The Rated R
Superstar Highly
Overrated: |
[[ Static. ]] [[ Fade up the SGW logo. ]] [[ Locker Room area - Before Total Destruction went off the air. ]] [[ We open up as Edge, Trish Stratus, and Tomko sit in Edge's locker room. Edge is still in his ring gear, covered in Christian's blood, and looking exhausted. He's standing in the middle of the room, gripping the ACW World title with all his might in both hands, with the faceplate staring at him. He smiles a sadistic grin, knowing he's surpassed Christian. ]] Edge: They always said, "Edge, you're great, but you're not Christian..You'll NEVER BE CHRISTIAN!" [[ Edge can't take his eyes off the title. ]] Edge: I was in line for the big SGW push, who got it? Christian. I could have been the big legend, but who got the hype? You guessed it..But, after tonight..I guess you can consider me doing what I did, dumping the dead weight that I've been carrying on my shoulders for five years.. [[ He brings the title close to his face, then kisses it for a second before bringing it back down. ]] Edge: ..Worth it. Trish Stratus: The plan worked to perfection..The plan almost four years in the making straight after the last SGW closed. It was all about timing, the right situation for it to happen..Mission accomplished. Edge: Everything works out in the end. [[ Edge and Trish kiss passionately, one of the kisses he and Stacy used to share. The sudden turn of Trish makes you sick and full of hatred for the way she backstabbed Christian. ]] Edge: Because now..Finally, I get the glory Christian hogged. I have four of his prized possessions..I have his career.. Trish Stratus: And you're making it better! [[ Edge slaps the ACW title. ]] Edge: I have his first World title.. Trish Stratus: Looks better on you than it did on him! [[ Edge points to Tomko who is standing by the door with his arms crossed. ]] Edge: I have his Problem Solver.. Trish Stratus: Tomko liked you better! [[ And Edge brings Trish close, staring her deep in the eyes. ]] Edge: And I have the girl of his dreams.. Trish Stratus: You've had me all along, Edge. Edge: Heh, I know. Trish Stratus: Christian's a fool to think I was messing around with other guys behind his back..I wasn't messing around with other guys, oh no..I was being treated right by a REAL MAN! I've been getting 'Rated R' since SGWx! Edge: Christian's first big achievement he tried raising over my head was the fact he had you as a manager. So, to put that to a hault, I decided to let you manage him, and let me..Get his benefits. [[ The make out for what seems to be an eternity. ]] Edge: Stacy Keibler was lucky I kept her around. I didn't care about her. I only used her for the Venis feud, then I decided to keep her around because I liked the stupid crap she said! We made the sex tape, it made me a fortune! Stacy was nothing more than just another notch on my belt..She was just a typical bitch with long legs who gave Venis credibility, but after I got done with her..I made her what she truly is..I MADE HER INTO THE SLUT SHE IS TODAY! AND NOW SHE'S KICKED TO THE CURB LIKE A SLUT! BECAUSE SHE IS A SLUT! Trish Stratus: Got that right. Edge: Christian should have known you were next for me. I mean, it's in my blood. Ruining my former friends' lives is what I do best. Matt Hardy, I flushed his six-year relationship with Lita down the toliet. Val Venis, we all know what happened there, HE'S WEARING MY SEMEN ON HIS FACE LIKE A MASK!...And Christian...His girl, his prized possession..Became mine! MINE! ALL MINE! IF I DID IT ONCE, I'LL DO IT AGAIN AND AGAIN BECAUSE I DAMN WELL CAN! Trish Stratus: You truly are the Rated R Superstar, the best Solid Gold has to offer, Edge! [[ He smirks, confident. ]] Edge: You're god damn right I am! [[ He lays the ACW World title down on a chair. ]] Edge: I proved that, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I am the superior competitor between Christian and I. I proved to the world and to myself that I am not just a backup, oh no..I'm not a backup, I AM THE STAR OF THE SHOW! I'm not playing second-fiddle, I'M THE MAN THE PEOPLE CAME TO SEE! Christian, that no good son of a bitch got what he had coming to him tonight in that ring. [[ He pauses. ]] Edge: A beating that only the Rated R Superstar, the true legend of Solid Gold Wrestling, and the ACW World Heavyweight Champion is capable of doing..I gave him a beating that no other soul could do for years! Val Venis, Bret Hart, Triple H, the FBI, none of them could stop Christian..NOBODY COULD DO IT BUT ME! BECAUSE I'M THE MAN! I'M THE BEST! ME! [[ Edge points to himself with both hands. ]] Edge: Let the people continue to question me and my abilities, but the achievements speak for themselves. I proved tonight that I am the real deal in Solid Gold Wrestling. Five-time Tag Team Champion, 2001 Pick Your Title Shot tournament winner, Gimmick champion, the first man to pin Christian's shoulders to the mat for three seconds since Mike Awesome in 2002..And now, ACW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION! PART ONE OF MY DESTINY IS COMPLETE.. Trish Stratus: And now phase two begins this week. The dawning of a new era. [[ Tomko nods, making his first movement of the night. ]] Tyson Tomko: ..Yep. Edge: And phase two consists of me finally getting my hands on what was unfairly ripped from my hands by Arn Anderson and Shane McMahon's backstabbing ways all those years ago. [[ Edge's eyes go wild. ]] Edge: THE SGW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE! Trish Stratus: Babe, consider it done. If I can get it on the waist of Christian, I can easily get it around your waist. [[ They kiss, Tomko looks on unphased. ]] Edge: The new era of the Rated R Superstar started tonight..It's out with the old and in with the new, and that's why I had to take Christian out of SGW like last week's garbage. That's why I had to use him as a stepping stone to get some recognition. I hold pinfall victories over three of the first six, ONE HALF, World Champions in this version of Solid Gold...And yet, THAT'S NOT ENOUGH? THAT DOESN'T MAKE ME ANY MORE TALENTED? SCREW THAT! I WAS TIRED OF WAITING ON GETTING NOTICED, SO I SINGLE HANDEDLY OPENED EVERYONE'S EYES! [[ You can feel the passion coming from every word Edge says. ]] Edge: And from here on out, I WILL single-handedly run rampid through every member of the SGW roster, from the top and to the bottom, until I reach my destiny..Until I get what I truly deserve..My name in the roll call of SGW World Heavyweight champions, just like my name is now enshrined in the history books of the All-Star Championship Wrestling World title. Trish Stratus: Oh trust me, getting the SGW title will be a breeze. In fact, it's going to be great watching you do what you do best..Wiping out all comers who think they can do what Christian couldn't do en route to getting what you deserve. Edge: Yeah, but let's get out of here..Tonight's my night to CELEBRATE! Trish Stratus: Are we getting..Rated R? [[ Trish looks at her new man with anticipation. ]] Edge: Tonight Trish..Edge love you..Long time. [[ Edge smiles and looks down at the ACW title once more, shaking his head, thinking hard on what he did to capture that. The scene fades. ]] [[ Later that night - After Total Destruction. ]] [[ The scene opens up inside of Val Venis' limousine that the new champion and his valet acquired earlier in the night. Tomko is up front, driving the new couple around town in Birmingham, Alabama. Edge and Trish share a seat, his ACW title sits on his lap, and Trish is cuddled up next to him under his left arm. ]] Trish Stratus: Tonight was another great night. Edge: This is just the beginning..Just the start of the new era for the Rated R Superstar. Tonight, we celebrate like we've never celebrated before! Because what we did tonight cannot be ignored and will never be forgotten in the history of Solid Gold Wrestling! I was the first man in years to take down Christian, and now I'M THE DAMN CHAMPION! [[ Edge puts his spare hand on his newly won title. ]] Trish Stratus: So where are we going? Edge: Well, the night's still young. Let's go somewhere, get a few drinks, and bask in celebration. [[ Edge knocks on the glass divider from the driver's seat and the back and Tomko rolls it down. ]] Edge: Tomko, first off, bad ass hat. Tyson Tomko: ..I know. Edge: Anyway, take us to the nearest restaurant. It's celebration time. [[ Tomko doesn't look back but he nods. ]] Edge: Oh, and Tomko.. Tyson Tomko: ..Hmm? Edge: When you get there, and you hear some noises, maybe see the limo rocking..Don't knock. [[ Before Tomko can reply, Edge finishes. ]] Edge: Because I'll be having sex. Wild, torrid, insane sex. [[ Tomko looks back with an eyebrow raised in interest. Edge points at Trish. ]] Edge: With Trish Stratus! Tyson Tomko: ..Cool. [[ Tomko slides the tinted glass back up, giving the champion and Trish their privacy. ]] Trish Stratus: You know who the first unlucky soul is that has to face the new and improved Edge, the greatest ACW World champion ever on Stroke? Edge: Does it really matter? Trish Stratus: Well, no. Edge: Let me guess..I face Kanyon in a "Fudge Packer's Match?" [[ He chuckles to himself. ]] Edge: Fudge Packer's Match..That's great. Trish Stratus: It's not that type of match. Edge: Yeah, I know. I just said that because Kanyon's gay. And I hate faggots. Trish Stratus: Well, they're good to design the interior of your house and all..But you are facing Kanyon on Stroke. Edge: Oh yeah? [[ Trish nods. ]] Edge: There not a wrestling company for faggots? Trish Stratus: No, PWR's been closed almost a year, babe. Edge: Right..Well, Kanyon's number hit to be the guy to have to face me one week after destroying the career and the life of Christian, eh? Trish Stratus: Yep. His debut match. Welcome to SGW, asshole. [[ Edge rubs his chin. ]] Edge: Who cares? I don't. Kanyon sucks, I rule. I don't see him wearing a title belt, a WORLD title belt at that..And I don't see his name all over the record books. Kanyon's going to wrestle one damn match in Solid Gold, then he'll jump to a new promotion. [[ Pause. ]] Edge: The other SGW. Satan's Gates of Hell Wrestling..BECAUSE CHRIS KANYON WILL BE DEAD!..And of course, faggots don't go to Heaven. And the other cool part of this SGW, it's like the real one..Because in it, the name stands for the truth..SATAN'S GONNA' WIN! Trish Stratus: Hmm. Edge: So, "who betta' than Kanyon?" More like, "who Kanyon jobbin' to first?" And that answer..ME! [[ Trish nods. ]] Edge: The real question is, "who better than Edge?" Ask Val Venis, ask Christian, ask Randy Orton, ask anyone "who better than Edge," and they'll say, "NOT A DAMN SOUL!" I'm going to beat Kanyon within an inch of his LIFE! I'm on a mission in SGW, stage two of my career starts this week on Stroke, and I will do what I have to do. AND I HAVE TO KICK CHRIS KANYON'S ASS! AND I'LL DO IT! I'LL DO IT WITH EASE, DAMMIT! Trish Stratus: He's one of the people who doubt your abilities, he's not a full believer. Edge: Well, I've opened a lot of eyes tonight when I left Christian laying in a pool of his own blood, his career over. I don't care to do it again if I have to. I'll make another example out of Kanyon, the "MVP." He's not SGW's Most Valuable Player! I'M MR. SOLID GOLD! I'M THE POSTER BOY OF SUCCESS! I'M THE NEXT SGW WORLD CHAMPION! ME! CALL ME THE MVP! [[ Edge looks furious. ]] Edge: I will rock Kanyon's world, I will welcome him into Solid Gold Wrestling, I will welcome him into MY WORLD..And on Stroke, week one of the new era of Edge, I will show him how I conduct business. He will know first hand who the man in SGW is. He can be the spokesman for the rest of the Solid Gold roster, when it's asked who the best is..I will obliterate Kanyon and leave him a bloddy, humiliated, MESS! Trish Stratus: That's what I like to hear, baby. [[ Edge smiles the bright smile of his that could light Vegas for a week as he stares at Trish, she turns and stares back. ]] Edge: I know...But enough about Kanyon. I don't want to worry about Chris Kanyon on the night of my celebration. He's not the prize I won for dumping my little brother and removing myself from his shadow.. Trish Stratus: You're right. [[ Trish unbuttons her white button up shirt, revealing her bra and a massive amount of cleavage. ]] Edge: Hell, it's not really even about the ACW title, that..That was just an added bonus. [[ Edge tosses the belt to the side on another seat, he brings Trish closer. ]] Edge: Beating him and snapping his precious winning streak and taking his Problem Solver..Screwing him over. No big deal to me. Because the only thing I was in it for was.. [[ Trish removes her shirt, now pressed closely to Edge in only her bra. Edge rubs his index finger from Trish's lip, all the way down the front of her body, stopping at the belly button. ]] Edge: Under your belly button.. [[ Edge slides his finger down the rest of the way, touching Trish's crotch with the finger, smiling.. ]] Edge: And between your thighs.. [[ They kiss passionately as we most likely know what happens next. The scene fades. ]] [[ While this is going on, a few minutes later, we cut to the front of the limousine. Tomko is driving and he's got the tunes blasting so he doesn't have to hear what's going on in the back. Tomko is staying true to his musical roots and listening to another flashback classic, "Joy to the World" by Three Dog Night. ]] Tyson Tomko: ..Was a good friend of mine. [[ The song continues and Tomko picks his spots. ]] Tyson Tomko: ...Helped him drink his wine. [[ The song progresses and Tomko taps his fingers against the steering wheel, kind of getting into the song. ]] Tyson Tomko: ..Tell you what I'd do. [[ The randomness of the lines he picks out is odd, but he's the singer. The back of the limo shakes like it was hit by an earthquake, Tomko has to readjust the limo back on the road quickly. He shakes his head and rolls his eyes, knowing what caused it. ]] Tyson Tomko: ...Idiots. [[ He continues driving, every now and then the limo will shake thanks to the activity going on in the back, but Tomko manages to keep the vehicle on the road, until.. ]] [[ Blue lights. ]] [[ Blue lights invade Tomko's rearview mirror. Tomko shakes his head and pulls the vehicle to the side of the road. A moment or two later, the policeman approaches the side of Tomko, who rolls down the window. ]] Policeman: G'night sir, how are you doin'? [[ Tomko nods. ]] Policeman: Sir, do you know why I pulled you over? [[ Tomko shakes his head 'no.' ]] Policeman: The back of your limousine was rocking, you were swerving a little bit. You've not been drinking tonight have you, sir? Tyson Tomko: ..Nope. Policeman: So, why was your limo rocking? Passengers back there doin' something? Tyson Tomko: ..Sex. [[ And, with perfect timing, Edge rolls down the glass divider from the two parts of the limo and steaks his head through to see what's going on. The only awkward thing about this is..The bra hanging from Edge's mouth and the pair of panties on his head like it's a hat. He sees the cop and spits he bra out. ]] Edge: Why'd you stop, Tomko? We got to celebrate the night. Tyson Tomko: ..Your fault. Edge: What have I done wrong? Policeman: Well sir, it looks like you're doin' somethin' right. [[ Edge looks suspicious and then removes the panties off his head. ]] Edge: It's what I do best. It's a little celebration after a victorious night. Policeman: What'd exactly did you do? Edge: Beat my brother to a bloody pulp and stole his best friend and girlfriend. [[ This takes the cop aback for a second. ]] Policeman: WHAT?! Edge: I'm a professional wrestler..The BEST wrestler at that. [[ Edge exits the hole and comes back flashing his ACW World title. ]] Edge: See? A belt. I'M THE DAMN CHAMPION! [[ He throws the belt back through the window. ]] Edge: So what seems to be assault and kidnapping..In the wrestling word, is just called "owning." Tyson Tomko: ..Yep. Policeman: Well, I take it the driver's your brother's best friend..So, where's the chick? She back there? Edge: Well, yeah. Want to meet her? Policeman: Well, yeah..To, you know..Verify the situation..And stuff. Edge: And to see her tits, right? [[ The cop shrugs. ]] Policeman: Hey, ain't nothin' wrong with that! [[ Trish sticks her head through the opening as Edge gets out of sight. You can see Trish from her head down to the end of her neck, just a few more inches from seeing the goods. ]] Trish Stratus: Hello, officer. [[ He's speechless. ]] Trish Stratus: Whatever we did wrong..I'm sure can be easily..Overlooked. [[ Trish leans more out, you can almost see a breast. ]] Trish Stratus: So officer, why don't you come over to the door, and let me show you how sorry..We are. Policeman: O..O..Okay. [[ The cop walks around to the back of the limousine, that's when you hear Edge scream. ]] Edge: GUN IT, TOMKO! [[ Tomko burns rubber out of site, leaving the cop in the dust. The scene fades. ]] [[ We open up several hours later, late into the night. We're back at Edge's hotel room after a very eventful night. Edge walks out of the bathroom wearing nothing but a towel. He looks determined and ready as he walks towards the bed. On the bed, the sheets are thrown down, laying on the bed is a half-nude Trish Stratus. She's wearing only a black bra and panties. Edge grabs her tight and they begin making out. ]] Trish Stratus: Well champ, it's time for your reward. Edge: I got to warn you Trish.. [[ He points to his cock covered by the towel. ]] Edge: This is a big cock. Trish Stratus: The bigger the better. [[ Trish rips the towel off, and we see Edge's ACW World title wrapped around his junk! Edge laughs and Trish smiles. They begin making out again, more passionately than every before. Trish removes the title belt and Edge takes off Trish's bra. He lays down on the bed and Trish mounts him, her tits flowing in the wind. Edge holds his title belt in one hand, and grabs a boob with his left. He smiles a huge smile as Trish dry humps him. ]] Edge: I NEVER BACKOUT ON MY PROMISES! I TOLD THE PEOPLE I WAS GOING TO HAVE SEX TONIGHT! [[ Trish starts kissing Edge from the chest all the way down until Edge's lower half and her are under the covers. Obviously, Trish is sucking Edge's dick. He smiles in total pleasure, because Edge is the god damn man. ]] Edge: THE CHAMP IS HAVING SEX WITH TRISH STRATUS! [[ Trish is going to down on Edge, and he just lays there enjoying every second of his success. At this point in time, it's clear, everything Edge did to Christian, was totally worth it. Trish pops her heads back up and Edge gets up, and he slams Trish on the bed on her back. Edge removes her panties and towers over her. ]] Edge: I'm fixing..To make you like Kanyon on Stroke..Screwed. [[ We see this going on from Edge's back, he grabs his schlong in his right hand, strokes it a few times and he sticks it in. We cut to the side view, and there's Edge just pounding that pussy, beating that shit like it stole something from him. Trish looks like this is almost..Hurting her. But her screams are of total pleasure. ]] Trish Stratus: YES! OOH! OOOH! FASTER! [[ Edge picks the speed up and hits it a few more times before pulling out. He takes his cock and sticks it between Trish's tits. Trish pushes her boobs together to tighten the grip on the penis. Edge starts going to town on those titties! Trish starts fingering herself and Edge belts out a deep laugh. ]] Edge: Just think Trish, right now, Kanyon's watching this..AND HE'S JACKING OFF TO ME! HE'S GETTING A HARD-ON NOT ONLY FOR MY AWESOMENESS...BUT FOR MY COCK! Trish Stratus: Put it back in, babe! [[ Edge oblidges and he lays down and puts Trish on top. Trish starts going up and down pretty slowly, like she's riding a bull or something, but then Edge grabs her hips and starts slamming that shit up and down repeatedly. Edge has sex, he doesn't make no mother fucking love. ]] Trish Stratus: OH EDGE! OH! OH! YES! [[ This continues and then Edge gets her off of him. Edge walks towards the camera, still nude, though we don't see anything because of the awesome cameraman we have who slides the camera up. We see Edge from his chest up. He grabs his ACW World title and smiles. ]] Edge: Usually, I'd let you teenage internet perverts and you horny bastards who wrestle with me get the free pass to watch me do what I do best inside the ring..And INSIDE THE SHEETS! But tonight's a different story. I'm the damn champion, I ended Christian's career! [[ Edge brushes the hair out of his eyes. ]] Edge: As god as my witness, Stroke this week will be a new beginning..THE ERA OF THE RATED R SUPERSTAR BEGINS! KANYON, YOU WILL FALL TO MY FEET A BLOODY MESS, YOU WILL BEG FOR MERCY..And you will tell me.."Edge, let me..SUCK YOUR COCK!" Because right now, you're not watching this promo to get a feel to what's coming your way in our match..YOU'RE WATCHING IT TO JACK OFF! TO GET OFF TO ME BECAUSE YOU'RE A FAGGOT! [[ Edge looks angered and disgruntled for a man who's in the process of getting laid. ]] Edge: I'm the ACW World Champion, I'm the best damn wrestler in this business..YOU'D BETTER BE WORRIED ABOUT NOT DYING IN THE RING INSTEAD OF LOOKING AT MY PENIS! This is going to be your debut in SGW, and it's also going to be your retirement from the wrestling ring! Because you're looking at a new Edge, a new Rated R Superstar..I have my destiny to fulfill, and you're standing in my way..So on Stroke, I'LL RETIRE YOUR ASS! I'LL PUT YOU IN A DAMN WHEELCHAIR! [[ Edge puts the title on his bare shoulder. ]] Trish Stratus: Babe, get back over here and finish..me...off. Edge: Now, if you perverts don't mind..I have a naked, big breasted, WOMAN to HAVE SEX WITH! AND YOU CAN'T WATCH! THIS ISN'T CINEMAX! THIS IS MY NIGHT OF CELEBRATION FOR BEING THE DAMN CHAMPION! [[ Edge throws down the title and grabs Trish and begins licking on her nipples like they're pieces of hard candy. He slams her hard on the bed and inserts his dick back in the damp cave. He starts thrusting back and forth, giving her what she wants, celebrating his night of being the man..The scene fades. ]] Edge: Oh..And if the people ask who's the man having sex in all his promos, and asking why..Tell 'em because I can..Because I am the..
[[ The scene fades. ]] [[ Static. ]] [[ The scene fades. ]]
Scott Smith || xxscottxsmithxx |
