..:[Start Roleplay]:.. The scene opens outside the suburban household of Seth and Jalie Thomas. We see Nick walking up the driveway beside the beat up El Camino with a box under his arm. We cut inside to see Seth Thomas walking down the stairs wearing nothing but a towel. Jalie comes walking down the hallway. Jalie Thomas: I’m sorry sir, I’m going to have to confiscate that towel. Just as Jalie reaches for the towel, Nick barges through the door. He sees Seth and cringes. Hobo Nick: For the love of God, put some clothes on! Seth looks a little taken back. Seth Thomas: This coming from the sixty year old man in his tightie whities. Hobo Nick: At least I make it look good. Seth and Jalie roll their eyes. Hobo Nick: Now. Guess what’s in the box. Jalie Thomas: Gary Coleman? Hobo Nick: No. Jalie Thomas: Verne Troyer? Hobo Nick: No... Jalie Thomas: Wee Man?! Hobo Nick: NO! It’s not a damn midget! Jalie hisses at Nick then pulls a tampon out of her pocket and throws it at him, hitting him in the forehead, He grabs it from the floor and hurdles it back at Jalie. She ducks and it catches Jay, who was just walking in behind her, straight in the nose. Jay Dumas: Owww... He rubs his face as the three point and laugh at him. Hobo Nick: Anyways, I was looking in this pet shop up town earlier. One of the employees came up and told me I had to leave. Something about indecent exposure... Seth Thomas: Imagine that... Hobo Nick: I told him I had just as much right to be there as anybody else, and told him I'd make a stink out of the situation. So I let one rip... Nick smiles proudly. Hobo Nick: So the guy said I could pick out any animal I wanted, so long as I promised to leave right away. So I seen this parrot... Nick sets the box on the floor and opens the flaps. The parrot flies out. Jay Dumas: Oh, crap! Jay takes off. The parrot squawks and chases after Jay. Hobo Nick: What the fuck was that all about? Seth and Jalie look at each other and shrug their shoulders, as a large black thing crawls along the wall behind them. The scene fades out.
Last week, things got a little out of hand. I had Royal right where I wanted him, then Legend had to stick his nose in. Instead, this whole ordeal is going to be prolonged... In more ways than one. Not only do we have a match at the Avengement, it’s an Iron Man match. Easily one of the most physically demanding matches in this business. But this isn’t the time to talk about it.
Czecher.
Congratulations, you have the most ridiculous name I’ve ever heard of. Though some may find it clever, I find it stupid. Really stupid. Now, apparently we’re going to be fighting our way to the bottom of a skyscraper. Quite a stupid concept if you ask me. Mainly because if I throw you off, you’ll end up winning. That doesn’t seem very fair.
Who booked this match, anyways?
I have been put in some horrible matches, but this one takes the cake. Never have I heard of two competitors fighting their way down a building. Whoopdee-fucking-doo. How much talent does it take to ride an elevator? This isn’t a wrestling match, it’s a fucking joke. I have never seen eye to eye with upper management, and with the way things are going, I’m never going to. Not if they are going to attempt to screw me over like this. I watched Carson manhandle Czecher last week. There’s no fucking way he would be able to stand against me. So they sat in their tiny little offices with their dicks in their hands thinking, “Hmmm, how can we turn an obviously one sided match into a more even playing field?” Then they came up with a concept where my opponent doesn’t even have to fight me. As long as he can run, he’ll have a chance. It’s preposterous. Never before have I seen such a mockery of our talents.
And you know why?
Because people are idiots. Plain and simple. I’ve felt the same way my entire life, and you’d be amazed what you learn when you work with some of them. I’m just baffled my the simplicity that is the human mind. And Czecher is no exception. He’s part of the general public who should be on display in a cage. The world would be a much safer and more logical place. Honestly, the only thing I know for sure is that I’m going to be victorious. I don’t know what’s going to happen in that sort of environment, but I’m up to any challenge. I’m just going to prove to management that their mindless tactics aren’t going to throw me off...
|