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'the promo: episode three' (( 56 and 0. That’s not Bill’s wrestling record, I mean, 56 inch waist and zero exercise for nearly a year. But despite the lack of fitness and practice, Bill did a good job against Paul Dream on EWO’s first ever Violence. Bill did so well that not only did he beat Paul Dream so hard he couldn’t make the count, but he beat him twice, powerbombing him through a table. But even though Bill enjoyed beating Dream to a pulp, those extra few minutes in the ring caused what seems to be stress on his lower back. Bill has been lying in a hospital bed since Sunday night, he was taken there as a precaution by EWO’s medical team. The injury won’t give Bill any serious pain in the up-coming match, due to the powerful painkillers he’s been given. But long-term, he has to look towards losing some weight, or losing his career. On what seems to be a more pressing issue for the short-term, Bill was drawn in the Semi-Finals against his friend, Czecher. The two have never gone face to face in the ring before, and this looks to be a serious test for their friendship. But Czecher, true to his word, sticks by Bill and comes to visit him in the hospital. )) Czecher: Hi, I’m here to see my friend Bill, Bill Dynamite. Receptionist: Ok what’s your name? Czecher: Czecher… Receptionist: And your last name? Czecher: No that’s my name. Czecher. Receptionist: Listen, unless you play soccer for Brazil, you’ll have a first and a last name. Is your name Pele? Czecher: All right, my name is Kodak. Receptionist: All right, now you’re just being silly. Can I put you in my camera, Kodak? Czecher: Hespeler. Kodak Hespeler. I’m booked in. See, my name’s right there. Receptionist: Okay Mr Hespeler, go on through. Room 22A. Have a nice day, now. Czecher: Yeah you too… Damn lucky Captain Shovel retired. (( Czecher walks through the ward, shaking off the frustration of the receptionist. He walks down the plain corridor reading the door numbers. 20A, 20B, 22A… Bingo. He takes a deep breath and bursts in the door. Bill nearly shits himself and accidentally reclines his bed with the remote control. After recovering, Bill sits up and composes himself. )) Czecher: Bill… Bill: Czecher… What the hell are you doing here? Czecher: I’m here to see you, man. Here, I got you some grapes. Bill: I hate grapes. Czecher: Right, right. I do that every time don’t I? Bill: Yes. Yes you do. Czecher: How long you gonna be in here? Bill: My results should be back later today. I could be out of here by tonight. Czecher: That’s great. Bill: Yeah I was just about to get some sleep. Czecher: Yeah? Well no need. I’m here, so we can have some fun. Look what I got ya… Bill: … Jesus… Czecher: Monopoly… I know how you don’t like playing the U.S version, so I got you the LONDON VERSION!! Woohoo. Bill: (unenthusiastically) Woo. Monopoly. Czecher: That’s not all. Bill: It’s not? Oh joy. Czecher: I got you a little Teddy Beefeater to remind you of home AND… A banjo. Bill: SAVE IT! Save it. Please. No banjo. I’ll play monopoly, but no banjo. Czecher: Ok. Bill: Promise me? Czecher: Promise. No banjo. Bill: Ok. (( Bill grabs the banjo and places it slowly under the bed. As Czecher begins to set up the game of Monopoly, a pleasant looking nurse walks in with some blankets. )) Nurse: Hi Bill. You feeling Ok today? Bill: I’m much better, thanks Judy. Judy: And who’s your friend? Bill: My friend? Oh you’re talking about Czecher. He’s a pro wrestler too. Judy: Oh… How… Cute. (( Judy piles the blankets on a shelf and folds 1 or 2 into a wardrobe. )) Bill: Listen Czecher. I’d rather not have all this company. Czecher: What? Bill: I’d like to… Yunno… Be alone… Czecher: Oh… I’m following. Bill: Thanks. I knew you’d understand. Czecher: It’s cool. It’s cool. Bill: Great thanks. You know I don’t mean any offence by it, its just yunno… Czecher: Bill, I get it. It’s not a problem. Bill: Great. Czecher: Nurse, could you excuse us? Bill wants some alone time. Nurse: I’m sorry? Czecher: Just hit the bricks, honey. Okay? Jesus Christ. Can’t a guy just have some rest?! (( Judy slams the remainder of the blankets in the wardrobe and slams the door on her way out )) Czecher: There. All better? Bill: Oh God… Czechs… That’s not what I meant. Look, I’m still pissed with you about leaving me with the She-Man Mountain. But I’m a man. I can handle that… I’ve nearly recovered. So… I need to blow off some steam. How bout we take a walk or something? Czecher: Sounds good man. (( A few minutes later, Bill and Czecher are seen walking through the ward. Bill finds the time is now to touch upon a delicate subject )) Bill: Czecher, I got this problem with ‘Lil Bill’. I got this rash… (( Not that delicate subject )) Bill: I got this other problem. Let’s not pussyfoot around. We have a match on Sunday, against each other. This may be a lot tougher than just a wrestling match. We’re friends, it’s gonna be difficult. I’m a bad guy; you’re a good guy. I cheat; you do things the right way. Czecher: Yeah. That’s true. Bill: Now I’m sorry for getting Darkside involved in that match. But he was pissed with Scott Royal, and I knew that this could make your night a little easier. Czecher: Did you not think I could take Royal? Bill: Of course you could take Royal. My grandma could take Royal. Even worse, Dylan Dunn could take Royal. I just thought since Darkside wanted to get Royal back, I might as well give him some encouragement. At least that way, you’d have an even better chance of going through to the Semis. Czecher: Yeah but I wanted to do it on my own. You just pissed me off with that. I don’t need help. If I lose, I lose. But at least I can win or lose the right way. Bill: All right, point taken. It won’t happen again. Czecher: Thanks. (( As they chat away in deep conversation, they wander past a sign that says ‘Psychiatric Ward’ )) Bill: But we have a more pressing issue on Sunday night. I’m gonna give you the fight I give everyone else. I won’t go easy on you, and I know that you won’t go easy on me. But I’m not gonna cheap-shot you. If I beat you, it’ll be fair and square. I hope the same goes for you. Czecher: Deal. Bill: All right. I’m glad we got that cleared up. (( From behind Bill, comes a large nurse carrying a syringe. )) Large Nurse: C’mon Jack, let’s go. Bill: What? Large Nurse: You know you shouldn’t be out of your room. It’s unsafe in your condition. Bill: My condition? Large Nurse: And you (pointing at Czecher) you should be ashamed of yourself. Taking a psychiatric patient out of his ward. Bill: Psychiatric? Czecher: Whoa, you heard the lady, Jack. I suppose visiting time is over. I gotta run. See ya later. Bill: Czecher come back here! Large Nurse: C’mon now, Jack. Pill time. You like pill time. Bill: No wait. I’m Bill Dynamite… The Professional Wrestler? Large Nurse: A professional wrestler huh… Yesterday you wanted to be a fireman. Bill: What? No. Bill Dynamite. Wrestler, award winning actor. I’m gonna be the next Heavyweight Champion of the World! I have a match on Sunday. Large Nurse: Wrestler, actor and next Heavyweight Champion… Of course you are. If you have a match on Sunday, then we better get you some rest, Mr Sleepy-head. Here comes the aeroplane… (Plane noises as the syringe comes Bill’s way) Neeeeeaaaaaooooowwwww. Bill: No no no… You don’t understand… I’m… Well hello Mr Morphine!
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