--/Intro/--
Soul Survivor played host to an interesting set of events. Simon Sensation, after being humiliated and exiled from the AWA, kisses the right asses then wins the Soul Survivor tournament for a shot at the AWA World championship. Rick Young, with a horseshoe shoved up his ass, walked away with the AWA World championship. And of course, a thong-clad Seth Thomas came up short in his attempt to capture the Youngblood championship from Angela Jameson. Albeit to some it’s not very surprising, considering Seth has never beaten a woman in one-on-one competition. Put any male wrestler in there and he’s fine, but put a woman in there and it’s like kryptonite to him. Even when dressed as a woman he doesn’t fare any better. But through the embarrassment of wrestling in a tiny thong and being beaten by another woman Seth will rise to the occasion and face the current number one contender in Simon Sensation and the current AWA reject in Jimmy Stryker. Let’s see how well they’d perform in ladies underwear.
--/Scene 1/--
Seth walked into the overly large kitchen of their new adobe-style house to find a little box sat on the counter. He picked up the box and searched it over for a card.
“To my loving husband.” Seth read. He lifted the top off and rustled through the tissue paper. Stopping momentarily, he looked both confused and upset at the same time before pulling out a frilly pink thong that resembled the one he had to wear last Monday night. Not really surprised, he snorted and shoved the underwear into his front pocket and tossed the box in the trash.
Nobody had more fun at Seth’s expense than his wife, but it made her giggle, which he loved to do.
Seth turned his attention to the doorway as Cody came stumbling into the kitchen with his eyes closed.
“Seth, is that you?” Cody called out. Not looking amused, Seth answered back.
“Yes, Cody. It is.”
“Are you dressed?”
“Yes, I’m dressed.”
“In drag?”
Cody ducked in time, anticipating the toaster soaring for his head. What he didn’t anticipate was the chair that came next.
“Motherfucker!” Cody said, opening his eyes. He rubbed his head while using the counter to help him to his feet.
“That’ll learn you.” Seth said, happy with the result.
“Yeah, to anticipate a second throw next time.” Cody blurted rather irritated.
“Hey, how about we strap you in a purple g-string and throw you in front of millions of people. See how pleasant you are then.” Seth opened the large fridge door and disappeared inside. He emerged seconds later with two Molsen Canadian beers and hands one to Cody.
“Ah, nothing beats an ice cold Canadian beer.” Cody commented.
“How about a hot Latino wife to go along with it?” Seth smirked while Cody nodded in agreement.
“I can’t argue with that.”
Silence fell in the kitchen as both men silently enjoyed their beers. The time when a man reflects on his life and thinks about what he would rather be doing. For Seth, it was taking Jalie to the pool out back and having a little fun. Not surprisingly, Cody was thinking the same thing.
“So, thinking -- err, speaking of Jalie…” Cody quickly corrected himself. “Any idea of when she’s going to own up for that twenty she owes me?”
“What twenty?” Seth queried with a raised eyebrow.
“The twenty that said you’d end up in your underwear before the night was through.” Cody told him. Seth cocked his head to the side and thought to himself for a moment. When whatever he was thinking about finally made sense, he returned to normal.
“You knew about the outfit?” Seth accused. Cody’s eyes immediately darted away from Seth. “You knew about the outfit and didn’t tell me about it?”
“Hey, you would’ve done the same thing.” Cody blurted. This again put Seth into thought.
“Yeah, I guess you’re right.” Seth shrugged and leaned against the counter.
“So I take it she has no intention of handing over the twenty?” Cody assumed.
“No, she will. But first she’ll ask me for twenty to give to you. So in essence I’ll be paying for the bet she made about me.” Again, Seth shrugged before taking a drink of his beer.
“I’m guessing that she’s not home then?” Cody conversed.
“I guessing not. Although it would be easy to lose her in this place. I wonder what she’s up to?” Seth wondered.
“I doubt it’d be anything good.” Cody added.
Meanwhile…
A young woman with long, dark hair and multiple tattoos was seen crouched behind a sage brush outside a local cantina. Her white tank top was randomly torn, not in the fashionable trendy way, but simply looking as though it had been through hell. She wore a pair of baggy light blue jeans held up at her hips by a few bungee cords and chains. Moving up from her scuffed and battered black combat boots, the cameras revealed none other than Jalie Thomas; Seth’s notoriously eccentric wife. She liked to chew on bits of barb wire, claiming it was far more adventurous than gum. Which, incidentally, was what she was currently doing. Her eyes darted across the street, where Hobo Nick was seen looking ready to spring from the bushes. A car came rumbling around the corner - Nick tensed up - It was a Volkswagen. Jalie held up a hand, signalling for him to wait. Moments later a black BMW convertible rounded the corner. Jalie gave Nick the thumbs up. He darted from the bushes into the crosswalk, almost immediately smacking into the bumper and rolling up and over the hood. As Nick lay motionless in the street, the Armani-clad driver stepped out to check on him. Before Nick had a chance to start complaining of back pain, the driver jumped back in his car and sped away.
Once the coast was clear, Jalie stepped out from the bushes and helped the furious Hobo Nick to his feet.
“That bastard! What the hell is this country coming to?!” Nick raged. Jalie’s serene expression only incited him further.
“Yes, well, when one man can no longer scam a richer man for an insurance settlement… That will be a sad day indeed.” She noted.
“I hate you.” Nick said bluntly. Jalie smiled.
“Me too.”
Hand in hand, the two of them went into the cantina for Jalie’s afternoon buzz.
2 hours later…
Hobo Nick stumbled out of the cantina leaning on Jalie’s arm and sobbing hysterically. Jalie’s eyes were glazed over. It was all she could do to remain standing; one arm supporting Nick and the other fumbling in her jeans pocket for her keys. Nick grabbed her wrist and took on a serious expression.
“Lie- Lie- Lielee, gimme the keys. You’re in no condition to d-d- drive.” Nick hiccupped. He stubbornly stuck out his hand, shortly before passing out.
Jalie grabbed him by the collar of his faded brown trench coat and proceeded to drag him to her El Camino.
Back at the house…
“It’s open!”
Seth voice echoed through the house as he made his way to the front door. By the time he got there, Jenny Tull was standing in the lobby, peering around for any large animals.
“Hi.” Jenny shouted as Seth turned the corner. Seth slowed to a stop and crossed his arms.
“Don’t you remember what happened last time you came around when not wanted?” Seth teased. This made Jenny even more nervous.
“Yeah, well, if I had the choice I wouldn’t be here either. But unfortunately, like I’m sure you know, we have to do what we’re told to do.” Jenny snapped. This caught Seth by surprise, since this is quite out of character for Jenny.
“Well, lets get this over with…” Seth shifted his weight and leaned against the wall while Jenny pulled out her tape recorder.
“Monday at Soul Survivor you came up short in winning the Youngblood title from Angela Jameson. Do you blame it on Lexus and the outfit she gave you.?”
“You’re damn right I do. If it wasn’t for her and that ridiculous outfit, I would’ve wrestled Angela out of her granny-panties and walked away with the belt.”
“There’s a lot of talk in the back about how much you have been around as of late. In fact, there’s a few wrestlers in the back who think you’re lack of dedication to the AWA is a slap in the face to the fed itself and to them as well.”
“Yeah, well, they haven’t said anything to me. So until they do they can continue to prance around me and talk behind my back all they want, because it’s not worth my time or energy.”
“Jimmy Stryker had some strong words for you in his latest shoot. Anything you would like to comment on?”
“Yes, how could such strong words come from a man who has to beg for sex? Honestly? He has the audacity to tell me that I have talent but no heart? I suppose that opposes his heart and lack of talent? I’ve known Jimmy for a long time now. He may think he can pull the wool over everybody else’s eyes but it’s not going to work for me. Do you know why management continues to push me despite my lack of attendance? Because they know I’ll put asses in those seats. I am the most watched superstar the AWA has. Whether or not people think it’s because of this ridiculous gimmick Lexus gave me or not, it doesn’t dispute the fact that people show up to see me. Tell me Jimmy, would people like to see you wrestling in a tiny pink thong? No. Would they like to see me? Yes, even though it will never happen again. You’re nothing but disgruntled lackey trying to be a wrestler.”
“There has also been no recorded words from Simon towards you or Jimmy. Do you think this is merely a ploy?”
“I know exactly what it is. I was here when Simon was before. He likes to do his talking behind the scenes, off camera if you will. He’ll go on to everybody around him about you, but not to your face. I’ve heard a lot from people that used to work with him. Yes, he’s an excellent athlete. He can adapt to any situation, even go out of his element like he did at Soul Survivor and beat you at your own game. I’d be stupid to underestimate his ability in the ring. Just because I don’t like the way he conducts his business out of the ring doesn’t mean he doesn’t pose a threat to me. What do you think it would do for me to get the pin on the current number one contender? I would skyrocket up the rankings and inevitably end up back in the World title hunt. Sure I was going to start from the ground up, but if I can find a shortcut, why not take it?”
“Okay, my final question is--”
Jenny was abruptly knocked to the floor by the front door. Jalie stumbled in and fell into Seth’s chest.
“Hi honey.” She said with a big shit-eating grin.
“Well, I see you’ve been to the cantina. Where’s Nick?”
“He’s still in the… What the hell are you doing here?” Jalie shouted, just taking note of Jenny on the floor.
“I was just leaving.” She stated as she got up off the ground and dusted herself off.
“Bitch…” Jalie said as Jenny closed the door behind her. Jalie closed her eyes and rubbed her head up against Seth.
“I got your little present today. Very funny. Haha.” Seth taunted. Jalie lifted her head up and grinned at Seth.
“Did you happen to check the size?” Jalie asked him. She left the safety of his arms and went stumbling off. Curious, Seth pulled the panties out of his pocket and checked the tag. He raised his eyebrows with intrige and excitement when he realized they were Jalie’s size, not his. He stuffed them back into his pocket and raced off in search of his drunk and vulnerable wife.