Welcomed to Main Event:

- Triple H
- Stevie Richards
- Blue Meanie
- Vampiro
- Val Venis(2)
- Amy Love
- Rob Van Dam
- Chris Benoit(2)
- Dean Malenko
- Kevin Nash(2)
- Steve Austin
- Shawn Michaels(2)
- Ken Kennedy/ Big Show
- Chavo Guerrero Jr?
- Maria?

' Thank You Chavo '

[[ Static. ]]

[[ Fade up the SGW logo. ]]

[[ The scene opens up inside of a jail cell. It's a familiar cell, as it's the one Jim Cornette's been locked up in all week without yet getting out. It's also the same cell Val Venis, Steve Austin, and Mike Awesome were locked up in last night on Shock. The camera walks down the long hall of cells and you see Val Venis and Mike Awesome sitting in the cells, Steve Austin evidently is either gone or is out doing something with the guards. The camera continues scanning around, stopping at the cell of Cornette's. He's alone, no sign of his previous cell mate in view. He's sitting in his usual jail attire on his bunk. He's singing again. ]]

James E. Cornette: We're halfway there..Ahhhhahhhh livin' on a prayer!

[[ Another monster ballad. ]]

James E. Cornette: Take my hand..We'll make it I swear...Ahhhhahhh livin' on a prayer!

[[ Horrible singing. Horrible. ]]

James E. Cornette: God damn I'm so bored. What else can I sing?

" How about you shut the hell up over there? "

[[ Cornette pops up off his bunk and looks outside his bars. ]]

James E. Cornette: The hell said that?

Val Venis: The SGW World Heavyweight Champion.

[[ Cornette looks confused. ]]

James E. Cornette: Christian? 'Bout damn time you decided to come get me!

Val Venis: The REAL SGW World Heavyweight Champion.

[[ Cornette raises an eyebrow. ]]

James E. Cornette: Randy Orton?! What are you doin' over there?

[[ You can hear the anger in Venis' voice. ]]

Val Venis: It's Val Venis you idiot.

James E. Cornette: You're 'bout to get out aren't you?

Val Venis: Yeah, Bisch is finishing the paper work. I have a title to defend.

[[ A smile comes across Cornette's face. ]]

James E. Cornette: A title to defend? Fuck Venis, everybody knows you ain't defendin' SHIT! You defendin' and retainin' your World titles is a damn oxymoron! You're such a piece of shit, Venis!

Mike Awesome: YEAH! A PIECE OF FUCKIN' SHIT! LIKE WHAT'S UP AN ASSHOLE! RIGHT HERE! RIGHT THE FUCK HERE!

Val Venis: Easy Mike.

Mike Awesome: RIGHT HERE!

[[ Val's tone changes back to intense as he confronts Cornette. ]]

Val Venis: Easy to talk big when you're in a cell, huh Cornette?

James E. Cornette: If I wasn't in here, I'd walk up to your face, spit it in and then cuss you out for bein' a fuck!

Guard: Then you're in luck.

[[ The door of Cornette's cell is opened. Cornette looks like he's about to explode. ]]

James E. Cornette: What are you doin'?

Guard: Your friends bailed you out. You're free to go.

James E. Cornette: Fuck.

[[ The guard grabs Cornette and walks him out. Venis reaches his hand out and stops Cornette. ]]

Val Venis: Got anything to say now, hot shot?

James E. Cornette: FUCK YOU, YOU...YOU..TALENTLESS FUCK!

[[ Cornette looks proud at his comments, and secure knowing Venis is behind bars. Val grabs Cornette through the cell and pulls Cornette to him, his head smacking the bars. ]]

James E. Cornette: OUCH! DAMMIT!

Val Venis: Idiot.

[[ The guard smirks and escourts Cornette to the exit. The scene fades. ]]

[[ The scene cuts as we now open inside of a large banquet hall. Large chandeliers hang from the ceiling all around the room. Large windows vacate the areas on the walls, and in between the windows is elegant white tile on the walls. The floors are three colors of gray granite floring. Large tables with table cloths fill up the space on the main section of the room. There's about ten tables, neatly aligned across the floor. The sun is still out as you can see the rays shining into the room, giving it some light. ]]

[[ The first person enters the room. Shane Douglas, the "Franchise" and number one interviewer of Solid Gold enters wearing an SGW polo t-shirt. He's looking around, wide-eyes, stroking his goatee. ]]

Shane Douglas: HA! HA! HA! IT IS I, THE FUCKIN' FRANCHISE! WHO'S THE FIRST ONE HERE FOR THE SGW LEGENDS DINNER? ME! SHANE FUCKIN' DOUGLAS! HA! HA! HA!

[[ Douglas strokes his goatee and yields an estatic face that simply cannot be described. ]]

Shane Douglas: ALL THOSE FUCKIN' CUNTS ARE LATE, BUT THE FUCKIN' FRANCHISE IS ALWAYS ON TIME TO GET THE SCOOP!

[[ Douglas wanders around as everyone is still setting things up for the event. He acts like he's been told some sudden news as he presses his finger against his right ear.. ]]

Shane Douglas: I'VE GOT A FUCKIN' NEWS FLASH FOR EVERYBODY! CHAVO GUERRERO, JR. MOTHER FUCKIN' SUCKS COCK! HA! HA! HA! ZING!

[[ Douglas laughs that exaggerated laugh. ]]

Shane Douglas: THAT'S WHY HE'S NOT INVITED TO THE FUCKIN' SGW LEGENDS DINNER! MORE MOTHER FUCKIN' SHRIMP FOR THE FUCKIN' FRANCHISE! HA! HA! HA!

[[ He strokes his goatee as the scene fades. ]]

[[ In Val Venis' stolen limousine now. Current time. ]]

[[ The limo is more packed than it usually is thanks to the additions of Edge and Stacy. Tomko, Christian, and Trish occupy one side, Edge and Stacy vacate the opposite side. The duo's collection of title belts vacate the other seat beside them. The group seems to be enjoying their ride. Edge and Christian seem so carefree as they cuddle with their respected diva. Tomko sits with his arms crossed, looking like he hates his life as always. ]]

Christian: Six more days.

[[ A smile of satisfaction spreads across his face. ]]

Christian: Six more days until Maria is gone from Solid Gold FOREVER!

Edge: Yep. World Warrior is going to be the single most important day in the history of SGW. For years they've said you and I were cancers to the wrestling business..But after Sunday, Christian...We're going to be SAVIORS!

[[ Christian nods. Edge flashes a big, cocky smirk. ]]

Christian: With Maria gone, maybe justice can be restored in this company. Maybe people will finally stop dying on a weekly basis, celebrities can stop winning titles, and I can get my damn World title back.

Edge: Being a triple champion would be fantastic. Getting rid of Maria is us doing a service to not only SGW, but the well being of the wrestlers. People should be thanking us personally, not rooting for us to lose.

Tyson Tomko: ..Crazy.

Christian: It is, Tomko! It's pure craziness! I guess if everyone enjoys betting on who the next person to die in the back is going to be, having people with losing records as World Champion, and an owner who snorts lines of ash..We may as well lay down and do the job.

[[ This is quickly rejected. ]]

Edge and Christian Together: Nah.

Trish Stratus: Maria lived up to my expectations as manager. She's even surpassed them! That's only because SGW is still open. When I saw she was named the interim owner, I was already filling out an APW application.

[[ Blank stares. Trish defends her comments. ]]

Trish Stratus: Joke. Jesus.

Edge: You were about to get punched.

Christian: That is no lie.

Trish Stratus: It's going to be a day of celebration on Sunday. Finally, we'll be free of the reign of terror Maria's brought upon SGW. Wrestlers can no longer fear death, you two will be put back into the main event where you belong, and people can no longer get away with murder like Randy Orton while Val Venis gets arrested for illegal substances.

Edge: Yeah, what about that? There's video PROOF Orton killed Taz. Hell, he even admitted to it countless times, and yet no one's arresting him.

[[ Christian looks puzzled to why anyone's complaining. ]]

Christian: Who cares? I know I don't. Val Venis is locked up where he belongs! Val Venis isn't in jail for illegal substance, he's in jail for MURDER!

Tyson Tomko: ..Hmm?

Christian: He may of not killed Taz, but he damn sure did kill ALL credibility that I put into the SGW World Heavyweight title in less than a month! How can you be the World Champion and suck that bad?

Edge: I'd ask Chavo Guerrero, Jr..But when he won the World title those two times, I sneezed and when I looked back up, he wasn't the champ anymore.

[[ This draws smiles from all the occupants inside. ]]

Christian: How could we forget that when we get rid of Maria, we'll be sending Chavo Guerrerro back to his home on Jobber Island? This is the best two-for-one deal of all time. Good job on the stipulation work, Edge.

Edge: I do what I do.

[[ Edge shrugs. ]]

Edge: I don't want to toot my own horn..But "TOOT, TOOT!" I just let Jillian have her way. She got her fix. She got to get R-Rated for one night only. It was worth it.

Trish Stratus: Edge, you practically raped her.

[[ Edge shows no sign of compassion. ]]

Edge: And the point of that was....?

Trish Stratus: Nevermind.

Edge: Hey, Stacy was getting the best of me, and still is...It's alright to share.

Stacy Keibler: Sure is.

[[ They kiss. ]]

Edge: And it's not like she didn't want it. She was playing hard to get, that's all.

Trish Stratus: No she wasn't.

[[ Edge rolls his eyes. ]]

Edge: Oh well. It's helping us get rid of two pieces of dead weight, isn't it?

Christian: Yeah Trish, sometimes you got to let a chick know how it's going down. You got to be firm to get your way. Thanks to Edge, after Sunday, we're getting rid of Maria AND Chavo!..I honestly didn't know Chavo was in SGW again until the other day, but still..It can't be a bad thing getting rid of Chavo.

Edge: Yeah Trish. I could've went to jail if she cried "rape," so I'd suggest you thank me for taking a bullet for the team..For the cause!

Christian: He did it for SGW!

Stacy Keibler: Yeah Trish, rape isn't anything to joke with.

[[ Trish shakes her head, not believing the backing of Edge's rape. ]]

Trish Stratus: You guys kill me.

Christian: And on Sunday night, Edge and I will do another heroic act for SGW. We'll save it from Maria, and clear up an extra roster spot for someone. I've waited my entire career to face the almighty Chavo Guerrero..Who'd ever thought it'd be in his last match ever?

Edge: Who ever thought we'd be drug back far down the card to actually HAVE to face Chavo?

Christian: Another reason why Maria gone is going to boost us back to the main event where we belong! I was the highest drawing World Champion in years! Val Venis has drawn nothing with his title reign but flies! Because Val Venis' title reign has been CRAP!

[[ Edge continues the arrogant onslaught. ]]

Edge: Yeah, the last time Chavo's seen the main event, we were being jobbed to Demolition because we had the glass ceiling over our heads.

Tyson Tomko: ..Old school.

Christian: And now the tables have turned in our favor...We ARE the glass ceiling. Chavo wants to break through it again, to go out with a bang...He's going to go out with a bang alright. When his damn skull BANGS the glass ceiling, and then we kick him in his ass right out of Solid Gold Wrestling FOREVER!

[[ Confidence fills the vehicle. ]]

Christian: It's going to be great.

[[ The limo comes to a hault. Edge knows what this means. ]]

Edge: Guess we're here to get Cornette.

[[ You can hear the sarcasm in Trish's voice. ]]

Trish Stratus: Awesome.

Stacy Keibler: I've missed Jim. It's been quiet without him.

Tyson Tomko: ..Yep.

Edge: But without Corny, the shooting content of this promo has gone down thirty percent.

Christian: I need more shooting.

[[ Edge nods. ]]

Edge: Ditto.

Trish Stratus: I hope he comes out and has tons of stories to tell about being beaten up and molested.

Christian: Have we entered a new era Muhammad Hassan promo, an old school Ken Kennedy interview or something? We don't roll with molestation. Rape isn't funny, Trish. It effects people daily, it's not a stand-up comedy routine. It's not a "yo momma" joke. It's serious business.

Edge: Very serious.

[[ Trish shakes her head at the ridiculousness that is Edge and Christian. ]]

Trish Stratus: Amazing..Simply amazing.

[[ The scene fades as Trish is totally baffled. ]]

[[ The scene quickly fades back to the dining hall where we last left off with Shane Douglas just arriving. Time has passed, and he is no longer the only one there. We see Shane Douglas sitting in a chair at one of the large tables with fellow SGW legends Al Snow and Chris Kanyon. They seem relaxed, just catching up on old times. ]]

Shane Douglas: And now I'm the fuckin' interviewer for Shock every week!

Chris Kanyon: You're lucky, man. I can't get a job in SGDubya'.

Shane Douglas: It's because you're a GOD DAMN FAGGOT! A COCK SUCKER LIKE CHAVO GUERRERO! SGW DOESN'T HIRE QUEERS, YOU FAGGOT!

[[ Kanyon is stunned at Douglas' rant. ]]

Shane Douglas: The "G" in SGW doesn't stand for "GAY" YOU IDIOT!

Chris Kanyon: ....

Shane Douglas: And besides..

[[ Douglas calms down considerably. ]]

Shane Douglas: YOU WHINE LIKE A FUCKIN' BITCH! YOU LOST MORE WORLD TITLE MATCHES THAN VAL VENIS AND CHAVO GUERRERO COMBINED! YOU'RE WORSE THAN MATT GOD DAMN EMERSON, YOU FAGGOT ASSHOLE!

Chris Kanyon: Seriously Shane, I get your point. I'm gay, I know.

Shane Douglas: Then why are you here for, Chris Kanyon? Give me the fuckin' scoop!

[[ Kanyon reluctantly answers, knowing assault is coming his way. ]]

Chris Kanyon: I'm here for the SGDubya' legends dinner. Ya' know, the same reason you're here.

Shane Douglas: HA! HA! HA! SPOILER ALERT, BITCH! THIS ISN'T AN SGW LEGENDS DINNER! THIS IS A BIG PLOT FROM EDGE AND CHRISTIAN TO FUCKIN' HUMILIATE CHAVO GUERRERO! CHAVO THE COCK SUCKIN' GUERRERO!

[[ Douglas continues. ]]

Shane Douglas: BECAUSE HE'S A PIECE OF SHIT THAT CHAVO! THIS AIN'T A LEGENDS DINNER! YOU'RE NOT HERE TO BE HONORED! YOU'RE HERE TO BASH CHAVO AND TRY TO FIND SOMEONE TO FUCKIN' FUCK TONIGHT, ISN'T THAT TRUE, KANYON?!

Chris Kanyon: Well..

[[ Kanyon is cut off. ]]

Shane Douglas: WELL? WELL? WELL TOO DAMN BAD, CHRIS KANYON?! YOU AIN'T FUCKIN' NOBODY TONIGHT! NO FUDGE PACKIN' GOING ON AT THE SGW LEGENDS DINNER!

Chris Kanyon: Alright...

[[ Kanyon is cut off AGAIN. ]]

Shane Douglas: SO IF YOU'RE NOT HERE TO BASH CHAVO FOR BEING DUMB ENOUGH TO BACK THAT DUMB GOOF MARIA AND END UP LOSING HIS FUCKIN' JOB THANKS TO EDGE AND CHRISTIAN...WHO KICKED YOUR FUCKIN' ASS AND ALWAYS TURNED ON YOU AFTER YOU BEGGED 'EM TO JOIN YOUR STABLE...YOU NEED TO GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE! THERE'S A GAY BAR DOWN THE STREET! GO PACK SOME FUDGE, KANYON!

[[ Kanyon shakes his head, stands up and walks away. Douglas shrugs to Al Snow, who has remained silent during this entire onslaught. ]]

Shane Douglas: Chris Kanyon, OWNED AGAIN AT THE HANDS OF THE FUCKIN' FRANCHISE! HA! HA! HA!

[[ Fade. ]]

[[ Outside the jail we see two guards escourting Cornette out. He's wearing the same swimsuit with the red and white stripes on it from last week. He sees the limousine and the Coalition members standing outside, leaned against it and cracks a big smile. ]]

James E. Cornette: About goddamn time!

Edge: We had to set some things up for tonight.

Christian: That and they didn't want to bail you out.

James E. Cornette: We got Maria to get rid of! Let's get outta' here!

[[ He rips his arms free from the grip of the guards and turns to them. ]]

James E. Cornette: So, I'm free to go right?

Guard: Yep.

James E. Cornette: Good.

[[ Cornette looks satisfied. He takes a deep breath and speaks. ]]

James E. Cornette: You two and this whole fuckin' jail can go TO HELL! I'VE HAD THE WORST FUCKIN' WEEK OF MY LIFE! I'VE SANG DAMN 80s MONSTER BALLADS, ALMOST GOT RAPED BY SOME BIG ORG NAMED SEBASTIAN! YOU GUYS ARE SONS OF BITCHES!

Tyson Tomko: ..Idiot.

[[ He continues as the Coalition comes closer. ]]

James E. Cornette: And quite frankly, you two can just go...

[[ Edge puts his hand over Cornette's mouth as he and Christian drag Cornette away and sling him ino the limo. ]]

Trish Stratus: Have a nice day...You two can just go have a nice day.

[[ Trish smiles. ]]

Trish Stratus: Yep.

Christian: We're gonna' get him out of here.

Guard: Good idea.

[[ Everyone gets inside the limo and it drives away. We're left with one last view of the two guards. ]]

Guard: Hate seein' 'em go.

Guard Two: Yep. He was a hell of a singer.

Guard: Indeed he was.

[[ The scene fades as they watch the limousine drive away. ]]

[[ We're now inside the limousine as it's driving away from prison. Cornette is sitting in the seat where the title belts were laying. The belts are now resting beside their respected owners. Cornette looks so proud to be out of jail. ]]

James E. Cornette: I'm so glad to be out of that god damn cell.

Christian: You've been missed.

Trish Stratus: This is all news to me.

James E. Cornette: I don't think I could have lasted another day. Mike Awesome and Val Venis were in the cell right beside me...But you don't worry, I insulted Val Venis for bein' a damn idiot the entire time!

Edge: You missed a hell of a Shock.

Stacy Keibler: Edge raped Jillian.

[[ Cornette's eyes go wide. ]]

James E. Cornette: Have I ever told you that you're my hero, Edge?

[[ Edge smiles and shrugs. ]]

Edge: I do my best.

Christian: No matter what you want to call it, Edge ended up getting our stipulations of the match altered a little bit.

James E. Cornette: Maria's still leavin' right? Don't fuckin' tell me it was a swerve!

Edge: Swerve? Whatever Cornette. Swerves are outdated now.

Christian: Yeah, they're so predictable now.

James E. Cornette: Good. I want her ass out of SGDubya'!

Christian: Well, when we give her the boot on Sunday, she'll have some company.

[[ Edge flexes, smirking a huge smile. ]]

Edge: Thanks to me.

Christian: Yep, thanks to Edge, new stipulation Cornette...We win, which we'll obviously do, because well, it's us..Maria is no longer the interim owner of SGW, and Chavo Guerrero, Jr. no longer has a roster spot in Solid Gold EVER AGAIN!

James E. Cornette: BRILLIANT! 'Atta boy, Edge! That's the way to rough them bitches up to get your way! Thank God! World Warrior isn't goin' down the shitter anymore!

Edge: Val Venis is still in the main event.

[[ The wind is sucked out of Cornette's rally. ]]

James E. Cornette: For right now, fuck Venis! You two are gettin' rid of Maria AND Chavo!

Christian: And keeping our Tag titles.

[[ Edge nods, slapping his belt as Christian slaps his. ]]

Edge: World Warrior is going to be dominated by the greatest tag team in Solid Gold. Chavo Guerrero Jr., in my eyes, is rated "B" for BITCH! Because that's what he's going to be Sunday night! He's going to be Edge and Christian's personal BITCH!

Christian: And Maria..She's going to get a little bit of Vitamin C in her.

Trish Stratus: No...No she's not.

[[ Christian looks down at Trish. ]]

Christian: I was kidding! Maria's going to get a little bit of a beatdown! Better?

Trish Stratus: Much.

Edge: Maria and Chavo combine, that draws the rating of "S."

[[ Edge smiles and rubs his chin. ]]

Edge: It's real simple to figure out what the S stands for.

Christian: Yeah..They're rated "S" for "STUPID!"

[[ Christian flashes a smile of confidence. ]]

Edge: More like "S" for "SCREWED!"

Christian: Oh yeah.

[[ Cornette kicks back in the seat, still in his swimsuit, looking like an idiot. ]]

James E. Cornette: So, what's the big plan for this pay-per-view? Celebrities? Documentaries? What?

Stacy Keibler: We blew the rest of Val's paycheck at spring break.

James E. Cornette: Dammit, that's why I rotted in jail for three days?

[[ Nods all around. ]]

Tyson Tomko: ..Yep.

[[ Cornette quickly forgets being in jail as he changes te subject. ]]

James E. Cornette: So, Jillian's tits...You motorboat 'em? Huh? You fuckin' sailor!

Stacy Keibler: Excuse me?

James E. Cornette: Shut it, Stace! The man's a sailor, I can tell!

Edge: I didn't motorboat it, no.

James E. Cornette: Shit. Wish you had.

[[ Trish smiles. ]]

Trish Stratus: I can tell.

James E. Cornette: Huh?

[[ Trish points and Cornette follows the index finger. Looking down, he realizes he's sprang a hard-on. Cornette blushes as snickers raise from the mouths of everyone. Cornette grabs Christian's Gimmick title and puts it over himself. ]]

James E. Cornette: Dammit!

[[ Christian grabs the title belt back. ]]

Christian: It may be a crappy belt, but dammit, it's all I got!

[[ Christian clutches the title, then realizes where it's been as the scene fades. ]]

[[ Opening back up at the SGW Legends Dinner, Shane Douglas is standing at a podium on the stage looking down at all the SGW legends in attendance. You see Bret Hart, Jushin Liger, Ted DiBiase and the entire crew of Money Incorporated fully healed after the assault on them from Muhammad Hassan a month ago, Gangrel, the Sandman, the Undertaker..Just every former SGW legend you can think of. Kanyon is sitting alone, sulking. Behind Douglas is a large backdrop that reads "THANK YOU CHAVO!" with his picture under it. Douglas is in midspeech as we catch up. ]]

Shane Douglas: AND SO KANYON SAID "I'M HERE FOR THE GANGBANG!" AND I FUCKIN' LAUGHED IN HIS FACE, AND I TOLD HIM...SWEAR TO THE LORD AND THE FAT MAN HIMSELF, DUSTY RHODES.."KANYON, GO PACK FUDGE YOU FUDGE PACKIN' SHIT!" HA! HA! HA!

[[ This draws laughs from the legends, Kanyon just shakes his head with his arms crossed. ]]

Shane Douglas: FUDGE PACKER, BECAUSE HE'S GAY!

Chris Kanyon: ..Bastard.

[[ Douglas stops laughing long enough to finish his spill, but he's still fronting a smile on his face from ear to ear. ]]

Shane Douglas: But back to the point, I, the fuckin' Franchise, is the emcee tonight of the special Legends Dinner hosted by true SGW legends, EDGE AND CHRISTIAN!

[[ Applause for Edge and Christian. ]]

Shane Douglas: But tonight, we're honoring a legend who's quitting after this pay-per-view..Not on his own terms, but thanks to Edge and Christian fuckin' KICKIN HIM IN THE ASS OUT THE GOD DAMN DOOR! HA! HA! HA! WE'RE HONORING CHAVO GUERRERO, JR. TONIGHT BECAUSE AFTER SUNDAY, HE'LL BE FUCKIN' RETIRED!

[[ Douglas is the only one laughing. ]]

Shane Douglas: OR DEAD! HA! HA! HA!

[[ Still the only one laughing. ]]

Shane Douglas: It's time to get the fuckin' scoop on World Warrior since the World title match is nothing but a bore! This is the true main event! Here's the SGW Tag Team Champions, THE MEN WHO'S GONNA' MAKE MARIA AND CHAVO SUCK THEIR FUCKIN' COCKS!..EDGE AND CHRISTIAN! THE FUCKIN' MEN!

[[ Edge and Christian come walking out on the stage wearing their SGW Tag titles on their shoulders. The small applause of respect for the two legends of the business dies down. Edge starts everything off. ]]

Edge: Thank you to all the legends, most of you, people Christian and I kicked the asses of on our way to where we are today!

[[ Edge points out to Kanyon. ]]

Edge: Kanyon, man...Want to join a stable? Swear to God we won't turn on you this time!

[[ EnC laugh. If you wasn't around for it, then don't ask. ]]

Christian: This week is going to be a very memorable moment in Solid Gold history. World Warrior marks the end of the biggest failure ever.

Bubba Ray Dudley: THANK GOD VENIS IS DROPPING THE TITLE!

[[ Bubba's outburst makes the legends do a double-take. ]]

Gangrel: Unbelievable.

The Sandman: WHAT THE FUCK?! VAL VENIS IS THE WORLD CHAMPION?

[[ Sandman takes a drag off his cigarette. ]]

The Sandman: Is SGW even fuckin' open still?!

Christian: Anyway...The failure that ends at World Warrior, besides Val's World title reign, is one Chavo Guerrero. Chavo has been nothing but a thorn in our sides, just like Val was until we demolished him in back-to-back pay-per-views! Chavo is different than any other opponent we've ever faced..Sure, Val was our friend at one time, but Chavo was the first guy to welcome Edge and I to SGW when we first started out. He showed us the ropes, who to stay away from, who to trust..

Edge: He helped us get better...And better we got.

Christian: Thanks to Chavo, Edge and I went on to win seventeen Tag Team titles, including our RECORD BREAKING FOURTH SGW Tag title reign together, four World titles, and we even were inducted into the official Wrestling Hall of Fame. We did it on our own, but Chavo planted the seeds.

[[ The legends look on in interest. EnC aren't degrading Chavo in any way. ]]

Edge: Chavo Guerrero was the ultimate underdog story. He fought the management, he fought the odds..He finally won the SGW World title, held it on two occasions. He used to have the wrestling world in the palm of his hand..Hell, Chavo's even the second-ever Grand Slam Champion in SGW history!

Christian: Impressive sure..But here's the facts. Here's what the record books don't explain.

Edge: Those World titles sure were easy to win when Christian and I were being told we weren't good enough to main event...They were a breeze when Jeff Jarrett wasn't in SGW. Chavo proved he was a flash in the pan and not a cemented main eventer by dropping those belts the VERY NEXT WEEK BOTH TIMES!

Christian: The Intercontinental, United States reigns? We all know those reigns were legitimate. That was the peak of Chavo. That's where he'd be at any other time in any other company..IN THE MIDCARD! And don't even get me started on his chairty Television title reign! He gave that damn title away as soon as he won it not to give someone else a chance..He did it because he knew he wasn't going to be able to keep that belt at all! He gave it away before someone TOOK IT AWAY!

[[ You can sense the bitterness coming from the duo. ]]

Edge: Now look at him..He's such a glory whore. When SGW comes back, so does Chavo. He comes in and gets a push because of his name value and his past achievements! And they talk about us being favored? Christian and I have EARNED EVERYTHING we've gotten in this business and in SGW. Chavo Guerrero has been surviving in this company thanks to weeks off, safe booking, and his past achievements..But this week at World Warrior...Him being a two-time SGW champion, a Hall of Famer...All of that doesn't..mean...a damn thing!

[[ Christian shakes his head and takes over. ]]

Christian: Chavo may claim to have been a mentor to us in the early days, we only used him to move up in the company. We leeched off Chavo's star power long enough to get ourselves the Tag titles. And now, we're sitting on top of the mountain, the same one he used to call home. The same one people like us kicked him off! Now this week, we face Chavo for the first time ever.

Edge: And the LAST time ever!

[[ Christian smiles and points back at the "THANK YOU CHAVO" banner. ]]

Christian: Tonight, we're honoring Chavo Guerrero..Because if it wasn't for his compassion, we'd not learned the ropes of SGW as quickly...And if it wasn't for his stupidity, we'd not be getting rid of Maria and him in the same night!

Edge: Chavo Guerrero has been having all these big "legend" comebacks to try to keep the history of SGW alive..Well, he needs to realize that his time is done. Chavo Guerrero was the man in 2002, this is 2006....The era of Edge and Christian has been running wild, running rampid all over wrestling SINCE! We're on top of this business because we're the best, not because everyone else is gone! Anyone who thought they were the best, they stepped up, and they got sent packing..

Christian: Chavo on the other hand relies on half-assing it against lackluster opponents to try to be cool. The days of him coasting off his legacy ends..Because at World Warrior..That legacy, Maria's ownership..His career...ENDS FOR GOOD!

[[ Edge takes his belt off his shoulder and holds it with both hands. ]]

Edge: He wants the Tag titles. He wants to be the only man in SGW history to legitimately win every available title. He wants to keep Maria with a job and bar us from ever getting title shots ever again, well, I hate to burst his bubble...But that's not gonna' happen! Tonight, we're honoring the career of Chavo Guerrero, Jr...Not because his Uncle Eddie is dead. We're not doing it to make ourselves feel better about ourselves...We're doing it because Chavo wants to try to go out with a bang.

Christian: Oh, he's going out with a bang alright.

Edge: Yep, when he bangs his head against the glass ceiling!

[[ The two share a laugh. ]]

Christian: Chavo may have broken through the original glass ceiling in SGW, we did the same. But us, when we did it, we didn't become a shell of our former selves. We're only BETTER than we used to be, not worse. Chavo's going to shoot for the moon, for one more time, he'll try to do the impossible...He wants that storybook ending, but instead, the ending for him and Maria won't end in a celebration or a title win...Instead, it'll end in tears, because they'll be two UNEMPLOYED RETARDS!

Edge: We are the standard in this business. We decide who elevates and who stays where they are. I hear Chavo beating and banging as we look down through the glass ceiling..And instead of letting him in, we just point and laugh. Because it's like this. Chavo USED to be something special, but everything has to come to an end..And at World Warrior..IT WILL!

Christian: So Chavo...Don't take this personally. You've never stood in our way of getting something, because we were on opposite ends of the card. Hell, we were actually on cards. We don't flex our achievements to get pay-to-wrestle appearances. We bust our asses every week to be better, we don't take weeks off to hide our weakenesses..On Sunday night, you're going to give everything you got.

[[ Christian readjusts the title belt on his shoulder and continues. ]]

Christian: But like always, it won't be enough! You're not facing Chris Masters or Randy Orton. You're teaming with a girl against the most dominant tag team not only in SGW, but the entire business. It's not going to be enough. Your career, her ownership is on the line...Everything you got inside you will be spilled to save your career...But it won't get the job done.. It won't do the deed against the two best wrestlers in SGW HISTORY!

Edge: Chavo Guerrero will not be remembered as the Grand Slam Champion. He'll be remembered as the man who stayed too long, who wouldn't let his ego shrink so he could open his eyes and see he was doing nothing but tarnishing his legacy! He'll be remembered as a martyr for the cause to save Maria's job...He'll be remembered forever in SGW history as the man Edge and Christian single-handedly KICKED OUT OF SOLID GOLD!

[[ Christian smirks. He speaks in a passionate tone, almost with a bit of remorse in his voice. ]]

Christian: But when you're in another company trying to make a living..Edge and I will always remember you, Chavo. We'll remember for you everything you helped us with. That banner saying thanks, this legends dinner for you honor...It's legitimate. It's from the heart. We'll remember everything you did for us in SGW.

Edge: From showing us the ropes, to us showing you the door..Thank you Chavo.

Christian: Thank you for stepping up, trying to be a hero to save Maria. Thanks to you, thanks to you being a shell of your former self..Accepting the match against us for Maria's job..Maria's going to lose her job a whole hell of a lot easier than we expected! You're the man, Chavo! Just sucks you're getting the boot too! But hey, that's what you get for being the hero!

[[ Edge flashes a cocky smile. ]]

Edge: Thank you, Chavo. Thank you for making SGW a whole lot easier on us. Thanks for sucking big time so we can easily beat you, retain our titles and finally get our push to the main event we deserve! We're doing you a favor, just like you're doing us a favor....We're helping you realize quick, right off the bat, that you're in no man's land stepping into the ring against us...You helping us get rid of Maria. Fair trade. Thank you, Chavo.

Christian: Chavo, you can call yourself an SGW legend, but you're the last legend on the list that we've not beaten. Your time has come to step in the ring with greatness. So for one night only, we'll allow you to step into our world..And when the match is over, you'll leave our world...And you'll leave our company...Because that's..

HOW...WE...ROLL!

[[ Edge looks into the camera. ]]

Edge: Don't even think of putting up a fight. SGW's fixing to be in search of a new owner come Sunday..That you can..

BANK ON!

[[ EnC hold their Tag titles high as they receive a mixed response from the legends in attendance. ]]

Christian: Thank you, Chavo.

[[ We slowly fade out as we catch one last glimpse of EnC holding their titles high in front of the "THANK YOU CHAVO" banner. The scene fades to black. ]]

[[ Static. ]]

Scott Smith || xxscottxsmithxx