act twelve: observing the heavens
I stare up at the heavens above, the gentle shimmer of the stars in the sky strangely bringing me comfort, though they come as a reminder to some of just how small this planet of ours truly is. Their humbling presence above us all, almost mocking us in our miniscule daily ordeals... it's funny to think that should those stars be sentient, they would see the drama of human existence as something so small, so insignificant... almost microscopic, even. Indeed, the worries of our people only rival the size of those very stars in our own minds, sometimes even eclipsing them and dominating the entirety of our own individual universes. When the night falls and the worries of the day fade with the setting sun, the burdens of the coming morning start to creep in to fill their place, and the cycle begins anew for so many of us that it drags us down from day to day.
A single black cloud rolls across the screen of the sky, blocking out the light of the stars from that patch of the heavens and arching a single, foggy arm out, seemingly across the cosmos itself in an effort to reach the moon and block its light as well. The cloud is alone in its efforts, marring what would otherwise be a pleasently clear night sky as it struggles to cover up what it can. Almost like a jealous guardian to the beauty of the heavens, the cloud works tirelessly in its journey overhead, never resting, always covering the view of something just past its reach. Still, such a silly notion... putting sentient thinking into stars and clouds, it's fun to think on but ultimately strange to write home about, wouldn't you say?
I can hear quiet footsteps echo down the hall of my home, the mother of my child and the love of my life carefully caring for our beloved son. She's likely on her way to rock him back to sleep, or to feed him and quiet his soft cries of discomfort and hunger. Whatever the reason, she's going for him... his crying would probably cease rather quickly, the comfort that radiates from her is apparent to anyone happening to be around her, it's an effect she just seems to have on people, and an effect that had drawn me into her a long, long time ago.
On this night I've much to think about, only days away from facing a man that at one time I'd beaten fairly easily. A man who'd pushed me to my limits, something I'd not felt in quite some time, when he'd put me-- and I, him-- our of commission for an entire week due to the injuries we'd sustained from our altercation with each other. His name is Paul York, and he almost seems to be, to me, a disturbingly grim mirror-image of myself. There was a time in my past when I'd strayed from the road that brought me to where I am today, and onto a road that left me bitter and conceited, jealous and enraged... I was blaming everyone for my failures except for myself, and I was acting far too irrationally to realize the hole I'd been digging myself into.
If I'd continued on that path... I can't help but wonder, would I have ended up like him? Would I have ended up like Paul York? He's a man covered by the scars of violence, a man who lacks compassion for others and who isn't in the business for the love of it, but for self gain and seemingly for the pain he can bring to others, and the feeling of power that probably gives him. Would I have become addicted to that, could that have been a path I'd have followed? It all seems so surreal to me, thinking back on the man I once had let myself become... thinking of how close I'd came to losing it all.
I had a very special, very loyal, very old friend of mine to thank for steering me back on the right path. My wife had set the gears in motion for me to be receptive to what he had to say to me, and when his work was done... I'd found a new place to call home, and a new life worth fighting for. Suki was my guardian angel during those days, the one who'd carefully nurse me back to the man I used to be... but Christopher Champion? He was the one who put me back on the right path. He was the one that brought me to the NLCW.
A light plays out across the heavens above, piercing past the blockade set up by the cloud floating by, escaping its grasp and eventually fading from sight. A shooting star, something seemingly so rare to catch and so magical to behold. I close my eyes and the darkness that comes with it is almost startling... a lifetime of having to stare at the back of my lids before falling asleep should have made me used to the sight, but somehow things felt... different. One moment I'd been appreciating the entirely different world above me, and the next I'd created this new world of darkness to behold. Maybe that was as simple a comparison between the two paths as could be made. Maybe it really did come down to staring up at the heavens, or glancing down into darkness.
Where I lifted my head back up again, Paul York may have lowered his own.
I'd heard the news, of course... Paul York wasn't the only concern I had. Granted, the first person to bring me true, physical harm since my return was of course playing a big part in my mind... but York was somehow not my primary train of thought. Nor was my thinking directed to a newfound friend and former partner of mine suddenly deciding his calling in life would have to leave him elsewhere, leaving the burden of our once shared titles to rest solely on my own shoulders. No... his sudden change of heart was an important thing I'd been mulling over on, but it was not the most important, either.
Instead, it was my struggling home away from home, and a place that had built me into the position I'm in today. It was this damn recession, and the issues of the world that seems to effect us all. It was the drama they brought that would otherwise seem so strange and so miniscule to those stars in the heavens, yet so very earth-crushingly real to the rest of us all. I'd managed to avoid being affected by it all for all this time, and while I knew my family and I could easily weather the storm and make it out exactly as we'd dreamed to-- if not, perhaps, even beyond those dreams-- I was still concerned. Not for me, nor my family, but for my other family... that struggling home away from home. For the NLCW.
"I knew there was a reason I'd make myself a free agent... I just hoped it wouldn't be for something like this." I find myself saying out loud to no-one in particular, or perhaps if no-one else than to those same stars who sat on high. The words were true, of course, plucked straight from my mind and made to spoken tongue. It was becomming quickly apparent to me that the NLCW was struggling through the economic downturn, and with more and more of our roster dwindling, it was starting to become a real concern as to whether or not the place could hold up.
I'd returned to the NLCW to finish my story, and to close a chapter in my life I'd hoped would end as happily as possible. Now, I realize that that may not be a possibility, should these times persist as they are... and what once I'd hoped would be a leisurely stroll back through the ranks of the place I've called home for so very long now, may instead have to turn into a sprint to the finish line. The fact of the matter is, it felt to me that my time was quickly running out to fix the Hardcore Division as it was, and with the company I love slowly turning to ashes before my eyes... what other choice did I have but to cash in the one thing that would allow me to try and take the reigns?
I always knew I'd win the Sultan of the Squared Circle, losing was never a consideration for me in my planning. To be honest, it had never been up until Paul York managed to force a draw out of me in a match not even I had expected to turn to such brutality. Suddenly, with York's shot to my head in our last encounter, I'd somehow been made clear to exactly what kind-of risks were going on before me, risks I'd not thought to count into my master planning. I still knew where I was headed for after all of that was said and done, and even now I know my likelihood of failure is at an incredible low... but, as I said, it's not an individual that I'm concerned for.
Instead, it's my home. It's the NLCW.
As much as I am certain that I can get back to where I want to be without having to worry about someone like York stopping me along the path, there is always the chance that the path itself might crumble and fade, leaving darkness in place of the once beautiful heavens I'd been carving a path through, and leaving me alone to create an entirely new path in its place. It wasn't exactly something I'd planned to see happen, but it was something that now I realize I'll have to consider, and something that could very, very easily become a problem for me in these attempts I've been making to recapture that old dream of mine, and end my final chapter on the note I'd always wanted to.
Without the NLCW... I'm left to wander, and while I've always considered myself something of a "Wandering Samurai", as it were, I've always remained loyal to the company that helped make me. I'd always hoped that, when I was ready to finish this story of mine, I'd be able to do it with them, together. I guess I just never realized the potential for the place to suffer so heavily that those chances may become impossible. It's nothing to give up hope over, after-all... but it's something to quicken my pace over, and that's for certain.
No more draws, and no more slow travels... I guess the time for star-gazing has came to its end. If I'm to make it to this moon I see before me, and to the prize I've been waiting to reclaim since my return... I suppose it's time I stop walking through the heavens, and start tearing through them like the shooting star from before. After-all, it's only a matter of time, it seems, before that jealous black cloud takes the moon from me and erases all hope I've had of finishing this story within the comfort of my home. If the NLCW is truly in danger of falling... the least that I can do is try to take the reigns and lead it in the right direction.
Still... I'm almost afraid my efforts may be a bit too late.