DT: Alright fans, our next match here on UNLEASHED features a bevy of guys who most would agree are right on the cusp of big things here in Empire Pro.
DM: No doubt about it, Dave. Cameron Cruise may have the greatest tag team resume of anybody in EPW, not to mention some big time solo gold. Hart is a former world champion, both in NEW and WFW. Hiroshi has held gold in the old GXW, the CSWA, and elsewhere. The Crimson Calling have been champions and are undoubtedly one of the best tag teams we've seen in recent years, not only here but in other circuits around the globe and Olvir, well.... there's only one Olvir.
MN: Thank God.
DM: But what I'm saying here, Neels, is that despite the fact that this isn't a main event match-up, it's a big bout, with a lot of talent, and possible title implications down the road.
DT: I think we can all agree on that, but guys - one has to wonder if the Crimson Calling and Olvir are truly ready for a force like Hart, Hiroshi, and Cruise.
DM: They're pros, Dave. They'll be more than ready when that bell rings, but you are correct about the danger presented by their opponents. Kin and Cruise have looked like men on a mission in recent weeks, and now with SJH joining their cause, things just may have reached a combustible state. Just look at what they did to Stalker and Nakita on Aggression.
MN: Come now..they just want that R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Is that so wrong?
[CUE UP: "Who Want It" by Trick Trick, featuring Eminem. CUT TO: The entryway as the arena begins to buzz.]
DT: If you ask me, all they've done so far is lose what respect they had with their heinous actions, but at any rate, they put down the challenge, Olvir and company answered, and the time for the match is NOW!
[The pyro beings to blaze as SJH shoots out from behind the curtain like a cannonball, followed by Cruise and Hiroshi who walk confidently in stride. The fans respond with a LOUD but mixed chorus of opinions while the three make their march toward the ring.]
TF: The following SIX-MAN MATCH is scheduled for ONE FALL - Introducing first... the team of SHAAAWN HART, KIIIIN HIROSHI, and CAMERON... CRUUUUUUUUIIISEE!!
[Almost in tandem, the three men slide into the ring, after which Cruise and Hiroshi rush to opposite corners and perch themselves atop the turnbuckles. Meanwhile Hart takes a spot center ring and delivers his trademark 'Elvis Pelvis' dance.]
DT: Again, Cruise and Hiroshi have already begun to make their mark here in EPW, but for Shawn Hart... this will be the first time we've seen him in the ring since the first round of the Kings of the Cage tourney.
DM: In a match against two of his opponents here tonight no less, so I would gather that the Phenom wants at least some measure of revenge to come out of this thing.
MN: Pshh.. if it wasn't for that rube Fusenshoff, Hart would've come out of that thing a winner, I'm telling you!
DT: It's also worth noting that Olvir was the man responsible for knocking Hart out of the TEAM Invitational tournament this past spring after he had reached the Final Four the previous year, so the Phenom definitely has something to prove in this comeback match.
DM: There's a lot of history between all of these men, but at the Unleashed press conference, Cruise made it clear he wanted some competition. Needless to say, I think that wish has been granted.
MN: We'll just see about that.
[Eminem's hard-hitting vocals fade to silence. Seconds later, "I Am A Viking" by Yngwie Malmsteen’s Rising Force hits the PA, bringing the fans in attendance instantly to their feet.]
TF: And THEIR OPPONENTS..... the team of EEERIK BLACK, IIIIVAN DALKICHEV, and OOOOOOOOOOLVIIIR AAAAAARSSVINNAAAAAARRR!!!
[With his mead horn in tow, Olvir STORMS out onto the rampway flanked by the Crimson Calling. With the fans going crazy all around them, Olvir begins to swing his battle axe round and round over his head, while Dalkichev takes a swig from a bottle of vodka, SMASHES the battle on the ground before them, then turns to his partner and begins to shout.]
MN: Seriously... look at these jokers.
DM: Mikey, you doth protest too much.
DT: They've been called Chronic Collizion, they've been called the Crimson Calling, call them what you want, Erik Black and Ivan Dalkichev have set the standard in today's tag division if you ask me...
DM: And Olvir's star has CONTINUED to do nothing but rise since his return to the sport. You talk about Hart's Final Four appearance in TEAM in '07, well Olvir made it to the Final Four in '08!
DT: There appeared to be some reluctance on Olvir's part to forge this union with Black and Ivan at the press conference, so we'll have to see how that shakes out, but on paper we've got all the ingredients here, guys.
[Olvir is the first to enter the ring, hitting his usual spot just outside the ropes. Meanwhile Black and Dalkichev get into a shouting match with their opponents.]
DM: Gamesmanship from both sides here. These guys want to get it on!
[Fatora steps out of the ring as the official signals for the bell. Hiroshi and Hart conference in their corner while Ivan and Cruise step out to start the match.]
DT: The official has called for the bell, the match is ON, and... just like that, Ivan is RUSHING Cruise! Dalkichev NAILING Cameron Cruise with jabs, there's a back elbow to the temple, another hard jab, and now a stiff kick to the midsection!
MN: Ivan going KGB all over his ass!
DT: Ivan CONTINUES the barrage of strikes, Cruise has yet to get a foothold in this match... and now he’s tied up by Ivan. Ivan Dalkichev backing him into the corner-
[SMACK!]
DM: Yeeouch!
DT: Ivan just PASTED his hand print across the chest of Cruise with an overhead chop! Cruise is staggering forward now, clinching his chest in pain! Cameron saunters into the middle of the ring - and Ivan's got his wrist… Ivan with the Irish whip - here comes Cruise back the other waaaaaay... SPINEBUSTER by Ivan!!! Down goes Cruise!! QUICK COVER BY IVAN....
ONE...........
TWOOO..........
HIROSHI WITH THE SAVE!!
MN: Ohhh my. Too close.
DT: After some admonition from the official, Hiroshi returns to his corner. Meanwhile here's a quick tag on the other side and Erik Black has entered the ring. The Escape Artist has Cruise by the neck, he's propping him up, and tossing him off toward the ropes for the second time! Back the other way now, here's Cruise... Black revving up - spinning back fist to Cruise and he's on Dream Street!
MN: What's next? Maybe he'll whoop him like a government mule... or a scalded dog perhaps?
DT: Cruise sent stumbling back into his corner as a result, where Kin Hiroshi alertly slaps his back with a blind tag!
DM: Good move by Erik, but he needs to be aware of just where he's at in the ring. Now they've got the Muffin Man on there hands.
MN: Fresh out da oven, yo!
DT: In comes Kin Hiroshi … but Black catches him with a Judo strike to the midsection! Hiroshi is doubled over in pain, prompting Black to hit the ropes - and here's a big knee right to the face of Hiroshi!! Erik looks to continue the assault, but Kin recovers quickly and catches Black with a fist to the face! Hiroshi taking charge now with fist after fist… now he looks to be setting Black up for the supleeeeeeeeex... no! Black with the float over... and now an elbow to the brow ridge of Kin Hiroshi!
[CUT TO: A quick shot of Hart shouting something to Hiroshi.]
DM: The Phenom looks to be giving Hiroshi some words of encouragement and guys, his team needs it. The Crimson Calling are imposing their will.
DT: Hiroshi is trying to rub cobwebs off, but Erik Black is ascending the turnbuckle! He hops to the second rope … Hiroshi has his wits, he turns to face the Escape Artist… but Black CONNECTS with a leaping shoulder block! Here's the cover…
ONE…
TWO...
Kickout on two! Black wastes no time in finding his feet and tagging his partner back in as Hiroshi is laid out on the mat.
DM: This is why these guys have been such an effective tag team. They've come into this thing with a strategy and they're sticking to it.
DT: Black and Dalkichev have been in the driver's seat throughout this match-up, we've yet to see Hart or Olvir, but right now Ivan is laying in with some quick boots to the back of Hiroshi's head. Ivan Dalkichev... pulling Kin back to his feet now and WHIPPING him into the corner! Ivan backs into the ropes to gather some momentum - and there's HART rushing over and throwing a fist into Ivan's back! Ivan turns to Hart, ready to counter, but the Phenom hops down to the concrete...
DM: Ohp, look out.
[SMACK!!!]
DT: Ivan turns his attention back to his opponent in the ring only to catch a BIG dropkick from a recovered Kin Hiroshi! Down goes Dalkichev... and here's Hiroshi right down after him with the pinfall attempt-
ONE......
TWO.....
No.
DM: It's always good to go for the win, but Ivan has yet to take a big blow in this match. No surprise he was able to kick out there.
DT: Hiroshi is back to his feet.. and he's pulling Ivan along with him. HARD fist to the chin of Ivan now. And another........ and a THIRD shot to the chin from Hiro sending Ivan back against the ropes.
MN: As is also the case with sex, three heads are better than one.
DM: Come again?
MN: That's what she said.
DM: O-K... but I don't get your comparison.
MN: Oy... are you really that lame-headed? Three heads, y'know... like a threesome? Hiroshi punched him three times? Ya get it?
DM: That's a bit of a reach, bud. Even for you.
[CRASH!!!]
DT: If you two would be so kind as to allow the PAY-PER-VIEW to interrupt this intellectually thrilling discourse for just a moment... after being whipped off the ropes by Hiroshi, Dalkichev ducked a clothesline coming back the other way and has now followed it up with a swinging neckbreaker and Kin Hiroshi is DOWN.
DM: Apologies Mr. Thomas. Nice move by the Russian.
DT: Ivan... looking to extend the onslaught. He's reaching down for Kin's - WAIT A MINUTE! SMALL PACKAGE BY HIROSHI!
ONE!
TWOOOO!!!
KICKOUT ON TWO!!
MN: He almost had 'im!
DT: Ivan is pulling himself up by the ropes, but Hiroshi looks to be moving towards his corner. Cruise has his hand out and.... yes, there's the tag and Cruise is back in the ring! On the other side, Ivan has found his feet and THERE HE GOES! Ivan is rushing Cruise, here's a clothesline attempt, but Cruise ducks it! Ivan quick to recover, but CRUISE is quicker with a knife-edge chop!!
[The crowd lets out a boisterous "WHOOOOOOOO!!!"]
DT: Cruise revving back and CONNECTING with a second chop!!
["WHOOOOOOOOOO!!!"]
DT: That last shot sends Ivan back into turnbuckle on Cruise's corner, and SJH wastes no time in SMACKING Ivan in the back of the head! And there's Hiroshi following suit! Ivan is getting TRIPLE TEAMED! The official is trying to squeeze his way between the men and put a stop to the skirmish, but to no avail! Hart, Hiroshi and Cruise are PUMMELING Ivan!
DM: This is so blatant it's almost unbelievable... and here's the official finally initiating the count.
DT: The fans are voicing their disapproval, but... HOLD THE PHONES-
[The crowd's jeers are instantaneously morphed to cheers.]
DT: OLVIR IS IN THE RING!
MN: That's one angry Scandinavian.
DT: Olvir's had enough!! He's STORMING toward the corner... but there's the referee to block his path! Hart and Hiroshi backed off just enough to free his attention and divert him to Olvir!
DM: Cruise, Kin, and SJH showing their ring savvy.
DT: Olvir is PLEADING with the official.. and Black is looking to jump into the ring as well, but the referee won't have it! His only concern is keeping Olvir and the Escape Artist out of the ring. Meanwhile, Hart and Hiroshi are holding Ivan by the arms and Cameron Cruise drives a STIFF kick into Ivan's ribs!
DM: And there's another one for good measure. Wow... that one looked like it did some serious damage! Look at how Ivan is slumping over now.
DT: Olvir and Black are back in there corner and the official has returned his attention to Cruise and Ivan in the corner, but Hart and Hiroshi have already released their clutches. Cameron Cruise edges in and here's an Irish whip. There goes Ivan... and Cruise catches him with a spinning back kick! Down goes Dalkichev and Cruise takes off toward the ropes, catches a full head of steam… and drops a HARD elbow directly into Ivan's sternum! Cruise going for the pin.... wait - scratch that. It looked like Cameron was going to go for the pinfall, but it looks as if he's balked now and wants to dish out some more pain!
DM: These guys have a serious mean streak goin'.
DT: Cruise has Ivan up, he moves in to scoop him up for a slam... BUT IVAN JABS HIM RIGHT IN THE EYES!! Cruise instantly releases his hold and puts his hands to his eyes!
MN: That cheating bastard!!
DM: I guess Ivan's decided to fight fire with fire.
DT: Dalkichev is definitely showing the wear after that three-way beating, but he's got Cruise on the ropes after that poke to the eye! The official is giving him a warning now, but turnabout is fair play.
DM: Without question.
DT: Ivan moving in now and throwing a fist, but Cruise blocks it! Here's Cruise now with a left jab! Cruise throws a second, but now it's Ivan stopping his fist cold! Ivan grasps Cruise by the wrist and goes for the whip - NO! reversal by Cruise! Here's Ivan coming off the ropes... and he LEAPFROGS Cruise, who was going for the back body drop! Dalkichev off the ropes... and now he ducks a back elbow attempt!! Ivan off the ropes again aaaaaaaaaaand...
[THUD!!]
DM: DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE! Both men are down!!
DT: A lot of back and forth action during that exchange, but both men are on the canvas after that double clothesline!! The referee begins the ten count...
DM: Well, he may be counting, but I don't think either of these guys are completely out. Look at Cruise... he's already pulling himself toward his corner.
[The fans in attendance begin to clap, stomp, and cheer as they attempt to will Ivan into his corner.]
DT: And now Ivan is making the slow crawl to HIS corner! It's a race to see who can get the fresh man in first! Hart's hand is out! Olvir is reaching for his partner as well! WHO'S GONNA GET THE TAG?! Cruise is reaching.... but he's not quite close enough! Ivan is still struggling to get there, but Olvir is leaning over that top rope, trying DESPERATELY to reach his partner!
[SLAP!]
MN: WHOOOO!!!
DT: CRUISE HAS THE TAG!! SHAWN HART HOPS OVER THAT TOP ROPE AND IS IN THE RING!! THE PHENOM IS READY TO POUNCE ON IVAN LIKE A TIGER-
[SLAP!]
DT: BUT IVAN GETS A BURST OF ENERGY AND LEEEEEAPS INTO HIS CORNER, TAGGING OLVIR!!
DM: LOOK AT HART!! The very SIGHT of Olvir entering the ring knocked him on his ASS!!
DT: Here comes Olvir and the fans are ON THEIR FEET!! Hart is retreating back to his corner like a COWARD, but OLVIR'S GOT HIM BY THE HAIR!!
MN: NOOOOOO!!!
DT: The former Television Champion turns to face Olvir now and there's a European Uppercut, but Olvir's still got the hair!! That punch had no effect on the big man!! Hart with left hook...NOTHING. A slap to the face... NOTHING!!
DM: And now Olvir is SMILING at Shawn Hart!!
DT: Hart has been struck dumb now with fear - Olvir's STILL got 'im by the hair!! He's winding up his free arm now, aaaaaaaand...
[THUD!]
DT: OLVIR POUNDS HIS FIST INTO HART'S HEAD LIKE A MALLET!! The impact sent Shawn spinning... and as he stumbles back around toward Olvir, the Norseman's GOT HIM IN HIS CLUTCHES!! OLVIR... HOISTING THE PHENOM UP.....
[CRAAAAAAAAAAASHH!!!]
DT: .....aaaand PLANTING HIM WITH THE BERZERKER BOMB! HART IS OUT LIKE A LIGHT, AND OLVIR FALLS OVER HIM!! THE REF IS THERE-
OOOOOONE.....
TWOOOOOOOOOOOO....
[Suddenly, all the lights go out and the arena becomes PITCH BLACK!!]
MN: WHAT THE HELL?!
DM: WOW! What a time for power failure...
DT: Fans, Olvir Arsvinnar looked to have this match won, but the house lights have gone out! As you can see, we're in complete darkness here!
MN: So does Olvir win?! What gives?
DT: Well.... wow.... I'm not quite sure what to make of this, but uh-
[SMAAAACK!!!]
DM: What in heaven's name was that?!
DT: Something is going on in the ring! The lights are out, but something is definitely going-
[SMAAAACK!!!]
MN: There it is again!!
[Without warning or explanation, the power is returned to the lights and JARED WELLS is standing in the center of the ring with a steel chair!!]
MN: OH.... MY.... GOD!!
[Seemingly every man, woman, and child in attendance is dumbfounded.]
DT: IT'S JARED WELLS!! IT'S JARED WELLS!! THE CRIMSON CALLING HAS BEEN LEVELED AND NOW-
[SMAAAAACK!!!]
DM: OOOOOOOOOHH!!
DT: WELLS CLOBBERS OLVIR WITH THE STEEL CHAIR!!! The official is calling for the bell... and HART COMES IN AND PLANTS HIM WITH THE HART ON!!
MN: Cruise and Hiroshi are going after Olvir!
DT: And there he goes!!! The official is out... Olvir has been TOSSED out of the ring like a piece of trash by Cameron Cruise and Kin Hiroshi, and now JARED WELLS is all over Tony Fatora on the outside!
DM: Wow. Jared Wells!! I never thought I'd see the day!
[Wells forces the microphone out of Tony Fatora's hands as Hart, Hiroshi and Cruise look on approvingly. Upon reentering the ring, Wells is met with a loud chorus of boos, to which he responds with a smirk before finally moving the mic to his lips.]
WELLS: [Screaming] HHHEEEEYYYY YOU DIRTY *****ES!
[Cruise, Hart, and Hiroshi are hooting and hollering and the crowd continues to buzz.]
WELLS: Oh why, oh why is Jared Wells standing in an EPW ring? Why is Jared Wells standing in the same ring with these three men?
[He pauses and looks to the crowd.]
WELLS: Does anybody know? Anybody?
[He points to a woman at ringside with her husband.]
WELLS: How about you honey do you know why? More than likely you don't so go ahead and get daddy a beer. In fact, get daddy a case of beer because this night is just getting started. You have a man running around here named Triple X Sean Stevens. Pal, you need to make some phone calls about your name because any person in their right mind will tell you that you are a Jared Wells rip off. Call Sean Edmunds and ask about the year 1998. Where is Troy Douglas? Ice Tre?
[Jared yells and jumps around the ring.]
WELLS: LLLLINNNNNSAAAAYYY TROY?! Where are they? I'll tell you where. They are sitting back behind that curtain gasping that not only that I'm still alive, but still the man. How about the act of Crimson Calling? Jared Wells thinks it's stupid. In fact Jared Wells believes a lot of acts around here are stupid. But now! NNNOOOOWW! I'm here for this man.
[He points to Cruise and yells.]
WELLS: FOR THIS SON OF A B(BLEEP)H!!
[He points to Kin and yells.]
WELLS: FOR THIS SON OF A B(BLEEP)H!!
[He points to Hart and yells.]
WELLS: AND FOR THIS SON OF A B(BLEEP)H!!
With myself, it's what we call The Anthology. The EPW today consists of the same old boring sausage story. I mean why is Larry Tact still alive? Are you kidding me? Sean Stevens is a bad case of VD. My god the poor bastard is a poster boy. I really want to give him credit but I won't. He is your typical dumb ass in the EPW. It's like having that one crack head friend around that you feel sorry for. Sean Stevens fits the bill. Stalker is just somebody that missed a few hugs in life. Mommy and daddy couldn't do the job and all I can tell him is get a woman which I'm sure thats hard for him. How about Fusenshoff? He's that guy at a party who drinks four Miller Limes then passes out and everybody tea bags for a MySpace picture. You know I listened to JA talk about his match with "THE ORIGINAL TRIPLE X" Sean Stevens. [laughs] I'm not sure whether I want to suggest he is a better wrestler or sports-caster. I actually heard JA talk and I thought ESPN was on. I said to myself this isn't the spice channel. Of course I changed it right away.
[Jared pauses, puts down the mic, high fives Cruise and Kin then puts his arm around Hart.]
WELLS: The pretty picture here is that Cruise, Kin, Hart, and myself are bored with everything. Each of us don't intend on picking up the ball and running with it. All four of us have a pair of scissors and we plan on sprinting towards each and everyone of you. I've been known to rape history, yet make it at the same time and tonight marks the first day in the EPW with aristocracy. I take these three men with me at all costs. Now that daddy is back I heard Larry Flynt made a new porno called Who's Nailin' Palin? That's easy, Daddy Wells is nailing Palin!
[He throws and flips the microphone into the air and puts his arms around his guys. The crowd boos heartily as the three step over they stand amidst the devastated remains of their opponents.]
MN: It is SOOOOOOOOOO on!!
DM: Wow.
DT: Well, I mean... needless to say, Olvir and the Crimson Calling will pick up the win here via disqualification... but WOW is right, Dean Matthews. Jared Wells is in EPW and he's joined forces with Cameron Cruise, Kin Hiroshi, and Shawn Hart!
MN: Sick.
DM: Olvir and the CC boys probably don't even know what hit 'em.
MN: I'm pretty sure it was a steel chair, Dean-o! HAH!
[With "Who Want It" blaring in the background, Hart, Hiroshi, Cruise, and Wells hit the top of the ramp and pose for the crowd despite their obvious disapproval. In the ring, the referee, Black, Dalkichev, and Olvir begin to receive attention from the ringside medics.]
DT: Again, it's Olvir and company by DQ thanks to Jared Wells, but fans we've got much, MUCH more still to come!