It's faith that's brought me to where I am today. It's faith that has always stood by my side, strengthened me to fight forward and to get as far as I possible can. Faith was there for me when I beat Jimmy Jett. Faith was there for me when I went against impossible odds when I fought Steve Sharp.

Faith has always been there, and it always will be.

It was faith that helped me fight through the terrible loss of Crystal to finally finding love in Suki Minamoto. Faith is what has inspired me to finally decide on telling her how I feel. Faith is what will guide me to my next world title shot, and faith will slowly help me restore my status in the HWF.

It's going to be a long journey, but I'm ready for the struggle. I've kept up faith nearly all of my life, losing it only when I've lost myself. During those troubled times I was a completely different person, cold and uncaring to the world around him. If I go back to that, then I fear for my very life. Faith is something that I simply can't NOT have.

Without it, I find it hard to find determination. Without it, I find it impossible to fight forward. Without faith...I can only run by emotion.

And while emotion is a good replacement, it's always best to have the two fight in tandem. My faith and my love, my inspiration and determination, my hope and my desire.

And yet I still feel the fear, day by day the two rage wars within my mind. It's as though Faith's Army and the minions of fear cannot settle their disputes anywhere but my very mind. The turmoil which rages on within it is enough to drive most people crazy, but I suppose after everything I've been through it's something that I'm used to by now.

Faith tells me I will win on Suicide. Faith tells me I can beat Ian and Remi. Faith tells me that one day, somehow, I will become the HWF world heavyweight champion.

Fear tells me it's hopeless. Fear tells me Ian and Remi will massacre me. Fear tells me I will never ammount to anything, and the very thought of me getting another shot is laughable.

The never-ending debate within my mind between the two leaves me high strung, it leaves me confused and tired. All these what if's, all these maybe's...what does it all mean? In the grand scheme of things, would it even matter if I can overcome my fears? Faith has never left me, but fear I can live without. If I conquer my fears and there are none left, what does faith have left to do but to sit there and comfort me until the next fear comes along?

With every fear conquered another will come, it's like the rise and fall of the sun day-by-day. There's no escaping the fact that I will never be able to escape fear. There's no denying the fact that I can't deny being afraid each day.

Ian would like me to believe that there is no ammount of faith within me that could bring me to victory this coming Monday. Remi might wish that I lose faith in the very idea that I'll win at all.

Both of them probably want to instill some sort of fear in me, both of them probably wish for me to falter and fall to said fear.

Well guess what boys, I'm all ready afraid. As a matter of fact, I'll be the first to admit that fear is an everyday thing for me. I can't escape it, and I can't stop it. But I can fight it with faith, and that's what I've always done.

Still...the fear will always be there. The fear will always stay by my side, much as faith only with a darker intent. I fear alot of things, I'll admit that. I can't say that I'll ever be able to stop experiencing fear.

But if there's one thing I can say it's this, I'll never fear either of you.