DM: What a match!!

MN: I think I just had one.

DT: That’s disgusting!!

DM: Geez Neely, why don’t you and…you go get a room.

MN: If only I could do such a thing. I heard of this guy in Singapore who could….

DT: SO ANYWAY….up next we have JA taking on Sean Stevens, who took out his attacker Bloodhunt earlier in the evening.

DM: Stevens is a bit of an enigma right now as he’s trying to find his place around here, but we all know what JA is about. He’s just about as good as it gets in the squared circle.

DT: Let’s go up to the ring to Tony Fatora!!

TF: Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is for ONE FALL! Introducing first…

[CUE UP: “Eat the Rich” Fozzy]

TF: From Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, weighing in at 215 and three-eighths pounds...JAYYYYYY-AYYYYYEEEE! His opponent…

[CUE UP: “Patiently Waiting” No Hype Necessary]

TF: From Orlando, Florida, weighing in at 267 pounds…“TRIPLE ECKKKKSSSS” SEAN STEVENS!!!

[SFX: Bell rings]

DT: Two veterans, two accomplished champions, this one has the makings of an exciting bout.

MN: Did you just use the word “bout”? Could you be any bigger a broadcast nerd?

DM: No idea, Chandler.

DT: JA and Stevens circle…Stevens offers the hand for the lock-up, and here we go!

DM: And there we stop. Quick break by Triple X as he shoves the former IC Champ away.

DT: JA wants straight back in…shoved away with the forearm to the face by Sean Stevens. Clubs him with another, whip off the ropes…swing and a miss on the clothesline…dropkick to the knee by the Anglo Luchador! Stevens rubs the leg…off the ropes comes JA…diving shoulderblock to the right knee and Triple X flops to the mat!

DM: JA showing that ring savvy, he’s picked a spot, now watch him go to work on that right knee.

MN: Dude, he’s not THAT much bigger than him. He doesn’t need to do the whole “let’s keep the big guy off his feet” routine. It’s passé.

DT: Stevens up…JA clips that knee once again! Off the ropes from behind…BULLDOG! The former IC champ is firmly in control right here, he’s putting it right to Triple X.

MN: Yeeaaaaah!!!

DM: Huh? What the hell was that?

MN: I found a decoder ring at the bottom of my Cracker Jack box! This RULES!!!

DM: Uhhhhhh….huh.

DT: Back to the actual WRESTLING. JA waits for Stevens to rise, and meets him with a knife-edge chop. One more, and the irish whip…knee to the gut! Stevens doubled over…JA comes off the ropes…SWINGING NECKBREAKER!!! The pin…

ONE…

TWO…

EASY KICKOUT! Stevens kicks out, but JA has all the momentum on his side right now.

DM: He’s really socking it to him right now.

MN: Pithy, Deano. Verrrry pithy.

DM: This from the Cracker Jack guy.

DT: JA still on the attack, he’s got Stevens on the mat with another low dropkick to that right knee. Now, he’s…

DM: …ignoring all aspects of technical wrestling.

DT: He’s taking that right knee of Sean Stevens and just SLAMMING his kneecap straight onto the canvas! He lifts the leg again…and brings it CRASHING down!!! Up again…and down again! Sean Stevens is clutching that right knee and he is in obvious pain.

MN: Duh, Davey. What was the giveaway? The yelping, or the grabbing?

DT: The Anglo Luchador has the knee measured up…from the corner he comes…KNEE DROP…NO! Stevens pulled away at the last second, and the point of JA’s knee slammed straight into the mat! And with the height he came from, that has GOT to hurt.

MN: Thanks again, Captain Obvious.

DT: That right knee of Triple X can’t be in good shape, but JA is in pain too. JA hobbles up…big forearm by Stevens…and another! Off the ropes…HUGE CLOTHESLINE!!!
Up comes JA…CLOTHESLINE AGAIN! Up once more…chop by Stevens…hooks the head…SNAP SUPLEX! What a CRACK that made as JA’s back was sent crashing to the mat! Turns over for the pin…

ONE…

TWO…

TWO AND A QUARTER!!! JA wasn’t going to be put away by that one.

DM: Obviously not. Case in point, the match is still going on.

DT: JA’s up, but Stevens is straight back to work. He jabs at his chest roughly…hooks JA…POWERSLAM!!! He reared back and just drove his opponent straight into the canvas! You could almost see the air being forced from JA’s lungs due to the impact.

MN: But…you couldn’t.

DT: Triple X has JA in the corner…he heads to the second rope…and drops the elbow! Spiked him straight across the sternum with it! Couple more shots to the head with the forearm, and he grabs JA from behind! Dragon Sleeper applied!

DM: JA had all the energy early on in this one, this hold will cut off the airflow and slowly wear the Anglo Luchador down.

DT: He’s got that sleeper locked in, and JA is struggling but can’t really fight the hold! Stevens leans back…and he locks in a body scissors to go with the sleeper! JA is slowing getting choked out!

MN: Rock-a-bye baby…

DT: Referee Bryan Weatherby checks the arm…

ONCE…

TWICE…

THRRRRR…HE KEEPS THE ARM UP!!! JA is nearly knocked out, but he is groping for the ropes!

MN: Heheh. You said “groping”. Cool.

DM: Nice observation, Butthead.

MN: Hey, don’t call me Butthead!

DM: But…it…nevermind.

DT: JA is fighting back, regaining his strength. Stevens lets go of the scissors to crank back some more…and that’s the opening! JA pushes off and gets to the ropes, and Sean Stevens will have to break the hold. JA’s out, but Dean, that had to take a big toll on him.

DM: Well, Dave…

MN: HEY! Why do you always ask him first?

DT: Because he’s the actual wrestling expert, Neely.

MN: Oh. OHHHHHHHH.

DM: Plus, he likes me better.

DT: Damn right.

MN: Yup….HEY!!! Hey! Well, yeah.

DM: Exactly.

DT: JA’s up but worn out from that sleeper, and Triple X is on the prowl. Stevens strikes JA in the gut…hooks the head…DDT is COUNTERED!!! JA slipped out…springboard off the ropes…FLYING ELBOW!!! And JA is headed up top!!!

DM: Don’t see this as often from JA anymore, but he’s got as good an aerial arsenal as anybody.

DT: Stevens gets to his feet…JA measures him up…but Stevens dives to the ropes! JA is crotched on the top rope!

MN: You said…

DM: Dude. Just don’t go there.

DT: Stevens comes up top as well…front facelock…SUPERPLEX!!!! NO! NO! JA rolled through in midair…REVERSE DDT!!! Absolutely UNBELIEVABLE!!!

MN: Sweet ever loving HOLY HELL!!!

DT: He drapes the arm across…

ONE…

TWO…

THRRRRRRRNOOOOO!!!! Somehow, Sean Stevens got the shoulder up. I was sure that he was out!

DM: Me too.

MN: Me three!

DM: Tool.

DT: Stevens struggles his way to his feet…INSIDE CRADLE BY JA!!!!

ONE…

TWO…

NOT THIS TIME!!! Close call again, but Triple X wriggled his way free! But JA is relentless on the attack! Straight kick…and another! Stevens doubles over…JA rattles his brains with a devastating DDT! He pulls Stevens up…whips him into the corner…charges…HUGE RUNNING SPLASH!!!!

MN: Did he just take some crack or something, because I swear he couldn’t move like this a couple minutes ago.

DM: Too right.

DT: JA has placed Stevens up top. JA ascends the turnbuckles…springboards up…HURRICANRANA-NOOOOOO!!!! Stevens is now the one to change the momentum in the air, and he nailed JA with a POWERBOMB!!! Unbelievable once again! He’s got this one wrapped up!

ONE…

TWO…

THREEEE!! NO! JA got his left shoulder up at the ABSOLUTE last second. Both men have worn each other out with some phenomenal impact maneuvers in this one. Stevens with the ball in his court…standing headscissors…OOOF!!!

DM: Oof indeed.

DT: JA used the back of his head as a weapon there to give Stevens a surreptitious little low blow and escape! JA takes advantage…he wants the devastating Karelin Driver…COUNTERED AGAIN!!! Stevens bailed out! JA spins around…SUPERKICK!!! He pulls JA up, this could be it…

…IT IS!!! THE X-TERMINATOR!!! Hit it square! The pin…

ONE…

TWO…

THREEEEEE!!!! This one is in the books, an impressive win over a very tough opponent for Triple X Sean Stevens!

DM: What a big win for Sean Stevens and you know JA isn’t happy about this….

[Cut to a shot of JA slamming his fist on the mat in frustration.]

DM: …but he has absolutely nothing to be ashamed of here tonight.