[ Jon M. Huntsman Center ] Salt Lake City, Utah
PRESENTS ....
TAPED: Apr. 04, 2010
AIRED: Apr. 15, 2010
EPISODE: RAUCOUS 36
(FADEIN: The final moments of Destrucity II. The scene focuses on the World Heavyweight championship belt as it comes crashing down across the face of Shawn Hart.)
GHEORGHE: “WILLARD WITH REPEATED SHOTS TO THE FACE WITH THE BELT … HART IS BUSTED OPEN!”
(The shot fast forwards.)
WILLARD: “I brought you a Prophecy, I told you what I have foreseen.. this very event, at this very time. I warned you Hart….”
(The scene fast forwards again. This time with Shawn Hart, bloodied, holding the World Heavyweight championship high above his head.)
WILLARD (V/O): “It’s been envisioned.”
(The camera fades out. Seconds later, it fades back in. The CAREER vs CAREER match between Stalker and Rocko Daymon from EPW & New ERA present .. Sin City Showdown.)
MATTHEWS: “Stalker is UP... but STILL no signs of life out of Rocko Daymon!”
THOMAS: “This COULD BE IT!!”
NEELY: “For his sake, he better HOPE that's it!”
...
*SEVEN!!!*
...
NEELY: “...is he DEAD?!”
MATTHEWS: “NO, he's still breathing... but with only three moments away, there's NO WAY he can make it back now!”
THOMAS: “Come on, Rocko!”
...
*EIGHT!!!*
...
THOMAS: “DAYMON'S EYES SNAP OPEN!! He's AWAKE!!”
MATTHEWS: “Daymon trying to ROLL OVER and PUSH HIMSELF UP...”
...
*NINE!!!*
...
THOMAS: “...OH NO, HIS RIGHT ARM JUST GAVE OUT!!!”
NEELY: “GAME OVER, BUDDY!!!”
*TEN!!!*
(SFX: *DING! DING! DING!!*)
MATTHEWS: “IT'S OVER!!”
(CUEUP: “Did My Time.” Victorious, Stalker falls into the ropes with his arms thrown into the air! Daymon lies stunned on the mat, looking lost and absolutely shocked without words. The camera pauses on Daymon’s face before fading out.)
STALKER (V/O): “TONIGHT... I did the very thing I promised I would do! I ENDED ROCKO DAYMON'S CAREER!!”
(The camera cuts in one final time to the main event of Sin City Showdown. EPW World Heavyweight champion “Triple X” Sean Stevens having just been eliminated by New ERA World Heavyweight champion Shawn Hart in the War Games match.)
THOMAS: “Are you KIDDING ME?! Shawn Hart, down 3 to 1… Has pinned Layne Winters, and now he’s pinned the EPW World Heavyweight Champion!”
MATTHEWS: “Shawn Hart has somehow brought this match down to a one on one contest I’d never believed it possible if I didn’t see it with my own two eyes!”
THOMAS: “The Phenom has already pulled off the improbable just getting this to a one on one match, can he pull off the impossible and win this match for New ERA…”
NEELY: “How… HOW did that happen?! Sean Stevens hasn’t been pinned in over a year… That NEVER happens… That COULDN’T happen!”
(The camera fast forwards to the end of the match.)
THOMAS: “First gets up and Hart plows through him with a CLOTHESLINE… Hart off the ropes… ANOTHER CLOTHESLINE!! First gets up and gets caught ONE MORE TIME!!!... SJH gives a shout to the crowd and now it’s time for one final Hart-On, one final move to complete this storybook comeback… Can he get it?! First to his feet… HART WITH THE HART-ON! NO FIRST SHOVES HIM OFF… FIRST WITH A SOULBREAKER! NO! HART HELD THE TOP ROPE… FIRST CRASHES TO THE MAT!!”
NEELY: “Can he do nothing right?!”
THOMAS: “Hart waits on First… First to his feet… HART ON!! NO!! FIRST DUCKED OUT OF IT… Hart got some BIG air there and CRASHED to the mat! He may have hit the back of his head on the canvas… The Phenom trying to get to his feet… He’s on one knee… FIRST CHARGES OFF THE ROPES… SHINING WIZARD!!! HE NAILED HART RIGHT IN THE SIDE OF THE HEAD!! Hart down in the center of the ring, The First going to the outside… He’s up to the top rope… CUT THE THREAD… YES!! HE HIT IT!! FIRST WITH THE COVER!! LEG IS HOOKED!!
ONE!!!
TWO!!!
THREE!!!!”
(SFX: Bell rings. CUEUP: “Happy Birthday” by The Birthday Massacre as the crowd orgasms.)
FATORA: “THE WINNER OF THIS CONTEST… AND SOLE SURVIVOR… FROM EMPIRE PRO WRESTLING… THE FIRST!!!!”
(Blackness as “the First!!” echoes repeatedly.)
VOICE: “The battle is over..”
(The camera cuts to the Jon M. Huntsman Center. The fans jam packed as “New ERA RAUCOUS” banners hang from the rafters.)
VOICE: “But the war … has just begun.”
(CUEUP: “Who Said” by Planet Funk as the RAUCOUS logo comes on screen.)
(CUTTO: Tom Gheorghe and Nick Jive sitting behind the announce table.)
GHEORGHE: “What a night we had on February 10th.. and what a battle that War Games match was!”
JIVE: “Shawn Hart did his best coming back from a 3-1 disadvantage .. but in the end Empire Pro snuck out the victory.”
GHEORGHE: “And welcome everyone to the Jon M. Huntsman Center here at the University of Utah in Salt Lake City for New ERA RAUCOUS!”
JIVE: “The first official RAUCOUS since we’ve come back, Gheorghe!”
GHEORGHE: “Destrucity II kicked off New ERA’s return after the demise of the WFW:NE, and you’re right, Nick, tonight is the first New ERA RAUCOUS in … wow .. almost three years!”
JIVE: “Has it really been that long?!”
GHEORGHE: “May 4th 2007 was our last RAUCOUS under the New ERA banner … which happened right before BANNED in the US .. and we all know the story there!”
JIVE: “Well, shit, I’ll drink to this occasion then!”
GHEORGHE: “You were going to drink no matter what, Nick, who are you kidding?”
JIVE: “Mmmm.. you’re right.”
GHEORGHE: “We have a boatload of action tonight here in Salt Lake City.. but first.. how about Destrucity II and Sin City Showdown? The MGM Grand Garden Arena was the hottest spot on the strip.”
JIVE: “Talk about a jam-packed day. Empire Pro had Aggression 50 … then we had Destrucity II .. and finally the Sin City Showdown .. Cameron Cruise wrestled in three matches in one day.. Shawn Hart .. three matches in one day. They’re beasts!”
GHEORGHE: “Cameron Cruise unfortunately coming out empty handed ..”
JIVE: “He and Problem Child lost the World Tag Team Championships to .. JACK n’ HOFF!”
GHEORGHE: “Problem Child left Cruise high and dry when he needed him most! That’s not fair.”
JIVE: “THEN .. then Cruise flopped around like a dead fish while Erik Black took him to town!”
GHEORGHE: “Erik Black is an amazing competitor .. Cruise fought til the very end, but unfortunately, couldn’t hold onto the belt.”
JIVE: “And finally, he goes and embarrasses New ERA by getting eliminated in the War Games match by Jared Wells!”
GHEORGHE: “Cut him some slack, Nick! That was his third match of the night!”
JIVE: “Well tonight he’s going to continue his epic streak when he takes on “the Prophecy” Adrian Willard!”
GHEORGHE: “Willard .. and his manager … Freak .. made quite the splash during the main event of New ERA Destrucity II .. they cost Peter File his chance at becoming the World Heavyweight champion!”
JIVE: “Shawn Hart got his ass handed to him sideways .. and he still managed to make it to the very end of the War Games match.”
GHEORGHE: “Willard attacking Hart during the World Heavyweight championship match … and tonight he will take on Cameron Cruise .. the only man in New ERA history to have held two championship belts at once.”
JIVE: “And to lose those two championships on the same night!”
GHEORGHE: “Well obviously.. if he’s the only person to have held two belts at once.”
JIVE: “Boo-hoo.”
GHEORGHE: “New ERA is in mourning today.. former World Heavyweight champion Rocko Daymon losing a career versus career match against Stalker from Empire Pro ..”
JIVE: “Daymon walked out with his head high, though… right after he demolished Stalker after the match was over.”
GHEORGHE: “Still it is a humongous blow … we lost a very, very talented wrestler who would have, without a doubt, held the World Heavyweight championship once more.”
JIVE: “He can always come back under a mask… because that’s not predictable!”
GHEORGHE: “Speaking of people who aren’t coming back … what a hellacious battle for the PRODIGY© Classic Xtreme championship in that Single Night Tournament!”
JIVE: “The fact that John Doe is sitting in some loony bin right now … well… that just warms me up inside.”
GHEORGHE: “That or the vodka.”
JIVE: “Oh.. yea.. I didn’t think of that.”
GHEORGHE: “Three matches … three P©X matches… and congratulations to Chaos for becoming a FOUR.. yes, that’s what I said, FOUR time PRODIGY© Classic Xtreme champion!”
JIVE: “Like there was any doubt!”
GHEORGHE: “Chaos defeating Doe in the Flaming Tables match in the first round … the match that sent Doe …”
JIVE: “Packing. Thank you, Chaos.”
GHEORGHE: “Right. Ashe Corvin defeated Trevor Cane in a … Tsunami match .. and those two men battled it out in … a HELLRAISER match!”
JIVE: “Ashe Corvin took everything Chaos had … but the big man … you can’t keep him from the P©X championship … that belt was made for guys like Chaos.”
GHEORGHE: “Corvin was supposed to be in action tonight, taking on Mr. Entertainment, but alas, unable to make it.. so Mr. Entertainment will be taking on “Total Carnage” Trevor Cane.”
JIVE: “Entertainment looking to get back on track after losing the #1 contender’s match for the Television championship to .. get this .. Jeff “Greenhorn” Jorgenson!”
GHEORGHE: “Jorgenson pulling out a second consecutive victory over the self-proclaimed most entertaining man in New ERA history… and tonight Jorgenson will have his chance to walk away with the belt as he takes on “the Druid.”
JIVE: “No chance in hell for the rookie … Erik Black has more talent in his bloodshot eyes than Jorgenson has in his entire body.”
GHEORGHE: “Oh stop!”
JIVE: “I’m serious! Erik Black smokes bongs bigger than Jeff Jorgenson!”
GHEORGHE: “Ladies and gentlemen.. tonight’s main event … a huge six man tag team match .. Peter File and the World Tag Team Champions will take on the recently reformed Dogs of War … and the World Heavyweight champion Shawn Hart!”
JIVE: “Jason Payne and Chris McMillan shocked the world at Destrucity II … they fought tooth and nail… brawling to a double count out … and it was just a show!”
GHEORGHE: “The Dogs of War coming down and cleaning house after Jack n’ Hoff won the World Tag Team Championships … they sent Problem Child running for the hills and you can bet that tonight … they’ll be looking to make a statement in the match with Jack n’ Hoff.”
JIVE: “Peter File will have a chance to get his hands on the bod.. er I won’t go there… but he has another shot at Shawn Hart … even if the belt is not on the line.”
GHEORGHE: “The World Heavyweight champion and his challenger from Destrucity II will face off once more .. and perhaps this time … things will be settled.”
JIVE: “Something tells me the answer to that will be no.”
GHEORGHE: “But up first.. we have the debut of three .. yes .. three new superstars!”
JIVE: “Can you feel the excitement?”
GHEORGHE: “Are you being sarcastic?”
JIVE: “Yes.”
GHEORGHE: “Y2RR, Bobby Crane .. and Jack Vonnegut .. the newcomer triple threat… when we return!”
COMMERCIAL BREAK
GHEORGHE: “Welcome back to the beautiful Jon M. Huntsman Center here at the University of Utah .. and we are just moments away from the debut of three new members of the New ERA roster!”
JIVE: “Y2RR was scheduled to make his debut at Sin City Showdown, but due to some travel difficulties, he was unable to make it…”
GHEORGHE: “This will be “Beautiful” Bobby Crane’s official debut in New ERA even though he representing the league at On Hallowed Ground, the CWC versus Knights intershow. He didn’t have a successful night there, so one has to assume that he’ll want to make a big splash tonight.”
JIVE: “I don’t know much about Vonnegut, do you?”
GHEORGHE: “Not one bit, but we’re going to right now!”
(The camera cuts to the ring as the lineup flashes on screen.)
Newcomer Triple Threat
Y2RR vs. Bobby Crane vs. Jack Vonnegut
LINKS: “The following match is scheduled for one fall … and is a triple threat! Introducing first…”
(CUEUP: “Unbelievable” by EMF. Bobby Crane steps into a spotlight, the sparkles on his deep red robe glimmering; he then looks at the crowd in disgust, mocking fans as he walks down the aisle. He climbs up the ring steps, wipes his feet on the apron, and steps through the ropes. Standing in the middle of the ring, he teases the crowd, pretending to take off his robe and then deeming them not worthy. He does this several times, and then finally removes it. The fans, however, seem uninterested.)
LINKS: “Hailing from Hollywood, California… standing six foot two and weighing in at 245 pounds …. “BEAUTIFUL” … BOBBY … CRANE!”
GHEORGHE: “Crane showing complete contempt for the fans here in the arena …”
JIVE: “Why should he show them anything more?”
GHEORGHE: “Because they pay his salary?”
JIVE: “Likely story, Gheorghe.”
(CUEUP: “School” by Nirvana. Jack Vonnegut appears. He subtly shrugs his shoulders, briefcase in hand, and begins to walk down the ramp, ignoring the fans around him. He slides underneath the bottom rope and into the ring, and places his briefcase by the turnbuckle as he looks at Crane.)
LINKS: “Hailing from Mount Pearl, Newfoundland… he stands five foot ten inches … and weighs 210 pounds …. JACK …. VONNEGUT!”
JIVE: “Newfoundland? Have we sunk that low?”
GHEORGHE: “It’s a beautiful place, Nick.”
JIVE: “Vonnegut trained to be a professional wrestler by fucking sheep… this should be interesting.”
GHEORGHE: “NICK!”
LINKS: “And finally…”
(CUEUP: “No Matter What” by T.I.)
LINKS: “He hails from Washington, DC … standing six feet tall and weighing 235 pounds…. Y … 2 …. R …. R!”
(Y2RR walks to the ring, extending his hand out to the fans, although only a few take his offer and reach out. He slides into the ring and pops to his feet.)
GHEORGHE: “The referee checking all three men…. And now he’s signaling for the bell!”
(SFX: Bell rings.)
SUMMARY [No Show]
The opening bout seemed more like a training camp endeavor rather than a televised wrestling extravaganza as all three men looked awfully green. Y2RR, Bobby Crane, and Jack Vonnegut didn’t seem to make much of an impact on the crowd as the arena was deathly silent. What one might have attributed to early match anxiety, quickly blossomed to full blown botching. Vonnegut went for a double clothesline on his opponents to send them to the outside, but neither Y2RR or Crane budged. The apparent no-selling by his opponent’s seemed to piss Vonnegut off as he screamed at both. Eventually the fans had enough the so-called action in the ring and began to turn on the three men, which stopped the argument in its tracks. Right when things couldn’t get worse, “You Could Be Mine” by Guns n’ Roses blared across the arena. The fans gave the first huge pop of the night as the PRODIGY© Classic Xtreme champion strutted through the curtain and made his way to the ring. All three men looked stunned as Chaos stepped over the top rope. Chaos proceeded to charge all three men, and in an incredible display of power, clotheslined all three men at once. Chaos grabbed Crane. CHAOS BOMB. Chaos grabbed Vonnegut. CHAOS BOMB. Chaos then walked towards Y2RR. Chaos seemed to mouth “what a shitty name…” CHAOS BOMB! With all three of the men laid out by Chaos, the referee had no other option but to call the match. Chaos remained in the ring, the P©X championship belt by his side, as he called for the mic.
WINNER: No contest at 4:20.
GHEORGHE: “CHAOS!! WHAT HAS HE DONE!”
JIVE: “He’s our savior after all!”
GHEORGHE: “The P©X champion has come into this match .. and has totally obliterated Y2RR, Crane and Vonnegut!”
JIVE: “He only did what everyone in this arena was dreaming of!”
GHEORGHE: “Chaos standing in the center of the ring with the belt … and he has the microphone!”
CHAOS: “So I’m sitting backstage … because let’s face it, I don’t really have any challengers for my title.”
(Vonnegut tries to slide into the ring after being helped out by the referee. Chaos stops and stomps on him before forcing him back out.)
CHAOS: “I’m having a chat with LaRoque… and he’s watching this DISASTER going down … and he gives me the nod to … (he smiles) introduce myself… You know .. tell the new men with a contract, ‘Hi. I’m Chaos and I’m your P©X champion.’”
(Crane tries to sneak in the ring behind Chaos, but the champion catches him standing on the apron. Chaos shoots a forearm into his jaw sending him to the arena floor. The fans pop huge.)
CHAOS: “Look boys. This is New ERA, and I’m all for new blood… but as an expert on spilling PLENTY of it, I came out here to deliver you a message… if you want to be a member of New ERA, you better be willing to put your body on the line. After all, I’m looking for my next victim… and well … the boss quite frankly has higher standards.”
(Y2RR makes it into the ring. He charges at Chaos who floors him with a big boot. Chaos bends down and stares in his face.)
CHAOS: “Better luck next time.”
(CUEUP: “You Could Be Mine” by Guns n’ Roses. The crowd pops as Chaos tosses the microphone to the mat and exits the ring.)
JIVE: “That’ll teach them a lesson! When LaRoque is giving Chaos a green light … you know SOMETHING has gone terribly wrong!”
GHEORGHE: “The P©X champion … taking authority … and he’s not even scheduled to be here!”
JIVE: “One thing is for sure.. every other person tonight will be on their best behavior … because you don’t want the beast coming after you!”
GHEORGHE: “The referee trying to help the three men up .. Chaos really did a number on them … wow.”
JIVE: “Something’s going on in the back, Gheorghe! I’m getting word that Sam Baxter is standing by the lockerroom of Peter File!”
GHEORGHE: “Let’s send this backstage to see what is going on.”
Face Down, Ass Up
(CUTTO: Sam Baxter stands in front of a lockerroom. The door is wide open. The camera pans into the room where we see Peter File lying face down in a pile of .. soiled jockstraps.)
GHEORGHE (V/O): “Sam… Sam, what’s going on back there?!”
BAXTER: “Thanks, Tom! Well, as you can see, Peter File has been attacked in his lockerroom!"
JIVE (V/O): “I don’t hear him complaining, though!”
BAXTER: “All I have for you right now is that a few people heard a commotion, three voices, followed by what seemed to be a scuffle.. when officials finally managed to get the door open, the room was empty and Peter File was .. well .. in this position.”
GHEORGHE (V/O): “But there were three voices? How could two of them suddenly disappear?!”
BAXTER: “It looks like they exited through a back door…”
JIVE (V/O): “What’s the word on File’s condition? He has a match later tonight!”
BAXTER: “I just got done talking to Marcus LaRoque while Chaos was in the ring .. and it turns out that Peter File won’t be cleared to wrestle tonight. Jack n’ Hoff will have to go it alone against the Dogs of War and the World Heavyweight champion.”
JIVE (V/O): “Oh boy!”
GHEORGHE (V/O): “Alone?!”
(Sam Baxter nods his head as “the Prophecy” Adrian Willard and Freak walk by. They glance into the lockerroom and see File face down. Freak breaks into a huge smile and goes for the high-five, but Willard ignores him and nods at Baxter.)
JIVE (V/O): “Wait a minute!”
BAXTER: “Adrian! Adrian!! Did you do this?!”
(Willard turns to Baxter and pauses. After a brief second, he turns again and walks down the hallway, Freak in tow.)
BAXTER: “I think he did! Adrian Willard … he caused File’s loss to Hart at Destrucity II … and now he’s taken File out of the main event!”
GHEORGHE (V/O): “Who does he think he is!”
JIVE (V/O): “Peter File’s night has been envisioned …. Have fun with the doctors!”
(CUTTO: Ringside.)
GHEORGHE: “What balls he has! We have to take a quick commercial break .. but when we come back … Mr. Entertainment …”
JIVE: “WOOO!”
GHEORGHE: “… will take on “Total Carnage” Trevor Cane!”
COMMERCIAL BREAK
JIVE: “I hope everyone out there has a paper bag ready … because when Mr. Entertainment steps into the ring.. he’s going to take your breath away!”
GHEORGHE: “The former Television champion was originally schedule to take on Ashe Corvin, but a last minute change to the show will have him taking on Cane instead.”
JIVE: “Corvin unable to make tonight’s show .. but he’ll be back in action shortly.. after that hellacious match against Chaos for the PRODIGY© Classic Xtreme championship at Destrucity II, can you really blame him?!”
GHEORGHE: “Entertainment has been on a mission to regain the Television championship.. while he might have lost in the triple threat at the pay per view, he more than made up for it with a victory over the incredibly talented Karl “the Dragon” Brown at Sin City Showdown.”
JIVE: “Mr. Entertainment will get the Television championship back. No other man has brought the belt the kind of notoriety as he did.”
GHEORGHE: “I don’t think you can argue that Entertainment has been the epitome of a champion … and down the line Erik Black must know that a match with the champion is coming.”
JIVE: “Entertainment never got his contractual rematch against Cruise … and tonight he’s going to take that frustration out on Cane.”
GHEORGHE: “Trevor Cane has been on sort of a spiral since defeating Adam Benjamin.”
JIVE: “He’s had some tough competition .. although how he lost to King Krusher is beyond me. The stars aligned that night and pigs must have flown.”
GHEORGHE: “Nick!”
JIVE: “It’s the truth.”
GHEORGHE: “Well tonight Cane can make all the naysaying disappear by defeating the former Television champion.. let’s send this to Jamie Links who is standing in the ring!”
(CUTTO: In the ring with Jamie Links. The lineup comes on screen.)
Trevor Cane vs. Mr. Entertainment
LINKS: “The following match is scheduled for one fall .. and has a twenty minute time limit! Introducing first…”
(CUEUP: “Anthem for the Year 2000” by Silverchair.)
LINKS: “Hailing from Sarasota, Florida… standing six foot five and weighing 283 pounds… “TOTAL CARNAGE” …. TREVOR … CANE!”
(Cane enters through the curtain, his muscles gleaming in the arena lights. He walks to the ring, his chin up, avoiding contact with the fans. He enters the ring and stops in the middle before flexing.)
GHEORGHE: “Cane seemingly confident that tonight he will walk away with a victory over a tough, tough challenger.”
JIVE: “We’ll see just how confident he is when he is in the ring with ME …. Mister Entertainment!”
(CUEUP: “That’s Entertainment” by the Jam. A lone spotlight appears on the stage.)
LINKS: “And his opponent… hailing from Ashland, Oregon… standing six foot two .. and weighing in at 234 pounds … he is a former New ERA Television champion ….. MISTER …… ENTERTAINMENT!!!”
(The fans jeer. Mr. Entertainment walks to the ring with his arrogance fully showing, trying his best to deliberately incite the crowd, as the spotlight follows him. He slides into the ring, climbs up the turnbuckles and poses, taunting the crowd some more.)
GHEORGHE: “Entertainment climbing down … and now he walks right into the center of the ring!”
JIVE: “The referee standing in between both men .. Can you feel that?!”
GHEORGHE: “What?”
JIVE: “Entertainment!! He radiates pure awesomeness!”
GHEORGHE: “You are hopeless, Nick.”
(SFX: Bell rings.)
SHORTFORM
BEGINNING: With the referee standing between them, Trevor Cane and Mr. Entertainment exchanged heated words. That quickly turned into fists as Cane sent a right hook flying past the referee’s head into the jaw of Entertainment. Cane followed it up with another right that dropped Entertainment to the mat. Mr. Entertainment was quick to his feet, though, and ducked a third hook before hooking Total Carnage’s arms and flipping him to the mat. The former Television Champion then dropped down to the mat with Cane and locked on an arm bar, complimented with some slaps to the back of the head. Cane didn’t appreciate this and struggled to get out of the hold. Cane powered his way back to his feet and drove the elbow into the gut of his opponent breaking the hold. With Mr. Entertainment staggered, Cane barreled through him with the clothesline. Total Carnage didn’t let up and caught Entertainment as he rose with another vicious clothesline. Cane yanked the former Television champion to his feet and hooked the arms for a butterfly suplex, but Mr. Entertainment blocked the hold and sent Cane over his shoulder with the backbody drop. Cane sat up, startled by the counter, and this momentary pause was enough for Entertainment to send a dropkick to the back of his neck. The former Television champion brought Cane to his feet, hooked his leg around Cane’s and drove him backwards with the Russian legsweep. Entertainment went for the quick cover, but “Total Carnage” was easily able to get the shoulder up.
2nd QUARTER: Mr. Entertainment showed no signs of slowing as he kept Cane off his game. Cane tried to stop the momentum, but the most entertaining wrestler on the roster completely outclassed him. Cane, after countering a DDT, took off against the ropes and went for the elbow .. only to hit nothing but the mat after Entertainment rolled out of the way. With Cane on his back, Mr. Entertainment kipped up and landed and elbow of his own. Mr. Entertainment brought the former enlightened one to the corner and draped a leg around the middle rope before drilling it repeatedly with boots of his own. With Cane hobbling out of the corner, Mr. Entertainment came from behind and took out “Total Carnage’s” good knee with a stiff shot. Cane went down in a blaze of .. well, not glory, which allowed the former Television champion to float over and lock on a front facelock. The referee dropped down to make sure there was no choke, but Entertainment was in the clear. Cane planted his hands and basically began doing push-ups as he tried to power out of the hold. Entertainment struggled to keep the facelock on, but Cane used his strength to climb to his feet. Mr. Entertainment realized his predicament and broke the hold before rebounding off the near ropes, but as he came back, Trevor Cane was ready, catching the former Television champion and spinning him around before nailing the spinebuster. Cane went for the cover but was unable to put the match away.
3rd QUARTER: Cane kept control throughout the third quarter of the match. With Mr. Entertainment caught in the corner, Cane railed into him as hard and fast as he could. Mr. Entertainment’s head looked as if it was about to fly into the first row. Cane took a few steps back and finished the barrage off with a clothesline. Cane cockily brought the former Television champion to the center of the ring before scooping him for a Tombstone piledriver. Mr. Entertainment wasn’t able to maneuver out of the hold and Cane planted his opponent. Cane, a smile on his face sensing victory, nonchalantly places his arm over Entertainment’s chest. Cane was shocked, however, when Entertainment kicked out after two. Cane scurried to his feet and waited as Entertainment slowly rose. Cane spun his opponent around and locked on a full nelson, but Mr. Entertainment wrapped his leg around blocking the slam. Cane tried once more, but this time Entertainment reached back, grabbed Cane’s head, and dropped to the mat jamming Cane’s jaw. With Cane on the mat, Mr. Entertainment managed to make his way to his feet first, and Cane was unable to move out of the way of the swift kick to the head. Entertainment grabbed “Total Carnage” off the mat and before Cane knew it, Entertainment floored him with the Implant DDT. Entertainment hooked the leg hoping for the victory, but Trevor Cane instinctively kicked out. While Trevor Cane remained on the mat, Mr. Entertainment climbed the ropes and flew off driving the elbow into Cane’s sternum, however this also only got him a two count.
END: After avoiding another elbow drop, this time off the ropes and not from the top, Cane rolled to the outside. Mr. Entertainment was not about to Cane get away, and as Cane turned, he watched as Entertainment dove through the seconds ropes! The momentum took Cane down, ramming the back of his head into the bottom of the guardrail. The referee began the count as the two men remained motionless on the arena floor. There’s a reason why Mr. Entertainment is considered one of, if not THE, greatest Television champion in New ERA history. Entertainment used the guardrail to bring himself to his feet, and with a fistful of hair, slammed Cane face first into ground. With “Total Carnage” seeing stars, Mr. Entertainment hoisted him to his feet. Cane was unable to do anything as Entertainment sent him flying into the ringsteps. The referee had seen enough and threatened Entertainment with disqualification if he didn’t bring the action back in the ring, so the former Television champion grudgingly obliged. Cane was rolled onto his back, his eyes glazed in a way that would make Erik Black jealous, as Mr. Entertainment climbed the turnbuckle pads. With a knowing look on his face, Mr. Entertainment drew the air from the fan’s lungs with an awe-inspiring move he calls the Shooting Entertainment. From there on it was all elementary as Cane fell victim to a stun gun, and finally the “That’s Entertainment!” rolling german suplex.
WINNER: Mr. Entertainment after hitting “That’s Entertainment!” at 14:10.
LINKS: “The winner of this match .. via pinfall ….”
(CUEUP: “That’s Entertainment” by the Jam.)
LINKS: “MISTER …. ENTERTAINMENT!”
JIVE: “Eat your heart out, Erik… this man is coming for you!”
GHEORGHE: “Mr. Entertainment shoring it up here tonight on RAUCOUS …. Trevor Cane unable to make a mark.”
JIVE: “Oh he made a mark all right … he just left it on the mat!”
GHEORGHE: “The former Television champion …”
You Want It? You Got It!
(CUEUP: “Violet” by Hole. The fans in the arena begin to jeer as Juliet Marceau steps through the curtain.)
JIVE: “Just when things couldn’t get any better, New ERA’s Vice President is here to grace us with her presence!”
GHEORGHE: “What does she have up her sleeves?”
JIVE: “What?! Why must she be up to something??”
GHEORGHE: “Juliet Marceau doesn’t just come out for a quick chat, Nick. When she makes an appearance, she has something planned.”
(Marceau stands on the stage as Mr. Entertainment steps through the ring ropes. He looks up at her.)
MARCEAU: “Well, well.. you know, the last guys who ran this place (under her breath) into the ground .. (she clears her throat as the fans pop) they made a huge mistake in not following protocol.”
GHEORGHE: “Here we go..”
MARCEAU: “If there’s one thing I hate, it’s not following protocol.”
JIVE: “She is a stickler for the rules.”
GHEORGHE: “Except when they apply to her!”
MARCEAU: “So it absolutely irked me that after Cameron Cruise weaseled his way to the Television championship (crowd jeers!) that you never received what was rightfully yours.”
(Entertainment’s ears perk up.)
GHEORGHE: “Is she going to do what I think she’s going to do?!”
JIVE: “Finally!”
MARCEAU: “Tonight.. the Television championship is on the line … and whoever wins the match … whether it be Erik Black .. or ………….. Erik Black…”
(SFX: HUGE JEERS.)
GHEORGHE: “Now that’s not nice!”
MARCEAU: “Will go on to defend their Television championship in the main event at the next RAUCOUS … from Boise, Idaho … against YOU… Mister Entertainment!”
(Entertainment smiles as the fans continue to jeer.)
GHEORGHE: “ENTERTAINMENT WILL FINALLY GET HIS REMATCH!”
JIVE: “Black’s days are numbered!”
GHEORHGHE: “If he can get past Jorgenson tonight!”
(Marceau turns and walks through the curtain. The camera cuts to Mr. Entertainment, obviously pleased with the announcemen.)
GHEORGHE: “But either way .. what a main event that will be!”
JIVE: “Every time Mr. Entertainment is in a main event, an angel gets his wings.”
GHEORGHE: “Sometimes I wonder just why LaRoque keeps you around.”
JIVE: “His fault for signing me to a no-termination contract.”
GHEORGHE: “Ladies and gentlemen our next match should be a doozy..”
JIVE: “You mean a ‘snoozy’…”
GHEORGHE: “The former World Tag Team and Television champion Cameron Cruise will take on the man who made a huge impression at Destrucity II .. the revelation of “the Prophecy” Adrian Willard when he absolutely clobbered the World Heavyweight champion in the main event shocked everyone in the MGM Grand Garden Arena …”
JIVE: “The hits kept coming, too, because he single handedly removed Peter File from the main event tonight!”
GHEORGHE: “Single handedly??? He and Freak double teamed Peter File!”
JIVE: “PLEASE DON’T PUT THAT IMAGE IN MY HEAD.”
GHEORHGE: “Oh, stop it!”
JIVE: “YOU!”
GHEORGHE: “Willard making his official wrestling debut here in New ERA … he could score a big coup tonight by beating Cruise.”
JIVE: “Yea, he’d join the scores of others who’ve walked over that prick.”
GHEORGHE: “Cruise held the Television and World Tag Team championships at the same time, Nick…”
JIVE: “And he practically lost them at the same time, too!”
GHEORGHE: “… let’s go to Jamie.”
(CUTTO: Jamie Links. The lineup for the match comes on screen.)
Adrian Willard vs. Cameron Cruise
LINKS: “The following match is scheduled for one fall and has a twenty minute time limit! Introducing first… led to the ring by FREAK…”
(CUEUP: “Genesis” by Justice. Freak and Adrian Willard step onto the stage.)
GHEORGHE: “Those two men are like night and day…”
JIVE: “Wow.. Racist much?”
GHEORGHE: “What?!”
LINKS: “Hailing from Chicago, Illinois… he stands six foot four and weighs 285 pounds… “the PROPHECY” …. ADRIAN …. WILLARD!”
(A bit of pyrotechnics as “The Prophecy” goes across the screen. The crowd boos loudly as Adrian Willard walks down the ramp slowly checking his gear. Freak yells at some of the audience members and tries to grab the breasts of some females. Adrian now stands in front of the ring grabbing the bottom rope and climbing up the side he then enters the ring. Freak stands on the outside taunting the fans as Adrian poses in front of the ropes. Freak takes the cigarette out of his mouth and smothers it against the ring post.)
JIVE: “Get that man an ashtray!”
GHEORGHE: “Willard is an incredible specimen.. Cameron Cruise has his work cut out for him tonight.”
JIVE: “Cameron Cruise has his work cut out for him just tying his shoe laces..”
(CUEUP: “Killing in the Name Of” by Rage Against the Machine. The crowd pops as Cruise steps forward.)
GHEORGHE: “Cruise focusing in on the ring .. from what I heard he was none too pleased with Willard and his antics.”
JIVE: “You talked about Trevor Cane being on a downward slide.. Cameron Cruise hit rock bottom at Destrucity, and somehow managed to burrow even deeper at Sin City Showdown.”
LINKS: “Hailing from Jacksonville, North Carolina … he is the former New ERA World Tag Team and Television champion……. CAMERON …… CRUISE!!!”
GHEORGHE: “Cruise making his way to the ring … and he hasn’t taken his eyes of Willard!”
JIVE: “First things first, Gheorghe.. the referee telling Freak he needs to exit the ring..”
GHEORGHE: “Freak exiting the ring … and he spots a young woman in the front row and bailed the ring in a hurry!”
JIVE: “Hmm.. watching Adrian Willard demolish Cruise .. or a quick booty call .. which would you choose?”
GHEORGHE: “Freak walking to the guardrail. OH MY.. He is grabbing the front of his pants!”
JIVE: “I don’t hear any complaints from her!”
GHEORGHE: “Cruise in the ring .. and here we go!”
(SFX: Bell rings.)
SHORTFORM
BEGINNING: The two men walked to the center of the ring, the space between them filled with intense friction. Willard let loose with a flurry of closed fists that kept Cruise off balance, sending him back first into the corner. Cruise blocked the final few, but “the Prophecy” continued the assault with a knee jammed right into his opponent’s gut. With the former Television Champion doubled over, Adrian Willard grabbed his head and ran out of the corner nailing the running bulldog. A quick count only got one, however, so Willard hopped to his feet driving the boots into Cruise’s torso to keep him down. Cameron Cruise, the wily veteran, swept the legs from underneath Willard and climbed on top his fallen opponent to return the closed fist favor. Cruise brought Willard to his feet and sent him into the ropes, catching him on the return for a powerslam. With Willard sitting up, Cruise placed the knee in between the shoulder blades and locked the fingers underneath the chin hoping to get the submission. Willard wouldn’t give him that pleasure, hanging on for a good minute or so, causing Cruise to release the hold and move on. Cruise measured Willard as he rose to his feet, and hit the picture perfect dropkick that sent Willard over the top rope to the arena floor. Freak ran over to Willard and the two men seemed to reconfigure their gameplan on the spot. Cameron Cruise stood in the ring egging Willard on. Cruise said something to Freak that almost got the Self-Proclaimed Sex Machine into the ring, but Willard held him back and went instead.
2nd QUARTER: Willard eventually returned to the ring and the competitors went to the collar and elbow tieup, both trying to get the advantage. Willard pulled back at the last moment causing Cruise to stumble a few steps, but that was more than enough for Willard to lock his waist, go forward into the ropes and roll Cruise up for a surprise pinfall. Cruise managed to get the shoulders up before the three, and he angrily got to his feet, just in time for a jab in the eyes by “the Prophecy.” Willard hooked Cruise’s head, then his tights, and brought him completely vertical in the air before waiting a few seconds and executing the stalling suplex. Willard then went to the corner and came out for a running knee drop, which he hit, before covering Cruise for another two. Freak cheered on the outside and Willard shot him a quick wink before bringing the former Television and World Tag Team champion up. Willard reached back for a haymaker, but Cruise ducked, grabbed his head from behind and planted him with the reverse neckbreaker. Both men lay on the mat trying to catch their breath before Cruise reached over for the cover. Willard was waiting and raised his shoulder at 2. Both men sat up in unison as the crowd chanted “CAM-ER-ON! CAM-ER-ON!” Freak jumped up and down trying to shut the crowd down which, of course, made them chant even louder.
3rd QUARTER: Willard hooked Cruise for another stalling suplex, but Cruise blocked it. As Willard went for another try, Cruise broke the hold with a well-placed knee to the gut. Willard released the hold, and Cruise clobbered him with a short-arm clothesline. Willard scrambled to his feet and charged at Cruise, but Cruise took him back down to the mat with the drop toe hold. While Willard slammed his hand into the mat, Cruise was already against the far ropes. Willard got to his feet and turned … right into a flying crossbody! The referee counted and Willard was left in shock at the near three count. Both men back on their feet, but Willard countered the irish whip with one of his own and sent Cruise into the ropes. Cruise rebounded and couldn’t avoid being locked into the belly to belly suplex that sent him flying through the air and crashing into the ropes. Cruise, knocked senseless, was a sitting duck as Willard ran in and slid his boots right into the skull. “The Prophecy” pulled Cruise to the center of the ring and spread the legs before dropping a double leg drop into the extremely lower abdomen. Cruise looked to be in immense pain, but that didn’t stop Willard, who grabbed Cruise’s head and brought him up. Willard walked to the corner and drove Cruise’s head into the top turnbuckle pad before setting him up on the top rope. Willard went up with Cruise and hooked him from behind before both men went flying, with Cruise the recipient of a belly to back superplex!
END: The fans by this point have been sitting on the edge of their seats for the last several minutes, and were not disappointed. Willard and Cruise flip flopped with subsequent exchanges. Willard hit the sidewalk slam that got another two count, only to be the victim of a backbreaker by Cruise a few minutes later. The real fun began when Cruise missed the missile dropkick after Freak warned Willard. Adrian Willard scooped Cruise up and brought him to the near corner. Hooking the head, Willard hoisted Cruise onto the top rope and quickly followed. With both men on the top rope, Adrian Willard placed Cameron Cruise’s head in between his legs and called for what could have been a deadly top rope piledriver, but before he had the chance, Cruise rammed his head upwards right into the family jewels. Adrian Willard’s face went from one of pain, to one of shock as he began to fall backwards off the top rope. Willard hit the mat hard, and was left wide open for the top rope splash. Cruise hooked the leg and the ref brought his hand down for the count three times; while the fans celebrated, the ref was fast to his feet to signal that Willard somehow managed to kick out! Cameron Cruise rises to his feet and calls for the Reality Check, which forces Freak to finally get involved. Freak hops onto the apron and starts yelling something about how Mercedes Devon is a lousy fuck. Cruise storms over and swings wildly, but Freak jumps down and Cruise is spun out. Adrian Willard took full advantage and charged in, but Cruise sidesteps the clothesline. With Willard off balance, Cruise hooked him and the fans exploded after the Willard fell victim to the Reality Check. Three seconds later and the former Television champion sealed the deal.
WINNER: Cameron Cruise after hitting the Reality Check at 19:39.
LINKS: “The winner of this match … at nineteen minutes and thirty nine seconds …. CAMERON ……… CRUISE!!!!”
JIVE: “NO!! GOD DAMMIT!”
GHEORGHE: “WOW! What an incredible match between those two men! That match was only 21 seconds from going to the time limit!”
JIVE: “This is impossible! I demand a recount!”
GHEORGHE: “Recount?! There’s no recounts in *professional wrestling, Nick! Both men put on a damn fine show .. it could have gone either way, but the former Television champion managing to pull out the victory at the very end!”
JIVE: “The clock is off .. the twenty minutes were up!”
GHEORGHE: “The time keeper said the time of the match was 19 minutes and thirty nine seconds … it was definitely a close one!”
JIVE: “Cruise might have won this battle, but Adrian Willard will win the war here in New ERA. He has bigger and better fish to fry.”
GHEORGHE: “We have to take a quick commercial break.. but when we come back .. the Television championship will be on the line as “the Druid” Erik Black defends his belt against the fan’s favorite … Jeff “Greenhorn” Jorgenson!”
COMMERCIAL BREAK
GHEORGHE: “Welcome back .. and our next match promises to be one that the fans here in the arena will remember for years.”
JIVE: “Which is more than we can say about Erik Black .. who’ll forget it within minutes of this match being over.”
GHEORGHE: “Jeff Jorgenson has had a roller coaster ride to the championship shot here tonight … it all started at WFW:NE Unplugged when he and Mr. Entertainment got into fisticuffs in the Christmas Tree Lot brawl .. and continued when he defeated the former Television champion on RAUCOUS..”
JIVE: “Jorgenson has a rabbit’s foot shoved somewhere up his ass.”
GHEORGHE: “The fans have been solidly behind this shooting star .. at Destrucity II he won the #1 contender’s match against Entertainment AND Steve Burke … by pinning both at the same time!”
JIVE: “This kid’s whole world is going to come crashing down tonight.”
(CUTTO: Ringside as the lineup for the match comes on screen.)
Television Championship
Jeff Jorgenson vs. Erik Black (c)
LINKS: “The following match is scheduled for one fall … has a thirty minute time limit .. and is for the New ERA of Wrestling TELEVISION CHAMPIONSHIP!!! Introducing first…”
(CUEUP: “Any Way You Want It” by Journey. The fans EXPLODE as Jeff Jorgenson comes onto the stage. He raises a hand in recognition and bolts to the ring, full of enery!)
LINKS: “He hails from Merrow, Connecticut… and is the current #1 contender …. JEFF …. “GREENHORN” …. JORGENSON!!!”
(The fans pop once more as Jorgenson gets into the ring.)
JIVE: “Look at him!! He is a god damned stick! Erik Black’s smoked spliffs that have weighed more than Jorgenson!”
GHEORGHE: “Jorgenson is young, he’s eager, he’s talented, and he has the fans in his corner … what more can you ask?”
LINKS: “And his opponent..”
(CUEUP: “Holy Mountain” by Sleep. The crowd pops again as the lights dim.)
LINKS: “Hailing from Indianapolis, Indiana… weighing in at 218 pounds and standing five foot ten … he is the current New ERA of Wrestling TELEVISION CHAMPION ….. “The DRUID” …. ERIK …. BLACK!!!”
(The droning opening note to Sleep's “Holy Mountain” BLARES over the PA like a hypnotic hum transmitted from a land beyond time and space! On the screen, the image of a glowing orange sun rises over the crest of a mountain as titanic clouds sail through the sky. As the guitar rips into the lazy opening riffs, the colors distort and dance, giving a psychedelic effect that leaves many fans in a trance-like state.
SFX: Pyros FLASH over the stage!
As the lyrics come in, the Television champion steps out onto the stage, wearing the robe of the weed priest and holding his .. water pipe high over his head for the cheering fans to see! Comically bobbing in time with the music, the self-proclaimed "Man on the Mountain" makes an exaggerated procession down the rampway toward the ring, occasionally stopping to throw his hand out into his favorite pose, arm outstretched as though guiding his vision beyond horizons seen only by the mortal eye!
Black enters the ring, and pops up to a turnbuckle just as the bass and drums drop out of the music to allow the guitar to lead in the chorus riff... meanwhile, the Dopesmoker lights the water pipe -- which we can only assume is filled with a tobacco product of some kind -- and draws in a long breath. Just as the song comes full ensemble, he sets free a holy dove of thick, white smoke into the air as he pops into his "horizon-gazing" pose yet again! The cloud sails over the heads of the audience and eventually dissipates, and "The Man on the Mountain" drops back into the ring, ready to do business.)
GHEORGHE: “Erik Black certainly…”
JIVE: “High?”
GHEORGHE: “Relaxed…”
JIVE: “High.”
GHEORGHE: “Black handing the Television championship to the referee … and now he peers over at Jorgenson..”
JIVE: “I think right now he’s trying to narrow the multiple Greenhorns to at least one or two.”
GHEORGHE: “The referee hands the belt to the ring attendant… and here … we …. go!”
(SFX: Bell rings.)
SHORTFORM
BEGINNING: The fans in the arena had been awaiting this match all evening. As soon as the bell rang, Jeff Jorgenson had the entire crowd behind him. Erik Black walked, more like sauntered, around the ring while Jorgenson waited. The two men hooked up in the center of the ring, and Black’s size advantage, which albeit is not THAT much, showed early as he backed Jorgenson to the ropes. The referee called for the break, which ended up being clean, before allowing the two men to continue. Black came after Jorgenson, but the Greenhorn ducked and grabbed Black from behind, dropping to his knees for the backslide. The fans popped, but only for a one count. Black quickly returned to his feet, and Jorgenson walked right into a boot to the gut. The Television champion sent the challenger into the ropes, and caught him on the return with a big back body drop. Jorgenson hit the mat and immediately grabbed his lower back as Black stood over him. “The Druid” grabbed onto Jorgenson’s arm to bring him up, but the Greenhorn spun around, used his one free hand for leverage, and kipped up before twisting Black’s arm around and behind him for the hammerlock. The fans popped huge as Jeff Jorgenson ran with Black forward slamming him chest first into the turnbuckle pads, and continued popping as Jorgenson jumped to the second ropes and came flying off with a second rope moonsault that garnered a two count from the referee.
2nd QUARTER: The fast start sputtered in an instant when Jorgenson miscalculated a springboard clothesline attempt. The Television Champion caught Jorgenson’s arm in mid-air, and hit an awe-inspiring arm drag that many in the arena had not seen before. Jorgenson went crashing to the corner, and “the Druid” followed in after. Black grabbed Jorgenson off the mat and placed him in the corner bombarding him with shots to the torso with his boot before finishing it off with a reverse heel kick. The Television Champion brought the challenger out of the corner before hooking the legs and nailing the Hasheeshian Piledriver. The referee was there for the two count. The fans began to stomp the arena floor, almost bringing the place down, and Jeff Jorgenson seemed to feed off their energy. He fought off Erik Black’s attempt to bring him back to his feet, and when Black came at him with a double axe handle, Jorgenson drove his head into the midsection. Jorgenson sent Black to the ropes with the irish whip, but the Television champion reversed! Jorgenson went flying into the ropes, but it was all Greenhorn on the return as he countered Black and ended up sending the Television champion flying across the ring with a headscissors! “Greenhorn” popped to his feet and pounced as Black got to his feet, too. Jorgenson went for a springboard clothesline again, and Black countered, sending him up and over … but the young upstart landed on the turnbuckle pad! Black was caught with his pants down as Jorgenson turned and draped his legs over the shoulders and locking the Victory Roll! The fans almost broke into riot, but the champion was able to get out at 2.
3rd QUARTER: The two men traded momentum heading into the later stages of the match, but that all came to a standstill when Black telegraphed a hurricanrana attempt by Greenhorn and countered with the Blackout facebuster powerbomb. Black only managed to get a two count, but the move seemingly took all the wind out of Jorgenson’s sails. The Television Champion then went into total control of the match hitting an ensemble of moves that kept the challenger on the mat. Jorgenson attempted to snatch back momentum by squirming out of a suplex, but Black countered the german suplex and nailed a bridging one of his own. The crowd was relieved when the young fan favorite managed to get out of the pin. The Champion scooped Jorgenson from the mat and brought him to the corner before driving the shoulder into the midsection. While Jorgenson was doubled over, Black grabbed him by the back of the neck and ran out with the single arm running bulldog. Jorgenson rolled onto his back as Black climbed the ropes. The Television champion raised his arms in the air before flying off with a beautiful frogsplash attempt, but the end result wasn’t as nice as the Greenhorn put up the knees. Erik Black rolled off his opponent, clutching his stomach in pain, as the referee began the count. Both men remained on the mat until seven, and at that point both men began to make their way to the ropes on the opposite sides of the ring. The referee stopped his count at nine as both men successfully made it up.
END: The longer this match went on the more sluggish Erik Black seemed. His eyes, once glazed over, began to droop. Jeff Jorgenson took full advantage of the situation by running circles around “the Druid.” Black and Jorgenson locked up, with Jorgenson sent to the ropes. However, Jorgenson managed to grab ahold of the top rope while Black bent over. Realizing there was no one coming, the Television Champion stood and saw Jorgenson holding onto the ropes. He charged at Greenhorn, but Jorgenson was ready for him pulling down the top rope as Black went flying over to the arena floor. Jorgenson was cat-like as he climbed the top rope and measured his opponent. The Television championship on the line meant that Jorgenson held nothing back. He flew through the air with grace and landed right on top of the champion. The referee was quick to begin the count, and Jorgenson rolled into the ring holding his side. Jeff Jorgenson proceeded to circle the ring to rile the crowd up bringing them to a frenzy. On the outside, Erik Black clawed his way to the ringsteps where his … favorite “water pipe” stood. The referee continued his count as Black fumbled in his pocket for a lighter. The fans, the referee, and Jorgenson were all in awe as the Television Champion “caught a breather” by inhaling the contents of the water pipe. Immediately Black’s eyes lit up and it was as if he got the second wind from the water pipe. Black rolled into the ring and caught Jorgenson’s leg when he went for a quick shot. Jorgenson knew what was next as Black used his other leg to take the Greenhorn down to the mat and lock on the reverse mandible claw coupled with a chickenwing hold he dubbed “Cottonmouth.” The fans tried their hardest to will Jorgenson out of the hold, but after a good forty five seconds, Jorgenson finally gave in.
WINNER: Erik Black retains the Television Championship after locking on the Cottonmouth at 24:01.
LINKS: “The winner of this match …. And STILL New ERA of Wrestling TELEVISION CHAMPION ….. “the DRUID” …. ERIK …… BLACK!!!”
(CUEUP: “Holy Mountain” by Sleep. Black grabs the championship belt and his “friend” and high tails it up the ramp, fumbling with a lighter at the same time.)
JIVE: “And he’s off to .. celebrate!”
GHEORGHE: “What a heartbreaking loss here tonight for the Greenhorn! Jorgenson was thisclose to winning the Television championship … and he took Erik Black to the limits!”
JIVE: “Black got some outside help, you could say .. but his real challenge awaits … because he’ll be facing Mr. Entertainment in the main event next show!”
GHEORGHE: “Jeff Jorgenson rolling out underneath the bottom ring ropes … and the disappointment is evident on his face. He has nothing to be ashamed of, though, he did a great job here tonight.”
JIVE: “A great job? He would be Television champion if he had done a great job.”
GHEORGHE: “It was a hard fought match, Nick. You can say what you want, but you can’t take away the pure athleticism displayed tonight by Jorgenson. He has a definite future .. and one day, without a doubt, he’ll be the Television champion.”
JIVE: “The day he wears the Television championship around his waist is the same day that Jean Rabesque raises from the dead and wins the World Heavyweight championship around his creaky waist.”
GHEORGHE: “Nick!”
JIVE: “Don’t we have a commercial to go to?”
GHEORGHE: “…. Stay tuned .. because when we come back .. it is tonight’s main event … what apparently will be a handicap match as the New ERA World Tag Team champions, Jack n’ Hoff, will face off against the Dogs of War and the New ERA World Heavyweight champion Shawn Hart!”
COMMERCIAL BREAK
GHEORGHE: “Welcome back to RAUCOUS .. and up next, Nick, is tonight’s main event!”
JIVE: “Shawn Hart was handed a gift earlier tonight by Adrian Willard when he took out Peter File .. and now Hart and the Dogs of War have the advantage in this three on two affair.”
GHEORGHE: “Well, we don’t know for sure that Adrian Willard was the person who attacked File.”
JIVE: “Oh c’mon! He just happened to be there?”
GHEORGHE: “Regardless of whether “the Prophecy” did or did not attack Peter File, the end result means that the World Tag Team champions will now have to go this alone.”
JIVE: “The Dogs of War fooled the world at Destrucity II … even beating each other’s brains out … and you know they’ll be gunning for Jack n’ Hoff in the near future.”
GHEORGHE: “Jason Payne and Chris McMillan .. back together again for the first time in .. god knows how long… not only are both men incredible singles wrestlers, but they have known each other for so long … and know each other so well … that the World Tag Team championships are sure to be around their waists.”
JIVE: “As long as they sterilize them … who knows where they’ve been in the two months or so Jack n’ Hoff has had them!”
GHEORGHE: “The fans here in Salt Lake City are ready to go… and so are we! RAUCOUS’ main event .. is coming up right now!”
(The camera cuts to the ring as the lineup for the main event comes on screen.)
MAIN EVENT
Handicap 3 vs 2 Tag Team Match
Jack n' Hoff (c) vs. The Dogs of War & Shawn Jessica Hart, PhD (c)
LINKS: “The following match is scheduled for one fall .. and is tonight’s MAIN EVENT! Introducing first….”
(CUEUP: “What’s My Age Again” by Blink-182. The fans pop as Jack n’ Hoff come through the curtain, the New ERA World Tag Team championships around their waists. Jack runs down the ramp and jumps on the ring apron shaking it up and down violently. Hoff slowly follows, rolling his eyes at his partner’s actions.)
LINKS: “Weighing in at a combined weight of 456 pounds … they are the current New ERA of Wrestling WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS ….. JACK ….. HOFF … JACK n’ HOFF!”
(The crowd pops again as they take the belts from their waists and hold them in the air.)
JIVE: “I never thought I’d see the day when those two idiots would be the ACTUAL World Tag Team champions.”
GHEORGHE: “They’re a talented duo, Nick .. they had bad luck in the past, but that all changed at Destrucity II.”
(CUEUP: “The Dogs of War” by Pink Floyd. The crowd pops as the lights dim and growling fills the arena.)
LINKS: “Now coming to the ring … at a combined weight of 505 pounds … “the WOLF” CHRIS McMILLAN ….. “the Dog of War” JASON PAYNE……. THE DOGS …. OF WAR!”
(Payne and McMillan step through the curtain, their eyes focused on Jack n’ Hoff in the ring. They make their way to the bottom of the ramp where McMillan turns, cups his hands around his mouth, and howls.)
JIVE: “Look at them… they look ready to take the belts right here, right now!”
LINKS: “And finally….”
(CUEUP: “Nobody Does It Better” by Carly Simon. The crowd explodes as Shawn Jessica Hart, PhD steps through the curtain. He holds the New ERA World Heavyweight championship in the air.)
LINKS: “Hailing from Orlando, Florida… he stands five foot eleven and weighs 224 pounds … and the New ERA of Wrestling WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION …… SHAWN … JESSICA … HART … PEE AYCH DEE!!”
(Hart struts his stuff down the ramp as the fans on both sides try to reach out and grab him. He joins the Dogs of War as they all get into the ring.)
GHEORGHE: “The World Heavyweight champion and his teammates now in the ring..”
JIVE: “And Jack n’ Hoff roll to the outside to strategerize!”
GHEORGHE: “Strategerize?”
JIVE: “I’m reading the G.W. Bush biography..”
GHEORGHE: “… you’re reading?”
JIVE: “…”
GHEORGHE: “Jack n’ Hoff exchange high fives and they roll back in the ring … and the referee now explaining the rules … and here we go!”
(SFX: Bell rings.)
JIVE: “Hoff on the outside … and that leaves Jack in the ring with McMillan it’s looking like.”
GHEORGHE: “Indeed. The Wolf and Jack starting things off … and they lock up in the middle of the ring.”
JIVE: “What we’re seeing is a preview of the inevitable. This is a good chance for both Jack n’ Hoff and The Dogs of War to get a feel for each other.”
GHEORGHE: “Both men struggling for control … McMillan seems to be getting the upperhand, and he places his leg behind Jack’s and takes him down!”
JIVE: “McMillan almost lost his balance in the process, as well.”
GHEORGHE: “Jack scrambles to his feet and runs right into a hip toss! Jack up … and gets taken down again by a drop toe hold! McMillan hops to his feet and waves his hands at one half of the World Tag Team champions.”
JIVE: “McMillan might be looking a bit rough, but he’s still able to keep up with the young gun.”
GHEORGHE: “The two men walk towards each other and go for another lo.. no! Jack with a quick punch to the midsection! He swings around McMillan and yanks his hair slamming him head first to the mat!”
JIVE: “Hey now! The Wolf is already losing hair left and right, I don’t think he’ll appreciate the extra help!”
GHEORGHE: “Jack driving the knee into the throat of the Wolf .. and he keeps the pressure on! The referee with the count … but Jack releases!”
JIVE: “Jack doesn’t want to get disqualified and hand the Dogs of War a victory in their first encounter together.”
GHEORGHE: “Jack with the arm bringing McMillan to his feet … and he walks his opponent into his corner and tags in Hoff!”
JIVE: “Jack has a tendency to take high risk chances, so getting Hoff in there is probably a good decision on his part.”
GHEORGHE: “Hoff in the ring now .. and he takes over the arm from his partner… and ducks underneath and brings it back into a hammerlock!”
JIVE: “The World Tag Team champions are going through the motions right now ..”
GHEORGHE: “McMillan reaching around trying to grab onto anything he can … but Hoff has the hammerlock secured.”
JIVE: “McMillan trying his hardest though!”
GHEORGHE: “Hoff trying to maintain his grip, but McMillan is starting to make waves.. and he breaks free! McMillan spins and grabs onto Hoff and sends him into the ropes!”
JIVE: “BUT HERE COMES HOFF!”
GHEORGHE: “And Hoff comes back with the flying forearm and nails the Wolf! Hoff up and makes the tag to Jack.”
JIVE: “Quick tags early on. Smart move.”
GHEORGHE: “Hoff bringing McMillan to his feet … and he sends him into the ropes! McMillan on the rebound .. and Hoff with the drop toe hold… and JACK DROPS THE LEG ACROSS THE BACK OF THE NECK! Here’s the first pin of the match … but McMillan easily gets out before the two.”
JIVE: “Jack grabbing McMillan .. and he has him up! Look out here!”
GHEORGHE: “McMillan sent flying into the corner by Jack! Jack charges in after him .. BUT McMILLAN PULLS HIMSELF OUT!”
JIVE: “Jack runs chest first into the corner… and McMillan is making his way to his corner!”
GHEORGHE: “McMillan makes the tag to his partner… and Jason Payne steps into the ring!”
JIVE: “Uh oh!”
GHEORGHE: “This does not look good for Jack! Jason Payne catches him by the throat as Jack charged in … AND THE DOG OF WAR PICKS JACK UP AND SLAMS HIM INTO THE MAT WITH THE CHOKESLAM!”
JIVE: “Just look what’s happening right now! Jack and Hoff started this thing off hot .. but Jason Payne comes into the ring and puts an immediate halt on any momentum they had!”
GHEORGHE: “Jason Payne, a former PRODIGY© Classic Xtreme champion … he’s a hell of a wrestler.. and could one day soon hold the World Tag Team championship .. AND the World Heavyweight championship!”
JIVE: “I don’t think Shawn Hart wants to hear you say that, Gheorghe!”
GHEORGHE: “Payne grabbing Jack off the mat .. and sends him back first into the corner … here comes Payne charging in after… AND TAKES OFF HIS HEAD WITH THAT CLOTHESLINE!”
JIVE: “Jack falls to the mat and Payne with the quick cover!”
GHEORGHE: “ONE ………. TWO …. KICKOUT! Jack taking a lot of punishment right now …”
JIVE: “Ohhh no..”
GHEORGHE: “Hoff just climbed to the top rope! Jason Payne is getting back to his feet and he doesn’t see the World Tag Team champion!”
JIVE: “Here comes Hoff!”
GHEORGHE: “HOFF FLIES OFF THE TOP ROPE …….”
JIVE: “Payne catches him!! He catches him!”
GHEORGHE: “Jason Payne all over Hoff … AND HE HITS THE SPINEBUSTER!!!”
JIVE: “Hoff came flying off the top rope .. and got planted with the spinebuster on the way down! Did you see that?!”
GHEORGHE: “Hoff’s spine cracking against the mat … and there’s the cover!”
JIVE: “But he’s not the legal man!”
GHEORGHE: “The referee trying to tell the Dog of War Hoff isn’t the legal man .. and he finally gets up and slaps Hoff in the face.”
JIVE: “Jack is back up though! He’s standing behind Payne waiting!”
GHEORGHE: “Jason Payne turns …. Jack hops up and grabs his head … FACEBUSTER!! Jack with the quick cover… ONE ………… TWO ………… BUT McMILLAN IN THE RING AND KICKS JACK IN THE BACK OF THE HEAD!”
JIVE: “The Wolf in there just to make sure! Jack and Hoff are both on the mat .. and Jason Payne is in between them!”
GHEORGHE: “The World Heavyweight champion standing on the outside… and he is watching this with a wary eye.”
JIVE: “Hart just needs to sit there and look pretty.. Peter File, the man he beat at Destrucity II thanks to Adrian Willard, no longer in the match.”
GHEORGHE: “Jack getting to his feet .. and he’s walking over to his partner and helps him to his feet…”
JIVE: “He needs to focus on his opponents right now.”
GHEORGHE: “Hoff back in the corner … and Jack just tagged him in!”
JIVE: “Jason Payne getting up now .. and he didn’t see the tag! He’s heading towards Jack.. he has him by the hair!”
GHEORGHE: “Hoff from behind and spins the Dog of War around .. and there’s a few shots to the jaw .. and the boo.. no! Jason Payne grabbing the leg…….. BUT HOFF WITH THE ENZIGUIRI RIGHT INTO THE BACK OF THE HEAD!”
JIVE: “The World Tag Team champions have been getting the upperhand on the Dogs of War so far tonight …”
GHEORGHE: “Hoff back on his feet … against the far ropes…”
JIVE: “ROPE DOWN!”
GHEORGHE: “SHAWN HART! The World Heavyweight champion grabbed the top rope and pulled it down … and Hoff went flipping out of the ring!”
JIVE: “Hart now whistling innocently!”
GHEORGHE: “The World Heavyweight champion hasn’t been in the ring, but his mark has been made on this match!”
JIVE: “Jack on the outside yelling at the referee .. but there’s nothing he can do!”
GHEORGHE: “Hoff lying on the outside of the ring … and he took quite the tumble.”
JIVE: “The World Heavyweight champion calling to Jason Payne.. I think he wants in now!”
GHEORGHE: “Payne slowly getting to his feet … and he’s making his way to the corner! And there’s the tag!”
JIVE: “Hart choosing his spot .. and he couldn’t have chosen a better time.”
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart grabbing the top rope ….. AND HE FLINGS HIMSELF OVER THE TOP ROPE ONTO HOFF ON THE ARENA FLOOR!!!”
JIVE: “Hoff needs to make the tag now!”
GHEORGHE: “Well that’ll be hard to do from the arena floor…”
JIVE: “Hoff needs to get to a vertical base … but with the World Heavyweight champion crushing you from inside the ring .. no chance he’ll do it now.”
GHEORGHE: “Hart up on the outside and he grabs Hoff … Hart slamming Hoff’s head into the ring apron and finally rolls him into the ring!”
JIVE: “The World Heavyweight champion following in after … and he is on his feet stomping away at one half of the World Tag Team champions.”
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart now scraping Hoff off the mat .. and what a kick! Hart nearly took off Hoff’s head!”
JIVE: “Right on the bridge of the nose.. Hoff is seeing stars.”
GHEORGHE: “The champ grabbing Hoff sending him into the ropes … Hoff comes back .. Hart with his head down, AND HOFF WITH A SWINGING NECKBREAKER!”
JIVE: “That was a desperation move … I don’t even think Hoff was aware of what he was doing!”
GHEORGHE: “The World Heavyweight champion on his back … Hoff on his… and the fans are on their feet!”
JIVE: “Jack stomping on the mat trying to cheer his partner on .. but Hoff looks out of it, Gheorghe.”
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart is starting to move!”
JIVE: “The Champ is getting to his feet!”
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart holding the back of his neck as he stands straight … and he measures up Hoff and drives the elbow into the chest! Hart with a nonchalant cover.. ONE …….. TWO ...... TH--NO!”
JIVE: “Jack was halfway through those ropes just in case..”
GHEORGHE: “The referee warning Jack to stay in his corner … and Hart up and gives him a wink!”
JIVE: “Hart is a master of ring psychology … and knowing Jack, he’ll fall prey to it every time!”
GHEORGHE: “Hoff trying to make a move now .. he flips on his stomach and starts to crawl to his corner… but Shawn Hart grabs the leg! The World Heavyweight champion with both legs now … and pulls him into the center of the ring!”
JIVE: “Looks like Jack will have to wait just a bit longer.”
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart with the arm pulls Hoff to his feet … quick elbow doubles over his opponent … AND SHAWN HART WITH THE SIDE BACKBREAKER! There’s the cover... ONE ……. TW… no Hoff shoots the arm up!”
JIVE: “How the hell did he get the arm up so quickly?!”
GHEORGHE: “Hoff is an incredibly talented wrestler, Nick.. he didn’t just wake up one morning one half of the World Tag Team champions.”
JIVE: “He beat Cameron Cruise … OF COURSE HE DID.”
GHEORGHE: “You’re impossible.”
JIVE: “What?”
GHEORGHE: “Hart keeping on the offensive … against the ropes and comes back with the elbow drop … BUT HOFF MOVES! HART HITS THE MAT HARD!”
JIVE: “Hart sitting up and holding his elbow, he could have dislocated it.”
GHEORGHE: “Hart shooting a look over at Hoff!”
JIVE: “I think the shit is about to hit the fan.”
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart to his feet .. AND HE DRIVES THE BOOT INTO THE SKULL OF HOFF! Hart yanking Hoff to his feet …. And starts pummeling him with that flurry of punches!”
JIVE: “Hoff’s head popping back and forth like a punching bag!”
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart sends Hoff into the ropes ….”
(SFX: HUGE POP!!)
GHEORGHE: “EL CODO EXPLOSIVO!!! HOFF GOES DOWN LIKE A SACK OF POTATOES!!”
JIVE: “Jack is in the ring!!”
GHEORGHE: “Hart dropped down for the cover … but Jack grabs him from behind!”
JIVE: “Here comes Payne and McMillan! Things are going downhill quickly!”
GHEORGHE: “The Dogs of War in the ring … and they grab Jack! Payne holding him … and McMillan with the right hook….”
(SFX: Pop!)
JIVE: “Jack broke out at the last second! McMillan just popped Payne in the jaw!”
GHEORGHE: “Jack against the far ropes… AND HE CHARGES AT THE DOGS OF WAR!”
(SFX: HUGE POP!)
GHEORGHE: “JACK WITH THE FLYING CROSSBODY AND ALL THREE MEN GO OVER THE TOP ROPE!!”
JIVE: “But he left his partner in the ring with the World Heavyweight champion!”
GHEORGHE: “The Phenom looking to the outside at the mess .. and he picks up Hoff!”
JIVE: “Jack’s done it again! He’s going to cost the World Tag Team Champions another match!”
GHEORGHE: “The World Heavyweight champion grabbing Hoff from the mat …”
(SFX: HUGE POP!)
GHEORGHE: “HART ATTACK!! HOFF GOES DOWN!”
JIVE: “Hart is calling for the Fujiwara Armbar!! This match is over!”
GHEORGHE: “Hart … Hart has it locked on!! Hoff stuck in the middle of the ring with nowhere to go!”
JIVE: “The fans drowning out the referee as he asks Hoff if he wants to give in ….”
GHEORGHE: “WAIT A MINUTE!!!”
(SFX: Fans begin to jeer!!)
GHEORGHE: “GET HIM OUT OF HERE!!”
(The camera cuts to the ramp as we see “the Prophecy” Adrian Willard running to the ring, a chair in hand.)
GHEORGHE: “NO NO NO!”
(Willard slides underneath the bottom rope!)
JIVE: “Hart is completely oblivious!”
(SFX: CRACK~! IMMENSE JEERS!)
GHEORGHE: “WILLARD JUST CRACKED HART IN THE BACK OF THE SKULL WITH THE CHAIR!!”
JIVE: “He released the Fujiwara Armbar!”
(SFX: Bell rings. The fans continue jeering.)
GHEORGHE: “But Adrian Willard just cost Jack n’ Hoff the match!!”
JIVE: “Willard drops the chair .. and he is standing over the World Heavyweight champion! He has him all alone! Jack, Payne and McMillan are still on the arena floor!”
GHEORGHE: “Willard reaching into his pants…”
JIVE: “OH GOD .. HE’s PULLING A PETER FILE!”
GHEORGHE: “No, you idiot… Willard with a microphone … this is despicable … “the Prophecy” attacking the World Heavyweight champion from behind!”
(Willard’s eyes sparkle as he bends down to look Hart eye-to-eye.)
WILLARD: “The fact of the matter is this, ladies and gentlemen… Shawn Hart … Peter File … they are not athletes; they are not men. They, these broken, battered failures, are simply marketing devices. They are simply without… vision. They have no cause…”
(The fans continue to jeer as Willard stands up and walks to ropes facing the crowd.)
GHEORGHE: “Get him out of here… just get him out..”
JIVE: “Listen to the man, Gheorghe!”
GHEORGHE: “Any man who feels the need to attack the World Heavyweight champion when he has his back turned doesn’t deserve my attention.”
JIVE: “Blah, blah, blah.”
WILLARD: “I have a vision… I have had a vision, and it never ends. In fact, it is only growing stronger. Hart… (he shakes his head in disgust) this week… this is the second time you have been subjected to my motives … my path … my vision. This is simply the beginning.. and there are no detours. It’s been... envisioned…”
GHEORGHE: “The fans are giving Willard a piece of their minds right now …”
JIVE: “Willard is on a miss…”
(SFX: HUGE POP!!!)
GHEORGHE: “WAIT A MINUTE!! THAT’s CAMERON CRUISE!!! THE FORMER TELEVISION CHAMPION IS RUNNING TO THE RING!”
JIVE: “What the hell is he doing out here?!”
GHEORGHE: “Cruise slides into the ring …. AND HE GRABS THE CHAIR OFF THE MAT!!!”
JIVE: “No! Watch out Adrian!”
(SFX: CRACK~! POP POP POP!)
GHEORGHE: “AND CRUISE DRILLS WILLARD IN THE BACK WITH THE CHAIR!!! “The Prophecy” just went through the ropes and it serves him right!”
JIVE: “What a coward!! Attacking Willard while his back was turned!”
GHEORGHE: “Willard just did the same damn thing to the World Heavyweight champion!”
JIVE: “That’s DIFFERENT.”
GHEORGHE: “Cameron Cruise in the ring and he raises the chair up as Willard gets to his feet… and Adrian Willard does NOT look happy, Nick!”
JIVE: “He was just assaulted from behind by that nutjob!”
GHEORGHE: “The World Heavyweight champion is starting to move! Shawn Hart is up on his feet!”
JIVE: “And he is about to back right into Cruise!”
GHEORGHE: “Hart and Cruise bump back to back …They both spin around ….. OH GOD NO!! SHAWN HART WITH THE HART ATTACK ON CRUISE!!!”
JIVE: “Hahaha!!! He just laid out the very man who came to his rescue!”
GHEORGHE: “Shawn Hart rubbing his eyes.. and he sees Cruise … and now he looks out at Adrian Willard… and Willard just mouthed “thanks!”…. Willard hopping the guardrail … and Shawn Hart… he can’t believe it! He’s beside himself!”
JIVE: “Cameron Cruise got what he deserved.”
GHEORGHE: “Ladies and gentlemen .. we are out of time!! From everyone here at New ERA of Wrestling .. join us next RAUCOUS .. as we come to you from the Taco Bell Arena at Boise State University!”
JIVE: “Poor Cammy.. Poor, poor Cammy.”
LINKS: “The winners of this match … via disqualification ….”
(The camera focuses on Shawn Hart, who grabs the World Heavyweight championship and hops out of the ring. He walks backwards up the ramp looking at Cruise strewn out in the middle of the ring.)
LINKS: “The Dogs of War .. and SHAWN …. JESSICA ….. HART …. PEE AYCH DEE!”
(The crowd pops as Hart shakes his head, turns, and disappears through the curtain.)
( the end )
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