Our story begins at the end of a very trying day for our hero. Her nerves being shot, she was a bit touchy when it came to anything out of the distinctly ordinary. Thus, when the doorbell rang, and no one had ordered pizza, she became highly suspicious. But alas, it was none other than the AWA’s own Jenny Tull, come to collect an exclusive interview with this relative newcomer.

Ah, poor Jenny. So young.

.scene//__what she didn‘t miss

A deafening crash was the only response to the doorbell. If it had been up to Mrs. Thomas, it would never have been installed. Then again if it were up to Mrs. Thomas, their front yard would still be a live mine field.

“Lielee, there’s some chick here to see you.” Jay called up the stairs. He hadn’t bothered investigating the crash. Random outbursts of violence were a common occurrence in the Thomas household.

“Is she hot?” Jalie called back. Jay surveyed the woman standing outside on the porch.

“Not bad. Sorta looks like a fish but… Not bad.”

Jalie thundered down the stairs and came careening to a halt just at the foot of them. Her waist length hair was braided along the top and pulled back into a tight ponytail. She wore loose fit jeans and her top was a ragged SPCA ‘Spay and Neuter‘ t-shirt, tied into a small knot at the back to show off the black cross tattooed near her hip.

“Ah, but is she vulnerable?” She questioned.

The door was finally pulled open and Jenny was led into the house by Jay, who gave her a firm slap on the ass on his way into the kitchen for a beer.

“Hey I know you. You’re the vagina lady from AWA.”

Jenny turned to glimpse Hobo Nick standing in the doorway. Gripping his peanut butter and banana sandwich and scratching furiously within his shorts with his free hand, he looked charming as ever.

“Hey, any luck with those kids that stole our lawn chairs?” Jalie asked him. He grinned, revealing yellowed food-ridden teeth and making his appearance even more attractive than previously thought possible.

“I slashed their bike tires and told them what really happened to sweet Mrs. Carrodyn’s missing cat.” He replied.

“Nick, if I loved you any more I wouldn’t be able to kill you when the time came. The cat, though… Why not just make the trip to Chinatown? Or Taco Bell. Ehh, to each his own… I don’t wanna know.” Jalie said. By now, Jenny looked thoroughly shaken. But, who could blame her? The few friends this family does have remain as such simply because they’re nearly as eccentric as the Thomas’. Jenny, however, bit back her fear and dared to interrupt the musings of Jalie and her indispensable manager. At the sound of her name being uttered Jalie turned to face Jenny. Whether she was furious, amused, or merely feeling sick was hard to tell. Nonetheless, Jenny continued on.

“I’m here for an interview, Lexus Malone sent me. She wanted me to be the first to get your thoughts on returning to the ring. But, I mean if this is a bad time, I could come back…” Jenny trailed off. Jalie was laughing.

“Malone must really despise you. That’s like handing a retarded kid a bag of raw meat and telling him to go play with the neighbors Dobermans.”

Jenny gaped at her, unsure if she was supposed to inject her disagreement… But, when she gave it some thought, she seemed to realize that Jalie was most likely correct. Being the kind hearted soul that she is, though, Jalie opted to make her feel at home. And to give her the interview she’s already risked her life to secure. Jalie took a seat on the couch and instructed Jenny to do the same. After a few moments of awkward staring Jenny decided to get on with the questioning.

“Okay, well, Jalie the first and most obvious question is probably what have you been doing in your off time? It’s been quite a while since you were last seen in the ring, besides standing ringside with Seth.” She began.

“Ehh, I played a lot of video games. And I drank. And I met this really cool Japanese dude in Wal-Mart.” Jalie told her.

“So… You haven’t spent any time training? Like, at all?” Jenny questioned.

“Training? Why the fuck would I train? You act like this wrestling thing is difficult. All I do is go out there and do the same shit I’ve always done. Only difference is there’s a couple technicalities. But still the way I see it, if you beat the hell out of people for a living, and can’t get arrested for it, that’s something to be thankful for.” She replied. Jenny apparently decided to move on to another topic, as this one obviously wasn’t going anywhere.

“Do you have any goals when it comes to your return? A title you may have had your eye on, a main event, anything like that?”

“Everyone always asks me that. The answer is no… I never have any goals. None of the titles here mean shit to me. I know I’m damn good and I don’t need a piece of metal to prove it. As for main events, we all know that’ll happen eventually. I don’t really see what the big deal is. I’ve been in enough of them already. Why should I care when my match takes place so long as I get to crack a few skulls? Planning is pointless, anyway. Planned marriages… Planned children… It all gets fucked up anyway. So if you have no plans, no expectations, you’ll never be disappointed.”

Jenny contemplated this for a moment then shrugged. “Well, I guess that’s one way to look at it.”

“Ah, indeed. But look how time flies, and you’re bothering me already. Why don’t you move along before I leave boot-prints on your face?” Jalie asked, smiling sweetly. Jenny looked relatively unnerved as she got up to leave. Jalie leaned back into the couch as she heard the door close, sighing. The memories of the business were coming back to her. Trailed by paparazzi, interrogated, and bossed around by a manager whose ego weighed more than half the guys on the roster. Yet she couldn’t stay away, despite warnings from her doctors pertaining to her mental health. The business was what had given her an outlet, years ago when she was back in the public. Besides, it was only part time… Right? Surely she can withhold her temper every once in a while.

At least, I hope so.

.scene//__what she didn‘t miss

“Oi, Carson! Bring me that bucket of blood!”

Cody came around the corner into the living room. Jalie was bringing up Halloween decorations from the basement. She’d demanded that Carson help, although he was reluctant to be anywhere near the infamous basement. He handed her a bucket filled with a deep red liquid.

“Where the hell do you get all this stuff? The shackles, the Hungarian instruments, the fake blood…” At the look on her face, Cody paused. “Eh, it is fake, right? I mean there’s like thirty buckets down there…”

“Yeah, sure.” Jalie replied, not catching his eye. The front door was heard opening and Brandi James appeared beside her a moment later. “What’s up?” She asked, eyeing the décor. Jalie smiled.

“Cody’s playing Jalie’s bitch for the day. Carmen lent him to me. She had some publicity thing in L.A… She’s modeling now, you know. Can’t say I approve… I mean, models… But, she’s happy. And we all know I’ll deal with shit I don’t like to make her happy.” Both women cast Carson a meaningful glance, but smirked.

“So you set for the match on Sunday? You were all gung ho to be in Showdown a week ago and then I didn’t hear a damn thing from you.” Brandi noted.

“I know, I know… I was busy. Sleeping. That, and I forgot until yesterday that I signed back on. Seth started talking about it and reminded me that I had a match. Which, by the way, I am more than ready for. Not like it’s that big of a deal. I feel bad for this girl. Occupational hazard though, I suppose. Every once in a while you’ll get booked against someone better than yourself. And, on the off chance you’re incredibly unlucky, it’ll be the best two women in the business. It’s no wonder she hasn’t shown her face in ages. Enough about her, though… I’m supposed to be getting dressed to go out to dinner with Seth. He won’t be here on Sunday, so he wants to congratulate me on winning my first match back.” Jalie said, smiling at the thought of her husband.

“Bit early for celebration, isn’t it?” Cody asked, smirking. He knew damn well the win wasn’t an issue. Jalie responded by throwing what appeared to be a shrunken head at him.

“I’ll see you two later, I’m gonna go get dressed.” She said. With that, she took off up the stairs, leaving the two of them amidst a pile of morbid curiosities.

.scene//__vs. kayleigh mason

Some people just have better luck than others. Some people win the lottery. Some, get booked against a returning Jalie Thomas; along with her best friend, Brandi James. Rotten luck, darling.

It is already incredibly obvious to those within the corporation that I, Jalie Thomas, do not need the help of Brandi James. Nor she mine. But the powers that be felt you needed a bit of an incentive to get off your ass and pay attention to a job that, may I remind you, you are getting paid to do. Management doesn’t like it when you don’t do what they’re paying you for. For instance, you don’t attract clients and your pimp bitchslaps you. You don’t dance well, the dollar bills in your g-string decrease. I do hope you understand me. I’m just trying to bring an example down to your level. Don’t get me wrong now, I understand you’re going for the classy attitude… The strong, business-like wife of a (so-called) powerful man. But that’s like me at a Presidential dinner. Some things just don’t fit. Still, whatever hardens your nipples I suppose. But what I’ve come to realize is that you will never be something you’re not, no matter how hard you try. And you are not high class material. Firstly, and perhaps most especially when it comes to professional wrestling.

Another nameless, faceless shadow making a rather poor attempt at world renown.

However, don’t expect much more reference from myself… Or Brandi, for that matter. She and I are on a different level. Purely, simply, the Goddesses of the squared circle. And sure as hell of the AWA. But keep trying. Maybe one day, far from now, you’ll be fit to shine my fucking boots.