JACOBS: “The following match is a special non-title FLAGPOLE match! In order to win you must ascend the ladder … retrieve your country’s flag … and bring it to the mat! Introducing first….”
(CUEUP: ‘Shapes of Things’ by the Jeff Healy Band. The crowd explodes as Jean Rabesque steps through the curtain with the World title on his shoulder.)
JACOBS: “He stands six foot one and weighs 245 pounds … he hails from Montreal, Quebec, Canada and is the CURRENT New ERA of Wrestling WORRRRRRRRLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION ……………. JEAN RABESQUE!!!”
GHEORGHE: “The World Champion looks ready to right the result of last RAUCOUS’ tag team match where he and Alister Hayze were defeated by DREDD in the double dog collar falls count anywhere match.”
JIVE: “If anything he’s going to fall flat on his face… This is going to be Rabesque’s personal Battle of Quebec … and he’s going to be overrun by the DREDD army!”
JACOBS: “And his opponent…”
(CUEUP: ‘The Touch’ by Stan Bush. The fans in the arena immediately begin to jeer as Jonathan Marx walks down the isle. As he gets to the bottom, Brandon Jacobs comes out.)
JACOBS: “He stands six foot two and weighs 215 pounds … hailing from Princeton, New Jersey and a member of DREDD ………. ‘Gentleman’ JONATHAN MARX!!!”
(SFX: Bell rings.)
GHEORGHE: “Brandon Jacobs coming down the isle now … and here come John Doe and Carlee Marx! Doe looks freshly showered as well!”
JIVE: “I would hope so! He needs to be quarantined after what Chaos did to him!”
(As Jacobs, Marx, and Doe meet up a man hops over the barrier.)
GHEORGHE: “THERE’s ALISTER HAYZE!!! HAYZE HAS A STEEL CHAIN WRAPPED AROUND HIS HAND AND HE IS WARNING DREDD ABOUT COMING TO THE RING!”
JIVE: “This is a three on one situation, Tom…”
(SFX: Huge pop! Jason Payne and Chaos walk from behind the curtain and tap Jacobs and Doe on the shoulder…. They turn and immediately all hell breaks loose!)
GHEORHGE: “OH MY GOD!! HAYZE, PAYNE and CHAOS ARE FIGHTING DOE AND JACOBS!! And here comes security to break things up!”
JIVE: “But it has distracted Jonathan Marx!”
GHEORGHE: “Marx with his back to Rabesque … AND RABESQUE WASTES NO TIME IN CLIPPING THE KNEE OF JONATHAN MARX!”
JIVE: “What a cheap shot!”
GHEORGHE: “Rabesque grabs Marx by the leg and drags him to the center of the ring … and now he’s driving Marx’s knee into the mat! It looks like security has gotten everything under control and all six have been sent to the back.”
JIVE: “How dare Alister Hayze ruin Jonathan’s support group! Jean Rabesque has the support of all these fans, and Marx has no one!”
GHEORGHE: “Jonathan Marx is going to need the support of a cane if Rabesque keeps drilling that knee! Jean Rabesque now drops the elbow and he is pulling the leg back trying to hyperextend the knee of Jonathan Marx!”
JIVE: “The referee should step in and let Jonathan catch his breath! Rabesque attacked him from behind and didn’t even give him a chance to sort his thoughts!”
GHEORGHE: “It’s too late now, Nick! Jean Rabesque still bending the leg back of Marx … BUT MARX GRABS A HOLD OF HIS FACE! Jonathan Marx trying to break free of the hold and he is holding onto the head of Rabesque … but Rabesque yanks the knee again and Marx is forced to let go! Jonathan Marx already in a predicament here and the World Champion is wisely going after the legs.”
JIVE: “Rabesque comes from a family of inbred dogs … I don’t think anything he does could be considered wise.”
GHEORGHE: “Rabesque releases the leg of Marx and brings him to his feet … Rabesque takes a hold of Marx’s leg and now Marx is hopping on one foot… MARX WITH AN ENZIGUIRI …. BUT RABESQUE DUCKS! Jonathan Marx now on his stomach … AND JEAN RABESQUE LOCKS ON A SINGLE-LEG BOSTON CRAB!”
JIVE: “Marx was trying to change the momentum of the match, but Rabesque knew what was coming. Now Jonathan’s in even worse trouble!”
GHEORGHE: “Rabesque is trying to add as much pressure on the lower back as he can … and Jonathan Marx is not looking too hot to start things off.”
JIVE: “Just wait, Tom … Jonathan Marx is the best technician in the game … he’ll find some way to outsmart Jean Rabesque.. not that it’s too hard already.”
GHEORGHE: “I would venture to say that Jean Rabesque is the most gifted technical wrestler in the sport today, and until he retires, or someone consistently beats him, he’ll continue to hold that title, along with the New ERA World title. Rabesque releases the single-leg crab and now he slides to the outside…”
JIVE: “Rabesque is going for the ladder already … he wants to get out of this match as quickly as possible because he knows that Jonathan Marx is going to school him once he regains his composure!”
GHEORGHE: “Rabesque voiced his concerns about having two very talented technical wrestlers in a match like this, but as we have seen so far, it doesn’t just have to be about the ladder.”
JIVE: “Which explains oh so well why he’s in such a rush to get it.”
GHEORGHE: “Rabesque slides in with the ladder… Jonathan Marx now is getting to his feet and he’s trying to shake off the effects of the early leg work by Rabesque. The World Champion sees Marx on his feet … AND HE TOSSES THE LADDER AT MARX ….. AND MARX MOVES!”
JIVE: “His leg’s injured, not his reflexes, you idiot!”
GHEORGHE: “AND JONATHAN MARX CHARGES AT JEAN RABESQUE AND HE DROPKICKS HIM INTO THE CORNER! Marx back up, still favoring his leg …. AND HE BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEXES HIM OUT OF THE CORNER! Jean Rabesque quickly up to his feet again …. And Marx takes him down with a drop toe hold! Jonathan Marx floats over the back of Rabesque and he locks on the headlock!”
JIVE: “Look at Marx! He’s already showing Rabesque that he’s the better wrestler!”
GHEORGHE: “Rabesque quickly gets out of the headlock and he pulls the arm of Marx behind his back! And now Marx grabs the head of Jean Rabesque and flips him over! Marx drives the knee into the back of the neck of Rabesque and he applies a chinlock on the World Champion!”
JIVE: “Rabesque thought he was being smart by getting out of the headlock, but Jonathan Marx is 5 steps ahead … he knows what he’s going to be doing in five minutes before Jean Rabesque can even think of what he’s doing next!”
GHEORGHE: “Marx brings Rabesque to his feet … he sends him into the ropes with an irish whip … Rabesque on the rebound … and he hops over the back of the bent over Marx! Marx stands up and turns as Rabesque bounces off the other ropes … Marx once again bends down … AND RABESQUE GRABS HIM BY THE HEAD AND PILEDRIVES HIM TO THE MAT!”
JIVE: “Come on Jonathan! Start showing Rabesque who his daddy is!”
GHEORGHE: “Well, according to Marx, Rabesque is El Arco Iris’ daddy.”
JIVE: “Which wouldn’t surprise me considering how fruity they both are.”
GHEORGHE: “Jean Rabesque back to his feet and he looks at Marx … AND NOW RABESQUE IS BRINGING THE LADDER UP! Rabesque is setting up the ladder!”
JIVE: “Oh God… hurry up! He’s got the ladder stabilized!”
GHEORGHE: “Rabesque clicks the last piece in place … but Jonathan Marx is getting to his feet! Jean Rabesque walks over to Marx … AND MARX WITH A KICK TO THE GUT! Jonathan Marx grabs the head of Jean Rabesque and he smashes it into the turnbuckle! AND AGAIN!”
CROWD: “THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE! TEN!”
GHEORGHE: “AND RABESQUE STUMBLES OUT OF THE CORNER AND FALLS FLAT ON HIS FACE!”
JIVE: “Marx is heading to the ladder!”
GHEORGHE: “Jonathan Marx gets to the ladder and he starts climbing up the rungs!”
JIVE: “Come on, Jonathan! Just a few more steps!”
GHEORGHE: “Jean Rabesque looks up and sees this … AND RABESQUE IS ON HIS FEET AND HE GRABS ONTO THE BACK OF MARX’S TIGHTS! Jonathan Marx is trying to kick at Rabesque … BUT RABESQUE GRABS ONTO HIS FOOT!! Jean Rabesque yanks on the leg of Jonathan Marx AND MARX AND THE LADDER FALL ON TOP OF THE WORLD CHAMPION!”
JIVE: “Bright move … let’s pull Jonathan Marx my way … while he’s holding on to the ladder!”
GHEORGHE: “The ladder is on top of both men as they both start to get to their feet … Jonathan Marx is on his feet first and he kicks Rabesque in the … NO! Rabesque grabs his leg! Rabesque with a single leg take down … and he has on the ankle lock!”
JIVE: “Doesn’t he know at this point its better to throw Marx out of the ring?!”
GHEORGHE: “Jean Rabesque has the ankle lock on and Jonathan Marx is trying to get to the ropes!”
JIVE: “It doesn’t matter if it gets the ropes or not!”
GHEORGHE: “Jonathan Marx grabs on to the ropes … BUT RABESQUE KEEPS THE HOLD LOCKED ON TIGHT!”
JIVE: “He’s using the ropes to climb up!”
GHEORGHE: “Jonathan Marx clutches the second ropes as he pulls himself closer… and now he is almost standing! Jean Rabesque lets go of the ankle lock …. AND CLOTHESLINES JONATHAN MARX OVER THE TOP ROPE!”
JIVE: “NO!!!”
GHEORGHE: “Jean Rabesque has the ladder upright! Jean Rabesque is trying to position the ladder underneath the flags …. BUT HERE COMES JONATHAN MARX! Marx slides back into the ring AND HE CLOTHESLINES RABESQUE INTO THE LADDER! Jonathan Marx now picks up Jean Rabesque …. And he nails him with some knife edge chops!”
CROWD: “WHOOOOO! WHOOOOOOOOO! WHOOOOOOOOOO!”
GHEORGHE: “Marx sends Rabesque into the ropes …….. he catches him on the rebound …. Picks him up, turns …. AND HE HITS A SPINEBUSTER RIGHT ON TOP OF THE FALLEN LADDER! Jean Rabesque is holding his back in an immense amount of pain as he rolls off the ladder!”
JIVE: “Now is your chance, Jonathan! Go for the gold!”
GHEORGHE: “Well, the flag in this case.”
JIVE: “Who cares!”
GHEORGHE: “Jonathan Marx sets up the ladder …. Marx climbs up the ladder …. WAIT! He turns…”
JIVE: “NO KEEP GOING UP TOP!”
GHEORGHE: “MARX FLIES OFF WITH A ELBOW SMASH …….. AND HE PLANTS IT RIGHT IN THE CHEST OF THE WORLD CHAMPION!”
JIVE: “Thank the Lord Almighty!”
GHEORGHE: “Jonathan Marx rolls off of Jean Rabesque … and both men are on the mat as that seemed to have taken something out of Marx as well.”
JIVE: “He just flew off a 12 foot ladder, Tom….”
GHEORGHE: “Jonathan Marx starting to stir as he inches towards the ladder…”
JIVE: “Oh no.. I think that elbow drop has re-awakened Rabesque! He’s moving too!”
GHEORGHE: “Marx gets to the ladder and he starts to grip onto it … and now Rabesque is on his feet!! Jonathan Marx and Jean Rabesque meet each other … and they’re exchanging blows right next to the ladder! Jean Rabesque gets the upperhand …. AND HE KICKS AT THE LEG HE WORKED OVER EARLIER!”
JIVE: “Leave it to Rabesque to resort to cheap tactics! How can this man lead our company when he is a blatant fraud!”
GHEORGHE: “Rabesque now grabs the leg of Marx … and he whips him to the mat! Jean Rabesque now viciously stomping on the knee of Jonathan Marx … and now he drops the elbow on it! Jonathan Marx desperately trying to get away from the World Champion and he’s crawling to the ropes!”
JIVE: “Marx isn’t DESPERATELY trying to get to the ropes … but he knows that it would help him get to his feet if he could use them.”
GHEORGHE: “Rabesque grabs both feet of Marx … and he turns him over onto his back …. AND NOW RABESQUE SLINGSHOTS HIM INTO THE CORNER!! Jonathan Marx hits the turnbuckle pad face first and now Rabesque heads over to him… Rabesque grabs his head … AND HE SLAMS IT INTO THE TURNBUCKLE PAD! AND AGAIN!”
JIVE: “Rabesque is not only a fraud, but a copycat!”
GHEORGHE: “What goes around, comes around, Nick! And the crowd counting along with Rabesque”
CROWD: “FIVE! SIX! SEVEN! EIGHT! NINE! TEN!”
GHEORGHE: “Jean Rabesque grabs Marx by the head … and he sends him into the ropes with an irish whip! Marx on the rebound … and he hops over Rabesque who drops to the mat! Marx off the opposite ropes … and now Rabesque leap frogs over him! Marx off the ropes …. Rabesque turns …….. AND THEY COLLIDE IN THE CENTER OF THE RING IN FRONT OF THE LADDER!”
JIVE: “And both men go down!”
GHEORGHE: “Both men at the feet of the ladder … AND JEAN RABESQUE IS THE FIRST TO MAKE A MOTION TO THE LADDER!”
JIVE: “Come on, Jonathan! Don’t let him get that ugly pinecone flag!”
GHEORGHE: “You mean, maple leaf, Nick… You’re in their country, you should at least know what is on their flag.”
JIVE: “If it’s not the hammer and the sickle, then they obviously don’t know what should be on their flag!”
GHEORGHE: “AND NOW JONATHAN MARX MAKES A MOTION FOR THE LADDER! Both men are at the bottom rung of the ladder! Rabesque is starting to climb the ladder!”
JIVE: “COME ON JONATHAN! PUT YOUR BACK INTO IT!”
GHEORGHE: “Marx quickly follows Rabesque up … AND NOW THEY ARE EXCHANGING BLOWS ACROSS THE LADDER! Rabesque climbing closer to the flag … AND SO IS MARX! Marx and Rabesque only a few inches away from their respective flags!”
JIVE: “But wait! Rabesque is on the side of the American Flag, and Marx is on the side of the Communist Flag!”
GHEORGHE: “CANADIAN!”
JIVE: “That’s what I said.”
GHEORGHE: “Rabesque now … RABESQUE WITH A LEFT HOOK TO THE SIDE OF THE FACE …. AND MARX IS REELING!”
(SFX: Crowd begins to jeer massively.)
GHEORGHE: “WHAT IS HE DOING DOWN HERE!! SOMEONE GET HIM OUT OF HERE!”
JIVE: “JOHN DOE IS HERE TO SAVE THE DAY!”
GHEORGHE: “GOD NO! JOHN DOE GRABS A CHAIR FROM A FAN AND HE SLIDES INTO THE RING!”
(SFX: CRACK! Followed by even LOUDER jeers!)
JIVE: “IT’s OUTTA HERE!”
GHEORGHE: “AND JOHN DOE CRACKS THE CHAIR AGAINST THE BACK OF THE WORLD CHAMPION ……………………………… AND RABESQUE FALLS OFF THE LADDER!!! JOHN DOE IS REPEATEDLY NAILING THE WORLD CHAMPION WITH THE CHAIR ……”
JIVE: “Marx has turned the ring around so that he has the American flag!”
GHEORGHE: “DOE NOW CHOKING THE WORLD CHAMPION ………… AND JONATHAN MARX HAS THE FLAG!!! MARX CLIMBS DOWN THE LADDER ………… BY GOD DREDD HAS ONCE AGAIN SCREWED OVER JEAN RABESQUE!”
(SFX: Bell rings as Marx waves the flag around!)
JACOBS: “The winner of this match ……. ‘Gentleman’ JONATHAN MARX!”
JIVE: “YES! DREDD WINS!”
GHEORGHE: “JONATHAN MARX AND JOHN DOE STOLE THIS MATCH!”
(SFX: Crowd pops HUGE.)
GHEORGHE: “AND HERE COMES ALISTER HAYZE!!! HAYZE RUNS INTO THE RING …….. AND HE CLOBBERS JOHN DOE! HAYZE GRABS THE AMERICAN FLAG FROM MARX …….. AND HE JAMS HIM IN THE STOMACH WITH IT!”
(SFX: SNAP!)
GHEORGHE: “AND HAYZE BREAKS THE FLAG POLE OVER THE BACK OF JONATHAN MARX!”
JIVE: “TRAITOR!”
GHEORGHE: “Rabesque is now on his feet … AND HE HAS JOHN DOE! Security is now bombarding the ring in an effort to break these four men apart!!!”
JIVE: “Alister Hayze ruined a perfectly wonderful match!”
GHEORGHE: “No JOHN DOE DID!”
