OPENING VIDEO PACKAGE
The fans are shown throwing their hands into the air in slow motion, caught in different colors, with the feed freezing every so often on a crazed spectator’s features, exhilarated by what they are witnessing. It then cuts to aerial scenes of the city streets below with cars buzzing by an arena in fast motion.
If you feel so empty
So used up so let down
If you feel so angry
So ripped off so stepped on
You're not the only one
Refusing to back down
You're not the only one
So get up
The fans are again shown going even more crazy with their fists held up high, the camera freezing on a clinched set of digits, as it turns from normal color to a black and white hue. It then switches to Faust hanging upside down from one of the corners, his fangs flashing through his smiling lips. That’s before it cuts to a huge crowd of people, clamoring to enter the Manhattan Center.
Let's start a riot, a riot
Let's start a riot
Let's start a riot, a riot
Let's start a riot
Scenes cut from the crazed fans in the stands to deranged mobs throwing Molotov cocktails down the street with burning rags stuck out from the top of them. It switches quickly to Johnny Kingdom and Orlando Cruze glaring at each other awkwardly before shifting to Aurora Rose running down the ramp, with a big smile. It then cuts to Jackson Adams being choked out with a crowbar to his throat from Jon Rich before shifting to an explosion rocking through a building while it crumbles and collapses to the ground. Desolation is then featured jumping off the top of a cage roof with a shooting star press.
If you feel so filthy so dirty
so fucked up
If you feel so walked on
So painful so pissed off
You're not the only one
Refusing to go down
You're not the only one
So get up
Police are shown gathered in a straight line with shields held out in front of them, dressed in all riot gear while marching down the street. The video then switches to Silencer delivering the Break the Silence on a hapless victim. Thankfully the images transfer to Too Magnificent bashing someone over the head with a trash can before cutting to Nathan Creed maliciously glaring about his surroundings. Another image features Orlando Cruze standing on the stage and raising his arm above his head, as pyros explode on all sides of him. This image is short lived as people are featured being detained, cuffs slapped around their wrists while being forced into the backs of large police vans. Axl Evermore takes up the screen resting on his knees with the Cartel title hanging from his grasp and drenched in sweat.
Let's start a riot, a riot
If you feel so empty Let's start a riot, a riot
Let's start a riot
Let's start a riot, a riot
Let's start a riot
So used up, so let down
If you feel so angry
Just get up
Let's start a riot
Let's start a riot, a riot
Let's start a riot
Robin Brooks takes up the screen diving off the top rope with a moonsault and coming crashing down stomach first towards the camera that was aimed upwards to catch a glimpse of her in all of her acrobatic splendor. The package then showcases Jackson Adams smiling pompously into the camera before shifting to a bloodied grinning face of Psycho, his dementia clear within his wide deranged eyes. Riggs is shown springing to the top rope and then flying through the air over the barricade. Police are shown beating some looter with their knight sticks until Dan Douglas’ chuckling face overtakes the screen. Pat Evans is then the focus of attention, ripping at a victim’s ankle with a tough, yet textbook submission. That’s before images are shown of Jon Rich delivering a missile dropkick as well as Orlando giving the Rock Bottom on Desolation. It then switches abruptly to Axl Evermore standing face to face with the Ladder which holds the Cartel title. It cuts to a burning building, people running out of the flaming structure with stolen goods.
Let's start a riot, a riot
Let's start a riot
Let's start a riot, a riot
Let's start a riot
Orlando is shown standing amongst family and friends, being showered by confetti while the World Title belt is raised above his head. Abruptly the video switches to Psycho delivering the Psychotic Episode on one of his many victims before transitioning into an image of Silencer superkicking one of his opponent’s directly under their jaw. Riggs is shown seated in the corner of the ring before cutting to Pat Evans holding onto the fujiwara. The video switches to Christian Savior standing in a hallway with light hitting him from behind, almost enveloping him as a result.
RIOT!
THE KITTY COMETH
The show cuts live to the interior of the Manhattan Center but for the second straight week in a row there is no massive pyrotechnics display ushering us forth into another Riot! Instead the houselights rise over a pitch black ring, revealing two all too familiar figures who are promptly met with a mixed applause. IWC Cartel Champion Ladder is positioned in the center of the ring, and seated on top of it is the man who bestowed the gold onto the inanimate title holder, Desolation.
Mark Comeau: IWC Riot! beginning tonight with Desolation and Ladder in the ring, this is Mark Comeau joining you on what already looks to be a wild night in the ANNALS of IWC history.
Susie Moore: Why am I never allowed to introduce myself anymore? Hi, it’s me Susie.
Comeau: The LESS airtime you get the MORE brain-cells we retain.
A microphone is gripped in Desolation’s palm as he apathetically raises it to his lips.
Desolation: Tonight there will be no Goobledy Gooker…
Cheers erupt from the sold out crowd.
Desolation: Tonight there will be no Yeti….
Their ovation only escalates.
Desolation: There won’t even be any emo trashcans…
Some of the more gothic fans would weep if their mascara wouldn’t run.
Desolation: I wanted them all to be here on this special evening but the IWC claimed they’d be hit with far too many copyright infringement lawsuits. And according to the Scientologist bible having the Goobledy Gooker and Yeti in the same ring at the same time is the first sign of the apocalypse, so sadly it was not to be.
Desolation gets a little emotional when thinking of what could have been.
Desolation: But in retrospect they all would have been overshadowed by the LEGEND that I intend to resurrect. And I didn’t even need any colorful green slime in a syringe or forbidden incantations to do it. The moment is now, I’m not going to wait around all night long and provide the IWC with the ratings boosts that these “mystery” angles award them. I’m not that charitable.
Comeau: What a nice guy.
Moore: I can’t believe nobody told me Ladder was going to be here tonight, I’m so under-dressed.
The Dark Man ensures that he has the audience captivated; of course a set of jingling keys would have them equally as fascinated.
Desolation: I am on the verge of unveiling a being more powerful than any twisted abomination you’d find in the Cthulhu Mythos. This is a creature so dangerous and yet so beautiful you would think it originated from the city of R’lyeh itself. So sit in wonder and gaze upon the ferocious, seductive and…..
Blah, blah, blah…SO Sorry to interrupt.
To a huge reaction Johnny Kingdom rolls into the ring, the fans having been so swept up in Desolation’s monologue that they hadn’t noticed him making his way to the ring.
Mark: Johnny Kingdom entering the squared circle with Desolation, which we can surmise is not very good.
Moore: Where’s his turkey costume?
Desolation’s and Johnny’s eyes interlock as the Dark Man stares down at the Team Leader from his high perch.
Desolation: Have you no decency Kingdom, or brains for that matter? Don’t you realize that the combined mite of both Desolation and Ladder is more than enough to smite you?
Kingdom: Yeah, yeah, smite me all you want and keep living vicariously through your ladder.
Johnny dismissively waves off the Dark Man while leaning carelessly forearm first against the ropes.
Johnny: From down here I can see that your nose has healed up rather nicely after last week.
Desolation: Yes and from this tactical position I’m blinded by the gleam from your bald scalp, so get on with your point, I’m in the midst of an introduction here.
A surprisingly gentle grin inhabits Johnny’s face.
Kingdom: You are definitely the master of the rebuttal Desolation. I’m sure you were the envy of your high-school debate class, as well as the king of the audio visual club. But your teenage similarities to Louis Sklonik aren’t important right now. I came out here for the purposes of a challenge.
Desolation: HA! A challenge?
Johnny: Indeed. But maybe you won’t accept because I’m not challenging you to a belching contest, a potato sack race, or an H.P Lovecraft reading competition, we all know you shy away from accepting actual “in ring challenges.”
Desolation: True, but that’s mainly against people who have yet to prove themselves, bore me, or have less in ring talent than the bastard child of Luna and Mantaur. All of the above can be said about you.
Comeau: Ouch.
Moore: I know. I put my shoes on the wrong feet today too.
The crowd has a mixed response to these statements while Johnny lowers his head, chuckling slightly.
Kingdom: Come off it Dark Man, there’s nobody here worth “proving myself” against and I’ve already been there, done that. You’re not talking to some bland newbie like Jon Rich, or Axl “I couldn’t be interesting even if I lit my balls on fire” Evermore, you’re talking to the longest reigning World Champion in the history of the ULW. The only other man on this roster who could claim to have as many victories under his belt as you and still maintain a much slimmer waistline.
Cheers emanate from the crowd while Desolation sighs over such petty fat jokes.
Johnny: You’re talking to the Team Leader, the Career Killer, THE Johnny Kingdom. You’re talking to the man who won’t stop talking until you answer his challenge. A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K…
Desolation: Alright, enough, ENOUGH…
Kingdom finally stops talking much to Desolation’s relief.
Desolation: I’ll accept your challenge on the basis that it took a lot of balls to dress up in that Goobledy Gooker costume.
Kingdom: It itched like crazy.
Desolation: I can imagine. So there, you got what you wanted, Desolation versus Johnny Kingdom at the Overbooked Extravaganza, now leave before Ladder looses its patience.
The fans are absolutely going nuts as they hear this wonderful news, the match of the decade being confirmed for the impending pay-per-view. They salivate at the mouths thinking of the prospect of Johnny Kingdom stepping into the ring with Desolation for the first time ever.
Comeau: That is huge, Desolation will finally step into the ring against Kingdom. I can’t tell you how long I’ve waited to see this match.
Moore: I can, about five minutes.
Johnny nods, beginning to slip through the ropes to the outside of the ring so that Desolation can get on with his introduction. He abruptly halts though, lifting the microphone back to his lips.
Johnny: Oh yeah, there’s just one more thing.
Kingdom drops the microphone, rushing across the ring and shoving Ladder with all his strength. Desolation swings his arms in order to achieve flight or balance himself out, either goal fails to be achieved as he comes crashing off the top of the ladder. He tumbles sternum first into the top rope, bouncing off then turning towards Kingdom who begins to drill him over and over again to the jaw with right hands.
Moore: Hey, Ladder didn’t provoke Kingdom at all!
Comeau: Johnny unwilling to leave this on a peaceful note and determined to ruin Desolation’s big introduction for a second week in a row.
Desolation is completely caught off guard as Kingdom nails him with right hand after right hand, backing him into the turnbuckle. He falls against it spine first as Johnny now grabs the top rope, kicking him to the mid-section, all fired up. The fans are going nuts at the sight of this physicality between Desolation and Kingdom.
Mark: Kingdom getting some revenge after that vicious attack many weeks ago at the hands of Desolation!
That heinous collision with the top rope has knocked all the wind out of Desolation, thus leaving him incapable of putting up much of a defense as he slips down the turnbuckle, falling to his bum. Kingdom continues to stomp him to the damaged sternum and stomach while the crowd’s screams escalate to a super high, ear popping frequency for some strange reason. A highly motivated Kingdom turns away from the laid out Dark Man when he discovers the reason for the abrupt change in the crowd’s tune, walking right into a superkick under the jaw.
Johnny crashes to his back amongst a deafening roar, for the individual who laid him out was none other than HELLKAT.
Comeau: What is SHE doing here?
Moore: It’s my job remember?
Mark: Not YOU, her, Hellkat!
Susie: Oh, be more specific next time.
The ferocious feline stands in the center of the ring turning in circles with her arms extended to her sides, listening to the glass shattering squeals of the ticket holders. Johnny lays at her feet, holding his jaw and looking as if he’s been knocked unconscious by the unexpected kick. All the while Desolation pulls himself up to his feet, staggering towards the microphone he dropped then lifting it from the canvas. He thrusts his arm out over his wife’s shoulders, lifting the mic to his smiling lips.
Desolation: Welcome back the greatest World Champion in ULW history who never even wanted the belt in the first place….
Hellkat apathetically shrugs.
Desolation: HELLKAT!
The fans continue to verbally express their shock while Hellkat and Desolation stand over the laid out body of Johnny Kingdom.
Comeau: What a shocking start to tonight’s show, not only has it been made official that we’ll be seeing Kingdom versus Desolation at the Overbooked Extravaganza, but Hellkat is making her long awaited return to the ring.
Moore: A half woman, half cat is in the ring, things have suddenly become much more frightening in the IWC.
Hellkat and Desolation turn towards Johnny, the former ULW World Champion lifting her clawed fingers into the air and waving them towards the laid out Kingdom.
COMMERCIAL BREAK
IWC…..where slow motion wrestling is worshipped.
THE RAINES SISTERS
VS.
AXL EVERMORE & HELLKAT
The show returns live to the inside of the Manhattan Center where Hellkat is pawing at the canvas in her corner, trying to make herself comfortable. Desolation is seated in a chair at ringside with Ladder stood up beside him and Johnny Kingdom is nowhere in sight. Referee Stuart Wright is present to officiate the upcoming match. All the while Axl Evermore’s music is starting to blare over the PA system. A booming voice sounds over the PA, with one of those swooshing sound effects that build to a crescendo.
"You know who I AM, where I've BEEN, where I'm GOING, how I'll GET there...and all that's left is to tell you's that I'm finally HERE!"
The feed fades to the Tron video, and as the lead singer for Drowning Pool screams the opening "1, 2, 3, STEP UP!!" to their song "Step Up", a name is spelled out on the black video background in bold red Sofachrome font letters: Axl Evermore. In between some of the letters, a split-second of Evermore-in-action impact clips are shown. It fades to a front view of the stage, with Evermore--wearing his Fully Loaded team jacket--looking down on one knee, arms outstretched like he just landed from a jump. He stands up and he RVD's a thumbs pose, shouting "A...X...L!" as the crowd chants along, then thrusts open the snaps of his jacket, revealing his well-toned waist.
Kaily Wolf: Heading to the ring, hailing from NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK...weighing in at 246 pounds...AXL...EVERMORE!!
He heads to the ring with stern focus and an energetic gait as the crowd cheers, then jumps and dives through between the middle and bottom ropes, tumbling forth into a hop, into a standing position at the center of the ring. He jogs to a corner, climbs it and thrusts his arms up and points to himself again, shouting "A...X...L!" as the crowd chants along. He hops down from the corner, takes his jacket and shades off, putting the shades in a jacket pocket, and draping the jacket over a corner post, then takes his bandanna off and throws it into the audience. Axl then turns Hellkat towards Hellkat, cautiously gazing at the woman he gave the Unsanctioned Championship to many months ago.
Comeau: Welcome back to Riot!, as you can see Hellkat and Axl Evermore are in the ring prepared to compete in tag team competition. During the break while Kingdom was being assisted to the back, Desolation said he couldn’t wait to see Hellkat compete so he demanded this tag team match start right now.
Moore: I want to see the kitty fight too.
Mark: Of course you do. I don’t even know if Evermore was aware he’d be teaming with Hellkat tonight.
Susie: That’s okay, I didn’t even know they were suppose to have a tag match.
Hellkat makes herself comfortable in the corner while Evermore approaches her, stating that he’d like to start the match for his team. That’s when the lights flash pink and purple on the stage and a crazed laughter is heard over the PA system, it then progresses into “Skinny Little Bitch” by Angelspit. Hellkat rubs at her ears, complaining to Desolation that the music is hurting her super sensitive hearing. Through the curtains now strolls Stacy Raines, Jessica Raines and their manager Conner Anderson. He stands between the two lovely yet deadly ladies who wrap their arms around each other’s shoulders and start down the ramp.
Once the Gothic Diva and the Cyber Bitch reach the ring they jump to the apron, slipping through the ropes then climbing adjacent corners which they back flip out of. Again Hellkat is protesting, this time to Evermore.
Hellkat: Nobody told me we wrestling the Circus O Le..
She points to the demonic clown on the outside of the ring.
Mark: The Raines sisters making their return to the IWC in the form of tag team competition here tonight, accompanied to the ring by Conner Anderson, a rather disturbed young man to say the least.
Moore: There’s killer cats and clowns in this match? I knew I should have brought my crucifix.
Jessica “The Gothic Diva” Raines starts out the match for her team, while Hellkat gladly slides to the apron, letting Evermore face her. Axl and Jessica begin to circle each other when she lets out of a piercing scream and rushes forward for a lariat. Evermore ducks it and switches behind her back, clamping his arms around her waist. She promptly elbows him to the side of the head, trying to free herself. She goes for another elbow but Axl catches it, swinging around under her wrist and establishing an arm ringer submission. He then drops down away from her, delivering a quick arm drag that flips Jessica completely over sideways.
Comeau: Evermore with an aggressive start to this tag team encounter.
Moore: No, I like Jessica Raines’ boots, their HUGE.
Jessica just starts to get to her feet when Axl rushes in, clamping his arms around her neck in a side headlock. She stands up quickly though and then uses her massive goth boots to her advantage, kicking at the back of Axl’s knee. He grimaces in pain as she now frees her head and jumps into the air, connecting with a spinning heel kick to the back of Evermore’s cranium. Her huge boot slaps against his skull, knocking Axl down to his elbows and knees.
Conner is shouting instructions gleefully while Jessica rushes into the ropes behind the crawling Evermore, bouncing off then stepping onto his back. She stands on top of Axl’s spine then stomps down with her other foot right to the back of his head. Evermore’s face slams hard into the canvas, causing him to pop up onto his knees while Jessica lands on the canvas in front of him, turning quickly then lunging into the air with a front dropkick. Her long heels slam with devastating results into Axl’s face.
Comeau: Those boots certainly coming in handy for Jessica. I wonder if those are even legal.
Moore: You can’t outlaw boots silly.
Mark: Legal in a wrestling match!
The constant kicks leaves Axl dazed as he his eyes flutter, Jessica promptly approaching her partner and slapping Stacy’s hand. Desolation watches on while rubbing at his sternum, still feeling the effects of his fall from Ladder, which watches the match right along side him. Jessica approaches Axl, puling him to his feet then locking up his body in a prone abdominal stretch. This predicament allows Stacy to begin stomping and punching at his exposed ribs, even throwing head-bunts into it. She rushes into the cables, bouncing off them lunging forward into a hard flying head-bunt right into Axl’s ribs, causing him to bend forward aching in pain.
Susie: I wish I worked as good with my sister, we never got along, and the worse part about it is she’s imaginary.
Comeau: Wonderful. Evermore started this match with some great intensity but the Raines sisters cohesively working together to slow him down.
That vicious head-bunt to the mid-section has Axl doubled over in pain while Jessica and Stacy rush into the ropes on opposite sides of him. They bounce off and comes barreling in, jumping into the air with both of their knees connect to opposite sides of Axl’s skull. Conner smiles at the sight of this while Evermore drops to his knees, gripping at his cranium. Finally the Gothic Diva vacates the ring while the Cyber Bitch stays in, throwing jab after jab into Evermore’s forehead.
The official admonishes her for it but Stacy isn’t listening, she just continues to unload on Axl before rushing backwards into the ropes. She bounces off and comes back in at Evermore who suddenly stands, catching Stacy with a tilt a whirl backbreaker right across his knee. He then pulls her off his knee to a standing base, wrapping his arm around her neck and lifting her into the air with a brainbuster right across the canvas.
Comeau: A very nice combination by Axl getting himself back into this contest. A tag might be smart at this point.
Moore: Okay, I’ll tag you.
Mark: Smart for Axl, I don’t think anything you do can even remotely be construed as smart.
Hellkat claps with no real genuine emotion while Evermore lays on his back, trying to recover from all those hard shots he took to the skull from the boot. Despite the damage inflicted on him he begins to crawl towards his corner only to have a barely conscious Stacy catch hold of his ankle, keeping him from going any further. Axl rolls onto his back and kicks her away in the same fluid motion of rolling in reverse onto his feet. Somehow Stacy maintained her footing and now charges forward only to have Axl catch her around the neck, looking for the stunner.
Comeau: Fully Loaded by Evermore!
Just before he can hit it the dazed Stacy drops down and catches the back of Axl’s tights, dragging him into a school boy. She stands up holding onto his legs then dropping back into a catapult where he ends being launched face first into the boot of Jessica Raines. Her foot was placed over the top rope in anticipation of this maneuver from her sister. Axl falls backwards to the canvas, holding his jaw after that vicious boot while Stacy gets to her feet making the tag to her sister.
Jessica enters the ring and steps to the crawling Evermore’s side, kicking him hard to the ribs. The shot knocks Axl over onto his back, covering his mid-section in pain before Jessica stomps him with that big goth boot right to the sternum. His mid-section is writhing in pain while Jessica jumps high into the air, extending her leg then dropping it directly across Evermore’s throat to boos from the crowd.
Comeau: The Raines sisters just continuing to work as a well oiled machine.
Moore: Their not even oily. Sure their hair is a little greasy, but that’s it.
Mark: This whole taking everything I say literally stuff is getting old.
Hellkat has her chin placed to her palms while her elbows are propped across the top rope, watching the action ensue inside of the ring in a bored fashion. Jessica takes Axl around the neck, leading him to his feet in a front chancery then backing towards her corner where she sticks her dangerous boot out for the tag. Stacy slaps it and enters the ring, stepping to Evermore’s side then delivering a clubbing axehandle blow directly over his back. The shot causes Evermore’s legs to become a bit unstable as he is unleashes from the front chancery and pushed forward into the ropes.
Axl falls chest first against the top cable, his arms dangling over it while Jessica grabs hold of his legs, lifting them into the air and pinning them in her armpits. Evermore’s body is now elevated above the ring while Stacy rushes across it, placing her palms to Jessica’s shoulders and leap frogging her in order to come crashing down seat first right across her opponent’s spine.
Susie: That looks so fun, their playing leap frog and using Evermore as a trampoline.
Comeau: This is not all fun and games Susie, the Raines sisters are doing a significant amount of damage to Axl Evermore who really desperately needs to make that tag.
Somehow Axl remains upright even after that last dangerous move, leaning side first against the ropes for support. That’s when Stacy slugs him hard to the jaw, then does it yet again, inflicting a lot of damage in the process. She takes him by the hair and drags him away from the ropes, leading him to the center of the ring where she drives the top of her elbow right across the bridge of his nose.
The shot almost sends Axl crashing to the ring but Stacy makes sure he remains upright by keeping hold of his hair. She now drags him forward, wedging her head under his jaw and dropping to her seat, connecting with a modified jaw breaker.
Pain shoots through Axl’s jaw as he staggers backwards, maintaining his footing long enough for Stacy to roll back to her feet and come charging in. Somehow Evermore has the wherewithal to step forward, catching Stacy with another tilt a whirl only for her to spin out of it into position for the hurricarana. Before she can connect Axl pushes up on her seat, sending the young woman flying over top of his head and landing on her feet behind him. She quickly spins around as Axl reaches back, catching her around the neck and dropping into the Fully Loaded.
Mark: Axl finally hitting the stunner, but does he have enough left in him to make the tag?
Susie: I hope so, I want to see that mean looking Hellkitty get in there and hack up a hairball.
Comeau: Disturbing.
Stacy flies back half way across the ring after suffering the stunner, ending up on her back just like Axl, who is trying his best to recover. His chest heaves with exhaustion and his mind is clouded by the pain coursing through his body. There doesn’t appear to be much left in the tank to make a tag while Desolation stews at ringside, clearly not liking where this is going. Hellkat turns to look over her shoulder at the Dark Man.
Hellkat: Do I have time for a quick restroom break?
Desolation shrugs his shoulders then disappoints her by shaking his head “no.” If Conner Anderson could frown he would at the sight in the ring as he slaps the apron, shouting at Stacy to make the tag. She is far too dazed after the stunner to do much of anything yet somehow she still turns to her side, dragging her aching body towards her corner. A tired Axl turns over to his elbows and knees, looking up through dazed eyes at his corner, slowly starting to crawl towards it. That’s when Stacy makes the tag, slapping the outstretched hand of her sister. Jessica jumps over the ropes and comes barreling forward, lunging into the air for a double stomp to Axl’s lower back.
Her massive boots come crashing down right into the canvas, Evermore having rolled out of the way to avoid it. Jessica looks over her shoulder at a kneeling Axl, flipping over backwards for some type of Pele kick. However, Evermore stands up and catches her on top of his shoulders, holding the shocked Gothic Diva in a fireman’s carry. He now pushes her around into a swinging reverse DDT.
Susie: BEJESUS!
Comeau: Axl hitting what I believe he calls the Michaelson Reverse DDT after shockingly catching Jessica right on top of his shoulders. I don’t know how he had the strength remaining to do that.
Moore: He must have eaten some spinach. That’s how Popey the Sailor Man gets his strength, that and roids.
Jessica is flopping on the canvas like a fish out of water as Evermore rolls away from her, trying his best to recover from this physical onslaught. After a moment’s delay he rolls back towards her, reaching out and grabbing one of her boots, beginning to untie it. He unfastens the laces and removes the goth boot, throwing it at Anderson through the ropes. The psychotic clown knocks it away from him while Evermore removes the other boot that’s caused him so much frustration in this contest.
The dazed Stacy just gets to her feet on the apron when Evermore pitches the boot into the back of her head, knocking her down off of the apron. She rubs at her cranium in pain while Axl stands up and stomps the bare foot of the Gothic Diva, causing her to sit up shouting in pain. As soon as she does this Evermore charges in throwing his entire body back first right into her sternum. Jessica is knocked onto her back due to the log roll from Axl as he continues to roll across the canvas right onto his feet.
Comeau: Axl building some momentum by getting rid of those goth boots but I’m not sure why he hasn’t made the tag yet.
Moore: Quick Mark, go grab me those boots, I’ll never wear them because they look terribly uncomfortable but at least I can say I own a pear.
It appears that Axl is getting his second wind as he rises to his feet, a stunned Jessica beginning to stand up in front of him. He now steps in and delivers a hard uppercut shot right to her jaw, causing her to stand completely upright. As she is left in this dazed state Evermore spins around for a big left hook that Jessica surprisingly ducks, bending down and wrapping her arms around Axl’s back. She seems to be trying for a suplex before Evermore charges forward into the ropes, dragging her along behind him.
He hits the cables chest first then pushes off with his back, causing Jessica to fall to the canvas and roll in reverse to the center of the ring. The second he hits the ropes though, Stacy jumps to the apron and smacks him in the face with the boot he threw at her a few moments ago. This causes Axl to turn towards the center of the ring, staggering forward when Jessica charges in and connects with a step up enzugari to the back of his head. Evermore tumbles to the canvas, Jessica pushing him over onto his back and hooking his leg.
1
2
Axl gets his shoulder up from the canvas.
Moore: That boot sure has been the MVP of this match.
Comeau: Please don’t give Desolation any ideas or we’ll have a boot as her Cartel Champion next.
Hellkat blows a stray strand of hair out of her face as she pouts, waiting solemnly for the tag. It doesn’t appear that’s about to happen as Jessica drags Axl to his feet and turns him around so that his spine is facing her. She takes him around the head, ready to jump into the air for the Raines Blood (Inverted X-Factor). That’s when Axl grabs her by the wrist and falls forward, flipping Jessica over his back into a forward roll across the canvas. She ends up on her feet, turning towards Evermore who comes barreling towards her. The quick Jessica lunges into the air for a spinning heel kick only for Axl to duck it and lunge forward, tagging an unsuspecting Hellkat. She looks back and forth before finally pointing at herself, asking rather she’s legally been tagged or not.
Hellkat: Figures, just when I was getting comfortable.
Jessica comes barreling towards the ULW legend who ducks her head and flips forward over the ropes, her legs landing on Raines’ shoulders. She now twists around, sending her opponent flying through the ropes with a head scissors. Stacy enters the ring to get her hands on Hellkat before the vicious kitty ducks into a roll and then flips out of it, landing right on top of her shoulders with remarkable agility. She spins around and flips the Cyber Bitch into a release hurricarana.
Comeau: Hellkat entering the ring for the first time in years and she has not missed a beat.
Moore: Missed a Beat? Isn’t that the show hosted by Wayne Brady? I love Wayne Brady, he makes me feel African American.
The former World Champion rises to her feet as Jessica begins to re-enter the ring, sticking her head through the top and middle cable. This inspires Hellkat to rush past her, springing to the perpendicular middle cable then twisting around in mid-air and dropping leg first right across the back of Jessica’s head. She tumbles forward face first into the canvas while the legendary Hellkat jumps to her feet, turning to observe the fans who are lavishing her with praise. That’s when Stacy rushes up behind her, delivering a hard forearm to her upper back.
Hellkat is knocked forward as Stacy springs into the air and dropkicks her right between the shoulder blades. The shot sends the former champ charging forward into the ropes. She bounces off of them and comes back in at Stacy who drops to her chest and stomach in front of her. This forces Hellkat to cartwheel over Raines right back to her feet, her opposition standing up and charging in. Unfortunately Stacy runs right into a superkick under the jaw from Hellkat that receives a huge applause from the fans.
Comeau: Even after being out of the ring for years Hellkat looks phenomenal in there since receiving the tag.
Moore: It’s all that cat DNA, she’s just like catwoman, only a better actress then Hallie Berry.
Hellkat spins around after delivering the superkick just in time to spot the Gothic Diva flying off the top rope, delivering a soaring forearm strike right to the vicious kitty’s jaw. The blow knocks both competitors down but Jessica quickly rises to her feet, having taken out the former champion finally. She has no time to celebrate because Axl is re-entering the ring, charging in for a jab. She ducks under it though and rushes into the ropes behind him, jumping to the middle cable then springing off and twisting into an attempted hurricarana. The nimble Raines lands on his shoulders only for Axl to drop into a sit-out powerbomb.
Comeau: And Axl back in there with a big counter into the sit-out powerbomb, what opening match action we’re seeing here.
Jessica rolls across the canvas holding her spine while Evermore remains seated on the canvas, unaware that Stacy is charging at him. Before he can react Stacy jumps over his head, catching him around the neck and pulling him down into a blockbuster, being hit with a version of his normal partner’s finishing move. He grabs at his head and rolls across the canvas as a result of the vicious impact while Stacy rises to spot Hellkat standing up in front of the ropes. She rushes right at her when Hellkat turns her side towards Raines and catches her with a back drop. Stacy is sent flipping over the cables and crashing to the outside mats with force.
Hellkat staggers backwards and falls against the turnbuckle for support while Jessica is regaining her composure. She looks up and sees her winded opposition therefore she bolts directly at her and jumps into the air for a big splash. Hellkat steps out of the way at the last second causing Jessica to collide sternum first with the corner. The impact causes her to bounce off and stagger backwards into the waiting hands of her adversary.
Hellkat spins her around and delivers a kick to her mid-section, doubling the Gothic Diva over then hooking both of her arms. She hoists Jessica into the air, holding her upside down as Evermore, who has regains his faculties, jumps from the apron to the top rope, springing off and flying across the ring. He comes down grabbing the bottom of Jessica’s bare feet and pushing her down into a spike piledriver.
Comeau: The spike piledriver from Evermore and Hellkat. That’s got to be enough to finish off the Raines sisters.
Moore: If not Hellkat will never get her bathroom break, but it’s okay, because I have kitty litter in my pockets.
A motionless Jessica tumbles to the canvas as Hellkat hooks her legs for the pinfall. Evermore stands over them, turning with fists clinched to stop anymore from breaking up the pin.
1
2
3
The fans erupt as Hellkat and Axl Evermore have just won this tag team encounter.
Comeau: Axl and Hellkat have done it, they are victorious here tonight. After being out of the ring for so many years Hellkat returns with a real vengeance.
Moore: Yay, the human feline won. All is right with the world.
Jessica lays on the canvas in pain while Conner Anderson shrugs his shoulders at ringside. Desolation stands up, clapping his hands together as he approaches the ring, rolling in under the ropes. An exhausted Evermore grabs Hellkat’s hand, assisting her to her feet after this intense tag team encounter. Desolation climbs to the apron, continuing to clap for his bride with a conniving grin on his face. Stacy stands up at ringside leaning against the apron and watching this, looking incredibly bitter over what she’s seeing.
Comeau: An unbelievable start to tonight’s Riot! what can we expect for the rest of the evening?
Susie: More wrestling?
Mark: That’s a safe bet.
Moore: Yay, I finally answered a question right, now the smarks will like me.
Hellkat continues to stand in the ring with both Evermore and Desolation clapping for her. If Ladder had hands it probably be clapping as well.
ON MY OWN
No, no, no, there’s nothing you can do about it, I HAVE to go out there by myself.
An alarmed Phantom follows behind his much shorter adoptive mother, Robin Brooks making her way towards the ring. In just a few moments she’ll collide with one of her most bitter rivals in the form of Too Magnificent, making her all the more determined and defiant.
Phantom: But Momma….
Robin Brooks: No buts mister.
She turns towards him, wagging her finger in a motherly manner. A rather conniving grin settles on her face though as she watches Phantom lower his head in despair.
Robin: You heard the statement on the website earlier this week, Dan Douglas barred you from ringside….
Phantom: To HELL with Dan Douglas, I’m not gonna let anyone hurt my Momma.
Brooks finds herself amused at the lengths Phantom is willing to go to in order to protect her. Gently she rubs one of his giant shoulders.
Brooks: What use would you be to me if you went and got yourself suspended?
These words come through her lips rather harshly. Suddenly it dawns on her how that must have sounded, quickly trying to sound more motherly.
Robin: I mean, the last thing I want is for my big special boy to get in trouble on my account. And watch your language, or I’ll wash your mouth out with soap.
Phantom: Sorry Ma.
She grins as warmly as possible.
Brooks: That’s alright sweety, I know how sad it must make you thinking about what could happen to me out there. And most of it probably is your fault because you won’t be there to protect me….
These words do absolutely nothing to placate Phantom’s dread, in fact, they exacerbate it. Clearly this is what Robin was counting on.
Brooks: But don’t you worry, because there’s a way you can make it up to me.
They stop right behind the curtains leading to the ring, Brooks repositioning her strap as she looks up into the long face of her son.
Phantom: REALLY?
He gets a tad excited.
Robin: THAT’S RIGHT. You may not be able to interfere in my match, but Dan didn’t say anything about Hurse’s match.
The excitement fades.
Brooks: I’m getting so sick of watching him lose every single week. His loses reflect poorly on me, so I want you to change that tonight.
Phantom: Oookay.
He rolls his eyes now that he’s forced to do this choir.
Robin: That’s my big helper.
Phantom: Hey Ma’, what about his proposal? Are you going to accept?
The thought causes Phantom to grow very anxious and fearful. Brooks blinks her eyes awkwardly, rubbing at the back of her head.
Brooks: I’m still thinking about it. But the last thing I’m going to do is marry a LOSER. If he starts winning I’ll think about it.
Phantom: GOOD. I don’t want anyone to take you away from me again.
Robin smiles although she doesn’t know what to make of that last comment.
Robin: Anyway mommy has to go take care of some business. You stay back here and be a good boy.
The behemoth sticks his arms out to his sides for a hug, Brooks giving him one to his delight. After several awkward moments of hugging Brooks breaks away and starts down the tunnel leading to the entry way. Phantom watches her leave before a plotting smirk settles over his face. Obviously he’s got something dastardly on his mind.
COMMERCIAL BREAK
Now Available on DVD
ROBIN BROOKS VS. TOO MAGNIFICENT
NO DISQUALIFCATION
Tell me exactly
Rah! Rah!
It doesn't really seem
Rah! Rah!
Is she not right?
You always wanted
Rah! Rah!
Is she not right?
Ramidi ma ma ba di ma!
Is she really telling lies again?
Eeeeeeeyow!
Is she not right?
The little bitch,
what am I supposed to do?
Now that I have
allowed you to beat me!
Do you think that
we could play another game?
Maybe I can win this time?
I kind of like
the misery you put me through.
Darling, you can trust me
completely.
If you even try
to look the other way,
I think that I could kill this time.
Rah! Rah!
I'm getting through to you.
Though I see you weeping so sweetly.
I think that you might
have to take another taste,
a little bit of hell this time.
Lie to me!
Rah! Rah!
Lie to me!
Is she insane?
Will she now run for her life
in the battle that ends this day?
Is she not right?!
Is she insane?!
Will she now run for her life
now that she LIED TO ME!
people to remember you.
You leave your little mark on
society!
Don't you know your wish
is coming true today?
Another victim dies tonight.
Lie to me!
Rah! Rah!
Lie to me!
Is she insane?
Will she now run for her life
in the battle that ends this day?
Is she not right?!
Is she insane?!
Will she now run for her life
now that she LIED TO ME!
Ramidi ma ma din do!
Ramidi ma ma ba di ma!
Ramidi ma ma ba di mo!
[all x3]
Doesn't she realize she's in danger?
Is she insane?
Will she now run for her life
in the battle that ends this day?
Is she not right?!
Is she insane?!
Will she now run for her life
now that she LIED TO ME!
she went and she told A LIE!
Now she will never tell another.
A LIE!
The little bitch,
she went and she told A LIE!
NEVER FUCKING LIE TO ME!
The curtains start to move and out runs the energetic yet egotistical Robin Brooks, many of the fans disgusted by her presence. The X-Class title is wrapped around her shoulder as she overlooks the fans with clear repulsion. She sighs upon hearing their reaction and seeing their gruesome faces then starts down the ramp. The quick and nimble Brooks slides in under the ropes, getting to her knees while continuing to examine her surroundings and not liking what she’s seeing.
Comeau: As you can see for the first time in weeks Robin Brooks isn’t flanked by her massive “son” Phantom.
Moore: Awww, I wanted to see Frankenberry again. He’s kind of hard to miss.
Mark: Yeah, well Robin is about to go at it on her own against the man who has been tormenting her for weeks in a match where there will be no rules, and no disqualifications.
Robin turns towards the entry way while throwing her belt to the official, bending forward with her hands on her knees, anxiously anticipating her opponent’s arrival. That’s when “Animal I’ve Become” by Three Days Grace starts to play, leading into another enraged reaction. Without delay Too Magnificent tears through the curtains and immediately starts storming towards the ring. His eyes are crazed and his features are tense as he makes a B-line for Brooks, the woman he is seemingly obsessed with destroying. He begins to climb the stairs while keeping a watchful gaze on the focused Black Widow.
Moore: Yay, it’s burly arms.
Mark: Too Magnificent making his way to the ring looking like a man possessed. He’s been trying to destroy Robin for weeks ever since his return as part of his crusade against the Alpha Generation. Will he accomplish his goal tonight?
Susie: This is great, we have burly arms versus a woman, this is win win for me.
The giant Too Magnificent steps over the ropes into the ring in a menacing manner when Robin rushes up to his side, lunging into the air with a dropkick. He feet connect with the brute’s shoulder, knocking him to the outside of the ring where he barely lands on his feet.
Brooks drops to the canvas then steps to the center of the ring as a fuming Magnificent turns back towards the ring. Just as he does this the Black Widow barrels across the squared circle, turning her back to the ropes then flipping over them in reverse with a modified moonsault. She comes crashing down right on top of a shocked Too Mag, both athletes crumbling to the mats amongst a loud ovation from the crowd.
Comeau: No holding back from Brooks, throwing her body directly at the giant Magnificent.
Moore: She sure is angry, all Mr. Biceps tried to do was cut her face with a pizza slicer. Is that so bad?
Mark: Uh, YEEEAH!
The crowd is continuing to scream as Brooks rolls away from Too Magnificent and climbs up onto the apron, balancing herself in preparation for her standing opposition. A stunned Golden Goliath forces himself to his feet then turns towards Brooks who rushes across the apron before launching herself off into a shooting star press. She crashers right into Too Mag, knocking the behemoth down in a heap. The fans cannot help themselves but to get to their feet screaming their heads off, going absolutely nuts over the sensational dive from the Black Widow.
Comeau: ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?!
Moore: Was I suppose to be telling a joke? I know a good one about a chicken and a road.
Mark: A shooting star press right off the apron into Too Mag!!
The gigantic Too Mag turns to a crawling base, trying to get away from the X-Class Champion who is retrieving a chair out from under the ring. The second Magnificent gets to his feet the chair is swung right between his shoulder blades. A groan emanates from the fans as the shot knocks his large frame towards the barricade, Brooks looking all fired up, actually enraged.
Too Magnificent slowly turns towards her when the chair is swung directly between his eyes, bashing him hard to the cranium. The sound of steel thunderously clashing against skull echoes throughout the arena. The big man is knocked from his feet, almost rendered unconscious from the chair shot as he tumbles to his seat, back propped up against the barricade.
Mark: Brooks really taking advantage of the lack of rules in this no disqualification match, getting some revenge on Too Magnificent for screwing her against Wheeler.
Moore: Ewww, you mean they did it on top of Jason? That’s perverse!
Comeau: Not a literal screw.
Susie: I’m so confused.
Too Magnificent remains propped up against the barricade, leaning spine first upon it when Brooks rushes towards him, lunging into the air with the chair stuck under her feet. She dropkicks the steel directly into his skull, sandwiching his cranium between chair and barricade.
A squeal is heard from the fans as Too Magnificent’s brain is almost smashed, causing his eyes to roll to the back of his head. Brooks rises to her feet and snatches hold of her opposition’s hair, forcing him slowly to his feet as he tries to keep his legs beneath him. They are wobbly as he stumbles towards the ring, rolling in under the ropes where he ends up on his back, laying there almost motionless.
Aggressively Robin scales the apron with the chair once again in her possession, on the brink of using it to inflict even more damage on Too Magnificent. That’s when to a chorus of boos Hurse comes strolling down the ramp with a proud smile on his face, clapping his hands in the process. Just as Brooks is about to enter the ring she stops and glares at her inbound boyfriend who is lavishing her with praise.
Comeau: Oh no, oh boy, here comes Hurse to ruin everything.
Moore: I thought Robin told him to stay away from her matches, just like my parents told me to stop sticking forks in toasters.
Mark: It looks like neither one of you got the message.
Hurse is still cheering for Robin, stopping at ringside and pointing towards Too Magnificent while at the same time motioning to her vacant ring finger with dejection. Robin begins to blow him off when Too Magnificent rushes across the ring and big boots the chair she is holding right into her face. The collision sends her flying backwards off the apron then turning as she crashes off the barricade across her sternum, eventually tumbling to the mats in a broken heap.
The crowd is grimacing while Too Magnificent staggers backwards to the center of the ring, still reeling from the earlier brutality that was inflicted on him in this encounter.
Moore: Oh no, that chair rammed into Robin’s face just like the numerous things that were rammed into mi….
Comeau: If you finish that sentence we’ll no longer have a shot at the PG rating Douglas is trying to get us.
Susie: Wow, I love PG shows, especially the one with the singing chipmunks.
A disorientated Too Magnificent turns towards Hurse on the outside, mouthing the words “thank you.” Hurse bites his lower lip bitterly while a battered Robin staggers towards the ring, falling against the apron. That’s when Too Mag reaches through the cables, grabbing her hair then pulling her up onto the apron. He slides her almost all the way through the cables only for her ankles to be draped over the middle cable, Too Magnificent placing her in a front chancery then dropping back into an elevated DDT. The top of the Black Widow’s cranium collides brutally with the canvas, causing her to writhe in anguish as she rolls onto her back.
Too Magnificent sluggishly crawls into the cover, still feeling the effects of the way this no DQ match commenced. He hooks her leg with determination.
1
2
Brooks launches her shoulder from the ring and stays off defeat for the time being. The grumpy Too Mag rises to his feet as a result and begins to stomp at her sternum repeatedly, then takes her around the jaw, rolling her to a kneeling base. His huge forearm clubs her over the back, knocking her all the way down to the canvas yet again before he snatches hold of her hair, leading her to a standing base once more. Once she’s upright Too Magnificent wraps his arms around her waist, dropping back into a release over head belly to belly suplex that sends her crashing viciously into the ring.
Moore: Robin is being thrown around like a….a….Mitsubishi!
Comeau: That might actually be a good analogy if it weren’t entirely retarded.
The now dominating Too Magnificent stands up and glares at Hurse on the outside of the ring again. Briefly giving him an up yours before returning his focus to his damaged opponent, Robin valiantly trying to stand up. Just as she rolls to her knees Too Magnificent hooks both of her arms, dragging her to her feet for a double underhook suplex. That’s when Brooks spins free, twisting her body and delivering a spinning back heel kick directly to his ribs. The giant is doubled over as Brooks now gets her second wind and rushes into the ropes in front of him.
She springs to the middle cable and then takes flight, spinning around for a buzzsaw kick to Too Mag’s face. He ducks forward at the last second, avoiding the springboard kick as Robin flies over his head and drops to the canvas, rolling across it to her feet. Surprisingly she shows no hesitation as she rushes right at Too Magnificent who side steps her, getting behind her back then catching her arm and dropping in reverse with a release half nelson suplex. Brooks is flipped completely over, crashing hard to her face and sternum.
Mark: Argh, Robin turned inside out with a half nelson suplex.
Moore: She was thrown like a…a….panda.
Comeau: Just stop, your only getting progressively worse.
Too Magnificent stands and again beams a spiteful glare towards Hurse at ringside, smiling as he approaches the ropes. He slips through them to the outside of the ring, opposite the side Hurse is standing on, now reaching under the squared circle.
Too Magnificent: Now she’s going to get a taste of what Too Magnificent is ALL ABOUT!
The brute reaches under the tarp hanging from the apron.
Too Mag: Prepare for the trashcan.
He chuckles with demonic glee while reaching for the object he had stashed under the ring hoping to withdrawal a trashcan only to pull out a giant pink dildo. For a moment he doesn’t even realize what he’s holding before glancing down at the object in his palms, squealing as he drops it and jumps back, palms raised. The crowd is laughing at the sight of the object laying on the mats.
Mark: What the hell? Someone has pranked Too Magnificent here by replacing his trusty trashcan with a giant dildo. There goes that PG rating for sure.
Moore: That looks just like my last date.
Too Magnificent may be disgusted as he kicks the item he just pulled from under the ring and now rolls under the ropes, approaching battered Brooks. He forces her up to her feet then whips her off into the ropes, which she bounces off of and then comes back in at her waiting opposition. Too Magnificent catches her against the sternum and the stomach, throwing her up high into the air then stepping out of the way. Brooks comes down from a tremendous height and splats across the canvas thanks to a modified military press throw.
She pushes herself up with her palms, reaching for her sternum in pain while Magnificent steps towards her, placing his kneepad to the side of her face then scraping it across her lovely skin. Hurse is growing more and more enraged on the outside of the ring as he watches this travesty.
Too Magnificent takes Robin by her long, lovely locks and slowly drags her to her feet, pulling her head into his armpit as he signals for the Midas Touch to screams from the crowd. That’s when Brooks frees herself, spinning out of the front chancery then jumping into the air for the dropkick.
Too Mag side steps her feet and swats her down out of the air, sending her crashing into the canvas. She just stats to push herself back to her knees when Too Mag charges in and drills her hard to the cranium with a running knee strike. The blow knocks Brooks back down to the canvas, her massive opponent gingerly stepping towards the cables with a carefree swagger in his step.
Comeau: More shots to the face and cranium of Brooks, it’s almost as if Too Magnificent is intent on disfiguring her.
Moore: At least I’ll look nicer by comparison.
Brooks is in a great deal of pain as she rubs at her face and slowly crawls with desperation into the cables, seizing hold of them. The brutish Too Mag steps up behind her and delivers another clubbing blow that lands directly between her shoulder blades, knocking her down hard to a kneeling base once again. He snatches hold of a lock of her hair and slowly drags her to a full upright base then pulls her head down over backwards into a reverse DDT position. The big man reaches out and grabs her by the tights, lifting her up high into the air in a reverse suplex position.
Somehow Robin is able to float over his shoulder though and land on her feet directly behind him. She delivers a quick kick to the back of his thigh, then jumps into the air and dropkicks him to the crease of his knee. The big man tumbles to a kneeling base as Brooks rushes up behind him and jumps into the air, flipping over his head. In the process she catches both of his arms and drags him down into a flip over unprettier. His face collides violently with the canvas as Hurse begins to clap with a huge smirk on his face.
Comeau: Brooks mounting a comeback, hitting an unprettier variation!
Moore: An unprettier on Too Mag? I didn’t think his face could get anymore hideous.
Mark: I thought you had some kind of weird, disgusting infatuation with him.
Susie: Just his arms.
Too Magnificent rolls around on the ring cupping his hands over his nose before finally reaching his knees. Although aching in pain herself Brooks bounces off the ropes and comes charging back in at her kneeling opponent, lunging at him feet first with a front dropkick. It nails him directly under the jaw, knocking Too Mag to his spine as Brooks sits up at his side, taking several deep breaths. The damaged Magnificent starts to get to his feet when Brooks stands and rushes into the ropes beside him. She jumps into the air, springing off the second cable then twisting as she flies towards her huge opponent who suddenly reaches out and catches her by the throat.
Moore: This could be bad for Brookey!
Comeau: Obviously. Too Magnificent has her set for the chokeslam.
Brooks lands on her feet as Too Mag places his massive palm to her lower back, preparing to chokeslam the damsel viciously to the canvas below. He lifts her up into the air when Hurse swings a steel chair hard into his back, causing Too Magnificent to drop Brooks to her feet.
Moore: Hurse coming to Robin’s aid like her knight in shinning silver-wear!
Comeau: No time to correct you now because the Alpha Generation is once again abusing this no disqualification rule.
Saliva drips from both corners of Too Mag’s mouth as his rage consumed frame slowly turns towards Hurse who is suddenly regretting getting himself physically involved in this contest. He rushes forward with the chair lifted into the air yet again when Too Magnificent delivers a straight punch to the steel, knocking it backwards right into Hurse’s face. The collision is devastating as Hurse falls to the ring then rolls out of it, Too Magnificent turning towards an inbound Brooks.
He places his hands to her chest and stomach, throwing her up high into the air for another tossing military press when Robin turns and lands directly on top of his shoulder. She snaps back, flipping Too Mag over into a hurricarana. The big man crashes hard into the ring across his upper back but promptly rolls to his feet. As soon as he stands up he rushes at the rising Brooks for a big boot. She drops down under it into a forward roll, ending up on her feet behind the big man and snatching the chair off of the canvas in the process.
An enraged Too Magnificent spins around when the chair is tossed to him, the Golden Goliath catching it in front of his face instinctively. This allows Brooks the opportunity to lunge into the air and deliver an absolutely stiff spinning heel kick right into the chair, causing it to slam with great force into Too Mag’s face. The big man slowly falls to his back as Brooks crawls into the cover.
Comeau: Van Daminator by Brooks! Will she finally get her revenge?
Moore: This is just like a Lifetime movie where the women scorned gets her retribution. But where’s Valerie Bertinelli?
Too Magnificent is completely sprawled out across his back as Brooks crawls into the cover, hooking his massive leg for the three count.
1
2
3
Some of the fans erupt into cheers and others staunchly boo Brooks as she has just obtained her retribution on the giant who has plagued her career for the past few months. She sits up celebrating, her arms raised aloft with victory. On the outside of the ring Hurse has gotten to his feet, rubbing his forehead in between clapping for the woman who will hopefully become his fiancée.
Comeau: And Brooks picks up the victory, finally defeating this Neanderthal Too Magnificent.
Moore: That’s right, you go girl.
Mark: The only place you should “go” is the unemployment line.
A dazed Hurse climbs up onto the apron, clapping for Brooks who sits exasperated on the canvas. All the while a defeated and humbled Too Mag rolls under the ropes to the outside of the ring where he tumbles to his knees, looking positively dreary in his disorientated condition.
Mark: Robin with some vindication here tonight surprisingly even with Hurse at ringside.
Moore: Aww that’s sweet, he didn’t hit her in the head with something this time.
AN ANSWER
After several agonizing minutes Brooks gets to her feet, Hurse eagerly sliding through the ropes beside her then requesting the use of a microphone. One is handed to him by the overworked Kailey Worf as he steps towards the exhausted Brooks, who is yet unaware of his presence.
Moore: Now Hurse has something to say, I hope he’ll bring out another singing telegram.
Comeau: When doesn’t Hurse have something to say? The guy never stops talking, even while sleeping and eating.
Susie: Gross.
When Hurse steps within a few inches of the exhausted Black Widow her head rises to acknowledge his presence. Her eyes are heavy with emotion at the sight of the Master of Control who is still lavishing her with praise.
Hurse: WOW Robin WOW! That was awe inspiring.
Brooks rolls her eyes upon hearing this as Hurse continues to awkwardly clap his hands around the microphone.
Hurse: I haven’t seen anything that impressive since Orlando Cruze’s third nipple. Your victory against Too Magnificent is truly a cause for celebration.
This claim leaves Brooks dumbfounded, not really seeing her victory over Too Mag as that HUGE of an accomplishment.
Hurse: But I’ll tell you what would make this moment all the more special, if you gave me an answer to the question I asked last week.
Brooks suddenly looks like a deer caught in the headlights, her eyes opened wide as saucers.
Hurse: I understand you’ve been busy all week preparing for this match, hiring bodybuilders to push Phantom on the swing set, and shaving your legs, but now that this match is over there shouldn’t be any further delay. So PLEASE, gummyworm, will you make yourself the happiest woman in the universe and marry me?
Longingly he gazes into her eyes, which remain ripe with emotional instability. She tilts her head back and forth weighing her options as Hurse hovers around her anxiously.
Hurse: COME ON….I’d get down on my knees again but they didn’t clean the ring after Jason Wheeler competed in it last week. What do you say, Mrs. Parkwood?
The grin that stretches across his face only leaves Brooks all the more doubtful. She nervously brushes her hair behind her ear and looks out onto the crowd which has started a chant.
Fans: JUST SAY NO, JUST SAY NO, JUST SAY NO!
Hurse has his finger over his lips, insisting that the fans shush but no one is listening. A very conflicted Brooks continues to think before she looks up into Hurse’s eyes, the former World Champion getting very excited. That’s when she looks down at the canvas rather sadly and approaches the ropes, sliding through them onto the apron. She drops down to the outside mats without even looking back at her boyfriend, marching up the ramp and leaving him behind.
Comeau: I think that was a “no.”
Susie: This is the saddest thing I’ve seen since Tori Spelling’s face.
Brooks walks up the ramp depressingly towards the back while Hurse watches her leave, arms thrust out to his sides. Despair clings to the ghost white features of the former World Champion, who looks on the verge of tears considering that Robin has yet to give him an answer. His eyes shift back and forth, noticing that some of the fans are laughing at his misfortune, causing him to swallow hard and play it off. Brooks vanishes through the curtains as Hurse tries his best to cover for such a humiliation.
Hurse: Hahahaha, Robin, you little scamp you.
He dismissively waves her off with his palm.
Hurse: Oh how she likes to play with my head. I’m sure she had to rush backstage because you know, she had a bad burrito or something. Rest assure though, she will say “yes” and we will…….
“OUTSIDER” hits the PA system, sending everyone into a rage. Hurse’s eyes snap towards the entry way, his lower lip quivering as he hears the entrance lyrics of the man he tried so hard to lure into the Alpha Generation.
Mark: Things just got worse for Hurse.
Moore: Why, does he have to watch Troll 2?
The curtains part and through them strolls Pat Evans, holding a medium sized box over one hand with a little pink bow attached to it. The Submission title glistens over his shoulder and a very sympathetic expression is present on his face as he moves towards the ring. Hurse grows increasingly bitter with every step Evans takes towards him, especially as he climbs onto the apron then slips through the ropes, revealing a microphone to be present in his other hand.
Mark: This is a combustible situation, especially after Evans attacked Hurse last week.
Moore: Yeah…wait, what happened last week? Did Evans cheat at charades?
Hurse immediately steps towards Evans, who holds out his present defensively.
Pat Evans: Whoa, whoa, whoa…calm down there slugger.
Strangely the vengeful Hurse complies, backing down at Evans’ request.
Evans: There’s no need for such hostility, I didn’t come down here to pick up where I left off last week.
Hurse grows increasingly bitter as he’s forced to recall the beat-down from the last Riot! A smirking Evans continues.
Pat: And I understand that his may be poor timing on my part, but I just wanted to bring you a little pre-wedding gift. Of course I see now that it was a waste of money considering Robin completely spit in the face of your affections.
Each word delivered makes the Master of Control lose control.
Evans: Honestly though Steven, there’s no reason to feel bad that you made me waste cash, it’s my own fault. I should have realized that Robin would come to her senses just like I and everyone else did. It should have been obvious to me that no rational thinking person would DARE suffer your company let alone stand to marry you.
Hurse lowers his head, dread again overtaking him much to Pat’s delight.
Evans: Come on Stevie, the thought of anyone loving you is ridiculous. Even your own parents didn’t love you enough to tell you the truth, instead they let you live a lie by thinking your father was a “good man.” In actuality he was out pleasuring anything with a pulse. And sadly for you the acorn fell far, FAR, from the tree, because you can’t even keep Robin happy.
This insufferable tirade has Hurse at the point of implosion as the smirking Pat sustains himself through his former associate’s misery.
Pat: But HEY, even though this whole proposal blew up in your face, and reconfirmed the fact that nobody likes you let alone loves you, it doesn’t mean you can’t accept my gift. You’ll like it, it’ll brighten your spirits, as it’s a gift straight from the heart.
The box is held out as Hurse examines it cautiously. He doesn’t know why but he feels the urge to reach out and untie the bow wrapped around it.
Evans: There you go champ…
A cautious Hurse removes the top of the box and looks inside, finding absolutely nothing but a clinched fist. Suddenly Evans’ hand flies up through a hole in the bottom of the box slugging Hurse right to the jaw.
Susie: DIANE ROSS!
Comeau: Evans just slugged Hurse right in the face, the only thing that box was holding was his fist.
Moore: I hope Evans doesn’t end up being my secret Santa this year.
The shot knocks Hurse down hard to the canvas with the crowd screaming, Pat breaking his arm free from the box.
Pat: But WAIT, there’s more.
He reaches into his pocket and begins to remove the chain to squeals from the sold out audience. The diabolical Evans begins to wrap the chain around his fist while Hurse crawls desperately away from him, really knocked loopy from that right hand. Pat storms towards him and grabs his shoulder, pulling Hurse up when he reveals that he’s holding the steel chair that came into play earlier. He turns and swings the top edge right into Evans’ ribs, doubling him over.
Comeau: Hurse has got a CHAIR!
Pat wraps his arms around his gut as Hurse stands up at his side and in an absolute rage swings the steel down right over his back. The chair crashes over Evans’ back, knocking him forward as he spills through the ropes to the outside of the ring. Hurse rolls out after him, not letting Pat get away, taking all his frustrations out on the man who turned down his offer to join the AG.
Mark: Hurse has snapped!
An agonizing Pat turns only to have the chair swung into his skull this time, the steel bouncing hard from his cranium. He staggers up the ramp towards the backstage area, somehow maintaining his footing when he’s slapped in the back with the chair yet again. Finally he drops to his knees as Hurse lifts the chair high above his head, ready to inflict more damage only for security personal dressed in full riot gear to stop him. They create a human barrier between Hurse and Evans, the Master of Control incoherently trying to push his way past them only to be held at bay.
Moore: A bunch of Darth Vaders protecting Evans, I knew he was in league with the dark side.
Comeau: No, that’s Douglas’ private security force.
The riot gear clad guards continue to push Hurse back as he tries and tries again to jump over their shoulders to get his hands on an aching Evans. Pat slides up the ramp across his seat, looking furious over what just happened before a hand goes down on his shoulder. The hand belongs to a smiling Dan Douglas who grips a microphone in his opposite palm.
Dan Douglas: My oh my, you’re a bit testy this evening, aren’t you Hurse?
The furious Hurse tries to get free from the guards so that he can continue to unload on Evans, yet they have a tight grasp on him.
Dan: I tell you what, if you want to get out all these frustrations why don’t I go ahead and start your match right now. There you go, will that make you happy?
Hurse begins to calm as he hears this news.
Douglas: After the break, it’s going to be Hurse versus David Freak. SECURITY, get him into the ring!
He points towards the squared circle as Hurse is forced backwards towards the squared circle. Evans holds his forehead while standing, his eyes meeting with Hurse’s, the two wanting to absolutely kill each other it seems.
Comeau: Douglas making it official, David Freak versus Hurse after the break.
Susie: Yay…I think.
COMMERCIAL BREAK
IWC…..at least here are no botched bulldogs
DAVID FREAK VS. HURSE
The show comes back to the ring with a particularly angry Hurse storming back and forth in the ring in preparation for his bout against David Freak.
Comeau: We’re back here live on Riot! with former World Champion Hurse still in the ring waiting for David Freak. I don’t recall a time where I’ve ever seen Hurse this intense.
Moore: He hit Evans with a chair a whole bunch, that must mean he’s angry.
Mark: How much glue have you sniffed in your lifetime?
Susie: Sniffed? Why do you put it in the past tense?
The arena goes black as a lone piano performance roars over the PA. Purple and blue lights flick on as blue and gold metalic shavings of confetti fall from the rafters. The lights dim as the piano nears it's end. The lights are out once more, leaving the arena in complete darkness before a roaring explosion on the stage accompanied by the roaring guitar of "Spirit of the Underdog" silhouettes David Freak. He stands in the on the stage looking out to the crowd, nodding slowly at the oncoming cheers and jeers from the crowd.
"Seen you round, I know your face.
Watched you try to grow up with grace.
Seen that heart out on your sleeve.
Like it's so much life you're dying to feel
Dying to feel"
Freak throws his arms up into the air as he cockily spins around as he makes his way down the ramp. He stops every few steps or so to flirt with a lady fan or to raise a hand to a booing male spectator.
"Cause if you've got to steal, you've got to steal the show
It's the spirit of the underdog
And if you've got to break, you've got to break the mold
It's the spirit of the underdog"
Freak struts his way down the rest of the ramp showing off in any way he possibly can. He reaches the ring side and grabs onto the ropes to pull himself up before quickly turning and raising his arms to the air again. More cheers and jeers fly in his direction before he slides in under the bottom rope. He paces around the center of the ring with his arms spread wide accepting the last wave of chanting and swearing from the crowd. Hurse scowls in his direction, actually eager to compete for once instead of fleeing from a battle.
Susie: Freaky is here, without his wife, I wonder she is. I’d never go anywhere without my husband, if I had a husband. Want to be my husband Billy?
Comeau: Considering that you can’t even remember my first name, no, no I don’t.
Moore: Awww.
Mark: David Freak is out to pick up where he left off last week in that heated tag match where he took a chair to Phantom’s skull, causing the bout to be thrown out. We could see the same result tonight with emotions running so high.
A concerned expression resides on Hurse’s face as the Extraordinary Champion tentatively steps out of the corner, extending his hand outward in the direction of his opponent. Freak tilts his head observing the palm, reaching down and grabbing his opponent’s wrist instead. The former World Champion’s hand is turned and twisted, Freak examining it from every perspective while Hurse’s eyes uneasily shift back and forth.
Comeau: Um, Freak dramatizing this whole handshake.
Moore: Maybe he’s making sure Hurse didn’t pick his nose first.
David finally turns the hand so that the palm is aimed upwards towards his face, disgust setting into his features. His finger points out something abnormal on the Master of Control’s palm. Rage overwhelms Hurse as he anxiously glares down at his skin.
Hurse: WHAT!?! I washed this hand for twenty minutes, with Dove, DOVE!
His face hovers over his palm before David slaps the hand of his hand, launching it upward right into the nose of the Alpha Generation member. The crowd begins to laugh as Hurse steps back, having been slapped by his own palm.
Comeau: Hurse fell for that classic gag.
Moore: What gag? What’s on Hurse’s palm? I hope it’s not gum.
Mark: Forget it.
An outraged Hurse regains his composure for a moment then steps forward throwing a right hand. David side steps it, catching the inbound fist of his opponent and then swinging around under his forearm placing him in an arm ringer. Freak glances towards the screaming fans with a shrug of his shoulders and an arrogant smile on his face.
The irritated, almost irrational Hurse drops into a forward roll in order to escape the arm ringer. However, David breaks the submission and drops down behind his opposition, clamping his arms around his neck in a sleeper hold. Confidence swells in Freak as he seems to be out technical wrestling Hurse, who in a rage tries to get to his feet. He stands up with all air being deprived to his head thanks to his opponent but then reaches back with his legs, wrapping them around Freak’s ankle. He twists his body so that David is hit with a drop toe hold, forced to break the sleeper.
Comeau: Hurse finally countering out of Freak’s submission. This may be his only chance of getting in some offense.
Moore: All the Dove soap in the world hasn’t been able to save him thus far, and I love Dove soap.
Hurse lunges across the ring and grabs Freak’s bicep, lifting it up into an arm lock. Much to the Master of Control’s dismay Freak pushes himself up onto his side and reaches out with his legs, wrapping them around his neck. Hurse is pulled down into a head scissors submission, David clamping his legs around his neck with all his strength. Almost as soon as the hold is locked in Hurse twists his body, rolling across the canvas so that his body forms a straight line with the seated Freak’s. He is in a kneeling base as he pushes down on the knees of Freak, freeing his head from the submission. Hurse grabs David around the ankles and rolls him over onto his stomach, placing him in an Inverted Indian Death lock.
One of Freak’s legs are crossed in front of the other one, Hurse pulling forward on it to apply as much pressure as possible. He then slides across the canvas to David’s side, locking his arms around his neck in a side headlock.
Hurse: My palms are immaculate you deceitful whore!
David begins to push himself up to his feet, reaching out with his arms and wrapping them around Hurse’s neck. He frees himself from the side headlock but giving his opposition a snapmare over onto the canvas. Hurse comes down to his seat as Freak slides up behind him and re-applies the sleeper.
Comeau: These two repeatedly going for submissions with Freak surprisingly getting the edge.
Moore: Edge? I love that guy, especially when he sings with that Puddle of Mud band.
Mark: I’d correct you, but I really don’t care anymore.
Hurse’s head is tightly squeezed while he begins to force himself to his feet yet again. This time he counters by elbowing Freak to the ribs then slipping free, stepping behind his opponent. He wedges his hands to David’s spine then shoves him forward into the cables, Freak bouncing off the ropes then launching himself across the ring. To a loud reception David connects with a flying shoulder block right to Hurse’s sternum, both men collapsing to the canvas.
Mark: Diving shoulder tackle by Freak.
Moore: HEY! He ripped that move off of John Cena! Oh how I adore Cena’s large bosoms.
After connecting with the move David stands up and watches Hurse roll to his feet. The Alpha Generation member looks incredibly dazed as Freak steps in blasting him hard to the jaw with a closed fist. He then chops him extremely stiff across his sternum, almost ripping off one of his nipples. The chop almost caves in his chest while Freak steps around behind him, again locking in the sleeper out of the blue. This time Hurse wedges his back to David’s sternum and pushes him backwards into the turnbuckle. David is rammed spine first into the corner yet quickly pulls himself up onto it as Hurse staggers forward, unaware of his opponent’s positioning. Before he can even turn around Freak jumps off the turnbuckle and blasts him to the back of the head with a flying forearm strike.
Moore: GRAVY!
Comeau: Hurse completely unable to get out of the blocks in this match, David just beating him from pillar to post. Maybe he’s still bitter over what Pat Evans had to say before this match commenced.
The hard strike to the skull sends Hurse rolling forward across the ring and under the cables to the outside. He drops down to the outside mats while David keeps after him, refusing to let his opposition get even a second to recuperate. Freak slips through the ropes onto the apron just as Hurse begins to turn back towards the ring, looking up in time to spot his adversary flying off the apron with extended legs for a hurricarana. To Freak’s shock his legs are caught though, causing him to drop onto his back as Hurse now rolls him onto his stomach and steps over his spine, applying the Legend Lock (Reverse Liontamer).
Comeau: The Legend Lock established by Hurse! But he can’t get the submission on the outside of the ring.
Moore: Why? That’s not fair, I protest. Will you help me make protest signs?
Mark: No.
Susie: Good, because I already forgot what I was going to protest.
The referee sticks his head through the ropes, starting a ten count as Hurse continues to rip at his opponent with this submission. Freak is roaring in pain as his back is bent at an awkward angle, Hurse barely able to hear the official’s count over these wails of pain. As soon as the official shouts “eight,” the submission is broken and the former World Champion rolls into the ring.
Although his lower back is killing him, David starts to stand up, turning towards the ring as Hurse barrels across it, diving through the ropes with a suicide headbunt. The strike knocks Freak backwards into the barricade, hitting it hard spine first while Hurse shockingly lands on his feet upon completing the move.
Mark: Nice dive from Hurse, I guess he’s finally gotten his head off of Pat Evans.
Moore: As he throws it at David Freaky. Yay, I’m calling the action just like a real announcer.
The headbunt has left Freak rather disorientated as he’s taken by the back of the head and rolled into the ring. He ends up spread across his spine, as Hurse stands up on the apron then pulls himself over the top cable, twisting his body so that he comes down with a double stomp. His boots connect with nothing but canvas though, David rolling out of the way at the last second. He begins to stand up and charge at Hurse who grabs the top rope, pulling himself up feet first onto the second cable and springing into a backwards flip. He flies right over top of David and lands on his feet behind his back. Freak continues into the cables, bouncing off then coming back in at Hurse who just landed in time to catch his opponent with a release over head belly to belly suplex. After hitting the belly to belly Hurse nips up acrobatically to his feet, looking much more intense than he ever has before.
Comeau: Wow, I’m shocked that actually panned out for Hurse, usually nothing does. The guy can’t even sign into his e-mail account without breaking something.
Moore: I have the exact same problem, all I get is a black screen.
Mark: Did you plug the computer in?
Susie: Ohhhh, good idea.
David appears stunned by his opposition’s quick moves, unable to believe that he’s no longer dominating this contest, especially against Hurse. He sluggishly starts to stand up while Hurse turns and lunges into the air, dropkicking him hard to the sternum, taking him right back down to the canvas. David rolls across the canvas, trying to stand up and create some space between himself and his shockingly aggressive opposition. He now rushes back towards Hurse who catches Freak with an atomic drop, planting David testicles first right on top of his knee.
Freak jumps back, grabbing at his testicles only for Hurse to take hold of his wrist, pulling him forward into his shoulders. The Master of Control stands up holding David in a fireman’s carry position before pushing him over into a lung blower. Hurse drops onto his back with raised knees as Freak crashes down ribs first right into them. He stands up after the impact albeit doubled over, clutching his mid-section and his testicles while Hurse pompously rushes into the ropes in front of him. He bounces off and comes back in at David, lunging forward into a spear.
It appears that Hurse has connected with the spear only to have Freak catch him around the neck, dropping to his back and rolling in reverse. Freak rolls backwards to his feet pulling Hurse with him then lifting his opposition into the air with an implant DDT.
Mark: Rolling implant DDT by Freak, countering Hurse’s spear and putting an end to his offensive comeback.
Moore: Oh, but I LOVE comebacks, especially the sappy emotional kind.
An aching David rolls into the cover, hoping his desperation counter was enough to ensure victory.
1
2
Hurse launches his shoulder from the ring, avoiding the three count just barely. His eyes are glazed over from that drop on his head while he slowly begins to roll to a crawling base. In pain David moves towards him and begins to drive his knees into the top of Hurse’s head over and over again, delivering devastatingly stiff shots. These deadly knees disorientate the Master of Control as he begins to rise to his feet. David takes him around the jaw, leading him up and then grabbing his wrist. Before Hurse can do anything he’s dragged forward into a hard short arm clothesline. The lariat almost beheads the former World Champion as he tumbles to the canvas.
David spins around and drops to his knees behind Hurse, pulling him up to his seat and locking in the sleeper yet again.
Comeau: Another sleeper established by Freak, who has become as aggressive as Hurse the longer this contest continues.
Moore: Both of these guys need to sit down, eat some donuts and watch some Power Rangers, that always mellows me out.
The Master of Control’s face has become a bright shade of red as he agonizingly tries to force himself to his feet even after all these blows to the cranium from his opposition. David grits his teeth and attempts to exert further punishment as Hurse gets to his feet, trying to find a way to counter. He lifts his hand into the air, forcing it between David’s forearms and beginning to push them away from his throat. As soon as David realizes his hold is being broke he headbunts Hurse to the back of the cranium, doubling him over forward. Freak then buries his shoulder to his adversary’s spine, lifting him up into the air for a back drop when Hurse floats over.
He lands gracefully behind David’s back then charges forward, catching him by the back of the head for a facebuster. David pushes him off however, sending Hurse rushing into the cables then bouncing off of them. As he comes back towards his opposition, Freak barrels towards him for the clothesline from hell. Hurse ducks into a forward roll under his opponent’s arm to David’s shock. Freak spins around when Hurse steps towards him, wrapping his arm around his neck then charging at one of the turnbuckles to connect with the sit-out sliced bread number 2.
Comeau: Hurse going for the Disinfectant.
Moore: Good, I need to scrub my bathroom floor.
Mark: He’s not literally going for Dis…ah to hell with it.
Hurse pulls a stunned Freak along with him as he steps up the turnbuckle, flipping over backwards. However, David grabs the top rope with both hands, clinging to it for dear life as Hurse lands on his feet right behind him. Freak successfully blocked the Disinfectant as he turns around wedging his back to the turnbuckle, shocked to see Hurse already barreling towards him. He jumps into the air, placing his feet to Freak’s ribs for a money flip only to be pushed off into a backwards flip. Somehow Hurse lands on his feet albeit stooped over and rushes forward at Freak who steps out of the corner nailing the clothesline from hell. Hurse is almost flipped over completely by the lariat, David landing at his side looking exhausted by this fast paced action.
Comeau: Hurse just starting to build some momentum and he’s cut off yet again.
Moore: If anything was CUT OFF it was his head. AHAHAHAHA!
Mark: I find Dilbert more humorous than that last comment.
Freak crawls into the cover as the crowd screams, hooking Hurse’s leg for the three count.
1
2
Hurse drapes his other foot over the botto rope, forcing the referee to stop his count. The official stands up and informs a surprised David that Hurse got his leg on the bottom rope.
Comeau: The clothesline from hell may have spelled Hurse’s end if he hadn’t been so close to the ropes, what an opportunist.
David reaches his feet and grabs Hurse by the wrist, dragging him away from the ropes then stepping over him as he approaches the turnbuckle. He steps up it to the top rope then launches himself off into a twisting phoenix splash, crashing down right on top of Hurse, knocking all the air from his body. The crowd reacts with thunderous applause as David hooks Hurse’s legs for the three count.
Comeau: Phoenix Splash by Freak, who looks to be on the verge of victory!
Moore: He spun through that air like a tornado, and I’m frightened of tornados, ever since the Wizard of Oz.
The referee drops down to make the deciding count with the crowd buzzing over what should be a big upset.
1
2
Hurse launches his shoulder from the ring right before the three count. A stunned Freak rises to his knees, his eyes bulging from their sockets and his chest heaving with deep breaths.
Mark: Hurse barely kicks out again after another of Freak’s incredible high risk moves.
Moore: How many times is Hurse going to kick out? I have a hair removal appointment after tonight’s show that I can’t miss.
Comeau: I don’t any of us want you to miss that appointment Susie.
David sluggishly rises to his feet, looking winded by this contest while the crowd starts to boo at the sight of a crouched Phantom discreetly making his way towards the ring. He tries to hide from the competitors in the squared circle as he stops at ringside, reaching down and grabbing the dented up chair that has come in handy throughout the night from the outside mats.
Susie: It’s Frankenberry at ringside.
Comeau: Phantom is out here and he’s got hold of that chair, I guess he’s acting on orders of Robin Brooks, his so called mother.
Freak grabs Hurse by his hair, dragging him up to his feet in his almost lifeless condition, making sure he’s standing before rushing into the ropes in front of him. He bounces off, coming back in for the clothesline from hell. Freak swings his arm at Hurse who ducks it and hooks it all at once, lifting his legs into the air for a crucifix pin. At least that’s what it appeared he was going for, but instead he swings his legs up and over David’s shoulders as well as his head. His heel accidentally connects with the eye of the official who was standing too close to the action, causing him to turn away in pain. Hurse lands on his feet right in front of Freak and boots him to the ribs, doubling him over and placing his head under his seat for the Sanitizer (Styles Clash).
Mark: Huge reversal into the Sanitizer.
At the last second David pushes Hurse off, sending him staggering backwards into the ropes, falling against them. Freak charges directly at him as Phantom stands up on the outside, swinging the chair right at Hurse’s back. The Master of Control steps out of the way as Freak ends up sticking his head through the cables and receiving a thunderous chair shot right between the eyes. Screams emanate from the fans as a very dazed David staggers backwards, Hurse catching him with a school boy from behind.
Comeau: OHHH! It looks like Phantom was aiming for Hurse but he just hit Freak right in the head with that chair. This is just like what happened last week.
Moore: Someone has to put that chair in a Hannibal Lecter mask, it has been far too destructive tonight.
Phantom steps back a bit stunned over his actions, dropping the chair as he realizes he accidentally helped Hurse and at the same time got a measure of revenge for what Freak did to him on the last Riot! The official rubs at his eye as he turns back towards the action, spotting the pin and dropping down to make the count.
1
2
3
Every fan in attendance is booing what they just witnessed as Hurse falls to the canvas, having picked up a miraculous win with the unexpected assistance of Phantom.
Comeau: It looks like Hurse has finally broken his losing streak thanks to Phantom of all people.
Moore: Don’t forget the chair, the chair deserves credit to. You’ll make it as emo as Trashcan if you don’t congratulate it.
An aching Hurse pushes himself up onto his elbows and glares at Phantom, a smile sweeping across his face.
Hurse: SON!
He stretches out his arms for a hug while a bitter Phantom shakes his head and starts up the ramp.
Mark: Phantom not taking kindly to the thought of Hurse becoming his stepfather apparently, which may have motivated him to make sure Hurse lost tonight.
Susie: But Frankenberry failed sadly.
Comeau: Would you stop with the Frankenberry shit, it’s not even funny.
A dejected Phantom starts up the ramp not even looking back at the ring as he mumbles obscenities under his breath. Hurse celebrates his undeserved victory while Freak tries to recover from that vicious chair shot in the ring.
TECHNICALITIES
Shadows resonate around Riggs who seems to be wrapping dark tape around his wrists and fists for the impending four way. It doesn’t appear to bother him that he’s technically headed into a 3 on 1 handicap encounter as he bites the end of the tape, flattening it across the surface of his pale skin. He continues to adorn his body in battle gear while seated in the darkness of a boiler-room considering that Dan Douglas fails to give anyone he doesn’t like proper dressing rooms.
His mental preparation for the trying contest ahead is ruined when a bullhorn blows directly beside his head, almost popping his eardrums. As soon as it sounds Jason Wheeler hops into the frame, lowering his head excitedly towards Riggs who remains emotionally detached.
Riggs: Yeeeessss?
An awkward expression befalls Wheeler’s face as he begins to shake the bullhorn and examine it, wondering why it elicited absolutely no response from his associate.
Riggs: What was that all about?
He digs his finger into his ear, trying to stop the ringing sound.
Jason Wheeler: Oh, I was just trying to jolt your system.
His entire body shakes to visually represent what he’s talking about.
Jason: I wanted to make you less glum chum, to wake you up and get you all energetic. And nothing gets a person more motivated than a bullhorn.
The horn is raised above Wheeler’s head and sounded over and over again. Finally Riggs reaches towards the arm of his crouched partner and is able to finagle the horn free from his palm.
Riggs: You’ll get this back at the end of the show.
Sadness momentarily creeps over Wheeler who lowers his head, feeling naked without the precious bullhorn. He tries not to let it effect him as he looks up eagerly into the painted features of his gothic counterpart.
Wheeler: Are you at least a little more pepped up? If not I’ve got a gaggle of anorexic cheerleaders on standby.
The former 6 time SCW World Champion begins to dig into his pocket for his cell-phone before Riggs thrusts his palms out.
Riggs: No, no, no, I’m as ready as I’m ever going to be for this “four way.”
The quotation fingers are employed to confirm how sarcastic Riggs is being.
Jason: Are you sure, because regardless of what stipulations Douglas has placed on this match I’ll still come out there to have your back. You should have some reinforcements in case things get harrier than Robin Brooks’ armpits.
Riggs: I’ll be fine, I don’t want this match thrown out on some ludicrous technicality just because you decided to get involved. I’ll fight on my own, I’ll suffer on my own, and most importantly, I’ll win on my own. The Conspiracy may have greater numbers but that just means there’s more of them to get my hands on.
Wheeler: Fair enough. But now I feel like I wasted my time finding these pompoms.
Blue bushy pompoms are lifted into the air out of nowhere and shuck above Wheeler’s head.
Jason: I was going to come to ringside and do some interpretive dance routines to get you properly amped up.
Riggs blinks his eyes awkwardly, unsure of how to phrase his response kindly.
Riggs: Yeeeaahh, thanks, but no thanks. If anyone should have reinforcements at ringside, its you. That Johnny Kingdom is an unsavory fellow, who knows what he might do to beat you, especially after what happened earlier.
Wheeler: Okay, I’ll let you come to ringside with me if you bring the pompoms.
They are thrust out towards Rigs who glares at them oddly.
Riggs: Um, I think I’ll pass.
Jason: Well then, SORRY, but you can’t come….
The pompoms are tossed over Wheeler’s shoulders.
Wheeler: Like yourself, I want to beat Kingdom on my own. And I don’t want there to be any chance that the match is thrown out because you get involved, as per the terms of Douglas’ “special stips.”
Riggs: I guess I can respect that. Oh, and might I ask why you haven’t cashed in on your N.H.B title shot against Christian Savior yet?
Riggs rises to his feet, preparing to embark on his journey towards the ring while Wheeler cups his hand under his jaw.
Jason: Good question, but I have a better answer. Savior would be expecting me to face him for the N.H.B title right away, and it’s going to drive him crazy the longer I wait, because he’ll constantly be looking over his shoulder wondering when I’ll strike and take his title.
Riggs: How wonderfully twisted.
Jason: I thought so. And besides, technically the terms of that tag match stated that if I pinned Savior I’d have a shot at his belt, but it didn’t say what belt. So if his World title aspirations pan out, it’s safe to assume that I won’t be challenging him for the N.H.B belt if you catch my drift.
An odd smile forms on Riggs’ face as he nods, understanding Wheeler’s plot.
Wheeler: SEE. I’m a diabolical genius on the level of Lex Luthor, the Gene Hackman version, not the shitty Kevin Spacey one. Anyway, good luck out there.
He slaps Riggs on the back, which seems to irritate the painted warrior over this violation of his personal space. His emotionless eyes turn towards the smirking face of Wheeler.
Riggs: Thanks, same to you. And there’s no need to thank me for your win last week.
This callous statement is delivered as Riggs vacates the boiler-room, marching towards the ring. All the while Wheeler watches him leave with arched eyebrows.
Wheeler: I seriously need to get that guy laid.
COMMERCIAL BREAK
IWC…providing the greatest wrestling moments
OVER-PROTECTIVE
Through the backstage entrance to the Manhattan Center storms the Icon himself, Orlando Cruze. He is met with thunderous applause as he makes his way into the building, wearing both his title belts, and flanked by both his wife Kloe and his son Owen. Neither one seems to be comfortable as they step through the entrance, Orlando holding the door open for them with one hand and holding his duffle bag in the other. He looks over his shoulder to make sure no one is waiting in the shadows to pounce on his family.
Kloe: Honestly honey, isn’t this being a little too over protective?
Cruze scowls while leading his wife and son down the corridor towards his tiny dressing room/broom closet.
Orlando: I don’t think I’m being protective enough. There’s a reason I was ordered to be here tonight when I’m not even scheduled to compete, it’s got to be some kind of plot by Savior to get to you or Owen.
Although she tries to be accommodating Kloe can’t help but to protest.
Kloe: You’re getting yourself all paranoid and worked up over nothing. That Christian Savior guy wouldn’t really mess with me or Owen, he’s all talk.
Cruze: Did you not see what he did to Nathan Creed?
The thought of the brutality suffered onto Creed makes them both a little nervous.
Kloe: Yes, we all visited him in the hospital, but your going to drive yourself nuts trying to watch out for us every second. Besides, isn’t it more dangerous for us to be here then staying at home?
Orlando: I’m not letting you or Owen out of my sight. As long as your at my side your safe, so that’s where your going to stay until I’ve finished off Savior once and for all.
His large hand engulfs the top of his son’s head as Owen looks up at him with a smile, batting his little eyes. Kloe looks at her son then into the serious, worried eyes of the Icon before finally giving up.
Kloe: Okay, I’ll do what you say for now, but you can’t keep us under lock and key forever.
ORLANDO, ORLANDO…!
All eyes foully shift to the inbound Sallie, Cruze’s vindictive former lover. Instead of being the calm, collective deviant we’ve seen for almost a year, she seems to have completely lost her mind. Her hair is disheveled and panic hangs in her eyes as she rushes right towards Orlando, now hesitate to grab him by the shoulders. Kloe is on the verge of pouncing on Sallie only to have Cruze hold her back, seeing the terror depicted in his ex’s eyes.
Sallie: She’s gone, SHE’S GONE!
Orlando: Who’s gone?
Sallie: BECCA! I can’t find her anywhere. I turned my back for one minute and she vanished. Do you have her, do you have her you son of a bitch!?!
With tears rolling down her cheeks she begins to shake Cruze who finally takes her by the wrists, forcing her hands off of his shoulders.
Cruze: CALM DOWN. I don’t have Becca. How long has she been missing?
Sallie: I don’t know, I don’t know. This is all my fault.
She is absolutely beside herself as it begins to dawn on Cruze that his illegitimate daughter may have been abducted by Savior.
Orlando: This isn’t a set up is it?
Sallie looks at him in shock over such an accusation.
Sallie: NO! Are daughter is missing and no one will help me. Dan won’t lift a finger and Krissie is avoiding the building because of Aurora and David. You’ve GOT to help me!
Finally she forces her hands out of Orlando’s grasp and places them on her head, almost ripping her hair out.
Orlando: I know who’s got your daughter, Christian.
Orlando breaks down his stone like façade and begins to believe Sallie despite her history of deceit.
Sallie: That, that’s impossible. He wouldn’t….
Cruze: Christian is out of control and something needs to be done about him. Listen, calm yourself down and we’ll get to the bottom of this.
Kloe doesn’t like what she’s seeing as Orlando places his hand comfortingly on Sallie’s shoulder, who doesn’t shy away from his touch.
Sallie: Maybe I was wrong about you Orlando.
The Icon takes a deep breath.
Orlando: That’s not important right now, we need to find Becca, come on.
He takes hold of Owen’s hand, making sure he’s got a firm clasp before leading the way down the hall, Sallie and Kloe stepping side by side. They exchange a foul glare while following the World Champion down the corridor.
RIGGS VS. PAT EVANS VS. PHANTOM VS. CHRISTIAN SAVIOR
The show returns to the inside of the Manhattan Center where the fans are sitting in confusion over the last backstage scene.
Susie: When did IWC become Gone Baby Gone? Bennifer isn’t writing for us now?
Comeau: No, but Becca Cruze is missing, and I guess tragedy can bring even the greatest of enemies together. I hope they find her but I have a sinking feeling that Christian Savior is behind this disappearance.
“Outsider” commences over the PA system, sending the crowd into an angered response. The curtains sway before parting, the Submission Champion Pat Evans strolling out onto the stage with his hand over the back of his neck. He seems to be feeling the effects of those numerous chair shots at the hands of Hurse earlier in the evening. Although quite grumpy Evans starts down the ramp ignoring the boos from the crowd then strolls up the steps onto the apron. He slips through the ropes then tosses the Submission title at the official, demanding he brings Riggs out now. Obviously Pat is looking to work out his frustrations on one half of the team that was victorious against the Conspiracy last week.
Moore: Pat doesn’t look happy.
Comeau: That happens when your assaulted with a chair.
Susie: How do you know, some people might be into that kind of thing.
Mark: Who?
Moore: Ummmm, Clive Barker?
Evans foully paces while his eyes remain focused on the stage, waiting for the painted warrior. “Falling Inside the Black” by Skillet now starts playing, resulting in even louder boos from the crowd, all of which directed upon the man who may be behind the abduction of Becca Cruze. Strangely no one comes through the curtains however, nobody emerges onto the stage, leaving Savior’s associate Evans quite perplexed in the ring.
Comeau: Where is the prime suspect?
Moore: I think I had it for dinner last night.
Mark: Not prime rib, prime suspect. Christian Savior nowhere to be found, which I would guess is a very, VERY bad thing. I was hoping to get some answers out of him in regards to Orlando’s missing daughter.
Finally the referee is grabbed by the shirt and forced towards Evans, who whispers into his ear.
Evans: Go ahead and bring out the others, Savior will be along shortly.
Momentarily the anger subsides and an unsettling grin forms on Pat’s face, stepping back and watching the stage. Official Chester Princeton shrugs and rolls his fingers towards the stage, telling them to get on with it. Savior’s music is cut and replaced with Phantom’s sinister entrance tunes. The crowd is equally as dejected by the sound of these tunes as through a layer of purple fog strolls the massive behemoth. He stops on the stage with his pupil-less eyes observing the ring where an eager Evans lurks. He starts down the ramp then steps up onto the apron, moving over the ropes and into the ring.
Comeau: We’ve seen a lot of Phantom here tonight after he tried to screw Hurse out of his match but accidentally ended up laying out David Freak.
Moore: Yay, it’s Frankenberry again, I hope he brings me some cereal. I won’t be allowed to eat it, but at least I can inhale the fumes and that counts as a whole meal.
Mark: Sure it does. It’ll be interesting to see how Phantom and Pat Evans interact in this match given their mutual disposition towards Hurse.
Phantom steps towards Evans, Pat looking up into his eyes and reading him the riot act, no pun intended. He seems to be laying down the law, insisting that Phantom follow orders as the big man smirks slightly. The arena drops into total darkness before the piano intro the Sacrament starts to play, causing the crowd to absolutely explode into a righteous ovation. Onto the stage now emerges Riggs to an even louder roar from the crowd, the painted warrior stopping on the stage to briefly overlook his legion of faithful fans.
Comeau: There is a marked man.
Susie: Yeah, he does where a lot of paint.
Mark: I wasn’t being quite that literal. Riggs is walking right into the hornet’s nest here tonight in what I guess can now be considered a two on one handicap match with the bizarre no show of Christian Savior.
Riggs finally starts down the stage when an aggressive Evans goes bolting up the ramp directly at him. He throws a right hand that his opposition ducks, stepping behind Pat who turns towards him and walks right into a waffling right hand. Riggs connects with another and another, each shot a little more devastating than the last. Finally Pat boots Riggs right to the ribs, doubling him over then dragging him towards the barricade that he slams him down face first into.
Moore: Hey, Pat is attacking Riggs before he could even get in the ring. Is that legal?
Mark: Anything is legal when your with the Conspiracy apparently.
The discombobulated Riggs is stricken directly between the eyes by Evans’ boot. The shot causes him to stagger backwards in the direction of the ring almost losing his footing. Phantom watches from the opposite side of the ring, leaning carelessly on the ropes, letting his opponents destroy each other so he can pick up the pieces.
Riggs leans against the apron spine first, shaking off the effects of that hard boot when Evans comes charging towards him in a very aggressive manner. He throws all his weight right at Riggs who steps out of the way, causing the Submission Champion to collide sternum first hard with the apron. The collision causes Pat to stagger backwards as he now spins to face Riggs who is leaning on the stairs. Again Evans charges at him only to be caught with a drop toe hold, causing him to tumble face first into the steps this time. He bounces off with a resounding thud that echoes throughout the arena.
Comeau: Evans’ aggressiveness proving to be his undoing in this contest thus far.
Moore: Why must he be so grumpy? Did he have a bad bowel movement this morning? I don’t have any myself, that’s one of the fringe benefits of not eating.
Mark: Wonderful.
Evans rolls across the mats holding his face after that brutal impact with the stairs, the earlier attack with the chair really limiting him in this match. The quick Riggs strolls across the mats when a bright round light begins to shine into his eyes from the crowd. He swipes his hands in front of his face, trying to block out the light that is blinding him.
Comeau: Where the hell is that light coming from? Is this another of these bizarre pranks we’ve seen tonight?
Susie: I have no idea.
Mark: Why am I not surprised?
The massive hand of Phantom reaches over the ropes, his thick fingers sinking into Riggs’ hair. The giant hoists Riggs up into the air by his hair as he now stands on the apron. He is turned around by the gothic goliath when Riggs suddenly takes him by the back of the head, dropping from the apron and pulling him down throat first into the top rope. Phantom bounces off the cables and staggers backwards, flailing his arms to keep himself upright while his opponent climbs back to the apron. Riggs now pulls himself over the top rope into a shoulder tackle connecting right against Phantom’s sternum.
This impact knocks Phantom from his feet, sending him tumbling to the canvas across his back. Riggs lands on his elbows and knees then rises to his feet, rushing across the ring into the ropes off to the side of his opposition. He jumps over the top rope to the apron and now grabs the cables, flipping over them into a senton splash. However, Phantom gets his knees up, causing him to crash spine first right into them. Riggs arches his back and rolls across the ring towards the turnbuckle, painstakingly taking the ropes and dragging himself to his feet.
Moore: Riggs expertly hitting those knees.
Comeau: Actually that was bad and not intended by Riggs.
The painted apparition rolls finally to his feet and finds himself pressed back first against the turnbuckle. That’s when Phantom steps in and wedges his foot directly beneath Riggs’ throat, choking the life out of him. His legs kick beneath him as Riggs tries his best to force the boot away from his jugular. Finally the referee starts a five count, Princeton reaching four before Phantom takes his boot away then launches himself elbow first into the side of his adversary’s head.
Riggs almost falls out of the corner due to the impact when Phantom is surprisingly shoved aside by Evans. The intense Pat stops in front of Riggs, delivering a swift chop across his chest, then another, and then another. He now begins to stomp away at Riggs’ stomach, inflicting a lot of damage. Phantom now moves back in and shoves Pat aside, lifting his giant palm into the air and chopping down hard across Riggs’ chest. A groan emanates from the crowd as he almost tumbles out of the corner, bending forward with his arms wrapped around his chest.
Mark: Phantom and Evans double teaming Riggs now. Remember Phantom is still bitter towards Riggs for eliminating him from that battle royal several months ago.
Moore: How do you remember this stuff? I can barely recall where I live, which is why I’ve been sleeping under the ring, it makes going to the potty awkward.
Comeau: I was wondering what that smell was.
Phantom lifts his palm into the air for another chop when Riggs is pulled out of the corner by Evans. The Submission Champion drags him to the center of the ring then hoists Riggs into the air before scoop slamming him down hard to the canvas. He steps back lifting his elbow in order to drop it into his opposition’s sternum when Phantom cuts him off, jumping into the air and big splashing the down Riggs. He promptly hooks his leg for the pinfall.
1
2
Somehow Riggs is able to get his shoulder up from underneath all that girth. The angered Phantom stands up and takes Riggs around the head, forcing him up to his feet then placing him in a front chancery for a vertical suplex. That’s before Pat steps up behind Riggs, taking him around the waist and snapping over backwards into a bridging German. He completely dragged him out of the front chancery, leaving Phantom flustered.
1
2
Riggs launches his shoulder from the ring, avoiding yet another pinning attempt. The painted warrior falls over to his knees while Evans stands up in front of him, hooking both of his arms for a tiger bomb. Riggs is dragged to his feet as Pat sets up for the move only to have Phantom grab him around the cranium and deliver a vicious headbunt. The impact knocks Pat to the canvas while Phantom turns towards Riggs who spins around connecting with a back heel kick to his ribs.
Comeau: Phantom having enough of Pat but it left him open for that heinous kick to the ribs.
Moore: Awww, why can’t people just work together. It’s just like that song YMCA.
Mark: How is it anything like YMCA?
Susie: I don’t know, I just like that song.
With Phantom bent forward he’s in perfect position for Riggs who jumps into the air catching him with the code breaker. Phantom comes down face first into both of his opponent’s knees, causing him to stand and again flail his arms to remain upright. Riggs rises to his feet with great haste and jumps into the air, nailing him to the chest with a spinning heel kick. The impact of the heels to the sternum sends Phantom staggering backwards into the ropes then falling through them to the outside of the ring. He somehow manages to land on his feet, leaning side first against the apron for support.
The quick Riggs turns towards Evans who comes barreling across the ring, driving his shoulder directly into his ribs. Riggs is hoisted into the air and powered back first into one of the corners, Evans repeatedly driving his shoulder into his gut. These collisions are causing Riggs to stoop over in pain before Pat stands in front of him, delivering a hard European Uppercut to his jaw.
Comeau: Pat now unloading on Riggs in that corner.
With intensity Evans steps backwards and rushes in for a big running lariat. Before he can connect Riggs pulls himself up into the corner, standing on the second rope then jumping over the inbound Pat’s back with a sunset flip. He catches Pat around the waist and rolls him up into the pinning predicament.
1
Evans rolls backwards to his feet then grabs Riggs’ ankle, lifting it up into the air in an attempt to apply the ankle lock. However, Riggs rolls in reverse, freeing his ankle then launching himself head first right into Pat’s stomach. The impact causes Evans to double over, grasping his ribs while Riggs stands up in front of him and takes him around the neck for a big DDT. Pat twists his body free from the front chancery though, stepping behind Riggs’ back then reaching down and grabbing hold of his ankle. It’s snatched up off of the canvas causing Riggs to fall forward, Evans immediately trying to establish the ankle lock yet again.
Moore: Look, Pat is trying to pull an Axl Evermore and steal someone’s shoe.
Comeau: No, he’s going for the ankle lock. But it’s good that you remembered what happened between Evermore and Jessica Raines earlier tonight.
Susie: When were Axl and Jessica here? I would have liked to see that.
Mark: That’s it, I give up.
Evans stands up wrenching and tearing at the ankle when Riggs rolls to his back, wedging his feet to Pat’s sternum then pushing him off backwards into the cables. Pat bounces off and staggers forward into Riggs who catches him with a small package.
1
2
The Submission Champion kicks out just before the three count could be made, both men rolling across the canvas then getting to their feet. They lunge forward and tie up with a collar elbow when both of their heads are grabbed by the massive Phantom. He pushes their craniums together then delivers a straight headbunt to both their noggins, knocking the two down to the ring.
Comeau: With one headbunt Phantom has managed to take out both of his opponents.
Moore: He has a big head.
Mark: What a wonderful follow up.
Both Riggs and Evans grip their craniums when Phantom reaches down, taking Pat around the legs. He lifts them up and tucks them under his armpits, looking over his shoulder at the slowly standing Riggs, who gets to his feet with wobbly legs beneath him. The painted warrior turns towards Phantom who giant swings Pat Evans directly into him.
The collision knocks Riggs from his feet and sends him flying right back down to the ring. Evans grasps at his mid-section while rolling across the ring after such an impact, Phantom taking him by the hair and forcing him to his feet. He hooks Pat under the arm and then throws him incredible high into the air with a hip toss. Pat comes down from a tremendous height before finally meeting a foul fait as he collides with the ring.
The brutish Phantom continues to press his advantage, taking hold of Riggs’ hair and dragging him up to his feet. He is now whipped across the ring into the cables, bouncing off then coming back in at Phantom who catches him against his chest and stomach, hoisting him into the air with a gorilla press. Somehow Riggs slips off of his wide palms though, landing right behind Phantom then charging forward and jumping into the air. He catches Phantom around the back of his neck and drags him down into a huge bulldog.
Phantom’s face crashes with force against the ring as he now rolls onto his seat, sitting up with his eyes fluttering. That’s when an upright Pat comes charging in and jumping into the air, delivering a dropkick right to Phantom’s ample chest. After this dropkick Phantom sluggishly rolls to his knees, still trying to get up only to have Riggs charge in and deliver a shining wizard right to his face.
Comeau: This is something I didn’t expect to see heading into this match, Riggs and Evans are actually working together against Phantom.
Moore: Their hitting him from all angles, just like what happened to me at that S&M Club I went too. And here I thought it was the place you go to buy things in bulk.
Phantom is laid out after taking all these shots from his aggressive opponents while Riggs starts to stand up. As soon as he reaches his feet Pat steps in and blasts him across the sternum with a knife edge chop. Riggs is almost taken down when Pat boots him to the ribs, stuffs his head under his seat then hoists him into the air for his version of the crucifix powerbomb. He rushes forward when Riggs slips off of his shoulders, landing on his feet right behind him. Pat continues forward into the cables, bouncing off then coming back in at Riggs who scoops him up into his shoulder for the Hopskotch to a huge reaction from the crowd.
Comeau: Riggs is setting up for the Hopskotch!
Moore: But he doesn’t have a piece of chalk or any cement to draw squares on.
Riggs turns seemingly on the verge of victory when Christian Savior comes out of nowhere, bolting across the ring and delivering a high impact spear right to the painted competitor’s gut. Riggs collapses to his spine with Evans coming down on top of him, the crowd squealing over what they just witnessed. The maniacal Savior jumps to his feet with a diabolical twisted expression on his truly crazed features.
Comeau: Where did Savior just come from? He was slated to be part of this match, yet he chooses now to finally make an appearance?
Susie: What an entrance, but still not as good as Joker’s pencil trick. I couldn’t pee for a week after seeing that.
Mark: Ooookay.
An extremely intense Savior steps towards the ropes, slipping through them to the apron then dropping to the mats. He backs around the ring and up the ramp, watching as Riggs rolls around on the canvas gripping at his ribs in terrible pain. Savior now turns and rushes back up the ramp through the curtains and to the gorilla position.
Comeau: Now where is he going?
Moore: Unexpected potty break?
The crowd is still stunned by what they just witnessed as Evans agonizingly crawls into the cover on Riggs, hooking the leg of the man who was seemingly on the verge of a huge victory.
Mark: Oh come on, this match cannot end this way.
The referee drops and makes the count to a loud outcry of boos from the fans.
1
2
3!
Somehow, someway Evans has emerged victorious even after he was moments away from tasting the Hopskotch. He rolls off of Riggs to his back, his chest heaving as he stares towards the rafters, unsure of how he just won this match himself.
Comeau: Big win for Pat Evans here tonight on Riot! after Savior came out of nowhere, speared Riggs then took back off.
Moore: I wanted the painted one to win, this isn’t fair.
Mark: If you don’t stop pouting I’ll make you take a time out.
Phantom rises to his feet on the outside of the ring, standing up and glaring through the ropes in disbelief over what just happened. Strangely he gains some solace in knowing that Riggs was pinned by Evans, meaning that the man who helped eliminate him from the battle royal did not emerge victorious tonight. The Painted Warrior agonizes as he covers his ribs and rolls to his side, his face distorted with rage over what just transpired.
STUCK IN THE MIDDLE WITH YOU
A massive ovation rips through the Manhattan Center at the sight of “The Team Leader” Johnny Kingdom. He is located right in front of a giant IWC emblem in the interview area, rubbing at the jaw that was superkicked earlier tonight by the returning Hellkat. The camera pans out to reveal a slightly inebriated Billy Mayne clutching a microphone and wavering from side to side. Bandages are placed over his nose after it was broken by Phantom in an interview many weeks ago.
Billy Mayne: Yep, it’s Billy, life’s favorite punching bag. And to prove that God is out to make me miserable, I’m standing here alongside Johnny Kingdom.
Another loud ovation commences from the crowd as Kingdom’s name is mentioned. He just continues to rub at his jaw with a slight smirk on his face.
Johnny: Jeez, nice to see you and your liverspots too Billy.
A shocked Mayne reaches for his face, seeing if he can feel such blotches on his perfect skin.
Kingdom: I’m in no mood to sit here exchanging witless banter with you.
Mayne: Then why did you ask for this interview time? Do you love being around me that much?
Johnny finds this thought laughable.
Johnny: Sure, I love hanging out with clichés, that’s why I team with Orlando Cruze so frequently. As World Heavyweight Champion I think it’s fair that I should get as much airtime as possible without being questioned about it.
This statement leaves the alcoholic former announcer perplexed.
Mayne: Um, what do you mean by World Heavyweight Champion?
Now Kingdom acts as if he’s the one taken aback.
Kingdom: What do you mean, what do I mean? I meant exactly what I said, I’m your World Heavyweight Champion…did you not see me pin Christian Savior all those weeks ago?
Billy: Yeah, in between vomiting in what I thought was a trashcan but turned out to be Jon Rich’s lap. But wasn’t Orlando the one who technically won that match by virtue of pinning Christian?
Again Kingdom would laugh if his jaw wasn’t so sore.
Kingdom: I beg to differ. Orlando wasn’t the legal participant in that World Heavyweight title match between myself and Savior, therefore his pin shouldn’t count, and since you want to be technical, I’m the Champion.
Billy strains his brain to figure out how this could be legal.
Johnny: But I’ll deal with all that later, because right now I just want to inform Desolation that it doesn’t matter how many relics he “resurrects” from the past, nothing is going to stop me from pinning him at the Overbooked Extravaganza.
The intense gaze of Kingdom transfers to the camera.
Kingdom: He can have Hellkat show up and superkick me again, or have Axl distract me, or even bring Peter Doyle back to life to perform his famed musical act with Gene Wilder before being sent crazy by sparking light-bulbs. It matters not who or what he brings to that match, because in the first time ever meeting between the Team Leader and the Dark Man, it will be I, the World Heavyweight Champion himself that emerges victorious.
Mayne: That may be the case, but just to be safe I think you should re-hire me as your legal council and sign over your power of attorney.
Kingdom feigns interest in this proposal, making Billy excited for the first time in ages.
Johnny: Uhhhh no.
Solemnly Billy lowers his head.
Johnny boy.
The intensity in Kingdom escalates as he looks up, fists clinched towards an inbound Axl Evermore. Another deafening roar rips through the Manhattan Center at the sight of the Fully Loaded member, who stops just a few inches removed from Kingdom.
Kingdom: Man, you really must not have been satisfied by the beating I gave you the other week.
Axl lifts his palms and steps back, trying to maintain the peace in his weakened, still exhausted condition.
Axl: Slow your roll hero, I’m not here to pick a fight, that’s not what I want.
Kingdom: Well, I’m not known for giving in to what people want.
Evermore: No need to be as hostile as Lucy Lawless, Kingdom, just let me say my peace then you can do as you wish.
A sigh emanates from Kingdom as he lifts his finger, moving it in a circular motion in order for Axl to wrap it up quickly.
Axl: Listen, I don’t want to be stuck in the middle of this whole war between you and Desolation and it’s not my place to get involved, but all I want you and the Dark Man to do is THINK.
Johnny: I’m way ahead of you there tiger.
Evermore: No doubt. All I’m saying is that you two shouldn’t be trying to “kill” each other, it’s too cliché. You’re just doing exactly what the Conspiracy wants. You should be working together.
He meshes his fingers together to symbolize what he’s saying. Johnny scoffs at the notion.
Johnny: You know Axl, I doubt your motives are all that noble, and I could honestly care less what they are. The mere notion of working with Desolation makes me want to shower, so stop meddling.
Evermore lowers his head and rubs at his eyes in frustration.
Kingdom: And rather you want to be in the middle of this “war” or not is inconsequential, because you’re already involved. Once I’m done with Desolation, I’ll come back to finish where we left off last week, and then maybe you’ll pick your alliances a little wiser.
The Team Leader marches past Axl, bumping shoulders with him while passing by. Evermore turns and watches him leave, shaking his head.
Axl: Why does everyone have to be so thick headed around here.
Billy steps to Axl’s side, placing his arm over his shoulders and also shaking his head.
Billy: I ask myself the same question all the time.
An irritated Evermore turns towards Mayne with a strange expression on his face.
Evermore: Don’t touch me.
Billy lowers his arm and his head sadly, slowly creeping away from the threatening Evermore.
COMMERCIAL BREAK
THE MISSING
Orlando Cruze: GOD DAMMIT DOUGLAS….you have the power to stop this…
A smug Dan Douglas sits behind his desk folding a piece of paper into a swan and paying little attention to the ramblings of the enraged Orlando. The World Heavyweight Champion paces back and forth in front of a long line of security guards clad in riot gear, clutching their trusty batons in an intimidating manner. They form a human barricade between the furious Icon and the apathetic owner.
Orlando: You need to end this before it goes TOO far.
Dan: I don’t NEED to do anything.
Both of his feet are kicked up and placed over the corner of the desk as he continues to devote all of his attention to the swan he’s manufacturing from someone’s contract.
Cruze: You callous bastard. Who knows what he’s doing to my daughter, STOP THIS, reason with him, he’ll listen to you.
A minor chuckle emanates from the president.
Douglas: Sorry, not my problem sport.
Orlando is on the verge of diving through security and getting his hands on the owner’s throat.
Orlando: Don’t you have even a shred of human decency? If Christian does anything to her you can be held legally liable, not to mention you’ll bring down the full weight of my wrath on you. So get off your ass and do something.
A smirking Douglas puts the swan down on the table and looks up into the steaming eyes of the double champion.
Dan: So let’s get this straight? Your asking for MY help?
Orlando: Just tell me where he is and I’ll deal with this myself.
Dan scratches at his chin, mulling it over.
Douglas: Ummm, nah’.
Rage continues to swell in the World Champion.
Dan: For one, I don’t know where Christian is, and secondly, I’m not going to give you another hand out, like you’ve been receiving your entire miserable career.
Cruze: Don’t forget she’s Sallie’s daughter too. I thought you cared about Sallie and her kid.
Douglas: Appearances can be deceiving.
He arrogantly leans back in his chair, interlocking his hands behind his head.
Dan: The only reason I associated with Sallie was to use her against you silly, other than that, her and her little girl are meaningless to me. Sallie knows that. But I’ll tell you what Orlando, if I knew where Christian was, and if I had some proof that he was behind this, maybe I’d help a little.
Orlando: You have no idea what you’re doing Dan. You’ve yet to see what I’m capable of.
Douglas: Jeez, isn’t threatening me counterproductive to asking me for help?
Orlando’s fists clinch and he prepares to fight his way through the line of security guards before a frantic Kloe rushes up behind him, grabbing the World Champion’s shoulder.
Kloe: OWEN IS GONE!
The eyes of the Icon open widely, filling with horror as he spins to face his shocked wife. She, much like Sallie earlier, is in tears, absolutely losing her mind.
Cruze: I thought you were watching him!
These words are produced with no real thought while Kloe almost crumbles to the floor, her knees buckling.
Kloe: I WAS! I took him to the bathroom and turned my back, when I spun around he was GONE. Oh my God, what did I do!?!
Cruze pulls his crazed sobbing wife towards him, wrapping his hand around the back of her head. He turns his sights towards the intrigued Douglas.
Orlando: Don’t cross this line Douglas, don’t do it.
The unconcerned president rolls his eyes and falls back in his chair with a huff.
Dan: FINE. I’ll have security look for your kids, but it’s not my fault your wife is a negligent mother.
Kloe: YOU BASTARD!
She tries to get around Orlando to dig her claws into Dan’s eyes before the Champion grabs her around the waist, dragging her out of the VIP dressing room.
Cruze: I’ll find him Kloe, I’ll find him!
MAX CRAVEN VS. AURORA ROSE
The camera returns to ringside to spot the shocked faces of the fans over what they just witnessed when “Coming Undone” hits the PA system. This shocks the fans out of their silence over the proceeding events, all of their eyes feasting on a very angered Aurora Rose as she storms out onto the stage. In a huff she thrusts her arm above her head then drops it to her side and marches towards the ring. Her eyes are brazen with intensity after what transpired last week. The athletic young competitor hops to the apron, slipping through the ropes then stopping in the middle of the ring, not making her usual fan friendly gestures on this evening.
Moore: I wonder if Aurora enjoyed her honeymoon. I hope they went to Disney Land and met Mickey Mouse.
Comeau: People do not go to Disney Land on their honeymoon.
Susie: I did, three times, it was pretty much the only reason I got married.
A rather flustered Aurora turns towards the entry way, shimmying between feet in preparation for the man she’s about to vindicate herself by defeating.
Mark: We have to change gears from the increasingly twisted mystery going on backstage involving Orlando Cruze’s missing children, because right now we’re about to witness what should be a heated confrontation.
Moore: I can’t believe Aurora is about to face an ordained minister. That’s like facing Mister Belvedere, it’s just sacreligious.
Comeau: Well, Max did marry Aurora and David Freak without either one’s consent, so I think Craven was kind of asking for what he’s about to get.
Aurora bitterly focuses on the entry way in anticipation of Craven’s arrival. Just then Max’s music hits the PA system, leading into an outcry of cheers from the sold out audience. Everyone in the building erupts into a wave of support for the leader of the Church of Hot Addiction. He strolls out onto the stage when his music is suddenly cut and replaced with….
NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP
NEVER GONNA LET YOU DOWN
As Craven strolls onto the ramp he suddenly stops and looks around in confusion, wondering what the hell happened to his entrance music and why he’s suffering the indignity of listening to Rick Astley.
Comeau: Oh no, now we’ve been RICKROLLED!
Moore: I had a whole gang do that to me once.
Mark: That’s not what Rickrolled means….but tell me the rest of this story later.
Max awkwardly makes his way down the ramp listening to these terrible lyrics in combination with a horrible, ear raping beat. Somehow he perseveres upon entering the ring, shrugging in the direction of a vengeful Aurora, who has to be restrained by the referee.
Comeau: I guess that’s all the explanation we needed from Craven over his actions on the last Riot!
Susie: Then how come I failed my mid-terms by shrugging at all the questions?
Mark: Because your brain is a black hole of idiocy. I still can’t believe the audacity of these pranks on tonight’s Riot! I sincerely hope we’re not being Punk’d because that would be incredibly, incredibly gay.
As soon as the bells rings Aurora barrels right towards Craven, spearing him directly to the ribs, taking both competitors down to the canvas.
Comeau: Wow, look at Aurora!
Moore: Do I have to?
Mark: I haven’t seen her start a match this aggressively in a long time.
Aurora is on top of Craven, decking him repeatedly between the eyes as he tries his best to defend himself. Referee Fitzpatrick tries to get between them as Rose now throws forearms into the jaw of her rival. Max suddenly wedges his feet to her chest and shoves her off, sending the bitter competitor rolling backwards to her feet. Craven barely has time to reach his feet before Aurora is right on top of him again, delivering a chop across his chest then throwing forearm strikes into the side of his face.
Moore: Aurora sure is angry, someone must have broken her Rainbow Bright Nightlight.
Mark: I think she’s more hostile over Craven’s part in her forced marriage to Freak.
These brutal shots have Max very dazed and incoherent while Aurora now steps back and spins around into a roaring forearm. As soon as she steps in Craven connects with a modified thrust kick right to her jaw, the strike knocks Rose down hard to the canvas. Max staggers forward into the ropes, falling against them side first after delivering the lethal strike that has finally gotten Aurora off of his back.
The strike to the jaw may have removed Rose from her feet but it can’t keep her down for long. Almost immediately she starts to get to her feet, still gripping at her jaw when Craven charges in, delivering a swift boot right to the side of her face. The shot knocks Aurora down hard to the canvas while Max staggers forward into the ropes yet again.
Comeau: Max finally with some offense in this contest, utilizing those lethal kicks to Aurora’s detriment.
Moore: He’s got those huge Flintstone feet. Do you think Craven’s got a pet dinosaur? That be awesome!
After receiving such a stiff kick Aurora finds herself rolling across the canvas in the direction of the turnbuckle, pulling herself up to her feet. As soon as she reaches her feet Max charges across the ring and lunges into the air, delivering a forearm strike right to Rose’s face. The blow renders Aurora almost unconscious on her feet as Craven grabs her by the hair, forcing his opponent down out of the corner. She rolls onto her back across the canvas the Fully Loaded member pulling himself up onto the turnbuckle backwards. He stands on the middle rope then launches himself off with an extension of his leg. At the last second Aurora rolls out of the way, causing Craven to connect with nothing but canvas.
His posterior hits the ring hard, causing Craven to wince in pain while Rose forces herself to her feet. She then steps in towards a rising Craven, catching him with a hard right hand to he jaw. Max is disorientated by this strike while Aurora charges backwards into the ropes, bouncing off then coming back in at her dazed opponent. She jumps into the air, landing on his shoulders then pulling him around into a hurricarana. Craven is flipped forward, sent crashing with force against the canvas.
Moore: Aurora trying to play reverse piggy back but sadly Craven couldn’t hold her up.
Mark: Ummm, that was a hurricarana.
Susie: I like reverse piggy back even better.
A stunned Craven is still reeling from the intense way this encounter commenced, having trouble reaching his feet. As soon as he stands up a seated Aurora rolls backwards towards him. She lifts her legs into the air, wrapping them around Max’s neck then pushing herself up off of the canvas with her palms. The crowd is pumped as she begins to make rotation after rotation after rotation, pulling Craven around in a modified head scissors of sorts, her ankles wrapped around his neck. Before she can snap off though, Max reaches up and grabs her ankles, forcing them apart then wrapping his arms around her thighs. He pulls her up into a modified wheelbarrow only for Rose to reach back catching him around the neck then dropping to her seat with a stunner. The wheelbarrow stunner sends Craven stumbling in reverse right into the cables.
Comeau: Amazing counter by Aurora!
Moore: Craven looks stunned, they should call that move the DAZZLER!
Mark: Yeah, sure.
Craven bounces off the ropes and stumbles forward into Rose who rolls backwards from her seated base, interlocking her ankles around his neck. She pushes herself off the canvas with her palms, pulling Craven around into multiple rotations before snapping off into a head scissors. Max flips forward, slamming hard across the ring spine first to a rousing response from the crowd, shocked by Rose’s speed. After connecting with this move she rolls to the center of the ring, waiting for Max to stand.
A wobbly Max gets to his feet and turns towards Aurora who rolls forward across the canvas then dives out of said roll into a soaring European Uppercut. The move connects hard to Craven’s jaw, knocking him down to the canvas as Aurora crawls into the cover.
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Craven launches his shoulder from the ring, sitting up and reaching for his jaw in the process.
Moore: Poor Max, he doesn’t look like he was expecting this.
Comeau: How was he expecting Aurora to react after he forced her to marry David Freak?
Susie: I don’t know, I thought she would be as thankful as Sloth in Goonies when he was given the Baby Ruth bar. I always had the biggest crush on him.
Mark: That is sick beyond description.
A sizeable portion of the fans are going nuts for Aurora’s offense even against Craven who is rolling away from her, trying to create some space so he can get his head straight. He just starts to stand up when Aurora goes into a headstand, the back of her legs falling on top of Craven’s shoulders. It’s obvious that she’s going for yet another head scissors only to have Max push down on the back of her legs. This causes her to fall down knees first to the canvas in front of him, Craven immediately grabbing her head and pulling it under his seat. He reaches out wrapping his arms around her waist then lifting her up into the air in a pilderiver position. Craven sticks his arm through her legs then delivers a cradle piledriver.
Mark: That move may have just changed the tide.
Moore: What about my sandcastles!?!
Comeau: First, I wasn’t being literal as there is no tide, and secondly, there’s no sand to make castles.
Aurora drops to the canvas across her back, laying there in an incoherent condition right next to Craven. An equally as dazed Max crawls into the lateral press.
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Somehow Rose is able to power her shoulder from the ring, just avoiding the three count. Therefore Max drags her up to her feet and takes her over with a brutal release exploder suplex. The force in which Aurora’s back meets canvas is truly devastating as Max crawls again into the cover. He hooks both legs this time and wedges his forearm to her face for further leverage on his long time rival.
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Again Rose launches her shoulder from the ring, prompting Craven to drag her around to a kneeling base. He forces her to her feet while spinning so that their backs are wedged together before dropping down with a hangman neckbreaker. Aurora’s head hits hard while Max stands up at her side then jumps high into the air. He comes down knee first directly into Rose’s face, causing her to convulse while covering her skull with both palms.
Mark: High impact move after high impact move by Craven, who also comes into this match seeking revenge against the woman who had him suspended several months ago.
Moore: Yeah, but I’m sure it was only because Aurora knew Max’s body needed a break from the business. So that you know, his body could be used for his other business.
Comeau: Would you stop sticking up for all the women wrestlers and quit bringing up Craven’s porn star credentials, it’s all so cliché.
Susie: No need for name calling Mark.
Max stands up and places his boot across Aurora’s forehead, scraping his heel against her flesh rather maliciously. The pain causes Aurora to sit up, rubbing at her features while Craven charges behind her, jumping high into the air with a hesitation dropkick right to the back of her head. The strike causes Aurora to convulse as she rolls across the canvas to her elbows and knees, gripping at her neck in pain. Her agony only further intensifies Max’s attack, the cult leader, stepping over her head then grinding his hips to much fanfare.
He now takes Aurora by the hair, gently leading her to her feet then slapping her gently on the cheek in a sympathetic fashion. That’s when he pie faces her and knocks Aurora backwards into the turnbuckle, her spine pressed against it as she barely maintains her footing. Craven starts towards her immediately, pushing Rose up to a seated position on the top rope. He now delivers a hard jab to her jaw then turns his back towards her, grabbing both arms and crossing them above his head.
Comeau: Craven looking for the Insane-Asylum AKA the driving Iconoclasm.
Susie: This move sounds like Spawn’s special blood.
Mark: Your comic book dorkery never stops amazing me.
Just before he can connect Aurora knees Max to the back of the head, then does it yet again, forcing him to break up his attempt at the Insane-Asylum. She now sticks out her leg, placing it across the back of Max’s neck then dropping down out of the corner with a modified famouser. As a result Max is driven with incredible force face first into the canvas, causing him to pop up onto his knees as he immediately tries to stand up.
Aurora rolls across the ring to her feet then comes charging in at her standing opponent, catching the hunched over Craven around the neck then stepping up the ropes. She pushes herself off the turnbuckle into a huge tornado DDT, Craven being driven with incredible force head first into the canvas. He bounces from the ring like a spring, flipping over and coming down spine first into the canvas. Aurora turns, crawling desperately into the cover.
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Max kicks out to a thunderous reaction from the crowd, many of them thinking that Aurora had the pin for sure. She sits up debating the speed of the official’s count.
Comeau: Aurora so close to getting the pinfall on Craven thanks to that combination of moves!
Moore: She spiked Max right on his head, he’s might have brain damage.
Mark: Then the two of you would finally have something in common.
Both competitors are battered after this fast paced intense encounter, the rivals trying to beat one another to a standing base. They get to their feet when Rose chops Craven across the chest, then does it again, the shots staggering her nemesis. She now rushes into the ropes in front of him, bouncing off and coming back in when Craven spins around blasting her to the side of the face with a roaring back chop. Upon being hit with the blow Aurora finds herself barely able to remain upright, her legs almost buckling beneath her.
Craven steps back to finish the job, spinning around into yet another back chop when Aurora side steps him and jumps into the air, connecting with a step up enzugari to the back of his head. Max is launched forward into the ropes, twisting and bouncing from them spine first before coming at Rose who dives into the air with a picture perfect dropkick. Her boots connect stiffly to his face, knocking Craven down hard while Aurora lands in a crawling base at his side.
Comeau: More hard shots from Aurora!
Moore: These two really know how to use their feet, just like me. I make peanut butter sandwiches with my toes.
Mark: Thanks for sharing that piece of absolutely irrelevant information with us.
Aurora gets to her feet catching her breath then rushes into the ropes at the side of an incoherent Craven, or at least she thinks he’s incoherent. Rose bounces off of the ropes then goes over into a cartwheel, however, as soon as she does the necessary headstand, Max jumps to his feet then lunges forward into a dropkick on her upside down head. The crowd screams as Rose tumbles down hard to the canvas, landing right beside the laid out Cravem, suffering the effects of the same move she laid him out with just a few moments before.
The two find themselves laid out side by side yet again as Craven slowly begins to stand up, Aurora trying to do the same. They get to their feet with Aurora bent forward in front of Max still holding her head after that dropkick. Max spots this and as thus charges forward for a knee strike. Aurora side steps his knee and then drops down, leg sweeping the other leg of Craven out from under him. He tumbles onto his back as Rose stands up at his side then flips forward into a senton bomb right across his stomach. Before Max can even embrace his damaged ribs Aurora falls back into the hook of the leg.
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Craven lobs his shoulder from the ring putting the kibosh on Aurora’s victory.
Comeau: These two really going back and forth, knowing each other very well after all their months of feuding.
Moore: Maybe they should have gotten married instead of Aurora and David since they know each other so well.
Mark: Your logic doesn’t resemble the logic of any rational person on this planet.
Susie: Yay, I’m different.
Aurora rolls across the canvas towards the ropes, ending up on the opposite side of them as she glares down at the laid out Max. She now jumps to the top rope, twisting her body in mid-air so that she lands feet first on the cable, springing off backwards into a soaring moonsault. Aurora catches tremendous height then comes crashing down right on top of the laid out Max to disbelief from the fans. All the air is driven from Craven’s body as Aurora hooks both of his legs yet again.
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Yet again Craven kicks out even after that high flying move from his opponent.
Moore: Ohhh, Aurora flew and everything and yet she still couldn’t win. Max is a bully.
Aurora rolls away from Craven, gripping at her ribs in the process while kicking her legs. She did a great deal of damage to herself with that move. Max rolls away from her still holding his ribs as well, getting to a crawling base. Aurora suddenly rolls backwards across the canvas getting to her feet then flipping over backwards as she comes down leg first right across the back of Max’s head. The fans react with shock over that last acrobatic maneuver that drives Max again face first into the canvas.
Comeau: Where is Aurora pulling these moves from?
Moore: Her ovaries?
Mark: Stop speaking now.
The hard face first impact with the canvas causes Max to instinctively stand up, gripping at his nose while stumbling in reverse into the corner. He falls against it while continuously checking on his nose, making sure he’s not bleeding, Aurora standing up in the ring in front of him. She overlooks the screaming fans and then goes into another risky cartwheel. She then back flips out of the cartwheel twice, launching herself with a reverse elbow towards Craven who steps out of the way at the last second. As a result Aurora hits the turnbuckle hard against her spine Craven taking her around the neck then hooking her leg. Max drops into a backwards roll, pulling Aurora down with him then standing up and snapping out of the roll into a bridging fisherman suplex on Rose.
Mark: OH, a rolling fisherman suplex by Craven.
The referee drops and makes the count.
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Aurora launches her shoulder from the ring at the last conceivable second, Craven sitting up taking deep spiteful breaths. He sticks his fingers up in front of the official’s fast, making sure that he didn’t get a three count with that last move.
Mark: Another kick out, boy you are seeing some great X-Class style action in this one ladies and gentlemen.
Moore: Don’t call me a boy, I don’t have a penis, at least I didn’t the last time I checked.
Craven sluggishly rises, exasperated due to this encounter with his longest standing rival in the IWC. He now rushes at the turnbuckle, stepping up it to the top rope then jumping into the air and twisting his body so that he is facing the laid out Aurora. He springs off the top cable and flips forward into almost a 450 leg drop that connects right across Aurora’s throat. Rose begins to convulse while Max grips at his posterior, rolling away from her, unable to go for the pinfall due to the damage that he inflicted on himself.
Fans: IWC, IWC, IWC!!
Susie: What was that?
Comeau: A 450 leg drop by Craven!
Max is still holding at his rear end and his spine which may have been compressed by that move. Nevertheless he turns towards Aurora who is still gripping at her throat and rolling all across the canvas. Max stands up in anguish, reaching for his back while approaching Aurora, grabbing her hair and forcing her to her feet slowly. He hooks up both of her arms and twists around so that he’s now lifting her into the air for the vertibreaker. At the last second Aurora flips over in reverse, freeing herself from Max’s most deadly finisher. She stands up and takes Craven around the neck, rushing forward into the ropes for the Sinful Desires (Stratusfaction). Craven shoves her off at the last second though, Aurora jumping over the ropes before she can hit them.
She lands on the apron feet first to the shock of the fans as Max comes charging in now, Aurora jumping over the ropes but holding onto the top one. She twists her body so that her legs come down on top of Max’s shoulders, looking for another head scissors. He pushes up on her shins though, causing Aurora to fall ribs first on top of Craven’s shoulder as he turns towards the center of the ring, rushing forward and connecting with the North-Eastern Driver (Head drop Michinoku Driver).
Comeau: North-Eastern Driver from Craven on Rose after a cunning counter!
Moore: YOUCHERS!
Craven hooks Aurora’s leg with all of his remaining strength as the referee drops to make the count.
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3!
All those in attendance are screaming as Max has just picked up a win over Aurora in what was a truly grueling encounter.
Comeau: Aurora was so close to victory on so many occassions but in the end Craven caught her with that driver variation which just proved to be too much.
Moore: She’ll have her vindication, oh yes, she’ll have her vindication soon enough.
Craven lays on the canvas looking absolutely exhausted after that grueling encounter while Aurora does the same. She grips at her cranium while pulling herself up into the corner, trying to fight off the effects of that nasty head on collision with the canvas.
Comeau: We just witnessed a hell of a match between these two, but…
Awww, my poor cuddly muffin…
The crowd has a very mixed reaction at the sight of David Freak standing on the stage now clutching a microphone and sympathetically staring into the ring at Aurora. He seems genuinely saddened by the events that have unfolded here tonight while periodically reaching for his head, still suffering the effects of that chair shot.
Susie: Look, it’s Aurora’s husband.
Comeau: Yeah, the less you say that the less homicidal Aurora’s going to be.
Rose grips at her skull while shooting a piercing glare towards the man she was forced to wed, the now well dressed Freak.
David: Listen hun, I know you’re a little put off by what happened between us on the last Riot! and what just transpired here tonight, but I think you should look at the brighter side of things. Your now married to the BEST wrestler on the entire IWC roster, who else can say that?
His words do little to lessen Aurora’s anger.
Freak: I guess what I’m trying to imply is that I’m willing to give this a shot. I’m ready to put as much time as it takes into this relationship and getting you on board with OUR marriage. To prove how sincere I am in my devotion to you, I brought a special guest to tonight’s Riot!, an individual who can properly express my feelings towards you.
Aurora really doesn’t like where this is going as David steps back and extends his arm out towards the entry way.
David: This giant singing PANDA!
Through the curtains strolls an individual wearing a huge panda suit and holding a bamboo guitar.
Mark: Good God, and here I thought a singing telegram was bad enough.
Susie: IT’S A PANDA! WITH A GUITAR! This is the greatest moment in IWC history. First we had a dancing turkey, now we have a singing panda, I LOVE IT!
The Panda makes his way to the ring, gently stroking the strings of the guitar and tilting its head from side to side. The fans are both cheering and laughing at the same time as the Panda is on the verge of singing.
Freak: Of course it’s from China so you know it doesn’t speak a word of English, but the language of love is multinational BABY!
The Panda begins to sing in a soft Chinese tone when Aurora launches herself over the top rope, crashing down right on top of it with a back first senton. Panda tumbles to the mats with Rose landing on top and then reaching her feet with a truly enraged expression.
Comeau: THANK GOD!
Moore: Aww, Aurora just hurt that cuddly Panda.
Rose jumps to her feet and turns towards a shocked Freak, who puts his hands up defensively. The Punk Rock Princess now turns back towards the ring, spotting the steel chair that has come into play so many times this evening. She slides it the rest of the way out from under the squared circle then hoists its dented mass above her head, swinging it down into the ribs of the Panda. It tries to roll away, getting to its stomach when Aurora slams the chair over its spine, the crowd going absolutely nuts.
Moore: She CAN’T do this, I thought pandas were an endangered species.
Comeau: Aurora taking out all of her frustrations on that singing panda.
The panda is writhing in anguish as it receives chair shot after chair shot, Max Craven watching on from the ring in disbelief. Aurora now throws down the chair and grabs the bamboo guitar, lifting it above her head just as the singing panda gets to his knees. A loud ovation erupts from the crowd as she slams the guitar over the panda’s head, shattering it on impact. Panda tumbles to the canvas in a motionless heap while Aurora throws down the remnants of the guitar then snatches up the chair once again.
Her vindictive eyes turn towards David, who still holding his palms up defensively.
David: Hey now, calm down sweety. Whatever your planning would constitute as spousal abuse.
Aurora lifts the chair into the air and rushes up the ramp, David taking off towards the backstage area. Rose is in hot pursuit as the frantic Freak rushes through the curtains.
Comeau: Aurora now chasing her “husband” to the back after decimating this hapless singing panda.
Moore: Run Freaky, RUN!
GUARDIAN
The smiling face of the young, innocent Becca comes into the camera’s frame, dripping with ice-cream. In one hand she holds a cone that she is devouring, and in the other she grips the palm of a massive figure. The camera pulls back a little to reveal Owen walking on the opposite side of this gentleman, gripping his opposite palm and also enjoying a tasty ice-cream cone.
Comeau: There’s Becca and Owen, Orlando’s children…
Moore: Hopefully they’re bringing me an ice-cream cone too.
As the trio continues towards the ring the sinister vocals of a familiar voice can be heard speaking to the children.
You two ready to play a trick on daddy?
Owen nods with a smile while Becca shrugs, unaware of who her daddy really even is. Their reactions cause one Christian Savior to grin all the wider, his face coming into view as he continues to lead the children onward down the corridor.
Savior: Daddy is going to love this…hahahaha.
The three progress towards the ring.
Comeau: This doesn’t look promising, Christian Savior has both of Orlando’s kids and he’s coming towards the ring for the next edition of the Twilight Zone.
Moore: With my ice-cream cone?
Mark: NO!
COMMERCIAL BREAK
IWC…..we risk our lives to entertain you
TOUGH DECISIONS
The show returns live with a sudden burst of pyrotechnics erupting from all four turnbuckles of the ring. The lights raise to reveal the squared circle lavishly decorated for the Twilight Zone. The majority of those packed in the building can care less about the set-up because their eyes are trained on one individual, Christian Savior.
Christian: Welcome one and all to the BIGGEST episode of the Twilight Zone EVER.
Boos commence from the crowd as they spot both Owen and Becca seated on stools on either side of the standing Savior.
Savior: A show so big that it generates higher ratings than any sporting event, talk show, or game show on the planet. And it’s funny that I should mention game-shows, because tonight the Twilight Zone is going to take a page straight out of Deal or No Deal.
Savior thinks about it for a moment as he pats little Owen on his head.
Christian: Only I’m not a bald germaphobe and there are no suitcases to open. Instead my grandiose telecast is going to deal with even greater, more life altering CHOICES.
A truly depraved smile settles over his face as he now pats Becca on her tiny noggin as well.
Mark: I’m not liking where this is going at all.
Moore: And I have no idea where it’s going, so I don’t like it either. BESIDES, nobody brought me an ice-cream.
The careless, emotionally devoid Savior continues to speak while the kiddies eat their ice-creams, unaware of the danger their in.
Savior: Allow me for a moment to take you down memory lane. Many of you may recall a time where your hero Orlando Cruze was left incapable of competing in this ring. In fact, he was out of action for months only to make his triumphant return at Paranoia where he beat Lethal Weapon in the quote un quote “match of the year.”
Savior rolls his eyes before continuing, finding the prospect of Weapon and Cruze producing a legendary match to be preposterous.
Savior: But what was it that initially made him leave? Was it some type of physical injury that took him away from you fans? No, because injuries or no injuries, Orlando continues to compete without regard for the condition of his body, obsessed with the World title instead of his own well being. Some may consider it admirable that he shortens his career for a championship but I just find it stupid.
His words are blanketed by boos.
Christian: Orlando wasn’t physically crippled, he was mentally and emotionally stunned, that’s why he couldn’t drag himself to this building any longer. But for those of you with short term memories, you might be asking, “what damaged Cruze’s soul so? What tore him up inside and continues to tear away at him every time he gets out of bed in the morning?” It was a choice, a choice only a loving father could make.
He licks his lips in anticipation although he continues to be bombarded with obscenities from the fans.
Savior: Many years ago Kloe Cruze was in a car accident while she happened to be pregnant with twins. Unfortunately as a result of the injuries she sustained the “doctors” told Orlando that he had to make a CHOICE, one that would ruin his life FOREVER. It’s a choice that till this day still haunts him. He was asked to decide which of his children would live, and which of them would DIE.
As he makes this statement he turns his attention between Becca and Owen, who are still blissfully ignorant of what Savior is getting at.
Christian: And he made the CHOICE. But every waking moment of his life he wonders if he made the right decision. Well tonight, I’m going to give him another crack at it sort of speak. I’m going to give Cruze internal peace by fixing his mistakes of the past. He may have been powerless to stop what happened back then, but here on the Twilight Zone he’ll have the power to save not just one, but both of his children.
Horror sweeps through the Manhattan Center as Savior puts his palms on both of the children’s shoulders. They look up at him awkwardly, as if suddenly realizing something is wrong. Christian lifts the microphone back to his twisted lips.
Christian: Cruze, I know that you think having that World Heavyweight title is just going to wash the pain away, but all it does is put more stress on a family that has already suffered enough. Its time someone made you realize your priorities Cruze, it’s time you put your family first. So here’s the DEAL, you come out here and give me what’s rightfully mine, the World Heavyweight Championship, or I force you to decide which one of one of your kids leaves this ring tonight in one piece..
His flesh trembles with hostility as he paces behind the worried children, his threat quite sincere.
Comeau: He wouldn’t go that far.
Moore: He’s not going to do something to one of those kids is he?
Savior turns towards the nearest camera, stepping forward so that it has a close up of his ravenous eyes.
Savior: I asked you on the last Riot! how much you were willing to sacrifice for that title, and now comes the ultimate test. Are you willing to pick which child feels my wrath, or are you ready to give back what you STOLE from me?
Every word sounds truly psychotic as it emanates from the Omnipotent Opportunist.
Christian: Decisions, decisions Cruze, the clock is ticking, this is a limited time offer.
He steps towards little Becca, pulling back on her chin so her terrified face looks up into Christian’s.
Savior: My patience is starting to wear thin Cruze, I could just SNAP at any minut….
Orlando: ENOUGH, enough God dammit, let her go.
The stunned crowd cheers at the sight of Orlando Cruze as he appears on the stage, the World title hanging from the hand opposite the one clutching the microphone. A sobbing Sallie and Kloe stand behind him as he points towards the ring at the twisted Rising Phoenix.
Cruze: This has gone too far Christian. Let my kids go and we’ll settle this like men you coward.
Christian: Now, now Orlando, those aren’t the terms of the deal.
Savior reaches out and snatches hold of Owen’s wrist, yanking up on his arm so that he almost falls off of his stool. Cruze’s eyes widen with terror as he takes a few steps towards the ring.
Orlando: STOP! Let him go you BASTARD!
Savior: THEN GIVE ME WHAT I WANT! You’ll get your kiddies back unscathed if you hand over that World Championship.
The enraged Orlando takes a deep breath as he looks down at the World title hanging from his grasp then back into the faces of his terrified children. Sallie and Kloe are still weeping over what they’re seeing as they remain behind the back of the struggling Icon.
Christian: Tick…tock…tick…tock…what’s it going to be Cruze?
He runs his finger under the jaw of the horrified Becca. After only a second’s thought a highly emotional Orlando looks up into Savior’s face.
Orlando: You win Christian…I’ll give you the World title.
Boos escalate from the fans who are downright enraged by this announcement. Savior smirks, letting Becca go.
Savior: I knew you’d make the right decision…
A depressed Orlando starts to make his way down the ramp with the belt thrust out in front of him until Christian holds his palm up in protest.
Christian: HOLD IT! Do you think I’m stupid? I don’t want you to bring that belt to me, I want your wife to bring me MY World Heavyweight title.
Orlando stops on the stage, becoming defiant.
Orlando: Your out of your damned mind if you think I’m going to let….
Suddenly Kloe places her hand on Orlando’s shoulder, causing him to turn towards his loving wife who sadly takes the World Championship out of his palm.
Cruze: Kloe, no.
Kloe: It’s what needs to be done.
She starts towards the ring with Orlando’s World title hanging from her grasp, Cruze absolutely powerless to do anything about it. Savior is chuckling as he stays between the kids and the approaching Kloe, who cautiously makes her way up the steps into the ring. As soon as she enters she holds the belt out begrudgingly towards Savior who smirks all the wider.
Savior: No, you don’t get off that easy. I want you to put the belt around my waist.
This demand is met with even more boos as Christian turns his back to Kloe who looks to be in absolute disgust. She trembles as she looks towards Orlando who is shaking his head then forces herself to begin putting the World title around Christian’s mid-section. He laughs all the while as the belt is snuggly fitted in front of his gut. He runs his palm over the golden plate upon turning towards a saddened, angered Kloe.
Christian: Alright, I’m a man of my word. CRUZE, your kids are free….
With an outward extension of his palm he motions towards the two tikes in their stools, Orlando, Kloe, and Sallie all taking a collective sigh of relief.
Savior: And Orlando, I’m glad you finally made the right decision.
A deep laughter emanates from his lungs as he backs away from the kids, Orlando immediately storming the ring. He slides in just as Christian rolls out of harm’s way, backing towards the barricade then jumping over it into the sea of screaming spectators. The World Championship glistens around his waist as he backs up through the crowd, palms lifted and head tilted, giving Cruze a sympathetic gaze. The Icon has stopped, no longer pursuing Savior in favor of checking on his children to ensure they are alright.
Becca pulls away from him and runs to her sobbing mother, Sallie having just entered the ring. Rage is taking hold of the rightful World Champion as he turns to the crowd and the disgusting human being who is now holding his title.
COMMERCIAL BREAK
IWC…..At least there are no dragons
JASON WHEELER VS. JOHNNY KINGDOM
“The End of All Hope” starts to play over the PA system before the name “Wheeler” flashes over the big screen. At the sight of this the fans cannot help but to erupt, rising to their feet with their arms held high as Jason Wheeler strolls onto the stage, overlooking his screaming admirers. He crouches briefly while eying the ring in a cat like manner and now pounces down the ramp. He reaches the ringside area and slides in under the ropes, crawling across it then doing a headstand before nipping up onto his feet. The Black Cat jumps to a turnbuckle, looking out over the crowd who is relishing this opportunity to see the former six time SCW World Champion.
Mark: And here we go with one of the biggest IWC matches to date as “The Black Cat” Jason Wheeler makes his way to the ring for singles competition against Johnny Kingdom.
Moore: Careful you don’t let Wheeler cross in front of you, you’ll get bad luck. Te-he.
Comeau: Shoot yourself, please. Wheeler has been really climbing the ranks since his arrival in the IWC, as he’s raked up victories against Robin Brooks, Christian Savior, Phantom, Psycho, and pushed the World Champion to his absolute limit. Is Johnny Kingdom going to be able to derail his momentum?
Susie: If Wheeler is derailed I hope he isn’t carrying any oil.
Wheeler prepares himself for this encounter by doing some odd stretches, asking official Wright to step in and aid him. The referee is perplexed as Wheeler places his leg over top of his shoulder and begins to use the official as a post to stretch his calf muscles. There is some laughter from the crowd as Wright awkwardly shifts his eyes back and forth.
WAKE UP
The crowd jumps from their seats at the sound of the Lost Prophets and grow even more irrational upon seeing Johnny Kingdom saunter through the curtains to the stage. A pompous expression resides on his face although he’s still understandably simmering over the events of earlier tonight. He progresses down the ramp rather bitterly, eyeing the fun loving Wheeler as he hops onto the apron. Once again he’s adorned in a dark sleeveless t-shirt spelling out “Poor Xavier” while “Kingdom” is written in gold down the sides of his synthetic pants. On this evening he doesn’t much care about his personal appearance and seems more predisposed with getting this match over with.
Comeau: Johnny coming out here a bit more determined than normal after what happened earlier in the night.
Moore: What?
Mark: How can you have forgotten this easily?....Oh wait, I forgot who I was talking to.
The Team Leader slips through the ropes finding himself almost eye to eye with the Black Cat, who waves to him affectionately. The bell rings as both men begin to circle each other to some fanfare from the crowd.
Comeau: Here we go, arguably two of the greatest World Champions of our time about to hook up.
Moore: Only one can be the greatest, the other has to settle for second greatest.
Mark: In your idiocy you speak slightly the truth.
Wheeler and Kingdom step forward slowly, interlocking arms in your basic collar elbow only for Johnny to shove his lighter opponent backwards across the ring into the ropes.
Comeau: Your basic start to this encounter with Wheeler and Kingdom tying up….
Before Comeau can finish his sentence Kingdom breaks the collar elbow and chops Jason viciously across the sternum. He now begins to jab him over and over again right across the face, knocking him towards the turnbuckle. A stunned Wheeler falls against the corner for support, surprised by the aggressive start that Kingdom has gotten off to.
Comeau: Looks like I spoke too soon.
Susie: The fact that you speak at all is horrible. Te-he, I made myself sound like a bitch.
Kingdom charges in and drives his knee right into Wheeler’s ribcage, doubling him over as a result before he’s slugged hard across the jaw. He now takes Wheeler by the wrist, dragging him forward out of the turnbuckle into an attempted fireman’s takedown. However, Jason flips forward out of the takedown and lands on his feet. He then turns and bolts at the kneeling Kingdom, delivering a vicious front dropkick right to the side of his skull.
Moore: This is off the hook. What does that mean? Why doesn’t somebody just hang the blasted phone back up?
Comeau: You’re an idiot.
The stiff strike causes Kingdom to roll across the ring and onto the apron, beginning to stand up behind the ropes. As soon as he gets to his feet Wheeler comes charging at the turnbuckle behind his back. He steps up it then launches himself off the top rope, twisting upside down in mid-air then connecting with a kick over the cables right to the back of Johnny’s head. The shot causes Kingdom to crash to the outside of the ring while Wheeler lands on the inside of the canvas to a loud reception from the fans.
Mark: Beautiful kick by Wheeler.
Moore: It was almost as beautiful as my earlobes.
Comeau: But nowhere near as dirty.
Wheeler springs to his feet as Kingdom starts to stand up on the outside of the ring, holding the back of his head. The former 6 time SCW World Champion surprisingly steps back, graciously allowing the Team Leader to re-enter the ring. His arms are thrust out to his sides and his head is tilted, observing Johnny as he rolls back into the squared circle. From his knees Kingdom glares at Wheeler, scrutinizing him with his glare. Finally he gets to his feet, approaching Wheeler as the two begin to circle each other. This time a smirk is present on Kingdom’s features before both men lunge forward into yet another collar elbow.
Jason quickly tries to drop down into an arm drag yet can’t get Johnny over. The size of Kingdom is too much for Wheeler to flip over with ease, Johnny taking him around the far side of the face, pulling him up to his feet. This grasp on Wheeler’s skull allows Kingdom to pull him forward into a front chancery, Johnny setting up for the Exodus Finale.
Comeau: Kingdom already setting up for the Exodus Finale!
Moore: Is it going to be as big as a firework finale? Like my uncle’s firework finale where he gets naked and plays with sparklers?
Mark: This is all something you need to be discussing with a councilor and one of those molestation dolls.
The crowd is screaming as Wheeler is hoisted into the air for the Brainbuster DDT but surprisingly floats over his opponent. He lands behind Johnny then jumps into the air, landing on his shoulders with his shins. He drops forward and pulls Kingdom down into a modified head scissors, sending him flipping forward. The crowd is stunned as Johnny rolls forward across the canvas right onto his feet, then turns towards Jason who springs into the air leveling him with a dropkick. The Team Leader tumbles to the canvas, rolling under the ropes to the outside of the ring. A bit miffed Johnny stands on the mats, glaring at the condescending smile across Wheeler’s face.
Comeau: Wheeler just too quick for Kingdom.
Susie: This is just like a panda fighting a cheetah, which sounds so CUTE.
Kingdom slowly pulls himself up onto the apron, glaring over the ropes into the face of a smiling Wheeler who suddenly rushes forward at his opponent. Instead of graciously allowing Johnny to enter the ring he drops into a baseball slide between his legs, landing on the mats behind the former ULW World Champion. He reaches out to grab Kingdom’s ankle only to have his opponent jump into the air and fly over the top rope. He twists his body as he holds onto the top rope, swinging around and driving his boots through the ropes right into Wheeler’s face. The crowd pops at the sight of Johnny using speedy, acrobatic moves himself to match the nimble Black Cat.
Comeau: Nice move by Kingdom, the slingshot dropkick through the ropes. He’s showing that he can be as quick as his opponent.
Moore: Awww, Johnny is almost the total package, if only he had hair he’d be a triple threat.
Johnny rolls backwards across the ring to his feet then extends his arms out to his sides with a tilted head, mocking Wheeler’s earlier behavior. Jason leans on the announce table he was knocked into, glaring at his opposition with a feint smile of his own. He now rushes at the ring, sliding in under the ropes when Kingdom pounces on him, delivering right hand after right hand directly to his jaw. The nimble Wheeler is whipped across the ring into the opposite cables, bouncing off then coming back in at Johnny who turns and bends forward for a back drop. Jason spins his back to Johnny, falling spine first against his back as the Team Leader stands up. This sends Jason into a flip, landing directly on his feet as Kingdom turns to him in time to spot a roundhouse kick coming his way.
At the last second Kingdom ducks the kick, causing Jason to go into a spin that ends with his back facing his opponent. Johnny takes him around the waist and without even dropping back, throws Wheeler over his head into a German suplex. To a loud reception the Black Cat lands right on his feet, Johnny realizing this as he drops down into a sideways roll, trying to knock his opponent’s legs out from beneath him. Before he can connect with his shins Jason dives over him and tucks into a roll of his own, ending up back on his feet.
Comeau: Neither man able to hit an offensive maneuver.
Moore: This is like a carousel; it just keeps going round and round and round…
Mark: Stop before I vomit.
Susie: So? I do that every meal.
Wheeler rushes towards a rising Kingdom, stepping over the back of his neck, now seated across it. Kingdom continues to stand with Jason now seated across the back of his shoulders, looking for some type of roll up or leg scissors. Before this happens Johnny wedges his hands to Wheeler’s back side, pushing him up and over his head, causing him to land right in front of him.
Before he can even brace himself Johnny places the Black Cat in a dragon sleeper, perhaps setting up for the reverse DDT. That’s until he lifts Wheeler up into a reverse suplex then steps under him as he lands on his shoulders in a fireman’s carry.
Kingdom looks on the verge of hitting a death valley driver until both arms are caught in the anatomy of Wheeler, who pulls him down into a crucifix pinfall.
1
2
Johnny rolls backwards out of the pinning position while Wheeler dives at him with a leg lariat. The Team Leader ducks it, wedging his back to Jason’s then pulling him down into a back slide pinfall.
1
2
The surprised Wheeler kicks out, dropping over onto his feet while the Team Leader jumps to his. Both men have their fists clinched, ready to continue going at it only to have them freeze in these poses. They glare into each other’s plotting eyes with a good old fashioned face off.
Comeau: And they just continue to counter until we find ourselves in a stalemate.
Susie: A stalemate? Gross. That’s necrophilia.
Mark: Uh…… …… …..yeah.
A rousing ovation commences from the crowd as the two continue to stand like statues, waiting for the other to blink. That’s when Wheeler makes the first move, charging in at Kingdom who catches him coming with a drop toe hold. Jason crashes into the canvas as Johnny stands up at his side, then lunges into the air with a forward flip. He comes crashing down spine first into the canvas after missing a flipping senton splash.
As soon as he sits up Wheeler steps to his side, wrapping his legs around Kingdom’s arm then diving over his shoulders, catching the other one. He pulls Johnny completely over into an arm wrench inside cradle pin.
1
2
Johnny kicks out, dropping to his knees and grabbing one of Wheeler’s wrists, pulling his arm up from the canvas. He causes Jason to flip over onto his knees then steps over his shoulders, draping his arms over his knees in a camel clutch position. Kingdom drops forward, pushing the back of Wheeler’s head into the canvas as well as his shoulders.
Mark: Gedo clutch!
Susie: Gedo? Like the lizard from those insurance ads?
Comeau: That’s a Gecko on the Geiko commercials.
Moore: You lost me.
The referee makes the count to loud squeals from the onlookers.
1
2
Wheeler kicks out, dropping over onto his knees behind the crawling Kingdom before rushing forward and stepping onto his back. Jason stands on Johnny’s spine long enough to flip off it into a standing moonsault. He catches a lot of air time but that proves to be to his detriment as it gives Kingdom time to roll onto his back with his knees raised. Groans emanate from the fans as Wheeler crashes sternum first into Johnny’s lifted kneecaps.
Mark: Wheeler flying high but it wasn’t worth the landing.
Moore: He hurt himself on that one.
Comeau: Obviously.
The fans are still sympathetic to the vicious bump that Wheeler just took, rolling across the canvas gripping at his sternum in horrific pain. He falls against the ropes, instinctively rising to his feet while Kingdom kneels in front of him. Somehow his anguish gives him the drive to charge at his opponent only for Johnny to dive forward head first right into Jason’s sternum. The headbunt actually picks the Black Cat up off of his feet, sending him flipping backwards. He crashes into the canvas across his stomach, looking as if all the wind has been knocked from his body. After connecting with this move Kingdom falls spine first to the ropes, trying to catch his breath.
Susie: Talk about using your head!
Comeau: Give me those bad pun cue cards.
Moore: No! They make me sound super smarmy.
Jason just rolls to his back when Kingdom dives into the air, landing knee first right against his sternum. The impact causes Wheeler to grimace and convulse, his chest enflamed with pain. Johnny crawls up behind him, pulling Jason to his seat then establishing a modified abdominal stretch.
Mark: Wise choice in submission by Kingdom, the abdominal stretch really targeting Wheeler’s battered sternum.
Moore: I like it because it looks pretty.
Comeau: Wonderful.
Screams of pain emanate from Wheeler’s body as it is twisted violently at the hands of the intense Team Leader. Kingdom is trying his best to earn the submission, finding himself closer and closer given the damage inflicted on his opponent’s chest. A good majority of the fans are slapping the barricades and screaming for Wheeler to get up as he slowly begins to progress towards his feet. He causes Johnny to have to stand up as well behind him, trying to maintain the hold.
Somehow the Black Cat finds the energy, some of which supplied by the fans to reach his feet. That’s when Kingdom breaks the hold and shoves him forward sternum first right into a nearby turnbuckle. Jason bounces off the corner hard, stumbling backwards into Kingdom who spins him around and places him in a front chancery. Wheeler is now hoisted into the air and driven down sternum as well as face first into the canvas with an inverted suplex face buster.
Susie: PINK FLOYD!!
Comeau: Johnny again going to the sternum this time with a vicious sternum buster.
This methodical assault continues as Kingdom slips over Wheeler’s back, pulling him up into a camel clutch. He rears back on the chin and thus stretches the muscles in the chest, inflicting even further damage. Kingdom pulls so far back on Jason’s head that he’s able to tuck it under his armpit, applying a camel clutch, dragon sleeper combination.
A sizeable chunk of the fanbase are again going rallying in support behind Wheeler while the ardent Team Leader supporters sit on their hands. Even after suffering the modified suplex slam the former 6 time SCW Champion begins to feed off of the crowd’s emotion. He shakes his fists out to his sides as he tries to force not only his own weight to his feet, but the weight of Kingdom as well who remains seated across his kidneys.
Mark: I have no idea how he’s doing this but Jason Wheeler is trying to block the pain and get to his feet.
Moore: This is super human. And not the crappy super human like in the Dark Knight, but cool super human like in Elektra.
Comeau: You have LOST all speaking privileges.
Jason continues to force himself upwards with Kingdom continuing to apply pressure via the dragon sleeper. He has firm control of his smaller opponent at this point before Wheeler jumps into the air, flipping backwards and wrapping his legs around Kingdom’s neck. He pushes himself up in order to hit a leg scissors only for Kingdom to drop to his knees, slamming the Black Cat down sternum first into the canvas. His legs unwrap themselves from around Johnny’s neck and he again writhes in anguish, his arms crossed over his possibly shattered chest.
Susie: QUEEN LATIFAH!
Comeau: Yes, it’s violent, but not violent enough to ever scream that name on our shows again.
Moore: But her boobies are huuuuuggeee.
Mark: True, and they’re very intimidating. Wheeler again dropped chest first into the ring, how much more can his body tolerate in this match?
After being slammed face first into the ring he tries to get back his bearings, turning towards the corner. He just begins to stand up when Kingdom steps in and kicks him hard to the chest, knocking him off of his feet into almost a backwards flip over the top rope. Johnny leads Wheeler away from the ropes and drags him forward into his shoulders, placing him in another fireman’s carry, preparing to slam his opposition down yet again into the canvas. Wheeler elbows him to the skull several times though, trying to free himself before pushing his light body up off of Kingdom’s shoulders. He twists his body in mid-air, landing in a seated position across Kingdom’s throat then dropping back into a snap hurricarana.
Kingdom slams hard into the canvas across the back of his shoulders, Jason originally going for the pin but finding his chest in too much pain. As a result he crumbles to the canvas, holding his chest in a horrid condition. After being spiked on his head Kingdom is left unable to press the advantage he had going. He tries to stand up as Wheeler does the same, rushing towards his stooped forward opponent’s back. A lariat is thrown at the back of Jason’s head only for him to duck it at the last second. Kingdom spins around to face his opponent who lunges into the air with a jumping knee strike right to his adversary’s jaw.
Comeau: Big knee strike from Wheeler, possibly giving him the time he needs to heal up the wounds inflicted on his sternum.
Moore: I have plenty of wounds on my chest, mostly bite marks.
Mark: Don’t worry, I’ll put rubbing alcohol on them backstage like always.
Susie: Bleed your kind heart Mark.
Jason is crouched over upon landing on his feet, his palm rubbing at his damaged chest. All eyes are on Kingdom as he painstakingly rolls to his feet and steps towards Wheeler only to be grabbed by his wrist. He whips Johnny into the opposite cables, Kingdom bouncing off and coming back at the 6 time champ who lunges into the air for a leap frog. However, Kingdom steps under him and catches Jason across his shoulders, quickly gorilla pressing him up into the air then dropping him down sternum first into the canvas.
Wheeler’s body hits the ring hard, causing him to roll to his back while Kingdom steps up the turnbuckle. His tired yet motivated frame reaches the top rope as he turns and launches himself into a 450 splash, crashing down right into Jason’s raised knees. His sternum slams hard into his opponent’s kneecaps, causing him to roll to his back writhing in anguish.
Mark: Johnny being spoon fed a taste of his own medicine!
Moore: Was he suppose to land on Wheeler’s knees?
Johnny rolls across the canvas to his back, both arms draped over his chest, trying to protect his damaged sternum. Like a shark smelling blood Jason steps over his laid out opposition, slipping through the ropes to the apron then springing to the top rope. He bounces off and flips forward into a springboard 450 splash of his own, going for the Night Fall. Johnny rolls out of the way at the last second, causing Wheeler to duck his head at the last second and roll forward across the canvas.
The quick Wheeler reaches his feet when Johnny comes charging up behind him, Jason having just enough time to turn and catch his inbound opponent. He wedges his hands to Johnny’s chest then lifts him into the air, turning and slamming the Team Leader down with the Claim to Fame (Sky High Press). The crowd is going bonkers as the official makes the count.
1
2
NO! Johnny launches his shoulder from the ring, leaving Wheeler exasperated.
Comeau: Neither man hit the 450, but Wheeler did catch Kingdom with one of his most impressive moves, almost leading to the pinfall.
Moore: Wow, there’s so much action in this match. Just like a James Woods film.
Mark: Ugh….you mean Jon Woo!
Susie: Te-he, his name is fun.
The crowd is as shocked as Wheeler, both men remaining sprawled across the canvas in an exhausted heap. Finally Wheeler rolls backwards to his knees unaware that Kingdom has nipped up to his feet in front of him. He lands with great grace and then steps forward going for an upward punt kick right to Jason’s face. The quick Wheeler catches Johnny’s foot before it could connect, standing up and holding onto the leg of his opponent before turning and sweeping the other leg out from under him. Johnny crashes onto his back and Wheeler now performs a standing corkscrew moonsault that misses its mark. Kingdom rolled out of the way in the nick of time causing Jason to crash across his sternum and stomach across the canvas.
He painstakingly pushes himself upwards when Kingdom steps in and delivers a vicious punt kick right between his eyes. The fans are stunned by the viciousness of this kick as Johnny now places him in a front chancery, forcing his opposition to his feet then lifting him into the air for the Exodus Finale.
Comeau: Kingdom connected with that brain scrambling kick and now he’s going for the Exodus Finale!
Moore: It’s a finale of biblical proportions. Hehehehe, I’m smart.
Jason is upside down with the blood rushing to his head, Kingdom about to drag him to the canvas and finish him off when Wheeler floats over his shoulder. He lands on his feet behind Kingdom and now grabs hold of his pants, rolling him up into a school boy while a figure comes rushing down the ramp, it’s Pat Evans.
Comeau: Kingdom’s Exodus Finale reversed into the school boy, but what is Pat Evans doing out here? Hasn’t he already caused enough trouble?
Moore: He’s just like Denis the Menace, just now as adorable.
The fans are screaming as Wheeler puts all his weight down on the back of Kingdom’s thighs, the referee jumping into the fray to make the count. Just as his hand slaps the canvas Pat jumps to the apron, trying to slip through the ropes to stop Wheeler and ruin this match.
1
2
Evans is almost in the ring when Riggs grabs him from behind, dragging him down off of the apron then popping him right across the jaw. Evans is knocked out cold as the referee makes the third and final slap of the canvas.
3!
Everyone in the building is in disbelief as Jason Wheeler has just picked up a huge victory against Kingdom, the greatest ULW World Champion of all times. Kingdom sits up, his eyes bulging from their sockets and his jaw hanging open, unable to believe that he was just rolled up for the victory.
Comeau: Wheeler has done it, he’s DONE IT, he’s won this battle of the TITANS!
Moore: What a win for Wheeler. Did you notice how many “w’s” that last sentence had, I’m a like a poet.
Jason gets to his feet and immediately drops to his knees, raising both arms up high in victory while the crowd lavishes him with praise. At the same time Kingdom is pulling himself up with the use of the ropes, leaning spine first against them and clapping his hands for Wheeler. Evans scoots away from Riggs on his posterior, holding his jaw while the Painted Warrior looks with admiration upon his associate in the ring.
Mark: Wheeler on an absolute roll, he beat Christian Savior last week, he almost defeated Cruze the week before, and now he’s picked up a win over a sure fire legend in Johnny Kingdom.
Moore: What can’t this guy do, besides see a dentist over those blasted fangs…
Dan Douglas: STOP, STOP, STOP….HOLD THE PRESSES.
The reaction from the crowd is drastically altered as Wheeler looks over his shoulder towards the entry way. Riggs, who had climbed up onto the apron is now staring towards the big screen as well, which has an image of the IWC President Dan Douglas’ face stretched across it. Johnny was in the middle of making his way up the ramp but has stopped to observe the screen as well.
Dan: I hate to spoil this moment, to ruin all this ballyhoo, but I cannot allow this flagrant violation of my authority to go unpunished.
Comeau: What is he going on about now?
Riggs has stepped to Wheeler’s side, helping him to his feet and patting him on the back as both men continue to observe Douglas. The President is acting as if he’s deeply saddened and distressed by what he’s about to say from the comfort of his dressing room, surrounded by security.
Dan: It deeply, deeply troubles me to do this, but unfortunately, Jason Wheeler, I cannot allow your victory to stand here tonight…
Outrage sweeps through the crowd and through those gathered in the ring.
Douglas: I made it quite clear that if Riggs were to be at ringside during this match then Jason Wheeler would be disqualified on the SPOT. And not only was Riggs at ringside, but he also physically got involved in the outcome of this contest….
A smiling Evans remains seated on his rump and pointing to his jaw.
Dan: Therefore, thanks to RIGGS, Jason Wheeler, you are hereby disqualified, and it makes me sick to say this, but Johnny Kingdom, you are hereby the victor of this match.
The gathered masses have no idea how to react to this move, given their love for Kingdom and their equal appreciation of Wheeler. Many are booing this decision while Kingdom thrusts his arms out to his sides, staring towards the big screen.
Kingdom: What the fuck? I don’t want the win like this.
Riggs’ head hangs in sadness, realizing that he just unintentionally robbed Wheeler of a victory. Jason looks up into his partner’s face in absolute shock, stunned by the fact that Riggs screwed him out of the biggest win of his IWC career. Riggs reaches down and places his hand on Jason’s shoulder only for him to brush it off, standing up and giving the Painted Warrior a piercing, furious glare.
Wheeler: WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING!?!
Riggs takes a deep breath, beginning to give an explanation before Wheeler turns his back towards him and starts towards the ropes. Evans remains seated at ringside laughing as hard as he possibly can while Kingdom makes his way up the ramp shaking his head, in disgust over what just transpired.
Douglas: Oh, and one more thing gentlemen, I had a bit of a brainstorm on how to properly get you all pumped up for the PPV. Or some people might insinuate that I’m booking this match to get you all worn out before the PPV, regardless it’s a brilliant idea because I came up with it. On the very next Riot!, we’re finally going to see the implosion of Johnny Kingdom and Orlando Cruze, because they will team up to defend the Tag Team titles against Jason Wheeler and Riggs.
A loud reaction is heard from the crowd, who are positively ecstatic at the prospect of this tag team encounter on the next Riot! over the gold. A fuming Wheeler stops just a few inches in front of the ropes, looking over his shoulder into the face of Riggs, both men now giving each other an untrusting glare.
Comeau: What a strange series of events here tonight on Riot! Jason Wheeler had the victory only to have it stripped from him by Douglas due to Riggs being at ringside. But now Jason and Riggs must work together next week to challenge for the IWC Tag Team Titles.
Moore: That’s crazier than my cat dragging its ass across the carpet!
The fans are still going absolutely nuts over this announcement as Riggs and Wheeler exchange a long, awkward stare, realizing they will team up for the tag titles two weeks before their collision at the Overbooked Extravaganza. Kingdom watches them both from the ramp, shaking his head in frustration.
FADE TO BLACK