[ McMahon Stadium ] Calgary, Alberta
PRESENTS ....
TAPED: Jan. 15, 2005
AIRED: Jan. 21, 2005
EPISODE: RAUCOUS 18, Chapter 2
(FADEIN: Ringside. The fans are on their feet as RAUCOUS is about to start with its first match.)
GHEORGHE: “And we’re about to get things going here tonight as we have the first of two Double Debut matches. Deuce is set to take on Mr. Entertainment in just a few seconds.”
JIVE: “Mr. Entertainment talked repeatedly about giving the fans what they want and how he was going to use Deuce as the first step in showing the fans a true entertainer .. Deuce didn’t respond to his allegations, and I’m not sure if its because Deuce was enthralled by Mr. Entertainment’s words .. or if he was unimpressed.”
GHEORGHE: “Well we’re about to find out…”
(CUEUP: "The Imperial March" with the various Republican sound bites. The Phantom Republican appears from the back, drawing heavy boos from the Canadian crowd.)
GHEORGHE: “What is this?”
JIVE: “It looks like the Phantom Republican is coming out to welcome these Canadian fans to RAUCOUS!”
GHEORGHE: “Well, this crowd doesn't like Mr. Powell it seems.”
JIVE: “Of course they don't, liberal Canadians. They ought to show some respect. This man's a match away from becoming the number one contender to the New ERA World title.”
GHEORGHE: “Well, he has tough competition ahead of him if he wants that. Remember, Alister Hayze holds a victory over The Phantom Republican. These two will be facing off next show in the finals.”
(GOP hits the ring and takes the mic from the ring announcer.)
REPUBLICAN: “Well, I would demand that you people apologize for the way you've "welcomed" a foreign dignitary into your country...”
(SFX: Crowd boos.)
REPUBLICAN: “But then I realized that you people are all imbeciles incapable of understanding diplomacy anyway.”
(SFX: Immense heel heat.)
GHEORGHE: “Well, he sure knows how to ingratiate himself to a crowd.”
(The Phantom Republican stares into the crowd.)
REPUBLICAN: “Of course, as you people know, I was victorious in my first primary election towards the goal of the office of New ERA World Champion. Chaos, though a worthy foe, showed again he wasn't up to the task of challenging Jean Rabesque and ridding this company of that vile, un-American threat. Such a pity he was so hostile. Perhaps in a different time, he could have been my Secretary of Defense. But I feel I'm better off for having left him in the heap that I did.”
GHEORGHE: “Oh come on..”
REPUBLICAN: “Now, the prime objective, the last hurdle in this primary season, is Alister Hayze.”
(SFX: Crowd pops at the mention of Hayze.)
REPUBLICAN: “Oh, you people are rich. Of course, you Michael Moore-loving, maple syrup-slurping, moose-humping bunch of liberal lice would cheer a hippie degenerate like Hayze. And much like the hippie degenerate he is, he has shown utter contempt for the United States of America by aligning himself with Rabesque.”
JIVE: “Yea!! You teach them, GOP!”
REPUBLICAN: “Well, Mr. Hayze, I find your new alliance loathsome, an axis of evil so vile that it puts the current axis to utter shame. I see this as an attempt to get into bed with the Champion, so that if you somehow weasel your way by me again like you did the last time, his interests would be protected.”
GHEORGHE: “It seems that the Phantom Republican is still very aware of his loss later last year to Alister Hayze.”
REPUBLICAN: “Well, Mr. Hayze... I am hip to your little scam here, and I don't like it one bit. Clearly, this is an attempt to keep the Republican Party out of the power that it has been mandated to take. So, I will stand here and demand one of two things.”
GHEORGHE: “MANDATED? What is he talking about?!”
JIVE: “Quiet, Tom! You and your liberal pussies are so wrapped up in your biased media that you didn’t even notice that the Republican Party was given a heavy mandate to rid the United States of your kind!”
REPUBLICAN: “Either President LaRoque or Vice-President Marceau shall ban Jean Rabesque from appearing at ringside during our match to determine the Number One Contender to the New ERA World Heavyweight Championship, or I will be forced to take matters into my own hands.”
GHEORGHE: “What does he mean, into his own hands?”
REPUBLICAN: “If I have to dip into the party coffers and recruit some muscle to do that, I will. Because something tells me our brass, especially with last names such as LaRoque and Marceau, have it in their best interests to protect the vile French-Canadian Champion.”
(GOP, the Phantom Republican, flips the microphone over his shoulder as his theme music cues up. He leaves the ring to a chorus of jeers as some fans even toss trash at him.)
GHEORGHE: “My God! He just threw down an ultimatum! I don't think anyone's going to like that! Especially not Juliet Marceau!”
JIVE: “What has to be done has to be done, Tom! The Phantom Republican means business... and I like that!”
GHEORGHE: “The Phantom Republican now leaving the ringside area … and I guess we can get this match underway finally …”
JIVE: “The Phantom Republican gave these Canadian fans a piece of his mind … and Jean Rabesque and Alister Hayze better watch out, because he is going to plow right through Hayze and get the World title shot.”
GHEORGHE: “Let’s head down to ringside.”
(CUTTO: Carl Jacobs, who is standing in the middle of the ring, has the microphone that Phantom Republican tossed to the mat as the lineup comes on the screen.)
Double Debut
Mr. Entertainment vs. Deuce
JACOBS: “The following match is scheduled for one fall and has a thirty minute time limit … it is also a DOUBLE DEBUT MATCH!”
(SFX: Fans boo as ‘That’s Entertainment!’ by the Jam cues. A lone spotlight hits the curtain and Mr. Entertainment enters the arena. As he walks down to the ring he taunts the crowd causing further displeasure.)
JACOBS: “Introducing first …. Standing six foot two and weighing 234 pounds … he hails from Ashland, Oregon …… MISTER .. ENTERTAINMENT!”
(Mr. Entertainment enters the ring and climbs the turnbuckles as the spotlight continues to shine on him.)
JIVE: “Look at Mr. Entertainment! Now there’s a guy who knows how to work a crowd!”
GHEORGHE: “Well, gauging the fans’ response … that’s the EXACT feeling I got, Nick…”
JIVE: “If we listened to the fans, then Rabesque would be cham… oh wait…”
JACOBS: “And his opponent…”
(CUEUP: ‘I Stand Alone’ by Godsmack. The fans give a little pop as pyro shoots up from both sides of the rampway in a line. Deuce enters through the curtain followed by Serenity.)
JIVE: “Now THERE’s something to cheer for!”
JACOBS: “Being led to the ring by his manager SERENITY … he stands six foot two and weighs 235 pounds … hailing from Long Beach, California ….. DEUCE!”
(Deuce enters the ring and stands in the middle of the ropes … he extends his arms outwards and hangs his head. As he does so, more pyro shoots up from behind him. SFX: Bell rings.)
GHEORGHE: “And Deuce immediately making an impact on the crowd here..”
JIVE: “I’d say so .. Serenity is gorgeous!”
GHEORGHE: “I was talking about his ring entrance..”
JIVE: “Well on ring entrances alone, I give Mr. Entertainment the edge … what a classy entrance .. and it got the fans riled up!”
GHEORGHE: “Mr. Entertainment now turning to the fans and raising his hands in the air again … AND DEUCE ATTACKS HIM FROM BEHIND!”
JIVE: “ Deuce doesn’t want to waste any time.”
GHEORGHE: “ Deuce hitting some vicious forearms to the back of the head of Mr. Entertainment .. and now he takes him into the center of the ring … AND NAILS HIM WITH A SNAP SUPLEX! Deuce brings him back to his feet … AND HE NAILS ANOTHER! Deuce up one more time … AND HE TAKES OVER MR. ENTERTAINMENT WITH A THIRD SNAP SUPLEX!”
JIVE: “Those snap suplexes, while they don’t allow for blood to rush to the head in a stalling suplex, still do a lot of damage to the lower back.”
GHEORGHE: “ Deuce not letting up, Nick, as he locks on the side headlock …”
JIVE: “He’s riding a bit high on that headlock… if Mr. Entertainment catches that he could easily turn this move around.”
GHEORGHE: “ Deuce not giving him the chance as he floats to the back and grabs ahold of his arm … Deuce… DEUCE LOCKS THE HEAD AND HAS MR. ENTERTAINMENT ON THE MAT WITH A CROSS FACE CHICKENWING! Mr. Entertainment flailing in the ring trying to use some of his body’s momentum to flip Deuce off of him… but Deuce has him locked in tight!”
JIVE: “Never underestimate a man called Mr. Entertainment, Tom…”
GHEORGHE: “AND MR. ENTERTAINMENT ROLLS DEUCE OVER! And he has his shoulders down! ONE ……… TWO …….. KICKOUT! Mr. Entertainment almost got Deuce’s shoulders down for the three count!”
JIVE: “I told you, Tom .. Mr. Entertainment is out here to give the crowd a show .. and that starts by doing all these hoity toity moves..”
GHEORGHE: “Mr. Entertainment back to his feet now .. and he’s followed by Deuce who grabs him by the waist and runs him into the ropes … Deuce with the rollup … BUT MR. ENTERTAINMENT HOLDS ONTO THE ROPES! Deuce rolls over and flips back to his feet…. AND MR. ENTERTAINMENT CATCHES HIM SQUARE IN THE JAW WITH A SUPERKICK!”
JIVE: “And just like that the entire match can swing one way. Deuce caught a bad break and now he’s on the mat. Sometimes that’s just the way it goes.”
GHEORGHE: “Mr. Entertainment now dragging Deuce back to his feet … he locks the head … and takes him to the mat with a swinging neckbreaker!”
JIVE: “And Mr. Entertainment gets back to his feet and look at him working the crowd!”
(SFX: Crowd jeers.)
GHEORGHE: “They don’t seem too pleased with him so far, Nick.”
JIVE: “What are you talking about, Tom? They love him!”
GHEORGHE: “Mr. Entertainment beckoning Deuce to get back to his feet … and Deuce slowly gets to his knees… MR. ENTERTAINMENT COMES IN WITH A KNEE TO THE FACE OF DEUCE KNOCKING HIM BACK DOWN! Mr. Entertainment now down on the mat with Deuce … AND HE IS RUBBING DEUCE’s FACE RIGHT INTO THE RING APRON!”
JIVE: “Mr. Entertainment is showing Deuce that he doesn’t have the skill to be in the ring with him..”
GHEORGHE: “Mr. Entertainment now on his knees and he looks to the crowd again for approval … and still they’re booing him!”
JIVE: “They ARE Canadian…”
GHEORGHE: “I fail to see how that explains anything..”
JIVE: “They wouldn’t know a good thing if it hit them smack upside the head.”
GHEORGHE: “Mr. Entertainment now heading over to the turnbuckle … AND HE’s HEADING UP TOP!”
JIVE: “What better way to entertain the crowd than by going upstairs?”
GHEORGHE: “Mr. Entertainment is standing on top of the turnbuckles and he is waiting for Deuce to get up …. Deuce on his feet now .. and he doesn’t see Mr. Entertainment anywhere in the ring! Deuce turns … AND MR. ENTERTAINMENT FLIES OFF THE TOP ROPES AND CONNECTS WITH THE MISSILE DROPKICK! Mr. Entertainment with the cover …. ONE ……… TWO ………. THREE—NO!!! Deuce barely kicked out!”
JIVE: “Mr. Entertainment is wearing Deuce out .. if he keeps up this high powered offense, then Deuce will run out of stamina quickly.”
GHEORGHE: “ Deuce trying to get over to the corner now … and Mr. Entertainment is walking right over him! Mr. Entertainment is mocking Deuce!”
JIVE: “When you’re in his position, you do whatever you want!”
GHEORGHE: “ Deuce finally stops …. AND HE FLIPS OVER ON HIS BACK AND DRIVES A KNEE RIGHT UP INTO THE FAMILY JEWELS OF MR. ENTERTAINMENT! Mr. Entertainment beds over …. AND DEUCE CONNECTS WITH A FOREARM SHOT TO THE HEAD! Mr. Entertainment falls backwards and hits the mat!”
JIVE: “Although .. when you allow your opponent to gather his senses… I guess it gives him an awareness of where you might be. That didn’t work out the way Mr. Entertainment hoped it would .. and I know he’s got to be feeling more pain than any man ever wants to feel.”
GHEORGHE: “ Deuce gets to the corner and now leans into it… Deuce comes out of the corner … and he drops the elbow on Mr. Entertainment! Deuce now pointing to the corner … and I think he’s going to attempt a higher risk maneuver here!”
JIVE: “He needs to do something to jump start his offense..”
GHEORGHE: “ Deuce climbs up the ropes … and he stops at the second turnbuckle and sits on the top..”
JIVE: “Second rope leg drop coming here..”
GHEORGHE: “ Deuce raises his hands as he measures Mr. Entertainment… flies off …. AND HITS THE MAT AS MR. ENTERTAINMENT ROLLED OUT OF THE WAY!!”
JIVE: “ Deuce didn’t do enough to take Mr. Entertainment out.. a nutshot, while effective, lasts a few moments … and then you can expect your opponent to be doubly pissed when it does!”
GHEORGHE: “Mr. Entertainment knicks up .. and he’s pointing to his head!”
JIVE: “He’s smart, Tom .. Mr. Entertainment outwitted Deuce there.”
GHEORGHE: “Mr. Entertainment picks up Deuce off the mat … he heaves him over the shoulder … AND DROPS HIM WITH A SHOULDERBREAKER! The cover … ONE ……. TWO ……. THREE!”
JIVE: “ Deuce got the shoulder up!”
GHEORGHE: “The ref indicating that Deuce got his shoulder up … Mr. Entertainment now picking Deuce back u… NO! MR. ENTERTAINMENT NAILS THE IMPACT DDT AS SOON AS HE BROUGHT HIM TO HIS FEET! ONE ……….. TWO ……….. THREEEE--- NOOOOOO!! Deuce AGAIN kicking out!”
JIVE: “At least he seems to have some tenacity..”
GHEORGHE: “Mr. Entertainment shrugs his shoulders as the ref tells him it was only a two count … and he walks around the ring.. MR. ENTERTAINMENT IS NOW STANDING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RING WITH HIS HAND RESTING ON HIS CHIN!”
JIVE: “He’s pondering what to do next.. Something big .. something flashy .. something that’ll WOW the crowd.”
GHEORGHE: “ Deuce starting to move as he uses the ropes to get to his feet … Mr. Entertainment comes in … AND LOCKS ON AN ARMBAR!”
JIVE: “And what a FABULOUS arm bar it is!”
GHEORGHE: “Yea … it REALLY makes the crowd go WOW, Nick.”
JIVE: “So I was off.. shoot me.”
GHEORGHE: “That’s legal here.”
JIVE: “It wouldn’t surprise me, Tom.”
GHEORGHE: “Mr. Entertainment now with the arm of Deuce … wrings it around .. and has it tight behind his back … and now Mr. Entertainment uses some momentum .. and CATAPULTS DEUCE INTO THE CORNER! Deuce hits hard and stumbles backwards …. Mr. Entertainment against the ropes … AND HE CONNECTS WITH A FLYING CROSS BODY BLOCK! Mr. Entertainment now on top of Deuce and wailing away with lefts and rights! Mr. Entertainment now rolls off of Deuce and gets to his feet!”
JIVE: “I think this is it, Tom .. he’s nodding his head … it’s all over for Deuce!”
GHEORGHE: “Mr. Entertainment picks up Deuce … he throws him into the ropes … Deuce comes back … AND MR. ENTERTAINMENT PICKS HIM UP ……. AND STUN GUNS HIM INTO THE CORNER! Mr. Entertainment quickly on his feet ….. GRABS DEUCE BY THE WAIST ……………. THAT’s ENTERTAINMENT!!!!”
JIVE: “He rolled right into the german suplex with the bridge… Deuce is done.”
GHEORGHE: “ONE …………… TWO ………….. THREE!!!”
(SFX: Bell rings. CUEUP: ‘That’s Entertainment’ by the Jam as the crowd begins to jeer. Mr. Entertainment throws his hands up as the lights in the arena begin to flash as he exits the ring.)
GHEORGHE: “What an incredible performance by both men … but Mr. Entertainment came out of the match with the victory.”
JIVE: “ Deuce came out with Serenity, and immediately I thought he had a good chance … but Mr. Entertainment really delivered a fine performance here tonight … it should be interesting where he ends up here in New ERA..”
Time To Pay
(The crowd makes noise as a figure comes from the crowd and hops over the barrier.)
GHEORGHE: “What is going on here?!”
(The figure slides into the ring holding a steel chair in his hand and proceeds to wait for Deuce to get to his feet.)
GHEORGHE: “BY GOD THIS MAN IS GOING TO TAKE OFF OFF DEUCE’s HEAD!”
JIVE: “He’s gonna have a nice dent in his skull from this.”
(The figure comes into better view now and is wearing all black, including black boots, black gloves, sunglasses, a black tank top, and a black leather jacket. He throws down his glasses as Deuce turns around and faces him. Deuce’s eyes immediately widen..)
GHEORGHE: “ Deuce is now … Deuce is extending his arms and pleading with the man! DOES HE KNOW HIM?!”
JIVE: “I don’t know, Tom.”
GHEORGHE: “ Deuce now trying to walk towards this man … BUT HE EXTENDS THE CHAIR AND PUSHES DEUCE BACK!”
JIVE: “This doesn’t look too good for Deuce.. loses his debut match and now is standing face to face with this guy whose holding a steel chair.”
GHEORGHE: “This man … this man is pointing at Deuce … AND HE JUST GAVE HIM THE THUMBS DOWN!!! Deuce charges at him … AND THIS MAN CATCHES HIM BY THE THROAT AND THROWS HIM BACKWARDS!!”
JIVE: “He’s asking for the microphone… we’re finally going to find out who this is and why he’s here!”
MAN: “You screwed me over with The Boss. You asked for time, and I gave you’s time thinkin’ you wouldn’t fuck me like you fucked Tony. Deuce, you’s got a brain, why didn’t you use it? You knew I would find you. Taylor Mathis always finds his money, and I never fail The Boss. I want my money, and I want it … RIGHT … NOW...”
JIVE: “What the hell is he talking about?”
GHEORGHE: “I don’t know, Nick … but by God, someone take that chair away from him!”
JIVE: “Here he comes..”
GHEORGHE: “ Deuce is holding his neck as this man, Taylor Mathis I guess his name is, walks over to him .. and I think these two know each other!”
MATHIS: “You don’t have my money do you? I told you what would happen if I had to come back and you still didn’t have my money. I really regret this kid.. I actually went to bat for you and you fuck me over!? YOU KNOW HOW THAT MAKES ME LOOK, PUNK!? It makes me look like I’m not doin’ my job. Time to collect….”
GHEORGHE: “Wait a minute! He’s got brass knuckles! Mathis has brass knuckles!! AND HE IS ATTACKIGN DEUCE WITH THE BRASS KNUCKLES!! Mathis with a right fist … AND HE JUST BUSTED DEUCE OPEN!!”
JIVE: “He’s got the chair now!”
GHEORGHE: “AND TAYLOR MATHIS WALLOPS DEUCE OVER THE HEAD WITH THE STEEL CHAIR!”
JIVE: “He’s going to the outside!”
GHEORGHE: “BY GOD HE’s GETTING TABLES!”
JIVE: “And lead pipes!!!”
GHEORGHE: “SOMEONE GET SECURITY OUT HERE!! Deuce is spitting up blood in the ring … and he rolls to the outside … RIGHT AT THE FEET OF TAYLOR MATHIS!”
JIVE: “Out of all the places to land .. You’ve got to have shit on Jesus’ grave in a past life in order to have this much bad luck.”
GHEORGHE: “Mathis with some more shots to the ribs of Deuce with those knucks … and Deuce falls to the arena floor…. Now Mathis slides the table into the ring … and he rolls Deuce back into the ring! Thank God he leaves the lead pipes on the outside!”
JIVE: “Mathis just took of his jacket … AND LOOK AT THOSE GUNS! His arms are HUGE, Tom!”
GHEORGHE: “Mathis now sets the table up in the corner ……… he comes out …… AND HE IRISH WHIPS DEUCE INTO THE CORNER ………. AND DEUCE CRASHES THROUGH THE TABLE! OH MY GOD!”
MATHIS: “I’m gonna give you two fuckin’ choices right now, Goth Boy! You either tell me where I can get my money or I END YOUR FUCKING CAREER RIGHT NOW! This is personal right now, because you are fucking with my paycheck!”
JIVE: “Remind me never, EVER, to borrow money from this guy.”
GHEORGHE: “Mathis watches now as Deuce is trying to crawl out of the ring … Deuce is busted open and the ring apron … is just plastered with his blood… and Taylor Mathis is SMILING IN THE RING..”
JIVE: “He loves his job… more than I can say for me.”
GHEORGHE: “Mathis now has that steel chair …… AND HE IS PLACING THE LEFT LEG OF DEUCE IN BETWEEN THE CHAIR ……… he bounces off the ropes … AND DOUBLE STOMPS THE CHAIR!! BY GOD DEUCE IS SCREAMING HIS HEAD OFF!”
JIVE: “And here comes security!”
(SFX: Crowd pops as security comes running down the rampway.)
GHEORGHE: “It’s too late! Deuce is already out of it … Mathis now taking the OTHER leg of Deuce … and HE SETS IT UP IN THE CHAIR! Security gets to the ring … RIGHT AS HE STOMPS THE OTHER LEG OF DEUCE!!”
JIVE: “This man could cause a lot of people problems should he be convinced to work for someone here..”
GHEORGHE: “Security in the ring … BUT TAYLOR MATHIS …. HE PICKS UP DEUCE AND IS BENCH PRESSING HIM ………………..”
(SFX: Crowd pops huge.)
GHEORGHE: “OH HOLY HELL!!! MATHIS JUST GORILLA PRESSED DEUCE OUT OF THE RING AND THROUGH THE TABLE THAT WAS SET UP ON THE OUTSIDE!!!!!”
MATHIS: “Taylor Mathis is here for a REASON! I AM A DEBT COLLECTOR! And you all with pay your debts one way or another. THIS IS A START BOYS!!! TAKE A LOOK, BECAUSE ANYONE BACK THERE CAN BE NEXT!!”
(Mathis puts the microphone in his back pocket as security is trying to get handcuffs on him and escort him out of the building…)
GHEORGHE: “I … I don’t know what to say ladies and gentleman.. Deuce is not moving … and here come the EMT’s…”
JIVE: “This might just be his DEBUT and FAREWELL match, Tom..”
GHEORGHE: “This Tony Mathis character … with a warning to others in the lockerroom … we need to take a commercial break. I just don’t know what to say right now.”
( continued... )
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