act three: remnant of the past
That night... I set myself up to gain, or lose, everything important to me.
That night... I made certain that everything went exactly as it was supposed to.
That night... I did my absolute best to maintain composure, stay strong for my friends, my colleagues, but more than anything, for her.
That night... Remnant was born.
"And that, ladies and gentlemen... was the night that Remnant was born... but that's just another story for another time, isn't it?"
The time is now.
"So... you're really going through with this."
The days had passed faster than I'd expected them to, to be certain... a part of me wanted to push things back, delay the inevitable, even though I knew that to do so would be to give up on everything I'd dreamed of doing. When she spoke those words to me, there was something in her voice that ran shivvers down my spine, made me desperately want to tell her that no, I wasn't going through with it, that I couldn't risk hurting myself and I'd stay by her side.
I was afraid, I'll admit that here and now. I knew we were well off, that we could live happily and give our kids a happy life... to be truthful, I could have stopped everything whenever I wanted to, even despite the fact that the plan I'd concocted had already swung into full motion. Yet when I thought of how we were going to handle ourselves should the economy take a turn for the worst, when I put together all the variables of what could happen... I began to realize that I couldn't expect to live off the money I'd saved forever.
I'd played everything safe, used my mind to the best of my ability and made certain that there would be money there for Suki, myself and our family for the rest of our lives... but those variables spoke to me, those variables reminded me that anything could happen. At that point, I felt so trapped... like I'd not completely thought things through. I backtracked, I went over my plans word for word, all the while questioning everything I'd done up to that point. My confidence in our success was never staggered, though... it was simply my confidence in what I'd had planned. Yet, through that, a part of me spoke out inside, fighting through all the panic in my mind. A still-small voice to call out through the worry that had began to consume my mind.
That still-small voice told me to keep moving forward.
So I did. I stopped second-guessing myself, I stuck to the plans I'd laid out all those months ago... and everything started falling into place. My confrontation with Champion at our retirement party had given my confidence, and though I'd questioned my planning it was the simple act of watching things fall into place that restored my confidence there as well. I had made my mistakes while NLCW, and despite all my soul-searching and all the efforts I'd made to accomplish my dreams in the time I'd had there... there was still so much left that I'd missed out on.
My last chance at redemption was inside of those plans of mine, and I didn't plan to let those mistakes lie on the canvas of my past and stain it into something I'd never meant for it to be.
"I have no choice," I'd told her honestly, reluctantly looking her in her emotion-torn eyes. I remember the questions floating in those eyes, I remember her seemingly wanting to just reach out and hold me in some hope that I might change my mind. Truth be told, had she pressed hard enough... I probably would have. "They need me, babe, they need all the help they can get."
At the time, the NLCW had been under siege by Dillon Durst and his rag-tag group of thugs... another day in the life of the company, essentially. When I'd first heard of the ordeal I couldn't help but role my eyes at yet another "NLCW versus" episode in the company's history, and I'd brushed it off as just another attack in a long line of attacks the company had endured. Yet when I began to see the things that Durst was doing, the actions he was taking and the level of desperation for success that he'd reached... I realized just how dangerous things had truly become.
I realized that this was my chance to put my plans into action, and make up for one of the mistakes I'd made when I left things behind in the NLCW. See, for me... it wasn't all about the titles I'd skipped past, or the people I'd never faced, or the events I'd never taken part in.
It was about the trash I'd forgotten to take out when I left home.
The signs of trouble were so obvious-- even back before Champion and I had faced off in the match that ended our careers-- and Durst's plans hadn't even came to surface yet at the time. Fact of the matter is, there's an atmospheric change when a plan comes together in the NLCW, regardless of what kind-of plan it may be. The locker-rooms feel the change, the workers start working that little bit harder to get things out of the way as quick as possible... everything starts to change in preparation for things to come.
Yet I was so focused on everything else that I never thought to look into the signs, I never thought to prepare for a battle that was going to have to happen eventually.
With my name out of the business for the time being and with my retirement having only just begun, it almost seemed to me as if my stepping back into the ring so soon would have an adverse effect on the plans I'd made. If I was going to take on this demon of my past, if I was going to make an impact on the company that helped build me into who I was to be... I'd have to put myself in hiding for awhile, fighting from the shadows.
When the night came that the next portion of my plans were to be put into action, I knew what I'd have to do. I'd have to completely emerse myself in those shadows, cover my tracks and make sure that no-one involved with the company other than those necessary would be in on my identity. Everything was going to be systematic, a clean and easy execution of those plans of mine so that the ball could get rolling on letting me back in to protect the place I loved so much. Yet despite all my motivation... when I found myself standing out on the street, standing in front of the woman I loved with all my life, I knew that if she asked me-- if she honest-to-God asked me with sincerity that she did not want me to leave-- I wouldn't leave.
Imagine my relief when she offered me that beautiful smile of hers instead, giving me a realization of her understanding.
"You be careful, you hear me?" she said softly, reaching out to place her hand on my chest and clutch at my shirt gently, her eyes locking with mine. There was so much emotion in her voice that it almost overwhelmed me, and it made me remember just how much was at stake with all those plans of mine. Yet above the pain that was there for my departure, there was a confidence that helped fuel my motivation, "You give them all the hell you can, but you be careful coming home."
There was just no way I could have ever possibly done anything to deserve someone so perfect as her. I remember being amazed by her strength, by her determination in that belief she held in me, that trust she had that I would get the job done. I couldn't help it, I reached out to stroke the side of her face and close my own eyes. A part of me told me that she'd need my comfort, but... I realized that, in all reality, it was me that needed comforting.
Funny thing about that was, just her presence alone was comfort enough for all the anxiety I was feeling on that night, and it was ultimately her blessing that pushed me forward into the battles that laid ahead of me.
"This is war, hun, there's nothing careful about it. Chances are, I won't be comin' back so easy."
I was ready to acknowledge the struggles in front of me, ready to give in to the fact that I'd fallen out of the game for a little bit too long to truly be comfortable back in the ring. Despite all the preparations I'd made, despite all the training I'd been doing... there was still that part to my mind that was quick to remind me of the reality of the situation before me. Struggles were going to take place, problems were going to happen, and I wasn't going to just breeze through these plans without a great deal of effort.
I thought, at the time, I was just being realistic.
Apparently, she didn't agree with me.
"You and I both know that's a load of bullshit."
That voice inside of me shut up right then and there, and I remember cringing at the sting of her harsh words. A thousand questions began to circulate my mind but above all else her voice stood out to me, that confident voice that spoke of her faith in my abilities, that voice that told me I could get through it all without a struggle if I just believed in what I was doing with all I had in me. That realistic side to me was nothing more than the old man of my mind trying to slow things down when the still-young buck within me was ready for another fight, and it took my angel's words to silence that old man for good.
She knew that I would agree with her before the words had even left her lips, and she knew that I would because she knew that I needed to hear her say something like that in order to remember another part of me I'd lost along the way. See, at the time... it was taking everyone around me to help get me back to the man I knew I was supposed to be, because during all that planning I'd somehow forgotten parts of who I was.
Funny thing is, I think there's still parts of me missing even today.
Still, I've came a long way since back then. That's for damn certain.
"Yeah, I guess it is."
"You've trained too hard, and you know it. After everything that's came your way, you really think a few punks like them can keep you down? That they can keep everyone in there down? They're nothing."
Nothing to be trifled with, but nothing to be worried over either. The NLCW had put together a coalition to fight the odds against it, and it was going to bring me on-board as it's trump card against the stacked forces coming after it. Every word she spoke was the truth and it was a truth I'd been failing to realize for too long by that point, and so when it all finally came to a realization for me... well, let's just say what little confidence was missing in this heart of mine had been restored entirely.
I felt fit to take on the world because of her, and I was ready to do so.
"I know, hun. I know."
I told her this with a sense of satisfaction as I did so, because I could say it with all the honesty within me and I could feel the truth in those words to my very core. The old man of my mind had fallen asleep at his wheel, finally, and all the things that had been slowing me down before seemed to just... well, fade away.
With the hour growing late and with so much left to be done, I'd been ready to cut the conversation short so that I could get going. The fact was, too, that our long goodbye was still getting to me despite the strength I'd taken on throughout the course of it. Yet just as I was about to speak my part, it was her who once again spoke for me, and to a part of me that needed to hear her words.
"Get going, you've got a long night ahead of you."
The last remnants of Dominic Pericolo would be left with those very words, ushered off into the shadows where he needed to be. I remember grinning like a madman at her words, a rush of joy overtaking me as I pulled her in and kissed her passionately, knowing that although it would be the last time for some time until I could do such a thing again, because of her I'd be able to take it without losing strength along the way.
Finally, the exchange that was meant to be made during our encounter was made in our embrace. A dark, flowing object passed from her hands into mine, and as we parted ways from one another that disembodied face she'd given me did hang limply from my hand. It had all happened so quickly, from the transaction being made to the end of our embrace, to her slowly walking away from me and into the shadows of the night. I remember the look in her eyes as she walked away from me, just before those shadows overtook her.
"I love you." she spoke to me simply, such power in those words and just as much power in her eyes, all traces of sorrow seemingly wiped away by a mix of confidence and pride emanating from her eyes.
She believed in me. More than anything else in this physical world of ours, she believed in me and my ability.
"Love you too."
As her shadows faded I took that mask in my hand and I lifted it up to look it in the eyes. Those eyes would soon be my own, and I felt the need to study the look of the person I was about to become.
At the time I hated that person, the person I would have to be. I hated it because it meant hiding in those shadows, it meant lying to everyone who trusted me in those lies... it meant changing the person I was in order to better myself in the end. To this day, I'm still not all too fond of the person I had to be for all that time, but the end bonus was that I found a way to work around even that, too.
The fact still remained that she believed in me and, to me, that was all the strength I needed to endure. When that mask covered my face, when I finally fell entirely into the shadows... it was because of her that I was still able to hold on to who I was throughout it.
He wasn't what I'd expected him to be, and he certainly wasn't as ruthless as perhaps he would have liked to have been, but Remnant would inevitably become a mixture of both my personality and the personality I'd created for him... and it would work out better for me in the end.
Still, when it came for me to take Remnant to the ring... there was one other person I knew I'd need to talk to.