[[ Fade up the SGW logo. ]]

[[ Cornette pops up on the screen, no Tomko, no one else is around him. He's standing in front of the same backdrop as he was in his previous promo. He's wearing different attire than last time. Today it's a red sports coat, a green shirt, blue pants. Cornette has a pissed off look on his face, looking like he could spit nails. ]]

James E. Cornette: So it's come to my attention that with my previous interview, I stepped on some toes and made some babies cry...Well you know what? THAT'S JUST TOO DAMN BAD! BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT A SHOOT IS ALL ABOUT, BABY!

[[ I'm sorry guys, this is fixing to be deja vu. ]]

James E. Cornette: All I ever hear out of those boys in the other company is them bitchin' and complainin' about how Solid Gold takes things too serious! How we live, breathe, and sleep wrestlin'. And as soon as I do somethin' personally, just to raise some eyebrows, not only do they take it to heart, they bring the fight over to our turf and spam boards in the early part of the mornin' like a bunch of PUSSIES! When I talk shit, you know it's me doin' it! I don't fuckin' hide behind a fake name or anythin', I BRING MY COMMENTS THE FUCK TO YOU PERSONALLY! Because I have a set of balls..

[[ Pause. ]]

James E. Cornette: AND YOU CAN ALL SUCK ON 'EM, YOU FUCKS!

[[ Cornette paces from side to side, fuming. ]]

James E. Cornette: Now I bet you guys think you're all a bunch of hot shots after spammin' the boards and postin' shit on your site about me. I gotta' thank you for that one. Because you see, I didn't go into that promo a few days ago with the intention of startin' a war...I went in with the intentions of TELLIN' THE TRUTH! And I did! Curt Hennig's dead! How can I be called an idiot for that? How can he wrestle, no only wrestle, but win matches?! Is APDubya runnin' some of that "Weekend at Bernie's" bullshit? Fuck that! Fuck you for startin' shit with a bull you don't wanna' fuck with! I went easy last time, just thought I'd step on a few toes, get some competitive juices flowin', but now you pieces of shit done gone and made it personal!

[[ The camera zooms in closer on Cornette. ]]

James E. Cornette: So here I am. Unlike the boys who attacked SGDubya, I'm here showin' my face. I'm standin' strong. I admit, I talked shit. I ran my mouth, and you know what? Here I am doin' it again! So go ahead, get pissed at me. Call me a piece of shit, a loser, a man with no life...Because the fact is, I probably have more of a life than all of you combined!...I ain't got no pimples...But the jackass part is right!

[[ Cornette storms around some more before finally stopping to nail some more comments. ]]

James E. Cornette: You can say I'm takin' this overboard, or I'm out to prove a point...But I'm just standin' here, lettin' everyone know what's what! This ain't about SGDubya Shock anymore, Kevin Nash has already laid his bed and Christian's gonna' put 'em in it! This ain't about Val Venis bein' a joke of a World Champion! This ain't about Muhammad Hassan doin' drugs and bein' a loser! This is about the pricks in the other company who likes to get their laughs and kicks at Solid Gold's expense. SGDubya ain't a dead company, I didn't even consider that. I didn't do it to try to liven things up..I did it to let people know what I thought! I did it to get a response! MISSION GOD DAMN ACCOMPLISHED IF YOU ASK ME!

[[ Cornette remains still for once, he strokes his chin and continues. ]]

James E. Cornette: And to the APDubya roster who I shot on last time and made comments about me...Thanks. But in all honesty, I don't know what the hell's goin' on in that place! The only time I look at shit is when I'm about to FLUSH IT DOWN MY COMMODE! I only went by what your fellow APDubya members have been tellin' me about how the place was full of favortism...How the fed was a joke. Don't shoot the messenger, you'd just need to watch out for the two-faced people you got in your company!

[[ Pause then back to work. ]]

James E. Cornette: I just think it's funny at the response I got from the promo. Hell, if I knew the world was gonna' revolve around me for a week, I'd said what I said a whole hell of a lot sooner! I'm the man known for his mouth. I'm the Louisville Lip! I'm never at a loss for words, and I'm still yapping on now!...I don't flat out hate everyone in APDubya, I respect some of 'em...But I lost a whole hell of a lot of respect for that place after the shit they're doing...Spammin' must be their favorite thing to do. When PDubyaR was around, they spammed the boards! When LoC was around, they spammed the boards! And now, now Solid Gold's gettin' a taste!...Like I said earlier, when I speak my mind, you can see me do it! I ain't hidin'! I don't backtrack on my words, I don't stutter, I lay everything out there, and if you don't like it...Too bad! But to say me personally, or anyone else in this company takes things too seriously is a JOKE! We don't spend our times trying to spam companies and shit...We're busy with our real lives! We're asleep at five damn thirty in the mornin'! So get a fuckin' life! Stop being faggots! Stop lookin' for gay porn as you read my promo!

[[ Cornette pauses and silence is heard, and never sounded sweeter. He cracks a smile across his face and holds up one finger. ]]

James E. Cornette: Now look, I heard your slave driver say to ignore me, ignore us...And the thing is, I know you won't! You can't do it! The only reason he says to not start a war, because it's somethin' Solid Gold Wrestlin' will end up fuckin' finishin' in the end! I ain't here to start a war, but I'm here to defend myself and the company I am employed by! I'm a man who stands up for what he believes in, a man who lets you know what I think. I'm not ashamed of it. I don't try to hide it. I let you know! But you boys bringin'shit on our land ain't gonna' cut it...Because you boys keep the shit up...SGDubya will come over there and make All-Pro Wrestlin' look like fuckin' Japan in World War II thanks to the atomic bombs we'll drop! It'll be damn Nagasaki and Hiroshima all the hell over again!

[[ Cornette still stares as he takes a breath. He's ranting and raving so loud his voice is cracking a little. ]]

James E. Cornette: My entire career I've been told I talk a lot of garbage. I've been told to calm down and not try to cause so much controversy...But guess what? I can't stop! I've got a problem! I'm like an addict! I have an addiction...And my fix is pissin' people off! I love pissin' people off to the point to where they're only response to me is "GET A LIFE!" or "GEEK!" Geek? GEEK? I'm no geek!! In high school, I was the one stealin' your lunch money and takin' the girls you fantasized about on dates!...In college, I was the one who invited you to the frat parties, got you drunk, tied you up and stuck you in a mail box at the post office!! James E. Cornette is the equvilent of the greatest man ever born in the history of the Earth! I'm not a geek...I'm not a pimply jackass...I'm not even a jackass...I'm a PRICK! I'M A HARD ASS SON OF A BITCH! You don't like me, FUCK OFF! GO BITCH ABOUT ME SOME MORE ON YOUR BOARDS! START THREADS ABOUT HOW I HAVE NO LIFE! WAIT FOR YOUR DUMBASS BUDDIES TO SIGN ONLINE AFTER THEY GET OUT OF SEVENTH GRADE AND REPLY WITH SHIT LIKE "LOL!" AND "OH MY GOD, OWNED!"

[[ Cornette throws his hands in the air. ]]

James E. Cornette: Owned has a wide variety of meanings..For example, owned is Val Venis in a title match, because God knows he's not retainin'! Owned is anyone facin' Christian or Edge, because favortism is runnin' wild in Solid Gold! That's why he's still the World Champion! That's why he always beats the no-shows! FUCKIN' FAVORTISM! Owned....Owned is Mike Adkins when he pulls down his pants in front of a girl! APDubya will NEVER EVER "own" Solid Gold! APDubya is only good for one thing...That's runnin' a few weeks and fuckin' DYING LIKE CURT HENNIG!....That made me laugh...Seein' people thank me for mentionin' them in my promo..You're mighty welcome. Because for once, you were apart of somethin' that EVERYBODY READ AND ENJOYED! EVERY DAMN PERSON READ MY PROMO AND HAD A RESPONSE!....Which hell, the way it sounds, that's the total opposite of any shit you boys ever do, that draw no response whatsoever.

[[ Cornette flashes his tennis racket. ]]

James E. Cornette: Like I said, I respect SOME of the people in that company, but not the ones who took what I said to heart and lost their testicles and turned into little girls...For the ones that did that, I have the right mind to take this tennis racket and cram it up someone's ass as soon as you get Mason's dick outta' there while he was screwin' you over for some untalentless hack! Go ahead, I fully expect to have more attention drawn to me and my awesome comments as soon as you idiots get done readin' this...Which makes me laugh. Solid Gold is full of losers, right? Then why in God's name would you spend your time readin' somethin' from a loser? You bunch of idiots! You stupid fucks! You pieces of shit! My first promo was nothing compared to how I truly think and feel! I was goin' easy! Just imagine if I let everybody have it! Why hell, this business would be set on fire! Fireworks were struck last night like it was damn July 4th...To you ignorant shits in the United Kingdom, that'd be the day the United States said "Fuck right off!"....And today, March 28, 2006...Is the day James E. Cornette stands in front of you saying "Go fuck yourselves...You stupid TWATS!!"....Now I'm from Kentucky, but I even know what a twat is...A twat is somethin' I've actually seen before, not somethin' I use in diologue to make myself cool! So boys, go see a twat and then you can talk about it!

[[ Cornette pulls out a handkerchief and wipes down his face. He's ranting so hard he's sweating like he's ran a mile. ]]

James E. Cornette: It's an amazin' feelin' knowin' that I just speak my mind and immediately get responses out of people. I haven't made the people riot in years, and I gotta' admit, it feels damn good! But what you people don't know is, when I rant and you go try to attack back...That's makin' me the winner. That means that everything I said struck a chord in ya'. It means I got under your skin...It means I WAS RIGHT AND YOU FUCKIN' KNOW IT! So the more you keep trying to battle back, mock me and harass me...The better it makes me feel about myself. So go ahead. Keep trying to even the score, because anything you people can do....James E. Cornette, the manager of champions, the Louisville Lip...The greatest manager in the history of proferssional wrestling...CAN DO BETTER!

[[ The camera zooms out, getting a wider shot. ]]

James E. Cornette: How does it make you feel knowin' I got under your skin? It makes me feel like I accomplished somethin'. You can act like it don't bother you, like it's no big deal...But it is. I know it is! If it wasn't, you'd not manned a special mission to spam boards in the mornin'! If it wasn't you'd not dedicated threads on your board to me! If it wasn't a big deal...You'd not have blew it out of proportion, and I'd not of have to had done this again! It don't bother me...I was just gonna' rant on Venis in this one, call him a jobber shit...But I think this is more suitable!

[[ Cornette holds the racket up in view again, he looks down at it and then back at the camera. ]]

James E. Cornette: I just want to apologize for shootin'. Had I known speakin' my mind was gonna' hurt people's feelings...I'd not said some of the things I said.

[[ Cornette looks kind of remorseful. He springs his head back up at the camera. ]]

James E. Cornette: THE HELL I WOULD! I'D NOT SAID THE THINGS I SAID LAST TIME, I'D SAID THE SHIT I'VE SAID TODAY! I'D DONE IT RIGHT THE FIRST TIME HAD I KNOWN EVERYONE WAS GONNA' TURN INTO A BUNCH OF CIRCLE JERKERS WITHOUT NUTS!.....Because it's makin' me sad...It's makin' me real damn sad over here...Sad because you idiots don't realize that this is how I am. This is James E. Cornette rantin' and ravin' on a rival company! I did it while in Stamford on Atlanta! I did it in RoH and ranted on Ohio Valley! This is James E. Cornette talkin' shit on a rival company and the company's asshole members! This ain't no hidden message shit, you want that, go listen to an AC/DC album backwards!...But hell, the hidden messages on those things go like this.."THIS IS SATAN AND YOU'RE A STUPID FUCK FOR LISTENIN' TO IT BACKWARDS! NOW LISTEN TO 'BACK IN BLACK' AND STOP BEING A BITCH!"

[[ Cornette looks sternly into the camera. ]]

James E. Cornette: APDubya just doesn't understand how the wrestlin' game works. Sometimes you say stuff to get a response, but believe me...You boys don't want a war. Best thing your owner ever did was tell you not to mess with us! Because anything after this just continues to let me and everyone in Solid Gold know that we can get under your skin...We can bother you to the point of attack! Keep bringin' us up, but next time you wanna' link around my promo, link around the fed that it was brought up on! I wouldn't want to force all you bitches to use up my bandwith by readin' my masterpieces! Spare the love to Solid Gold if you're gonna' make a big deal out of one of its promos! So more or less, the only thing I have left to say is really...Seriously guys, just stop bein' babies! If I want to run my mouth on certain things, let me! It ain't shit to you! You don't want me bringin' the boom to you guys personally like you tried doin' to us! Because Solid Gold Wrestlin' and Jim Cornette have a habit of pickin' up the remains of companies when it's all said and fuckin' done...LoC and PDubyaR killed you guys before, don't make Solid Gold the next.

[[ Pause. ]]

James E. Cornette: So with that in mind, remember this...Mind your own business and we'll mind ours. I don't apologize for pissin' you off because it's good to see the truth every now and then. Facts are facts, and it's somethin' you can't overlook. Hennig's dead no matter what you say! Just don't let what I say bother you to the point of makin' your heads explode like last time...Because that let's me know I'm doing a damn good job of talkin'...And also lets me know you can't take a few shots without cryin' to momma!....So yeah, the follow has been the views or me, James E. Cornette, personally...Nothing more, nothing less. The follow views should be shared by everyone because like always, I'M RIGHT AND I KNOW IT!

[[ He cracks a smile. ]]

James E. Cornette: And if you don't like what I have to say...Well then do three things, suck my dick, kiss Christian's ass, and go fuck yourself for bein' a stupid asshole!...Go ahead, call me pathetic and a loser...But the real loser in all of this is you, you for actually sittin' through all of this, takin' the abuse I spit out, and typing in the address to APDubya's site right now to bitch about it.

[[ The smile remains. ]]

James E. Cornette: Thanks, have a good one.

[[ The scene fades. ]]

[[ Static. ]]

[[ Fade out. ]]