OPENING VIDEO PACKAGE
The IWC symbol appears on a pitch black background before fading into the darkness from which it resonated. Abruptly the scene opens on the headline of a newspaper.
OVERBOOKED EXTRAVAGANZA HEADED TO THE MANHATTEN CENTER OCTOBER 5TH
A picture of Orlando Cruze and Christian Savior nose to nose can be seen beneath said headline, the World Championship belt superimposed in the background. Suddenly a loud roar rips through the background, causing the newspaper to shake. The person reading it lowers the pages and looks up with his slanted eyes in terror.
Japanese Tourist: AAHHH, MECHA-DESOLATION!
His shrill voice carries throughout the crowded street corner as he points towards the heavens in terror. Although that doesn’t stop him from lifting his camera and taking a photo, even as he’s engulfed by a giant shadow. Now a 700 foot Desolation is seen stomping through New York City, unleashing a Godzilla like roar before thrusting both of his fists against his chest.
Pedestrians: Ahhh, ahhh, run in circles!
Desolation continues to stomp down the street, crushing defenseless fans beneath his feet and mashing cars with his giant boots. He passes by a giant television screen mounted to the front of a building that features scenes of Desolation striking Johnny Kingdom in the head with a 2x4 wrapped in barbwire.
As the Dark Man stomps along he passes by Pat Evans wrapped around the top of the Sears tower, swatting at airplanes flying around his head. They fire on him to little effect as his palm effortlessly mashes them out of the air. One of these such airplanes has a long banner hanging behind it.
The banner showcases images of Evans presenting a gift to Hurse, only to find Pat’s fist at the bottom of the box. It flies upwards and strikes Hurse directly to the jaw, knocking him down.
AAAARRRHHHHH….
Another Godzilla like roar can be heard from Jason Wheeler, who comes traipsing through downtown New York, kicking tanks out of his way. He bends forward and an explosion of flames emanates from his mouth, shooting down at the military vehicles firing upon him.
Smoldering pieces of paper fly up from the street with images of Riggs accidentally superkicking Jason to the jaw, sending him crashing through a table.
Japanese singing filters into this chaotic scene, sounding like its being sung by three tiny women as Robin Brooks comes flying down from the sky. Giant moth wings are attached to her back as she swoops down over the Manhattan Center, shooting some kind of weird electrical blast from her mouth onto the streets beneath her. One of her targets appears to be a giant poster attached to a bus stop featuring David Freak kissing the back of Aurora’s hand
A huge beast with two heads now appears. One head is that of Max Craven, and the other belongs to Axl Evermore, yet both of their long lengthy necks attach to the same body. They lift up a bus and fling it across the city at the flying Robin. It crashes into her side and sends Brooks soaring off course, smashing through a building.
Monstrous laughter emits from Fully Loaded, who lift their arms above their heads when a massive Christian Savior comes charging through the city spearing their body to the ribs. Craven and Evermore fly backwards as both men slam into an apartment structure, reducing it to rubble.
A giant flying saucer inexplicably comes flying down from the sky, shooting some kind of particle cannon at random buildings. The giant chrome dome of the saucer seems to have Orlando Cruze’s face on it. The saucer fires repeatedly at the giant Savior, who tries to run away to avoid being hit.
Random Bystander: Where are they going?
The camera surveys New York City which now lays in ruins as all of these gigantically proportioned IWC competitors converge on the Manhattan Center. They all gather around it as the flying Robin Brooks swoops down and rips the roof off of the building. The camera heads inside of the Manhattan Center.
THE OVERBOOKED EXTRAVAGANZA
An explosion of pyrotechnics erupt from the stage, the ring posts and the titontron, ushering us forth to another big IWC pay-per-view. The gathered masses are on their feet, opting to overlook the bizarre video package they just witnessed in favor of embracing their excitement.
Mark Comeau: The time is FINALLY here, we are emanating live from the Manhattan Center on pay-per-view, and this is the Overbooked Extravaganza.
The camera continues to pan over the screaming, packed crowd, briefly cutting to the entry way which is designed to resemble the entrance to a club. A long red carpet is rolled out leading towards the ring and a bouncer is even present holding a velvet rope.
Susie Moore: Mark we’ve got to get out of here, we’ve got to get out of here. There are giant monsters coming!
Mark: That was just a video package Susie, and a poorly produced one at that. But we will surpass all other expectations tonight with an absolutely loaded card that includes two titles matches, the first time ever encounter of Desolation and Johnny Kingdom, and not to mention a blockbuster surprise.
Moore: I hope the surprise is free pound puppies.
FULLY LOADED
VS
DAVID FREAK & AURORSE ROSE
VS
THE RAINES SISTERS
VS
ROBIN BROOKS & PHANTOM
A deep voice sounds over the loudspeakers as the following words appear on the Cartel-Tron...
SEX
&
VIOLENCE
It goes into the IWC edit of "All Nightmare Long" by Metallica as the crowd is buzzing in anticipation of who's about to emerge from the back: none other than the IWC contingent of Fully Loaded, Max Craven and Axl Evermore.
"'Cause we hunt you down without mercy, hunt you down all nightmare long!
Feel us breathe upon your face!
Feel us shift, every move we trace!
Hunt you down without mercy, hunt you down all nightmare long, yeah!
LUCK...RUNS...OUT; You crawl back IN-ah, but your
LUCK RUNS OUT-AH!!"
The crowd goes wild as the Casablanca Casanova and the Big Apple Superstar make their way to the center of the stage. They check their name with the bouncer and he removes the velvet rope, letting them stroll towards the ring.
Kailey Worf: On their way to the ring...from NEW YORK CITY, at a combined weight of 466 pounds, representing Fully Loaded...Max Craven and Axl Evermore...they ARE...SEX...&...VIOLENCE!!
Evermore and Craven pump their fists and generally do guts poses at the center of the stage, riling the roaring crowd up, before determinedly heading down the ramp with a pep in their step. They slide into the ring and Axl looks around with a grin and then pushes himself up as Max rolls into a front headspring, landing on his feet. They head to adjacent corners and climb, throwing their arms out with open palms and open-mouth smiles as the crowd cheers, then they hop down and head to the center. Axl drops to one knee and thrusts his arms out as Max behind him raises his arms in an X, and as Evermore points to himself with his thumbs, pyro explosions go off in time behind them to his three thumb points. As the smoke clears, they take off their team jackets and drape them over their corner while hopping in place and throwing hands into the air while whispering strategy to each other.
Mark: Max Craven and Axl Evermore representing Fully Loaded as we kick off the Overbooked Extravaganza with what should be a frantic four corners tag team match.
Susie: This should be as fun as my trips to the dentist. He always puts me under, although when I wake up no work has been done on my teeth and my under garments are missing.
Mark: Hahahaha, disgusting.
Craven and Evermore continue to get themselves revved up for this Quest for the Crowns Preview match.
Tell me exactly
Rah! Rah!
It doesn't really seem
Rah! Rah!
Is she not right?
You always wanted
Rah! Rah!
Is she not right?
Ramidi ma ma ba di ma!
Is she really telling lies again?
Eeeeeeeyow!
Is she not right?
The little bitch,
what am I supposed to do?
Now that I have
allowed you to beat me!
Do you think that
we could play another game?
Maybe I can win this time?
I kind of like
the misery you put me through.
Darling, you can trust me
completely.
If you even try
to look the other way,
I think that I could kill this time.
Rah! Rah!
I'm getting through to you.
Though I see you weeping so sweetly.
I think that you might
have to take another taste,
a little bit of hell this time.
Lie to me!
Rah! Rah!
Lie to me!
Is she insane?
Will she now run for her life
in the battle that ends this day?
Is she not right?!
Is she insane?!
Will she now run for her life
now that she LIED TO ME!
people to remember you.
You leave your little mark on
society!
Don't you know your wish
is coming true today?
Another victim dies tonight.
Lie to me!
Rah! Rah!
Lie to me!
Is she insane?
Will she now run for her life
in the battle that ends this day?
Is she not right?!
Is she insane?!
Will she now run for her life
now that she LIED TO ME!
Ramidi ma ma din do!
Ramidi ma ma ba di ma!
Ramidi ma ma ba di mo!
[all x3]
Doesn't she realize she's in danger?
Is she insane?
Will she now run for her life
in the battle that ends this day?
Is she not right?!
Is she insane?!
Will she now run for her life
now that she LIED TO ME!
she went and she told A LIE!
Now she will never tell another.
A LIE!
The little bitch,
she went and she told A LIE!
NEVER FUCKING LIE TO ME!
The curtains start to move and out runs the energetic yet egotistical Robin Brooks, many of the fans disgusted by her presence. Lurking behind her is the tall and impressive Phantom, who’s stoic eyes take in all the fans on hand for this event. Brooks wears a smile on her face as she extends her arms out to her sides, pyrotechnics erupting. This flashes of light illuminate the X-Class Championship belt wrapped around her waist. Phantom steps up behind her and engulfs her shoulder with one of his massive palms. She pats it reassuringly as the two make their way to the ring.
Comeau: Here we have a very interesting combination of speed and strength entering this Quest for the Crowns preview match. Although their contrast in styles isn’t the only thing interesting about this duo, because Phantom still believes Robin is his mother.
Susie: And she makes such a good mother too, unlike my own mommy, who still hasn’t bought me a pony.
Mark: If Robin bought Phantom a pony, I don’t think he’d know rather to sit on it or eat it.
Phantom lifts Robin into the air and places her on the apron to save her the trouble of doing so herself. She slips through the ropes and gives both Craven and Evermore a penetrating stare while her humungous son steps up onto the apron behind her.
The arena goes black as a lone piano performance roars over the PA. Purple and blue lights flick on as blue and gold metalic shavings of confetti fall from the rafters. The lights dim as the piano nears it's end. The lights are out once more, leaving the arena in complete darkness before a roaring explosion on the stage accompanied by the roaring guitar of "Spirit of the Underdog" silhouettes David Freak. He stands in the on the stage looking out to the crowd, nodding slowly at the oncoming cheers and jeers from the crowd. He then turns, thrusting his hand outward as Aurora Rose steps through the curtains shaking her head. Clearly she’s conflicted about teaming with Freak tonight, yet walks alongside her husband nevertheless.
"Seen you round, I know your face.
Watched you try to grow up with grace.
Seen that heart out on your sleeve.
Like it's so much life you're dying to feel
Dying to feel"
Freak throws his arms up into the air as he cockily spins around as he makes his way down the ramp. Aurora continues to trail behind rolling her eyes but throwing up a few rock gestures towards the crowd. A few male fans “hoot” and “holler,” prompting Freak to point them out in a threatening manner.
"Cause if you've got to steal, you've got to steal the show
It's the spirit of the underdog
And if you've got to break, you've got to break the mold
It's the spirit of the underdog"
Aurora is annoyed by David’s antics as he struts his way down the rest of the ramp showing off in any way he possibly can. He reaches the ring side and grabs onto the ropes to pull himself up before quickly parting the cables so that Aurora can enter. She steps up onto the apron but slips through another set of ropes, leaving Freak strangely dejected.
Susie: Mr. and Mrs. Freak are now entering the ring, and boy did they ever have a storybook wedding. I want mine to be under the sea, just like the Little Mermaid.
Mark: If you do get married underwater, make sure you don’t take an oxygen tank. Aurora Rose and David Freak, who were married by Krissie McMorris against their will, have surprisingly gelled as a team in recent weeks. Let’s see if they can maintain such cohesiveness in this contest.
Aurora and Freak point towards Max Craven and Axl Evermore angrily. Max motions towards himself in confusion, wondering why he’s being singled out just because he was the priest who married them. Robin and Phantom seem to enjoy the hostility between these two teams as they strategize in their corner. That’s when the lights flash pink and purple on the stage and a crazed laughter is heard over the PA system, it then progresses into “Skinny Little Bitch” by Angelspit. Through the curtains now strolls Stacy Raines, Jessica Raines and their manager Conner Anderson. He stands between the two lovely yet deadly ladies who wrap their arms around each other’s shoulders and start down the ramp.
Once the Gothic Diva and the Cyber Bitch reach the ring they jump to the apron, slipping through the ropes then climbing adjacent corners which they back flip out of them.
Comeau: And here’s another lethal team thrown into the mix. We’ve seen some stunning performances from the Raines Sisters since their debuts. However, both their matches, which involved Freak, Rose, and Axl Evermore, have ended in defeat. Can they turn it around here tonight?
Moore: I hope not, because when I turn around too quickly it makes me sea sick.
Starting out the match are Max Craven and David Freak, two individuals who certainly aren’t on speaking terms. As soon as the bell sounds they begin to circle one another, keeping a careful eye on their opponent. They now rush forward into a collar elbow before David immediately spins under Max’s arm and takes him by the wrist, whipping him into the ropes. Craven bounces from the cables and comes back in at Freak who bends forward for a back drop only to have Craven leap frog him.
Max rushes into the ropes behind Freak and springs to the second rope. He flies off of it and twists around for possibly a soaring lariat only to have David drop down out of the way. As a result Max ducks his head, dropping into a roll and ending up on his feet. He again rushes into the cables, bouncing off and coming back in at Freak who tries to catch him with a hip toss. Freak hoists him into the air when Max twists his body, wedging his feet to his opponent’s ribs.
Craven falls to his back and monkey flips David through the air only to have Freak flip over and land with grace on his feet. Max nips up to a standing base and spins around as he and Freak freeze, cautiously eyeing one another.
Comeau: An exchange of counters between Freak and Craven to start out this four corners match.
Moore: There are so many people in the ring, it’s just like the View, only with no Whoopi Goldberg.
Without warning Max’s shoulder is slapped by Stacy Raines, who slips through the ropes wanting to get her hands on Freak. Craven shrugs and exits the ring while David prepares to lock up with the vengeful Stacy, who is doing some serious smack talking. Before they lock up however, Aurora sticks her hand out over the cables, wanting to get in there against Stacy.
A smirk settles on David’s face as he approaches her and slaps the outstretched hand to a riveting response. Rose enters the squared circle and immediately charges at Stacy. Raines runs right at her as well, the two interlocking arms before Stacy pulls her down into an arm drag. Aurora rolls forward across the canvas then gets to her feet and charges right at Stacy who throws a lariat. The quick Aurora ducks it and charges into the ropes, jumping to the middle one and springing off towards her aloof opponent.
Stacy turns as Aurora adjusts in mid-air, catching her by the arm and pulling her over into a springboard arm drag. Raines flips over and slams into the ring, rolling across it to a standing base. She bounces off the cables and comes back in at a standing Aurora, who catches her inbound opponent with a tilt a whirl. However, Stacy counters the tilt a whirl attempt into another arm drag of her own.
Moore: Those arms are so getting in the way, they should just gnaw them off.
Comeau: Yeah, sounds reasonable. Some creative arm drags displayed by Aurora and Stacy, in what has really been a fast paced contest so far.
Aurora rolls to her seat reaching for her back as Stacy steps in and grabs her hair, forcing her up to a standing base. She takes her wrist and whips her into the ropes, Rose diving at them so that the back of her head hits the top cable. This repels her back into the ring where she immediately drops into a backwards roll, doing a headstand with her shins landing on top of Stacy’s shoulders. Raines finds herself stunned as she’s flipped forward into a head scissors.
Mark: Oh, a unique counter by Aurora, I don’t think I’ve seen that before.
Stacy rolls right across the canvas to her feet, ending up directly in her corner, where she promptly makes the tag to Jessica. Aurora comes charging in right as the Gothic Diva lunges over the ropes and catches her around the neck, trying to go for a tornado DDT. At the last second Aurora pushes her off though, causing Jessica to land on her feet with surprising grace considering the size of her awkward goth boots.
The hair on the back of Stacy’s neck stands up as Stacy rushes out of the corner behind her. This prompts Aurora to back elbow her to the face, foolishly taking her eyes off of Jessica who steps in and clamps her arms about her waist. Stacy quickly steps out of the corner and superkicks Aurora under the jaw while Jessica snaps back into a bridging German suplex.
1
2
Aurora surprisingly kicks out, dropping over backwards onto her knees.
Comeau: Close one there after some excellent team work from the Raines sisters.
Moore: They folded Aurora up like a piece of paper, and she’s almost thin enough to be one. Although I probably wouldn’t write on her.
A startled Aurora starts to get up when Jessica takes her around the neck, locking in a side headlock. She now rushes forward and drives the top of Aurora’s head right into the turnbuckle post like she were a battering ram. Right at that moment Stacy tags her sister and pulls herself over the ropes into a sunset flip, rolling Aurora over in reverse.
1
Jessica climbs up the turnbuckle behind her seated sister’s back and jumps over her coming down with both goth boots into double stomp right to Aurora’s ribcage. David covers his eyes and turns away with sadness as Aurora curls into a ball and writhes in anguish.
Moore: Ewww, if Aurora was constipated before, I don’t think she is after that move.
Comeau: More teamwork from the Raines sisters who are on the verge of winning this preview match.
Stacy stands up and flips forward into a jackknife cover on Aurora now.
1
2
She has no idea that Robin Brooks is pulling herself over the top rope into a slingshot senton right across Stacy’s ribs. As a result Raines’ back is forced down hard into Aurora’s sternum, causing both ladies to suffer just as Robin gets to her feet and vacates the ring.
Stacy rolls around gripping at her ribs as official Wright checks on Aurora’s condition. He has no idea that behind his back Stacy has been grabbed by the ankle and dragged into the Alpha Generation corner by Phantom. The brute steps over the ropes and waits for the referee to turn around. As soon as Wright does Phantom slaps Stacy’s foot and tags himself into the contest.
Mark: I think things are going to become a little more methodical now that the giant is in there.
Moore: Yeah, Frankenberry got the tag, is it legal to tag someone’s foot though. I would think it make your hand stinky.
Phantom grabs hold of Stacy’s ankle and rolls her over in reverse before taking her by the back of the head then pitching her over the top rope. Stacy crashes hard to the outside mats while Phantom grabs hold of Aurora, dragging her to her feet then whipping her into the turnbuckle. Aurora hits it hard spine first before Phantom charges in, turning his back and driving all of his weight spine first right into her damaged body.
As soon as he connects his eyes cut to David Freak, pointing to his forehead to signify that he hasn’t forgotten about that chair shot from several weeks ago. He now reaches out and slaps Robin’s hand, tagging her into this contest before dragging Rose out of the corner. The giant hoists Aurora into the air and connects with a Manhattan drop right across his elevated knee. She continues to straddle the knee right as Robin jumps over her partner’s back and dropkicks Rose right to the sternum.
Aurora is knocked to her spine as Phantom stands up and grabs hold of her legs, dropping back into a catapult. Aurora just sands up when Robin dives through the air and hits her with a corkscrew kick. The shot nails Rose between the eyes, severally disorientating her before she drops spine first right across the raised knees of Phantom. As the big man lays on his back he maintains his grasp on Aurora’s ankles, his knees raised right into the small of Aurora’s arched back. That’s when Robin rushes into the ropes to their side, springing off the second rope into a moonsault. However, in mid-air she twists around and comes crashing down spine first right across Aurora’s ribs with the twisting senton.
Mark: Now Robin and Phantom showing what makes them such a good team headed into the Quest for the Crowns tournament.
Moore: Can I just pretend I don’t see any of these moves so that I don’t have to comment on them?
Aurora, who’s now been in there for several moments taking a great deal of damage, drops to her back, Robin crawling into the cover.
1
2
David enters the ring and stomps down at the back of Robin’s head, breaking up the three count. Wright jumps directly in his path, demanding he vacate the ring while behind the official Phantom has re-entered the ring and is now stomping at the down Aurora. Robin joins in with the stomps, both she and her son inflicting as much damage as possible behind the referee’s back.
Comeau: Oh come on ref, turn around!
Moore: Poor Mrs. Freak.
The crowd is jumping all over Robin and Phantom as the official finally starts to turn around. This prompts Phantom to quickly vacate the ring while Robin takes Aurora by the hair, slowly rolling her to her knees. She playfully slaps Aurora repeatedly to the cheek, looking as if she’s unconvinced that Rose is even a challenge. Brooks now grabs Aurora around the waist, tightly squeezing it via the bearhug.
Despite the damage that has been inflicted on her Aurora lifts her fist, shaking it defiantly above her head to a loud reaction. She slowly stands up with the X-Class Champion rising to her feet behind her and now reaches down, taking Robin around the head. Aurora is able to pry the arms of Brooks away from her waist and now rush forward, going for the Sinful Desires (Stratusfaction).
At the last second Brooks pushes her off and then dives across the ring slapping the palms of both Stacy and Jessica. The Raines sisters enter the ring having no idea that Aurora has jumped over the top rope landing on the apron. Jessica spots her and comes rushing in when Aurora lunges to the top rope and springs off, diving over top of the inbound Raines. She falls into a forward roll towards Stacy who drops down to a crawling base in front of her to avoid whatever Aurora was setting up for.
Rose jumps over Stacy and rushes into the cables, bouncing off of them and then coming back in at her opponents, Stacy still crawling and Jessica just spinning around. Aurora shockingly steps off of Stacy’s back and launches herself at Jessica, catching her around the neck and pulling her around into a tornado DDT.
Susie: That game of extreme leapfrog ending in disaster for the girl in really nice boots.
Mark: Aurora leaping off the back of Stacy and catching Jessica with the tornado DDT.
A struggling Aurora rolls across the canvas and finds herself seated unintentionally in the corner of Fully Loaded, where Axl Evermore tags himself into the match for the first time. He and Craven now enter the ring, Axl going after the team he paired alongside Hellkat to defeat several weeks ago. Fully Loaded charge at a standing Stacy, both of them chopping her hard across the sternum just as she got her feet beneath her.
Stacy staggers backwards as the duo take her by her wrists, swinging around under her arms then pushing her into the cables. They both whip her off into the opposite ropes, Stacy bouncing off of them and coming back in at Axl who steps forward and catches her with a tilt a whirl into the backbreaker.
Stacy bounces off of the knee and stands upright reaching for her kidneys when Max comes charging in, catching her with a STO. The move causes Raines to be tripped backwards and to come down spine first right across the raised knee of Evermore.
Comeau: A devastating series of back breakers by both Craven and Evermore. It’s unbelievable just how well these two gel.
Moore: I like gel, especially hair gel, it tastes delicious.
Stacy is still arched back first over Axl’s knee before he takes her around the waist, lifting her up into the air in a side slam position. That’s when Max rushes into the cables at their side, springing from the second rope then twisting into a leg drop across Stacy’s neck just as Axl falls into the side slam as well. Raines crashes with great force into the canvas as a result while Axl hooks both of her legs for the pinfall.
1
2
Brooks enters the ring and stomps Axl to the side of the head before quickly scampering back into her corner.
Comeau: Fully Loaded so close to picking up the win in this match if it hadn’t been for Robin Brooks yet again breaking up a pinfall.
Moore: She sure does like doing that, almost as much like I like watching Heehaw.
Referee Wright is forcing Craven out of the ring while Axl stands, unaware that Jessica has regained her senses after that DDT and is now charging forward. Evermore spots her coming in, bending down and catching her against his shoulders before back dropping her over the cables where she crashes to the outside mats. Behind his back a groggy Stacy lunges across the ring and slaps David Freak, tagging him back into this contest. Axl spins around just in time to spot Freak starting to slip through the ropes into the ring.
Therefore Evermore charges at him, going for a big boot to the side of his face only to have David step back and avoid it. As a result Axl’s spine is now facing him as David reaches over the ropes, taking him around the jaw then falling from the apron, pulling the back of Evermore’s neck down into the cables. Axl bounces off and staggers forward gripping at his neck while David springs off the top rope, flying through the air then hitting a forearm smash right to the back of Evermore’s head.
Comeau: David entering the match and doing so in a very big way by taking out the red hot Axl Evermore.
Moore: Axl is hot in a Danny Devito kind of way.
The quick David stands and turns right as Jessica Raines comes charging at him going for a big boot to his face. Freak ducks the goth boot and catches her leg before hoisting Jessica into a capture back breaker right across his knee. The Gothic Diva convulses as a result, rolling across the canvas reaching for her spine while David stands up and turns towards an angry Phantom. The big man steps in and throws a huge jab at David’s head, remembering the events that have transpired between them over the past few weeks involving a steel chair. Freak ducks the massive fist and rushes into the ropes behind him, Phantom spinning around only to be hit with a front dropkick right to the shin.
Phantom falls to both knees just as David calls out for Aurora, who comes rushing into the ring. She jumps into the air as she’s caught across David’s back, Freak spinning her around into almost a modified 619, where both of her shins connect with Phantom’s forehead. The gothic giant is sent crashing to the canvas while Aurora is released, dropping from David’s back but then lunging into the air, landing right on top of his shoulders from behind.
She’s in a reverse hurricarana position, dropping back to seemingly hit the move. However, David holds onto her shins as she hangs upside down from his back. The crowd erupts as David pulls down her shins, creating a catapult effect that sends Aurora flying up and over his head then crashing down hard stomach first right into Phantom’s hefty mid-section.
Comeau: Aurora and Freak showing that despite their differences they can still work as a well oiled machine.
Moore: Yay, oil is fun, especially when you put it all over your body and slide across the kitchen floor.
Mark: Sounds fun.
A saddened Robin watches her giant son roll to the outside of the ring while Freak and Rose look very pumped up. Aurora turns towards David when in the heat of the moment he steps in giving her a big hug. Aurora doesn’t realize their hugging for a few moments but once she does she awkwardly pulls away, giving David a perplexed stare. The two seemingly have no idea how to react before Aurora is dropkicked from behind by Evermore.
The shot sends Aurora staggering forward into the ropes right as Robin pulls down on them from the apron. As a result Rose spills over the cables and falls to the outside mats. An angry David turns and lobs his arm at Axl for a big clothesline only to have the Fully Loaded member duck it. Freak spins back around and walks right into a hard thrust kick directly to the jaw. The shot sends David spinning into a circle, his eyes fluttering before he turns back towards Evermore who pulls him into his shoulders.
Axl has David in a fireman’s carry when Max comes flying off the top rope, crashing down knee first into the back of Freak’s head. As soon as Max hits the canvas he falls to his back and lifts his knees up into the air, Axl pulling Freak over into a death valley driver that causes him to crash back first right into Craven’s raised knees.
Moore: CRUMPETS!
Comeau: Axl delivering a death valley driver that planted Freak right onto his partner’s knees. All of these teams pulling out some spectacular tag moves in what has been a thrilling preview for Quest for the Crowns.
Freak rolls around on the ring looking to be in tremendous pain while Evermore crawls into the lateral press.
1
2
Robin drops a double axehandle into the upper back of Axl before quickly rolling out of the ring yet again.
Comeau: Dammit, damn that Robin Brooks, she’s like a pest that keeps ruining everything.
An “IWC” chant is starting based on all of this fast paced, frantic action taking place in the ring. Robin just starts to get up on the apron when a vengeful Axl rushes at her throwing a fist. Brooks drops down out of harms way while Axl moves back towards the struggling Freak.
He blasts David over his upper back between the shoulder blades then back chops him to the side of the face, almost knocking Freak over. Somehow he remains kneeling, looking incredibly dazed as Axl steps in hooking both of his arms, going for the Flipside. David places his hands to Evermore’s ribs though, shoving him backwards and freeing his disorientated frame from the piledriver position. Freak now staggers backwards into the corner when Evermore charges straight at him, jumping into the air for a big splash.
At the last second David steps out of the way, causing Evermore to collide sternum first with the turnbuckle. He bounces off staggering backwards into the waiting arms of Freak. He wraps them around Axl’s waist then falls into a backwards roll, pulling Evermore along with him, as soon as they end up back on their feet David snaps over into a German suplex.
Comeau: Ohhh, Freak hitting a rolling German suplex, but it doesn’t look like he has enough to hold on for the pinfall.
Moore: It still looked painful, just like when I have my armpits waxed.
Freak is unable to maintain the bridge for the pin, his back in far too much pain. He releases Evermore who falls to the canvas, both men looking a little worse for wear. Evermore and Freak slowly begin to get to their feet, unaware that both Stacy and Jessica are climbing diagonal corners. Just as both Axl and David stand the Raines sisters come flying off their respective turnbuckles, crashing down onto the two men with identical crossbodies.
Jessica takes Axl down to the canvas while Stacy collides with Freak, both men laid out beneath the high flying Raines duo. They now roll to their feet and interlock hands as Aurora slides into the ring to come to her partner’s aid. Just as she stands the Raines sisters bolt across the ring and connect with a double lariat that sends her flipping right back over the cables. She lands on her feet somehow right as Stacy flips over the top rope and crashes down into her with a senton pancha.
Jessica now turns around and spots Phantom still recuperating on the outside of the ring, charging forward for another dive. She begins to lunge through the ropes for the suicide headbunt when Robin steps in the way and delivers a swift, hard buzzsaw like kick right to the top of her cranium.
Mark: Again Brooks interjecting herself without actually tagging herself into this match, although it seems everyone has now abandoned the tag rule.
Moore: It’s madness, it’s madness, just like the last twelve Nightmare on Elm Street sequels.
Robin stands up on the apron laughing to herself, amused that she took out Jessica before she could connect with Phantom. However, she has no idea that Max is scaling a nearby turnbuckle and now launches himself from the top rope into a twisting senton that sends him crashing down on top of Phantom. Both men tumble to the outside mats, Max obviously trying to take out everyone so that Evermore can pick up the win in the ring.
As he gets to his feet however, Craven is aloof to the fact that Robin has rushed across the apron and dove to the second rope of the turnbuckle, flipping over backwards into a big moonsault. She comes crashing down right on top of Craven’s shoulder as both athletes tumble to the outside mats.
Inside of the ring Evermore and Freak are getting to their feet as Stacy slides back in and immediately charges at them. David steps forward and catches the inbound Stacy under his arm, hoisting her up into the air only for her to slip onto his shoulder. He is taken around the neck as Stacy drops back, dragging David down with a reverse DDT from the running powerslam position.
Mark: Stacy back in there with a vicious reverse DDT variation, there are just bodies flying everywhere in this match.
Moore: This is just like the Flying Graysons, I just hope Two Face doesn’t show up with his horrible Tommy Lee Jones acting skills.
David rolls around on the canvas gripping at his battered skull while Stacy gets back to her feet. From the corner of her eye she spots Aurora sliding into the ring, going for a standing spinning heel kick to her face. Aurora ducks it and then grabs Stacy’s arm, tucking it between Raines’ own legs and hooking the other one. She lifts Stacy into the air with a pumphandle, transitioning her around so that her shins are on top of Rose’s shoulders and her body is straightened out above the canvas. Rose now falls to her seat, dragging Stacy down into a face buster across the canvas.
Moore: That looked like something out of that movie I was watching on Cinemax last night.
Mark: I’m not going to acknowledge what you just said.
Susie: Just like I don’t acknowledge what’s going on in the ring.
Aurora stands up severally aching and not spotting an inbound Jessica until it’s too late. She has no time to counter as a spinning back heel kick connects to her ribs, doubling her over. Jessica now rushes into the ropes in front of her doubled over opponent, bouncing off the cables then coming back in at Aurora who suddenly stands and twists her body, catching the inbound Raines against her shoulders. She stands up and pushes Jessica off of her shoulders into a TKO diamond cutter.
Jessica bounces hard from the ring while Aurora sluggishly begins to rise to her feet, really cooking at this point. That’s just when Robin slips into the ring behind her, taking her around the neck and dropping down into a reverse DDT. However, Robin lifts her knee in the process, dropping Aurora down back first right across it. Before Rose even has time to scream Robin stands up, still holding her in the reverse DDT position until they’ve stood completely erect. Now Brooks spins Aurora around straight from the reverse DDT position into a jumping x-factor.
Aurora’s face is planted with great force against the canvas as Robin rolls in reverse to her feet, sticking her arms out to her sides and spinning in circles. The Queen of the IWC wears a pretentious grin on her face before she turns right into Evermore, who catches her around the neck and thigh then drops back into an exploder suplex.
Comeau: Axl finally getting his hands on Robin Brooks in this matchup.
Moore: I thought manhandling women was Craven’s job. Or else there was something wrong about that free breast exam he gave me.
Robin writhes in pain, rolling across the canvas and reaching for her spine, Axl standing over her reading the riot act. He has no idea that Phantom is now rolling into the ring behind him, spotting his battered mommy. The sight of Robin in this condition sends the brute into a rage as he steps up behind Evermore and spins him around. He immediately catches him under the arm and twists into the black hole slam.
Mark: I think Axl made the monster mad.
Moore: And he’s no where near as gentle as Herman Munster.
Phantom now rises to his feet just as David comes barreling towards him only to be caught against the chest and stomach. He is thrown high into the air, crashing down right on top of the laid out Axl. With both men stacked on top of each other Phantom roars and jumps into the air, big splashing them both. Jeers and cheers are heard from the crowd as a result while the dominating, enraged Phantom gets to his feet and turns towards Craven who has just entered the ring. He now goes for a pump kick right to his face only to have Max duck it, causing Phantom to rack himself on the top rope.
He straddles the cables reaching for his genitalia in pain while Craven starts to stand up beside him. As soon as he reaches his feet a recovered Robin steps in delivering a superkick. However, Max ducks it, causing the boot to connect right across Phantom’s jaw. The shot sends the big man tumbling over the ropes to the outside of the ring.
Comeau: Ohhh, Robin just took out her own partner.
Susie: That’s child abuse!
Robin acts indifferent to her actions, turning around just as Craven connects with a jumping back heel kick to her jaw. The shot knocks Brooks backwards and through the ropes, Max turning around to spot Jessica Raines. She springs to the top rope and comes flying towards Max only to be caught with a boot to the ribs.
This shot doubles her over as Craven now lifts Jessica into the air and over his shoulder, setting up for the Hot Addiction (Widow’s Peak). Right before he can connect Raines frees her head, wrapping her legs around Craven’s waist then performing a sunset flip bomb. Max is flipped completely over backwards and driven with incredible force across the back of his head and shoulders. Jessica sits up going for the pin.
1
2
Craven launches his shoulder from the ring in the nick of time.
Mark: Jessica close to getting the pinfall. I don’t even think the referee knows who’s the legal participants in this match at this point.
Moore: That’s so lazy.
Comeau: Your hardly the person who should be critiquing one’s work ethic.
Craven now rolls across the ring and spills to the outside mats, holding the back of his head in the process. An exhausted Aurora approaches Max, driving her forearm into the side of his face repeatedly while in the ring Jessica rushes towards her upright sister Stacy. She ducks her head, the back of it hitting Stacy’s ribs then flips up into the air, now being held in a crucifix position. Stacy rushes across the ring and throws her sister with a crucifix bomb over the ropes where she comes crashing down right on top of both Rose and Craven.
Mark: OHHH! Stacy just using her OWN sister as a weapon.
David has rolled under the ropes to the apron, watching all of this insanity while leaning against one of the turnbuckles. Inside of the ring Stacy is still pumped but has no idea that Evermore is stepping up behind her. He reaches out and takes her around the neck, bending her over backwards then lifting her into a reverse suplex. However, Evermore twists his body and catches Stacy across the top of his shoulders in a fireman’s carry before pushing her around into the Michaelson Reverse DDT.
The crowd erupts at the sight of this while Evermore crawls into the cover, hooking Stacy’s leg.
Comeau: Fully Loaded on the verge of victory, Sex & Violence may be the first team that challenges Cruze and Kingdom for the Tag Titles.
Susie: This is as exciting as the first time I used the potty. Thanks for teaching me by the way Mark.
Mark: After 21 years I knew you’d eventually get the hang of it.
Axl continues to lay on Stacy for the pin as the official drops down, making the count.
1
2
Robin comes charging into the fray at the last second then launches herself into the air with a standing shooting star press. The Flying Star connects with Axl’s back and further squashes Stacy. A roar of pain erupts from Evermore as he rolls off of Stacy, Robin dropping down into the lateral press on the Raines’ sister.
Comeau: Now the Flying Star, that has to be enough!
The official again starts to make the count to screams of despair.
1
2
Their reaction changes when David back flips off of the nearby turnbuckle, spinning around into the Twisting Phoenix Splash. He comes down right on top of Robin and Stacy. The impact causes Brooks to roll away from Raines holding her back while David hooks Stacy’s leg to a huge reaction.
1
2
3
David Freak and Aurora Rose have done it, they’ve won the four corners Quest for the Crowns preview match.
Mark: And it’s over, Aurora and David are victorious in one of the most wild tag team encounters in IWC history.
Moore: Yay, what do they win? I’ve got a puzzle for them, although I ate most of the pieces.
Comeau: No, now David Freak and Aurora Rose will be the first team to challenge Johnny Kingdom and Orlando Cruze in the Quest for the Crowns tournament.
Susie: My half eaten puzzle would have been better.
The crowd is still going nuts as Aurora slides into the ring, holding her ribs and approaching the upright, equally as aching Freak. Without thinking about it she jumps into his arms, David wrapping them around their waist. The two turn in circles celebrating before Aurora awkwardly pushes away, realizing what they’re doing. She puts her palms up and turns away from David, confused over her emotions.
That’s when the celebrating Freak walks up behind her and delivers a slap to her ass.
David: Good match partner.
He quickly drops down to the canvas as Aurora spins around, looking enraged by the sportsman like pat of the behind. All the while the other teams are recovering from this hellacious encounter.
Mark: We’ve certainly kicked things off tonight at a high gear and we’ve still got five more matches to follow.
Susie: Is this the part where you hype the pay-per-view for twenty minutes even though people have already ordered it?
Craven has slid into the ring, assisting Evermore to his feet while Robin is glaring through the ropes at an upright Phantom. The big man is rubbing his jaw and looking ill-tempered.
Phantom: My mommy would never hurt me.
Doubt seems to linger in his eyes while Aurora and Freak stare each other down, the victors not looking to be on the same page.
MANIACAL DESTINY
An unsettled Billy Mayne strides sideways down a corridor, apprehensively lifting a microphone to his protective plastic facemask.
Billy Mayne: I’m here backstage because apparently Dan Douglas is intent on ruining every aspect of my life. But why? I’m such a loveable human being, I ooze kindness from my very nipples. Even my toe jam is irresistible.
He lowers his face into his palm and shakes his head with concern.
Billy: What did I do to deserve this? Thank God I started sniffing glue….
He finally looks up while continuing to inch cautiously down a corridor.
Mayne: Anyway I’m here to um, um, interview, oh God I’ve had easier bowl movements than this….I’m here to interview…..PSYCHO.
Mayne’s palm engulfs his face as he turns away in terror, thrusting the microphone out towards Psycho who just comes into the camera’s view. His massive back faces the lens while his wide front side is planted in a corner, his palms pressed to the converging walls. He hangs his head in a sulking manner, his wet hair draped in front of his twisted face.
Psycho: Do you think I wanted to be here tonight?
Billy doesn’t dare speak, he just continues to hide his eyes from the horror and keep the mic extended as far away from his body as possible.
Psycho: Do you think Psycho wanted to come back to the IWC?
The mic trembles even more.
Psycho: Well HE DIDN’T!
Billy’s whimpering can be heard off camera as Psycho continues.
Psycho: This company has twisted, distorted and mutilated EVERYTHING that I believe in. It’s destroyed my life over and over again. But at the same time, hahahahaha, yes, at the same time it’s given Psycho’s life purpose. Without the IWC he never would have discovered he had a brother in Nathan Creed, my face never would have been scarred to represent just how mangled I am internally, and I never would have found another suffering soul much like Psycho’s own.
A twisted giggle emanates from Psycho as he rubs his forehead up against the wall, running it back and forth across the white plaster.
Psycho: I don’t know what I would do without the IWC, without the pain and drama it provides. That’s why I came back this time, because I have to SAVE IT. I have to stop the slow decay of all its principles, of everything that the IWC once stood for.
The demented eyes of Psycho turn towards Billy, who can feel his under-shorts getting soggier.
Psycho: The ranks of IWC are corrupted with disrespect for the true Warriors of the IWC... there is no respect for anybody... the owner is the biggest case of disrespect... he has soiled the legendary IWC status with his sodemy to respect...
Another chilling laugh emanates from the multiple time Livewire champion.
Psycho: Psycho has returned to restore the IWC name to respect across the country... and the only way he can achieve this... is to take Dan Douglas out of the equation... rid his name from the IWC annuls and take hold of the reigns of IWC until someone who is worthy enough can hold the company with pride.
Psycho grabs Billy’s brittle wrists, pulling the mic towards his trembling lips. Mayne falls to his knees, weeping as his wrist is almost shattered by the Herculean strength of the sadistic one.
Psycho: Psycho is here to save this company, and to save each and every one of you. It starts here tonight with a sacrifice and a rebirth, hahahaha.
The wrist is released and the microphone is dropped to the concrete. Billy falls to his knees rubbing at his wrist painfully while Psycho tilts his head, staring into the camera and moving slowly towards it.
TOO MAGNIFICENT VS. THE MYSTERY PRANKSTER
“Animal I’ve Become” hits the PA system and results in an outcry of boos from the crowd. Those packed in the Manhattan Center are downright outraged as through the curtains strolls the angered, miffed behemoth. His twisted, sour expression glances back and forth at the fans as his lower lip quivers. He now moves towards the ring and climbs to the apron, stepping over the ropes in preparation to battle the man who replaced his precious trashcan with a sex toy many weeks ago.
Mark: Well we go from an unusual situation backstage to an unusual situation in the ring. Thankfully Too Magnificent isn’t out here chokeslamming any referees like at our last pay-per-view, instead he’s here to settle the score with this mysterious prankster who has been making the lives of many superstars living hells.
Moore: We got to see a marching band last week thanks to him though. I haven’t seen a marching band since I tried out for baton girl, but I didn’t realize I had to swirl the baton instead of swallow it.
Comeau: How wonderfully inappropriate.
Too Magnificent’s ravenous eyes are focused on the entry way now as he bends forward, hands pressed to his knees. He seethes as he waits for his opponent, anxiously anticipating inflicting great pain. The words “How about I just do whatever I want” boom through the arena speakers and then Original Prankster blasts through the speakers. The curtains begin to sway back and forth as a figure slowly emerges through them.
Comeau: We’re now on the cusp of discovering this man’s true identity.
Moore: It better not be Keyser Soze, that would be such a weak twist.
Too Magnificent licks his chomps as through the curtains emerges a nice clean cut young chap who seems to be holding cue cards in his hands. He shuffles through them, reading one anxiously before nodding and looking towards the ring, putting on a big cheesy grin that confuses Too Mag.
Mark: Why is he reading cue cards?
Moore: Maybe he forgot how to walk to the ring. Happens to me all the time, once I ended up in the men’s room.
The mysterious competitor now lifts a big thumb into the air, directing it towards an increasingly befuddled Too Magnificent when a figure slides into the ring behind him. Too Magnificent has no idea that the short, slender gentleman has entered the ring behind him.
Comeau: Wait, who is that? I thought Too Mag’s opponent was standing on the ramp.
Moore: Are there two pranksters?
Before Too Mag can react he’s caught by the back of the trunks and rolled up into a school boy by the man who slithered into the ring behind him. The crowd is screaming as the count is made.
1
2
3!
A loud outburst shakes the Manhattan Center as the prankster has just defeated Too Magnificent within mere seconds.
Comeau: Wait, WHAT!?!
Moore: Too Mag was just pinned quicker than I lost my virginity.
The smirking prankster evades Too Magnificent by sliding under the ropes to the outside of the ring and now backing up the ramp. A pompous grin extends across his face as he steps to the side of the man who was occupying the entry way, reaching into his tights and removing a twenty. He now slaps it into the palm of the actor who completely distracted an enraged Too Magnificent.
Comeau: The individual that I’m now being informed is known as Porno Lad, has just completely set up Too Magnificent. He pranked him again by confusing Too Mag by hiring that actor to impersonate him.
Moore: Porno Lad? Something tells me I’ll have to get to know this man, where cameras can’t follow us.
The fans are still screaming as Porno Lad forks over his cash to the actor and winks to an absolutely furious Too Magnificent. His skin has transformed to a very bright shade of red as he marches around the ring, kicking the ropes and driving his forehead into the turnbuckle.
Comeau: I guess it’s safe to say that tonight didn’t go exactly as Too Magnificent had planned.
Susie: Well, that’s the way the cookie crumbles.
Mark: What the hell is that suppose to mean?
FOR REAL
An infuriated and irrational Too Magnificent has snatched hold of a microphone, having forced it out of the hands of Kailey Worf. The ring announcer looks dejected as she remains on the outside of the squared circle, looking up at Too Magnificent with concerned eyes.
Too Magnificent: No, no, no, that DIDN’T just happen!
The increasingly red flesh of Too Mag pulsates as he stares up the ramp towards the departing Porno Lad and the actor. They don’t even turn around to look back at Too Magnificent as they casually stroll through the curtains.
Mark: Too Magnificent understandably a little upset by what just transpired here on pay-per-view.
Moore: I don’t see why, he didn’t even have to work tonight, he just showed up and got a paycheck.
Comeau: The two of you must have more in common than you think.
Too Magnificent’s temper is on the verge of sending him into an implosion as he points up the ramp.
Too Magnificent: That guy couldn’t beat me in a REAL match! In fact, nobody can beat me in a REAL match. What you just saw was nothing short of an optical illusion. I want a REAL match, I want to redeem the wrong that was just committed.
The fans are jumping all over Too Mag’s case but he acts indifferent to their reaction.
Too Magnificent: I’m not leaving this ring until I get a REAL God damn matc….
Without warning, the arena lights switch over to a dark orange color. Then words manifest themselves onto the screen-
WORLD CLASS
The opening notes of "New Design" play throughout the arena as Too Magnificent’s eyes open wide enough to burst free from his skull. His lower lip quivers as through the curtains to the absolute shock of all those gathered in the Manhattan Center emerges Matt Hodges.
Mark: Whoa, whoa, whoa, what is former SCW World Champion Matt Hodges doing here?
Moore: It was the only place he could find to use the bathroom?
The crowd is still in a stunned state of silence as Matt Hodges himself swaggers towards the ring. Too Magnificent steps back, shaking his head in sheer disbelief while Hodges scales the steps onto the apron. He pauses for a moment and overlooks the fans who cannot help but to cheer irrationally.
Matt slips through the ropes into the ring then turns his confident eyes to a startled Too Magnificent.
Comeau: This is something I never thought I’d see. Matt Hodges has just stepped foot into an IWC ring. Is this the surprise we were promised?
Moore: You mean the shock isn’t the return of the singing panda? Why am I even here tonight then?
Every fan in attendance is standing and buzzing with excitement over the presence of Hodges, who shows no change in emotion as he gazes at the giant Magnificent. Obviously the former Cartel Champion has no idea how he should response so naturally he turns towards violence, rushing forward and throwing a big boot at Matt’s head.
Mark: Too Mag going right after Hodges!
Matt ducks the boot, turns towards Too Mag’s back and hooks both arms before dropping back into a release tiger suplex. The big man crashes across the back of his head and shoulders, flipping over and then rolling to the outside of the ring. Hodges then displays agility by nipping effortlessly back to his feet and approaching the microphone.
Comeau: With one move Matt Hodges has just taken out Too Magnificent. What is going on here tonight? Why is Matt even here?
Moore: To drop people on their heads? It does seem fun.
Too Magnificent looks loopy as he rolls under the ropes crashing to the outside mats. All the while Hodges grabs the mic from the canvas and swipes it off, cleaning it before he dare raises it to his lips. It’s hard to get a word in over the screams of the fans, who are still embracing their shock.
Matt Hodges: I never thought I’d be standing here saying this, mostly because I didn’t even know IWC had a ring or functioning microphones but “WORLD CLASS” Matt Hodges has arrived.
Another loud roar is heard from the crowd, who could care less about Hodges’ brash, insulting statements.
Hodges: Now calm down, I realize it’s not usual to have someone of “CLASS” here in the IWC, but rest assure this is REAL.
More screams generated from sheer shock emanate from the crowd.
Hodges: Yes, this is as REAL as Robin Brooks’ tits….
He pauses for a moment with his finger pressed to his jaw.
Matt: Hmm, maybe that wasn’t the best analogy, but there’s no need to buy stronger lenses for your glasses or take your required daily dosage of Prozac because a REAL Champion is now here in the IWC. For once a man of actual talent has stepped foot on this cheap imitation canvas to class this joint up a bit, to bring it out of the stone age into the modern era.
Mark: Bold words from Matt Hodges. I still can’t believe he’s here.
Susie: Then close your eyes and pretend he isn’t. Right now I’m pretending I’m a NASCAR driver, I’ve already punched my wife TWICE.
Hodges continues to arrogantly stride across the canvas.
Hodges: I know that your all taking that collective gasp before you drop to your knees and thank me, yes, THANK ME for providing this company with talent. And I intend to use said talent to wake up this complacent, lazy, and BORING roster. The best way to do that is simple, beat everyone, and in the IWC it’s not as challenging as it sounds. It’s less difficult than watching an entire episode of Friends although equally as torturous.
These statements are met with conflicted comments from the crowd.
Matt: After all, you can’t improve anything until you’ve tore it down, until you’ve brought it to its lowest point. Of course, sadly that’s where the IWC is right now, at least until it threw loads of cash at me and got my name signed on that dotted line…
There is a house in New Orleeeaaannsss
UHHHHH
They call the Rissssiiiinngg Sun
It’s been the ruin of plenty a poor boy
And lord I know I’m one….
Matt’s attention shifts half heartedly towards the Master of Control. Without delay Hurse saunters onto the stage, dressed in his wrestling gear and lowering his shaking head. The Extraordinary title belt glistens over his shoulder as Hurse continues down the ramp, lifting a finger into the air and shaking it back and forth.
Mark: And here I thought the ring couldn’t be weighed down even further by such massive egos.
Moore: I don’t like egos, even with syrup.
Comeau: Egos not Eggos.
It appears that Hurse is even laughing as he steps up the apron and slips through the ropes, microphone clutched in hand. Hurse now glares obnoxiously into Matt’s face.
Hurse: Hold it sweetheart, I think we’ve got our roles a little backwards here…
Matt pretends to be intrigued.
Hurse: I’m suppose to be the one making an ass out of your company and your suppose to assume the role of the WHITE KNIGHT by stopping me. I’m the Joker dammit, because I’m the COOL one.
Hodges thinks about it for a moment before providing a rebuttal.
Matt: Wow that sounds almost as boring as your antics Steven. Besides, according to the theory of ESCALATION it’s only natural that with you running amok in SCW that I would come here to the IWC, on your home-turf, to do the same. And word of advice, you might want to upgrade to natural grass, because Astroturf sucks.
Hurse: I LOVE ASTROTURF!! And So what? Are you like my evil doppelganger now?
Hodges: Good lord no; I can just imagine how shitty the world would be with two of you running around. It only takes one Hurse to drain all the entertainment out of the IWC already.
Hurse bites his lower lip in anger.
Hurse: I can’t believe your BALLS Hodges.
Matt: They have been complimented in the past.
Hurse: You’re not allowed to come to my company to prove something, it’s not FAIR. And besides, look at what I’ve done to the ENTIRE SCW roster. Doesn’t my dominance tell you something? Can’t you get a hint? You’ll never go anywhere or achieve a damn thing in THIS company, especially at my expense.
Hurse steps towards Hodges, thrusting his finger to his own chest.
Hurse: But maybe you need another demonstration of how superior the IWC roster is, and why it was a mistake for you to come to this company. So feel free to sit back and watch REAL winners at work as I add a little more gold to my lovely body in the form of the Submission title.
Matt nods his head, shockingly agreeable to this suggestion.
Matt: Sure, I’ll watch your match Steven, assuming I’m not operating heavy machinery at the same time. I can use a good laugh after all. Just try not to wear Robin Brooks out too much tonight. In the ring I mean, because obviously you don’t accomplish that in the sack.
A less than comforting or reassuring hand lands on Hurse’s shoulder, his face tensing with anger as Hodges departs the ring. His entrance music once again hits the PA system, sending the crowd into loud screams while Hodges slips through the ropes to the apron. Hurse watches him leave with twitching facial features.
PAT EVANS © VS. HURSE
Comeau: What an unbelievable turn of events here at the Overbooked Extravaganza. Matt Hodges has just joined the IWC roster and was immediately confronted by Hurse. We were promised a surprise, and I think we just got it.
Moore: I loved Hodges in Jonny Quest.
Mark: That was Hadjie, not Hodges.
“Outsider” rips throughout the PA system, resulting in a loud chorus of boos from the masses. Without delay Pat Evans marches through the curtains and onto the stage, the Submission title wrapped snuggly around his waist.
What seems to be of the utmost attention however is Orlando Cruze’s World Heavyweight title belt resting over his shoulder.
Comeau: What bad taste, Pat Evans wearing Orlando’s World title out here. The Conspiracy continues to lord the gold over the Icon, who we understand has yet to arrive at the building.
Moore: Pat is all decked out in gold, just like Goldmember. Do you think he has a golden penis?
Mark: I’m sure you’ll find out.
Evans’ stoic eyes aren’t on his nor Orlando’s championship belts though, they are focused sternly on the passing Matt Hodges. A smirk forms on Matt’s face as he walks without hesitation right past the Submission Champion, who obviously don’t take kindly to his presence. As soon as Matt marches through the curtains the determined, odd eyes of Evans shift towards Hurse, refocusing his attention on his anxious opponent. Hurse pivots between his feet with a little more pep in his step now that he has even more to prove. He watches as Evans climbs to the apron and begins to remove his title belt. He lifts the World Championship over the ropes and gives the official specific instructions not to let anyone but him leave with it before slipping into the ring.
Comeau: Evans not letting himself be distracted by that humungous shocker involving Matt Hodges, because he realizes just how much is on the line going into this BIG matchup. A match that has been in the making for well over a year culminates right here, right now for the Submission Championship.
Moore: Yay, this is going to be bigger than my nipples.
Mark: I’ll judge their size later.
Hurse anxiously waits in his corner for Pat Evans to slip through the ropes. Just as the Submission Champion enters the ring and lifts his belt up high above his head, Hurse shows no hesitation to charge up behind him delivering a hard clubbing blow between his shoulder blades. The shot knocks Evans forward into the cables, dropping his strap over the cables to the outside of the ring while the official jumps in Hurse’s way.
Comeau: Hurse getting in a cheap shot before the bell could sound.
Moore: How was it cheap, do attacks have prices? I knew it was like a video game where you could upgrade your attacks with money.
Mark: Um, yeah.
Pat spins around, spitefully glaring at Hurse who is backed to the center of the ring by referee Wright. A vengeful Pat now bolts forward as the two interlock arms in a classic collar elbow. They push and force each other around the ring in circles, hitting against the cables then backing into one of the turnbuckles. Hurse hits the corner hard spine first but then shoves his way out of it with both men still jockeying for positioning. Referee Princeton frantically tries to separate the two when Evans sticks his foot out, sweeping Hurse’s leg out from under him.
Hurse crashes onto his back while Pat drops down beside him, locking his arms around his neck in a modified side headlock. The Submission Champion tightly clamps on the hold, grinding his arms against the sides of Hurse’s head, literally rubbing his submission based superiority in his face.
Comeau: A hold now locked in by Evans, we’re going to be seeing a lot of these in perhaps the biggest submission title match in the history of the title.
Moore: I don’t like the belt, it’s too mysterious, who knows it’s motives?
Pat continues to grind his arms against Hurse’s skull when the former World Champion plants his feet to the canvas and actually bridges his way out of the side headlock. He turns around and takes Evans around the neck, pulling it backwards into a dragon sleeper. Hurse has the submission effectively established, attempting to wrench the neck as much as possible when Evans suddenly spins around, forcing his head into a front chancery. He now reaches down and picks Hurse’s ankle, lifting it into the air.
The former Submission Champion falls to his back with Evans trying unsuccessfully thus far to establish the ankle lock.
Comeau: Evans already going for one of his most potent offensive maneuvers.
Moore: It doesn’t look like Pat has a problem with potency, it’s why those little blue pills come in handy.
Hurse lifts his free foot into the air, hooking it around Pat’s forearm and then pulling forward on it. This causes Evans to bend forward just as Hurse sits up and catches him around the neck, rolling backwards and pulling the Submission Champion along with him. He has the front chancery still established as Pat sits up on the canvas, Hurse standing in front of him and trying to reach in with his legs. It appears that Hurse is now going for a combination front chancery, body scissors but Evans is blocking the legs from wrapping around his waist.
Despite Pat’s best efforts Hurse locks his legs in over top of the arms of Evans, who shockingly is still rising to his feet. The Submission Champion finds himself locked in a front chancery with his arms pinned to his sides by the body scissors formed by Pat’s legs. With a great display of strength Evans pushes his arms away from his sides and shoves the legs of Hurse upward, causing him to break the front chancery as well.
As a result Hurse lands right on top of Pat’s shoulders in a powerbomb position. As Evans goes to drag him down into the powerbomb the Master of Control wraps his legs tightly around Pat’s neck, locking in a triangle choke. Hurse falls to his back with Evans completely doubled over forward, trapped in the submission and gasping for air.
Comeau: Some more nice reversals from Hurse. This is just too odd, seeing Hurse on the offensive.
Moore: Usually he’s being thrown around like a ragdoll. And who makes dolls out of rags? I know I wouldn’t play with them.
Evans now reaches out for the cables, looking as if he’s on the verge of utilizing the first of three available rope breaks. An aggressive Hurse continues to exert as much strength as possible on the hold when Pat gives up on the ropes and flips forward. He breaks his head free from the legs of Hurse and drops to his seat beside him, clamping his arms immediately around his neck in another inverted side headlock.
Comeau: And it looks like we’re right back to where we started in this encounter with Evans again establishing that side headlock.
Hurse tries to bridge his back from the canvas yet again only to have Evans squeeze tighter on the hold. As a result Hurse falls to his back yet again, kicking his legs and trying desperately to free himself. Pat now lifts one of his fist into the air and begins to drive it repeatedly into Hurse’s face, trying to inflict as much punishment as possible.
The referee reprimands Evans for his use of the closed fist, distracting the Submission Champion long enough for Hurse to twist his body around so that he gets to his knees. His head is still trapped in the side headlock as he forces them both up to their feet.
The second they reach a standing base Hurse tries to rush in reverse into the cables and shoot Evans off of the side headlock. However, Pat stops this by dropping to a knee, cutting him off the second he began to move in reverse and maintaining that same domineering side headlock. Pat licks his chomps, enjoying the punishment he is inflicting as Hurse now forces himself back to an upright base, causing the Champion to stand as well.
He now throws a forearm into Evans’ kidneys, then delivers another shot, weakening Pat’s grasp. It takes one more hard shot for Evans’ grasp to weaken enough for Hurse to escape by dropping to his knees and crawling forward through Evans’ legs. As soon as he crawls through them he takes hold of Pat’s ankles, lifting them up into the air and tripping the Champion over backwards. The second Pat hits the canvas Hurse stands up and turns around, grabbing hold of his legs and tucking them under his armpits. He now tries to roll Evans over into the Legend Lock to a surprisingly loud ovation.
Comeau: Hurse going for the Legend Lock already. Both of these men busting out their trademark holds early on to inflict as much damage as possible.
Moore: They should just turn on an episode of Friends, that’s far more damaging than any submission.
The Champion and the Challenger find themselves at an impasse thus far, Hurse trying to get the Legend Lock established and Evans fighting to keep it from being locked in. Finally Pat does the smart, strategic thing, slipping across his back towards the ropes and then grabbing the cables.
Mark: Pat using his first rope break to prevent having any damage done to his body in the early stages of this Submission title match.
Moore: I hate strategy, it takes too much thought.
The official is trying his best to reason with Hurse who is still trying to establish the Legend Lock even though Evans has reached the ropes. Pat now bends his knees and pulls Hurse forward before wedging his feet to his opponent’s ribs and shoving him backwards. Hurse drops into a reverse roll and ends up on his feet while Evans starts to stand up with the use of the cables. As soon as the Submission Champion reaches his feet Hurse charges forward and grabs his legs, trying to lift them into the air for the Legend Lock.
An intense Evans begins to blast Hurse over the back again and again with clubbing blows while stumbling backwards into a corner. Hurse’s head ends up under Pat’s seat as he desperately tries to obtain his finishing hold, leaving him in perfect position for Evans to lift him up into the air into a crucifix position now. The crowd is screaming as Pat rushes forward to deliver his crucifix powerbomb, but he has no idea that Hurse has wrapped his legs around the top rope.
Pat steps forward to complete the move when he realizes he has nobody loaded on top of his shoulders, Hurse now seated on the top rope behind him. He turns around and charges at Hurse who suddenly back flips off of the top rope right over top of the inbound Evans. Hurse lands on his feet gracefully then charges at Evans who drops to his seat and catches the approaching Challenger’s leg, falling into a backwards roll.
Hurse crashes forward into the canvas as Pat stands up over top of his legs, bending it up into a Boston Leg Crab.
Comeau: Both men again going back and forth leading us into this Boston Crab from the Submission Champion.
Moore: How is it a crab, and why did it come from Boston?
Hurse pushes himself up onto the points of his elbows, roaring in pain and looking on the verge of tapping out already. Pat continues to bend Hurse’s leg at a very awkward angle as he claws and scratches his way towards the ropes, reaching out and grabbing the bottom one.
Mark: Now Hurse using his first rope break, only leaving him with two in what has been amatch strictly consisting of holds and counter holds thus far.
Moore: It’s like one of those games of Chess that always frightened me. It involves thought, and that’s horrifying.
Comeau: In your case I can see why that be scarier than a Tobe Hooper episode.
The official steps in and starts a five count, reaching four and finally causing Evans to break the submission. He maintained the hold as long as possible to inflict the greatest amount of damage. The Submission Champion now steps towards the center of the ring with both palms raised, acting innocent while the official is verbally reprimanding him.
He has no idea that Hurse is staggering up behind him, taking hold of his neck and setting up for the shellshock. He begins to drop back when Evans swings his cranium free from the predicament and drops to his knees behind the Challenger, snatching hold of his ankle. Pat lifts it up into the air and this time there is no avoiding it, Hurse being placed in the ankle lock.
Susie: Now Pat trying to shake hands with Hurse’s ankle, I think he’s got this backwards.
Comeau: No, he’s got the ankle lock established and this time there was no escaping it.
Roars of anguish emanate from Hurse who scrambles forward across the canvas, clawing his way in the direction of the ropes. His hand extends and wraps around the bottom rope, Pat again refusing to break the hold.
Comeau: Hurse already using two rope breaks, he’s only got one remaining and then those ropes will be useless.
Moore: They already are useless, they just stand there all day doing nothing. Lazy bastards with their purple skin and their shinny surface and their venereal diseases.
Again the official is demanding Pat break the submission as he starts a five count, yet Evans will not comply, even going as far as dragging his agonizing opponent back to the center of the ring. As he’s dragged Hurse begins to rise to one foot, hopping in place on it as his other ankle is being viciously ripped at. Now he jumps into the air and twists around, connecting with a stiff enzugari right to the side of Pat’s head, knocking him loopy.
The collision sends Evans staggering sideways into the ropes, falling against them then ricocheting off towards his opposition. He walks right into a hard right hand to the jaw from Hurse, who has seemingly abandoned trying to one up Pat via technical wrestling. The strike knocks Pat right back into the ropes as Hurse knees him to the ribs and begins to club him with both arms rabidly over his upper back.
Comeau: Look at this, Hurse has lost it and now he’s just clobbering Evans. So much for this being a technical masterpiece.
The official finally forces himself in between Evans and Hurse, wedging his shoulder to the Challenger’s ribs and shoving him backwards. Hurse hobbles on one foot as Evans now comes barreling out of the cables, looking to decapitate his opponent with the lariat. Hurse shoves the official out of the way and then ducks the lariat, Pat stepping behind him and spinning around right into a hard knife edge chop across the sternum.
The strike staggers Evans before he is chopped yet again with even greater force across the sternum. These blows cause the Champion to swing his arms in an attempt to remain upright as Hurse now boots him to the ribs and takes him around the neck. Hurse turns his back to Pat and begins to charge at the nearby turnbuckle, going for the Disinfectant (Sliced Bred Number 2). At the last second Pat shoves him off, sending Hurse charging into the turnbuckle then surprisingly jumping high enough into the air to land with grace on the top rope. He immediately springs from the turnbuckle and twists into a flying lariat that connects directly with Pat’s throat.
The impact almost knocks Evans inside out as he crashes onto his back and Hurse rolls forward across the canvas right to his feet. He now turns his side towards Pat and stomps his foot, anxiously setting up for some type of superkick.
Comeau: Hurse absolutely rolling right now.
Moore: I took a bunch of pills and rolled one time, but then I woke up in an alley and I was all sticky.
Hurse thrusts his hands into the air, calling for Pat to stand as he slowly complies. He just gets to his feet as Hurse steps in for the superkick but finds himself shocked as his ankle is caught in the hands of the Submission Champion. Pat captured the foot right before it could connect with his shin and he now tries to turn Hurse over into the ankle lock. That’s when Hurse jumps into the air, twisting his body and reaching back with his legs, tucking them under Pat’s armpits. He drops to the canvas upside down and pulls Evans into a forward roll up.
Hurse is seated on Pat’s chest and holding down on the back of his legs for a pin. Before the referee can correct him Hurse stands up and switches around behind the raised legs, taking hold of them and trying to establish the Legend Lock yet again. Once more Evans bends his knees, dragging Hurse forward then raking him right across the eyes and booting him directly to the jaw. The shot causes Hurse to start stumbling in reverse into the ropes, falling spine first against them in an incredibly groggy condition.
Pat rolls in reverse onto his feet and now comes charging in at Hurse, lifting his boot into the air for a yakuza kick. Just as the boot is on the verge of connecting Hurse steps out of the way, causing Pat’s leg to become trapped over the top rope. Hurse drops down behind him, catching hold of his pants and rolling him up into a school boy before standing and locking in the Legend Lock.
Comeau: Hurse has established the Legend Lock and at this point it might be enough to force Evans to tap out for the first time ever.
Moore: There’s a first time for everything.
Mark: That’s not true, I’m still waiting for you to say something remotely clever.
Evans pushes himself up onto the palms of his hands, his face twisting and tensing from the pain that courses through is body. His fingers dig deeply into the canvas as he begins to force himself across the ring towards the ropes which would be his only source of salvation in this contest. The crowd is on their feet screaming, wondering rather Pat is going to tap out or not before he launches himself forward and grabs the middle cable with both hands.
He desperately clings to the cables as the official forces Hurse to break the submission.
Comeau: And now Pat has used his second rope break, meaning both men are tied up and now can only use the cables one last time to escape a hold.
Moore: This is getting as dramatic as the anxious wait for my period.
Evans pulls himself up the ropes as Hurse again forces the referee out of the way, making a straight path for the Champion who meets his inbound opponent with a vicious back elbow. The blow connects straight with Hurse’s jaw, causing him to reel in reverse and try his best to stay upright.
Pat comes rushing out of the cables now when Hurse side steps him and goes for the step up enzugari. Evans ducks his head out of the way of Hurse’s boot though, causing the former Submission Champion to land on the canvas in front of him. The quick Pat charges backwards into the ropes, getting a running start yet again as he comes barreling towards his slowly rising opponent. Hurse has just reached a kneeling base when Pat steps off of his raised knee, going for a shinning boot stomp to the side of his cranium. Right as the boot is about to nail Hurse in the face he pulls his head back, avoiding it by mere inches.
As a result Pat lands on his feet in front of Hurse, the Challenger standing and taking him around the waist. Before Hurse can hit any type of move Pat performs a standing switch, getting behind him and then hooking his arm, hoisting his opponent into the air for the Spinal Tap. To Pat’s dismay Hurse reaches back with his leg, hooking it around his own and keeping from being hit with the vicious backbreaker. Hurse now twists his body like he’s going for the standing switch but instead hits a drop toe hold that sends Evans crashing into the canvas. As soon as he hits the ring Hurse dives forward, catching hold of both his opposition’s arms and bridging over into the Cattle Mutilation.
Mark: A big reversal leading into the Hands Across America submission.
Moore: BENTINA BEAKLEY!
Pat is grinding his teeth as his arms are stretched in a very awkward position. He tries to slither across the canvas towards the ropes and free himself from this predicament but he can’t reach the ropes, his foot continues to fall short of it. The intense Evans begins to stand up in the hopes of freeing himself, Hurse continuing to bridge over backwards establishing the Cattle Mutilation.
Unfortunately for the Challenger he is unable to keep Evans down as the Champ rises to his feet albeit bent over forward his arms continuing to be held in a double chickenwing. Now Pat stands completely upright, sending Hurse flipping over his back and landing on his feet directly behind him. Hurse now rushes forward as Evans turns and catches him with a tilt a whirl only to have it countered into a head scissors. Pat is flipped over completely and sent crashing into the canvas across his spine.
Comeau: Evans getting free but then walking right into that head scissors from the former Submission Champion. It looks like Hurse could be just too quick for the more methodical Evans.
Moore: I’m quick too, quicker than Angelina Jolie when she’s dodging a bullet, or adopting a baby.
Hurse rises to his feet with defiance clear in his eyes, stepping quickly towards Evans and grabbing him by the hair. His head is thrust under Hurse’s seat as he signals for the Sanitizer (Styles Clash). Before he can connect Pat swings his head free out from under Hurse’s seat then takes him by the wrist in the process. Pat now pulls Hurse forward into a short arm clothesline that the challenger ducks, getting behind Evans’ back and wrapping up his neck for the Shellshock yet again. This time Evans spins around and wedges his hands to Hurse’s ribs, shoving him off backwards. Hurse staggers in reverse but then charges forward at Pat who steps in and sweeps his leg out from under him, hitting a hard STO.
Hurse is driven painfully into the canvas with Pat kneeling at his side, a twisted expression on his face. The defending Champion now stands and rushes into the ropes, bouncing off and coming back in at Hurse. To his disbelief Hurse rolls towards Pat and catches him by the ankle then rolls away from his opposition. This roll causes Pat to be tripped forward, landing on all fours with Hurse standing up behind him establishing the ankle lock.
Comeau: Now Hurse has got the ankle lock applied on Evans, the very man he groomed for so long to join the Alpha Generation.
Moore: He stole that move, that makes him a thief, a big nasty, stinky thief, just like half of my family.
Evans grinds his forehead against the canvas to block the pain before looking up desperately towards the ropes. His eyes center on the cables as he begins to drag his body towards them, Hurse still wrenching and tearing with everything he’s worth at the ankle. Finally Pat finds himself mere inches from the cables and on the verge of tapping to one of his own holds. That’s when he finally reaches out and grabs the bottom rope to screams from the crowd.
Mark: And somehow Pat has got those ropes, using his very last break. That means Pat can no longer use the ropes to escape holds. I don’t remember a time I’ve ever seen Pat’s Submission title in this type of jeopardy.
Moore: I’d watch Jeopardy, but Alex Tribeck is a Canadian.
Hurse is exasperated by the news that Evans didn’t tap as Pat starts to stand with the use of the cables. The quick witted, at times, Hurse slips through the ropes in front of Evans then drops down to his knees beside him on the apron. He grabs Pat’s head and pulls it down throat first against the middle rope now employing the cables to lock in submission holds.
Moore: Those lazy ropes finally doing some work.
Comeau: Hurse now legally allowed to use the cables to apply submissions and it didn’t take him very long to do so.
Hurse continues to strangle Evans against the ropes, hoping it will finally be enough to regain the title he gave to Pat close to a year ago. As his throat is wrenched against the cables pain emits from Evans’ twisted features but he will not tap out. Hurse now breaks the submission, stepping back then rushing across the apron going for a kick to the side of Evans’ skull. Pat pulls his head back and avoids the kick, Hurse’s spine pressing to the cables as a result.
He has no time to react before his arms are hooked from behind by Evans and he’s lifted over the cables. Pat rushes forward and throws Hurse with a crucifix bomb half the length of the ring.
Mark: From the Outside In by Pat Evans, possibly taking Hurse completely out of this contest now.
Moore: MAGICA DE SPELL!
The impact with the canvas leaves Hurse writhing in anguish as Evans staggers towards him and steps through the legs. He wraps them around his own and rolls Hurse to his stomach, locking in the sharpshooter to a both boos and cheers from the gathered masses. Roars of anguish emanate from Hurse as he pushes himself up onto his palms, shaking his head and sending sweat flying in all directions.
The screams from the crowd escalate as Hurse desperately begins to pull himself across the ring in the direction of the ropes, looking to free himself. His hand reaches out with twiddling fingers for the bottom cable when Evans drags him back to the center of the ring then sits down even further on the sharpshooter. Anguish emanates from every inch of Hurse’s body as he finds himself closer and closer to the point of tapping out.
Moore: Those ropes were almost useful again but they refused to help Hurse this time.
Comeau: Um, yeah. Hurse on the verge of grabbing the ropes only to be pulled back to the center of the ring. I don’t know how much longer he can hang in there.
Anguish courses through his body as Hurse pushes himself up onto his palms, glaring at the ropes desperately. He crawls across the canvas towards the cables as Evans sits down further on the sharpshooter, twisting his body up brutally.
Mark: Is this how it’s going to end, is Hurse going to tap out?
Moore: He’s not even wearing dancing shoes.
Although his frame may be exasperated Hurse begins to force himself towards the ropes, reaching out for the bottom one with quivering fingers. He is still a few inches away as Evans leans even further back on the hold, hoping to earn the submission. The crowd is standing, wondering rather their about to witness a submission or one final rope break. Finally Hurse lunges forward and wraps his hand around the bottom cable to a deafening roar from the fans.
Susie: Look he grabbed them ropes.
Mark: Brilliant observation. Hurse has grabbed the ropes for the last time in this match, now neither man can use the cables to escape submissions.
The former World Champion’s body is left in a horrid condition as Evans breaks the sharpshooter and spins around. He stomps down to the kidneys of Hurse then drags him up to his feet, wedging his shoulder to his spine. Hurse is lifted into the air then driven down hard into the canvas with a back drop driver.
Hurse sits up on the canvas looking at the point of unconsciousness yet slowly starts to rise to his feet. He gets one foot on the canvas and keeps his other knee to the ring when Evans charges in. He steps off of Hurse’s raised knee and delivers a deadly boot right to the side of the former Champion’s face. The kick has knocked Hurse out it appears, leaving him laying across the canvas while Pat sits up, sweating and appearing quite flustered.
Comeau: And now that shinning kick has rendered Hurse unconscious. Pat is seemingly seconds away from retaining the Submission title.
Hurse lays on the canvas with fluttering eyes as Evans steps in and takes him by the hair, forcing him up to his feet. The Challenger looks to be dead weight as Evans rather arrogantly begins to apply the Time to Go to Sleep. His arms begin to be wrapped around Hurse’s throat when the Alpha Gen member begins to shove his way backwards. He pushes Evans in reverse and drives him spine first directly into the turnbuckle but Pat will not stop trying to apply the hold.
As a result Hurse drops to his knees and arm drags Evans right over top of his head into a forward roll. Pat ends up back on his feet as Hurse launches himself out of the corner into a twisting European Uppercut. It connects right across Evans’ jaw and sends him down to the canvas once again.
Both men lay on the ring sweating profusely and trying to find the will power to stand up. Although every inch of his body is hurting Hurse gets to his feet and limps towards the cables, slipping through them onto the apron. Evans just starts to show signs of movement when Hurse springs to the top rope and now flies off, looking for a big splash. Pat rolls out of the way at the last second, causing Hurse to duck his head and drop into a forward roll.
Comeau: It looks like both men are getting that second wind.
Moore: That’s gross. Someone get some air deodorizer.
Mark: Not breaking wind, getting a “second wind.”
Hurse ends up back on his feet when Evans comes charging in with a forearm that the Challenger ducks. Pat spins to face Hurse and is caught around the neck, his opponent dragging him towards the corner for the Disinfectant (Sliced Bread Number 2). He steps up the corner and flips over backwards only to have Evans grab the top rope, holding onto them and blocking being hit with the move.
Hurse flips over and lands on his feet as Evans comes charging out of the corner and is caught around the legs. They are swept out from under him, Evans crashing onto his back as Hurse tries to establish the Legend Lock.
Mark: Legend Lock on the verge of being established!
Moore: This could be bad for Pat right?
Comeau: Duh.
Evans suddenly rolls to his side, sending Hurse flying through the cables to the apron. He lands on his seat and grabs the middle rope, keeping from crashing to the outside mats. He stands up and holds the top cable as Evans rises to his feet as well. As soon as they both stand up Hurse springs to the top rope yet again only to have Evans reach up, grabbing his hand and pulling him down across his shoulders in a fireman’s carry.
Pat rushes across the ring setting up for the Death Valley Driver when Hurse displays his agility by shoving himself up into the air and transitioning his body. He lands in a seated position on top of Pat’s shoulders, going for the hurricarana only to be countered into a powerbomb backbreaker right across Evans’ raised knee. Hurse’s back is almost shattered as a result of this move, causing him to flip over backwards and land on his knees.
Evans takes him around the jaw, leading him up to his feet and shooting his arm across his chest. He is now lifted into the air and brought down with a modified Spinal Tap right across Pat’s knee.
Comeau: Two absolutely VICIOUS backbreakers by Evans!
Moore: Hurse is dead, he’s deader than Paulie Shore’s career.
Hurse falls to the canvas across his back as Evans immediately grabs his legs, rolling him over onto his stomach. He steps over Hurse’s back and applies the Legend Lock to squeals from the crowd. Everyone rises to their feet as Evans has got Hurse placed in his own hold.
Mark: And to add insult to injury Evans has got Hurse in his own Submission!
Moore: I thought injuries were insulting enough.
Hurse shakes his head as the official askes him rather he submits or not. Obviously the Master of Control is refusing to give up as he drags his agonizing, brutalized body towards the ropes. Evans has the Legend Lock tightly clamped on as Hurse reaches out for the cables and grabs them. The official informs Hurse that he has no remaining rope breaks, leading Evans to drag his opponent away from the ropes to the center of the ring. There is no other alternative at this point for Hurse as he lifts his hand into the air and begins to tap the canvas repeatedly.
Comeau: Hurse tapping out to the Legend Lock!
Moore: Someone finally submitted? I thought I was going to be here all night.
Boos and cheers are heard from the crowd as Evans releases Hurse and then staggers forward into the ropes. He falls on them for support as sweat seeps down his face and his diabolical eyes lock on the aching Hurse. The Alpha member rolls to his back, laying there in almost an unconscious condition, his spine absolutely ripped to shreds thanks to his own hold.
Comeau: Evans again retains the Submission title in perhaps his hardest fought title match yet. Hurse gave it his all and surprisingly put up a worthwhile challenge but in the end it just wasn’t enough.
Susie: It’s never enough unless you have love on your side.
Mark: Um….what?
The fans are still screaming over what they just witnessed as the Submission title belt is handed to Evans. He lifts the gold up high, resulting in even more boos from the sold out Manhattan Center. Finally the Championship falls onto Pat’s shoulder and his smirking features shift to the outraged Hurse. The Master of the Control is shivering, his features turning a bright shade of red as he realizes he was just forced to tap out to one of his greatest rivals. The official now hands over the World Championship to Evans as well, which he also lords over Hurse even though he is not the rightful title holder.
A JOKE?
Hodges: Tsk, tsk, that was lamer than a corporate stable storyline.
THE Matt Hodges continues to stare into a monitor while occupying a backstage corridor. His head shakes with disappointment as he views the conclusion to the last Submission title match. However, he now realizes he’s the one on the very monitor he’s been watching. This prompts Matt to wave his palm in front of his face to see if his image on the television does the same thing. In the end he sighs and searches his surroundings.
Matt: Damn mysterious cameramen, how do they always know where I’m going to be? What a joke this place is…
NYAH!
Matt jumps slightly as a Ladder baring Hellkat magically appears behind him. Confusion sets in on the former SCW World Champion at the sight of the heavily tattooed and diabolical kitty.
Hellkat: So your Matt Hodges huh?
She looks him over before shaking her head.
Hellkat: I’m not impressed. You don’t have horns, a third eye, six nipples or anything.
Hodges: Um, sorry?
Hellkat: You should be. It’s not often that people get the chance to impress me. You better be able to wiggle your earlobes or pop your eyeballs out of your head or this was a complete waste of my time.
Matt: Yes, and I imagine your time is better spent clawing drapes or yacking something up on expensive braided rugs.
Hellkat: EXACTLY. Now listen up Hodgie, the IWC is no joke, unless you count Dan Douglas’ unusual eggplant shaped penis. How could it could be when you have remarkable talent like me, Desolation, or the former Cartel Champion Ladder?
Hodges takes a moment to think about what he’s heard.
Matt: Well if you put it that way then there’s OBVIOUSLY no room for me to judge.
Hellkat: Ladder would show you just how wrong your preconceived notions of IWC are if it weren’t battling a horrid case of depression. Speaking of which, it’s time for your Abilify treatment.
Hellkat sets the Ladder upright and digs into her pocket, retrieving a thing of pills. She opens the bottle and pours the pills between the rungs where they scatter across the floor. Finally she turns her attention back towards Hodges.
Hellkat: Make yourself USEFUL and grab Ladder some water. The last thing we need is for it to choke on its pills.
Hodges, Hodges, Hodges....
A loud reaction cuts throughout the crowd as Johnny Kingdom saunters up behind Hodges, placing his hand directly on his shoulder. Matt glances down at the palm invading his personal space but the longest reigning World Champion in IWC history doesn’t remove it. His other hand hides something mysteriously behind his back.
Johnny Kingdom: Damn glad to meet you. Although I’m sure you already know who I am.
Matt: Dolph Ziggler?
Kingdon: Noooo, but I’ll excuse your ignorance this time because I have an acquaintance that is just dying to meet you.
Hodges closes his eyes and shakes his head.
Hodges: I knew I shouldn’t have hung around to watch that match.
Kingdom: Matt Hodges, please say hello to the new Cartel Champion, and a close personal friend of mine, the Cartel title belt.
The strap is removed from behind Kingdom’s back and held out towards Matt who appears dumbfounded.
Johnny: With champions like the Cartel belt there’s no way you can call this company a joke.
Matt: OF COURSE…thanks for showing me the error of my ways.
He rolls his eyes while an angered Hellkat lunges forward, carrying the Ladder along with her.
Hellkat: The AUDACITY of you Kingdom! How dare you flaunt the new champion in front of Ladder, who mind you is the REAL greatest Cartel champ of all times.
Kingdom: Pfft, come off it Hellkat. The Cartel title pinned Ladder fair and square on the last Riot!, just like I’m going to do to your husband later tonight, so no more belly aching.
Hellkat wraps her arms around Ladder’s struts, acting as if she’s holding it back.
Hellkat: No Ladder he’s not worth it. Desolation will take care of his Patrick Stewart head, you’ve got a group therapy session to get to.
Hellkat turns and sticks her tongue out at Kingdom before carrying the former Cartel Champion away. Matt watches all of this with increasingly bewildered eyes while Johnny now slaps him on the back.
Kingdom: Your going to love it here.
After making this claim the Team Leader and the Cartel Champion both depart, leaving Hodges with an unsure look on his face.
Hodges: Well, I should be right a home after the mandatory electroshock treatments.
Hodges begrudgingly reaches into his pocket and fishes out a spork that he lifts in front of his eyes.
Matt: You know, it’s pretty sad that you’ll be champion here before I am.
JASON WHEELER VS. RIGGS
“The End of All Hope” starts to play over the PA system before the name “Wheeler” flashes over the big screen. At the sight of this the fans cannot help but to erupt, rising to their feet with their arms held high as Jason Wheeler strolls onto the stage, overlooking his screaming admirers. He crouches briefly while eying the ring in a cat like manner and now pounces down the ramp. He reaches the ringside area and slides in under the ropes, crawling across it then doing a headstand before nipping up onto his feet. The Black Cat jumps to a turnbuckle, looking out over the crowd who is relishing this opportunity to see the former six time SCW World Champion.
Mark: Well, we go from one cat to another as “The Black Cat” sets to square off with the man who’s been his partner over the past few weeks in Riggs.
Susie: There are far too many cats running around here, I feel like one of those crazy old ladies who can only find love by having a gagillion felines.
Comeau: Perhaps, but what makes this match so interesting is what went down on the last Riot! between these two, where tensions really escalated when Riggs accidentally superkicked Wheeler through a table. On top of that he unintentionally screwed Wheeler out of a victory against Johnny Kingdom. There’s going to be some real animosity going into his one.
Wheeler sits on the top rope, his arms crossed and his eyes focused on the entry way in anticipation of his opposition. His head is titled and a bit of anger resides in his eyes. The arena drops into total darkness, the piano intro to“The Sacrament” by HIM begins to play and smoke appears in the entrance way. As the songs kicks in purple lights come on and Riggs comes walking out from the smoke. He stands on the rampway for a few seconds and throws one arm into the air before making his down to the ring.
Comeau: Here comes a man who I didn’t think would be willing to trust anyone after his association with AWOL, yet somehow he found common ground with Wheeler. However, we’ve seen that common ground become a little more rocky as of late.
Moore: I love rocks, especially pebbles because they can fit in my nostrils.
Mark: Interesting but irrelevant. Riggs has had some reasons to be upset with Wheeler lately as well, as he felt Jason was jeopardizing their tag title match by entering that Cartel title gauntlet on the last Riot! Let’s see if that tension escalates here tonight.
The crowd is energized as Riggs and Jason Wheeler stand across from each other ready to collide for the very first time in IWC history. A strange, bemused smirk inhabits Wheeler’s face as he begins to do some fancy foot work, moving back and forth in front of the stoic, stationary Riggs. The bell now sounds as the two cautiously approach each other.
Comeau: Here we go with the first time ever meeting of Riggs and Jason Wheeler. This could be the show stealer.
Moore: Someone’s going to steal the show? I thought downloading without pay was illegal, Lars Ulrich is so gonna sue someone.
Wheeler finally remains still long enough to extend his hand, looking for a friendly, respectful shake. Riggs glares down into the open palm before reciprocating the handshake. He almost immediately transitions from the handshake into an arm ringer however, twisting the wrist of Wheeler and causing him to double over.
Riggs: There are no friends in this match Jason.
Wheeler ducks his head into a forward roll but then drops to his back, lying stretched across the canvas. He quickly nips up to his feet and grabs the shirt of the nearby official Fitzpatrick, using him to flip his body completely over backwards. Jason lands gracefully on his feet and reverses the wrist lock before tugging on Riggs’ arm and dragging him forward into a side headlock.
Comeau: Wheeler with an impressive showcase of his speed.
Moore: He’s faster than Sonic the Hedgehog, and there aren’t even any rings or Dr. Robotnic.
Riggs proves he can be just as quick as his opponent by pulling Jason backwards into the ropes. Both men hit into the cables with Riggs trying to push Jason forward and free himself from the side headlock. However, Jason reaches back and wraps his hand around the top cable, avoiding being slingshot across the ring. With his other arm he maintains the side headlock submission, refusing to relinquish either the hold or his grasp on the ropes.
As a result Riggs uses all of his strength to stand up, holding Wheeler in a back drop position. The ever so sudden Wheeler shifts his weight and ends up coming down over the ropes onto the apron feet first. He maintains the side headlock all the while until the official steps in, demanding that he break it. As soon as he does Riggs stands up and takes Jason by the back of the head, rushing him across the apron towards the exposed turnbuckle post.
Comeau: This is going to end badly for Wheeler.
Moore: Just like the ending to No Country for Old Men.
Wheeler is on the verge of being slammed face first into the post before he steps up the outside of the turnbuckle and now stands on the top cable. He walks across it with a shocked Riggs looking up at him then launches himself off landing straight on top of his opponent’s sternum with a seated pancha. Riggs crashes onto his back with Wheeler ducking his head and rolling forward across the canvas right back to his feet.
Susie: That was impressive. He walked those ropes just like the Undertaker. Well, if the Undertaker were a midget.
Wheeler stands back wearing a wavering smile on his face, somewhat dejected by the pain he’s inflicted on his partner. A stunned Riggs sits up holding his chest as Wheeler steps in and clamps on another side headlock submission. This time he’s got it applied even tighter before Riggs launches a forearm right into his kidneys, then does so again.
Now he pushes Jason off into the cables when Wheeler jumps into the air, landing feet first on the second rope. He moves like he’s about to launch himself off the ropes into a crossbody, prompting Riggs to drop down out of the way. However, Wheeler tricked him, he remains standing on the second rope and now launches himself from the cables, twisting around into an attempted leg drop on his laid out adversary. His leg misses it’s mark, Riggs rising to his knees to avoid it right as Jason crashes posterior first to the ring in front of him.
He rolls to his elbows and knees reaching for his rump when Riggs dives over his back, catching him around the neck and thigh then rolling him over into a Oklahoma roll.
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Jason kicks out, dropping over knees first to the canvas as Riggs stands in front of him. He begins to step in and deliver a kick to the prone head of Wheeler but Jason quickly snatches hold of his opponent’s legs then dives forward. Riggs crashes onto his back with Wheeler flipping over into a jackknife cover.
1
Riggs uses all of his strength to bridge his body up off of the canvas as well as the full weight of Wheeler who remains laid out across the Painted Warrior’s chest.
Comeau: What a display of Riggs’ strength, a physical trait he’ll have to employ against the wicked quick Wheeler.
Moore: I have a lot of physical traits I can use against Wheeler.
Mark: Your breasts may be effective weapons but I think they’d be powerless against Wheeler.
Both men stand up as Riggs quickly twists around, swinging Wheeler along with him so that both of their backs are wedged against each other. He now tries to drag Jason down into a back slide only for the former 6 time SCW World Champion to flip completely over backwards. He lands on his feet right in front of Riggs then rushes forward and drops into a baseball slide between his legs. Jason ends up behind Riggs, grabbing him around the thigh to roll him up into a school boy.
Somehow Riggs keeps his feet planted, reaching down and forcing the arm away from his thigh then twisting to face the laid out Wheeler. He pulls up on the arm, forcing Jason to nip up to his feet before twisting to wedge his back against the Black Cat’s, pulling him down into a back slide pin.
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Wheeler kicks out and ends up dropping over backwards through the ropes knees first onto the apron. He quickly rises to his feet and grabs the top cable, lunging over it. Before he can make it all the way over the top rope however, Riggs jumps into the air, meeting him with a dropkick right to the sternum. As a result Wheeler is swatted out of the air, his light body crashing with devastating results to the outside mats.
Moore: Wheeler attacking Riggs’ feet.
Comeau: No, no, no. Wheeler was dropkicked out of the air by Riggs in a truly disturbing fashion. To little surprise it seems Riggs has Wheeler’s high flying offense well scouted in this match.
Susie: Scouted? I tried to join the scouts once, but they said they don’t accept 22 year olds.
A stunned Wheeler starts to stand up on the outside of the ring, gripping at his chest while Riggs slips through the ropes onto the apron. He now rushes across it and dives off into a twisting back elbow that connects with Wheeler’s battered chest, both men crashing to the mats. The crowd groans as a result of this high flying move while Riggs rises to a knee, delaying any further offense due to his internal confliction. Obviously he’s suffering mental stress with every blow he delivers to the man who has been there for him over the past few months.
Nevertheless Riggs keeps on him as Jason rolls to a crawling base, desperately trying to stand up. That’s when Riggs reaches down, wrapping his arms around his waist and lifting him into the air in almost a wheel barrow position. Riggs now turns and throws Wheeler down from the wheel barrow position chest first across the top edge of the steel barricade.
Moore: BIGTIME BEAGLE!
Comeau: AHH, what a painful move delivered by Riggs. Apparently friendship is not going to get in either man’s way of winning this match.
Jason rolls around covering the very same sternum that suffered extensive damage at the hands of Johnny Kingdom many weeks ago. Riggs hesitantly stomps at his weakened chest and takes him by the hair, rolling him slowly to his feet. He rolls Wheeler into the ring and breaks referee Fitzpatrick’s ten count. The painted warrior slides in and now rushes forward, jumping into the air then coming down spine first right across Jason’s ribs and sternum, connecting with a back first senton splash. After connecting he leans back, hooking both of Wheeler’s legs.
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Wheeler still has the strength to get his shoulder up, kicking out right before the three count. He rolls away from Riggs to his knees, still gripping at his chest as the painted warrior stands up in front of him. Riggs now rushes forward and delivers a running kick right to Jason’s chest, possibly caving it in and causing him to crash onto his back as a result.
Riggs’ spine faces Wheeler now as he prepares for the standing moonsault. He balances himself before flipping, which proves to be detrimental, as it gives Jason enough time to sit up and hook him around the thigh, pulling him down into the school boy successfully this time.
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Riggs launches his shoulder from the canvas, kicking out.
Comeau: Jason almost catching his partner with a school boy.
Moore: Now their using school boys? I thought only Michael Jackson and Catholic Priests did that.
Riggs drops over onto his knees with Wheeler standing up in front of him, swinging around for a dangerous kick to his head. At the last second Riggs ducks forward avoiding the kick causing Wheeler’s back to be aimed towards him. The Painted Warrior stands and grabs Jason by the back of the head, charging him forward across the ring then throwing him down into a slide, where he ends up connecting sternum first against the exposed turnbuckle post. The crowd squeals as Wheeler slides right under the turnbuckle pads and hits the steel with devastating force, all of the air is taken out of his body as a result.
Comeau: That had to inflict some serious damage to Jason’s sternum, which was the focal point of Johnny Kingdom’s offense in that stellar one on one encounter from several weeks ago.
Jason is dragged out from under the turnbuckle by Riggs, who then stands him up and wedges his shoulder to his spine. Riggs rushes forward, pushing Wheeler along sternum first right into the top turnbuckle pad. The collision inflicts even further damage to the chest of the Black Cat who is dragged backwards out of the corner by Riggs who still has his shoulder wedged to the lower back of his opponent. Riggs charges him forward at the corner again but this time Jason reaches down wrapping his arm around his neck then stepping up the turnbuckle and launching himself off into a tornado bulldog. The stunned Riggs is driven face first into the canvas, causing him to roll onto his back looking lifeless.
Mark: That was just the counter Wheeler needed to get himself back into this matchup.
Moore: Oh, that poor sad clown was hurt. Maybe he should juggle to make me feel better.
Jason sits up with his arms crossed over his sternum, wincing from the pain as he rises to his feet at a deliberate pace. From the corner of his eye he spots Riggs also ascending to his feet with the use of the cables. This prompts Jason to come spinning towards him going for a back fist that would surely inflict a great deal of damage to the already battered face of his opposition.
Riggs ducks forward and catches him against his shoulder’s however, back dropping Wheeler over the ropes. Somehow the damaged Black Cat grabs the top rope and floats over onto the apron, landing right on his feet. Hw now ducks his head and flips over the top rope so that his legs land right on top of Riggs’ shoulders, pulling him around into a huge head scissors. Riggs flips completely over and crashes hard against the ring.
Mark: Modified head scissors from Wheeler, hotshoting him back onto the offensive.
Moore: I find your breath offensive Mark. Almost as offensive as a Kirk Cameron movie.
Comeau: Blasted Christianity.
Riggs arches his back from the ring and slowly rises to his feet as Wheeler spins around going for a back heel kick. However, Riggs catches his ankle, keeping him from connecting and prompting Jason to lunge into the air with an enzugari kick. The stiff strike not only echoes throughout the building but sends Riggs stumbling into the corner, falling against it for support. He rests on his head on the top turnbuckle pad as Wheeler comes barreling towards him, jumping into the air for some type of knee strike to the back of his head.
Riggs steps out of the way at the last second, causing Wheeler’s knee to miss the back of his head. The Black Cat now stands on the second rope when Riggs catches him by the tights and hooks him around the leg. He tries to pull Jason down into the school boy off of the turnbuckle when Wheeler surprisingly flips over backwards, landing with grace on his feet.
Moore: REMARKABLE! I can fit a whole bologna sandwich into my mouth.
Comeau: I’m sure your mouth’s ability to hold large objects has benefited you in the past.
Before Riggs can even react Wheeler charges forward and lunges into the air, nailing a front dropkick directly to his face. Both boots slam viciously against his forehead, knocking him into a seated position in the corner while Wheeler rolls in reverse back to his feet. With ferocious intent he now rushes forward and connects with a high impact knee directly into Riggs’ face.
Comeau: Wheeler really turning on the aggression in this one Susie.
Riggs looks discombobulated by these impacts to his head as Wheeler drags him out of the corner and falls into the lateral press.
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Riggs launches his shoulder from the canvas, kicking out and then immediately trying to get to his feet. As soon as he stands up Jason takes him around the neck in a side headlock, rushing forward to nail the bulldog. At the last second Riggs shoves him off, sending Wheeler into the cables that he now jumps into. He lands feet first on the middle cable, springing off it and twisting towards Riggs who has the strength to catch his opponent, pulling him down out of mid flight.
Riggs pushes Wheeler around into a fallaway rock bottom position only to twist Jason around and drop him sternum first right across his knee.
A gasp emanates from Wheeler, unable to catch his breath now that his chest has almost been caved in. Riggs keeps his arm inter-tangled with Wheeler’s, standing up and pushing Jason to his feet. He now spins towards Wheeler, taking him around the back of the head and dropping into a sit-out jawbreaker. Jason’s jaw bounces right off of his cranium, sending him staggering backwards into the ropes. He bounces off of them and then comes back in at Riggs who catches him across the chest and thigh, throwing him up high into the air. Riggs steps out of the way as Wheeler comes crashing down sternum and stomach first into the ring from a tremendous height.
Comeau: Wheeler’s chest again being decimated.
Moore: He’s gonna need breast implants. They cushion falls.
After the impact Wheeler pops up onto his knees, covering his sternum with both arms and looking up in time to see Riggs jumping to the middle cable. He stands up to stop him but Riggs is to quick, springing from the central rope and twisting around into the Tidal Wave. The kick connects with such sheer force to Jason’s face that it sends him flipping over backwards and crashing to the ring across his stomach.
Mark: That was a kick of epic proportions. It turned Wheeler inside out.
Moore: That happens when kids swing all the way over the top of a swing-set, for REAL they had a show about it and everything.
Comeau: That was a claymation show on Nickelodeon you human wasteland.
Riggs now scrambles into the lateral press as quickly as his aching body will allow.
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Again Jason gets his shoulder up, kicking out right before the three count could be made. As a result Riggs rises to his knees, the paint melting from his face, dissolved by the sweat seeping from his forehead. He stands up blocking out the agony while taking Wheeler by the hair, forcing his head under his seat and wrapping his arms around his waist. Riggs lifts Jason up for the powerbomb but then falls backwards, face planting him directly into the canvas.
The Ollyoop version of the powerbomb leaves Wheeler draped over the canvas unresponsive, Riggs again crawling into the cover. He pushes him onto his back and hooks the leg, hoping it will finally be enough.
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No! Again Jason launches his shoulder from the ring in defiance, leaving Riggs to sit up asking what it will take to put down the man he’s trusted for so long.
Mark: Once again Riggs was on the verge of victory, he almost had Wheeler finished off via another blow to that sternum.
Moore: This is just like whack a mole, I never win.
Riggs forcefully drags Wheeler up to his feet and then clobbers him to the jaw before delivering a vicious knife edge chop right across his sternum. Jason almost falls over due to the impact while Riggs takes him by the wrist and whips him into he ropes. At the last conceivable second Wheeler jumps onto the middle cable though and springs off, twisting towards Riggs for a moonsault. Somehow the Painted Warrior is able to catch Jason yet again, this time across his shoulder.
The crowd erupts as Wheeler is on the verge of being nailed with the Hopskotch. Riggs begins to pull Wheeler down into the Michinoku Driver II when Jason catches him around the neck. He swings his body around and counters into a devastating DDT. The top of Riggs’ head is driven viciously into the canvas before he rolls onto his back. Both men lay on the canvas now breathing heavily.
Comeau: Jason hitting an essential counter, fighting out of the Hopskotch into that DDT.
Moore: But their both like turtles, they can’t get up.
Mark: Your partially right because neither man is responsive at this point.
Wheeler and Riggs are struggling towards their feet, exasperated at this point. They are physically drained upon reaching an upright base when Wheeler slugs his opponent across the jaw. Riggs wavers back and forth before he lunges in with a knee to Wheeler’s ribs, doubling his opponent over and then whipping him into the turnbuckle. Jason turns and hits the corner hard spine first when Riggs comes charging towards him, jumping into the air for a knee strike. Wheeler steps out of the way at the last second, causing Riggs to now be standing almost on top of the turnbuckle when Jason rushes up behind him.
The Black Cat lunges into the air, landing on top of Riggs’ shoulders then dropping back into a super reverse frankensteiner. Riggs crashes right on top of his head to a loud collection of screams from the crowd.
Comeau: OHHH, REVERSE-RANA FROM THE TOP ROPE!
Moore: GYRO GEARLOOSE!!
Riggs flops onto his back, laying there completely motionless as Wheeler crawls into the cover, hooking both legs immediately.
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3!
The excited fans jump out of their seats at the sight of Riggs launching his shoulder from the ring at the last second.
Comeau: You’ve got to be kidding me! Even after the reverse rana off the top rope, Riggs kicked out! Neither man wants to go down here tonight.
Susie: There’s a lot of times I didn’t want to go down on people either. But you put in your protective tooth guard and do the job.
Wheeler’s despair escalates after this shocking kick out, leaving him to sit on the canvas with sullen eyes. Riggs rolls from side to side, trying his best to block out the pain and stand up. Jason alleviates his suffrage to provide more of it by leading Riggs up to his feet. He leads him to his feet and whips him into the ropes, Riggs bouncing off and stumbling towards him. Riggs is caught by the chest and stomach then thrown into the air for the sky high press, causing the crowd to squeal.
Their reaction intensifies as Riggs counters by landing right on top of Wheeler’s shoulders and snapping back into a hurricarana. Wheeler flips forward, slamming across his back and sending shockwaves of pain rushing through his body.
Comeau: Another unbelievable counter. These two men might no every kink in the other’s armor after working together for so many weeks.
Riggs pushes himself to his elbows and knees, paint draining from his face to the canvas below. It takes much of his remaining energy but he finally stands up, turning in time to spot an upright Wheeler. Jason’s palm is pressed to his back yet he doesn’t stop him from charging forward right into a jumping shin kick right to his face. Wheeler crumbles to the canvas but quickly rolls to his feet, trying to maintain this last pint of energy. He staggers incoherently towards Riggs who snatches him up into the air for the Hopskotch Number 2.
The fans are stunned before Wheeler twists his body, reaching out with his legs and hooking them around Riggs’ far arm. The other arm of his opponent is hooked with one of Wheeler’s own as he falls towards the canvas, catching Riggs with a shocking crucifix pin.
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3
Exuberant emotions are displayed from the standing crowd, stunned by this surprisingly pinfall from Jason Wheeler that came seemingly out of nowhere.
Comeau: Wheeler just CAUGHT Riggs ironically with the CRUCIFIX pin! This match is over. Jason’s victorious.
Susie: Oh my, he had to crucify Riggs to beat him? I didn’t even see a giant wooden cross anywhere.
HONOR
Riggs kicked out just a second too late and now finds himself kneeling on the canvas, staring a hole into the celebrating Wheeler. Obviously the painted warrior has no idea what to think while the official holds Jason Wheeler’s arm up high in victory. Jason staggers around the ring, reaching for his possibly cracked sternum but pushing all the pain aside to embrace his joy.
After one of the toughest matches on his career Wheeler would like to continue celebrating, but instead he stops and extends his hand. The crowd applauds Wheeler for this honorable gesture as he opens his palm towards the kneeling Riggs. Confusion sweeps over his painted face as his eyes adjust to take in Wheeler’s somewhat stoic face.
Comeau: What a gesture from Jason Wheeler to his partner. Even though they just decimated each other there’s no reason they still can’t be sportsmen.
Moore: Why can’t we be friends, why can’t we be friends?
Mark: Dear lord, you sound worse than Bjork.
Adrenaline still flows through both athletes yet his doesn’t stop Riggs from reaching up to take Wheeler’s hand. Their palms interlock when Jason is blindsided from behind by the gigantic Psycho.
Comeau: ARGH, Psycho coming out of nowhere and laying Jason Wheeler OUT!
Susie: Yay, it’s that big cuddly psychopath.
The fans are stunned by what they are seeing as Psycho has just driven an exhausted Jason to the canvas via a brutal forearm shot. Riggs stares up at Psycho in confusion, clearly shocked by his behavior. He lunges to his feet and grabs an intense, shivering Psycho by the shoulder, spinning him around so that they are face to face.
Riggs: WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?!
The drained Riggs doesn’t take kindly to what Psycho just did to his partner. For some reason the disturbed, irrational Psycho doesn’t speak a single solitary word, instead an unsettling smile begins to form on his scarred face. A demonic twinkle resonates in the back of his dark eyes which reflect the confused Riggs’ face.
Mark: What is Psycho’s motivation for attacking Jason Wheeler?
Moore: I haven’t got a clue, but can I buy a vowel?
Comeau: Uh, no.
Susie: Okay, I’ll solve then.
Both men turn away from each other when they spot Jason starting to will himself upwards. Psycho begins to pounce on his weakened pray only to be refrained by Riggs. This sends the psychotic one into a fit.
Psycho: WHY!?! Why are you protecting this filth?
His thick finger boldly points at the recovering Wheeler.
Psycho: It’s guys like him who are destroying OUR company! We’re the PROTECTORS of everything the IWC stands for, principles that can’t be tarnished by people like Wheeler. He isn’t devoted to this war, he’s devoted to HIMSELF!
These words further fluster Riggs who obviously doesn’t believe what Psycho is shoveling. Instead he turns his back on him, ready to suffer the repercussions for his antics. Surprisingly he isn’t drilled to the back with a clobbering blow, not meeting the same fate as his partner. Psycho lowers his head, mumbling to himself in dejection as Riggs grabs Jason’s arm, pulling him to his feet.
Mark: It looks like Riggs isn’t buying into Psycho’s gospel. After all, while Psycho’s been away for months, Riggs and Wheeler have been fighting the Conspiracy side by side
Jason is assisted all the way to his feet as Riggs scowls over his shoulder at the sulking Psycho. It’s apparent that Jason has no idea what just hit him, rather it was Psycho or a freight train. He finally begins to realize what happened when he’s scooped in the air and driven to the canvas with the Hopskotch. The fans are stunned by Riggs’ maneuver being delivered on the man he’s been teaming with for months.
Mark: HEY!
Screams resonate throughout the Manhattan Center as it sinks in on the crowd that Riggs has just betrayed Jason Wheeler. The winner looks like anything but as he lays on the canvas holding the back of his neck, Riggs standing up and slowly backing away from him. His gothic, disturbed eyes do not deviate from the agonizing body of his former accomplice.
Comeau: What has Riggs just done, what has he done to Wheeler?
Moore: Will they still exchange Easter eggs?
Riggs stops at Psycho’s side, the sullen eyes of the sadistic beast looking up into the painted features of the painted warrior. Their eyes interlock and their heads nod before they slip through the ropes to the apron, vacating the ring. Without speaking so much as a word to each other they start up the ramp, leaving a furious Jason Wheeler behind. The sweating, hurting Wheeler rolls to his gut, glaring through the ropes at the departing Psycho and Riggs. Neither man turns around to get even a brief glimpse of the trembling Black Cat, instead they progress through the curtains.
Mark: I don’t know why they did it, but I don’t know if Riggs or Psycho realize what they just got themselves into.
Susie: Hopefully it’s not a Honey Jar, we’ve see how much that effects Winnie the Pooh.
Jason’s eyes narrow on the dangling curtains, plotting his revenge.
Comeau: A truly shocking turn of events here at ringside but we’ve got to move onto what should be an EPIC match up as two IWC legends collide. Up next we’re about to witness Desolation going one on one against Desolation.
Moore: FIRST TIME EVER!
Mark: I’m glad you learned to read your cue cards. Let’s look back at how this all came about.
A PRE-CELEBRATION
Dan Douglas: My boy, my boy, my boy, it’s never too early to celebrate a SURE thing.
Boos can even be heard in the VIP dressing room of Christian Savior and Dan Douglas. The N.H.B Champion and the man who considers himself World Heavyweight Champion lifts a glass into the air, ready to receive some champagne. Douglas struggles with uncorking the bottle as he sits on the edge of his desk.
Christian: A little bubbly never hurts. It’s not like I can’t beat Orlando even while completely smashed.
Dan: Yes indeed. What a glorious evening we have ahead of us, as you FINALLY get the Cruze monkey off of your back, and put to rest any doubts about who is the real World Champion.
The grin on Savior’s face widens while he impatiently holds up the glass waiting for his champagne. For some reason Douglas just can’t get the bottle uncorked.
Savior: Well you know you have said that before. In fact you’ve claimed to have everything planned out perfectly only for us to watch it go horribly awry….
Being reminded of his shortcomings doesn’t sit well with the IWC President and exacerbates his problem with the bottle.
Christian: Like at Awaken, when you swore that Pat and Silencer would leave with the Tag Team titles. Or how about when you guaranteed that the World Championship would stay with me the night I pinned Orlando? Did it? Nope!
Dan: Subtly isn’t your strong point is it? I know I’ve GUARANTEED victory in the past only to have egg on my face by the end of the night, but there is no doubting it this time. You will leave the World Champion, mark my words.
A smile expands across Christian’s face as his wrist starts to get tired from holding the glass.
Savior: Speaking of MY title belt, hasn’t Evans had enough fun with it already?
Douglas briefly checks his watch then returns to his champagne bottle conundrum.
Dan: He should be back here at any min….
An urgent knock comes at the door, causing Savior and Douglas to turn their attention to it eagerly.
Christian: Why is he knocking?
Dan: Come in Evans!
The door now flies open as two of Dan’s private security guards adorned in riot gear assist a bloody, beaten Evans into the room. The Submission Champion’s arms are stretched over the shoulders of the guards as he almost carried into the room, his feet sliding across the floor. A piece of paper is taped to his chest as a stunned Savior and Douglas get to their feet.
Douglas: What’s the meaning of this!?!
Guard: We found him like out in the hall sir, he was all messed up.
Dan bites his lower lip as Savior snatches the note off of Evans’ sternum, reading it aloud.
Savior: Dear Christian, finders keepers. Sincerely, Orlando Cruze.
Every muscle in Savior’s body pulsates as his skin squirms, balling up the note in his hand.
Christian: That son of a bitch has got MY title belt!
All of a sudden the cork pops on the champagne bottle and the foam begins to flow.
MANHATTAN CENTER OF FEAR
Offbeat, horribly cheesy disco style tunes are heard in the background as a white limo pulls up next to a waiting helicopter. The propellers are already starting to spin before the driver’s door opens and Johnny Kingdom steps out, completely negating the point of having a limo in the first place.
Johnny Kingdom accepted an invitation for a match…
Kingdom approaches the helicopter before stopping at the door, looking upwards towards the sky in confusion.
At the Manhattan Center…in New York City…
Before he enters the flying apparatus Johnny unleashes an exasperated sigh.
Kingdom: Why in the hell are my actions being narrated? This isn’t a fucking Bob promo. And honestly, I have just a bit of trouble flying in a helicopter that has propellers held together by spearmint.
Begrudgingly Kingdom enters the helicopter, closing the door behind him.
It takes off with an irritated, pouting Kingdom seated in the back, his arms crossed and his eyes rolling.
Johnny: Come on, come on, let’s get there already. I’m not being paid extra to take part in this horrible parody.
The video shows the city streets beneath the helicopter, where cars are buzzing by and people are busying themselves with mundane choirs. A very disturbing voice can be heard in the background.
Kiiiiinggddooom……Kingdoooom….
It’s quite apparent that the deep vocals belong to Desolation. A brief clip is shown in black and white featuring Desolation assaulting Johnny with a 2x4 wrapped in barbwire, busting him wide open. Now things transfer to Desolation standing with a pitch black backdrop behind him and snow flakes blowing all around his tense body.
Desolation: We have a date with destiny….
As he speaks the fake snow flakes blow into his mouth, causing Desolation to cough and gag them up. Johnny is once again shown staring out the window of the helicopter.
Kingdom: I hope this doesn’t turn out totally gay.
A quick scene features Johnny pushing a ladder over and sending Desolation toppling from the top, crashing into the top rope throat first.
Desolation: I answered your challenge Kingdom…
Another scene provides images of Hellkat shockingly returning and superkicking Kingdom directly under the jaw.
Desolation: Now it’s just YOU and ME.
The snow flakes continue to blow all over Desolation as he stands in a darkened room. After making his statement he begins to shiver then looks off camera.
Desolation; Is it really necessary to have the air conditioning up so high? My nipples are harder than diamonds in a snowstorm. Seriously, they can cut gold right now.
Again the video switches to Johnny Kingdom stoically glaring forward, as if he’s in deep thought. His thoughts can now be heard.
Kingdom: I wonder if I’ll have to deal with the Loons….
In confusion Johnny looks around at his surroundings yet again.
Johnny: Why can I hear my thoughts externally? Weird.
More events that have transpired between Desolation and Kingdom are shown, including the Dark Man and Johnny standing mono a mono in the ring, their eyes intensely locked on each other. It then switches to more footage featuring Kingdom dressed as the Goobledy Gooker attacking the Dark Man with a chair. The video cuts back to Desolation being bombarded by snowflakes, spitting some of them out of his mouth in the process.
Desolation: I know that you like to live on the edge….come to the Manhattan Center ….. and play Desolation’s GAME….Okay, time out. Who wrote this shitty dialogue, and why am I going horse screaming all this cliché garbage?
Johnny stares out the window downward at the Manhattan Center, which now comes into view.
The scene awkwardly shifts to a backstage dressing room where a big table is centered. Gathered across its surface is a collection of armor and a huge thing of menacing horns. The Loons are converged around the table, dressed homo-erotically. All of their attention suddenly shifts to an entering Kingdom, a bright white light shinning in from behind him.
Pissin in the Wind: He’s here.
The camera briefly cuts to Hellkat sensually taking the bite of an apple then opening her mouth to allow the contents to spill out to the floor. Johnny’s stoic eyes overlook the gathered Loons before him, many of them whispering to each other gleefully. The feed is briefly interrupted with a scene of Johnny Kingdom being hit with the Curb Stomp from Desolation.
Conveniently Placed Midget: He’s HERE, he’s HERE. It’s Johnny, it’s Johnny.
The one eyed midget jumps up and down in excitement, thrusting out HAND, that has been surgically grafted onto his wrist. The Loons stand up and begin to swoon around Kingdom, grabbing his jacket and pants, feeling the fiber. All the while Naked Ned, Ron Raeth, and others make erotic sounds that deeply, DEEPLY disturb Kingdom.
Kingdom: STOP TOUCHING ME! I knew I should have brought my rape whistle.
The Loons finally part as the excited midget points at him, hopping in place and looking as if he’s devoured far too much sugar.
Conveniently Placed Midget: Kingdom’s here, play the game, play the GAME.
Kingdom looks down his nose at the midget.
Johnny: I really hope it’s not twister.
The camera cuts to Desolation standing in front of a glass mirror, trying to look all jacked up. In the glass vague images can be seen, corresponding to the events that have unfolded between Kingdom and Desolation, including the infamous screw job that cost Ladder the Cartel Championship.
Desolation: KIIIINGGGDDOOMMM!! Wow, I so just sounded like Captain Kirk in Star Trek 2.
Desolation continues to glare at the mirror before nodding to someone off camera. A little hammer enters the frame and busts the glass, as it was suppose to do during Desolation’s melodramatic scream.
Conveniently Placed Midget: It’s Desolation, it’s Desolation!
The Dark Man now stands in the same room as a confused Johnny Kingdom, wearing a huge fur coat.
Desolation: Johnny, I’m glad you came. Do you like the coat? I made it after Hellkat’s last molting phase.
Kingdom: It’s nice, I like it almost as much as this place. It’s just like you, big, dark and filled with idiocy.
Hellkat: HAHAHAHAHA. How cliché of you Kingdom, are you ready to play the game?
Johnny sighs and lowers his palm into his face.
Johnny: Fine, fine, fine, as long as you don’t say charades I’m willing to play anything.
Desolation: ENOUGH!
Desolation clears all of the armor off of the previously mentioned table, knocking it to the floor in a huge pile.
Desolation: Are you ready to do this Desolation style?
As a response Kingdom shrugs and a strap begins to be wrapped around the Dark Man’s wrist with the assistance of Hellkat. All the while HAND pokes out from beneath all the armor, which presumably buried the midget once it was shoved off the table.
Conveniently Placed Midget: Play the game, play the GAAAMMMEEE.
Kingdom: Alright already, let’s get this over with, we’ve killed enough buyrates as it is.
Desolation takes several deep breaths before a giant fire erupts from the center of the table, overtaking the scene. As it dissipates the video cuts forward in time by several minutes.
Kingdom: God damn your hitchhiker’s thumb, this isn’t fair!
Both Kingdom and Desolation are seated on opposite sides of the table with their hands tied together by the strap, involved in a wicked thumb war. Johnny tries desperately to get hold of Desolation’s thumb but he’s playing a defensive strategy, holding it back as long as possible.
Loons: DESO, DESO, DESO!!
The chant continues as both men continue their vicious thumbs war competition.
Kingdom: Really, how does this prove anything going into our match tonight?
Desolation has a blank look on his face before shrugging then catching Kingdom’s thumb in a precarious position.
TO BE CONTINUED….in five seconds
DESOLATION VS. JOHNNY KINGDOM
The show comes back to the ringside area where the fans are getting really anxious for the upcoming FIRST TIME EVER clash of legends. They are also very confused by how their suppose to react to that video package.
Mark: Well, um, uh, I guess the time has come Susie.
Moore: Did I finally get my period?
Comeau: No, we’re on the verge of witnessing history in the making as Desolation collides with Johnny Kingdom.
The arena lights dim and the opening chords of the Rolling Stones' "Paint it Black" echo throughout the arena. Red lights flash and mist appears on the Jumbotron. The harsh, synthetic guitars of "Fever Dream" kick in.
The Jumbotron show a pair of black jackboots marching in time with the beat. In the faded mist past atrocities committed by the Dark Man, Desolation can be seen.
A red serpent's eye pulses with a red glow in the background, the glaring, sinister smiling face of Desolation appearing in the center.
Red lights flash on and off in time with the tune, and a column of red flame explodes in the center of the entry ramp,, revealing the Dark Man in the entryway.
Desolation walks to the ring, head lowered. He climbs up into a kneeling position on the ring apron, arms entwined in the ropes, a sadistic smile on his face as he holds the pose for a few moments.
He gets to his feet and slowly raises one fist into the air before stepping through the ring ropes.
Comeau: This whole issue started due to the egotism of this man, Desolation, commencing with some vicious verbiage, but now we’re about to see it escalate into so much more.
Moore: Shadow puppets?
Mark: No….a fight. God damn were you born under electrical lines or something? We saw Desolation spill Kingdom’s blood a few weeks ago, will he do the same tonight or will he get a receipt for said actions?
There’s a sinister twinkle in the Dark Man’s eye, as if he’s got some kind of masterful plot in store for this contest.
WAKE UP
These words erupt over the PA system, resulting in a loud outcry from the crowd. They rise to their feet in anticipation of the Team Leader as the curtains part and through them emerges the former World Champion himself. Johnny steps onto the stage with a stoic stare, observing the fans who are standing solidly behind him. There is no change in his emotion as he starts towards the ring, Desolation casually leaning back first against one of the corners, watching the Team Leader on his way to the ring rather smugly. As Johnny stomps onto the mats the magnitude of his presence escalates and that big match feeling truly begins to set in. He now rolls under the ropes, hopping to his feet and keeping his eyes locked on the diabolical Dark Man all the while.
Moore: Michael Chiklis about to collide with Desolation…
Comeau: That’s actually Johnny Kingdom, but I understand how the bald heads may be confusing. Kingdom the longest reigning World Heavyweight Champion in ULW history, but some might argue that it doesn’t make him the greatest champion of all times. In fact, many claim that Desolation was the greatest champ ever.
Susie: What about Hurse?
Mark: I’m surprised you could say that with a straight face. Anyway, all doubts, all questions concerning who the better man is concludes tonight.
The crowd is at a fevered pitch as Desolation and Johnny Kingdom stroll forward out of their respective corners and find themselves nose to nose. Their eyes are brazen with devious, destructive thoughts as they finally find themselves on the cusp of one of the biggest matches in IWC history. Referee Stuart Wright now calls for the bell, sending the crowd into a deafening roar.
Both men slowly begin to follow one another, getting themselves mentally enthused for the challenge ahead.
Comeau: And we are underway with Desolation versus Kingdom.
Moore: FIRST TIME EVER!
Mark: Yeah, exactly.
Kingdom and Desolation lunge forward into a textbook collar elbow tie that ends quickly when the Dark Man slides around behind Johnny’s back. He now has him in a reverse waist lock before Kingdom performs a standing switch, getting behind the Dark Man and clamping his arms around his mid-section. Desolation drops down to his seat with Kingdom falling to his knees behind him, trying to maintain his waist lock.
A quick Desolation slides free from the rear waist lock and slips around behind the kneeling Kingdom’s back. He has now countered right back into another rear waist lock of his own but kingdom refuses to be bested. He starts to stand up only to reach back with his arm, wrapping it around Desolation’s neck and snapmaring him over to the canvas. As soon as Desolation hits the ring rump first Kingdom dives forward, grabbing his arm and trying to force him down to the canvas into a fujiwara of sorts.
To Johnny’s dismay however, Desolation is quick to rise back to his feet and twist his body, freeing his arm from the predicament and hooking one of Kingdom’s in the very same transition. He now falls away from him, pulling Kingdom down into an arm drag that sends him rolling across the canvas back to his feet.
Comeau: Counter wrestling thus far between these two men, we knew going into this match to expect a long feeling out process. Neither man wants to jump into anything and give their opponent the early advantage.
Moore: I literally knew none of that.
Mark: And I am literally not surprised in the slightest.
Desolation visualizes Kingdom ruining his Cartel title gauntlet match, motivating him to charge forward and place the rising Team Leader in a dragon sleeper. He has it locked in with almost primal strength, but Kingdom is equally as motivated as the Dark Man. He bridges his body up from the canvas and then yet again snapmares Desolation over his body to a seated position on the canvas.
The battle of one-upmanship continues as Johnny takes the Dark Man around the neck, locking in his very own dragon sleeper. Instead of countering the same way Kingdom does, Desolation drops straight to his back, his head slipping out of Johnny’s grasp as he now reaches up with his legs, placing them under his opponent’s armpits. He tries to pull the Team Leader down into a forward rollup into the pinfall but Kingdom ducks his head and dives. He rolls forward across the canvas as Desolation sits up, looking somewhat stunned by this counter.
Johnny rolls right to his feet then turns and barrels towards Desolation going for a knee strike to his face. However, the Alpha Gen member falls to his back, avoiding the knee and allowing Kingdom to step behind him. Johnny spins around when Desolation rolls onto the back of his shoulders, wedging his feet to Kingdom’s sternum and pushing him off.
Johnny backs into the cables, bouncing off of them and coming back in at a rising Desolation who is on the verge of throwing a punch before his opposition drops into a baseball slide between his legs. The flustered Dark Man spins around and walks into the heels of Kingdom’s raised boots, and one swift kick later sends him crashing to the canvas.
Desolation ends up laid out right beside Kingdom before both men gracefully nip to their feet then lunge into the air, simultaneously going for dropkicks. The heels of their boots connect and both men come tumbling to the canvas on their knees, immediately locking eyes.
Comeau: Back and forth we go with no man able to obtain the decisive advantage as of yet.
Moore: FIRST TIME EVER.
Mark: Indeed, this is, but saying that right now has zero relevance to what’s going on in this chess game of a match.
Susie: No chess, Hungry, Hungry Hippos is funner.
The intense eyes of both men remain interlocked as they slowly rise to their feet, yet again starting to circle each other. They are on the verge of locking up when Kingdom’s attention is swayed by something, his eyes shooting towards LADDER.
Moore: Look, it’s Ladder!
Comeau: What is it doing here?
Ladder is positioned right on the entry way and no one wants to question how it got there, but this has indeed confused Kingdom long enough to let his guard down. This is exactly what Desolation was planning on as he rushes towards his distracted opponent, throwing a lariat. Johnny regains his focus just in time to avoid the lariat, stepping around behind Desolation who turns and begins to lob a flurry of palm strikes.
Each strike swipes dangerously through the air as Kingdom barely rears his head in time to avoid the open palms. He ducks a few open hand shots and then wedges his shoulder to Desolation’s ribs, pushing him backwards then shoving him off into a nearby turnbuckle. Desolation hits the corner spine first when Kingdom comes charging forward only to have the Dark Man raise his boot.
Before it can connect Johnny catches the foot around the ankle and pulls back on it, forcing Desolation to hop on one foot. He now pushes the foot down, but as soon as it hits the canvas Desolation lifts his other leg into the air, swinging it towards Johnny’s face for a modified leg lariat.
Comeau: That’s going to decapitate Kingdom!
Johnny ducks into a forward roll under the leg of his opponent, hopping into the corner behind him. Just as Desolation turns around Kingdom jumps from the corner, going for some type of seated senton. However, the quick Dark Man ducks out of the way and causes Kingdom to change his move up, instead landing directly on his feet. He takes a few steps forward then spins around as Desolation comes barreling towards him, launching forward with both boots for a front dropkick.
At the last second Kingdom cartwheels out of the way of the boots, landing directly on his feet with incredible agility. The disgruntled Desolation stands up immediately and takes Kingdom by the wrist almost as soon as he lands on his feet, backing him into the ropes then launching him off across the ring via the Irish Whip.
Susie: Wow, they move like the ninjas from that Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon porno I watched.
Comeau: Neither man able to get an advantage thus far. It appears they have really scouted each other.
The Irish whip sends Kingdom charging into the cables before turning and hitting them spine first at a great speed. Somehow the Team Leader is able to reach back, hooking his arms around the top rope then giving his devious opponent an up yours taunt. Desolation laughs him off at first then tries to catch him off guard yet again by charging in only to have Kingdom sidestep him, catching the back of his rival’s head and throwing him through the ropes.
Desolation twists around and tumbles hard across the outside mats back first. There is just enough time for him to reach for his back and begin to stand when Kingdom launches himself over the top rope for a crossbody. Desolation steps out of the way and forces the former Champion to rethink his move, holding onto the top cable and now landing feet first on the apron. As soon as he lands Desolation delivers a buzzsaw style kick right to the front of Kingdom’s shins. This impact knocks Johnny’s legs out from under him and causes him to slam face first with devastating velocity right across the apron.
Susie: MR. MAGOO!
Comeau: Oh no, Kingdom’s neck may be broken, his skull may be fractured after it snapped off of that apron. This match just went from a counter-fest into disturbing with one fatal move.
Johnny lays on the outside mats, twitching but otherwise showing no signs of movement after that deadly move by his unconcerned opponent. The malicious Desolation stands Kingdom up and immediately takes him by the wrist, whipping his dazed body into the barricade. Johnny turns and slams against the steel plates at break neck speed, his entire body crumbling over the steel.
He reaches for his kidneys while staggering forward into Desolation who scoops him up into the air then drives him down hard into the mats. The fans cringe at the sight of the basic scoop slam into the thin protective matting, resulting in even greater damage to Johnny’s already possibly debilitated frame.
Mark: And of course we see no remorse from Desolation.
Moore: FIRST TIME EVE….
Comeau: YES. We know, we know.
The methodical Desolation keeps on Kingdom, lifting him back to his feet then wedging his hands to his ribs, throwing him up into the air and letting him come down face first into the apron. He bounces off of it and falls yet again in a lifeless heap to the outside mats.
After delivering another brain scrambling move Desolation rolls into the ring then rolls right back out, breaking the official’s ten count. Kingdom desperately tries to get up but is blasted directly over the upper back with a forearm strike, Desolation yet again taking him by the wrist and once more whipping him into the steel barricade. Somehow Kingdom jumps over the barrier this time though, landing on his feet amongst the screaming fans.
In his dazed state he charges forward and jumps up onto a small security wall behind the front row fans who are looking up at him in shock. Desolation doesn’t realize this has happened yet as he spins around just in time to watch Kingdom leap over the fans, over the barricade right into a forearm smash that connects to his face. The impact knocks Desolation backwards into the ring, hitting the apron spine first.
Comeau: Are you kidding me!?!
Moore: Wow, Johnny just got more hang time than Mr. Cooper.
Mark: I have never seen that in the IWC before. How did Kingdom have the wherewithal to pull that off?
Susie: Someone had a hearty breakfast this morning.
Johnny rolls across the mats holding his head and revealing that a slight gash has been opened up on his temple, which took much of the damage when he crashed skull first into the apron. He doesn’t let this effect him or the chants of his name from the astonished crowd, his lust for vindication is all that drives him as he approaches the weary Desolation. A hard forearm connects to the Dark Man’s jaw, further discombobulating him.
Johnny now uncoils a sickeningly stiff knife edge chop across Desolation’s sternum, inflicting even greater damage. The strike sends Desolation stumbling backwards, all shook up after that high flying forearm strike. He tries to maintain his footing but finds it difficult when Kingdom spins around, delivering an absolutely devastating roaring forearm. It connects directly to Desolation’s jaw, causing him to stagger backwards and fall against the barrier.
Kingdom moves towards him and delivers another chop, followed by another, and another, and another. After delivering what has to be the sixth straight chop on his still barely upright opponent Johnny turns and launches a fist into the air. This is met by a deafening roar of approval from the crowd, Desolation slouched forward reaching for his blood red chest that possibly houses many broken vessels and welts from those disturbing chops.
It now becomes apparent that Kingdom is nowhere near through with his opponent, turning and charging at him when Desolation steps out of the way. To keep from allowing his momentum to send him crashing into the steel Johnny lunges into the air, landing feet first on top of the barricade with the grace of a cat. Before he can properly get his footing however, Desolation lunges into the air and dropkicks him to the backside, sending Kingdom flipping forward and crashing into the front row.
Comeau: Ohhh, another sickening landing for Kingdom!
The crowd cleared out of their seats just in time to avoid Johnny, leaving their chairs empty for him to come tumbling down onto them. Some of the chairs break and others bend under Kingdom’s body as he came flipping down back first into them.
Moore: Those chairs innocent bystanders in the war between Desolation and Johnny Kingdom.
Mark: These two legends not only showing that they want to win this match, but that they want to outright cripple their opponent.
Kingdom falls out of the chairs that remained standing, colliding with the hard concrete while Desolation rolls out of the ring, having once again broken the official’s ten count. He approaches the barrier, reaching over it and grabbing a pain ridden, stunned Kingdom by the hair. He forces Johnny over the barricade and then scoops him up across his sternum before rolling him into the ring. Kingdom ends up spread across his back as Desolation slides in and then comes charging forward, lunging into the air with a knee strike that connects right to Johnny’s ribcage.
Kingdom sits up holding his mid-section before Desolation charges in and delivers a straight thrust kick right to the back of Johnny’s already damaged head. His eyes flicker as they try to stay open but Desolation can care less if he’s conscious or not, thrusting him down by the shoulder into the canvas then going for the cover.
1
2
To the disbelief of not only Desolation but the fans, Kingdom defiantly launches his shoulder from the ring. Ladder appears so stunned that it can’t move or express it’s shock over this kick out.
Comeau: Somehow Kingdom kicking out even after all his body has endured in this clash of the titans.
Moore: FIRST TIM….
Mark: DAMMIT, we know ALREADY!
The maniacal Desolation drags Kingdom over onto his knees and now delivers a straight headbunt. The shot knocks Johnny back down to the canvas, sending him rolling across the ring. He gets to his elbows and knees when Desolation takes him by both ears, leading him up to a kneeling base then delivering another straight headbunt. A tiny gash has been opened in the Dark Man’s forehead, but he doesn’t care as Kingdom rolls across the canvas to his seat. He barely has time to sit up when Desolation comes charging in delivering an appalling buzzsaw kick right to his chest. The impact echoes throughout the arena as Johnny tumbles onto his back, Desolation turning and falling into an arrogant cover.
He presses down on Johnny’s sternum with both palms as the official makes the count.
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2
Again Kingdom is able to launch his shoulder from the ring. He turns over onto his side as Desolation scoots up behind him, lifting his elbow into the air and bringing it down over and over again into the side of Kingdom’s skull. The despairing Kingdom tries to sit up as Desolation now drives knee after knee into his lower back, doing everything in his power to keep Johnny down with those dangerous strikes. As soon as Kingdom sits up, Desolation pulls back on his arm and on his chin, applying a modified rear chin lock.
Comeau: Submission now locked in by Desolation, we know how proficient both of these men are at grappling and we’ve already seen what they can do simply striking the hell out of each other.
Susie: He’s gonna pop his head off. Do you think there’s candy inside? Do you think Kingdom’s a piñata?
Johnny sticks his free arm out to his side, swiping it through the air, trying to empower himself to stand up. It certainly doesn’t hurt that the crowd is getting behind him, rallying in support and trying to add that little extra motivation for Kingdom to stand up. He gets to his knees, digging down deep to escape this hold when Desolation breaks the submission and launches himself forward into a vicious front dropkick to the side of Kingdom’s skull. Both boots nail him with precision to the temple, knocking Johnny back down to the canvas and sending him rolling across the ring under the ropes.
Comeau: Every time Kingdom starts to get up Desolation cuts him off with another of those sick strikes.
Moore: So Desolation is boycotting? I don’t see any picket signs or hear any inspirational chanting.
Mark: Not a strike in the literal….do you even know what literal means?
Susie: It’s a type of cigarette?
Johnny looks absolutely lifeless as he lies on the apron, Desolation moving towards him at a brisk pace. He reaches through the ropes, taking Johnny around the neck and then slowly pulling him to his feet onto the apron. As soon as Kingdom stands up Desolation delivers a hard open palm strike to the side of his head. The shot almost sends Johnny tumbling off of the apron backwards yet Desolation sticks his fingers into his nostrils, pulling him back towards the ring.
He keeps his fingers dug into Johnny’s nostrils just long enough to go for another open hand palm strike, but somehow Kingdom ducks forward and avoids it. He now launches himself through the ropes and catches Desolation around the thigh, dragging him down into a school boy pin at first. Desolation is released from this pinning predicament and allowed to drop to his chest and stomach as Kingdom falls to his side and takes his arm, trying to lock in the crossface to a huge ovation.
Comeau: Johnny going for the crossface!
Susie: OLIVE OIL!
Johnny just doesn’t have enough energy to get the hold applied, Desolation is able to roll away from him in time to escape the impending submission. Kingdom rises to his feet defiantly and rushes forward right into a jumping leg lariat from Desolation that takes both men down to the canvas. As soon as Kingdom hits the ring Desolation crawls towards him, sitting him up on the canvas and locking in a seated abdominal stretch.
Fans: KINGDOM, KINGDOM, KINGDOM!
The arena shakes due to the applause from the crowd, almost every fan, with the exception of Ladder, joining in support for him.
Comeau: Another submission locked in by Desolation, a textbook hold effectively wearing down Kingdom.
The barricades are slapped and feet are stomped as Kingdom begins to agonizingly rise towards his feet. His fist clinches tightly as he tries to find the power to get up. Desolation is a bit bewildered by Kingdom’s perseverance, especially as Johnny officially reaches a standing base. That’s when the Dark Man spins him around, hooking both arms then dropping back into a bridging double underhook suplex.
1
Kingdom gets his shoulder from the ring, rolling to his side with flickering eyes that try hard to stay ajar. Desolation sits up appearing miffed that this match is continuing to eat away at his precious time. He now stands up and takes hold of a bundle of Kingdom’s hair, leading him to his feet and delivering a hard back kick right to his ribs.
This shot doubles Johnny over, causing him to almost fall if it weren’t for the hands of the Dark Man holding him up. He’s now taken by the wrist and whipped into the far turnbuckle, Johnny spinning around and hitting it with great force. His arms fall over the ropes and his eyes fight to stay open as Desolation backs into the diagonal corner.
This is where Desolation stomps his foot several times then gives Kingdom an “Up Yours” taunt, returning the gesture that was directed at him earlier. He now rushes forward for a deadly Yakuza kick in the corner when Kingdom steps out of the way. As a result Desolation racks himself over the corner, reaching for his strained genitalia in the process.
Comeau: Desolation going for a Yakuza kick but Johnny just barely gets himself out of the way.
Susie: FIRST TIME EVER….
Desolation continues to reach for the layers upon layers of cups protecting his privates when Kingdom rushes up behind him, delivering a running dropkick right between his shoulder blades. This further hyperextends Desolation’s private area, causing him to stagger backwards right into the waiting arms of a rejuvenated Kingdom. Johnny hooks both of Desolation’s arms and snaps back into a bridging dragon suplex. The crowd is screaming as the official drops and makes the count.
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Johnny doesn’t have enough strength to hold on thus Desolation kicks out to screams from the fans.
Mark: Kingdom utilizing a dragon suplex but his body was in no condition to hold on for the pin.
The Team Leader slowly sits up gripping at his abdomen. He turns towards the Alpha Generation representative as Desolation pushes himself to a kneeling base, delivering an open hand palm strike directly to the side of his rival’s head. Desolation sways on his knees before connecting with his own open hand palm strike. The shot sends sweat flying from Kingdom’s head yet he provides a physical rebuttal through a slap to the Dark Man’s jaw. Red blotches are left on both men’s cheeks as Desolation lobs a hard forearm strike into Kingdom’s jaw.
Both men begin to rise to their feet as Johnny connects with a forearm of his own to the Dark Man’s face, then another and another and another. Each shot echoes throughout the arena and leaves Desolation incredibly dazed. Kingdom now lunges into the air, delivering a straight dropkick right to his rival’s sternum, knocking him backwards into the ropes. Desolation bounces off of them and comes rushing back in at Kingdom who again spins around into a roaring elbow that connects right to his jaw.
The stiff collision knocks Desolation from his feet as Johnny now falls forward into the cover in his exasperated state.
1
Desolation shockingly kicks out at one even after suffering Kingdom’s loaded roaring forearm smash. He rises to his knees and glances up at the official in an exasperated state.
Moore: Desolation not staying down, he still has more energy than Mecha-Godzilla.
Comeau: I guess that’s true, because he kicked out even after being hit with that roaring forearm. These two men are just tearing each other apart.
Desolation sluggishly begins to ascend towards his feet, just standing up when Kingdom slaps his forearm, spinning around into another roaring elbow. On this occassion Desolation ducks it, catching the inbound Johnny around the neck and thigh, setting up for the Exploder suplex.
Before he can connect Kingdom elbows him to the back of the skull, then does it once again. These shots break up the Dark Man’s attempt at the suplex and causes him to double over when Kingdom easily takes him around the neck. Johnny exerts what strength he has left to hoist Desolation into he air for the Brainbuster DDT. As soon as he’s lifted into the air Desolation lands a knee right to the top of Kingdom’s head, almost knocking him unconscious.
Kingdom is forced to drop Desolation back to his feet, where the Dark Man promptly pulls his opponent into his shoulders. He stands upright then jumps into the air, connecting with the Brand X. The back of Kingdom’s head is violently driven into the canvas, leaving him sprawled across the ring in an unconscious condition. Desolation stands up and approaches the turnbuckle, slipping through the ropes then climbing to the top rope. He stands up on the turnbuckle then with ease launches himself forward into a 450 splash that knocks all the air out of Kingdom’s body.
Comeau: Brand X followed by the 450! Desolation could be on the verge of victory!
Susie: FIRST TIME EVER!
The Dark Man hooks both of the Team Leader’s legs with the crowd standing in awe.
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NO! Johnny kicks out within seconds of the three count.
Mark: And shockingly this battle of legends continues.
Moore: You mean Kingdom kicked out? Oh pewey.
The fans are still on their feet screaming over Kingdom’s kick out as Desolation steps over his legs, interlocking them and then rolling Johnny to his ribs and stomach, applying his version of the cloverleaf.
Comeau: Now the Soul of Misery applied and there may be no escaping this hold at this point.
The roars of pain emanating from Kingdom are almost deafening as Desolation twists his legs and his back at an ungodly angle. The rabid intensity of the Dark Man fuels the hold that mangles Kingdom’s body so. The Team Leader desperately glares at the ropes, realizing just how far away they are before he starts to claw and scrape his way towards them. Sweat beads down his twisted red features as he crawls closer, inch by agonizing inch towards the ropes.
Moore: Look, those ropes may be useful again, like earlier instead of being lazy.
Mark: I can’t believe Kingdom is actually making his way towards those ropes after everything his body has been hit with. This is a true testament of just how far these two are willing to push their bodies to walk out of this match the better man.
Johnny’s entire body shakes with every inch he gets closer to the cables, Desolation gritting his teeth as he sits further down on the hold. Every muscle in Desolation’s body is exerted in order to maintain the Soul of Misery. Finally Kingdom drops short of the ropes, the side of his face pressed to the canvas as he slowly lifts his trembling fingers into the air, looking ready to tap out. Somehow he resists the submission, digging his fingers into his scalp and shaking his head, the fans again trying to rally behind him.
Mark: Just when it looks like Kingdom is about to tap he finds that extra bit of energy.
Moore: At this rate we’re going to be here until Christmas. And if that’s true I want a new Optimus Prime doll.
Comeau: I’ll see what I can do.
Kingdom’s face is twisted by the pain that ravages every fiber of his being yet somehow he continues to palm his way towards the ropes. Desolation tries to find more strength to put into the hold but it isn’t enough as Johnny’s trembling hand falls into the bottom cable to a building shaking applause. The hold is relinquished at the behest of the referee as Desolation immediately grabs Johnny around the jaw, starting to pull him back towards the center of the ring.
Kingdom launches himself forehead first into Desolation’s ribs, doubling him over. He now begins to deliver a series of rapid fire punches to his rival’s mid-section. Both of Kingdom’s fists unload on the Dark Man, leaving him stooped forward in shock. Now Kingdom begins to force himself upwards when Desolation spins around and almost beheads him via a brutal buzzsaw kick.
Mark: My God what a kick that landed right to Kingdom’s head. Johnny is going to need many catscans after this match is over.
Moore: I have those once a week.
Johnny is laid out completely with that gash on his temple bleeding a little more heavily. Desolation bends forward, lifting the legs of Kingdom and placing them over his shoulders. He leans forward into the back of Kingdom’s legs for the pinfall.
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2
Johnny again kicks out much to Desolation’s annoyance. He now looks towards Ladder on the entry way, pointing down at Kingdom as if passing on some tutelage. Johnny rolls away from the Dark Man, getting to his elbows and knees with blood dribbling from his temple and Desolation lining up for a punt like kick. He bends forward with hands pressed to his knees, glaring at the crawling Kingdom before rushing forward and delivering a buzzsaw kick aimed at the back of Kingdom’s head.
Johnny ducks it and then pushes Desolation forward into the ropes. He bounces from the cables chest first and staggers backwards into Johnny who catches both of his arms, setting up for another dragon suplex. However, Desolation charges forward yet again at the ropes, bending down and dragging Kingdom along behind him.
He thrusts his upper body through the ropes and drags Johnny throat first into the upper most cable. The impact strangles Johnny and causes him to stumble backwards towards the center of the ring.
Comeau: Kingdom looking for the dragon suplex yet again but Desolation denied it.
Moore: Just like I’m denied access to movie theaters. Apparently they have a thing against people humping the big screen whenever Paul Walker’s face appears.
Mark: Who would have figured.
Desolation turns around and rushes right at Kingdom, again jumping into the air with another leg lariat. Johnny ducks it and steps behind the Dark Man, wrapping his arms around his waist and dropping back into a release German suplex. Desolation crashes hard into the canvas across the back of his head and shoulders, rolling over to his knees when Kingdom steps in over his head, hooking his legs and arms then lifting him into the package piledriver. Desolation is spiked right on top of his head, causing him to convulse once he falls to the canvas.
Mark: Johnny just busted out the package piledriver. We haven’t seen him use that move in ages.
Kingdom is unable to capitalize, lying on the canvas in an exhausted heap. Both men are exhausted especially after that drop directly on Desolation’s head. Referee Wright steps in, commencing with a ten count to disqualify both men should they be unable to get up. The crowd stands, not wanting to see this contest conclude in such a manner, they’re imploring either Kingdom or Desolation to stand. Somehow both men are discovering the will power within to start their upward ascension.
Comeau: Get up, get up…
Moore: And get down with your funky selves.
Mark: Thanks for once again crushing whatever faith I still had in your commentating abilities.
Susie: Your welcome.
The crowd is still imploring both men to stand as Johnny finally sits up. On the other hand Desolation is rolling towards the ropes, grabbing hold of them and sluggishly dragging himself to his feet. His skull must be enflamed with pain after that package piledriver yet he still has the strength to charge at a rising Kingdom. Unfortunately he rushes right into the boot of Kingdom, doubling him over as Johnny places him in a front chancery, setting up for the Exodus Finale (Brainbuster DDT).
Comeau: Exodus Finale!
Right as he begins lifting up Desolation, Johnny is pushed backwards across the ring. The Dark Man has freed himself from the front chancery, now watching Kingdom back towards one of the corners. He stops himself just a few inches shy of the turnbuckle when Desolation comes barreling forward only to have Kingdom side step him, catching hold of his arm.
The packed Manhattan Center is squealing as Desolation is on the verge of being forced into the Lesson in Leadership. Somehow the Dark Man is fighting it though before he drops down into a forward roll. He lunges out of the roll and lands feet first on the second rope of the turnbuckle, jumping off of it and twisting around into a flying lariat. Somehow Kingdom catches hold of Desolation’s inbound arm and forces him down to the canvas, interlocking his hands around his jaw and applying the Lesson in Leadership (crossface).
Mark: The Lesson in Leadership locked in!
Moore: FIRST TIME EVER!
Comeau: Can I please just quit right now?
Desolation’s arm is almost separated from his shoulder as he ties his best to counter out of the crossface. He forces himself up to his knees then rolls towards Kingdom to escape the hold. Sadly for the Dark Man his opponent rolls with him and maintains the crossface. Desolation ends up right back on his stomach, finding himself trapped in the same hard to break submission.
Mark: Desolation trying to escape but he just cannot get out of the crossface. Will we see the Dark Man FINALLY submit?
Referee Wright inquires as to rather the Dark Man wishes to tap out or not only for Desolation to audible shout “no.” He now reaches begins to slide across his stomach in reverse, Johnny still ripping and tearing at his shoulder, the same one Desolation has had injured in the past. Despite all of this Desolation extends his foot in reverse, placing it over the bottom rope.
The referee immediately demands that Kingdom break the hold as he surprisingly complies. He breaks the submission then twists around and places Desolation in an immediate front chancery, getting to his feet and forcing the Dark Man up as well. He now lifts him into the air for the Exodus Finale when Desolation floats over, landing behind Johnny’s back.
Before Kingdom has a chance to respond Desolation drops into a sideways roll, knocking Kingdom’s legs out from under him and causing his rival to crash onto his back. Desolation promptly rises to his feet, sticks his leg through Kingdom’s and rolls him over onto his stomach. He reaches down for the wrists to connect with that deadly CURB STOMP when Johnny twists his body, connecting with almost a drop toe hold variation.
Desolation tumbles forward across his chest and stomach when Kingdom dives forward and grabs the arm. Once again a desperate Kingdom is trying to lock in the crossface to a thunderous reaction. That’s when Desolation gets to his knees and pushes himself back first into Kingdom’s chest. Both men roll back with Kingdom landing on his spine and Desolation laying on top of his chest. Before the official can make a count Desolation rolls over top of Kingdom to his feet then grabs his legs, wrapping them around his own and lifting Johnny into the Curb Stomp.
Moore: ADMIRAL GRIMITZ!
Comeau: The Curb Stomp finally hit by Desolation and possibly finishing Kingdom off once and for all.
Desolation slowly slithers into the pinfall, his body exasperated as he pushes Kingdom onto his back. Both of Johnny’s legs are hooked with the fans rising to their feet.
1
2
3
The Dark Man is victorious, the crowd booing before their reaction is altered by the sight of Kingdom launching his shoulder into the air. Referee Wright informs Desolation that he only got a two count, leaving the Dark Man noticeably stunned.
Mark: I don’t believe it, Kingdom kicked out.
Moore: I do believe it, because now things are more dramatic.
The whole building is rumbling with applause while Desolation takes Johnny by the ears, forcing his almost lifeless body to it’s feet. He starts to back towards the corner, stepping up it and forcing Johnny up with him. He steps over the top rope and begins to stand up on it as he forces Johnny’s head under his seat, perhaps setting up for the Wyvern Driver II (Sheer Drop Styles Clash).
Desolation begins to lift him only to have Kingdom twist his body and come back down to his feet. He takes hold of Desolation’s wrist and pulls him out of the corner into a fireman’s carry. Johnny gets his third wind as he drags Desolation to the center of the ring, setting up for the Death Valley Driver. Just before he can connect the Dark Man twists his body, slipping down Kingdom’s back and pulling him over into the sunset flip.
However the Dark Man stands up and immediately tries to slip to slip his leg through Kingdom’s, going for the Curb Stomp a second time.
Comeau: Here comes another Curb Stomp.
Moore: Two of them? That’s overkill.
Mark: Just like your constant displays of stupidity.
Johnny suddenly sits up and grabs the Dark Man’s shirt, pulling him down into a small package. The crowd is screaming as the official falls to the ring making the count.
1
2
To the disbelief of the masses Desolation kicks out right before the three. He falls to his side with both men rolling to their feet. The Dark Man is still doubled over when Kingdom steps over his head, reaching out to hooks his legs for the package piledriver. Desolation spins his head out from under Johnny’s seat and takes hold of his wrist, whipping him into the turnbuckle they just battled out of.
Kingdom rams into the turnbuckle spine first when Desolation blazes a path in his direction. There is only second for Kingdom to react, prompting him to bend forward and catch the Dark Man against his shoulder. With quickness he stands up, tossing his aggressive opponent over the ropes. To his shock Desolation catches the top rope, landing with great agility feet first on the apron.
He now launches his leg over the top rope, nailing a buzzsaw kick directly to the side of Kingdom’s head and rendering Johnny almost unconscious.
Comeau: WHAT A KICK!
Moore: He has better kicks than Ralph Macchio. I miss you Mr. Miyagi.
Mark: He taught us all the proper way to paint a fence.
Kingdom staggers sideways into the corner, falling against it for support as Desolation begins to scale the outside of the turnbuckle in front of him. He grabs hold of his head and drags the bald scalp under his seat, forcing Johnny to begin climbing the inside of the post. It’s obvious that Desolation is again setting for the Sheer Drop Styles Clash.
Mark: If Desolation hits this the match is over and done with.
Moore: He should get a million bonus charisma points if he connects.
Desolation lifts Kingdom up into the air and steps up onto the top rope. That’s when Kingdom forearms him to the knee and pulls his head back, freeing himself from this dangerous predicament. Before Desolation has time to react, distracted by the pain in his knee, he’s taken around the neck and hoisted into the air, being dropped head first into the top of the turnbuckle with the brainbuster DDT.
Comeau: OH MY GAWD!!
Moore: He landed right on his head!
Mark: Johnny just… my God… he just hit an Exodus Finale right on top of the turnbuckle.
A holy shit chant has started as Desolation falls from the top rope, where he was standing on top of his head and falls knees first to the apron. His eyes remain wide open, looking as if he just suffered some type of aneurism induced by the heinous Exodus Finale. A move that he has no time to recover from before Kingdom takes him around the neck, having slipped through the ropes to the apron. He hoists a stunned Desolation into the air then drops him with the Exodus Finale right on top of the hard apron.
Susie: SUGAR TITTIES!!
Comeau: ANOTHER Brainbuster DDT right on top of the apron. Desolation has to be brain dead at this point.
Kingdom rolls Desolation into the ring and drops into the cover, the crowd absolutely shocked by what they just witnessed.
1
2
Comeau: Can Desolation kick out of two Exodus Finales!?!
3!
Thunderous applause sweeps through the Manhattan Center as Johnny Kingdom has just pinned Desolation in the center of the ring.
Comeau: Kingdom has done it, he’s finally defeated Desolation!
Moore: I hate pancakes!
The crowd is still screaming both from the shock of seeing two of the most devastating Exodus Finales in IWC history but also from witnessing such an epic victory. However, Kingdom is in no condition to celebrate, he just lays across the canvas sweating profusely alongside a still unconscious Desolation.
A “Kingdom” chant commences from the crowd as Johnny finally sits up, his body aching from head to toe after this grueling one on one encounter. Despite such agony he rises to his feet without the official’s assistance, struggling to lift his arm up in victory. A standing ovation is given from the fans not just for Kingdom but for the efforts of both men who produced an in ring classic.
Comeau: It took everything he had in his body but Kingdom pulled off perhaps one of the biggest wins of his wrestling career.
Moore: I do like waffles though.
The crowd is still screaming as Johnny staggers forward into the ropes, falling against them for support. While leaning on the cables his eyes turn to glare down at the sprawled out Desolation. The Dark Man’s eyes are still closed solid as Hellkat now slides into the ring, alongside Axl Evermore. Both individuals gather around the still unconscious Desolation, Hellkat taking his head into her hands.
Moore: Look, it’s that devious kitty, I hope she rejuvenates Desolation with some cat nip.
Mark: Obviously both Hellkat and Axl Evermore are concerned about the Dark Man’s condition after suffering two consecutive Exodus Finales on the turnbuckle and then the apron.
Axl looks over his shoulder at Kingdom, shaking his head as soon as their eyes interlock. Hellkat looks up from her unconscious husband in anger.
Hellkat: How could you do this to Desolation in front of Ladder!?!
Johnny slips through the ropes to the apron, taking one last lingering look at the Dark Man as Hellkat and Axl try their best to revive him.
GOOD LUCK
The camera opens directly on the World Heavyweight title’s glistening surface. It remains there for a moment before pulling back to reveal the smirking face of one Orlando Cruze. He moves towards the ring adorned in his street gear for the impending World Heavyweight title match, perhaps the biggest in his career.
Although he’s focused on the match his grin is elicited from his reunion with the World title, and the fact that he’s taken out every Conspiracy memory save for one.
Hey Cruze…
Orlando abruptly stops when he finds himself face to face with Jason Wheeler. The Black Cat is rubbing at the back of his neck in pain as he glares into the Icon’s intense face, Orlando unsure of what is about to happen.
Wheeler: Do me a favor and pin that idiot brother of mine.
Jason respectfully extends his palm as the Icon stares down into it. He now slaps his hand into Jason’s shaking it.
Jason: And when your through with Savior, remember the one man you’ve been unable to beat.
Even though he was betrayed earlier tonight Wheeler is still able to smirk as he points egotistically at himself. Orlando smirks and nods.
Orlando: I’ll keep you in mind, but right now my brain is on one thing. Taking everything back that Christian has stolen from me.
It appears that Jason likes what he’s hearing as Orlando continues down the long hall that leads towards the ring. Again his path is impeded, this time by an arguing David Freak and Aurora Rose. They stop momentarily so that Freak can tell the passing Icon something.
David Freak: Hey Cruzey, watch your back against those cheating bastards.
Cruze: Oh don’t worry, the Conspiracy aren’t the only ones with tricks up their sleeves.
He smiles and continues onward down the corridor.
Orlando WAIT!
Before Cruze can reach the curtains he is paused by an all too familiar voice. He glances over his shoulder at an approaching Sallie. Her hands are interlocked behind her back and her head is lowered, obviously finding this situation to be awkward. Orlando has no idea what to think as she steps in front of him, placing her palm on the World title belt.
Sallie: I never thought I’d hear myself say this, but good luck out there.
The Icon is too stunned to produce a reply as Sallie now backs away, smiling warmly at the World Heavyweight Champion.
A BUILD TOWARDS THE END
The camera cuts back to the ringside area where Mark Comeau is shaking his head smugly while Susie Moore spends her time spinning in circles gleefully.
Comeau: Strong words of reassurance shockingly from Sallie.
Moore: Is there a such thing is weak words? Oh God, I think I’m gonna vomit.
Mark: That’s what happens when you spin in your chair for forty five straight minutes. I’m sure the path to our next pay-per-view will be equally as disorientating. Next time we see you on pay-per-view it will be for Extinction.
EXTINCTION
COMING LIVE TO PAY-PER-VIEW
ORLANDO CRUZE © VS. CHRISTIAN SAVIOR
The crowd is getting pumped for what should be one of the most brutal World title matches in recent history.
10...
9...
8...
7...
6...
The crowd starts booing as the countdown continues, as it signifies the arrival of a certain superstar. Their jeers quiet as the countdown reaches...
5…
4…
3…
2…
1…
A series of bright fireworks go off as people yell and boo the recognizable countdown.
You think you know me?!
I’m…
As the smoke clears, Christian Savior is seen with his back to the audience, his arms outstretched!
Falling in the black
Slipping through the cracks
Falling to the depths can I ever go back
Dreaming of the way it used to be
Can you hear me
Spinning around, the figure reveals himself to be Christian Savior, wearing his black pants and phoenix-logo shirt, along with a long black trenchcoat. An infuriated expression resides on his face as he moves down the ramp, Dan Douglas eagerly flanking him. The N.H.B Championship adorns Douglas’ shoulder on Christian’s behalf, but they both appear furious that another belt isn’t in their possession, the World title.
Falling in the black
Slipping through the cracks
Falling to the depths can I ever go back
Falling inside the black
Falling inside falling inside the black
Savior and Douglas make their way down the ring, ignoring what words are being shouted by the audience.
Tonight I'm so alone
Your touch used to be so kind
Don't leave me alone
This sorrow takes ahold
Don't leave me here so cold
(Never want to be so cold)
Your touch used to give me life
I've waited all this time, I've wasted so much time
Cause I barely see at all
Don't leave me alone, I'm
Savior climbs up onto the apron, removing his coat. Douglas climbs up onto the apron and continues to gesture towards Savior, insinuating that he’s the rightful Champion.
Comeau: I cannot believe this guy, he’s actually upset that Orlando took back what belongs to him? But despite his attitude I have to admit he found a pretty convenient path to this World Championship match. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone stoop to the levels that Savior did in order to achieve this matchup.
Susie: Did he steal Orlando’s socks?
Mark: No, but he did abduct his children in order to bait Cruze into this match.
Moore: Oh, because it be horrible if he stole his socks.
Savior is still confident despite the absence of the World title. The fans are finally given reason to cheer when “You Know My Name” strikes the PA system and results in a massive outpouring of applause. The entire crowd is standing and buzzing with excitement when the rightful World Champion Orlando Cruze storms through the curtains, the gold once again hanging from his palm. His centered, focused eyes are locked straight on Christian’s smirking face, and they do not turn away. He marches down the ramp with strobe lights flickering behind his broad shoulders.
Comeau: Orlando Cruze on his way to the ring and you can tell just by that look on his face how serious of a match this is for him. He’s here to take back his love for this business, and to take back his pride, both of which have been stolen by this maniacal bastard Savior.
Moore: But not his socks right?
Mark: Socks aren’t important! There’s so much riding on the line here tonight as these two finally square off one on one. After months of trying to steal that belt from Orlando we’ve finally come to the culmination of it all.
Orlando steps up onto the apron wearing his street pants, obviously not dressed for a match like Christian, instead he’s prepared for a war. He slips through the ropes into the ring, throwing the belt to the referee as Kailey Worf steps to the middle of the canvas on the verge of doing the ring introductions.
That’s when Christian bends down and rushes across the ring, lunging forward for the spear on Orlando before the introductions can be made or a bell can be rung. Right as he dives at Orlando the Icon removes a railroad spike from his pocket and drives the point directly between Savior’s eyes.
Comeau: RAILROAD SPIKE!
Screams are elicited from the fans as the spike tears through Savior’s flesh and sends him crashing spine first to the ring. He palms his face in a state of astonishment, pulling his hands back and spotting the blood smeared across them. Douglas’ jaw has dropped on the outside of the ring, astonished by what he just witnessed as a furious Orlando stands over the number one contender holding a bloodied spike.
Mark: Orlando Cruze has just started this World title match by spiking Christian Savior right in the head! I’ve never seen a main event start like this.
Susie: I’ve never seen a start to a main event ever, I’m mostly too busy playing patty cake with myself.
Referee Chester Princeton escorts Kailey out of the ring with great haste and now motions for the bell. Orlando throws the spike aside now that it’s illegal to use it and drops to a still stunned Christian’s side, beginning to deliver repeated right hands to his bloodied forehead. More crimson flows with each devastating right hand that connects to Savior’s face.
Christian tries to push him away so he can recover, within the first five seconds of the match he’s already gushing blood. There is no escaping the vengeful Icon however, who stands and begins to stomp Savior over and over again to the sternum. Christian rolls towards the ropes and ends up on his back as Orlando grabs the top cable, stomping down at him repeatedly. His boot is driven directly into Christian’s forehead, scraping his heel across it.
Mark: Such intensity from the Icon, he’s all fired up by the memories of what Savior has done to his family.
Susie: Did he beat them at Family Feud? I love Richard Karn.
Comeau: You’d be the only one.
Savior rolls under the ropes to the apron, getting to his knees as blood just continues to gush in pints down his face. Orlando now reaches through the ropes, grabbing his hair and pulling him through the cables. Christian’s ankles end up propped on top of the middle cable with Cruze placing him in a front chancery then spinning around into an elevated swinging neckbreaker.
The back of Christian’s head is driven with great force into the canvas, causing him to sit up, his eyes awkwardly blinking. Orlando pulls him down to the ring and places him in a modified side headlock, beginning to slug him again and again to his already bloodied forehead.
A concerned Princeton jumps in starting a five count, reaching four before Orlando stops utilizing the blatant closed fists. He now stands up and backs into the ropes, bouncing off then lunging forward into a huge knee strike right to the lacerated forehead of the N.H.B Champion. Christian rolls around on the ring as a result covering his busted forehead with both palms.
Comeau: Orlando is trying to do nothing short of tear Christian apart.
Moore: He should attach both ends to horses then, although that might make Christian taller instead of killing him.
A still stunned Savior rolls into a corner, sitting up when Orlando slugs him to the forehead. He stands over top of Savior, punching him over and over again to his open wound. The Icon now pulls back his blood smeared hand, running his crimson covered fingers down his face. Savior’s blood now adorns the Orlando’s face as if it were war paint while Douglas demands the referee stop the savage Icon.
Princeton has no other alternative but to jump in Orlando’s path, pushing him backwards only to be shoved aside by the World Champion. The double Champ storms towards Christian who suddenly sits up and grabs the inbound Cruze’s tights, dragging him down face first into the second turnbuckle pad.
Orlando bounces head first off of the corner before he stands up and staggers backwards into Christian. Savior spins him around and delivers a kick to his ribs then takes him around the neck. It appears that Christian is going for the implant DDT when Orlando stands up, back dropping Savior over the top rope and sending him crashing hard to the outside mats.
Mark: Savior going for the implant DDT but then he was sent crashing to the outside mats. Christian cannot get out of the gates after being spiked in the face.
Susie: I drank a cocktail that was spiked once, then I woke up handcuffed to a radiator.
Comeau: Yeah, sorry about that.
The still badly bleeding Christian stands up, swiping the claret from his eyes then turning towards the ring when Orlando dives through the ropes. To a huge reaction Orlando connects with a diving forearm right to Savior’s lacerated forehead, both men crashing to the mats.
Moore: Now Orlando is flying like a fairy! The one’s with wings, not the ones who can accessorize.
Mark: Orlando going high risk with a sensational dive. I haven’t seen him bust anything out like that in ages.
Douglas slaps the apron in rage, imploring Christian to get up. Cruze is intent on not letting that happen as he scoops Christian up across his chest then drops him down chest first right on top of the barricade. He now bends forward, burying his shoulder to Savior’s ribs, then charging him back first right into the steel steps. The stairs dent around Christian’s spine, causing him to double over them backwards, gasping for air.
An incredibly intense Orlando now climbs up onto the apron, rushing across it and diving off for a double axehandle smash. That’s when Savior rushes forward away from the stairs and catches Cruze in mid-air with a spear right to the ribs. Cruze is sent crashing to the mats hard, immediately wrapping his arms around his possibly shattered ribs.
Comeau: Savior just CAUGHT Orlando with the Blaze of Glory, binging him down out of mid-air!
Moore: SCROOGE MCDUCK!
Pain flows through every inch of Orlando’s abdomen but the bloodied Christian is having trouble getting back to his feet to capitalize on this advantage. Douglas is now smiling and bragging to the booing fans about Christian’s unbelievable talent.
All the while Savior has rolled into the ring then back out to break the official’s ten count. He staggers towards Cruze and takes him around the neck, again brushing the blood out of his eyes. He drags Orlando to his feet then twists him around and connects with a reverse neckbreaker on the outside mats.
Cruze sits up reaching for the back of his neck as Christian again rolls him to his feet in a sluggish, slow manner. Orlando is stood up and whipped into the steps, Orlando slamming into them viciously shoulder first. Christian whips his hair back, his locks drenched with his own blood as he methodically approaches Cruze who has crumbled to the mats. The Icon rolls around on them arching his back and holding his shoulder, suffering a great deal of damage after that spear.
Mark: Christian now on the advantage, he might be a technically versed competitor but….
Moore: He’s got better hair that Farah Fawcett?
Comeau: True, but I was going to say he’s also proficient and brawling as indicated by his lengthy No Holds Barred Title reign, a belt he’s held for going on six months now.
Finally Orlando is rolled back into the ring by Savior who slides in himself and crawls into the cover. He falls into the lateral press, taking deep exasperated breaths, the blood loss really getting to him.
1
2
Orlando launches his shoulder from the ring somehow, kicking out right before the three count can be made. The crowd cheers accordingly as Orlando now sits up only for Savior to clamp his arms tightly around his waist, establishing a bearhug from behind. Savior squeezes at the ribs, causing Orlando a tremendous amount of grief, his features twisting with anguish.
Mark: Now we’re seeing Savior utilize more of that technical approach we talked about a few moments ago.
Moore: Actually you talked about it and I just pretended to listen.
Orlando clinches his fists, fighting through the pain of that spear he endured on the outside mats. The crowd is rallying behind him, trying to get the struggling Icon to his feet. He hesitantly forces himself up to a knee then agonizingly begins to stand with Christian still gripping remorselessly at his ribs, trying his best to break them.
To a loud reception Orlando gets to his feet only for Christian to step to his side and take him down immediately into the Russian Leg Sweep. Cruze crashes with force against the canvas across his back, sending him rolling across the ring, trying to create some space between himself and the challenger.
He starts to stand up, still gripping at his ribs when Christian comes bolting in and taking him around the neck, connecting with a swinging neckbreaker. Orlando slams into the ring, sitting up and reaching for his neck yet again when Savior lunges into the air, dropkicking him to the back of the head.
These maneuvers are really taking their toll on Cruze’s body as he slowly begins to stand up only for Christian to step up behind him, locking in yet another reverse bearhug. He clamps onto the ribs of the Icon tightly, squeezing with all the strength of his arms.
Comeau: Reverse bearhug yet again applied, trying to exacerbate the damage done by that spear earlier.
Susie: He’s making Cruze’s booboo worse.
Mark: Thanks for simplifying everything I just said to its most retarded form.
Moore: That’s what I’m here for, and to you know, give the audience a pear of hooters to stare at.
Orlando tries to will himself up to his feet, the crowd yet again getting behind him. They slap the barricades and stomp their feet as Orlando moves inch by painful inch towards his feet. Savior exerts a little more strength into the hold, trying to further the suffrage Cruze is enduring and keep him grounded. It just isn’t enough though as Orlando reaches his feet only for Savior to break the hold and grab Cruze around the head. He drops to his seat, pulling Cruze down into a reverse face buster. The back of the Icon’s head is driven forcefully into the canvas as his legs shoot up into the air, Savior grabbing the back of his knees and pulling down on them for the pin.
1
2
Cruze again kicks out, causing Savior to roll over in reverse to his feet. He bends forward, his hands pressed to his knees motioning repeatedly for Cruze to stand up as he now sets for the spear.
Comeau: Oh no, Savior again setting up for the Blaze of Glory.
The agonizing Orlando sluggishly begins to stand as Christian wipes clotted blood out of his eyes, his fingers twiddling with anticipation. Finally the Icon reaches his feet when Savior comes charging in with the spear. At the last conceivable second Orlando steps out of the way, Christian rushing past him into the ropes. He bounces off of the cables and comes back in at Orlando who catches him against his shoulder. A shocked Savior is hoisted into the air and twisted into a spinebuster slam.
Comeau: SPINEBUSTER from Orlando. That’s exactly what he needs to get back into this intense battle.
Moore: My cat busted its spine once, it’s why it walks around in one of those cute little wheelchair thingies. Actually I broke my cat’s spine just so I could buy one of those things.
Cruze falls to his back, unable to make the cover on the claret covered Christian. Both men lay on the ring trying their best to recover while the angered Douglas slaps the apron, imploring Savior to get back up, begging him to stand. Savior hears Dan’s words and begins to stand up despite his excruciating condition, Orlando doing the same.
The second that the two reach their feet Christian throws a right hand at Orlando only to have it blocked by the Icon. Orlando throws a jab into Savior’s jaw, following it up with another shot. Christian throws a jab with his other hand that Orlando ducks then connects with a European Uppercut to his rival’s jaw.
The shot almost lifts Savior off of his feet and sends him stumbling backwards into the ropes. He bounces off of the cables then comes staggering forward into Orlando who catches him around the waist before dropping back into a release overhead belly to belly suplex. Savior crashes into the canvas across his spine, reaching for his kidneys then rolling to his feet. He begins to stand up reaching for his kidneys when Cruze rushes in delivering a high impact Euro uppercut. The shot lifts Savior from his feet, sending him flying backwards into one of the turnbuckles.
Mark: The Icon back in the driver’s seat.
Susie> Orlando has a driver’s license? I didn’t know people with bald heads were allowed to drive.
Orlando comes charging in when Savior lobs a boot directly into his face. The shot causes Cruze to stagger backwards as Christian pulls himself up the corner in reverse, standing on the second rope. He now launches himself forward, flying right at Orlando who ducks down out of the way. As a result Christian lands on his feet with his back turned towards Cruze, who immediately takes him around the waist then drops in reverse. Savior is German suplexed back first into the top turnbuckle pad.
Susie: GARFIELD!
Mark: A German suplex right into the turnbuckle!
Savior crashes off the top of the turnbuckle spine first then twists, crashing to the outside mats. The bloodied Challenger ends up sprawled out over the mats, laying there in an almost unconscious state. Douglas watches this in an inconsolable state from the opposite side of the ring.
The Icon continues to do things the fans aren’t accustom to seeing as he begins to climb up the turnbuckle, getting to the very top rope. He stands up on the turnbuckle as Savior rolls in the direction of the ring, sticking his hands under the tarp hanging from the apron.
The enraged Douglas climbs up onto the apron, shouting at the referee as Princeton moves right towards him, getting in his way. The two continue to argue with each other as Orlando flies from the top rope, coming down towards Savior who suddenly stands up with a chair in his hand, driving the top edge right into Cruze’s ribs. The crowd is shocked as the steel collides directly with Orlando’s mid-section, doubling him over.
Christian throws down the chair at this point and takes Orlando around the neck, dropping back with a DDT right onto the thin mats. This collision causes the Icon to roll to his back, laying there in a semi-conscious condition. Although in a very damaged state himself Christian takes Orlando around the neck and forces him up to his feet before rolling him into the ring. Savior slides into the ring and crawls into the cover, Douglas dropping from the apron to let the referee get back to his job.
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The Icon kicks out to a loud reaction from the crowd.
Mark: Orlando getting his shoulder up again in what has been one of the most physically intense World title matches in IWC history.
Susie: Here’s hoping this match becomes history soon, I need to regurgitate the kernel I ate earlier.
The stunned Orlando begins to roll away from Christian who begins to clobber him over the back with clubbing blows. These shots elicit shockwaves of pain throughout Orlando’s body before Savior rushes at his side, dropping into a knee strike to his skull. Cruze rolls onto his back as Christian steps in and drops down into a leg drop across his throat. Orlando grabs at his throat, rolling to his side and gasping for air while Christian takes him around the jaw.
The Icon is led to his feet as Savior delivers repeated knees to his ribs, backing Orlando into the ropes. He presses his spine to the cables when Savior whips him off across the ring into the opposite cables. Cruze bounces off of the far ropes and comes back in at Christian who catches him around the neck, going for the sleeper. However Orlando buries his shoulder to the Rising Phoenix’s spine, lifting him up into the air for a back drop.
However, Christian flips over in reverse, landing on his feet right behind Orlando who spins around into the code breaker. Orlando’s face slams hard into the raised knees of Savior, sending him flying backwards and crashing to his spine.
Comeau: The CODE BREAKER! We may have a new World Heavyweight Champion.
Moore: Poor Cruzey.
The agonizing Savior crawls into the cover, his bloodied body falling into the lateral press and hooking both of his legs. The crowd rises, wondering if a NEW World Champ is on the verge of being crowned.
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Yet again Orlando kicks out to a DEAFENING roar from the fans. Savior rises to his seat, his lower lip quivering in anger over this kick out. He rolls to his knees and glares at the referee who insists his count was by the book. Douglas begins to scream into the ring at Princeton who turns around, arguing with the IWC President. He has no idea that Savior is stepping up behind him and delivering a straight big boot right to the back of his head.
Mark: COME ON! Christian just laid out Chester Princeton.
Moore: He must have been annoyed by that stripped shirt. It just doesn’t match the pants.
The referee is down, rolling around and gripping at his skull while Savior shouts at Douglas. The IWC President rushes around the ring and grabs the steel chair off of the mats, throwing it over the ropes to Christian. The Omnipotent Opportunist catches the steel and turns with savage, deranged eyes towards the rising Orlando.
Cruze barely gets to his feet before having the chair swung with incredible force right into his back. The Icon staggers forward into the ropes, bouncing off of them and stepping back towards Christian who cracks him over the head with the chair. The steel dents around Orlando’s skull and resembles the sound of a gunshot, leaving Orlando completely laid out at this point.
Comeau: Two devastating chair shots just laying Orlando completely out! Apparently Savior is intent on winning the title the same way he got this title match.
Moore: Controlling people’s minds with his perm?
Mark: Perhaps.
Savior approaches the center of the ring and sets up the chair on the canvas before turning back towards the struggling Orlando. A gash has now been opened in the Icon’s forehead, sending a small stream of blood trickling down his face. Orlando slowly begins to roll to his side, getting to his elbows and knees before Savior takes him around the neck. Cruze is led to his feet when Christian grabs him around the neck and lifts him into an implant DDT that drops him head first into the seat of the set up chair.
Screams of despair are heard from the fans as Orlando drops to his back, laid out across the canvas with flickering eyes.
Mark: Now the implant DDT onto a chair being used to put Cruze out. There are no lengths too low for Savior to stoop to in order to win that belt.
Christian brushes the dried blood out of his eyes yet again as he shoves the chair aside then crawls into the cover. Referee Princeton is still recovering from that big boot but he looks up with groggy eyes to spot the cover. This prompts him to pull himself across the ring, slowly making the count.
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The fans are on their feet screaming.
2
Comeau: New Champion.
3!
Despair sweeps through the building before the reaction abruptly changes to cheers, Orlando lobbing his shoulder free from the canvas.
Mark: Somehow Orlando has kicked out, his aspirations of keeping that World title are still alive!
Moore: Just like the zombies in Return of the Living Dead.
A standing ovation is being given as Savior stands up and stomps hard to the back of Princeton’s head, knocking him out yet again. He now goes as far as to pull Chester to his feet and run him at the ropes, throwing him through the outside of the ring.
The Challenger now approaches the chair and sets it up yet again before grabbing Orlando around the neck. Blood is streaming down the Icon’s face as Savior pulls him to a standing base and locks him in a front chancery.
It appears that Christian is again setting up for the implant DDT onto the chair, which would surely finish Cruze off this time. That’s when Orlando twists his body, freeing it from the front chancery then stepping behind Savior and wedging his shoulder to his spine. Christian is hoisted into the air and now given the back drop suplex right on top of the chair which crumbles under his body.
Moore: HEWEY, DEWEY, AND LEWEY!
Mark: Christian’s use of the chair has backfired!
Savior drops to his spine, his back possibly broken after that last move as Cruze crawls desperately into the cover. He hooks Christian’s far leg, lifting up on it as blood oozes from both men’s bodies. That’s when Stuart Wright comes barreling from the backstage area, sliding into the ring then making the count to a huge reaction from the crowd.
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Christian kicks out right before the third slap of the canvas, leaving everyone in the building exasperated. Douglas’ hand is over his heart as he breaths uneasily. He swipes the back of his hand across his brow while in the ring a claret smeared Cruze is starting to stand up.
Comeau: A back drop onto the chair wasn’t enough to put Christian away.
Moore: That was cooler than Launchpad McQuack!
The fans are on their feet slapping the barricades and stomping their feet in excitement, creating a loud rumble that fuels Orlando. This motivation helps empower Orlando back to his feet as he approaches the struggling Savior. He takes him around the neck and pulls him to his feet when Christian rakes him across the eyes. Orlando staggers backwards, swiping his hands around his eyes when Christian comes charging in only to be caught across the chest and hoisted into the Rock Bottom.
Savior is slammed violently into the ring to a loud ovation from the fans.
Mark: The Rock Bottom, Cruze on the verge of retaining the title and putting an end to this war with Savior!
Princeton begins to drop down to make the count when an enraged Douglas jumps onto the apron, getting his attention. Dan hops all around like a madman before Wright steps towards him, demanding the President drop down off of the apron.
Moore: It looks like Dan’s trying to lead Wright in an aerobics class.
Comeau: He’s doing everything he can to distract the referee.
Douglas has no idea that Orlando has snatched something up off of the canvas and is now charging at him. The President looks up when a railroad spike is driven right between his eyes. The spike tears through Dan’s forehead, sending him crashing to the outside mats to an arena shaking ovation from the fans.
Moore: GIZMODUCK!
Comeau: Orlando just spiked Douglas right in the face. I cannot believe he just did that!
Douglas lays on the outside mats bleeding profusely from the forehead now as Orlando throws down the spike and turns around. He walks right into a spear from Christian.
Comeau: OH THE SPEAR!
Savior crawls wearily into the cover. Wright drops down and makes the count as the crowd becomes terrified.
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3
Savior is the NEW WORLD CHAMPI….no, wait, Orlando kicked out.
Comeau: Cruze getting his shoulder up! My God he kicked out, he kicked out!
Moore: Holy moly this match is crazier than Margot Kidder.
An “Orlando” chant has commenced from the crowd as Savior runs his hands over his bloody face and through his hair, in disbelief that Cruze kicked out yet again. His lower lip trembles with hostility as he sluggishly pushes himself up to his feet. Referee Wright steps over Orlando, briefly checking on his condition before spinning around and walking right into the diamond cutter from Savior. The official bounces face first off of Christian’s shoulder, sending him rolling across the canvas in an unconscious condition.
Comeau: Now Savior has taken out ANOTHER referee. Do we have anymore officials left, and why hasn’t Savior been disqualified yet?
Moore: Because the referees are big stupid pooh pooh heads and they deserve it. Finally, I sound controversial.
Mark: Your as controversial as George Bush’s hair style.
The exasperated Savior slowly begins to work his weary body to an upright base as Orlando does the same, both men bleeding in pints. Cruze finally reaches his feet when Christian lunges into the air, catching him around the neck for the diamond cutter. Orlando blocks it though by twisting his body, placing his spine to Savior’s then dragging him down into a back slide. The fans are screaming, realizing that Orlando has Christian caught only for there to be no official to make the count.
Mark: Cruze has got Christian, but there’s no referee to make the count.
Susie: SEE, their pooh pooh heads.
The crowd is screaming as none other than Alex Ingelson comes bolting down the ramp. He is dressed in regular street gear as he steps over the unconscious, bloody body of Dan Douglas and slips into the ring.
Moore: Look, it’s that skinny British emo with the horrible peroxide hair!
Mark: Alex Ingelson rushing out here. We haven’t seen him in weeks, ever since he was supposedly beaten half to death by the Conspiracy for screwing them out of the World title TWICE.
Ingelson slips under the ropes and makes the count as Christian desperately kicks his legs to escape.
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Savior kicks out, dropping over onto his knees in the nick of time. An exasperated, blood drenched Cruze starts to stand up just as Savior does the same. Christian rushes forward and is caught across the chest, Orlando yet again setting up for the Rock Bottom. That’s when Savior back elbows Orlando to the skull, then does it yet again, thus breaking up Cruze’s attempt at one of his trademark moves.
Orlando bends forward, being snatched around the head as the Rising Phoenix sets up for the elevated DDT yet again.
Mark: This could be the kill move.
At the last second the Icon shoves Christian backwards, freeing his head from the front chancery. Savior bounces off the ropes, coming back in at Orlando who bends forward for the back drop. Christian stops just short of Orlando then boots him straight to the face. The impact causes Orlando to stand upright looking incredibly dazed while Savior now tries to take his head off with the superkick. Cruze ducks it right before it could connect, Savior spinning around and walking right into the Rock Bottom.
Moore: DOOFUS DRAKE!
Mark: The Rock Bottom from Orlando, the Rock Bottom from Orlando. This has to be the end of this epic World title encounter!
Orlando sluggishly crawls into the cover, hooking Savior’s leg to a deafening roar of approval from the crowd. They are all jumping up and down with excitement as Ingelson drops to the canvas, making the count.
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3!
The fans are rejoicing, everyone giving a standing ovation until they realize that Ingelson’s hand hasn’t slapped the canvas for a third time. Instead his palm is elevated above the canvas, remaining stationary, as if frozen.
Comeau: What the….?
Susie: Alex looks like he’s in cryostasis.
Orlando looks down at Ingelson who stares up into the face of the Icon before flipping him off.
Mark: What is Ingelson doing!?!
Susie: He just gave Orlando the number one sign.
The crowd is outraged as they see Ingelson mouth the words “fuck you” to Orlando. This action result in Cruze rising to his fee as his eyes almost pop out of his skull and rage courses through every inch of his body. Obviously he wants to rip Alex’s throat out as Ingelson backs up red in the face.
Orlando has no idea that Douglas has recovered and has slid the World Championship into Christian behind Cruze’s back. The Icon grabs hold of Alex’s shirt and then pulls the formerly noble referee into a Rock Bottom position. He turns around as Alex desperately tries to finagle his way free. That’s when Orlando turns right into a World title shot between the eyes from the Rising Phoenix.
The gold cracks him right in the skull and sends Orlando plummeting into the ring, Savior throwing away the belt then dropping into the cover.
Mark: Cruze clocked with his own World title belt. This match can’t end this way, it just can’t end this way!
Ingelson drops and makes the count to screams from the fans.
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The bell chimes to the outrage of the sold out crowd. Almost the entire fanbase is standing in a collective fury, unable to believe the way this World title encounter has just concluded.
Mark: This did not just happen.
Susie: Maybe it was a hallucination caused by all the dangerous chemicals in that silly putty I’m eating.
Boos continue to swell throughout the building as Ingelson grabs the World title and gives it to Christian. The Championship is draped across Savior’s forearms as he lifts it to his smiling face, planting it against his sweaty, bloody cheek. Alex takes him by the wrist and lifts his arm up high in celebration while Douglas crawls into the ring, claret still dripping from his lacerated forehead.
He brushes Ingelson aside and lifts Christian’s arm into the air on his own to the disgust of the masses. They begin to pitch trash into the ring to show their outrage.
Comeau: Ladies and gentlemen, like it or not, and I’m still having trouble coming to grips with it myself, Christian Savior has just won the World Heavyweight title. It took repeated interference from Dan Douglas, and the screwjob by Alex Ingelson, but Christian can finally call himself the REAL World Champion.
Moore: I don’t even know what to say, mostly because I don’t know what happened.
Savior is assisted to his feet by Douglas as he now laughs and holds the World title belt up high. It dangles from the same palm being held aloft with Dan’s assistance. Both men are laughing even as they bleed buckets and are pelted with trash.
Mark: It might not be the type of history we want to be known for, but history was indeed made here tonight as a new World Champion has been crowned here at the Overbooked Extravaga….wait a minute!
Savior is suddenly spun around and pulled into the shoulder of Orlando Cruze. The bleeding Icon hoists him up high and delivers a powerful spinebuster slamming him down hard into the canvas.
Comeau: Orlando not taking this!
Susie: I’ve taken a lot, mostly from behind.
Savior is sprawled out across the canvas as Orlando gets to his feet, bleeding and sweating heavily. Alex Ingelson has already scurried from the ring in fear while Douglas grabs the World Championship and rushes straight at Orlando. Cruze catches Dan across the chest and takes a moment to absorb this moment. He now hoists Douglas into the air, driving him spine first into the canvas with the Rock Bottom.
Comeau: Orlando again dishing out his wrath to Dan Douglas!! He finally got his hands on him!
Douglas is laid across the canvas alongside the new World Champion, neither man moving. Savior’s eyes flutter as he tries his best to regain his senses. All the while a bloodied, enraged Orlando steps over the World Championship belt, lifting it slowly into the air and staring down into its glistening surface. The reception he receives is arena shaking as Orlando lifts the World title belt high above his head.
Comeau: Orlando destroying the men who just SCREWED him out of his World Championship. We have a new champion but he has been lying at the feet of the Icon. How are the Conspiracy going to deal with this? Thank you for joining us here tonight at the Overbooked Extravaganza!
The final image relayed to the viewing audience is that of Orlando Cruze standing over the bodies of the Conspiracy members and raising the World title high above his exhausted body.