_{Are the Stars Aligning?}
^{Starring Dan Stein}

The camera, in fact, doesn't open. Stein is walking through the dance club, apparently with a purpose. Though he tries to walk around the dance floor, many of the women turn their gaze to him. Stein grabs a glass of champagne, puts his unlit cigar in his pocket, spinning himself around to smirk at the waitress, before walking up a flight of stairs, sipping down the glass quickly. As Stein makes his way to the top, he sets the empty glass down on the railing, before wiping his mouth with his hand and heading towards a door.

Not just any door. The owner of the club's office door. Stein knocks as he gets there, though he knows the music has drowned out his feeble attempt to enter. Stein opens the door slowly, peaking his head around the door to look inside. Inside is a man, two blonde women in tight dresses, and a television screen with ESPN running in the background. Dan walks further into the room, the man turning and looking at Stein with a smile on his face. He snaps his fingers, the two women quickly jump off his desk and walk out the door, shutting it softly.

Dan Stein: "So, I got the job at ICE."

The man's smile remains on his face, Stein smirks, rubbing his scruffy chin. The man sits back in his chair, and spins it, side to side, before speaking.

Unknown Man: "So, you're going to be able to pay me back, then?"

Stein nods, grinning.

Dan Stein: "Oh, yeah. There's no doubt in my mind that you'll have the rest of your money by the end of the year."

The man sighs, leaning forward, stopping the chair.

Unknown Man: "Ugh, the end of the year? That's so long away..."

Stein looks at the man, chuckling.

Dan Stein: "I'm sorry, man. I mean, I know I owe ya the cash and all, but... I'll give it to you as soon as I can. I should be making a lot of winners pay here. A couple of the guys don't look like much, and their biggest draw is a guy who calls himself Ice. Honestly. Swear to God."

The man chuckled. Stein grinned.

Unknown Man: "Well, then... maybe I have a new deal for you..."

Stein looks at the man, as the light bulb clicks off in his head. Stein reaches into his shirt pocket, and drops a wad of cash on his desk. He stands up, looks at the man, and speaks.

Dan Stein: "I'll be right back, Johnny."

As Stein turns around and walks towards the door, 'Johnny' picks up the wad of cash and thumbs through it.

The camera opens up on Stein, standing in the club with the dance floor behind him. He smirks to the camera, a smirk which never seems to leave his face anyways, and puts his hands down against the railing. Although the music should be distracting from the promo Stein's about to cut, he a small microphone on his shirt, which only picks up noise originating from within three feet. Stein looks around the club, quickly, before beginning to speak.

The Lights: "So, my first match in ICE is a six man tag match. Not just any tag match, but a match with so much extra baggage, even the Chicago Cubs aren't blaming me for thinking this sucks."

He smirks, bringing up the fact that the team he loves to hate, the Chicago Cubs, haven't won a World Series in around 90 years.

The Lights: "My tag partners, for one. I've got Gangster McTupac and Negative Nancy adding some interesting chemistry to the team. Don't get me wrong, Jayson, I have NO doubt you'll curb stomp a bitch in the face, what so ever. You look like you bench press a Cadillac, I'm not going to doubt anything about you. I'm just saying I've never worked with a guy from the hood. I'm a 20 year old Iowan farm boy, for fuck's sake. I hadn't seen an African-American in person until my first Hawkeye game. And from what I hear, half the guys that claim they're 'hood', aren't. This match? This is your chance to prove to me, and the world, that you are as much of a bad ass as your reputation makes you sound."

Stein grimaces a little, then shakes his head.

The Lights: "Then, to add more fun, our partner, Traci Johnson, was on Boiling Point announcing to the world that she thinks she sucks and can't win anything to save her life. The only thing she's got telling her she can wrestle her way out of a condom is Dick Steele, which, by the way, is the most amazing name... ever (ever). Not only is she a woman. Not only is she giving up weight on everyone, not only is she giving up strength on everyone, she's doubting herself and wishing she was back managing. Dick whipped by her brother, Traci doesn't have SHIT going for her, except for the fact that Rhino and myself are there holding her hair when she's vomiting self-doubt like a bad bottle of tequila. I haven't seen SHIT from this woman, but I know for a fact she wouldn't be here if she didn't have SOME skill. So, Traci, get your head out of your vagina and get your game face on. I'm not about to lose this match because of a five foot six inch, buck-fifty bimbo couldn't hold up her part of the show."

Stein smirked, shaking his head.

The Lights: "But don't let my bitching confuse you with jaw-jacking. I'm not going to fuck this up for you guys, you guys don't fuck this up for me, and I'll be happy. We'll be cool... and I'll continue on my way for the Alias Championship. Because that, my lovely tag partners, is what this match is about, whether or not the title is on the line. Look across the ring from us. Look at the names. Fusion, who won the first Alias League match at Boiling Point, Faith, who lost to Fusion, and Kenji Yamada, and all the shit I know he's done in his life."

Stein nods, grinning wide.

The Lights: "I'm not going to go too deep into what I know about you, Kenji. You know I was in OPW with you, I've seen your demons. Now you're dick-deep in a pill bottle hoping to 'send the pain below', but all that shit is doing to you is making you talk to stars and think your hand is some kind of Holy word or some shit. Your legs work like FDR's, and you think you can keep up with me? With Dan Stein? I ran circles around able-bodied stars, including people you've wrestled and lost to. But because you're delusional, talking to inanimate objects, and worshipping the hair on your left over macaroni and cheese, I'm supposed to fear you? Why don't I throw you a bubble machine - fuck it. Why the fuck am I trying to make any sense to you. You couldn't understand Dr. Seuss, let alone a fucking human being insulting you. Then you go on about a shitty occurrence in my life, as if you killing one woman, nearly killing another, and blaming everyone but YOURSELF about the death of your pseudo-child isn't as much of a mind fuck as bringing up my mom. I've dealt with it, I lost one of the only women I've ever loved. You should go back further, to where I lost my father because of wrestling, Kenji. Go back further, Kenji. Go back to where I won the Sky High Invitational Cup. Go back to where you were called out by Jonny Johnson, where he threatened to call the police on you if you didn't lose a match to him... Ah, you think you have me scouted out, Gimp-man. Just because you're too doped up on shit to remember ANYTHING doesn't mean I haven't accomplished shit in my career."

Stein sighs, realizing he's continuing on about Kenji.

The Lights: "So, then we have Fusion and Faith. Faith and Fusion. Faith and Cody. Faith and her bisexual tendencies. Faith and some guy named Cody who's about as timid as the guys the first week of VH1's TV show 'Pickup Artist'. But how does that make me better than her, how does that shit mean that I'm going to walk in there, Jayson and Traci at toe, smack Kenji around with a dead fish, Fusion with a roll of tin foil and Faith with a Charisma Stick? Because the bitch couldn't keep a thirteen year old boys attention if she was nude, on a bed, eating a fudge popsicle while watching the last episode of Taxi Cab Confessions. How the shit is a woman with tits that big going to annoy a 12 year old, and expect to out wrestle ME? Even Negative Nancy makes me feel like she's worth a damn; I've seen Faith wrestle and I know she's boring as fuck."

Stein shook his head, realizing he's still yet to speak about Fusion. He rubs his temples, briefly, before continuing on.

The Lights: "But this guy... this... Fusion guy. Man, this r-tard takes the cake in Team Ridiculous. Kenji can't hold a conversation with a human being, Faith can't hold a nymphomaniac's attention, and Fusion can't bare to break a single stereotype about the super-heel. He bitches, he moans. He complains about signing autographs to make money. The fairie fuck can't even appreciate the fucking fans that gave him a job. No. This guy's so hardcore on himself, there's rumors he's been seen jerking off to the image in the mirror. Rumors, though. Pure rumors. Sure, you've beaten Faith already, but she's been beaten more than she's been eaten, and that bisexual piece of eye candy gets around; I'm sure of that. Now you're teaming with her. A woman you're pissed at for making you money, you're teaming with. Congratulations, Fusion. How's that for some Karma. Get pissed at a fucking BABY about puking on your shirt, and now you're wrestling with the bitch that put you there. What goes around, comes around, eh, chico?"

Stein's eyes light up as he asks the question.

The Lights: "ThrowDown 101. That's not a freshman-level class, that's the start of a new era. That's the start of a new generation, ICE. And I'm here to lead the revolution. Out of the recent hirings, I am the only mother fucker with a sense of Super-stardom. I know what it takes to get this shit done, and I will do EVERYTHING in my power to get my team the win. Jayson, Traci, look at me. Look at me as your team's Captain. Look at me as your leader."

Stein smirks.

The Lights: "Might as well start now. Lord knows I'll be the leader of the Alias division for some time to come. Not because you all suck, not because I'm bett... okay, it is because I'm better than all of you. Kenji's got a pimp-gimp worse than Sugar-bear. Faith's tits make her fall to her face faster than a dozen roses, and Fusion can't stop primping himself with a mirror to realize he's a fucking man, in the wrestling division, not a bitch in a beauty pageant. Guy can't get over himself  long enough to make a difference in his own shorts. Black Rhino's going to be selling crack to Dick Steele, Traci's going to make her way back down the ladder and behind her brother, and I'll be left looking around at the worthless ass clowns trying to scratch and claw for MY Alias Title."

Stein grins.

The Lights: "So, please. Kenji, keep this 'oh, my legs hurt' bit up. Fusion, and Faith, you beat each other up from the inside out, please. Less work for me. While Kenji's going back to his roots, and Fusion and Faith are tearing at each other like a fucking married couple, Traci, Jayson and I are going to be continuing up the ladder. And before Team Fuck Up can realize it?"

Stein smirks.

The Lights: "It's Lights Out for the Alias division."

The camera shuts off, almost abruptly. Stein grabs the microphone off of his shirt, and hands it back to the cameraman, who scurries away shortly there after. Stein turns around, leaning back against the railing he just ranted to. He crosses his hands over his stomach, his feet at the ankles, and watches the women pass him. A redhead passes him, glancing over her shoulder at him. Their eyes connect, and Stein stands up.

Dan Stein: "A redhead? I love redheads..."

Stein smirks, and trails after the woman, slowly...

Johnny: "So, you think you're going to take care of this place, huh?"

Stein now sits in Johnny's office again. He has another glass of champagne in his hand, and takes a sip before smirking, nodding.

Dan Stein: "Absolutely."

Johnny: "Good... I have an idea, then."

Dan Stein: "Let me hear it, Johnny."

The two men look at each other, Johnny sits back in his chair with a cigar in his mouth. Stein grabs his cigar from his pocket, before putting it in his mouth. Johnny takes his cigar out of his mouth.

Johnny: "You guaranty me a win, I make a bet. You win, I make money. You lose, you owe me the rest of the money, plus the money I spent on betting on you."

Stein looks at Johnny, nodding. He smirks, and finally speaks.

Dan Stein: "Johnny... place your bet. I've got this one locked up."

Stein leans back in his chair, pulling the cigar out of his mouth as the two women walk back into the room. Both men smirk at each other, a mutual sign of a deal.