(Mister Entertainment lines up HAL and DROPKICKS him ... RIGHT OFF THE SIDE OF THE SHIP! CUTTO: a shot from off the boat, with HAL going off the side, and falling all the way down to the water, where only a strategically-placed liferaft breaks his fall.)
CROWD: "HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT!"
(CUTTO: Back on the ship.)
GHEORGHE: "HAL JUST WENT RIGHT OFF THE SIDE OF THE SHIP! THAT HAD TO BE ALMOST A TWO STORY DROP!"
JIVE: "And who better to send him off than MISTER ENTERTAINMENT!"
JULIUS: "I don't know if he's done yet. Look where he's going now!"
GHEORGHE: "Mister Entertainment is getting ON TOP of the ship wall! He wouldn't!"
JIVE: "I think he's going to!"
JULIUS: "This is NOT going to end well!"
GHEORGHE: "Mister Entertainment is contemplating NEAR SUICIDAL ACTIVITY HERE! DON'T! JUST DON'T!"
(CUTTO: the off-ship shot again, as MISTER ENTERTAINMENT takes the PLUNGE! Going off the side of the boat with a 450 SPLASH!)
CROWD: "N-E-W! N-E-W! N-E-W! N-E-W!"
GHEORGHE: "I CAN HARDLY BELIEVE WHAT WE ARE SEEING! NOT ONLY did Mister Entertainment send HAL off the side of the ship ... he then went HURDLING DOWN ONTO HAL! They could be SERIOUSLY injured here!"
JULIUS: "I honestly don't think anyone cares right now! We're all taking in this crazy shit!"
JIVE: "I thought Mister Entertainment might have trouble delivering with a second consecutive entertaining match tonight, but I LOVE IT!"
GHEORGHE: "And if we can ever get a referee down there, one of these men CAN make a pinfall out there. We had referees posted on each deck of the ship prior to the match ... but I don't think ANYONE expected this to go OFF THE SHIP!"
JIVE: "Is there any question? This match should be automatically awarded to Mister Entertainment, the undisputed BEST WHADAHTT ON TV Champion!"
JULIUS: "Sick. Shit. That's about all I can say right now."
GHEORGHE: "I have to wonder if either of these men will be able to continue this match! We have a camera crew for the World Tag Team Championship match down there, and they are picking up the action now ..."
(CUTTO: a view of HAL and Mister Entertainment in the water, the liferaft nowhere to be seen.)
GHEORGHE: "I think they SANK the liferaft!"
JIVE: "It just EXPLODED from too much entertainment! HAHA!"
JULIUS: "Even your lame jokes can't taint this at the moment. Just look! Those two crazy bastards are swimming toward JET SKIS now!"
(True as it is, HAL and Mister Entertainment board two jet skis, and rev up their engines as the crowd gathers at the ship's walls, watching in anticipation of what's next!)
JIVE: "Amazing! They just plunged from two stories up to the water, sank a liferaft .. and now jet skis! Get those men light sabers and let's have a 'Jedi Returns'-esque moment!"
GHEORGHE: "I don't know about that ... but Mister Entertainment is in hot pursuit of HAL! The two ride around the ship on those jet skis, with the crowd cheering them on to go faster! HAL sees Mister Entertainment veering close ... and takes a swing at Mister Entertainment! That causes the Champion to swerve away, and HAL follows him, banging his jet ski against Mister Entertainment's! But Mister Entertainment returns the hit, smacking his jet ski against HALs! HAL veers off course and Mister Entertainment hits him again! HAL nearly WIPES OUT near the ring out on the water, for the World Tag Team Championship match, and then stops his jet ski and gets INTO that ring! Mister Entertainment rounds to follow!"
JULIUS: "And these two officially have reached new heights of uncontainability. It takes not one ring ... not one ring and a CRUISE SHIP ... but a cruise ship and TWO RINGS to get their business finished!"
JIVE: "And who knows where else before they're done!"
GHEORGHE: "These two have fought around in rings and around arenas, regardless, and now they've taken things into the water and on a floating ring! Mister Entertainment is approaching the ring and stops his jet ski and gets on the apron .. SPRINGBOARD into the ring ... NO! HAL hits the ropes and knocks the Champion off balance and CRASHING to the mat!"
JULIUS: "A few crazy ass moves will teach a man to keep Mister Entertainment under a no-fly rule for the rest of the match."
GHEORGHE: "I think HAL would love to keep Mister Entertainment grounded if he can. He picks up the Champion up and PLANTS him with a side slam. HAL gets Mister Entertainment back up and PRESSES him into the air! HAL PITCHES MISTER ENTERTAINMENT OUT OF THE RING! BUT THE CHAMPION SOMEHOW GRABS THE TOP ROPE AND LANDS ON THE APRON!"
JIVE: "HAL doesn't even notice!"
GHEORGHE: "HAL thinks he was successful in getting Mister Entertainment into the water, but he's about to get a big surprise ... as Mister Entertainment gets up and jumps over the apron with a FACEBUSTER ON HAL!"
JIVE: "HAL celebrating anything tonight is just unacceptable to Mister Entertainment! He won't take any of HALs nonsense!"
GHEORGHE: "The self-proclaimed ON TV Champion peppering HAL with some tae kwon do strikes .. now a whip, but HAL reverses! Mister Entertainment ducks under an attempted clothesline, comes back as HAL ducks down ... Tornado DDT by Mister ... NO! HAL keeps him held in midair, shifts the Champion ...CTRL + ALT + DEL! HAL DRIVES MISTER ENTERTAINMENT DOWN TO THE CANVAS!"
JULIUS: "Mister Entertainment just took THAT SHIT from HAL! Flush!"
GHEORGHE: "HAL still with some fight left in him, even after that devastating fall off the ship, AND Mister Entertainment landing that 450 Splash from off the ship! Great resiliency exhibited by the young talent HAL!"
JIVE: "That all sounds great, but there's one problem ..."
JULIUS: "And what's that?"
JIVE: "HAL finally has Mister Entertainment down for the count ...but there's no referee! HAHA!"
JULIUS: "True. Lady luck isn't in HALs corner tonight."
GHEORGHE: "With all that's happened, I think it's lucky these two still have enough in them to be competing at all! And for all his yelling over here, I think HAL is realizing a ref isn't going to come in time to count any pinfall. He picks up Mister Entertainment and it looks like he could be going for a SECOND CTRL + ALT + DEL!"
JULIUS: "He hits that, and the Champ might be put away for good!"
GHEORGHE: "Here we go! But Mister Entertainment counters the attempt! DDT by Mister Entertainment, and both men are down as the referee is approaching the ring on a raft!"
JIVE: "Better now than when only Mister Entertainment was down! HA!"
JULIUS: "Can't do anything about it. You know the referees don't get extra travel pay for this shit! Their lazy asses will take their sweet ass time."
GHEORGHE: "Somehow I don't think that's what the referees are thinking. They put out a great effort for NEW. As Jack Markakis comes to the ring, HAL is stirring ... and now he's LEAVING the ring as Mister Entertainment is getting back up! HAL mounts his jet ski again and speeds off as Mister Entertainment gets back up and now HE too abandons the ring and follows HAL on the jet ski!"
JULIUS: "Ha, that's what your lazy ass gets, ref!"
GHEORGHE: "These two refusing to stay in one place for too long in this match."
JULIUS: "The floating ring not much of a paradise for either of those two tonight, though. That might be why they're high-tailing it."
GHEORGHE: "I would assume they're coming back this way, to the ship, but who knows at this point!"
JIVE: "If they head to shore they'll be on their way to adding mainland CUBA to their list of 'places visited' during the match!"
GHEORGHE: "Thankfully they are heading back to the ship. I don't know if our camera crews could keep up otherwise. HAL is climbing that rope with an anchor at the bottom, ascending to the lower deck, and Mister Entertainment ... he follows along! HAL gets to the deck and sees the Champion ... and attempts to SHAKE Mister Entertainment off the rope! But Mister Entertainment continues on upward, and HAL abandons the cause, instead looking around for some weapon, perhaps."
JULIUS: "HAL unable to shut down the Champ."
JIVE: "He's going to find out the WHADAHTT way of finishing things!"
GHEORGHE: "As Jive continues to gratuitously kiss ass ..."
JIVE: "Hey!"
GHEORGHE: "... Mister Entertainment has come back up, and HAL comes at him with a tray pan! Mister Entertainment narrow dodging out of the way, and HAL hits the pan against the railing, STINGING his hands and dropping it!"
JULIUS: "Looks like they've taken things to the banquet hall scene."
GHEORGHE: "HAL driven back by more of those tae kwon do strikes and kicks of Mister Entertainment! He's just hammering away now, and HAL tries to cover up and think of a way out. HAL suddenly LUNGES at the Champion, trying for a bearhug ... Mister Entertainment fights it off with some palm strikes to the temples of HAL, and breaks free! Then HAL receives a QUICK and STIFF kick to the head, dazing him! Mister Entertainment looking around now as HAL staggers back ..."
(Mister Entertainment gets on top of the long buffet table, throwing food trays and pitchers at HAL, who covers up as he tries to shake off the pain. HAL approaches the table and Mister Entertainment runs and jumps onto the chandelier hanging above the table!)
GHEORGHE: "I don't know what Mister Entertainment is thinking here, but he is swinging on the chandelier and ... lands a kick to HAL on the return!"
JIVE: "If you can't touch him, you can't beat him! What a strategist!"
GHEORGHE: "Mister Entertainment knocks HAL down with another kick, but he's swinging further back and forth, and I don't know if that chandelier can handle much more!"
JULIUS: "He's stuck up with that problem!"
GHEORGHE: "That chandelier is going to come down ... but Mister Entertainment manages to swing his legs ON TOP?! HE'S SCALED IT in midair but the ceiling gives way and IT BREAKS!! MISTER ENTERTAINMENT RIDES THE CHANDELIER DOWN AND HAL IS CAUGHT UNDERNEATH!"
JULIUS: "GLASS SHARDS EVERYWHERE! Someone's going to need some stitches ..."
JIVE: "Probably HAL, under it all ..."
GHEORGHE: "I don't know if EITHER of these two are going to escape this match in too good of shape, although ... SOMEHOW ... it seems Mister Entertainment is stirring! He's busted open!"
JIVE: "If he can move, he can pin HAL!"
JULIUS: "At this point, that's probably all he can do."
GHEORGHE: "He has to FIND HAL first, in all that glass ... wait! HAL is stirring now and ... MY LORD! HIS FACE IS DRENCHED IN BLOOD! HAL IS LITERALLY A BLOODY MESS!"
JIVE: "He looks like someone attempted a blood transfusion on his face!"
GHEORGHE: "And Mister Entertainment ... NOT going for the pin? What is he thinking?!"
JULIUS: "He went off the end of the ship earlier. Maybe he's gone off the deep end in his head, too!"
GHEORGHE: "Mister Entertainment is heading towards a second table ... HE'S ON TOP OF THAT ONE! A referee has come onto the scene, but all he can do is count a pin or judge a submission attempt."
JULIUS: "He can't tell Mister Entertainment to get down, even though who knows if he's in his right mind. And HAL looks like ... well ... a guy who just got a chandelier dropped on him!"
GHEROGHE: "Mister Entertainment ... he points to HAL and ... MY LORD! SHOOTING ENTERTAINMENT ON HAL! HE JUST EXECUTED THAT PLUS 180 DEGREE SHOOTING STAR PRESS ONTO HAL AND THE REMAINS OF THE CHANDELIER! MY LORD!"
JULIUS: "That HAS to be it!"
JIVE: "They've been so busy killing each other, there haven't been many pinfalls. But okay, even I SAY that's enough."
GHEORGHE: "Mister Entertainment makes a cover!"
"ONE!"
"TWO!"
"THREE! IT'S OVER!"
(SFX: Bell rings.)
JACOBS: "The winner of this match ... and STIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLL New ERA of WRESTLING TELEVISION CHAMPION ..."
JIVE: "And WHADAHTT Champion!"
JACOBS: "MISTER …… ENTERTAINMENT!"
(CUEUP: "That's Entertainment" by The Jam.)
GHEORGHE: "And so after a wild, raucous ..."
JIVE: "Entertaining!"
GHEORGHE: "And yes, entertaining match ... Mister Entertainment retains his status as the WHADAHTT and ON TV Champion! And he did it on AND off the ship ... hitting some devastating moves on HAL tonight!"
JULIUS: "I have to say, even though HAL kept trying to fight back, and got a few good shots in .. Mister Entertainment was just ON tonight. There was NO stopping him."
JIVE: "Is there any dispute now? NOBODY is as great an ON TV Champion as Mister Entertainment! The undisputed BEST WHADAHTT ON TV Champion!"
GHEORGHE: "I would think these back-to-back wins, from WrestleSTOCK and now tonight, will have people on guard for this New ERA Champion, Mister Entertainment. But we're far from done yet, folks, as we turn the page and continue with more exciting action from New ERA’s BANNED in the US… and up next … we have the main event …. Three men… TWO World Heavyweight Champions … but tonight … only ONE will walk out the victor, and the SOLE World Heavyweight champion!"
