(Irishred is seen making his way into the back of the arena, through the parking lot entrance. He’s muttering a lot of “for Irishred’s ears only” stuff as he rounds the corner. He walks past a pillar and falls out of the shot, but suddenly, a loud crash is heard. The camera quickly turns the corner and sees Irishred’s fallen body with someone standing over top of him. The camera scrolls up to show none other than Steven Shane, standing over Red with a chair in hand.)
Shane: I was sent to congenially tell you that Mr. Ryan’s office is closed for the night. Please come back some other time.
(Shane hovers over Red a few seconds more before stepping over the fallen Red and making his way off camera. The camera then zooms in on the out-cold Red as it fades to commercial.)
DT: Alright, Shane! Way to take a stand for EPW…
MN: Please! That was a cheap shot
DM: Did you see a cheap shot, Dave? I didn’t see a cheap shot.
DT: No cheap shot here.
MN: Marks.
[CUTTO: A match already in progress, with Nero from the Proletariat applying a hammerlock on James Irish]
DT: And it’s time for tag team action now fans. During the commercial break, all four teams made their way to the ring and had a pull apart brawl, but things have settled down now with Nero in the ring with James Irish!
DM: Now we can see if the Proletariat can go rather than just talk.
DT: Irish with a waistlock takedown. Tries floating over, but Nero quickly out of the headlock attempt. Both men back to their feet, drop-toehold by Nero, but Irish stops him applying a headlock of his own. Irish back to his feet, but Nero with a huge dropkick to the face! James Irish is down, and Nero grabbing him by the hair – BIG Russian legsweep!
MN: Not too shabby is he?
DM: He’s doing alright so far. Quick tag out though to Adam Benjamin, who comes in with a kick to the gut, as Irish is in a bit of trouble. Benjamin takes him down with a backbreaker. Quickly into the cover
One…
Two…
Kickout by Irish.
DM: And he looks in real trouble here in the early going.
DT: Benjamin making a quick tag to his partner, and now we get our first real look at Chandler Maxwell! Maxwell with a twist of the arm… HARD kick to the chest, and into a short-arm clothesline! Jake Roberts would be proud of that one, it was perfectly executed!
MN: Of course.
DT: Maxwell dropping a knee straight across the chest there, into the cover
One
Kickout. James Irish needing to make the tag, but look at that overhand wrist-lock from Chandler Maxwell! He’s controlling a much more experienced opponent with ease!
DM: To be fair to James, he had to deal with Jecht from Blitz in the brawl at the start, then Nero, then the former Intercontinental and TV champion.
MN: You hating on Maxwell?
DM: I’m saying let’s see how he handles himself against someone not already weakened.
DT: Well, there’s the tag out, bringing in the larger of the Proletariat – who’s bigger, him or Jecht?
DM: Jecht. He’s sixteen pounds heavier.
DT: And the second largest man in this match with Irish by the throat – BIG clubbing right hand takes him down! Sergeant’s looking on wanting to help his partner, who is just being taken apart out here.
DM: I think we should explain for the people at home that during the break, Irish went after Augustus, but once Jecht threw out Maxwell, he clubbed Irish from behind and delivered a snake-eyes. Irish has been a little groggy since.
DT: Speaking of Augustus, he’s picking Irish up – GORILLA PRESS! Holding him above his head… NO! James Irish slips behind, and a big reverse DDT! James Irish with his first piece of offence in a while, on a three hundred thirty pound man no-less!
MN: He won’t carry it on.
DT: James Irish getting to his feet, he looks groggy – and there’s the tag! It’s Augustus against Jecht!
DM: I hope they reinforced the ring.
DT: Jecht coming in over the top rope, and Augustus holding the back of his neck as he just waits.
DM: This could be a train wreck or something to see.
DT: Jecht now just standing in the centre of the ring – as Dean said it’s only a few pounds weight that separates these two behemoths!
MN: And Augustus is standing nose to nose with him! This doesn’t happen to a six foot eleven inch man often.
DT: Both men standing tall… and Augustus with a right hand! Jecht retaliates! Slug-fest in the middle of the ring, and neither man budging an inch! Right hands in a huge flurry, and the crowd are on their feet wondering who’s going to topple first!
DM: And Nero’s coming in!
DT: CP Nero in MAX WITH A RUNNING CLOTHESLINE! Blitz and the Proletariat going at it in the ring and the other two teams just standing there!
DM: Would you want to get in between Jecht and Augustus?
DT: The referee is trying to, as Jecht with a knee lift. Irish whip across the ring, Max coming to his aid and a BIG double back body drop! Nero coming back, taken down by a big boot from Jecht! Max picking up Augustus, but Augustus with a right to the gut. Clubbing blows to the back of Nero and Max respectively, and both men thrown to the outside!
MN: Well that was fun.
DT: Jecht turns round and a BIG clothesline from Augustus takes him to the mat! Augustus not letting the bigger man to his feet, picking him up and a BIG slam down there!
DM: Any time you get a man that size being slammed it’s going to be a big slam.
DT: Augustus with a falling headbutt to the skull of Jecht there, and he tags out to Chandler Maxwell. Maxwell in, can he continue the dominance he showed over Irish Red earlier?
DM: Who knows? He’s stomping away at the knee of Jecht though, which is a smart move against a man his size. Take away the knee and they don’t have a lot to go on.
MN: Or a leg to stand on HA HA!
DT: Droll. Maxwell taking Jecht by the leg, pulling him to the centre of the ring – and there’s a spinning toehold! Jecht pounding the mat, and Maxwell with another spinning toe-hold!
DM: Shades of Ted DiBiase there, repeating it in quick succession – holding it hurts and can wear the bodypart down, but repeating it is a bit quicker because of the initial pull it gives.
DT: And driving the elbow down into the side of the leg!
MN: Trained by the best, he’s almost as good as his cousin.
DT: Maxwell’s good, no doubt about that. Maxwell back up, still holding the leg – going for a figure NO! Jecht just POWERED him off into the ropes with one leg! Maxwell off the ropes, over Jecht on the canvas – Jecht back to his feet, and Maxwell tries a shoulder block! No budge from the big man!
DM: OK, that was a daft thing to do.
DT: Maxwell looking at Jecht, runs back to the ropes TILTAWHIRL SLAM BACKBREAKER! Did you see how quickly Jecht spun him around?!
One!
TWO!!
Adam Benjamin in to break up the pinfall! Pride is all that’s at stake right now, but you’ve got to think that Dan Ryan’s paying close attention to this match to decide who gets the next title shot at the Highland Park Social Club.
MN: Which is kinda bull, Blitz should’ve had the rematch already!
DM: I don’t know what the contract said. Surprised Leonard didn’t insist on it, but then Farnswirth’s lawyers might have put in extra clauses too.
DT: Jecht just yanking Maxwell to his feet, and there’s the tag to Nero – and a glare at Augustus!
DM: It’ll be interesting in future to see these two teams, Blitz and Proletariat, go at it – I don’t think Jecht was satisfied with their exchange earlier.
DT: Nero in though, and goes straight to work on the back of the Englishman, hard forearm shot to the kidney! Maxwell down to his knees in pain - that backbreaker from Jecht did a lot of damage – and Nero OUCH!
DM: Very painful move that one – almost a dragon sleeper, but bending Maxwell back across his knee to put pressure right on the spine!
DT: Can Maxwell get out of this one?
MN: Nope, he’s part of the Ninety Nine club.
DT: And I thought Akita was the one able to predict the future.
DM: Please… don’t mention that name, it’s almost as vile as Hans the Viking.
MN: Or the Monkey-boy.
DT: Regardless, Maxwell is in a lot of pain in there, but he’s refusing to give in! Nero releasing the hold, and a stiff shot to the chest!
One…
TWO!!
Kickout by Maxwell!
DM: And Nero brings him quickly up to a seated position, and the tag made to Augustus. Keep the man in, don’t let him make a tag, and one team will be eliminated sooner rather than later.
DT: And a hard kick to the spine before Nero leaves us – it’s looking bad for the Saviours right now.
MN: They’ll pull through.
DM: You know, with three teams Mike likes in there, I’m surprised his split loyalties aren’t causing him to go schizophrenic.
MN: We are not amused.
DT: Yes, Queen Victoria. Back in the ring, Augustus picking up Maxwell, up onto the shoulder… BACK BREAKER!
One!
TWO!
Benjamin in to break up the three count! Not sure if that was needed, but better to be safe than sorry I guess.
DM: Well, Maxwell did kick out as well, but Benjamin’s a veteran, he made sure.
DT: Augustus picking the smaller man up, there’s the tag back to Nero. Irish whip across the ring – DOUBLE hip-toss. The referee ushering Augustus out of the ring, and look at Nero with the blatant choke hold!
MN: Behind the referee’s back, smart man.
DT: Releases it as the ref turns round, a cover
TWO!!
Kickout again by the Brit. He’s been on the receiving end of punishment since Jecht was in there.
DM: If he’s smart he’ll look to tag out to the Sergeant, I don’t recall seeing him in the match so far.
DT: Nero driving the point of the knee in between the shoulders as he pulls back on the chin of Maxwell – this has got to hurt the back some more.
DM: It does. Pretty much all the focus has been on the back since Jecht left the ring, and it’s probably a very smart strategy to focus on it after that impact. You’ve got three hugely powerful men in this match, and if two of them have focused on the back, then it’s going to be tender.
DT: Maxwell though trying to force the hands off his chin – forcing them up… slowly! He’s getting there… clubbing forearm to the back of the head there! Nero with the pick up – BRAINBUSTER!
One!
TWO!!
THNO! Adam Benjamin in to break up the three count as we almost had our first elimination tonight!
DM: And look at Augustus shouting at Benjamin, taunting him almost.
MN: All he’s saying is Benji’s cousin hasn’t got a chance.
DT: Maybe, maybe not, but there’s an abdominal stretch applied by Nero right in his own corner. Tag back to Augustus, and a HUGE double axe handle across the ribs! Augustus with Maxwell, hard right to the jaw, and the shove back into the corner! Shot to the ribs, and there’s another tag – the Proletariat taking firm control in this match.
DM: I don’t know how smart this is though, you’ve got the former tag team champions who are going to be fresh, and Sergeant and Irish aren’t slouches – keeping those four men on the outside resting isn’t what I’d do.
MN: But you’re retired, Dean, and they know what they’re doing.
DT: Regardless, Augustus has Maxwell up in a gorilla press. Nero in, drops to one knee… gutbuster NO! Maxwell with a rake of the eyes of Augustus, and a dropkick sending him into his partner! He’s got the chance to tag out!
DM: Go for it!
DT: Maxwell on his knees, crawling slowly… inching his way over as Augustus is getting to his feet, he’s groggy after hitting his head on the second turnbuckle… THERE’S THE TAG! Adam Benjamin is back in the ring, and a HUGE clothesline as he slingshotted himself over the top rope! Adam Benjamin with a right hand to Nero, clubbing away as the Augustus rolls to the outside. Benjamin with the Irish whip, Nero ducks under the clothesline… BIG Mexican armdrag! Benjamin with the cover
One!
TWO!!
NO! Still no pinfall in this match!
MN: Tag in Blitz, they’ll clear the ring.
DM: I’ve got to agree with Mike, tagging in a fresher team would be a good idea about now.
DT: Benjamin not choosing to make the tag, picking Nero up again – thumb to the eye! Nero regaining control, driving the knee to the gut, Irish whip… AUGUSTUS PULLS DOWN THE TOP ROPE!
MN: SCORE!
DT: Augustus on the outside – and Maxwell comes in and yanks him off the apron!
DM: I knew it was a bad idea having those two teams on the same side of the ring.
DT: Chandler Maxwell is just laying into Augustus, as Nero comes over… PLANCHA!
DM: Nero, Maxwell and Augustus are down! Benjamin picking up the smaller member of the Proletariat, and sends him face first into the apron!
DT: Adam Benjamin taking his time, slugging away on Nero, but Nero’s giving as good as he gets! Augustus getting back to his feet, and the double team on the outside! Both men hammering away on the former Intercontinental and TV Champion, BUT MAXWELL WITH A SHOT TO THE RIBS OF NERO! All four men are fighting near the rampway… BIG belly to belly overhead on Augustus!
MN: They better watch the count.
DT: Maxwell and Nero trading right hands, as Benjamin has Augustus by the legs, attempted slingshot… NO! Augustus with a double-footed push away
[SFX: dingdingding]
DT: What was that?
TONY FATORA: The referee has counted out both teams – the PROLETARIAT and SAVIOURS OF WRESTLING have BOTH BEEN ELIMINATED!
MN: WHAT?!
DM: You did say they should watch the count. I think they just got too caught up in it out there, you can see Blitz, Sergeant and Irish just staring at them.
MN: And the four cowards didn’t get involved?!
DM: Why should they, they want to win this match. Blitz did go an entire elimination match not entering the ring until they were one of the last two teams, remember?
DT: Well, security is trying to get those two teams separated AND BLITZ WITH A SNEAK ATTACK AS IRISH AND SERGEANT WEREN’T EVEN LOOKING!
MN: HAW-HAW!
DM: Max and Jecht being smart and keeping their focus solely on this match, bringing both their remaining opponents into the ring.
DT: Max with a clubbing forearm to the head of Irish, as look at the power of Jecht! He’s got Sergeant up in a gorilla press above his head! Irish sent into the corner, driving elbow by Max, Jecht telling his partner to move… JAVELIN THROW! Sergeant thrown like he’s nothing straight into his partner!
MN: What an innovative move!
DT: Leonard Johnson looking pleased as Max leaves the ring, and Jecht picking up Sergeant – big scoop slam there by the near three hundred fifty pounder.
One
TWO!
Nope, Sergeant, the freshest man in this match, with an easy kickout, but Erin looks concerned, as Blitz are in complete control.
DM: That’s the difference, experience wise, between these two teams – Irish and Sergeant were too busy watching the melee on the outside, and that left them wide open for an attack.
DT: Jecht tossing Sergeant back into the corner, and there’s the tag to Max. Max in, driving a fist into the exposed ribs, and we’re probably going to see a lot of double teaming happening now from the former tag team champions as they try and isolate one man. Max now, side headlock applied on the smaller man, and that’s got to feel like a vice, look at the size of those arms on the big German.
DM: It’s a tight grip, but not an unbreakable one.
DT: Sergeant trying to pry himself out of the hold, but no deal. Trying to force the big man back to the ropes, but just look how powerful Max is, leading him back to the centre of the ring!
MN: This’ll be over soon.
DT: Could very well be, as Max releases the hold and just LEVELS him with a clothesline! Picking him back up, Irish whip across the ring, Sergeant under the big boot
DM: Blind tag!
DT: Sergeant slides through the legs of Max… NICE double team by Irish and Sergeant there! Max turning didn’t see Irish come in with a tackle to the knee, and Sergeant with a quick dropkick takes the big man down! James Irish in off the blind tag, and he’s just stomping away at the knee of Max! Shades of Chandler Maxwell against Jecht earlier!
DM: Because against men that size it’s the safest course of action, they can’t use their power so well from the canvas.
DT: Irish DRIVING the knee into the inside of Max’s, and just watch him wrenching back there! He’s trying to pop the knee right out of its socket!
DM: And Jecht in with a kick to the back of the head to save his partner – you could hear Max in a lot of pain there.
DT: The referee sending Jecht back to his corner, as James Irish makes the tag to Sergeant. Irish and Sergeant with a leg each.
MN: Make a wish!
DT: Max’ll be feeling that in the morning, as the Sergeant sits him up, and takes him down with a dropkick to the chest!
One…
TWO!!
No, powerful kickout there by the German. Sergeant though not looking perturbed, keeping his cool, and he just LEVELS Max with a running clothesline! Goes over to his corner, another tag in, holding the leg of Max – and THERE’S some nice teamwork from Sergeant and Irish, as James Irish comes in over the top rope and squashes the knee!
DM: All of this focus on the knee, they’ve just got to make sure Jecht doesn’t get the tag in. The fan-favourites in firm control though.
DT: James Irish dragging Max to the centre of the ring… FIGURE FOUR! James Irish with the move that beat Blitz at the last Wrestleverse!
DM: But Jecht is wisely in very quickly. That was a smart move, as those high-impact shots to the knee must have already done a lot of damage.
DT: The referee again forcing Jecht to the outside, as Leonard Johnson is trying to rouse Max to make the tag, and Erin is egging on her men to go for the kill! There’s another tag, and Sergeant back in again. Double Irish Whip, Max under the double clothesline, ducks another one… and takes both men down with a clothesline of his own!
MN: Come on, Max, make the tag!
DT: Max very slow getting back to his feet there, but he’s already facing his partner, and the big, long reach those two men have brings Jecht back into this thing! Max going over to Irish now, Jecht with Sergeant, forcing them back to opposite corners… checking, double Irish whip… NO collision as they doe-cee-doe, coming back, Sergeant TAKEN OUT OF HIS BOOTS BY THE BOOT OF JECHT!
DM: But James Irish with a crossbody block on Max!
DT: Jecht picking Sergeant up as James Irish is just laying into Max on the far side – SNAKEEYES by the big man!
MN: Turn around! Listen to your manager!
DT: Jecht now noticing that James Irish is in control of Max, Jecht coming over… HUGE kick to the back of the head! Jecht now with James Irish up by the throat… DOUBLE hand choke slam there, tossing James Irish down in the centre of the ring! Max now back to his feet, Jecht with an Irish whip on Irish. James ducks under the lariat from Jecht, on the rebound
MN: DOUBLE FLAPJACK!
DT: Blitz using their height and combined strength there, did you see how high James Irish flew into the air?! The referee trying to regain some semblance of order, as Jecht pointing to the ropes… could it be?
DM: He’s gearing for it, listen to the crowd jeering!
DT: Jecht off the ropes, over Irish, leaps up OH MY GOD! The Sergeant from the ring apron just LEVELLED Jecht with a right hand, stopping the MASSIVE Asai Moonsault attempt from the big man!
DM: That would have been it had it hit.
DT: Max coming over, but Sergeant with a sunset flip!
ONE!!
TWO!!
NO!! Kickout by the German!
MN: He’s not even the legal man!
DT: I don’t think the referee’s taking any notice of that right now. Jecht and James Irish are very slowly trying to get to their feet, they’re definitely winded, as Sergeant doubles Max over with a knee to the gut… DDT takes him down! Sergeant’s pointing at the top rope!
DM: Big move coming.
DT: The Sergeant, leaving the safety of the ground, waiting for Max to get to his feet… no! Jecht just shook the top rope and Sergeant crotched on the top turnbuckle!
MN: That won’t please Erin.
DT: Last time I checked, Jecht and Sergeant were the legal men. Jecht now with a hard right hand, that huge fist just crashing against the skull of Sergeant – setting him up… JAVELIN toss across the ring!
DM: But James Irish stops him from following up by clotheslining Jecht to the outside! James Irish and Jecht on the outside, Max getting back to his feet on the inside!
DT: Sergeant back up to a knee – BIG chop to slow him down. James Irish and Jecht are fighting on the outside, Max with Sergeant set up… BIG scoop slam!
ONE!!
TWO!!
THRENO!! Sergeant BARELY getting the shoulder up there!
DM: It doesn’t take many blows from men Max or Jecht’s size to hurt you, that’s why big men can be so dangerous!
DT: Looks like Max is calling for the end of the match, as James Irish sends Jecht headfirst on the whip into the steel steps!
DM: Leonard’s not looking happy!
DT: Max with Sergeant up by the hair, backs him against the ropes, and a right hand for luck! Irish whip across, Max off the ropes… MAXIMUM IMPACT!!
MN: It’s over!
DT: Even on that injured knee, Max SOMEHOW manages to elevate himself up and over to deliver that somersault neck breaker! Max going for the cover
DM: But the referee’s distracted with Erin!
DT: Erin is up on the ring apron distracting the referee! Leonard Johnson coming round the ring as Max sees what’s going on, he’s yelling at Erin to get down!
DM: You just don’t want to know WHAT he’s yelling at her!
DT: Leonard Johnson grabbing Erin down off the apron – SLAP BY ERIN! The referee going to the outside, trying to separate the two managers… BULLDOG by Irish! James Irish dragging Max to the corner, climbing the ropes… FUKN NUMBER FORTY NINE! That top rope somersault legdrop right across the throat of the big German, and he’s just draped Sergeant across him!
MN: NO!
DT: The referee turns round as Irish hightails it to the outside, kick to Jecht
ONE!!
TWO!!
THREE!! THREE!! SERGEANT AND IRISH WITH THE UPSET!!
[SFX: ding ding ding ding]
TONY FATORA: Ladies and gentlemen, the winners of the tag team elimination match… JAMES IRISH and THE SERGEANT!!
(CUT TO: Dan Ryan and “Sensational” Steven Shane in the center of the ring.)
SS: "Dan and I told all of you that I would take care of Irishred once and for all. No one is going to come into this federation and destroy it. Irishred, you are done. Cut your losses and go on home to ****splat, South Dakota. You are way out of your league here. You never stood a chance in hell of doing anything but making a fool of yourself. Mr. Ryan has made you look the fool at every turn. Every one of us has been in the back laughing at you as your big plans fall to crap each and every week. You're a nobody. You're nothing. You're...
(“Bad Company” by Bad Company blares over the loudspeakers. A bloody Irishred runs down the rampway. He slides under the ring ropes and jumps up immediately. He launches himself at Dan Ryan and Steven Shane. Ryan quickly slides out of the ring, but Shane stands firm in the line of fire. Red takes Steven to the mat and begins pummeling him. Ryan starts yelling for security. Irishred lifts Steven Shane up and nails him with his version of a full nelson slam Black Water. Irishred then climbs to the top rope and comes flying off with Cold Shot, a knee to Steven Shane's kidneys. Red rolls Steven out of the ring and calls for a microphone. )
Irishred: RYAN!!! Stop right there, you coward. I've had it with you. I'm gonna hurt you for real. I'm gonna hit you where it hurts the most. I'm going to strip you of your vaunted power. Your abuse stops here. I'm laying down a challenge, big man. You and I for control of EPW. You step your ass into the ring and face me man to man. No more joke acts. No more world tour. No more of your hiding. Prove to the whole world that you're not afraid of me. Prove to the whole world that you truly are the better man. Do your own ****ing work for once. Step into the ring with me and put your control on the line. I lose...I leave. You're rid of me...it's that easy. All you have to do is beat me Dan. All you have to do is put my shoulders to the mat for three seconds, something you have NEVER done. I win - you give up control of EPW to me. What do you say chump?
(Ryan looks on sternly at Irishred for a few moments, then gestures to someone at ringside for a microphone)
Ryan: First and foremost, Loverboy – you’re not welcome in this arena tonight.
(Ryan makes a gesture toward the back – a few moments later 15-20 security officers come filing down the ramp)
Ryan: But I’ll spare you the embarrassment of your arrest for about thirty seconds, so that I can answer your little challenge. The answer of course – is no.
(The crowd boos, but Irishred smiles and raises the microphone to his mouth again)
Irishred: Not man enough, eh? I always took you for a coward, Ryan. And all the security? Don’t worry. I don’t plan on staying too long anyway. I kinda needed to take a leak before heading back home. Hey, isn’t your daughter’s gravesite somewhere around here?
(A loud “OHHHHH” comes from the crowd and Dan Ryan’s face turns to STONE.)
MN: Holy Crap….
DM: Um, I’m kinda scared to move right now.
(Ryan slowly lifts the microphone to his mouth.)
Ryan: No match, Red. But I’ll do you one better. I don’t wrestle in my own company, but I do throwdown the occasional street fight. You and me, street fight at Wrestleverse. And by the way, I’m not stupid enough to turn my company over to you permanently. So specifically, if you win you run things – but only for six months. Take it or leave it. And if you leave it – you leave here in a f**kin’ body bag.
(Irishred smiles once again)
Irishred: You got it.
(Ryan frowns and gestures to the security in the ring, who gang tackle Irishred and ever so-not-gently cuff him up and drag him up the ramp)
DT: Wow! It’s a street fight at Wrestleverse! Can you believe it?
DM: I still can’t believe that crack Irishred made.