OPENING VIDEO PACKAGE
The fans are shown throwing their hands into the air in slow motion, caught in different colors, with the feed freezing every so often on a crazed spectator’s features, exhilarated by what they are witnessing. It then cuts to aerial scenes of the city streets below with cars buzzing by an arena in fast motion.
If you feel so empty
So used up so let down
If you feel so angry
So ripped off so stepped on
You're not the only one
Refusing to back down
You're not the only one
So get up
The fans are again shown going even more crazy with their fists held up high, the camera freezing on a clinched set of digits, as it turns from normal color to a black and white hue. It then switches to Faust hanging upside down from one of the corners, his fangs flashing through his smiling lips. That’s before it cuts to a huge crowd of people, clamoring to enter the Manhattan Center.
Let's start a riot, a riot
Let's start a riot
Let's start a riot, a riot
Let's start a riot
Scenes cut from the crazed fans in the stands to deranged mobs throwing Molotov cocktails down the street with burning rags stuck out from the top of them. It switches quickly to Johnny Kingdom and Orlando Cruze glaring at each other awkwardly before shifting to Aurora Rose running down the ramp, with a big smile. It then cuts to Jackson Adams being choked out with a crowbar to his throat from Jon Rich before shifting to an explosion rocking through a building while it crumbles and collapses to the ground. Desolation is then featured jumping off the top of a cage roof with a shooting star press.
If you feel so filthy so dirty
so fucked up
If you feel so walked on
So painful so pissed off
You're not the only one
Refusing to go down
You're not the only one
So get up
Police are shown gathered in a straight line with shields held out in front of them, dressed in all riot gear while marching down the street. The video then switches to Silencer delivering the Break the Silence on a hapless victim. Thankfully the images transfer to Too Magnificent bashing someone over the head with a trash can before cutting to Nathan Creed maliciously glaring about his surroundings. Another image features Orlando Cruze standing on the stage and raising his arm above his head, as pyros explode on all sides of him. This image is short lived as people are featured being detained, cuffs slapped around their wrists while being forced into the backs of large police vans. Axl Evermore takes up the screen resting on his knees with the Cartel title hanging from his grasp and drenched in sweat.
Let's start a riot, a riot
If you feel so empty Let's start a riot, a riot
Let's start a riot
Let's start a riot, a riot
Let's start a riot
So used up, so let down
If you feel so angry
Just get up
Let's start a riot
Let's start a riot, a riot
Let's start a riot
Robin Brooks takes up the screen diving off the top rope with a moonsault and coming crashing down stomach first towards the camera that was aimed upwards to catch a glimpse of her in all of her acrobatic splendor. The package then showcases Jackson Adams smiling pompously into the camera before shifting to a bloodied grinning face of Psycho, his dementia clear within his wide deranged eyes. Riggs is shown springing to the top rope and then flying through the air over the barricade. Police are shown beating some looter with their knight sticks until Dan Douglas’ chuckling face overtakes the screen. Pat Evans is then the focus of attention, ripping at a victim’s ankle with a tough, yet textbook submission. That’s before images are shown of Jon Rich delivering a missile dropkick as well as Orlando giving the Rock Bottom on Desolation. It then switches abruptly to Axl Evermore standing face to face with the Ladder which holds the Cartel title. It cuts to a burning building, people running out of the flaming structure with stolen goods.
Let's start a riot, a riot
Let's start a riot
Let's start a riot, a riot
Let's start a riot
Orlando is shown standing amongst family and friends, being showered by confetti while the World Title belt is raised above his head. Abruptly the video switches to Psycho delivering the Psychotic Episode on one of his many victims before transitioning into an image of Silencer superkicking one of his opponent’s directly under their jaw. Riggs is shown seated in the corner of the ring before cutting to Pat Evans holding onto the fujiwara. The video switches to Christian Savior standing in a hallway with light hitting him from behind, almost enveloping him as a result.
RIOT!
PHANTOM & HURSE
VS.
DAVID FREAK & AURORA ROSE
There is a house in New Orleeaannnss
They call the Rissssiinnng Sun
It’s been the ruin of many a poor boy
And lord I know I’m one…
Without a moment’s delay for the opening pyrotechnics onto the stage swaggers Hurse, his features twisted with animosity. His eyes overlook the booing fans with outright disgust before lifting his nose into the air and proceeding down the ramp. A giant figure towers behind him, strolling through a layer of purple fog. The gargantuan frame belongs to Phantom, who looks more intimidating than ever on this evening as he’s forced to compete alongside Hurse in this tag team encounter. Both men only pause momentarily on their way to the squared circle to eye a giant egg that is placed off to the side of the entry way.
Mark Comeau: The time has rolled around yet again for IWC Riot!, and with no delay we’re jumping right into the action. I guess there’s a first time for everything.
Susie Moore: Yet again I’ve been denied the chance to introduce myself, I’m pouting so I’m not going to say anything for the rest of the night.
Comeau: Yay!
The only clapping in the building comes from Comeau as Hurse hops onto the apron, the Extraordinary Championship draped around his waist. Phantom climbs up onto the apron as well, giving his partner a menacing glare before stepping over the ropes into the ring. Hurse immediately progresses across the ring in the direction of the ropes, requesting the use of a microphone as one is begrudgingly given to him by ring announcer Kailey Worf.
Comeau: Well so much for opening the show with some actual wrestling for a change.
Moore: Instead we get to hear someone talk, that’s ubber creative.
Mark: Please, never use the word “ubber” in my presence again. Also, what the hell is up with that egg located on the stage, nothing good can come of this.
The camera cuts to the giant egg on the stage yet again. The fans may be drowning out Hurse’s voice with their boos but it doesn’t stop the Extraordinary Champion from speaking.
Hurse: Given my extraordinary qualities…
His hand slides across the gold plate of the belt he virtually stole from the clutches of SCW’s James Exeter.
Hurse:…that means when I speak, you listen, especially now that I have something super special to say.
Susie: Super special? I hope it has to do with re-airing the Star Wars Christmas Special.
Comeau: Never mention such blasphemy again.
The crowd’s jaded response to Hurse’s demand to listen fails to derail his announcement.
Hurse: Assuming that the Jolly Dead Giant over here doesn’t screw up our chances at victory….
Phantom smirks and shakes his head.
Hurse: ….I have a major announcement that I intend to make after this tag team match has concluded, hence my eagerness to get it over with. This night is already slated to be huge with the impending nuptials of Krissie McMorris and Nathan Creed, as well as my little Chickenlips winning the World Heavyweight Championship, but my announcement will make this telecast ten times bigger. So after we’ve finished dealing with yet another Odd Couple tag team don’t touch that dial, if TVs still even have dials, because you won’t want to miss what the Extraordinary Champ has to say.
The microphone is dropped to the canvas then kicked from the ring by Hurse, who removes his belt and pitches it to the referee. Phantom backs into a corner, watching Hurse with obvious discontent.
Paul Stanley's "Live To Win" roars over the PA system as Freak immediately appears on the stage flexing and showing off. Sparks fly about the stage as he makes his way down looking quite assured of himself and giving a second look to a few women. His eyes also give a second glance to the egg present on the stage. He reaches the ring and slides in under the bottom rope. He stands and struts to the middle of the ring flexing and raising his arms taking in both boos and cheers. Phantom and Hurse are having some dialogue with one another as it relates to the preparing Freak.
Comeau: David Freak, the Best Man for this evening’s wedding which Hurse’s eluded to, is on the verge of his first ever tag team match in the IWC, but his partner isn’t exactly what he was looking for.
Susie: If had to pick a partner, it be the Energizer Bunny, because he keeps going and going and going.
David crouches in the corner while eyeing both of his opponents, Phantom and Hurse still bickering it seems over who will start this contest. “Coming Undone” by Korn plays over the PA system and as a result the fans come out of their seats. Tonight’s Maid of Honor makes her way out onto the stage, hopping in place with her fist raised in a punk rock gesture. The fans can’t seem to get enough of the seductive yet vicious Aurora Rose, yet she doesn’t share the enthusiasm, especially when her eyes lock with Freak’s in the ring. David tilts his head and observes the incoming Aurora who climbs up suspiciously onto the apron. Surprisingly David approaches his former Awaken opponent with a smirk on his face, trying to be gentlemanly it seems, yet Aurora doesn’t seem to be buying it.
Moore: Aurora doesn’t look like she trusts Freaky, but why, is David secretly Hitler?
Comeau: In this federation, you never know. But Aurora has a right to be speculative of David’s motives, these two have collided on two separate occasions in some rather heated bouts over the past few months.
David tells Aurora to stay on the apron, volunteering his services to start out the match while Hurse does the same with an increasingly agitated Phantom.
Comeau: Well, we have no idea how these two teams are going to coexist but we’re about to find out.
Moore: Yay, I hope they can all be friends.
A tentative Hurse paces while keeping an eye on the eager Freak. The bell sounds in the background before Freak smirks and forcefully makes the tag to Aurora’s shoulder, almost knocking her from the apron in the process. He now points over his shoulder and insists she get in the ring while vacating the squared circle. An irritated Aurora slips through the cables and briefly gives David an “up yours” taunt much to his outrage.
Rose glares at Hurse now who looks unsure of himself, quickly turning and tagging in the much bigger Phantom. As a result Hurse is scowled at by the big man who begrudgingly steps over the ropes and into the ring.
Mark: Freak tagging out to Aurora and Hurse making the tag to Phantom. How indecisive are these guys.
Susie: It’s like their playing musical chairs, which sucks, because I can never win at it.
As Phantom enters the ring under duress Aurora comes barreling forward and lunging at him with a forearm to his face. The strike knocks him back first against the corner as Rose begins to stomp him repeatedly to the ribs and chop him swiftly across the sternum. She delivers a quick kick to the back of his thigh then delivers a similar blow to the other leg. She is trying her best to chop him down to size as she now steps in reverse then rushes at her gigantic opponent, lunging into the air with a front dropkick. Both of her feet connect forcefully against Phantom’s sternum as she now flips over backwards landing directly on her feet with great grace.
Comeau: Look at Rose unload on her big opponent.
Susie: She’s fast, she’s really beating up on Frankenberry.
Mark: Dear lord, here we go again, his name is Phantom.
Moore: I like Frankenberry better.
The gothic goliath remains pressed back first against the turnbuckle while Aurora comes charging in at him once again. The second she takes a single step Phantom lunges out of the corner and almost beheads her with a violent clothesline. She is driven down forcefully into the canvas across the back of her head while he kneels at her side, looking flabbergasted.
Comeau: So much for Aurora’s offensive advantage.
David tries not to laugh in his corner but he finds it very difficult. A much more intense Phantom rolls Aurora over onto her stomach and steps onto her back, putting all his weight into her kidneys. He holds onto the top rope, almost crushing her tender body beneath his massive weight. Her screams rip through the building yet she balls up her fists and sinks her teeth into them, trying to avoid the urge to give up. The official starts a five count on Phantom before he steps off of Aurora, Hurse reaching over the ropes and slapping his shoulder.
An aggressive Phantom spins to face him, rage overtaking him as Hurse points to the apron, demanding he leave the ring. Despite his desire to inflict punishment on Hurse the giant steps over the cables, allowing him to take over on Rose.
Mark: Of course Hurse wants the tag now.
Moore: Yep, why?
Hurse steps over the ropes and walks up beside the laid out Aurora, grabbing the top rope and placing his boots on her back. He holds onto the top rope and begins to stomp down with both feet right into her kidneys, picking up where Phantom left off. She grinds her teeth as he begins to hop up and down now, stomping with both feet into her spine. After several stomps he steps off and takes her around the jaw, leading her up to her feet where he promptly slugs her across the face. Rose falls against the cables while Hurse whips her off across the ring.
She springs off of the opposite cables and comes back in at the Master of Control who catches her with a back drop. However, much to his dismay Aurora flips over completely and lands gracefully on her feet. Hurse turns around to face her spine, stepping in and taking her around the waist, setting up for a German suplex. She gabs his arms and forces them away from her mid-section though before lunging into the air and connecting with a reverse dropsault. Both of her boots firmly wedge themselves to Hurse’s sternum as he is kicked off and sent crashing to the canvas.
Comeau: Hurse being dropkicked hard by Aurora.
Susie: He was dropped like a sack of….uh…um…. broccoli?
Mark: Your brain fails to function.
In astonishment Hurse rolls across the canvas and gets back to his feet, looking stunned as he comes barreling towards a rising Aurora. Rose gets to her feet then springs into the air, hitting another dropsault, this one not of the inverted variety. Once again the former World Champion plummets to the ring, rolling around and gripping at his sternum while Rose gets to her feet and backs towards one of the corners. She wedges herself against it while a reeling Hurse gets to his feet and staggers into the enemy corner. Freak holds his hands up, showing the referee that he isn’t touching the reeling Hurse while Aurora comes cartwheeling out of the opposite corner. She then back flips into a reverse elbow that connects forcefully against Hurse’s sternum, sending him into convulsions.
The second she lands on her feet David makes the tag to her shoulder, quickly entering the ring.
Comeau: Now David making the blind tag and it doesn’t look like it’s set well with Aurora.
Susie: Freaky sure can be a bully at times, Aurora was having so much fun beating up on Hurse, and it does look entertaining.
David makes only brief eye contact with Rose before approaching the reeling Hurse, blasting him over the upper back with a forearm strike. He now takes him around the jaw, leading him up to his feet and leveling him with a hard knife edge chop. A disgruntled Rose finally vacates the ring, not enjoying being forced to leave matters in her untrustworthy partner’s hands. David grabs Hurse by the hair, leading him to his feet then headbunts him, knocking him down hard into the canvas across his back.
David: Come on Mr. Former World Champion.
There is a confident swagger in Freak’s step as he pulls Hurse up then scoops him down maliciously into the canvas. Once he’s been planted against the ring David rushes into the ropes at his side, bouncing off then stepping back in and lunging high into the air. He extends his leg planting it right across Hurse’s throat. The Master of Control sits up reaching for his neck while David boots him hard to the back of his cranium.
Mark: David decimating Hurse.
Moore: Ewww, alliteration.
The increasingly cocky Freak drags Hurse up to his feet and blasts him across the side of the jaw via a vicious forearm strike. Hurse is reeling backwards into the ropes when Freak takes him by the wrist and attempts to whip him off across the ring. At the last second Hurse puts the breaks on it, turning to face David then slapping down at his wrist so that he can free his hand. Hurse spins around into a roaring forearm that Freak ducks under. David turns to face his opposition who now drops onto his back, Freak reaching down to grab him only to have his opponent’s feet wedged to his sternum and to be kicked off. David crashes onto his back, rolling in reverse onto his knees while the Alpha Gen representative slowly begins to get up.
Freak now ducks his head, placing the top of it to the canvas then nipping off of it, launching himself right at Hurse who lunges into the air catching him with a dropkick. Hurse’s feet are planted directly to David’s face, sending him almost flipping over completely backwards. He crashes to the canvas while Hurse lunges to his feet then jumps over him, continuing into the cables where he springs to the second rope. He flies off backwards into a moonsault crashing down right on top of David’s sternum, quickly hooking his leg.
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2
David is able to power his shoulder from the ring.
Mark: Hurse getting in some offense on David in what has been an extremely fast paced tag team encounter thus far.
Moore: This is just like a Jet Li movie, only there’s no robotic acting.
The crowd has a mixed reaction over that last sequence of moves as Hurse takes David by the wrist, trying to drag him up to his feet. Freak bridges himself up slightly and then falls sideways away from Hurse, tugging him down into an arm drag. The Alpha Gen member is sent rolling forward across the canvas right onto his feet as he backs into the ropes where Phantom makes the tag over the top rope. He slaps Hurse’s shoulder, knocking him forward towards David who is rushing in with a big boot. Hurse drops into a forward roll, avoiding the strike while David continues forward into the ropes where he is blasted hard to the forehead by Phantom.
The closed fist knocks him backwards into Hurse who catches him by the back of the head, rushing at the cables then jumping over them. He drags David down throat first into the cables, knocking him backwards into Phantom who has entered the ring and catches the smaller Freak against his shoulder. He hooks his leg and his neck then snaps back into a bridging Regal suplex.
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2
David lobs his shoulder from the canvas, barely avoiding the three count in this increasingly intense tag team encounter.
Comeau: Some shocking team work just displayed by Phantom and Hurse. That’s something I wasn’t expecting to see.
Moore: I tell you what I didn’t expect, the ending to the Crying Game, although to be honest I didn’t really understand it.
Mark: And I’m not about to explain it to you either.
Aurora wipes fake sweat from her brow, trying to feign fear over her team losing this match, although she clearly doesn’t give a damn. An aching Freak rolls away from the larger Phantom who now stomps down on the back of his head, he pushes on his knee with his massive palm to exert more pressure. David is roaring as he tries to shove the foot off of his cranium but can’t get it off, the official starting a five count. He reaches four before Phantom drops a knee straight into the back of David’s cranium, causing the young agile star to convulse.
Phantom rises to his feet and slaps his hand down around the back of Freak’s head, lifting it up on it. He raises him to his knee and clamps his hand down around his shoulder, applying a nerve hold. Pain flows all throughout David’s body as he sluggishly tries to get up even with the damage being inflicted by this hold. Aurora apathetically tries to rally the fans behind Freak, clapping her hands drearily together.
Moore: Look Aurora’s a supportive partner, well, tag team partner at least. Te-he, I just took a shot at her relationship issues. I should be an insult comic.
Mark: Yeah, you’re a real Lewis Black.
Susie: Who?
Phantom continues to squeeze with every ounce of raw aggression deep within him, keeping David grounded until he slowly begins to progress his way towards his feet. He grits his teeth, his skin transforming to a dark shade of red the closer and closer he gets to a standing base. Once he’s upright Phantom breaks the nerve pinch and clubs him violently over the upper back. He takes him by the back of the head and shoves him forward into the cables, trying to throw him through them. However, David jumps into the air, hitting the top rope with the back of his head which sends him landing back on his feet in the ring. He then springs into the air and twists with a violent kick that connects directly to Phantom’s face. The giant is taken down with Freak landing on all fours beside him.
Susie: Ew, Freak is just Captain Fantastic, he’s made of elastic.
Mark: I’m not sure I’d go that far but that last move certainly was a creative counter.
The agile David rolls away from the laid out Phantom then drops down into a forward roll across the canvas, flipping out of into a rolling thunder. He crashes down right across Phantom’s ribs, sitting up at his side and looking spent. After connecting with the move he grips his back and rolls towards Aurora, who is eager for the tag.
Comeau: David looking to be on the verge of tagging out to Aurora, some rare continuity displayed.
Moore: They look like they’re going to be friends, which is good since they’ll both be at the wedding tonight. I can’t wait to have a helping of that cheese platter.
A leery David reaches out for the tag, his hand hovering just inches away from Aurora. He is about to lunge forward and slap it before Rose suddenly retracts her fingers and acts like she’s yawning. Rage clouds David’s eyes as he rises to his knees, glaring at the impending Maid of Honor with devilish intentions.
David: What are you doing?
Aurora holds a finger up to Freak, asking for a moment as she continues to yawn and stretch her body. In anger he gets up, reaching out to slap her in when Phantom grabs hold of his shoulder, spinning him around. Freak is taken under the arm and by the back of the head, Phantom throwing him half way across the ring. David catches tremendous height then comes tumbling down hard back first into the canvas. Hurse nods with a smile on the apron, sticking his hand out and demanding a tag. Phantom marches towards his laid out opponent, refusing to reciprocate Hurse’s request for a tag.
Phantom: You ain’t my daddy!
He grabs David around the noggin, leading him up to his feet then delivering a vicious headbunt. The collision knocks Freak to the canvas, grabbing at his head then rolling towards the corner. He grabs the ropes, dragging his aching body to his feet.
Comeau: Aurora refuses to tag in and Phantom refuses to tag out. Boy what an unstable tag team encounter we’re witnessing here.
Moore: This match has been shaken more than I was as a baby.
Freak presses his spine to the ropes when Phantom rushes towards him, going for a big splash. At the last second David steps out of the way causing Phantom to slam sternum first against the corner. He now staggers backwards as David springs to the second rope and flies backwards into a reverse elbow, connecting with Phantom’s sternum. Both men crash to the canvas amongst a highly mixed reaction from the crowd. After connecting Freak rolls away from his larger opposition, beginning to stand up when an over anxious Hurse enters the ring, charging at him. Before he can connect with anything Freak drills him to the shin with a low dropkick knocking Hurse down to all fours. He reaches for his leg in a crawling position while David gets up, bouncing off the ropes at his side then lunging into the air. Freak comes crashing down spine first right into Hurse’s back, driving him face first into he canvas.
Comeau: David surprisingly holding his own against Phantom and Hurse in what has now turned into a handicap match of sorts.
Moore: It’s not nice to call someone handicap, Billy.
Mark: I think we all know who’s handicap around here.
David sluggishly gets to his knees, glaring at an impatient Aurora who is once again demanding a tag into this contest. Hurse has rolled to the apron, standing up with his hand over his back, reaching out for a tag as well. Phantom begins to crawl towards him while holding his sternum, at the same time David is making his way agonizingly towards Aurora. He reaches out for a tag when Rose suddenly slips off of the apron, landing on the outside mats. She acts like she’s tweaked her knee, doing a horrible performance as she rubs at her leg and insists that she’s now injured. David slowly begins to stand up behind the ropes mumbling obscenities beneath his breath while Phantom makes the tag finally to Hurse.
Moore: Uh oh, Aurora hurt her knee, those aprons must really be slippery.
Comeau: I wouldn’t take her injury at face value.
Susie: How does a face have value?
An angered Freak is caught off guard from behind with a clubbing blow that sends him crumbling to his knees. He reaches for his spine while Hurse stomps him repeatedly over the back of the head yet somehow he starts to get up. Hurse slips through the ropes onto the apron then grabs the top one pulling himself over it. He twists his body and catches David around the neck, dragging him down into a slingshot DDT. Freak’s head crashes hard against the canvas as he turns onto his back, Hurse crawling into the cover.
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David kicks out, getting his shoulder up off of the canvas. An aggravated Hurse looks up at a crouching Phantom in his corner, who is shaking his head sadly. This invigorates Hurse to roll under the ropes onto the apron, standing up and taking hold of the top rope. He was preparing for another slingshot maneuver but Freak rolls away from him towards the center of the ring, beginning to stand up. The Master of Control alters his move, flipping over the top rope and landing on his feet when Freak almost beheads him with a brutal clothesline from hell to a tremendous reaction. Aurora feigns excitement while she sits on the outside mats reaching for her knee.
Comeau: Somehow David still sticking in there despite Aurora’s fraudulent knee injury.
Moore: Maybe she has cramps. I don’t get those myself, it’s one of the fringe benefits of never eating.
The Master of Control is left at the mercy of Freak who crawls into the cover, hooking the former Champion’s legs.
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Phantom stomps down on the back of Freak’s head, breaking up the pinfall attempt at the last second. He now grabs David by the hair and forces him up to his feet, snatching hold of his throat with both hands. On the outside of the ring Aurora is biting her nails, pretending to be frightened for her partner’s well being. Freak is hoisted into the air with Phantom going for the double handed choke bomb when David rakes his massive opponent’s eyes. As a result Phantom drops David to the canvas in front of him, Aurora now lifting her fist into the air excitedly but then grabbing at her knee, still pretending to be in pain.
As soon as David lands in front of Phantom he jumps into the air, catching him around the neck then pulling him down face first into the canvas with a leaping downward spiral. Phantom crashes off of the canvas across his forehead, rolling onto his back beside the laid out Freak.
Mark: A modified downward spiral by David, continuing to keep his team alive in this contest.
Susie: He’s going to have give his team mouth to mouth resuscitation if he wants to keep it alive. HEY, that was CLEVER.
Comeau: Somewhat, but it’s still nothing to brag about.
Phantom and Hurse are both out of it as David rolls to his knees, glaring through the ropes at Aurora who gives him a thumbs up.
Aurora: Ew, ouchie.
She reaches for her knee while winking into the direction of an increasingly flustered Freak, who sluggishly pulls himself to his feet with the use of the cables. He turns to face the struggling Hurse, who is the legal man and charges directly at him for another clothesline from hell. At the last second Hurse jumps into the air though and goes for a dropkick to counter. David side steps this attempted dropkick, swiping the legs down away from his face and sending him crashing down sternum first into the ring. He pops up to his feet albeit doubled over when David steps in popping him right under the jaw with a knee strike.
The strike causes Hurse to stand up in a severally disorientated state while Phantom is rolling to the outside of the ring. David now turns and rushes into the ropes in front of the very dazed Hurse, bouncing off the cables as he sets for the clothesline from hell. To his dismay however, Phantom reaches under the ropes, grabbing one of his feet and lifting up on it, causing David to stagger forward into the waiting arms of Hurse who catches him with a small package.
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Freak kicks out right before the three count can be made. He now rolls to his knees as Hurse stands up in front of him, charging forward only to be caught with a diving back elbow that connects right against the chest of the Master of Control. Both men are knocked to the canvas while EMTs have now gathered around Aurora, who is being assisted to her feet. She is slowly led up the ramp and towards the backstage hobbling on the completely wrong leg, having forgotten which one was supposed to be injured.
Comeau: EMTs leading Aurora to the back with her injured leg, although I have no idea which one is injured now.
Moore: Maybe it’s one of those rare alternating injuries, that causes numbness in both legs.
Mark: The only thing numb around here is your brain.
David is standing in the ring, fuming as he glares up the ramp at Aurora hobbling towards the backstage area with the assistance of the EMTs. She turns and winks in David’s direction as he trembles with rage on the inside of the ring. At that moment he is spun around and grabbed by the throat, Phantom hoisting him into the air then violently chokeslamming him right into the canvas.
Comeau: Chokeslam by Phantom! He completely and illegally took out David Freak!
Moore: This is insanity, INSANITY!
Mark: How?
Susie: I don’t know, but by shouting things it makes the events sound more dramatic.
Phantom drops down going for the lateral press only for the official to inform him that he is not the legal man. Anger sets into Phantom’s face as he slowly gets to his feet, approaching the referee who is stepping back and pointing at his shirt. This gives David just enough time to roll under the ropes to the outside of the ring, dropping to the outside mats while drenched in his own sweat, considering that Aurora has pretty much made him wrestle this whole match.
Finally the gothic giant turns to face Freak as he slowly begins to stand up on the outside of the ring, leaning against the apron. As Phantom reaches through the ropes David reveals that he’s gotten a steel chair out from under the ring. He turns and slams it with all the force of a gunshot directly into the top of Phantom’s cranium. The shot echoes throughout the arena to screams from the crowd.
Comeau: A nasty shot via the steel chair to Phantom’s skull! That was sickening. David not about to let himself be subjected to this handicap match any longer.
Moore: OUCHIE!
The chair is then thrown down to the canvas with the official having no other alternative but to repeatedly call for the bell. With furious eyes Freak turns towards the entry way.
Freak: To hell with this…no bitch is going to get the best of me!
The official has no alternative but to throw this contest out as Freak goes marching up the ramp towards the backstage area. David refusing to become a pawn in Aurora’s game here tonight, leaving Phantom seated on the canvas gripping at his cranium.
Comeau: This match officially thrown out with David caving Phantom’s head in with a chair. Aurora tried to set him up but Freak refused to fall into her trap, taking a chair to his opponent’s head to get this match called off instead of staying in there fighting against insurmountable odds.
Moore: Why must Freak and Rose keep one upping each other? Can’t they get along, at least for the sake of the wedding, or because I asked them nicely?
Mark: I suppose not.
Phantom rolls to the outside of the ring gripping at his cranium and dropping feet first to the mats while an agonizing Hurse tries to regain his composure. David doesn’t even look back as he storms through the curtains to the backstage area.
THE NEXT LEVEL
An exasperated Hurse crawls across the canvas, sweating profusely but still possessing the strength to raise his quivering fingers into the air requesting a microphone. Kailey rolls her eyes, approaching the mic that was kicked onto the mats by Hurse earlier, picking it up and giving it back to him. Phantom leans on the apron from the outside of the ring, staring inside with sweat trickling down his features and his head pounding.
Comeau: It looks like Hurse is going through with his announcement.
Moore: He should say it in Kleong to make it even more special.
Marl: Great, so not only are you an idiot but your also a Trekkie.
Every inch of Hurse may be hurting after the physicality of this tag team match yet he still forces himself to his feet.
Hurse: Just like I showed that I’m extraordinary in the ring, I’m about to prove that I’m extraordinary in all aspects of life.
Comeau: HAHAHA, sorry, I tried not to laugh.
Hurse: I think it’s time that I take things to the next level, and in order to do that I’m going to need a very special individual to come out here, someone who’s as near and dear to my heart as Alf.
Moore: I love Alf too, especially his Hawaiian shirts.
He turns towards the entry way, about to call someone out while Phantom continues to watch from ringside, somewhat unnerved by where this announcement may be heading.
Hurse: Robin Brooks, my little liverspot, I know you’re a tad bit upset with me, but I think I know the best way to make up for my idiocy as of late. Therefore, I’m asking you to please come out here so I can ask you a very important question.
Phantom’s face further tenses.
Hurse: Please Robin, you know how important this is because I asked nicely, and I hate being kind. So I’m begging you to walk down that ramp, enter this ring and hear me out.
There comes no response from the entry way as an emotional, and physically drained Hurse watches the swaying curtains anxiously.
Hurse: Robin, I realize you’re reluctant but you really need to hear this. OKAY, if you won’t come out here I know your watching somewhere in the back, so I’m going to ask anyway. Robin, please will…
Before he can so much as finish his sentence his arm is hooked from behind and he’s hoisted into the air with a half nelson back breaker right across Pat Evans’ knee. A mixed reaction emanates from the crowd at the sight of this as Hurse awkwardly bends over the knee of a man he was once grooming to bring into the Alpha Generation.
Comeau: Ahhh, Pat Evans rushing from the crowd and connecting with the Spinal Tap!
Susie: Pat’s a big bully, he didn’t even let Hurse finish his sentence, I bet it was something about saving money on his car insurance.
Hurse is still twisted over the knee of a smiling Evans, relishing in the pain he’s inflicting on the individual he once conspired with. He stands up and pulls Hurse to a standing base off of his knees, stepping behind him then shoving him forward across the ring. An aching Master of Control charges right into Christian Savior who delivers the Blaze of Glory (Spear). Savior had slid into the ring from the crowd as well, where he was laying in wait to almost tear the former World Champion in two.
Comeau: And a spear from Savior on top of the Spinal Tap!
Moore: Their tearing Hurse apart like chickens eating feces.
Mark: WHAT!?!
Susie: I’ll work on that one.
The back of Hurse’s head slams into the ring as he flips over onto his chest and stomach, lying across it. Savior crouches at his side, his skin pulsating and red. A smile rests on Phantom’s face as he strolls up the ramp without a care in the world, his back turned on his tag team partner who is being absolutely decimated at the hands of the Conspiracy. All the while he points at his head, implying that he’s too woozy to understand what’s going on.
Moore: Where is Frankenberry going, does he need to use the bathroom?
Comeau: I don’t think he cares that Hurse is being ripped to shreds by the Conspiracy, now he’ll get mommy Robin all to himself.
Phantom passes through the curtains while Hurse lays in the ring, coughing up a lung thanks to both the Blaze of Glory and Spinal Tap. Pat steps over top of his victim, bending down with his hands on his knees, staring directly into Hurse’s dreary eyes. He takes him by the hair and forces him to his feet before pitching him through the ropes like he were a piece of useless garbage. The landing on the thin mats is brutal; Hurse’s back hitting them with great force, inflicting even further damage. All the while Christian is approaching the microphone that was dropped by the Master of Control, snatching it from the canvas.
Mark: It looks like we’re about to find out why Savior and Evans have just come down here to decimate Hurse.
Susie: I hope it has something to do with the Star Wars Christmas….
Comeau: NO, NO, it has nothing to do with Star Wars, or any Christmas Specials, or any horrible George Lucas franchise rapings!
Moore: A girl can dream can’t she?
The twisted, enraged eyes of Savior overlook the fans, sending a cold chill down some of their spines.
Savior: If anyone is going to take it to the next level around here, it’s going to be the Conspiracy.
Boos flare up from the agitated spectators.
Christian: And we’re going to take it to that next level through brutality, through physicality, through punishment. We’re going to keep raising the bar in terms of violence until I’m given what I deserve, what I EARNED last week!
Pat stands back with a smirk, nodding in agreement with these statements. The Rising Phoenix marches back and forth, his words dripping with greater malice.
Savior: Orlando Cruze, the Conspiracy has only just begun to hurt people. We’re aware that you don’t care about Hurse….
Evans: I don’t even think his mother does.
Christian shrugs before continuing with his vicious verbal caveat.
Christian: Like I was saying, we know you don’t like Hurse, and don’t care about his misfortune, but there are people who you do care about. People who you would do anything to protect, thus making them the first people on our list of likely targets. But you can protect your family, your friends, anyone that you care about by simply giving me back what you stole from me last week.
Comeau: Is he asking what I think he’s asking?
Susie: If it’s for my My Pet Poney collection he ain’t gettin it.
Now Savior finds himself the one turning towards the entry way extending his hand, flicking his fingers towards himself in a “come get some” type of taunt. Pat steps out of the corner putting his forearm over Savior’s shoulder as he finishes his bold, audacious demand.
Savior: Bring out my World Heavyweight title, wrap it around my waist and you can save everyone you hold dear a great deal of suffer…..
WOW…just WOW.
A drastic alteration takes place in the fans’ reaction at the sight of Riggs and Jason Wheeler making their way through the crowd. Both men stand just under one of the balconies in the Manhattan Center, a microphone gripped in the palm of Wheeler and disgust shared between the duo.
Comeau: It’s Riggs and Wheeler! The last time we saw these two guys they were brawling with the Conspiracy.
Susie: Yep, and flying, just like Olympic Gymnasts, only without the tight fitting onesies.
Evans and Savior step towards the ropes, glaring into the crowd at the very individuals who helped ruin their well laid plans.
Wheeler: You two blow my mind almost as much as you blow each other.
The Conspiracy members shake their heads un-amused while many of the fans chuckle.
Jason: Why must you two always try to find the “easy” way to the title, do you two have any type of worth ethic or respect for yourselves at all?
Christian: HEY…
Wheeler doesn’t look too pleased by this interruption yet maintains a carefree grin on his face. An aggressive Savior continues to shout at him from the ring.
Savior: I think we’ve shown just what type of “worth ethic” we have, big brother, considering we’ve been kicking your ass all over the Manhattan Center for months, and we’re about to do the same to your painted girlfriend.
A surprisingly grinning Riggs finagles the mic from Wheeler’s hand, stepping forth to make a bold declaration.
Riggs: You two want to kick my ass so badly, then why wait any longer? What do you say that Wheeler and I come down that ramp to finish the war you two started, right now?
Smirks cut across the faces of Evans and Savior, finding this laughable before Wheeler is handed back the microphone. He shrugs his shoulders with a tilt of his head.
Wheeler: You know what, why even ask?
The microphone is dropped to the concrete as both Riggs and Wheeler bolt through the crowd and towards the ring. The duo jumps over the barricade and slides into the squared circle, jumping to their feet as they meet Evans and Savior with a barrage of right hands. The crowd is going absolutely nuts.
Comeau: Wheeler and Riggs charging the ring and going at it with the Conspiracy, this is outright insanity.
Moore: They’re fighting, yay, yay, yippee! I haven’t been this excited since that cockfight I went too, and no, there weren’t any chickens.
Referee Princeton who was helping Hurse up the ramp now just drops him and rushes to the ring, sliding in and calling for the bell.
RIGGS & JASON WHEELER
VS.
CHRISTIAN SAVIOR & PAT EVANS
CHALLENGER’S CHOICE
Pat Evans is slugging it out with Riggs while brothers brawl, Savior and Wheeler exchanging lethal right hands. Referee Princeton gets into position to call this out of control action.
Mark: We were slated to see a Challenger’s Choice tag team match later tonight, but we’re getting it underway right now as two teams of bitter rivals fight it out!
Moore: I hope they pick whatever is in the second can.
Comeau: It’s not the Pepsi Challenge, it’s the Challenger’s Choice. If Savior is pinned, whoever pins him will get a shot at the N.H.B belt, if Evans is pinned, the winner will be number one contender for his Submission title. Talk about high stakes.
An intense Evans steps in for a wild right at Riggs who ducks the shot. He turns around to face the painted warrior who hits him with a back kick to the ribs, doubling him over. Riggs now charges in and delivers a swift kick directly into his sternum, the blow knocking him backwards into the ropes. He spills through them to the outside mats, landing on his feet when Riggs grabs the top rope, pulling himself over into a crossbody. Riggs crashes directly into Evans on the outside of the ring while in the ring Savior turns, catching his own brother around the neck for the diamond cutter.
Mark: Riggs going high risk immediately and Savior already setting up for the diamond cutter on his sibling Jason Wheeler.
Moore: These two hold nothing back, just like my father’s underwear.
Before he can connect Wheeler jumps into the air, delivering a front dropkick right to Savior’s upper back. Christian is knocked forward into the ropes, tripping up and landing throat first against the middle one. Jason AKA Faust rolls in reverse to his feet then bolts across the ring, stepping between Christian’s shoulder blades then jumping over the top rope. As he comes down he catches hold of the back of Savior’s head, choking him against the middle rope.
Christian rolls onto his back gagging while on the outside Evans is being chopped violently across the sternum from Riggs. He falls back first against the barricade for support while Riggs jabs him to the jaw, then does it yet again, inflicting a great deal of damage. Riggs steps back and jumps to the apron now, rushing across it and diving off at Evans who steps out of the way at the last second. As a result Riggs collides hard shoulder first against the barricade, bashing off of the steel.
Comeau: This match just consuming the entire ringside area.
Moore: If they come over here I’m taking my Treasure Troll dolls and running for the hills, your on your own Mark.
Mark: Is that a promise? I hope so.
Wheeler climbs up onto the apron as Christian gets to his feet, reeling from the fast paced action. Jason ducks his head, flipping over the top rope, his legs landing on Christian’s shoulders before he lets go of the ropes. He twists his body and sends the N.H.B Champ flipping forward, colliding hard with the canvas spine first. Evans has pulled Riggs to his feet at this point and now scoop slams him down spine first right across the top of the barricade. His back arches across the steel and his face twists with pain before he tumbles into the front row, the fans trying to help him up.
Susie: Oh, Riggs was just bent like a, ummm, uhhh, carrot, over that barricade.
Mark: A carrot? Honestly, that’s the best you can do? That wasn’t even slightly funny.
Moore: It was meant to be?
Inside of the ring Jason has dragged Savior up to his feet, throwing forearms into the side of his face. He backs him up into one of the corners then comes charging forward, jumping into the air for a diving lariat. At the last second Savior steps out of the way causing Jason to hit the top rope sternum first, ending up in a seated position across the middle one. A dazed Christian steps up behind his brother, showing no remorse as he takes him around the head then drops down into a reverse facebuster. Jason is pulled down off the second rope, his legs stick stuck over it as the back of his cranium collides with great force against the canvas. He is almost stuck in a tree of woe position as a result.
Mark: And now a reverse facebuster from the second rope! These guys really busting one another up in what we knew would be a heated tag team encounter.
Moore: I don’t feel any heat, unless it’s the sexual type.
Comeau: No offense, but I’m going to scoot my chair away from yours a little.
Savior gets up and grabs the leg and arm of Wheeler, dragging him out of the corner to the center of the ring where he drops down into the cover.
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Jason launches his shoulder from the canvas, just barely avoiding the three count after that vicious reverse facebuster. An aggravated Savior gets up and on unbalanced legs approaches Evans who is now waiting in the corner. He reaches out slapping his hand then turns back towards his laid out brother. Savior rushes forward and jumps high into the air, coming down with a knee drop right into Jason’s face, causing his lower body to kick into the air. Right behind Christian charges Evans, who throws his body up into the air and comes crashing down leg first across Wheeler’s throat. Savior rolled out of the way just in time, waiting for Evans to get up.
Christian now comes charging in when Pat catches him against the abdomen, throwing him up high into the air. He steps out of the way as Savior flips over and comes crashing down from a tremendous height into a senton bomb right across Wheeler’s ribs.
Comeau: Some nice tag team continuity shown between Evans and Savior, who started out being dominated but now have become the aggressors themselves.
Susie: Oh no, not one of these matches with transitions, they make me car sick? Do you have anything salty I can put in my mouth?
Mark: Too easy.
The official demands that Savior vacate the ring yet he refuses to adhere to his demands. Instead he takes hold of Wheeler’s hair, dragging him up to his feet and gripping one of his wrists, Evans takes hold of the other one. A battered Jason is backed into the corner and whipped across the ring into the opposite ropes by both Conspiracy members. He bounces off coming back in at his rivals who bend forward for a double back drop. Right before they can connect with their tag move Jason stops in front of them and sticks his leg out over the back of Pat’s neck, going for a famouser. The Submission Champion urgently stands up causing Wheeler to be flipped over backwards, landing on his feet.
As soon as he gracefully lands Evans throws a lariat at him, Wheeler ducking it and charging right into Christian, who catches him with a tilt a whirl. Jason counters out of it into almost a head scissors, spinning around Savior’s body twice before catching him around the neck and pulling him down out of the tilt a whirl into a DDT. Savior’s skull bounces forcefully from the canvas while Jason lays on his back, looking drained.
Comeau: Amazing counter and athleticism just displayed by Wheeler!
Moore: He spun around Savior so many times he made me dizzy. Of course I get dizzy watching the Three Stooges.
An aggravated Pat turns to spot his laid out partner and the laid out Wheeler, storming towards his opponent. Suddenly Jason rolls backwards doing a headstand and wrapping his shins around Pat’s neck. He pulls down with his legs and flips Evans over, sending him crashing spine first into the ring. Riggs is starting to display some mobility on the outside mats after being viciously scoop slammed into the barricade, reaching for his spine as he desperately crawls towards his corner.
The highly motivated Wheelers rolls backwards to his feet then charges at the ropes, jumping over them onto the apron. He grabs hold of the top rope, shaking it with anticipation as both Evans and Savior sluggishly begin to rise side by side. Wheeler springs to the top rope and takes flight, soaring across the ring into a double front dropkick that connects with both Christian’s and Pat’s sternums.
Moore: Jason is flying all around the ring like he thinks he’s still a vampire. He’s not is he, I just got comfortable sleeping with the lights off again.
Mark: That’s quite the achievement Susie.
Susie: Yes, all I need is my Rainbow Bright Night Light and I’m gravy.
The Conspiracy reps are taken to the canvas, Wheeler falling to his back with force. He looks towards his corner where Riggs is just now starting to pull himself up onto the apron, still reaching for his kidneys in great pain. Savior finally rolls from the ring with the assistance of referee Princeton while Wheeler drags Evans up to his feet.
Once upright Jason drills Evans to the jaw, hitting forearm after forearm to his already dazed opponent before taking him around the neck and charging forward for a bulldog. Pat pushes him off at the last second, sending Wheeler charging into the ropes which he hops into, landing on the second cable. The agile Wheeler springs off and twists in mid-air towards his opponent for the crossbody only to have Evans catch him across his sternum. Pat whips Wheeler around his body into a back breaker across his knee from the Fall Away slam position.
Comeau: Big reversal by Evans, getting his team back in this match perhaps!
Moore: That could of busted Wheeler’s ovaries.
Mark: You seriously need sexual education classes.
Susie: Perv.
Pat keeps Wheeler draped across his knee, standing up and pulling his dazed opponent to his feet as well. The cunning Evans steps behind Jason, pulling him backwards into his shoulders then standing up with his rival in a reverse fireman’s carry position. He now slips Wheeler from his back, sending him crashing to the canvas with an Alpamare Waterslide. The force in which Jason hits the ring as a result of the side death valley driver is absolutely vicious, his softened up back connecting with tremendous force. Riggs calls out for his partner to get up now that he’s regained his own faculties, reaching out for the tag.
Unfortunately Jason is in no position to make said tag as Evans steps over his legs, the Submission Champ grabbing hold of his legs then tucking them under his pits. He pulls Wheeler over onto his chest as he locks in a liontamer, rearing back as far as he can and ripping at the legs. Jason’s spinal column is almost ripped in half by the awkward bending of his body at the hands of Pat. Evans gains a great deal of solace from Wheeler’s suffrage as Jason deliberately pushes himself to his elbows, eyes focused on the ropes. The crowd is slapping the barricades and stomping their feet to rally behind him.
Susie: Oh no, there’s some kind of earthquake going on, quick, protect by bosom.
Comeau: Although you don’t have to ask me twice this isn’t an earthquake, it’s the fans rallying behind Wheeler, trying to give him the motivation to reach those ropes.
Moore: Really? Shame on all you people for scaring me then.
Jason digs his fingers into the canvas then begins to pull himself painstakingly in the direction of the ropes which remain far from the reach of his hands. A malicious Evans continues to rip and tear at his spine via the liontamer, sitting down almost on his shoulder blades in the process. Despite this physical brutality Jason finds strength from the pleas of his partner and the cheers of the fans, reaching out to wrap his hand around the bottom cable. His index finger just reaches it, wrapping around the rope to a tremendous ovation.
Moore: And now Wheeler is choking the rope with his index finger.
Comeau: No, he’s grabbing hold of it and forcing Evans to break his submission.
The official steps in starting a five count and reaching four before Evans breaks the hold. He immediately proceeds to stomp at the back of Wheeler’s head and shoulders, inflicting as much punishment as possible until he takes him around the waist. Wheeler tries to hold onto the ropes but can’t upon being hoisted into the air with a wheelbarrow release German suplex. Jason flies half way across the ring then comes tumbling down hard spine first right into the canvas, ricocheting from its surface.
The possibly broken body of Wheeler flips over to his knees, remaining there in a truly disorientated condition. He is taken by the hair before he can fall to his back, being dragged towards the enemy corner where Evans makes the tag to an eager Savior. With urgency the N.H.B Champion scales the turnbuckle, reaching the top rope right as Pat lifts Jason into a Canadian backbreaker across his knee. He keeps Jason in this prone predicament long enough for Savior to fly off the top rope into an elbow drop right to Jason’s sternum. The impact causes Wheeler to flip backwards off the knee of his opposition.
Comeau: Again some tag team work displayed by Savior and Evans of the Conspiracy.
Moore: I thought they were just a makeshift team, like the Megapowers.
Mark: Well they certainly do have the egos.
An aching Jason falls to the canvas across his stomach while his brother steps over his legs, wedging his feet to the back of his knees. He takes Jason by the wrists and now drops to his seat, pulling Wheeler up into a modified Mexican surfboard. The second that Wheeler finds himself in this predicament, Evans comes charging in delivering an absolutely devastating knee lift right into Jason’s jaw. The crowd grimaces at the sound of this stiff knee lift from Evans on the completely exposed cranium of the former 6 time SCW World Champion.
At that instant Savior releases Wheeler’s wrists, allowing him to fall forward to the canvas. He then rolls over Jason’s back, ending up on his knees in front of his laid out brother, taking him around the jaw then flipping forward. Savior is now bridging over top of Jason’s back, pulling up on his chin and arm.
Comeau: Savior has got Jason trapped in a bridging arm triangle choke.
Moore: Why didn’t you let me call the move?
Mark: You can barely even tell the difference between a punch and a kick so I doubt you’d be able to handle something this complex.
Referee Princeton is right in Wheeler’s face, inquiring as to rather or not he wishes to submit. However, Jason is vehemently opposed, shouting “no” with defiance and again reaching out for the ropes with his one free arm. Riggs is shouting at him from the corner for a second time, trying to motivate Wheeler to grab the cables and save himself. As Jason agonizingly begins to crawl towards these very ropes, Savior flips over backwards, landing on his knees right in front of his laid out estranged sibling. Viciously he throws his knees into the top of Wheeler’s head, inflicting a great deal of damage as a result.
Mark: And now brutal knees delivered to the head.
Official Princeton requests that Savior stop using the knees only to receive a middle finger as a result. Christian reaches out and tags in Evans, his partner sliding into the ring then proceeding to stomp Wheeler’s lower back. All the while Savior holds down on his brother’s head, keeping him from being able to defend himself as Evans continues to stomp at his battered torso. Savior steps back now as Evans grabs Wheeler’s ankle, lifting up on it and causing him to stand on top of his head. The back of his knees land on top of Christian’s shoulders as he dead lifts Jason into the air in a powerbomb position.
Pat rushes into the cables behind Savior, slipping through the ropes onto the apron then springing to the top cable. He shows remarkable athleticism as he comes flying from the top rope and soaring through the air, going for a modified version of the Doomsday Device. Wheeler ducks his head however, causing Pat’s arm to miss his head as he comes crashing down to the canvas. He now slips over top of Christian’s head, sliding down his back and catching him around the waist, rolling him up into a sunset flip.
Savior rolls in reverse out of the pinfall predicament and onto his feet, charging backwards into the cables which he bounces off. An intense Christian charges back towards Jason who catches his inbound brother stomach first against his feet, launching him over his head with a monkey flip. Evans stands up in time to turn and have Christian crash upside down back first directly into his sternum, both men collapse to the canvas stacked on top of one another.
Comeau: Ohhh, big move from the super athletic Wheeler. A momentum changing move in fact.
Moore: He just threw Christian at Pat, that was super cool.
The Manhattan Center crowd is erupting over that last move as Jason gets to his feet and rushes into the ropes to the side of both his rivals who remain stacked on top of each other. He jumps into the air and lands feet first on the top rope, moonsaulting over backwards only to twist at the last second and connect with a modified senton right across the stomachs of both men.
Susie: AYE CARUMBA!
Mark: Another athletic move from the 6 time SCW World Champion, laying waste to both his opponents at the same time.
Evans and Savior sit up clutching their ribs in pain while Wheeler rolls sluggishly across the canvas, reaching for his spine. Riggs is more eager now than ever for the tag, leaning over the ropes as far as possible with his hand thrust outward. Every finger twiddles with anticipation for the tag as Jason agonizingly begins to crawl towards him, every muscle in his body hurting after all the punishment he’s endured thus far. His hand slowly begins to reach out for the tag when his ankle is grabbed from behind by his own brother. Savior lifts up on Jason’s leg, puling his body off of the canvas and throwing it back away from Riggs.
Comeau: Savior doing a good job of keeping Wheeler away from Riggs.
Moore: That shouldn’t be allowed, it’s cheating.
Wheeler rises to his knees as Savior rushes at him for a boot to his face only to have Jason roll under it. He rolls across the canvas then dives forward, slapping the outstretched hand of Riggs to a tremendous reaction from the crowd. Pat stands up at Savior’s side, spinning his partner around as both men rush towards the painted apparition. Riggs jumps over the top rope, twisting and coming down feet first onto the turnbuckle which he springs off of into a double back elbow. His elbow points connect with both Savior and Evans, knocking both men down hard to the canvas.
Mark: Riggs tagged in and already unloading with some explosive offense.
Moore: If it was explosive there’d be bright shinny explosions that would hypnotize me.
Riggs nips up to his feet then turns towards a kneeling Evans, almost beheading him with a buzzsaw kick right to the side of the skull. The impact echoes throughout the arena s Evans tumbles to his back, Riggs going into a full spin so that now his back is directed towards Savior. Wheeler now comes charging in and jumping into the air, landing on top of his shoulders. Riggs turns towards Christian and pushes Jason out of the powerbomb position into a corkscrew moonsault, sending him crashing down right on top of his sibling.
Jason rolls out of the way as Riggs now flips forward into a senton leg splash right across Savior’s throat.
Comeau: Nice moves by Riggs and Wheeler in this fast paced brawl.
Moore: These guys keep using flashy moves, how am I expected to keep up with all this action? Performance enhancing drugs?
Mark: Believe me, no drug on earth could help you.
The crowd is super excited by all this action as Riggs rolls away from the laid out Christian, beginning to get to his feet. As soon as he places one foot on the canvas, an upright Evans comes barreling in, stepping off of his raised knees then hitting a shinning boot right to the side of Riggs’ painted features. The hard boot knocks Riggs out cold as Evans lands on all fours beside him.
Moore: So much for the babyface team come back, and here I thought that was mandatory in these matches.
Evans rolls to his feet as Jason cartwheels across the canvas then lunges out of it into a twisting corkscrew kick that connects hard right against Pat’s face. The Submission Champion is almost knocked out cold as a result, crashing into the canvas while Wheeler rolls away from him in the direction of the ropes. He rolls right under them, standing up on the apron then taking the top cable as Christian painstakingly begins to stand up in the ring. The N.H.B Champion is hunched forward gripping at his ribs while Jason springs to the top rope, flying half way across the ring then landing on Savior’s shoulders. To his dismay Christian counters by dropping into a devastating sit-out powerbomb.
Susie: GUACAMOLE!
Comeau: Another big counter into the sit out powerbomb! What chaotic action here.
Savior leans forward shoulders first into the back of Wheeler’s legs, going for the pinfall as official Princeton informs him that neither of them are the legal participants in this contest. Savior is just about to protest when Riggs comes charging in, jumping over top of his laid out partner and connecting with the shinning wizard directly to the champion’s face. Savior is knocked to the canvas while Riggs rolls away from him listening to a huge standing ovation from the crowd.
He now begins to stand up when a disorientated Evans staggers up behind him, catching hold of his arm. Riggs is lifted into the air for the Spinal Tap only to have him twist his body free at the last second, landing right behind his rival’s back. Riggs takes him under the arms, dragging him down into a crucifix pin, the crowd screaming as they realize this may be all she wrote.
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Evans kicks out by rolling in reverse, quickly getting to his feet as does his opponent. As soon as both men stand up Riggs hoists Pat up into the air and onto his shoulder in position for the Hopskotch (Michinoku Driver II). At the last second Evans slips off of his shoulder landing right behind Riggs then shoving him forward into a rising Wheeler. Both men bump noggins as a result, Jason crashing to the ring while Riggs staggers backwards into Pat’s waiting arms. Riggs’ arm is hooked and he’s now hoisted into the Spinal Tap right across Pat’s knee. The vicious back breaker sends the painted warrior into convulsions as he tumbles to the canvas, Evans crawling into the cover.
Comeau: And the Spinal Tap may be all she wrote.
Moore: All she wrote? Is Angela Lansbury dictating our actions?
The fans are booing as Evans has Riggs pinned, Princeton making the count.
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2
3!
Evans has done it, he and Savior are victorious…no, wait, Riggs kicked out just before the three count. As a result Pat’s eyes widen and fill with sheer disbelief, shaking his head out of refusal to accept this.
Comeau: Riggs getting his shoulder up right before the three count even after the Spinal Tap. What more do these two teams have left to throw at each other?
Moore: Feces? Hey, it works for monkeys.
Pat sluggishly rises to his feet and turns towards a rising Wheeler, who is really aching from the overall physicality of this encounter. Evans braces himself then connects with a hard thrust kick right under Jason’s jaw. The shot echoes throughout the arena and leaves Wheeler extremely dazed as he slowly turns in a circle somehow remaining upright. As soon as he turns to face him Pat charges in for a devastating lariat only to be caught with the Claim to Fame (Sky High Press). Pat is driven hard to the canvas between the seated legs of Wheeler who then falls to his back, unable to make a pin in his exhausted condition. The crowd is really pumped by all they’ve witnessed in this encounter, unleashing a standing ovation for this tremendous back and forth action.
Mark: What a historic tag team match we’re witnessing tonight on Riot!, these two teams are doing nothing short of destroying each other.
Moore: Their gonna have some booboos after this one.
Wheeler slowly gets to his feet and grabs Pat by the ankle, lifting up on it and rolling him over in reverse onto his feet. He boots Pat to the ribs then grabs him around the neck, signaling for the Darkness DDT. That’s when Christian staggers in out of nowhere blasting Jason right under the jaw with a superkick. The shot knocks him onto his back as Pat grabs Wheeler’s legs and now rolls forward into a jackknife cover.
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No, Wheeler gets his shoulder up just before the three count, enraging Savior and Evans. Christian steps in with Pat, grabbing both of Jason’s wrists and dragging him up to his feet. As soon as Wheeler is stood, Savior goes charging into the cables in front of him. He bounces off and comes barreling back in as Pat whips Jason towards his partner for a high impact spear. At the last second Riggs charges in and shoves Wheeler out of the way, causing Savior to spear him instead. Riggs is taken down hard to the canvas across his back, having sacrificed himself as Savior stands up in shock turning towards his brother.
Comeau: Riggs sacrificing himself to save his tag team partner!
Moore: Awww, that’s so sweet, he’s like a painted Jesus.
Riggs grips at his ribs and rolls across the ring while Wheeler starts to painfully get to his feet. Evans moves up behind him to possibly hit the Spinal Tap when at that instant Savior comes barreling towards his opponent for another spear. Wheeler jumps into the air, causing Savior to charge under him and almost shatter Pat’s ribs with the Blaze of Glory. Evans slams hard into the ring while Savior looks down at his partner in shock.
Comeau: Christian just speared Evans!
Moore: He’s spearing everyone. Who next, George Bush?
Mark: It be nice, but Dick Cheney would be even nicer.
Christian stands up with his eyes brimming with disbelief, turning slowly towards his brother who takes him out via a kick to the ribs then places him in a front chancery. Before Savior can counter he’s dragged down into the Darkness DDT. His face crashes off of the canvas and he now rolls onto his back while Wheeler rolls under the ropes to the outside of the ring. He stands up on the apron, taking the top rope then springing onto it before flipping through the air with a springboard 450 splash. All of his weight comes crashing down right on top of his brother to a huge reaction.
Comeau: The Nightfall connects on Savior!
Moore: Does Wheeler think he’s an Olympic diver? He doesn’t even have the waxed legs, at least I don’t think he does.
The Manhattan Center is rocking as Pat somehow stands up to save his partner only to have Riggs charge in, jumping into the air with a spinning heel kick. He connects to Evans’ throat, knocking both men over the top rope to the outside of the ring. The official drops down, forgetting the legal man rule in favor of making the count for Wheeler.
1
2
3!
A resounding ovation echoes throughout the arena as Wheeler has just picked up a pinfall over Christian, meaning he is now number one contender for the N.H.B Championship.
Comeau: Wheeler has just pinned Savior, his own brother in the center of this ring! He’s gotten himself a measure of revenge.
Moore: Silly Mark, you can’t measure revenge, and I don’t even know how to use a ruler.
The fans are still going bonkers over this win as Wheeler rises to his knees, lifting his arm up high in victory. He winces in pain while rising to his feet, still celebrating. He has no idea that outside of the ring Riggs is being whipped by Evans head first right into the steel steps. The weakened painted warrior slams head first into the steps which barely budge, making the collision all the more devastating.
Comeau: The match may be over, but that isn’t stopping Pat Evans.
Moore: He just threw that nice painted guy into the steps. Quit taking out your frustrations on the stairs Pat.
Wheeler stands up in the ring, still celebrating his victory when Evans slides in behind him, grabbing his shoulder and spinning the Black Cat around. A boot is delivered to the shocked Jason’s ribs as he’s hoisted into the air and placed in a crucifix. Evans rushes across the ring then pitches Wheeler half way across the squared circle into a crucifix bomb. Jason slams hard into the canvas amongst a resoundingly negative response.
Mark: New N.H.B title contender Wheeler just thrown completely across the ring!
Moore: This must be a new Olympic event, Wheeler tossing.
Comeau: This has nothing to do with the Olympics, and everything to do with bitterness.
An aching Riggs rises onto the apron, trying to come to Wheeler’s aid as he begins to slide through the ropes into the ring. That’s when an exhausted Savior gets up and catches him with a diamond cutter. He pulls Riggs down through the cables face first into the ring. His paint is smeared across the canvas as he rolls across the ring towards Wheeler. Christian stands up with the assistance of the cables, still looking groggy and incoherent after taking that 450 splash from his own sibling.
To further aggravate and concern the crowd Evans has now pulled a chain out of his pocket, wrapping it delicately around his knuckles. He slams it against his fist while Savior points at Wheeler, insisting he take off the head of their common arch rival.
Okay, okay, okay, I think they’ve had enough boys, after all, I want them slightly coherent for the next announcement.
The battered bodies of Riggs and Wheeler try to get up while glaring towards the big screen, Evans and Savior backing away with rage in their eyes.
CHANGING THE GAME
Dan Douglas: Congratulations gentlemen, bravo!
A smarmy grin resides on the face of IWC President Dan Douglas as it takes over the titontron. Every eye regrets having seen it as he condescendingly offers an applause for the exhausted Riggs and Wheeler in the ring. Their battered torsos glare towards the screen. Their frames are in horrid condition yet they still possess the strength to give the screen a truly intimidating stare.
Douglas: That was quite the effort; let’s hear it for them people. COME ON, get out of your seats, put your hands together.
A winded Pat Evans and Christian Savior continue to stand back, laughing over Douglas’ statements as he goes on, the anger within Wheeler and Riggs intensifying. They can tell just how full of shit he truly is as he continues to motion for the crowd inside of the arena to stand up and put their hands together.
Dan: Wheeler, Riggs, you two know how to stick it to me so well, so I must applaud the effort you put into disrupting my authority.
He half heartedly claps himself, trying his best to look sincere as both Riggs and Wheeler grow increasingly angry in their damaged conditions.
Douglas: But you know what, I think it’s time that the shoe went on the other foot, that I turned the other cheek sort of speak. It’s time that I changed the game and started to disturb your well conceived plans. Riggs, your going to wish you hadn’t slapped away my hand when I offered it to you….
Riggs’ face twists with both pain and hostility.
Dan: And Wheeler, it’s high time that you realized your antics are not only idiotic but intolerable.
Wheeler’s skin pulsates with rage.
Douglas: And ultimately, the two of you are going to regret ever forming your little alliance, because the greatest enemies are former friends, those who know you best. You’re going to come to understand this philosophy come time for the Overbooked Extravaganza. I’ve put together what should be a marginally entertaining match, for me at least, because at the pay-per-view, it’s going to be Jason Wheeler going one on one with Riggs. Hahahaha.
This announcement doesn’t sit well with either Riggs or Jason, the two looking at each other in their bruised, battered conditions while the crowd screams and Douglas’ laughter rips throughout the arena.
Comeau: What twisted decision making from our owner. At the Overbooked Extravaganza it’s going to be Riggs versus Jason Wheeler.
Moore: How can buddies be expected to fight? That’s like Optimus Prime fighting Bumblebee.
COMMERCIAL BREAK
WEDDING BELLS ARE CHIMING
Yeah, I think I tweaked or strained a muscle or something.
Rather poorly Aurora tries to act her way through yet another injury, seated on a cot in the back with her leg elevated in the air. Her ankle is being carefully looked over by an elderly EMT, pushing on the muscles to see if they cause her any pain.
Aurora: Ew, owie, that smarts.
Her painful reactions sound quite rehearsed, Aurora forcefully squinting and biting her lower lip in an attempt to convey her anguish.
Krissie McMorris: Oooh nooo, did you get a booboo?
The crowd’s boos echo throughout the corridors as McMorris stands over an irritating Krissie, lavishly dressed in her expensive wedding gown. McMorris tilts her head looking sympathetically down at a sweaty and acting Rose while some type of green dress hangs over her forearms.
Aurora: Yep, looks like I aggravated that old ankle injury.
Krissie puts her palm over her shocked mouth, shaking her head in obvious dismay.
Krissie: Oh no, you don’t say.
Aurora: Um yeah, I do say, and it looks like I won’t be able to serve as your Maid of Honor now.
The thought of avoiding the forced marriage tonight brings a smile to Aurora’s face that she tries hard to hide. This news leaves Krissie greatly saddened, her shoulders slouching to her sides and her gently shaking.
Krissie: Aw, how tragic, and yet unlikely.
Rose’s face twists with not pain but hostility as she hears the audible change in Krissie’s voice, her tone becoming much more malicious. The forced sympathy is dropped and replaced by a spiteful glare from the deranged bride.
McMorris: Come off it Aurora, if you really think I’m going to let you stay back here plotting ways to sabotage my wedding then your sadly mistaken.
Rose: Jeez, and here I thought you were a paranoid bitch.
Her response elicits outrage from the condescending McMorris.
Krissie: I didn’t get this far without being a little paranoid, and a HUGE bitch. Your coming to that ring tonight because I want to keep my eyes on you, I don’t want any last minute surprises ruining my wedding. Now HERE!
A Maid of Honor dress is shoved into Aurora’s chest as the doctor who was overlooking her ankle finally clears out of harms way. Aurora’s is clearly appalled by the attire thrust upon her.
McMorris: Your job depends on you wearing that to the ring tonight, and it also hinges on your ability to protect this.
A small black box is placed in Aurora’s hand. She looks up with a slight grin on her face, realizing how much power has literally been placed in her hand.
Aurora: Hold on, your actually trusting ME with your wedding ring? Just how batshit crazy are you?
Krissie: I know my ring is in safe hands, Rose, because you realize what will happen to your career should something happen to it. Now I’ll see you at the wedding, put some ice on that ankle would ya?
Krissie swaggers away confidently in her wedding dress, leaving Aurora behind as the Punk Rock Princess shakes her head. She scans the small box that was entrusted to her, a sly smile coming to her face.
Rose: Oh, I’ll be there tonight, and I’ll make sure the wedding goes off without a hitch.
Her words are less than reassuring.
DESOLATION & LADDER
VS
TOO MAGNIFICENT & TRASH CAN
“Animal I’ve Become” commences over the PA system, resulting in pure animosity from the rising crowd. Through the curtains emerges the tall, menacing figure that is Too Magnificent, a trashcan present in his hand. His intense features glance back and forth, staring only for a moment at the egg on the stage to his side. Although perplexed by its presence he refuses to be distracted, almost immediately starting down the ramp.
Comeau: Even more tag team action on tap here tonight, as, and I wished I was kidding here, Too Magnificent is about to team up with a trashcan to face Desolation and IWC Cartel Champion Ladder. All this match is missing is Judy Bagwell on a pole.
Susie: This is the match I’ve most been looking forward to. How do I look Mark, I’ve got to be presentable for Ladder.
Mark: I’m sure you look find even though I can’t stand to look at you. Too Magnificent is out for a little bit of payback after being attacked when the lights went out by Ladder on the last Riot!
The Golden Goliath steps over the ropes into the ring, stepping to the center and putting down the trashcan. Oddly he begins to discuss his pre-match strategy with the inanimate aluminum object that seems to be wearing mascara. A spiked black leather vest is wrapped around it as well.
Comeau: Oh come on, don’t tell me Trashcan is an emo.
Moore: Trashcan looks so dark and brooding, it must have had a very troublesome life. I wonder if it was abused when it was just a little coffee can.
Too Mag continues to instruct his partner pretending that it’s actually listening. The arena lights dim and the opening chords of the Rolling Stones' "Paint it Black" echo throughout the arena. Red lights flash and mist appears on the Jumbotron. The harsh, synthetic guitars of "Fever Dream" kick in.
The Jumbotron show a pair of black jackboots marching in time with the beat. In the faded mist past atrocities committed by the Dark Man, Desolation can be seen.
A red serpent's eye pulses with a red glow in the background, the glaring, sinister smiling face of Desolation appearing in the center.
Red lights flash on and off in time with the tune, and a column of red flame explodes in the center of the entry ramp,, revealing the Dark Man in the entryway.
Desolation is not coming alone, as he too brings his back up in the form of not only Ladder, who is gently tucked under his arm, but his former rival Axl Evermore. Both men step out onto the stage and pause as their eyes shift towards the giant egg. Evermore taps Desolation on his shoulder, repeatedly motioning towards the egg as if asking him if he has something to do with it. The co-Cartel Champion says nothing while moving in the direction of the ring where his opponents are waiting. The Cartel title glistens as it hangs around one of Ladder’s rungs, being given the star treatment by having Desolation carry it to the squared circle.
As they reach the ring Ladder is slid under the ropes with Desolation entering himself. He sets up his partner in a standing position then shoots an intimidating stare towards his opposition, Too Magnificent rubbing Trashcan’s handles in an attempt to get psyched up. Neither the aluminum can or Too Mag allow themselves to be frightened by Desolation’s gaze.
Moore: There it is Mark, there it is! It’s Ladder! And it looks like it’s recovered from the career jepordizing injuries caused at the hands of Too Magnificent. Get em Ladder, get em good!
Comeau: As you can tell by Susie’s insane gushing, Desolation and Ladder are present in the ring for this tag team encounter. Interestingly Axl Evermore has accompanied them out here as well. It looks like the three have finally buried the hatchet with one another.
Susie: They shouldn’t be playing with hatchets in the first place, especially not around Ladder.
Too Magnificent takes several bold steps towards Desolation who puts up his fists, ready for a fight. Evermore is standing on the apron behind the Dark Man, pointing at the Golden Goliath then patting the taped up rungs of Ladder reassuringly. Finally he shouts some encouraging words to Desolation and drops from the apron, preparing to see some true violence ensue.
Desolation turns towards Ladder, lifting his fist into the air and playing rock, paper, scissors to decide which one of them are going to start this encounter. His hand lands on scissors before he looks up at Ladder and immediately becomes disappointed.
The defeated Dark Man rolls his eyes then begrudgingly approaches his corner, apparently having been beaten in rock, paper, scissors by his partner. Too Magnificent pats Trashcan on it’s aluminum side before vacating the ring as well. Referee Fitzpatrick steps up to Ladder, frisking it and searching it for weapons to laughter from the crowd, then does the same to Trashcan before finally calling for the bell.
Comeau: Can you believe that we’re about to see Cartel Champion Ladder versus an emo Trashcan?
Moore: It’s like a wet dream turned reality.
Ladder and Trashcan face each other with the bell chiming, yet neither object budges from its spot. Desolation is shouting at the Cartel Champion, demanding it hop in there and get its rungs on Trashcan’s handles. At the same time Too Magnificent is making identical demands to his partner, yet both objects remain rooted to the canvas.
Moore: Ah, Trashcan and Ladder playing a nice game of psychology here, waiting to see who’s going to jump first.
Comeau: They seem to be playing the waiting game. If this goes on much longer, Trashcan will have time to smoke a cigarette and write some really depressing poetry.
A sign finally emanates from both Too Magnificent Desolation who reach over the ropes and tag their respective partners. Desolation slips through the ropes, looking towards Evermore on the outside of the ring as he mumbles something.
Desolation: It’s just got some pre-match jitters.
Axl nods before pointing with urgency at Desolation’s opponent, warning him. The Dark Man turns as the emo Trashcan is thrown directly into his face. It bounces off of his skull, knocking him backwards into the turnbuckle while Too Magnificent picks up his partner, smiling widely.
Too Magnificent: Now that’s what you call teamwork.
The Golden Goliath places his partner in their corner then turns, barreling across the ring in the direction of a dazed Desolation.
Moore: Brilliant teamwork by Trashcan and Too Magnificent. They work better together than the Killer Bees.
Comeau: I wouldn’t go that far.
The inbound Too Magnificent finds himself shocked as he’s met under the jaw with a boot from the Dark Man. The shot causes Too Mag to turn away from his opponent, staggering towards the center of the ring. That’s when Desolation grabs his own tag team partner, draping Ladder over his shoulder then charging right at the incoherent Too Mag. The big man turns around when the top edge of Ladder connects hard right under his jaw. The shot sends the giant tumbling hard to the canvas.
Desolation quickly drops Ladder on top of him then jumps high into the air, coming down back first into the rungs of his partner. The back first senton splash rams Ladder into Too Mag’s torso. He rolls off of him holding his spine then shouting at Too Mag who is still pinned under Ladder.
Desolation: No, that what’s you call teamwork!
He grips at his spine while pushing his partner off of Too Magnificent, referee Fitzpatrick still doing a count on the verge of disqualifying Ladder for not getting out of the ring. He finally pushes Ladder himself under the ropes and onto the apron while Desolation stomps at Too Magnificent then jumps high into the air, coming down knee first directly into his face. Magnificent sits up, grabbing at his nose when Desolation rushes up behind him, delivering a vicious buzzsaw kick right into his kidney area.
The strike causes the big man to roll to his knees, starting to get up while Desolation blasts him to the jaw with forearm after forearm. He approaches Ladder, reaching over the ropes and slapping one of its rungs. He now lifts it into the air, placing it across his sternum then rushing at the rising Too Magnificent. The Golden Goliath delivers a powerful big boot right into the rungs, causing Ladder to be driven hard into Desolation’s sternum, taking him down with force into the canvas.
Comeau: A brutal big boot…
Moore: Two competitors taken out with one boot. That must be one wide boot.
Axl cringes slightly on the outside of the ring as Desolation drapes his arms over his sternum, rolling away from the laid out Ladder. Too Magnificent glares down at Ladder, realizing it’s now the legal competitor in this match. He snatches it up off of the canvas, wrapping his arm through one of the rungs then lifting the Cartel Champion into the air. Too Magnificent holds Ladder upside down for several prolonged moments as the fans start to count. Desolation suddenly clips the back of his knee, knocking him over backwards with Ladder landing across his chest. The official drops down making the count.
1
2
At the last second Too Mag presses Ladder off of him, sending it flying across the ring. He sits up with wide eyes, shocked by that nearfall attempt. He rolls to his feet as referee Fitzpatrick demands that the Dark Man vacate the ring or else he be disqualified. Desolation begrudgingly steps through the ropes, leaving Ladder at the mercy of Too Mag.
Mark: Now Too Magnificent has Ladder exactly where he wants it, at his mercy.
Moore: Well Too Mag’s gonna learn just how tough Ladder is.
Too Magnificent pulls Ladder off of the canvas then throws it hard into the turnbuckle, which it hits directly with it’s rungs. The big man scrapes his feet against the canvas then comes barreling forward, throwing all of his weight with a big splash right into Ladder, engulfing it via his fat. Unfortunately it seems to have inflicted more damage on his own body, stepping back and gripping his ribs in anguish as Ladder slowly tumbles forward out of the corner. Too Mag reaches out and catches one of its rungs, stepping back to the center of the ring then chokeslamming Ladder violently into the canvas.
Susie: Oh no, a chokeslam on Ladder, it must have an inner rung infection or something.
Comeau: Too Magnificent absolutely decimating the Cartel Champion at this point.
Instead of going for the pin, Too Mag steps towards his corner where he slaps Trashcan, tagging it into this match. He approaches the laid out Ladder and places Trashcan on top of it for the pin before vacating the ring.
1
2
Desolation enters the ring and stomps Trashcan, knocking it off of Ladder. He now grabs the struts of his partner, dragging it to his corner. He slips through the ropes then reaches over them, tagging Ladder’s rungs. He re-enters the ring and approaches the emo Trashcan, setting it up straight then trying to clamp on a dragon sleeper. Sadly Desolation’s arm can’t fit all the way around it, therefore he steps back and kicks the can right to it’s back. Trashcan flies across the ring and slams right into Too Mag’s face as he stands in the corner. The impact causes the Golden Goliath to tumble to the outside mats, grabbing at his face in pain.
Official Fitzpatrick points out that Trashcan’s impact with Too Magnificent constitutes a legal tag. Therefore Desolation rushes across the ring and jumps through the ropes with a dropkick that connects to the back of his dazed opponent. Too Magnificent is launched forward into the announce table, bouncing off of it sternum first.
Moore: Too Magnificent almost going face first into my chest.
Comeau: I’m sure many, many men have been there before.
Desolation stands up on the apron as Too Magnificent turns around. Just as he spins to face his opponent, Desolation flies off the apron into a clothesline right across his throat. Both men tumble to the mats with Evermore nodding his head in support for the Dark Man.
After connecting with the lariat, Desolation drags Too Magnificent to his feet then rolls him into the ring under the cables. He pulls himself up onto the apron then begins to scale the turnbuckle, getting to the very top rope. He anxiously waits for Too Magnificent to get to his feet, the golden goliath looking quite stunned by the physicality in this contest thus far. He slowly turns towards Desolation who takes flight with a double axehandle only to be caught around the waist. The giant drops back into a release overhead belly to belly suplex, sending Desolation crashing hard into the canvas.
Comeau: Very nice counter by Too Magnificent, catching Desolation then throwing him over his head with ease.
Moore: My parents use to throw me in the air too, until my head kept hitting the ceiling fan. It’s why I have an artificial scalp.
Too Magnificent rises to his feet shaking off the effects of that lariat on the outside then shoves the official aside so that he can grab his tag team partner. The aluminum emo is hoisted into the air, Too Mag stepping towards the rising Desolation then slamming the can directly between his eyes. The impact echoes throughout the arena, leaving Desolation in a very dazed, incoherent state before Too Magnificent swings the can directly into his skull yet again. This impact finally takes Desolation off of his feet and down to the canvas.
An enraged Too Mag now places the can on Desolation’s chest then drapes himself over it, leaning down into a double cover. The official forces himself to make the count.
1
2
Desolation impressively kicks out from beneath both Trashcan and Too Mag.
Moore: Wow, Desolatiotn must be Hercules, or one of those other Greek Gods in scantily togas. Uhh, I suddenly need to go to the bathroom.
Comeau: Disgusting, and save it for after the show.
Too Mag looks strangely remorseful as he looks at the dented up surface of Trashcan, its mascara now running and its vest tattered.
Too Magnificent: I hope you don’t have an HMO.
The dazed Dark Man rolls away from his opponent in the direction of the Cartel Champion, looking to make the hot tag to Ladder, who would then presumably come in and clean house. Too Magnificent throws Trashcan down into his back, keeping him from going any further.
Mark: Desolation was going for the tag but Trashcan cut him off.
Too Magnificent steps towards Desolation taking him around the jaw, then slowly leading him up to his feet. He now drags him head first into his armpit, trapping him in a front chancery as he sets up for the Midas Touch. Just before he can connect Desolation twists his body, wedging his shoulders to Too Mag’s gut and showing his tremendous strength by hoisting him into the air onto his shoulders. Desolation turns and delivers a Death Valley Driver that plants Too Magnificent right on top of Trashcan. The hard aluminum surface is flattened under Too Mag’s body as Desolation staggers towards his partner, making the tag through the ropes to Ladder.
Susie: Oh no, I think Too Magnificent may have done some serious internal injuries to his partner!
Mark: This is exactly the move that Desolation needed. He took two opponents out at the same time.
Ladder is now slid into the ring as Desolation intends to employ it for some tag team maneuvers. He drags Ladder to the center of the ring, setting it up then scaling it’s taped up rungs. Too Magnificent is still laid out on top of Trashcan as Desolation climbs closer and closer to the top of Ladder, before he stands on its upper most rung.
Moore: Where’s Desolation trying to go, heaven?
Comeau: He’s using his tag team partner to elevate himself as high as he can go, we don’t see this very often from the Dark Man.
Desolation sticks his arms out to his sides and unleashes a primal roar before taking flight from the top of Ladder, flipping through the air with a shooting star press that connects right across Too Magnificent’s sternum. Trashcan is further flattened beneath them as Desolation hooks his opponent’s leg for the pin. The crowd is surprisingly going nuts over what they just witnessed.
1
2
3
The Manhattan Center is rocking as Desolation has just defeated Too Magnificent, flattening both his opponents in one fatal swoop.
Comeau: Desolation with an assist from his tag team partner Ladder have done it!
Moore: Yay, Ladder has carried Desolation to another victory.
The fans are still celebrating while Too Magnificent rolls to the outside of the ring, spilling to the mats and reaching for his spine in horrible pain. All the while Desolation tries to regain his faculties, trying to will himself upwards.
A BAD EGG
Axl slides into the ring, standing in the corner and clapping for Desolation, showing a surprising amount of respect. His ribs might be enflamed with pain yet Desolation is still slowly rising to his feet, doubled over and gripping at his mid-section. Evermore slips something out of his pocket and approaches him, now holding a microphone.
Comeau: Apparently Desolation isn’t satisfied, because he’s got something on his mind.
Moore: But he doesn’t have anymore title belts to give away.
Although still aching slightly Desolation takes the microphone and lifts it to his lips.
Desolation: Unlike my oafish partner earlier in the night I will not be generically interrupted until I’ve made my special announcement.
Some boos and some cheers commence from the crowd.
Desolation: By Cthulhu’s clawed hand I make this decree…next week a comeback shall take place that will effectively shake this company from it’s apathetic monotony. Much like Herbert West I will reanimate a career that was long thought dead, and leave the uneducated townsfolk to suffer the repercussions.
Upon making this comment he points out over the crowd who respond with a mixed reaction.
Desolation: But HEY, why wait until next week since I know many of the so called “wrestlers” in the back have extremely limited attention spans? Instead of wetting everyone’s appetites with a cliché cliffhanger, I figured I’d have another legendary star return here tonight to properly prepare you for next week. Hence the presence of the egg.
The Dark Man forgets his internal injuries by thrusting his open palm out towards the egg on the stage.
Desolation: It’s time to crack the egg and find out what’s inside. Of course anyone with even a limited knowledge of wrestling would be aware of the blasphemy I’m prepared to torment both the fans and management alike with. And at the very least I didn’t give it weeks of build up only to have the most unsatisfying payoff in wrestling history. Oh wait, that accolade goes to Cruze winning the World title. So without further ado and anymore forced Lovecraft quotes, OPEN THE EGG!
All attention shifts to the giant egg on the stage with the crowd smiling as they realize what’s about to pop out.
Comeau: I think I know what’s inside of there, even though I really don’t want to.
Moore: Is it Big Bird? I hope it’s Big Bird, or at the very least the Cookie Monster.
Anticipation builds as the egg begins to crack. A hairline fracture has formed in the center of the shell, as it slowly shatters. Finally the egg bursts open and the Gobbledy Gooker pops out from the center, dressed head to toe in full turkey ensemble. He is met with an overwhelming wave of apathy from the crowd as some ludicrous tunes bombard the PA system. The Goobledy Gooker begins to dance and shuffle its way to the ring, swinging its hips and its wings.
Moore: It’s A GIANT TURKEY, and it’s not even my birthday.
Comeau: And yet again the IWC is disgraced with further association to wrestling’s worst moments as the Gobbledy Gooker makes his way to the ring. Please, PLEASE, don’t start dancing with Desolation.
The Gobbledy Gooker rolls into the ring where Axl and Desolation are standing with big grins on their faces. As the music continues to play the giant turkey rushes into one set of cables, then the other. He bounces off into a forward roll, then a backwards roll ending up on his feet yet again before rushing towards Desolation. The Dark Man shrugs his shoulders as he and the Goobledy Gooker interlock arms, beginning to dance their way in circles.
Mark: Well, at the very least Desolation is lighter on his feet than Mean Gene.
Moore: The giant turkey is dancing with Desolation! This is so much fun! Should I get in there and dance too?
Comeau: No, no, good God no.
Desolation and the Gobbledy Gooker continue to do arm in arm dances before the turkey breaks away and moves towards Evermore. Axl smirks and takes arms with the Gobbledy Gooker, the two dancing in circles themselves now to a rousing response from a small percentage of the fans.
Mark: Well, Desolation was right when he said he was going to stick it to the fans and management with this whole debacle.
Moore: I hope this goes all night long, this is the greatest moment ever!
Gobbledy Gooker breaks away from Evermore then moves towards Ladder, wrapping his arm around it and dragging it around in circles, dancing with the inanimate object as well. Laughter comes from the crowd at the sight of this as Desolation turns his back to the whole scene, pompously smirking over this torturous affair. With the music blaring the Gobbledy Gooker stops dancing, bending forward from exhaustion but then reaching up and removing its turkey head. The crowd goes nuts at the sight of Johnny Kingdom inside of the costume.
Comeau: UH OH.
Moore: GOOD GOD, the turkey decapitated itself!
Kingdom stands up straight behind both Desolation and Evermore, a disturbing smile coming to his face as he now places Ladder on top of his shoulder. Finally the Dark Man spins around to do some more arm in arm dances when Kingdom rushes forward, driving the top edge of Ladder right into Desolation’s nose. The collision echoes throughout the arena as Desolation tumbles to his back, rolling across the ring and under the ropes, blood gushing from his nostrils.
Comeau: Kingdom just laid out Desolation with the ladder! This was a set up.
Moore: I can’t believe Kingdom is really the Gobbledy Gooker.
Johnny turns towards Axl who rolls out of harms way, dropping to the outside mats and backing from the ring. He shakes his head, sorely disappointed in Kingdom’s behavior tonight. Desolation leans on the barricade, whipping blood from his nose while security rushes out, forming a wall between himself and the ring so this violence cannot escalate. The crowd is still screaming and chanting Kingdom’s name as he removes the Gobbledy Gooker costume, throwing it down to the ring then picking the microphone up off of the canvas. The Team Leader looks more irate than ever before.
Kingdom: DESOLATION!
The Dark Man finally regains his senses long enough to look up spitefully into the ring, security still holding him at bay.
Johnny: If you thought there wouldn’t be repercussions for your actions last week I just proved you wrong, DEAD WRONG!
As the blood is swiped from Desolation’s nose he smiles, licking the claret from his lips. Kingdom storms back and forth in the ring, kicking the costume he was forced to wear off of the canvas.
Kingdom: But we aren’t even close to being even, Dark Man! This is only the beginning, because everywhere you go, every place you visit, I could be laying in wait to pick up where we left off TONIGHT.
Desolation nods and continues to smile as the blood dribbles down over his lips. His eyes fill with dementia and pleasure at the thought of his issues with Kingdom only escalating from this point onward. Evermore on the other hand has jumped to the apron, turning back and forth between both men, trying to talk some sense into them. However, the vengeful Kingdom points out the voice of reason while Desolation is gently lead towards the back by security.
Johnny: And don’t think I’ve forgotten about you Desolation-lite. I know what part you played in last week’s little game so you’re not getting off the hook. No, your getting in this ring.
Axl points to himself, as if he’s questioning rather Kingdom is actually talking about him. He shakes his head with a slight smirk, insisting he had no part in the attack last week during the World title match. Kingdom doesn’t listen as he picks up Ladder, pitching it over the ropes to the outside then turns with a huff towards the former Cartel Champion.
Kingdom: Why wait any longer? Let’s do this, and let’s do it RIGHT NOW!
Kingdom points to the ring then tosses away with the microphone. The fans are screaming while Axl gives Kingdom an awkward stare before finally grinning.
Evermore: Sure. If that’s the only way to put some sense in you, then so be it.
Evermore slips into the ring while Kingdom backs into an opposite corner, both men waiting for the referee to slide in and start the match. All the while Desolation shockingly allows himself to be backed up the ramp towards the curtains. His eyes are focused maliciously on the ring while he grins disturbingly.
COMMERCIAL BREAK
IWC….At least there aren’t any slow motion shining wizards
AXL EVERMORE VS. JOHNNY KINGDOM
The show comes back live to the inside of the ring as Evermore jogs to a corner, climbs it and thrusts his arms up and points to himself again, shouting "A...X...L!" as the crowd chants along. He hops down from the corner then takes his bandanna off and throws it into the audience. Axl then turns towards Kingdom who is being restrained by the official.
Susie: Oh, why doesn’t Axl ever throw me his bandanna? I like cute head gear, it covers my huge ears.
Comeau: Yes, your ears may be abnormally large to offset your freakishly tiny brain. Welcome back to Riot! ladies and gentlemen, and as you can see we’re ready for Axl Evermore versus Johnny Kingdom. The Team Leader made the challenge right before the break and thus far Axl has been trying to lighten things up during the commercial break.
Moore: I still can’t believe Kingdom and the Gobbledy Gooker have been the same person this entire time. It’s mind blowing.
Despite his knowledge of Kingdom’s anger, Evermore steps forward with a friendly extension of his hand. His fingers twiddle as Kingdom leaves him hanging, stepping up right into Axl’s face so that they are nose to nose. The Team Leader is burning with hatred after all that has gone down this month while Evermore grins and puts his palms up.
Axl: If your gonna get up in my face make sure you at least brush your teeth first, Champ.
Surprisingly a grin settles over Kingdom’s face before he tilts his head and throws a right hand that connects with Evermore’s chin. The stiff shot sends Axl spiraling backwards in the direction of the cables before he’s chopped with tremendous force across the sternum. Evermore falls spine first against the cables, propping himself up while an irrationally intense Kingdom boots him to the ribs and now begins to rifle off right hand after right hand across his sternum.
Comeau: Johnny getting this match started in an aggressive way.
Moore: He’s all bent out of shape, just like a pretzel. Great, now I’m hungry, thanks Kingdom!
Mark: We saw Johnny implode and attack Desolation before this match, busting his nose, and it looks like he’s trying to do the same to Evermore.
Each blow connects with tremendous force as Kingdom is almost rabid, transferring all his aggression for Desolation onto Evermore. His wrist is snatched as Axl is pulled forward into a fist shot that he avoids by dropping into a baseball slide through the legs of Kingdom. The Fully Loaded rep jumps to his feet then lunges into the air, dropkicking Kingdom right between the shoulder blades and sending him charging into the ropes. Johnny slips through the cables and falls to his feet on the outside mats while Evermore quickly gets to his feet.
A surprisingly angered Kingdom starts back towards the ring when Evermore bolts across it then dives through the cables. Both of his feet connect straight with Johnny’s sternum via a modified front dropkick, knocking him back hard into our announce table.
Susie: SEE, this is why I’ve been lobbying the IWC to build a protective force-field for our announce table.
Comeau: Yeah, I’m sure they’ll get right on that.
Evermore is seated on the second rope after the dropkick, still holding the top cable which he now flips over with a version of the skin of the cat. He lands back in the ring, still gripping the upper most cable then pulling himself over into a crossbody, crashing down right on top of Kingdom’s sternum. Both men crash into the outside mats forcefully, Axl rolling off of his laid out opponent then getting to his knees on top of the announce table. Once there he motions towards himself with both thumbs, the crowd chanting “A-X-L.”
Comeau: Axl right on top of our table.
Moore: Ew, quick, QUICK, give me a dollar.
Mark: He’s not stripping. I hope, he’s like two inches away from my face.
A shocked Kingdom is slowly trying to get up as Axl takes him around the jaw, slowly leading him to his feet.
Axl: Are you ready to listen to reason yet?
Johnny throws a right hand directly into Axl’s ribs, doubling him over. After this strike Evermore launches himself forward into a forearm to Kingdom’s jaw, almost knocking him down to the mats. He takes him by the ears, dragging him up to his feet then rolling him into the ring under the cables. A stunned Kingdom rolls towards the center of the ring, Axl sliding in and going after him. He grabs both of Johnny’s legs, lifting them into the air and perhaps setting up for some type of submission.
Axl I got to beat some sense into you.
Kingdom shoves Evermore off with his feet, sending him tumbling to the ring then rolling backwards to a kneeling base. He charges forward and grabs the legs, lifting them up again as he tries to lock in a submission. Johnny reaches up taking his forarm and pulling him down into a modified arm drag of sorts. Axl flips over top of the Team Leader, landing on his back while Johnny rolls in reverse towards him. He ends up straddling Evermore’s chest, beginning to slug him viciously and without remorse right between the eyes.
Mark: Johnny has mounted Axl and…..
Susie: Hehehehe…
Comeau: Oh grow up.
The Team Leader continues to unload on Axl through jab after jab, leaving him completely disorientated. He stands up and lunges high into the air, stomping down forcefully against Axl’s forehead, leaving a knot. Evermore sits up grabbing at his cranium and starting to stand when Kingdom drills him hard under the jaw with an uppercut. He is sent reeling away from Kingdom who then spins around and almost beheads him via the roaring elbow. The strike knocks Axl down hard to the canvas, Johnny dropping down beside him and beginning to slug him repeatedly to the skull.
Comeau: I have not seen Kingdom this aggressive in a long time, and he’s not even facing the actual culprit behind last week’s attack.
Susie: Who, Spongebob?
Mark: Yeah, sure, Kingdom was attacked by Spongebob.
Moore: You can’t trust anyone nowadays.
Referee Wright admonishes Kingdom until he stops these blatant closed fist shots. He rises to his feet as Evermore rolls away from him in the direction of the cables. He grabs the ropes, pulling himself up to his knees when Kingdom steps beside him, delivering a knee to the side of his face, then another, then another. Each knee is inflicting significant damage before Johnny eventually pulls Evermore to his feet then chops him with enough upward force to knock him over the ropes. Evermore twists around crashing to his seat across the apron, Kingdom stepping out in front of him. He takes hold of Axl’s hair leading him up to his feet and locking him in a front chancery.
Kingdom: Your going to confess or your going to get Exodus Finaled right on this apron!
The crowd is screaming as Kingdom lifts Axl into the air for the brainbuster DDT onto the apron.
Comeau: Oh God no!
Axl twists his body in mid-air though, floating over the ropes and landing feet first back inside of the ring. Johnny’s back is turned towards him as Evermore aches over the cables, grabbing his opponent around the cranium and dropping with a reverse neckbreaker. The back of Kingdom’s head snaps off of the apron, causing him to fall to his knees in a very groggy state.
Mark: Very impressive counter by Evermore, keeping himself from being hit with that deadly Exodus Finale.
Susie: He snapped Johnny’s neck right off those ropes, it could have been broken like a….a….a snapple!
Comeau: Yeah, that made about as much sense as you having this job in the first place.
Despite being snapped off the ropes, Kingdom begins to stand up on the apron, Axl slipping through the ropes behind him. Evermore wraps his arm around Johnny’s neck and drops into a reverse DDT, planting the back of Kingdom’s head disgustingly against the apron.
Mark: AHHH.
The impact causes Kingdom to sit up, looking glassy eyed and very confused. Evermore rolls into the ring and grabs the top rope, pulling himself over while twisting his body into a front dropkick that connects right against Kingdom’s face. The blow renders Kingdom unconscious as he now rolls under the ropes back into the ring, Evermore standing up on the apron. He grabs the top rope and pulls himself over into a senton splash that connects right across Kingdom’s ribs, causing him to curl into a fetal position. Axl crawls quickly into the cover.
1
2
Johnny lifts his foot into the air placing it over the middle rope. Upon spotting this Official Wright stops the count, prompting Evermore to become even more aggressive himself. He gets to his knees and begins to drive the point of his elbow down into the bridge of Kingdom’s nose. He now scrapes his forearm across the eyes of the Team Leader much to the referee’s protest.
Comeau: Both these guys inflicting some serious damage on each other and really laying on the aggression.
Moore: They should hold hands and play drums and wear kilts, bond in manly yet homoerotic ways.
Mark: What the fuck are you talking about?
Axl finally leads Kingdom up to his seat pushing him backwards into the corner, he wedges him spine first against it to make sure he remains upright. Axl now steps backwards across the ring, moving to the very center of it then barreling forward and diving right at the seated Kingdom, throwing all of his weight directly into him with a back first splash. The impact is devastating, leaving Kingdom in a very groggy state as Axl grabs him by the ankle and drags him out of the corner, dropping down into the pin.
1
2
At the last second Johnny launches his shoulder free from the ring. He narrowly avoids defeat leading Axl to pull him up to his knees then to his feet, where he scoops him up for a suplex into the stunner. As soon as he gets him up into the air though, Kingdom drives his knee down into the top of Evermore’s head. The strike causes Axl to drop Johnny back to his feet in front of him, a wobbling Kingdom booting Axl right to the side of the face. The shot causes Evermore to go into a spin, turning away from the Team Leader who rushes forward right into a corkscrew buzzsaw kick from the athletic Axl. The stiff impact of shin against skull sends Kingdom down hard to the ring, Evermore crawling into the cover yet again.
1
Shockingly Johnny is able to get his shoulder up at one.
Comeau: Big kick by Evermore.
Moore: Jamacian me craz…
Mark: No, don’t, I swear to God if you finish that sentence I’ll quit.
Susie: Good, because I don’t remember how the rest of it goes anyway.
Kingdom is completely laid out while Axl pushes him over onto his stomach and now locks both his arms around his neck. He has him placed in a modified cobra clutch now leaning back and pulling in reverse on the arms. Kingdom remains stretched across his stomach while Axl leans back at his side, really ripping at his body via the Aoki Hikari, otherwise known as the Cobra stretch. Johnny refuses to submit while Axl shouts at him.
Axl: Will you listen now you paranoid son of a bitch? I had nothing to do with….
Johnny extends one of his feet and places it over the bottom rope, having been just close enough to the cables to reach them. The referee cuts Axl off in mid-sentence by informing him that Johnny is in the ropes, forcing Axl to break the hold. He rolls to his knees and takes Johnny around the neck, leading him up to a standing base then calling out for the Shotgun. Axl lifts Kingdom up into the air for the move when Johnny floats over his shoulder this time and completely avoids the stunner. The quick Kingdom lands behind Axl and grabs his wrist, pulling it between his legs while hooking the other arm. Axl is now hoisted into the air with a pumphandle before being transitioned into a sit-out powerbomb.
Mark: Ohh, Dark City Driver by Kingdom, perhaps giving him the opportunity he needs to get back into this match if not the victory.
Susie: That was wackier than the Animaniacs.
Kingdom lies on his back after hitting the powerbomb, his chest heaving with exhaustion, unable to make the cover.
Comeau: Johnny just doesn’t have enough remaining in the tank to make the pin.
Susie: He has a tank, is it filled with oil, or CANDY?
In exhaustion the Team Leader slowly begins to stand, Axl trying to do the same, his hand pressed to his bruised kidneys. Both men reach their feet when Axl steps in, throwing a right hand that connects hard against Kingdom’s jaw. Johnny responds via a devastating right hand of his own that rocks Evermore’s cheek. Axl steps back in and delivers a knee right to the ribs of the Team Leader, bending him forward as he’s taken by the wrist. A ferocious Evermore whips Kingdom into the ropes which he bounces off, ricocheting back into Axl’s direction.
Evermore steps forward and catches his inbound opponent with a tilt a whirl only for him to spin out of it and catch Axl around the arm, dragging him down into the crossface counter. A huge reaction is heard from the fans at the sight of this, Kingdom locking Evermore in the submission, pulling back on his head with both arms.
Kingdom: Confess, CONFESS!
Axl is roaring in pain as his head is pulled as far back as it can possibly go before his neck shatters.
Comeau: Crossface by Kingdom now locked in after a stunning counter.
Moore: Hang in there Axl, just like that adorable kitten in that inspirational poster.
Johnny continues to rip and tear at the neck of the former Cartel Champion who digs his claws into the canvas, sluggishly pulling himself towards the ropes. His twiddling fingers reach out and grab hold of the bottom rope to cheers from the crowd, Johnny rolling away from him to his feet. With sweat trickling down his frame he extends both of his arms out to his sides, flicking his fingers as he anticipates Evermore getting back to his feet.
Susie: Johnny doing the finger spirit dance.
Comeau: Nooooo, he’s setting up for the Exodus Finale.
A tired Evermore drags himself up the ropes and slowly twirls towards Kingdom who boots him to the gut, stepping in to take him around the neck and lock him in position for the Exodus Finale. Axl is able to slip under Kingdom’s arm, placing his back to Johnny’s then dragging him down into the back slide.
1
Kingdom rolls in reverse onto his feet and steps forward for the punt kick to Axl’s face to set up for the brainbuster DDT. Axl catches his foot before it can connect with his face however, standing up when Johnny lunges into the air and blasts him to the back of the head with a powerful enzugari. Evermore is sent flipping forward to the canvas while Kingdom lands on his elbows and knees, slowly trying to get up. He is somewhat winded as he slips through the ropes and onto the apron, stepping across it towards the turnbuckle.
Mark: Johnny going high risk.
The crowd is buzzing as Kingdom gets to the top rope preparing for the 450 splash, only to have Axl get to his feet and then jump into the air. He delivers a pumpkick right to the side of Kingdom’s head, getting tremendous height on the maneuver. The lethal kick leaves Johnny in a terribly incoherent condition, wavering back and forth on the turnbuckle in his seated position, unable to deliver the 450 splash.
The athletic Axl falls back to his feet on the canvas and now throws an uppercut right hand directly into Kingdom’s jaw, continuing to inflict disorientate him. He now begins to step up onto the corner, getting to the second rope then hooking both of Kingdom’s arms, looking out over the crowd with a twisted grin on his face.
Comeau: Uh oh….
Susie: Axl’s transformed into the JOKER!
Mark: Yeah, whatever, actually my fear is derived from Axl’s impending Flipside off the turnbuckle.
Every fan is standing and screaming as Axl prepares to deliver one of his most devastating moves all the way off the top rope, the double underhook brainbuster. He lifts up on Kingdom only to have Johnny wrap his legs around the top rope, refusing to be taken down. Axl tugs again but can’t lift Johnny into the air, forcing him to bite his lip and try to hoist him into the air for a third time. Finally Johnny pulls his head free and sinks his teeth into the bridge of Axl’s nose. The blatant cheating is actually met with some cheers from the crowd before Kingdom headbunts Axl hard to the forehead, then does it once again. Evermore’s legs are wobbling beneath him after this vicious headbunt before Kingdom takes him around the neck, beginning to stand up on the top rope.
Comeau: Hold on, this doesn’t look good.
Susie: Yes, Axl’s backside isn’t too pleasant to look at from this vantage point.
Axl is lifted up into the air and held upside down as Kingdom jumps from the top rope, dragging him down head first into the canvas with a super Exodus Finale. The crowd jumps out of their seats in shock as Axl’s head collides violently with the canvas, his body popping up onto his seat while his eyes flicker.
Comeau: OHHH, a super Exodus Finale!
Moore: But Kingdom wasn’t wearing a cape or anything.
A “Holy Shit” chant has commenced from the crowd while Kingdom crawls into the cover.
1
2
3!
A loud ovation is elicited from the sold out crowd as Kingdom has just bested Axl Evermore in this grueling encounter.
Mark: Victory for Kingdom after the Exodus Finale off the very top rope!
Susie: He didn’t get a confession, but he did pick up a win. Te-he.
Johnny sits up gripping at his lower back while Evermore lays spread across the canvas at his side, agonizing from the brutality of the Brainbuster DDT. In an exhaustive state Kingdom rises to his feet and staggers backwards into the ropes, falling against them for support. His eyes are fiercely locked on the unconscious Evermore, never having expected this type of battle tonight.
Comeau: This was quite the unique one on one encounter but it appears to have done little to alleviate Kingdom’s rage.
Moore: He needs to lay off of the roids.
Axl finally begins to raise his head slightly, turning it incoherently towards Kingdom who is spitefully shaking his head.
Kingdom: This is just the beginning.
THE BLUSHING BRIDE
The crowd unloads their disdain at the sight of Krissie McMorris on her way to the ring adorned in her extravagant white wedding dress. The flower girl Becca Cruze leads the way, already throwing flowers down to the concrete at their feet. It’s clear that both ladies are mere moments from stepping through the curtains for one of the most bizarre weddings in IWC history. Comeau’s and Susie’s voices are overheard in the background.
Mark Comeau: The time is here Susie…
Susie Moore: For another colonoscopy?
Comeau: I wish, instead we’re about to witness the wedding between Krissie McMorris and Nathan Creed, and apparently it’s going to be NEXT.
Susie: Stupid commercial breaks.
Krissie and Becca walk right past the camera, which turns to watch them, Sallie suspicious by her absence on this ever so special evening.
COMMERCIAL BREAK
Coming Soon to DVD
TYING THE KNOT
Much to the disgust of all those amassed in the Manhattan Center the camera brings us to a live feed of a lavishly decorated ring. The ropes have white silk hanging from them, matching the ivory alter that is located in the center of the squared circle. Standing on top of this alter just beneath a fancy archway is surprisingly Max Craven, dressed in robes and holding an unorthodox looking bible. He wears a pleasant smile although he clearly doesn’t want to be here.
Comeau: I’m obligated to say this, but please keep your hands off the remote, because the wedding of Krissie McMorris and Nathan Creed is about to take place. I can honestly not recall a time where we’ve ever had to hold a shotgun wedding, or been forced to use cue cards to describe it.
Moore: I like cue cards, they keep me from messing up. Now if only I learned how to read.
Standing just off to the side of the alter is a sweaty David Freak, still exhausted from his earlier encounter. Despite being drained he still stuffed his overheated body into a tux that looks a little too cramped to accommodate his proportions. His eyes are glaring menacingly at Aurora Rose who is less concerned with the man she abandoned earlier, and more outraged by the horribly cheesy lime green dress she was forced to wear.
David mumbles some obscenities while pointing towards Aurora’s knee that was suppose to be injured earlier. All she does is shrug her shoulders in response. In the corner of the ring, where a giant cheese platter is placed, Jean Lafette and Bob are fighting over the tasty dairy treats. A band now starts up on the stage.
Comeau: As you can see we have several special guests for this wedding. Max Craven is serving as priest since I guess he’s the leader of the Church of Hot Addiction. Then you have Aurora Rose performing as Maid of Honor and David Freak as the Best Man….
Moore: The only person this wedding is missing is Alf. Alf would make this truly special.
Mark: True, but hold that thought, because is that who I think it is leading the band?
Although his face is slightly hidden behind a giant white powdered wig, one can easily determine that the maestro conducting the band is SCW’s very own James Exeter.
Classical European duds adorn his frame, as a throw back to maestros such as Mozart or Beethoven while he flails a wand out to his side, leading his tiny orchestra without having any idea what he’s doing. Despite his lack of expertise in this field the band, some dressed like members of Devo and others in KISS paint, perform a perfect rendition of “Pomp and Circumstance.”
Comeau: That’s James Exeter, and he isn’t even wearing Mariachi pants.
Moore: Well, Krissie did hire him all those weeks ago for the wedding, and I really like how he did his hair.
Finally one of the agents taps Exeter on his shoulder, leaning in and whispering to him that he’s playing the wrong song.
Exeter: What? This isn’t a high-school graduation!?!
In agitation he rubs the flesh between his eyes.
James: How am I supposed to work under these conditions. Okay, go on, get…
The agent scurries away while Exeter taps his wand on the small podium in front of him and forces the band to change their tune. As soon as the Wedding March commences little Becca Cruze strolls out onto the stage, throwing flowers above her head. She proceeds towards the ring with Krissie McMorris following her out to a very disturbing response from the Manhattan crowd.
Susie: Aww, look at how pretty she is in her dress. Mark, HOLD ME.
Comeau: Quit TOUCHING ME! Besides, I think Krissie is stretching it a little wearing white tonight.
McMorris is dressed in a truly extravagant wedding gown that sparkles with every step she takes towards the ring. Although she may be getting booed out of the building a warm, gentle smile is still present on her face. She makes her way up the steel steps that lead into the ring, still following behind Becca who is pitching flowers into the air. After much delay she makes her way through the ropes, having trouble doing so with her long dress, Craven constantly checking his watch, wondering how much time this is wasting.
Mark: Hmmm, they must be doing one of those reverse theme weddings, because isn’t the groom supposed to come out first? Where is Nathan Creed?
Susie: Ew, I love this game, is he hiding in a crowd of people somewhere? Look for the one in glasses.
Comeau: This is not “Where’s Waldo.”
Krissie seems rather perplexed by the lack of Creed’s presence as she approaches the alter. In confusion she glances up at Craven who is shouting down towards her.
Craven: Where is he?
Although somewhat concerned McMorris shrugs her shoulders and tries to maintain her confidence.
Krissie: I’m sure he’ll come out when they play his entrance music. Creed wouldn’t dare delay his own wedding.
The mere thought causes her to tremble a little with rage. Just as she makes this claim Creed’s entrance music hits the PA system, sending the crowd to their feet as they go absolutely nuts for the Future.
Comeau: Here comes the groom apparently.
Susie: Poor Creed, I remember the last time I forced someone to marry me, my cousin still has forgiven me.
An overjoyed Krissie turns to stare at the curtains hanging in the entry way as do all other eyes in the building except for Freak’s and Aurora’s. David is still pointing at Aurora’s knee, insisting that she isn’t really injured while Rose smiles and implies that she just had a Charlie Horse earlier. Nathan’s music continues to play for several agonizingly unbearable moments yet there is absolutely no sight of the groom.
Moore: Where is he? Did he get locked in the bathroom?
Comeau: I have no clue what is going on here, there is no sight of Nathan Creed whatsoever.
For the first time since she came up with this wedding plot Krissie looks concerned. She stares through the ropes at one of the agents present at ringside, shouting at him to replay Creed’s music from the beginning. The agent shrugs and relays this message through headset to the backstage area. Once again Creed’s music hits the PA system with the crowd not giving as big of a reaction this time. Many of them return to their seats, crossing their arms and wondering where Creed is.
Mark: Still no Nathan.
Moore: I hope he hasn’t jilted her at the alter. This is just like Runaway Bride, only Creed’s lips aren’t as big or terrifying as Julia Roberts’.
Comeau: I certainly can’t blame Creed for this one, thankfully he’s taking a stand against this whole forced marriage even if it could cost him his job.
Krissie’s lower lip is trembling with anger as it finally begins to set in that Creed isn’t coming. Once this disturbing truth dawns on her she turns towards Craven, shouting almost incoherently.
Krissie: You know what, start the wedding!
Max: I don’t think he’s coming.
McMorris: I don’t care, the fans were promised a wedding and their going to get one, so START!
The loud shrill, eardrum popping scream coerces Craven into fulfilling his job duties.
Craven: Um, ladies and gentlemen we are gathered here today to join this “COUPLE” in holy matrimony. Well, actually that’s why you’re all here, I’m just here because I’m a whore for the money, but that’s besides the point. The Church of Hot Addiction would like to take this moment to wish these two the best of luck as they embark on this magical journey, that we pray will be filled with many whips, chains, and safety words…
Some laughter commences from the crowd while Krissie continues to glance over her shoulder towards the curtains. There is still no sign of Nathan Creed.
Max: I understand that special vows have been prepared by both bride and groom but since they would probably bore me I’m opting to skip them and hop right to the end.
She may be angered by this but at the same time Krissie just wants this horror to be over with.
Max: If there is anyone present who has objections to this couple being wed, please step forward and probably be embarrassingly mauled by security now.
The eyes of the fans quickly scan the building, wondering who is going to pop out and put the kibosh on these proceedings. Bob looks up from the cheese platter, melted dairy pouring from the corners of his mouth, anticipating the same as of the fans. Finally it seems that Aurora has had enough of this whole travesty, raising her finger to say something before David steps in, shoving her hard to the chest.
Comeau: It looks like Rose was thankfully going to say something about this, as I don’t think it’s legal to conduct a wedding when there’s no groom present, but David stopping her.
Moore: Aurora should mind her own business, and give me that dress after she’s done with it.
Aurora shoves David back, the two getting almost nose to nose as they appear ready for a fight.
Krissie: STOP THIS, STOP IT! STOP RUINING MY WEDDING!
An enraged Krissie forces herself in between both Freak and Rose, separating the two by a few inches as they stand on the alter at her sides.
McMorris: Things are bad enough without you two fighting.
She turns back towards Craven who is growing increasingly bored.
McMorris: Now get to the end already.
Obviously Craven has no problem with this, holding his hand out towards Krissie and telling her to proceed. A distraught, emotionally crippled McMorris turns towards Aurora.
Krissie: Do you have my ring?
Aurora wants no part in this but is anxious to get rid of the ring she was entrusted with earlier.
Aurora: Yeah, I do.
A strange smirk forms on Krissie’s face as the wedding ring is placed in her palm. She now turns towards Freak.
Krissie: And do you?
Freak rolls his eyes, depositing the ring he was holding for Creed into her other outstretched palm.
David: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I do.
McMorris: GREAT! You heard them Craven, let’s make it official.
The sudden change in Krissie’s behavior leaves both Freak and Rose perplexed, their eyes awkwardly blinking as they turn towards one another. They suddenly realize what they unintentionally stated while standing across from each other on the alter. A smirking Craven quickly wraps things up.
Max: Well why the hell not, I don’t like either one of you. David Freak, Aurora Rose, I now pronounce you man and wife, you may kiss the bride.
A shocked reaction is elicited from everyone in the building, David’s eyes opening so wide they almost burst from his skull. Aurora’s jaw hangs agape as she turns towards a laughing McMorris, who greatly enjoys their suffrage.
Freak: WHAT!?! This can’t be legal.
Aurora: I’m not marrying hi….
Just before she can finish her sentence her rival Craven steps behind her back, shoving Aurora forward into Freak so that their lips accidentally touch. They smooch for half a second before they both jump back, spitting up any fluid that was exchanged between them. Craven rolls under the ropes laughing to himself while McMorris backs towards the cables cackling as well.
Comeau: I don’t believe it, mostly because there’s no way this can be legal, but Krissie McMorris has just tricked Aurora Rose and David Freak, rivals, into marrying each other!
Moore: WHAT A TWIST!
Jean Lafette seems to be choking on cheese cubes as he realizes what just happened while Exeter leads his orchestra in a rendition of the Cantina Band music from Star Wars. In pure disgust both Aurora and David find themselves slowly looking up into each other’s ghost white faces. The second they realize that they’ve been married that ivory white tone becomes as green as Aurora’s dress.
Comeau: I don’t even know how to properly put into words what we just witnessed, but Aurora Rose and David Freak have forcefully been married. Luckily we’ve got some wrestling coming up next as the World title is moments away from being put on the line.
Susie: After a commercial break?
Mark: Yep.
Moore: DAMMIT!
COMMERCIAL BREAK
IWC….At least there’s no Shockmaster
ORLANDO CRUZE © VS. ROBIN BROOKS
Tell me exactly
Rah! Rah!
It doesn't really seem
Rah! Rah!
Is she not right?
You always wanted
Rah! Rah!
Is she not right?
Ramidi ma ma ba di ma!
Is she really telling lies again?
Eeeeeeeyow!
Is she not right?
The little bitch,
what am I supposed to do?
Now that I have
allowed you to beat me!
Do you think that
we could play another game?
Maybe I can win this time?
I kind of like
the misery you put me through.
Darling, you can trust me
completely.
If you even try
to look the other way,
I think that I could kill this time.
Rah! Rah!
I'm getting through to you.
Though I see you weeping so sweetly.
I think that you might
have to take another taste,
a little bit of hell this time.
Lie to me!
Rah! Rah!
Lie to me!
Is she insane?
Will she now run for her life
in the battle that ends this day?
Is she not right?!
Is she insane?!
Will she now run for her life
now that she LIED TO ME!
people to remember you.
You leave your little mark on
society!
Don't you know your wish
is coming true today?
Another victim dies tonight.
Lie to me!
Rah! Rah!
Lie to me!
Is she insane?
Will she now run for her life
in the battle that ends this day?
Is she not right?!
Is she insane?!
Will she now run for her life
now that she LIED TO ME!
Ramidi ma ma din do!
Ramidi ma ma ba di ma!
Ramidi ma ma ba di mo!
[all x3]
Doesn't she realize she's in danger?
Is she insane?
Will she now run for her life
in the battle that ends this day?
Is she not right?!
Is she insane?!
Will she now run for her life
now that she LIED TO ME!
she went and she told A LIE!
Now she will never tell another.
A LIE!
The little bitch,
she went and she told A LIE!
NEVER FUCKING LIE TO ME!
The curtains start to move and out runs the energetic yet egotistical Robin Brooks, many of the fans disgusted by her presence. The X-Class title is wrapped around her waist and a disgusted grin is present on her face. Behind her back marches the huge leviathan, Phantom. He looks upset about the way his mommy is being booed by the crowd as the two head towards the ring for this World title bout. Brooks jumps to the apron then reaches down, patting Phantom lightly on his big head then slipping through the ropes into the ring. Once inside she hoists her X-Class title up high, receiving even more boos from the sold out crowd which causes her to grin with devious delight.
Comeau: We find ourselves now at the climax of what has been a strange edition of Riot! as Robin Brooks is on the verge of challenging Orlando Cruze for the World title. Although, I can’t condone the way she got this title match, I do believe she will push Cruze to his absolute limit.
Moore: Oh yeah, she will, and she’ll go on to become the greatest World Champion since Rowdy Roddy Piper.
Mark: Uh, Piper was never World Champion.
Susie: Okay then, Scott Hall.
Comeau: Just sit and enjoy the pretty colors.
Phantom gives his mother a thumbs up in the ring when the roof is almost blown from the building due to the crowd’s response over “You Know My Name” hitting the PA system. Without delay or further hype Orlando Cruze strolls through the curtains with the World Championship glistening brightly around his waist. He shoots his fist up into the air as pyrotechnics rock both sides of the stage. The fans are exasperating themselves via their loud cheering as Orlando starts towards the ring, one half of the Tag Team titles hanging from his hand. Robin and Phantom are equally repulsed as Cruze rolls under the ropes then hops to his feet, jumping to one of the turnbuckles where he lifts both the World and Tag titles high above his head.
Comeau: On a night where we’ve seen a forced marriage between rivals, Johnny Kingdom dressed up as a turkey, and an impromptu brawl between the Conspiracy, Riggs, and Jason Wheeler, we find ourselves now ready for World title action. The double Champion is here and Orlando Cruze is ready to put that gold on the line against what should be one of his toughest challenges to date.
Moore: Te-he, it’s going to be great seeing Robin beat him tonight so IWC can have it’s first female World Champion.
Comeau: Um, Hellkat held the World title.
Susie: Why must you correct me, you make me sound like an idiot.
Mark: You don’t need me to make you sound like a moron.
The World Title glistens as it’s raised above the head of the referee, Robin Brooks crouching in a corner, her eyes focused on the intense Icon. Cruze bends forward with his hands placed to his knees, ready for the clash that will shortly ensue. The bell sounds as Robin steps out of the corner wearing a conniving grin on her face, she actually extends her hand for a shake.
Comeau: Robin looking for a handshake, surprisingly.
Moore: Aww, she’s as sweet as butter.
Mark: What a terrible analogy.
Susie: Oh, sweet as tobacco?
Comeau: Even worse.
Robin continues to extend her hand out in the direction of Orlando, who stares down into the palm with confliction. Clearly Cruze is debating rather to embrace the handshake before finally slapping his palm into the Challenger’s. Laughter emanates from the diabolical Black Widow before she’s dragged forward, her legs swept out from under her. Cruze steps through the legs and rolls her over onto her stomach, locking in the sharpshooter to a huge reaction from the crowd. Brooks pushes herself up onto her elbows, screaming in pain.
Mark: Sharpshooter already locked in on the Black Widow! This may be the shortest World title match in history.
Moore: No, I didn’t even have time to talk about how much I like Robin’s hair.
A shocked Brooks claws her way across the canvas as Cruze continues to twist up her body. She now reaches the ropes and wraps her hand around the bottom cable, forcing the referee to jump into Cruze’s face commencing with a five count. He reaches four until Orlando breaks the sharpshooter, stepping to the center of the ring with a slight grin on his face. He now spins around in a crouched position, poised for the Rock Bottom. An aggravated Brooks gets to her feet then turns to face Orlando who steps in for the Rock Bottom only to have Robin yelp and dive through the ropes. She drops down on the outside mats right next to the large, intimidating Phantom, who doesn’t like what he’s seeing from Cruze thus far. The Icon actually has the audacity to give Phantom the “bring it” taunt only for Robin to hold him at bay.
Comeau: Cruze surprisingly enjoying himself in there as he defends his World title against Brooks.
Susie: Is he actually asking Phantom to come into the ring as well? Isn’t Robin enough for him?
Robin walks around the ring slowly, still gripping at her lower back while Orlando follows her with his eyes, anticipating the moment she re-enters the squared circle. Phantom steps up onto the apron now, causing Cruze to turn towards him, the World Champion stepping towards the massive obstacle. That’s when Robin slips into the ring behind Cruze, rushing in and blasting him to the back with a forearm strike while he was distracted. The shot sends Cruze reeling into the cables, Phantom dropping off the apron wearing a twisted grin of delight. Orlando has fallen to his knees leaning chest first against the middle rope while Robin stomps him to the back of the head and shoulders repeatedly. She steps back as Orlando turns on his knees, leaning side first against the cables. That’s when the X-Class Champion charges in, driving her foot against the side of his skull via the face wash.
Comeau: Phantom provided the distraction and now Robin is capitalizing.
Moore: And what a distraction Frankenberry is, he’s kind of hard to miss.
That last kick has disorientated Cruze to the point where he rolls across the ring into a seated position against the turnbuckle. Robin rushes in and jumps into the air, obtaining significant hang time before delivering a high impact front dropkick directly to Cruze’s sternum. The Black Widow rolls backwards out of the corner while Cruze instinctively tries to stand up gripping at his sternum. That’s before Robin charges back in, delivering jab after jab to his forehead, trying to inflict as much damage as possible. She backs up then rushes forward yet again, delivering a vicious knee strike to his sternum.
Phantom nods approvingly as the Icon is pulled to his feet, Brooks delivering a swift shin kick to his sternum. She now wraps her arm around his neck, rushing out of the corner and dragging the Icon face first into the canvas with a huge bulldog. Orlando’s face bounces off of the ring, his body rolling onto his back while Robin throws herself into the cover.
1
Cruze kicks out, persevering in this intense World title encounter. Brooks looks a bit miffed as she stands up and charges in with a leg drop to Cruze’s throat. She stands up and bounces off the ropes, rushing back in then dropping another leg across Orlando’s neck.
Comeau: Cruze at the mercy of Brooks after that distraction from Phantom.
Moore: Hehehe, Brooks is beating him up now, I like seeing women in dominant positions. Does that make me a lesbo?
Mark: Only in a number of my fantasies.
The stunned Cruze sits up as Robin scoots behind him, clamping her arms around his neck in a sleeper hold. She has the submission tightly clamped on, winking in her adopted son’s direction. Phantom smiles as a result, becoming giddy with joy while Robin continues to twist viciously at Cruze’s head. Orlando slowly begins to stand up though, grabbing her arm and prying it away from his throat. He swings around under it and twists her wrist, causing her to be rolled forward across the canvas where she ends up on her feet.
The second she stands she turns towards Cruze and charges at him, being caught by the arm then lifted into the air. Orlando drives her down face first into the canvas with a half nelson face buster.
Comeau: With one counter Orlando gets himself back into this World Title match.
Moore: If Robin needs a plastic surgeon after that last move I know a good one. Te-he, I sound just like one of those ignorant neighbors in Edward Scissorhands.
Mark: You got the ignorant part right.
Robin rolls onto her back, looking incoherent as Cruze stands and drops the point of his elbow directly into her chest. The World Champion rolls to his feet then drops like a falling tree head first directly into he Black Widow’s shoulder. She convulses as a result of these collisions, rolling away from the Icon who crawls up beside her, grabbing hold of her hair. Brooks is dragged to an upright base by the neck, being twisted around and dropped down into a reverse neckbreaker. Orlando now floats over into the lateral press, burying his forearm to her face.
1
2
Brooks kicks out, still reaching for her spine and trying to get up, Phantom looking worried by the punishment inflicted on his precious mother. An irritated Robin gets to her feet when Orlando steps up beside her, hooking her leg and her shoulder, snapping back into a Russian Leg Sweep. She slams hard into the ring while Orlando again floats over into the lateral press.
1
The Black Widow shoots her shoulder from the ring, avoiding the three count.
Comeau: Orlando going for some quick pins trying to reserve his energy and keep from suffering wear and tear the longer his title reign lasts.
An intense Cruze grabs Robin by the hair and sits her up on the canvas, now he’s the one who locks in a modified cobra clutch. He has his opponent reeling, the challenger feebly trying to fight her way free from this predicament. Every time she twists it only entices Cruze to apply further pressure on the hold. He licks his chomps as he tries to earn the submission and keep his belt, yet Brooks is still struggling. She defiantly begins to will herself upwards, Orlando squeezing at her neck with even more strength. Her adrenaline is kicking into overdrive as she stands up then jumps into the air, reaching back with her legs. She wraps them around Cruze’s waist then drops forward, trying to go for a wheelbarrow roll up. However, Orlando wraps his hands around her gut, causing her to land palms first on the canvas then push her upper body into the air. She reaches back with her arm, wrapping it around Orlando’s neck then pulling him down face first into the canvas with a bulldog.
Susie: CHICKEN NOODLE!
Comeau: Wheelbarrow bulldog by Brooks.
The face first impact with the canvas causes Cruze to pop up onto his knees, Brooks standing up behind him then rushing into the ropes. She bounces off, coming back in at the kneeling Cruze then flipping over top of his head, catching hold of it and puling him down into a reverse blockbuster. Cruze’s face is again driven viciously into the canvas, causing him to bounce back to a crawling base as the X-Class Champion stands up in front of him. She immediately lunges forward into a front dropkick, her soles planted viciously against the top of the Icon’s head.
Mark: What a combination by Brooks, targeting the head of the Icon that was brutalized on the last Riot!
Moore: Brooks is smarter than the average bear. One day she may steal my picnic basket.
Phantom slaps the apron and grins, enjoying the sight of his mother beating down Cruze, who is trying his best to recover. He swipes his hand over the bandage covering his forehead, slowly pushing himself up to his knees when Robin takes him around the neck, dropping back into a modified DDT. The top of Cruze’s head crashes against canvas, sending him rolling onto his back while the Black Widow rolls to her feet then flips forward into a senton leg splash right across the cranium of her opponent.
The impacts cause Cruze to convulse while Robin dives yet again into another cover.
1
2
Orlando defiantly shoots his shoulder from the ring, keeping his title in his possession at least for the moment. Brooks slams her fist on the canvas in annoyance, rising slowly to her feet then slipping through the ropes onto the apron. She grabs the top rope and springs onto it feet first, flying off high into the air. She extends her leg and comes down right across Cruze’s throat, hitting yet another leg drop variation. A groan is heard from the crowd as Cruze’s body kicks up into the air from the high impact landing.
Mark: If there’s one chink in Orlando’s armor that we’ve noticed over the past few weeks is that he’s got a weakness versus speed.
Moore: So your saying Speedy Gonzalez would beat him?
Comeau: Please stop putting such horribly ridiculous statements in my mouth.
The Icon is gasping for air while he rolls towards his elbows and knees Brooks stepping back and sizing him up. She rushes forward delivering a swift kick right to his ribs, the impact knocking him over onto his back. He grabs at his ribcage in pain while rolling away from Brooks, who steps in and slugs him hard to the jaw, then does it again. These shots are very stiff and leave Cruze wobbling back and forth at his knees, Brooks delivering a step up enzugari to the back of his head. The World Champion falls back to the canvas as Brooks crawls into a cover.
1
Cruze powers his shoulder from the ring, avoiding defeat just narrowly. An irritated yet confident Brooks stands up and waves towards her brutish son then motions towards herself.
Robin: Your looking at your next CHAMPION!
The crowd boos over this bold proclamation while Robin steps towards Cruze who suddenly throws a hard European Uppercut into her jaw. This stiff blow staggers Brooks, knocking her backwards before she lunges at her opponent, hitting him with a dropkick to the stitched up forehead. Cruze is knocked onto his back with Robin landing in front of him, a diabolical smirk on her face. She rubs at her jaw and rises to her feet, approaching the reeling Icon, who she takes around the neck. Orlando is pulled over onto his knees when he dives forward head first right into the Black Widow’s ribs, causing her to be bent forward. The air was knocked from her lungs, causing her to stumble back while Cruze rises to his feet and now rushes forward into a devastating European Uppercut. The move picks Robin off of her feet, sending her flying backwards across the ring.
Mark: That European Uppercut almost took Robin’s head off!
Susie: Then she’d be too short to ride a roller coaster.
An aching Black Widow rolls over in reverse onto her knees beginning to stand up when Orlando rushes in and hits her with another European Uppercut. The shot picks her up off of her feet and sends Robin flying back first into the turnbuckle, which she leans against spine first. Cruze spins around to glare at his prone opponent, charging directly at her then lunging forward into a hard forearm strike directly to her forehead. The shot is absolutely vicious, leaving Brooks in a completely incoherent condition.
He now rushes forward yet again when Brooks lifts her feet into the air, driving them straight against Cruze’s face. The double impact sends the Icon stumbling backwards in a dazed state as Robin pulls herself up the corner in reverse, standing on the second rope. She now launches herself off only to be caught across the sternum, Cruze looking for the Rock Bottom.
Comeau: This could be it.
Robin sticks out her leg and hooks it around behind Cruze’s, connecting with an inside leg trip. Cruze crashes onto his back as a result while Robin turns her spine towards him, flipping over into a huge moonsault. She crashes down right on top of Orlando and hooks his leg to Phantom’s approval.
1
2
Orlando gets his shoulder up just before any three count could be made.
Mark: Brooks again seconds away from possibly winning the World Heavyweight title.
Moore: She didn’t win, awww, I was ready to shoot off my confetti guns.
Comeau: Susie that’s a water pistol.
A motivated Black Widow stands beginning to stomp viciously at the Icon’s sternum, attempting to inflict the optimum amount of damage. He begins to set up while Brooks slugs him hard to the jaw then goes for the step up enzugari yet again. Cruze ducks his head, causing her foot to miss as she crashes down into the canvas. She pushes herself up to her elbows as Orlando scoots up behind her, setting up for the MMA elbows. The crowd is screaming as he begins to connect with shot after shot to the side of her face, inflicting an untold amount of damage to her skull. Phantom looks panicked before Brooks surprisingly slips between Cruze’s legs, grabbing his shins and pulling up on them. Orlando is tripped forward, crashing to the canvas while Brooks rushes into the ropes, bouncing off of them. She comes back in at the laid out Cruze and jumps into the air with a standing shooting star press. Cruze rolls onto his back lifting his knees into the air, the Black Widow crashing down right on top of them.
Mark: Brooks going for the Flying Star but crashing right into Orlando’s raised knees.
Susie: YES!
Comeau: Susie, that’s bad for Robin.
Moore: Awww, shucks!
All the air has been driven straight out of Robin’s lungs as she rolls across the canvas kicking her legs, arms draped over her lungs. Orlando momentarily grips at his knees while forcing his way to his feet ever so sluggishly. Just as he stands Robin comes charging in only to be caught against the Icon’s shoulder, who hoists her into the air with a powerful spinebuster. He then drops down rolling away from her, too winded to capitalize on this opportunity, allowing Brooks just a few moments time to recover.
Mark: Big spinebuster but Cruze just doesn’t have enough to make the cover.
The fans are slapping the barricades, trying to get behind Brooks who agonizingly reaches her feet. All the while Robin is doing the same, bolting towards the Icon who bends forward catching her against his shoulders. He lifts her up into the air then drops back into a big Samoan Drop, slamming her forcefully against the canvas.
Brooks reaches for her kidneys rolling across the canvas yet again while Orlando sits up on the ring, trying to shake off the effects of all the brutality inflicted on his cranium. He palms his forehead, running his hand over his wound while obtaining an upright base, Brooks attempting to do the same. An aggravated Cruze steps in and grabs her by the wrist, whipping her off across the ring only for Brooks to jump into the air, landing on the second rope then springing off. She twists in mid-air connecting with the dropkick to Cruze’s sternum. Both competitors are taken to the canvas, Robin rolling across the ring and under the ropes onto the apron.
She stands up taking hold of the top cable while Brooks slowly begins to stand in a state of aggravation. The second he reaches his feet Robin springs off the top rope, flying through the air then landing directly on top of his shoulders, snapping back into the hurricarana. Somehow Orlando maintains his footing and grabs hold of Robin’s legs, trying to step through them in order to re-apply the sharpshooter.
Comeau: Cruze has countered the hurricarana into position for the sharpshooter!
Moore: No, that’s not good right?
Mark: Correct.
Susie: Okay then…NO!
Both competitors are fighting, one to get the hold applied, the other to avoid it. Right before he can step through the legs, Robin rolls onto her back, sitting up and wrapping her arms around Cruze’s waist. She drops back, pulling the Icon down into a reverse roll. He ends up being rolled up onto the back of his shoulders while Robin sits on the back of his thighs, folding him up like an accordion. She now bridges over his body backwards, placing her palms to the canvas in a crab walk position, putting all her weight down on top of Cruze with this unique pin.
Comeau: Another very nice counter into a creative roll up!
Susie: She looks just like Linda Blair from the Exorcist. Oh great, I just peed myself.
The referee drops to the canvas, making the count amongst screams from the crowd.
1
2
Orlando kicks out causing Brooks to come down back first onto his sternum. He pushes up with his lower body, pushing Brooks up onto the back of her shoulders in almost a bridging German position.
1
2
At the last second Brooks kicks out, rolling over in reverse onto her knees then standing up and jumping into the air. She twists her body and comes down with a double stomp right into Orlando’s ribs then springs off his mid-section, flipping backwards into another standing moonsault. She comes crashing down right into the canvas to a loud reaction from the fans as Orlando rolled out of the way in the nick of time.
She grips at her ribs while standing up slowly Orlando stepping in and taking her around the neck. He drags her head under his seat and lifts her into the air in a powerbomb position. He now rushes forward to throw her through the air with the powerbomb when she snaps back into a hurricarana, throwing him through the air. Cruze crashes into the canvas hard spine first while the Black Widow gets to her feet and charges up to his side. She throws herself into the air with a standing shooting star press, hitting the Flying Star right across Orlando’s abdomen.
Mark: The Flying Star connects!
Moore: That was so aerial I feel like we should be under a circus tent.
Robin hooks Orlando’s leg with all her remaining strength while Phantom cheers on the outside.
1
2
3
Robin has done it, we have a NEW World Heavyweight Champion….no, wait, Orlando kicked out just before the three count.
Comeau: Ohhh, I thought for sure we had ourselves a new World Champion but Cruze barely kicks out.
Moore: Stop kicking out Orlando, let Robin be World Champion, pretty please.
The crowd is still shocked as Brooks sits up on the canvas, her eyes blinking awkwardly as she tries to grasp the fact that Orlando kicked out. It doesn’t appear to have set in yet as Brooks tentatively gets to her feet, exasperated by this World title encounter. She stands up slowly, pointing directly at the turnbuckle while Phantom claps excitedly on the outside. The X-Class title holder progresses towards the corner, slipping through the ropes to the apron then scaling the turnbuckle. She briefly grips at her ribs and back while just starting up the corner.
Comeau: She’s going for the standard Flying Star which will connect with much greater impact.
Moore: And win her the World title?
Mark: Possibly.
Susie: Yippee.
Brooks is distracted by her internal anguish, taking her eyes off of Cruze who has somehow gotten to his feet. With great speed he charges at Brooks, stepping up the turnbuckle and reaching over the ropes, grabbing her by the hair as she stands on the opposite side of the cables. She suddenly rakes his eyes though then grabs him around the back of the head, dropping off the corner and pulling him down throat first into the top rope. Cruze bounces off the cables across his neck, dropping to his feet then turning away from Robin as he grips at his throat, gasping for air. Robin slips through the ropes behind him and now crouches forward, her hand on her knee in preparation for the superkick.
Susie: Robin must have a cramp.
Comeau: Actually she’s setting up for the superkick.
As a dazed World Champion turns to face her, Robin steps in for the superkick. At the last conceivable second Cruze side steps the kick, catching Robin around the ankle with a drop toe hold. Brooks crashes forward into the canvas, Orlando jumping to her side and immediately dropping the elbows into the side of her head.
Comeau: The MMA elbows again by Cruze!
Each elbow connects with devastating force as Brooks surprisingly pushes herself up onto her knees then rolls forward, escaping being knocked unconscious by these shots. She rolls right onto her feet while holding her head then steps in for the superkick to a rising Cruze’s jaw. Orlando catches her foot right before it could connect with his jaw, pushing down on her leg and sending her into a spin. She turns around to face Orlando who catches her across the sternum, lifting her into the air. The crowd screams as Cruze sets up for the Rock Bottom only to have Robin turn, wrapping her legs around his waist.
She drops down to her palms across the canvas and pushes herself up into a wheelbarrow, reaching in reverse for his cranium. This time Cruze wedges his hands to her back, shoving her off before she could wrap up his head. As a result Brooks lands on her seat across the canvas, Orlando dropping down behind her and hooking her arm in a modified abdominal stretch. He now begins to hit the elbows to the side of her head repeatedly, the crowd erupting at the sight of this.
Susie: Not those knees again.
Comeau: Orlando with the ELBOWS to Robin once again and this time applying that abdominal stretch at the same time.
The elbows are inflicting tremendous damage on Robin’s cranium, yet she’s trying her best to hang in there. She tries to stand up only for more elbows to connect with her skull, bringing her right back down to her seat. Robin’s face is filled with determination but each devastating elbow connecting with such ferociousness is just too much for her brain to tolerate. Her eyes slowly close shut and her head hangs to the side, being rendered unconscious by the elbows. The official spots this turning and calling for the bell to a thunderous reception from the crowd.
Mark: Robin has been knocked completely out cold by the elbows, the referee stopping the match which means Orlando Cruze retains the IWC Championship!
Moore: Robin’s brain is going to be more liquefied than my own.
The majority of those in attendance are still screaming as Cruze drops to his seat, greatly winded after this trying World title encounter. Robin lays on the canvas, her eyes blinking awkwardly after the MMA elbows led to her downfall. On the outside of the ring Phantom is shaking his head with obvious anger in his eyes, not liking what Orlando just did to his mother. Instead of doing anything about it he oddly watches Orlando rise slowly to his feet, the World Championship being handed to him by the official. The gold is thrown over his shoulder, glistening as Cruze tries to catch his breath, Robin attempting to regain her senses behind him.
Despite his exhaustion he steps towards the turnbuckle, stepping up it to the second rope then thrusting the belt high above his head via an extension of his sweaty arm.
Mark: Orlando Cruze victorious here tonight, his curse with the belt is definitely over but how much longer can his luck last….
Savior: Ohhhh Crruuuuzeee.
SACRIFICE
The celebration is cut short, Orlando’s eyes quickly focusing on the titontron which seems to be the source of this voice. On the screen is the smiling face of Christian Savior as he clutches a hand held camcorder.
Comeau: What is this?
Susie: America’s Funniest Home Videos?
Rage is elicited from the fans at the mere sight of Christian who tilts his head, glaring into the camera lens diabolically. He seems sure that he had the World Champion’s undivided attention, which seems to be the case as Orlando’s eyes burn a hole into the big screen.
Christian: You sure are a forgetful one aren’t you?
This statement results in confusion from the double champion.
Savior: You forgot what kind of threat I could be and how wonderfully twisted I am….
Cruze smirks.
Christian: You forgot the attributes that made you a legend….
This results in a mere shake of the head from the Icon while the crowd boos over such a statement.
Savior: And you forgot all about the people who brought you to your legendary status. But Christian didn’t forget, not me. Unlike you, I’m willing to give credit where credit is due….
Orlando finds himself a bit more intrigued while remaining on the turnbuckle.
Savior: I don’t abandon those who helped me get to where I am today. I don’t leave them at the mercy of my enemies. Just like this guy, who instead of celebrating his wedding is forced to suffer for your sins.
The camcorder is aimed down into the blood submerged face of Nathan Creed. His chin is taken hold of and his head is held up so that his dreary eyes can look into the lens. The individual controlling the direction of his cranium is the Submission Champion Pat Evans. Orlando’s face is twisted and red with pure animosity.
Christian: How neglectful Cruze. You left your long time tag team partner all alone so you could go out and defend your World title. This is the man who held your hand through it all and yet you leave him in the lurch over a belt? That championship has become more important to you than anything or ANYONE, including your closest of friends, maybe even your family.
Orlando’s eyes narrow on the big screen, his blood boiling as Savior slaps Creed playfully on the cheek.
Savior: We’re going to find out just how important that title is to you, just how much your willing to SACRIFICE to keep it. The longer you deny me what is rightfully mine the more people I’m going to hurt, it could be friends like Creed, or it could be family like your lovely little wife, Kloe. What are you ready to give up to stay champion? How much are you going to tolerate? How much blood will be on our hands….
Claret is smeared from Creed’s cheeks and now drips from Savior’s fingers.
Savior:…before you’ve had enough, before you break down and finally give me MY belt!?! The answer is waiting Cruze, people will bleed on your account, but will you endure? Let’s find out shall we?
Demonic laughter emanates from Savior as a railroad spike is lifted in front of the camera, the sharp point sparkling. Pat begins to chuckle as well as he pulls Nathan’s head towards the spike, the camera cutting to static. Orlando is now rushing up the ramp and towards the backstage area, charging to his partner’s defense if it’s not already too late.
Comeau: This is hard to watch, the Conspiracy have Nathan Creed at their mercy backstage and you just heard the threat that Savior made. He’s going to keep hurting people until he gets what he wants from Cruze.
Susie: This is scarier than a Uwe Boll movie.
Orlando has vanished through the curtains with the fans still screaming over the ghastly sight backstage. Inside of the ring Phantom has assisted Robin to her feet as she continues to hold her head.
There is a house in New Orleeaannnss
They call the Rissssiinnng Sun
It’s been the ruin of many a poor boy
And lord I know I’m one…
Robin and Phantom both glare in disbelief up the ramp towards Hurse who comes staggering out onto the stage, his arm draped over his ribs. He is doubled over, only semi-conscious after the brutality that was inflicted on him earlier tonight.
Comeau: Hurse coming out here? I didn’t think he was tough enough to even survive the beating he received earlier from Savior and Evans let alone walk upright.
Moore: Well he wouldn’t want to lay on a stretcher. Their dirty.
Confusion continues to riddle the minds of Brooks and Phantom, neither of them clear why the Master of Control is on his way to the ring. They continue to be plagued by these questions as Hurse rolls under the ropes, still gripping at his ribs and agonizing as he rises to his feet. He steps across the ring requesting a microphone which is slapped into his palm by a concerned Kailey Worf. Even holding the mic seems to cause Hurse pain, his other fist clinching a little tighter.
Mark: Hurse told us that he had something to say earlier tonight before he was rudely interrupted by Pat Evans and Christian Savior, and apparently he won’t let it go.
Susie: I hope he sings show-tunes.
It’s clear that Phantom is now more bitter than perplexed while Hurse steps towards an aching Robin. Both lovers are a little worse for wear as Hurse takes Brooks’ hand into his own.
Hurse: Robin, I have something I desperately….ne…need to ask you. This time it doesn’t have any…anything to do with buying me better mouth wash.
Brooks is in no mood for her boyfriend’s antics, visibly rolling her eyes. He stammers and stumbles through his words, perhaps from a mixture of pain and anxiety.
Hurse: I have a umm, a question for you my lovely little Broccoli Stick. I tried to ask earlier but some goons I’ll deal with later got in my way, but nothing is going to stop me NOW…
After making this bold statement he jumps back, looking towards the heavens as if expecting to be struck down with a bolt of lightning. His antics only further aggravate the mother and son duo.
Hurse: Okay, now that that’s established, I realized what was tearing our relationship apart.
Brooks questions where he’s coming from.
Hurse: I realized what was missing from my life and causing me to lose time after time again. It’s the same thing missing from your life. We need closure, we need fulfillment….
Hurse drops to his knee, glaring up into the eyes of Brooks then removing something from the back of his trunks.
Hurse: Robin, I know you’re still head over heels in love with me, and I have fond feelings for you as well. I guess what I’m saying is that your line hooked the ultimate catch.
A little box is held out towards Robin, who’s eyes widen with what can be described as surprising dismay.
Susie: EWWW, I’m gonna cry.
The box is opened to reveal a small shimmering ring.
Hurse: This show has already been a love fest on the scales of 90210, so what do you say we add to the melodrama? Robin Brooks, will you marry me?
As the question is rendered Robin finds herself almost feint, not knowing how to react. Phantom is shaking his head “no” with urgency while Hurse remains kneeling in front of his intended fiancee, ring still desperately extended. Robin just glares pale as a sheet upon the ring unable to muster a response.
FADE TO BLACK