[ Today's scene opens to exactly what Jimmy Stryker promised. The first Lesbian dating game show brought to you by the AWA productions. Actually AWA really doesn't know that they are sponsorign this show, but that detail will be left for Jimmy to explain to Lexus and Max. Jimmy is seen standing on the set wearing a dark grey suit, with a white shirt. He's approached by a beautiful blonde in a short simple black dress. He looks her over then gives her a hug. ]

Jimmy Stryker:"Ah, Lisa so nice to see you...."

[ He stepped back and licked his lips. ]

Jimmy Stryker:"What a hot bitch you are."

[ Lisa smiles and kisses Jimmy on his cheek.]

Lisa:"Why thank you Jimmy. So how is this going to work?"

[ Jimmy takes her hand, and they walk to the other side where a chair that looks like lips is set up.]

Jimmy Stryker:"I figure this, you sit your sexy ass on these lips, and we play it dating game orignal style. That way you won't see the hot chick you pick till you're face to face. After all we can't let physical beauty influence you. If you're like me, you don't care how annoying a bitch is, just as long as the ass is tight and she's good looking."

[ Jimmy chuckles as Lisa puts her hand on his shoulder.]

Lisa:"Ain't that the truth Jimmy.."

Jimmy Stryker:"You little minx...."

[ As Jimmy and Lisa speak Kasey walks up to Jimmy with a phone in his hand. ]

Kasey:"Jimmy..."

[ Kasey says a bit hestinately. Jimmy looks at the phone and then at Kasey. ]

Jimmy Stryker:"What is Brandi on the phone again bitching about something?"

Kasey:"No...it's worse."

Jimmy Stryker:"Worse? Who the hell can be worse then Brandi...because we all know how scared of Brandi you are.....fuckin' pussy."

[ Kasey hangs his head, and hands the phone to Jimmy, as he does he quietly says. ]

Kasey:"It's Jalie Thomas.."

[ laughing Jimmy takes the phone then talks ]

Jimmy Stryker:"Jalie...sorry shows full..."

[ Jimmy hangs up, and hands the phone back to Kasey.]

Jimmy Stryker:"And that's how you deal with bitches like Brandi James and Jalie Thomas."

[ He points at Kasey. ]

Jimmy Stryker:"Write that down..."

[ The phone begins to ring again, and Kasey notices the caller ID reads "Jalie". He looks at it, then at Jimmy. ]

Kasey:"Jimmy, Jalie is calling again...You shouldn't have hung up on her. I think you've only made her more angry."

[ Jimmy rolls his eyes. ]

Jimmy Stryker:"Let it go to voice mail. She'll get the hint we have no use for her. Not unless you're frightened of her as well?"

[ Kasey pauses then takes a breath.]

Kasey:"Well, I am.."

Jimmy Stryker:"Kasey, don't make me disown you as my assistant. Dude grow a fucking nut sack."

Kasey:"It's just that she's worse then the other one is."

Jimmy Stryker:"They both can literally blow me! Come, stop fuckin' around Kasey. This lovely lesbo needs a date."

[ Jimmy puts his arm around Lisa. ]

Jimmy Stryker:"Come sit down my dear."

Lisa:"Whatever you want Jimmy.."

Jimmy Stryker:"I'll remember that for later baby."

[ Lisa sits down, and Jimmy steps on the other side of the stage where three other Lesbian are seated the first one is a good looking red head wearing a black mini skirt and white lace bra top with 3 inch platform shoes, the other a sexy latino dressed in a shiny silver disco dress with see through spike heels to match, and the third a butch construction work look alike wearing a plaid shirt and faded jeans. Jimmy points to the manish looking lesbian, and looks at Kasey.]

Jimmy Stryker:"Ok,.....Kasey who the fuck let the dyke in? Did I not say sexy Lesbians? I mean if Lisa wanted to date someone that looked like a man, she would be dating me, God Damn it!"

Kasey:"Jimmy we had to be fair..."

Jimmy Stryker:"Fair? Now what if that lovely lesbian Lisa picks this thing you call a woman. Hell she looks more manly then Cody Carson."

Kasey:"Jimmy, isn't that an easy thing to do though, since Carson is a fem."

[ Jimmy nods and takes a piece of gum from his pants pocket, and pops it into his mouth.]

Jimmy Stryker:"True....but really...what the hell did I do to deserve this?"

Kasey:"Just make the best of it Jimmy, ok?'

Jimmy Stryker:"Fine, but it's not like I'll fucking like it."

Kasey:"Ok, fair enough everything is set now Jimmy...."

[ The camera light turns on, and Jimmy positions himself infront of the "Lesbian Dating Game" sign. He nods then points into the camera lens. ]

Jimmy Stryker:"Lesbianism, let's face it, is a godsend. Every man in the world is totally fascinated by those sisters of Sappho. I know I am. To have two girls doing wild things to each other with me in the sack is always amazing. And since most men never have the chance to get that experience. You know since they fucked up their lives and got married to early. They have to live vicariously through me. And tonight you shall. As AWA presents to you the first Lesbian Dating Game show."

[ The crowd applauds as Jimmy raises his hand up. The crowd begins to chant "Jimmy, Jimmy, Jimmy." Jimmy smirks then nods his head to the chants. Then continues to speak. ]

Jimmy Stryker:"Indeed, I am a genius....Now lets meet our contestants."

[ Jimmy walks towards the girls and sits in his chair. Then looks at a que card. ]

Jimmy Stryker:"Contestant number one...you're name is ?"

[ The red head smiles and winks at Jimmy. ]

Red Head:"It's Carly..."

Jimmy Stryker:"Well, Carly...It says here that you had you're first lesbian expiernce courtesy of your Girl Scout camp counselor. Is that correct?"

Carly:"Yes, that is true.."

Jimmy Stryker:"How old were you?"

Carly:"Fourteen..."

Jimmy Stryker:"Holy Christ, just fourteen...what did you start talking to other girls...thinking "gee, what if other girls liked other girls?" Or something like that?"

Carly:"No, it wasn't like that. We really didn't talk about sex per se. I didnt' even have the word lesbian in my vocabulary."

Jimmy Stryker:"Carly, I have to be honest with you. I'm not hearing enough sex stuff, and I'm sure it's also worrying Lisa who's behind that wall over there. Trust me, Lisa is a hot piece of ass, and if you go with her tonight then some lettuce munching will be going on. Am I wrong on that Lisa?"

[ The camera turns to Lisa who crosses her legs smiling. ]

Lisa:"Oh, trust me, we'll have a good time. You are not wrong Jimmy."

[ The camera moves back to Jimmy and Carly.]

Carly:"Jimmy, you're not giving me a chance!"

Jimmy Stryker:"Carly, Honey....It's Friday...My audience isn't looking for Oprah!....So what did your counselor look like? Was she cute?"

Carly:"Stunning."

[ Calry looks down the row at the manly looking lesbian, and says. ]

Carly:"I only went for the good-looking ones, Absolutely gorgeous."

Jimmy Stryker:"Hey, I hear ya baby...I don't even know why she's here."

[ Jimmy hangs his head for a moment, then picks it back up. ]

Jimmy Stryker:"Luckily, I don't really plan on talking to her...so please continue...So did she like just start to kiss you all the sudden or what? "

Carly:" I think I started kissing her first. Then we'd find opportunities to get in bed together. We slept in a tent, and I had my bunk carefully positioned at the back of the tent, with the flap that faced the woods. She'd sneak out at night, slip up through the back flap, and climb into my bunk."

Jimmy Stryker:"So, other campers were there as well?"

Carly:"Yeah the other girl scouts were sleeping."

Jimmy Stryker:"Wow! Yeah, and we'd fondle and pet and..."

[ Jimmy interrupts....]

Jimmy Stryker:"fascinating....but if I ever get stuck with kids, I'm never sending my daughter to Girl Scout camp! But please go on...my dear."

Carly:"Alright..Yeah my mom said if she knew that's what I was going for she would have never sent me. The follwing year, I had two camp counselors. I did it in a church with one conselor. There was a chapel out in the woods and we did in the church on an over night."

Jimmy Stryker:"Oh, roar...! Carly you bad...bad girl...I don't know if I can trust you with my lovely Lisa!.....Lisa, I think she maybe too wild for you baby."

[ Jimmy yells as Lisa laughs. ]-

Lisa:"Wild is good....more exciting..."

Jimmy Stryker:"If that's what you want...OH, how I love Lesbians@!"

[ As Jimmy was gloating out from stage left walks Lexus Malone. She stands infront of the camera making a cutting motion with her throat. Jimmy's eyes pop clear out of his head as he see's Lexus, and jumps up from his chair. ]

Lexus Malone:"That's enough boys...We here at the AWA do not go for this type of "programing"...it's over.."

[ Jimmy points to the camera crew. ]

Jimmy Stryker:"You shut those cameras off you'll fuckin' die..."

[ He stands infront of Lexus.]

Jimmy Stryker:"How dare you come on the set of my show, and do this to me!"

[ Lexus puts her hands on her hips. ]

Lexus Malone:"How dare you say this show is AWA sponsored. I'm not amused by this Jimmy and neither is Max!"

Jimmy Stryker:"Oh, did you two decide this inbetween you sucking his dick?"

Lexus Malone:"You know Jimmy not every male and female relationship is a sexual one. Not like you seem to think. Max is my business partner, and he has another place to be now. We flipped a coin to see who had to do this...."

[ Jimmy raises his eyebrow and lowers his tone of voice. He puts his arm around Lexus trying to reason with her. ]

Jimmy Stryker:"Lexus, just say you got here too late. Say traffic was heavy, so you got a flat tire and the limo driver didn't have a spare.....Lexus, I'm trying to do a beautiful thing by bring love to two attractive women."

Lexus Malone:"Jimmy, you're trying to hook up two attractive women then put yourself in the middle of it later on tonight, don't try to fool me."

Jimmy Stryker:"But is that so wrong?....I'll tell you what...I'll take out the dyke and put you in her spot instead. After all the jelousy is what this is really about isn't it?"

[ Lexus huffs, and walks over to the extention cord of the camera and pulls the plug. ]

Lexus Malone:"It's over Jimmy, next time do not attach AWA's name to such filth,,,buy some time on capable access."

[ Lexus takes the plug and tosses it to the side, and opens the door to exit. Before she does Jimmy yells to her. ]

Jimmy Stryker:"You talk about filth, but yet you allow Rick Young on TV? What's up with that? Come on Lexus..."

[ Lexus turns around half way in the door. ]

Lexus Malone:"No is No Jimmy...and if you plug that back in you will never get your shot at Cody Carson. I'll make sure you don't."

[ Lexus walks out as Jimmy begins to rant. ]

Jimmy Stryker:"Stupid bitch, denying me heaven. I try to provide good quality programing and I'm denied. Doors are always slammed in my face...gee now I'm starting to know how Mike Young feels.. No wonder that son of a bitch is depressed. First his title loss to Cody Carson, then his mind slipping away, not to mention Rick Young is his brother....God Damn it!"

[ Kasey walks up to Jimmy with Lisa. ]

Kasey:"Jimmy...Lisa was concerned about you, and on her way to see you, she saw Carly. They want to try to make you feel better."

[ Jimmy blows a bubble and looks at Lisa, and now Carly who is by her side.]

Jimmy Stryker:"Really? What did you have in mind?"

[ Lisa leans over and whispers to Jimmy. Jimmy's eyes glaze over and a small tear seems to form in the corner. He smiles and wipes his eye. ]

Jimmy Stryker:"Oh, God Bless you...My birthday has come early!...Let's go girls."

[ Jimmy puts his arms around both girls and begins to walk out. He looks back at Kasey.]

Jimmy Stryker:"Kasey, do not distrub me tonight man, and don't wake me up too early tomorrow...I'm sure..I'll be tired!"

[ Kasey chuckles ]

Kasey:"Will do Jimmy..."

[ Carly opens the door, for Lisa and Jimmy, as they all walk out and the scene fades to black. ]

Slinging the Shit

Paging Michael Manson....Paging Manson...Oh yeah that's right you realized that you were facing Jimmy Stryker this week and decided to tuck your tail between your legs and flee. Smart idea man, your no match for me. Both of us know that one. The surprising thing is you've actually done the right thing by keeping your mouth shut thus far.

I could ramble on and on like some other dudes around here that shall remain name less...***cough*** Cody Carson...****cough****.....instead, I think my time would be best spent, telling joke about your mom. Actually more like things I've heard about her.

My friends always enjoyed your mom, Mikey...They told me that she was so generous, she did so much for free. Until they found out she gave them all a social disease...There must be fifty ways to rank your mom dude... but then I heard shes's frigid tho' she might just be hard to please...but if that's so why does she douche with anti-freeze? She says she likes it' cause it also kills her fleas. Dude, no wonder your so fucked up!

Your mom never gave you a fighting chance. She shamed you, then you shamed yourself further. Now not even I can save you. You were once thought of as one of the greatest around here. Now you're just a shell of someone this place use to count on. Everyone has seen the future....and it's me!..

What I am asking is these jack asses in the front office to stop sticking me in matches against freaks like Adonis, and losers like Arnette...plus no shows like Mike Manson. Give me a damn challenge. Give me something to do that will show case my talent.....Oh wait I get it...

That's it I'm exposing it...You cock blocks...I'm saying it out loud...Conspiracy ! It's a God Damn CONSPIRACY! You've trying to hold me down! You mother fuckers! How dare you....I try to do a proper radio show, and Brandi James bitches. I try to help a lesbian find love and Lexus Malone bitches. I try to make AWA a premeire place and I'm being stopped at every angle. What more does a guy have to do around here?

I'm fed up! Find me some one who will fight back. Some one respectable.....Fuck...I'm not about to upset myself when so much joy await me. Tonight, Men of North American....You'll be living through me.. Now that's enough to make anyone jelous!