Record:
Won: 0. Lost: 0. Drawn: 0.

Self-Attainment:
Official E-Fed Hall Of Fame: Inducted as Steve Corino (Class of 2004). CWO: Hall of Fame Inductee; CWO Caesar; Battle Royal Winner; World Heavyweight Champion (3); Intercontinental Champion; Tag Team Champion; Greatest Matches (2); Superstar of the Year (2002); Most Consistent (2002); Greatest Match Participant (2002); Best Angle (2002); Best Manager (2002). AWE: World Heavyweight Championship #1 Contender; Tag Team Champion. CWE: World Heavyweight Championship #1 Contender; Tag Team Champion; Hardcore Champion; Greatest Matches. HHF: Hall of Fame Inductee; World Heavyweight Champion (2); Intercontinental Champion; Tag Team Champion. HWF: World Heavyweight Champion (6); Intercontinental Champion; Tag Team Champion. TNW: World Heavyweight Champion. SPW(e): (Co) World Heavyweight Champion; Joint Royal Rumble Winner. sPw: Hall of Fame Inductee; the sPw Grandslam; World Heavyweight Champion; Intercontinental Champion (2); European Champion; Tag Team Champion. PWF: Intercontinental Champion; Tag Team Champion. RW: World Heavyweight Championship #1 Contender; Tag Team Champion. SGWx: World Heavyweight Championship Tournament Finalist. APW: X-Treme Champion; Greatest Matches. WDW: Intercontinental Champion. XWF: World Heavyweight Champion; Hardcore Champion; Power Rankings (2nd; 15/06/06) (1st; 22/06/06) (1st; 29/06/06) (2nd; 06/07/06) (2nd; 13/07/06) (1st; 20/07/06) (1st; 30/07/06) (1st; 04/08/06) (1st; 10/08/06) (1st; 17/08/06) (1st; 24/08/06); Top Five Rankings (10); Fighter of the Week (3); Brawl of the Week (4). SGW: XWF World Heavyweight Champion (Denounced); CWO World Heavyweight Champion; Gold of the Week (2); Formerly Banned. MLW: World Heavyweight Champion. AWA: World Heavyweight Champion (1st); Tag Team Champion; Retired Undefeated. CEW: Top Ten Rankings (1).

Cutting Edge Wrestling
Exile: 4th Edition
The Guru Vs. Hollywood Hulk Hogan

Static.

Fade up.

Alex Shelley: Sweet mother of pearl…

Shelley stands gob smacked as he gazes at the thousands of steps cut into the mountainside that ascend and disappear from sight high into the clouds.

Alex Shelley: … up there?

He said with a gulp, hoping Russo was joking.

Vince Russo: No, I meant the other set of giant steps goin’ up the mountain.

Russo said sarcastically.

Alex Shelley: Phew!

Shelley looked around. It dawned on him that there were no other set of giant steps.

Alex Shelley: Oh. Well, I’m going to be honest with you here Russo… I’m not going up there. No way. You can’t make me.

Vince Russo: Christ almighty! Quit bein’ the fuckin’ pussy, that’s why she’s here and she’s enough pussy for this whole fuckin’ stable.

Russo pointed to SoCal Val, wearing a large woollen tunic, who looked unimpressed.

SoCal Val: Charming.

She sarcastically gave a pretentious smile.

Vince Russo: Besides, up that mountain we’ll find da’ man we’re lookin’ for.

Alex Shelley: I always knew you were on the prowl for a man.

Russo glared at the smug looking Shelley.

Vince Russo: Like I was sayin’, up that mountain we’ll find the man who’ll make sure you and Black Machismo get to the top in Cuttin’ Edge Wrestlin’!

Alex Shelley: Don’t worry, Russo. I’ll help you find the man…

Vince Russo: Yea’, you’re damn right you will.

Alex Shelley: … the man of your dreams, that is. Just tell, what are you looking for in Mr Right?

Vince Russo: Well, I’ll tell ya’ who I ain’t lookin’ for – another smart ass cock sucking whore like you. So get up that fuckin’ mountain before I send you back Ring of Horrible or wherever the fuck it is that you came from!

As Russo sets foot on the first step Jay Lethal jumps in front of him, decked out in retro sunglasses and full multicoloured Macho Man attire (cowboy hat included).

Jay Lethal: NO.

Lethal gulped.

Jay Lethal: I GOT BAD VIBES ABOUT THIS PLACE BOSS, YEAH. SEEMS TOO FAMILIAR. A LITTLE TOO FAMILIAR, YEA’UH. LIKE… LIKE… LIKE… THE DANGERZONE!

Russo cocks his eyes into a squint.

Vince Russo: ‘The hell you on about, Lethal? The Dangerzone?

Lethal removes the sunglasses looking revealing a goofy “madness” stare that looks Russo dead in the eye.

Jay Lethal: YEAH, THE DANGERZONE!

Alex Shelley: You’re supposed to be Savage, not Shamrock you tool.

Jay Lethal: I DON’T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I’M TALKIN’ ‘BOUT, YEAH. I’VE BEEN THERE MANY A TIME, YEAH. FOR THIRTY DAYS AND THIRTY NIGHTS! YEAH, I’VE BEEN IN THE DANGERZONE – EAST OF THE PACIFIC OCEAN, WEST OF LONDON ENGLAND…

Lethal points to the sky…

Jay Lethal: …SOUTH OF MARS!

… and then to the ground.

Jay Lethal: … AND NORTH OF HELL, YEA’UH!

SoCal Val eases the tension by rubbing Lethal’s shoulders. Russo seems unconvinced.

Vince Russo: Then I guess you better lead the way then.

Alex Shelley: It still just looks like steps to me.

Jay Lethal: DANGERZONE, YEAH!

The group start their ascent.

Cut.

1,652 steps later…

Alex Shelley: Finally!

Jay Lethal: DIG IT! YEAH!

Alex Shelley: Hey, tell me we didn’t just leave Shark Boy down there, did we?

Vince Russo: Fuck him. He didn’t wanna’ listen to me, then he can fuckin’ stay and rot in the lower-card with Lance Hoyt.

Russo places his hands on his hips, looking into shot with a huge grin on his face. The camera pans around to show massive large wooden doors, before zooming out to reveal what appears to be some ancient temple.

Vince Russo: Now that’s what I’m talkin’ about.

The doors mystically open.

They enter.

They look around timidly.

Candles are lit everywhere. Monks are kneeling all around deep in prayer.

Jay Lethal: IF I DIDN’T KNOW ANY BETTER, YEAH, THEN I’D SAY THAT THEY WERE BOWING. BOWING, YEAH. BOWING DOWN TO THE KINGDOM OF MADNESS, YEAH.

Vince Russo: That’s because you don’t know any better.

Russo tapped one of the Monks on the shoulder. He stood up and greeted the travellers with a courteous bow.

Vince Russo: I’m lookin’ for a man they call Sonjay Dutt.

The Monk smiled wide-eyed at Russo.

Vince Russo: Son-jay… Du-tt.

The Monk smiled wide-eyed at Russo.

Russo looked impatient.

Alex Shelley: Maybe he doesn’t understand you.

Vince Russo: Oh really? How perceptive of you, Alex.

Alex Shelley: And besides do we REALLY want to find Sonjay Dutt? I mean come on, Sonjay Dutt? What’s that all about? You aren’t going nuts like Flair did, are you?

Vince Russo: Trust me, I know what I’m doin’. I single-handedly took Raw from a 1.8 to a 8.1. I da’ guy who made Stone Cold Steve Austin who he is today.

Alex Shelley: A wifebeater?

Vince Russo: No.

Russo seemed unimpressed.

Alex Shelley: You made him suck?

Vince Russo: No.

Alex Shelley: I dunno then… fat?

Vince Russo: No I didn’t make him fat, I made him a household name, you fuckin’ cock. And that’s just what I’m gonna’ turn you and Black Machismo into with a little help from Sonjay Dutt. They don’t call him the playa from the Himalaya for nothin’. This guy has it. He’s got attitude. He’s got edge. And, he’s got some fuckin’ talent.

Alex Shelley: Talent? I have talent on loan from God.

Vince Russo: Besides it’s too late, I forged his signature on the C.E.W contract and now he’s gotta’ fight Hollywood Hulk Hogan.

Jay Lethal: HOGAN?!

Jay comes marching into shot.

Jay Lethal: DID SOMEBODY MENTION THE NAME HULK HOGAN?!

Vince Russo: Actually, yes.

Jay Lethal: HOGAN’S NO FRIEND OF MINE, YEAH! HE STABBED ME IN THE BACK, YEAH. TURNED ON ME, YEAH. SLEPT WITH MY WIFE, YEAH. RUINED MY MARRIAGE. YEAH. HE’S THE REASON I GOT DIVORCED!

Lethal makes a “call me” sign – Macho-esque - with his taped hand.

Jay Lethal: YEAH, I’MSTA GET ME A PIECE OF HOGAN ON EXILE. BE A MAN, HULK! BE A MAN! ON EXILE, HE’LL ENTER THE DANGERZONE, YEAH, HE’LL FEEL THAT RUSH…. BUT NOT THE RUSH THAT I GET WHEN I GET UP ON THAT TOP ROPE, YEAH. WHAT A RUSH, YEAH. YEAH, HE’LL FEEL THE RUSH ALRIGHT AND HE’LL EAT MY REAR ROCKETS AND LIKE IT, YEAH!

Vince Russo: No, Jay. Dutt’s gonna’ fight Hogan on Exile. It’s already been signed.

Jay Lethal: BUT HE SLEPT WITH ELIZABETH, YEAH!

Jay points at SoCal Val.

SoCal Val: I’m not Elizabeth.

Jay Lethal: THAT SWOLLEN EYE HE GOT AT WRESTLEMANIA NINE WASN’T BECAUSE OF NO JET SKI ACCIDENT IF YOU KNOW WHAT I’M SAYING, YEAH. SO WHAT’CHA GONNA’ DO HULK, YEAH WHAT’CHA GONNA’ DO THIS SUNDAY NIGHT WHEN BLACK MACHISMO GIVES YOU MORE THAN JUST A BLACK EYE!

Alex Shelley: Jay who are you talking to? Hogan isn’t here.

Vince Russo: He’s not gonna’ fuckin’ fight Hogan anyway. You don’t have a fuckin’ match with him!

Jay Lethal: WHO SAID ANYTHING ABOUT A MATCH? YEAH. I’M GONNA’ PUNCH HIM IN THE FACE BACKSTAGE, YEAH. JUST LIKE WRESTLEMANIA NINE, YEAH. MACHO MADNESS IS COMIN’ TO GET YOU, HULK. YEAH!

Vince Russo: Fine, whatever.

By this time another Monk has joined the frays of the conversation.

Monk: My friend he take vow of si’wence.

The Monk spoke with a comical Chinese accent.

Alex Shelley: A vow of science?

Monk: No, a vow of si’wence. He no spoken for eight years.

Vince Russo: Yea’, no shit. Talk about tryin’ to get blood from a stone.

Monk: You say you w’ook for man?

Vince Russo: Sonjay Dutt.

Monk: No man in here comes with him a w’abel.

Russo pondered.

Vince Russo: Well, he’s Indian. He’s a dirty lookin’, hard to find, sand nigger.

Alex Shelley: You cannot say that.

Monk: We are all childw’en of same w’ife force.

Jay Lethal: DON’T BE TALKIN’ BOUT MY WIFE! YEAH, DROP THE ELBOW ON YOU YEAH.

Vince Russo: Here!

Russo pulls out a photgraph from his shirt pocket.

The Monk looks at it.

Monk: Oh, him. Ha-Why didn’t you say?

Russo looked incensed with anger.

Monk: Fow’ow me.

Cut.

Russo, Shelley, Lethal and SoCal Val follow the Monk who is carrying a burning torch along a stone hallway…

Monk: He came to us a bw’oken man. He had w’ost the will to sustain his existence ever since Sabu w’eft for ECW. But the w’ife-force once again smiles upon him…

The Monk stops outside a small wooden door and opens it.

Monk: He is at peace.

They’re jaws drop.

The inside of the room is extremely bright. It’s filled with many marvellous animals. Tigers, lions, birds, monkeys, lizards, insects and many more…. All of whom sit silently.

In the middle Sonjay Dutt levitates, cross legged, above the ground humming some mantra deep in meditation.

Alex Shelley: I take it back, Russo. You’re a fuckin’ genius. The guy can fly! We’re destined for the top now! I mean at first I thought Hogan would annihilate this loser, but compared to him now… pffft I’m starting to think that Hulkamania was just some fad like the Rubik’s cube!

Dutt opens his eyes.

the Guru: Greetings and salutations, friends.

He swung his legs forward and hoisted himself off what appeared to be a see-through Perspex platform. He stood hands clasped behind his back in what appeared to be a silver version of the Peter Pan fancy dress costume.

Alex Shelley: I take that back. Not only is Hogan gonna’ kill him, but he’s gonna’ send his remains back to Never-Neverland just to send a message to all the other lost boys.

Russo still appears speechless in disbelief.

Alex Shelley: Honestly, don’t be ridiculous, not for one minute did I think that he could seriously fly.

Vince Russo: Sonjay? Is that you?

the Guru: Why yes, Vince. It is I.

Vince Russo: What in the name of FUCK happened to you?!

The Guru smiled pleasantly, ever relaxed.

the Guru: I figured out that I needed to look inside myself, really find out who I am.

Alex Shelley: So who are you then?

the Guru: I’m the Guru, Sonjay Dutt.

Alex Shelley: The what?

the Guru: I have undergone a spiritual transformation. This is the new Sonjay Dutt.

Vince Russo: Fuck that and fuck the Guru.

Russo pacing the room in frustration.

the Guru: Hmmm… I’m sensing a great negative energy force in the room. It seems to be emitting from you, Vince. Have you ever tried tantra--?

Russo cut him off.

Vince Russo: Is this a fuckin’ joke? I didn’t sign no fuckin’ quack called the Guru. What the hell happened to the Playa’ from the Himalaya thing? I need the OLD Sonjay Dutt.

the Guru: I’m sorry, but the old Sonjay Dutt is gone and buried. The Playa’ from the Himalaya is gone. I am no longer that man, Vince. I have changed.

Vince Russo: No fuckin’ shit.

the Guru: The man whom you now seek is but a departed memory from the past. The man you signed to that wrestling contract no longer exists.

Vince Russo: No, I don’t think you don’t understand. I went out of my way to get you a match against Hogan.

Jay Lethal: I’LL TAKE THE MATCH, YEAH I’LL TAKE IT. MAKE HULK SEE, MAKE HIM SEE YEAH, THAT HULKAMANIA IS LIKE A SINGLE GRAIN OF SAND, YEA’UH, IN THE SAHARA DESERT THAT IS MACHO MADNESS!

the Guru: Hmmm…. Good metaphor, Jay.

Jay Lethal: WOAH! WHAT’S THAT ALL ABOUT, YEAH? HOW DO YOU KNOW MY NAME?

the Guru: Because I know everything, Jay. You see, I’m the Guru.

Sonjay beamed a cheesy smile.

Alex Shelley: He’s seen you on T.V. … idiot.

Vince Russo: Jay for the eighth time, you are not getting’ the match.

Jay Lethal: BUT HE SLEPT WITH MY WIFE.

He points to SoCal Val.

SoCal Val: We’re not married and… euugh.

She shudders.

SoCal Val: I did NOT sleep with Hogan. I wouldn’t sleep with him even if he paid me too. He’s old enough to be my Great-Great-Great-Great-Great-Great-Grandfather!

Alex Shelley: Would you sleep with me if I paid you to?

Jay Lethal: BACK OFF, SHELLEY!

the Guru: Jay, you don’t want to fight Hogan for revenge.

Jay Lethal: I DON’T?

Jay looks confused.

the Guru: Two wrongs don’t make a right. After all, an eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.

The Guru stunk of a self-smugness.

the Guru: And I cannot fight him either, for although I regard myself as a soldier – I am now but a soldier of peace.

Vince Russo: But you have the TALENT to beat him!

the Guru: Even so, I cannot leave for I am needed here at the Ashram.

The monk quickly imposed himself in on the conversation.

Monk: If I may interject, we are short of space AND it is w’ery important for you to use your ta’wents.

the Guru: But my journey of inner discovery is not yet complete. I am yet to attain omnipresent super galactic oneness.

Monk: No…?

The Monk feigns surprise at this recent development.

Monk: Wait! There it is! You’ve just attained it!

the Guru: I have? Hmmm….

Sonjay seemed sceptical.

Monk: Yes. Yes! You are one. I can see it in your eyes. You are more one than anyone. You are SO one that you can now beat How’ywood Hulk Hogan! Go… go my child!

the Guru: Hmmm…. what about my medallion of spiritual accomplishment?

Monk: Take mine!

It appeared the Monk seemed very eager to rid the ashram of Sonjay. He yanked the medallion from his neck and spilled it into Sonjay’s hands.

the Guru: This took you 80 years to achieve!

Monk: I give it to you in w’ight of a better cause.

Russo picked up on where the Monk was going.

Vince Russo: Yeah, this is a better cause. You see, Hulkamania is like a disease in da’ wrestlin’ world. It’s the wrestlin’ fuckin’ equivalent of AIDS and it’s tryin’ to spread. And only you have the power to cure it and save C.E.W!

the Guru: Well, then…

Sonjay raised the medallion of spiritual accomplishment into the air…

the Guru: In light of this personal sacrifice I have no choice but to beat Hulk Hogan!

Vince Russo: Now that’s more like it!

Jay Lethal: I DROPPED THE ELBOW FIVE TIMES ON HOGAN, YEAH, FIVE TIMES OFF THE TOP ROPE… AND HE STILL GOT UP, YEA’UH!

Alex Shelley: Yeah, Jay’s got a point. You’re gonna’ need a game-plan… a strategy of attack.

the Guru: There is no need to attack. For whenever you are confronted with an opponent, conquer him with love.

Russo slapped the palm of his hand against his own forehead in frustration.

the Guru: I do not believe in violence. It is much easier to destroy than it is to create. However, in such extreme cases where there is only a choice between cowardice and violence, I do believe that I would advise violence.

Alex Shelley: Well today’s your lucky day then, Sonjay, cause the n.W.o are trying to take over Cutting Edge Wrestling. They’re trying to take away our freedom… we can’t stand back and let it happen. We have to fight for what we believe in!

Jay Lethal: DIG IT, YEAH!

the Guru: Hmmm… it appears the situation is more serious than I had assumed. If this is the case, Hogan must be stopped. I must fight to sustain peace. I must fight for good. Quickly, there is no time. I must prepare at once.

Vince Russo: Look, just avoid the big boot and leg-drop and you’ll be fine.

the Guru: Attention to detail is key, Vince. Preparation is the greatest weapon of them all. Hmmm… I will need more information on his wrestling style.

Vince Russo: There is nothing else.

the Guru: Then it appears the situation is also a lot easier than I had assumed.

Alex Shelley: Just use the force!

the Guru: I am Hindi, not Jedi.

Alex Shelley: Aren’t they the same thing?

the Guru: No…

Sonjay paused.

the Guru: …only similar.

Jay Lethal: SO WHAT’CHA GONNA’ DO? WHAT’CHA’ GONNA’ DO, YEAH, WHEN THE TWENTY-FOUR INCH PYTHONS COME FOR YOU YEA’UH?

the Guru: Luckily for me, I am at one with all creatures of nature… including snakes.

Sonjay said as he caressed a boa-constructor that was draped over his shoulders.

Jay Lethal: NO HIS ARMS MAN, YEAH. HIS ARMS?!

Alex Shelley: Yeah, how are you gonna’ beat Hogan?

the Guru: Let’s just say that in attaining my omnipresent super galactic oneness I have obtained mystical supernatural like physical ability brought upon my heightened psychological awareness and mental attributes.

Shelley doesn’t buy.

Alex Shelley: Like what for example?

the Guru: The reflexes of a cat and the speed of a mongoose.

Replied Sonjay modestly as he buffed his fingernails.

Jay Lethal: I WAS TEN THOUSAND YEARS INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION, AND I DIDN’T GET NO SUPERNATURAL POWERS YEAH.

the Guru: Some of life’s great questions remain unanswered, Jay. Like why is the grass green? Why is the sky blue? Why is Hogan even still alive? And why do birds… suddenly appear… every time… you are near?

Alex Shelley: Tell me what wasn’t the Carpenters?

the Guru: Jesus was a carpenter.

Alex Shelley: Yeah, by trade.

Vince Russo: Right now that Sonjay’s on board, let’s get the fuck out’a here. We gotta’ be back in Pittsburgh by tonight!

the Guru: Wait…

Vince Russo: Oh what now?!

the Guru: There is one thing I must do before I go.

Vince Russo: What?!

the Guru: Meditate.

Cut.

10 minutes later…

Sonjay re-enters the room seeming agitated.

the Guru: Hogan MUST be stopped.

Vince Russo: That’s what I wanna’ hear! Squash that bald son of a bitch!

the Guru: He is preventing me from reaching my inner sanctum.

Jay Lethal: WHAT YOU TALKIN’ BOUT?!

the Guru: I couldn’t meditate. It seems that the force of Hulkamania is imposing itself within my quiet self-reflection. When I close my eyes, when I reach that inner plain… I cannot find peace. I cannot find tranquillity. Instead all I hear is a chant…

Alex Shelley: But you’re supposed to hear a mantra.

the Guru: Not this one. All I hear is thousands of voices begging for “One More Match”…

The Guru shook his head.

the Guru: …from Hogan.

Vince Russo: Well, Sonjay seems like I’ve got the solution to your problem. Make Hogan’s one more match… HIS LAST! Make it the last match that bald piece of shit ever wrestles in!

the Guru: I will, Vince. My moral obligation senses that peace and tranquillity must be restored.

Fade out.

Black.

Static.

Intermission…

Fade in.

We see Russo sitting in the backstage area, with his feet slung up onto the table in front him.

He’s dressed in casual looking clothes with a baseball cap on.

Vince Russo: There’s only one way for me to do this and that’s for me to tell it like it is. He tried to sue my ass before, well now I ain't liable for shit – so let's see him fuckin’ try.

Russo sneered with contempt.

Vince Russo: From Day 1, since I had been in WCW I done nothing... nothing but deal with the bullshit of the politics from behind the curtain. I fought the corner of the guys who week in week out had busted their asses for WCW. I stood up for the Booker Ts, the MIA, the Filthy Animals and the Jeff Jarrets. And now, I'm standin' up for the guys who give a shit about THIS company, Cuttin' Edge Wrestlin'... the Sonjay Dutts, the Alex Shelleys, the Jerry Lynns and the CM Punks. So allow me to start off by pointin' out the big problem we got here - that being - guys who don't give a shit about C.E.W... like that God damn politician Hulk Hogan.

Russo’s voice was laced with an underlying hatred.

Vince Russo: It it was up to me nobody would have seen that piece of shit ever again afta' WCW.

He repositioned his cap.

Vince Russo: Well now that we’re in C.E.W it seems like Hogan wants to go back to his old ways and play his "creative control" card again. How so fuckin’ overused, Hulk, huh? A little like you’re whole gig, eh?

Russo smirked.

Vince Russo: See, as we speak Hogan's backstage tryin’ t’ah wheel and deal his way out of his match at this week's Exile 'cause he knows that he can't beat Sonjay Dutt. Hogan knows Dutt’s gonna’ beat him, he knows he’s gonna’ knock him out’a the title tournament… so he’s doin’ what he’s always done and gone cryin’ to the powers that be. Instead of bein’ a fuckin’ man that piece of shit's tryin' to throw his weight behind a proposed "storyline" that'll make sure that even if Dutt out-shows him on Sunday Night that he'll still get through to the tournament final because of it. And I'll tell ya' what, it'll be a damn shame if anyone falls for his fuckin’ con. I just pray to fuckin’ God that he gets turned down flat on his fuckin’ face. ‘Cause it’ll be a shame to guys like Lynn and Punk who bust their asses every week, a shame to ‘em because only one of them can go through… yet fine and fuckin’ dandy for Hulk Hogan who’s gonna’ make sure that gets to the Pay Per View by doing fuck all! Let me ask ya’ somethin’, how come one of those guys don’t get “the deal”? How come Punk or Lynn don’t get the storyline that means both of ‘em can advance? Hogan doesn’t bust his ass week in week out… why’s he entitled to it? Hogan ain’t better than ‘em. It’s not like he deserve it more than ‘em. He just thinks he does.

Russo appeared passionate about the subject matter.

Vince Russo: Hogan ain’t nothin’ but a piece of shit.

An intensity burned in his eyes.

Vince Russo: A no talented, bald, piece of fuckin’ shit.

His tone was stone-cold of emotion.

Vince Russo: If Hogan wants to get the C.E.W World Heavyweight title, then he’ll do it like everyone else. He’ll have to beat Sonjay Dutt – somethin’ I doubt very much he’ll be able to do – ‘cause if he gets what he wants, the whole fuckin’ roster will know why it happened and I don’t think they’re gonna’ be too pleased to hear that the guys upstairs cave in to superstar demands. If they bow to Hogan and appease him, they’re gonna’ have to appease everyone else. So Hogan, you big bald son’u’va bitch, KISS MY ASS!!

Cut.

Static.

the Guru believes:

Satisfaction does not come with achievement, but with effort. Full effort is full victory.

That is why that on this Sunday Night on Exile the Guru will reign victorious over Hollywood Hulk Hogan no matter what.