-MAAAAAIIIIILLLLLL!!!

DT: Big win for Ismail, fellas but Foxx certainly gave him a run for his money.

DM: That girl’s got talent.

MN: Yeah, talent to su…

DT: STOP. Right there. Right now.

MN: What’d I say?

DT: Folks, we're gonna go to commercial now and let Neels know what he can and can't say on the air.

MN: But I...

[Commerical for Jiggly-Puffs!]