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4 Year Reunion

EZieba

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[updated:LAST EDITED ON Jul-31-02 AT 01:34 PM (EDT)]OORP: And yes I DID get the OK to use 'Iceman' Steve Radder in this RP ... SO THERE! :)

AND THIS ...

IS ...

JEOPARDY!!!

(Cue the Jeopardy music ... or what it seems. As the camera pans left it sees two midgets, Gradeus and E-5, playing the theme to Jeopardy on kazoos while the studio audience is roaring it up because tonight ... is Celebrity Jeopardy! As the camera switches scenes with another the shot then shows Alex Trebek walking out to the stage and taking his place behind the podium.)

AT: Welcome to Celebrity Jeopardy. Tonight we are on location in Sweetwater, Texas right on the eve of CSWA's grand Pay Per View Fish Fund! Tonight, as it was some four years ago, we will have guest from the CSWA come onto the show and win money for their favorite charities. Before we start let's introduce you to the people who will be playing tonight.

(As Trebek goes over towards the contestants he begins to recognize the three standing around.)

AT: What? You three again? I didn't even know you three were still around.

SR: Shows how much you watch the show. And you call yourself Canadian.

KP: Hey ... take off you hoser eh? I'm all a'boot him not knowing. Makes life interesting.

SR: Would you PLEASE stop with all the corny Canadian accent comments! It only makes you look like your usual lush ass self.

KP: Don't you have a smile to find Ice Princess?

AT: Alright stop it you two! I was told earlier that contracts were signed to make sure there was no fighting on this show so I expect you to respect them.

KP: Respect? Hey ... THERE'S something Ivy lacks!

SR: Oh sure talk about her when she isn't around. Can you be any MORE scared of her?

KP: Quit humpin' her leg.

AT: ALRIGHT STOP ALREADY! Steve who are you playing for today.

SR: I believe you should introduce me to the fans out there Alex.

KP: Yeah ... before he disappears again and we don't see him for another six months which, by the way, is the normal time in-between CSWA shows.

SR: YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTH!

KP: Get a life.

SR: Get a clue.

KP: Get a pair.

SR: Get a bottle.

AT: STOP ALREADY! Okay, for those of you who don't know who this man is ... he is 'Iceman' Steve Radder. So what brings you on today's show Steve.

SR: Well Alex, before I go on and name my charity I just want to say I am a FORMER CSWA World Champion, but (cough cough) some of us can't say that now can we?

(The camera cuts back to Powers who quickly hides the bottle)

KP: I'm sorry did you say something? I know you was busy choking on something, but I don't see Alex smiling and all and ...

AT: THIS IS A FAMILY SHOW KEVIN!

KP: Untie the panties Alex ... geez.

SR: (AHEM) Before I was so rudely interrupted by Sir Lush-n-Choke I would like to say that I'm playing for The Society for Women Seeking Breast Augmentation.

AT: Um ... okay ... well next up we've got ...

(As Alex moves down to the next podium the only thing he sees there is a cardboard cut out of 'Hurricane' Eddy Love.)

AT: What the Hell? Who did this!

(At the same time both Radder and Powers are laughing about the prank they've pulled.)

SR: Well Love couldn't make it so we had to find someone who was best suited to take his place.

KP: And, since nobody else could hold a candle to Love ... well except Deville and Benson, but they're too busy playing tug-a-war with his jock right now ... we've got this cut out with the BEST of Eddy Love comments! Ask'em who he's playing for.

AT: I'm almost afraid. (looking at the cardboard cutout) Eddy who are you playing for?

(As 'Eddy' is speaking it is obvious that different speeches from his past are being edited and used.)

EL: I'm ... playing ... for ... the fair ... for all ... of my ... teddy bear!

AT: Wh ... What?

SR: Actually he's playing for The Sammy Benson Rehab Project.

KP: No he's playing for the Eddy Love Hairpiece Foundation.

SR: No it is the Rehab Project.

KP: Hairpiece Foundation.

SR: Rehab

KP: Hairpiece

SR: REHAB!

KP: HAIRPIECE!

AT: STOP IT! STOP IT NOW!

SR: Choke artist.

KP: Bird chest.

AT: I MEAN IT! Okay Kevin ... what are you playing for?

KP: Well Alex, since you forgot ... AGAIN ... my name is The Double G KP ... The Ayatollah of Rum and Cola ... The man who is TRULY US STEEL AND SEX APPEAL ... 'Good God' Kevin Powers! YES!

(The camera cuts back to Radder who is ... sleeping.)

SR: Wha? Oh is he done? SNOREFEST! Christ come up with some better material. How about ... CSWA WORLD CHAMPION KEVIN PO ...OH THAT'S RIGHT ... that'll NEVER HAPPEN!

KP: Why you little cruiser son-of-a ...

AT: Watch it ... this is a family show Kevin.

KP: I'm playing for the Give a Midget a Keg Foundation!

(The camera cuts to Gradeus and E-5 who are already jumping up and down and giving eachother high five's.)

AT: (shaking his head) I can't believe it.

KP: Neither can I ... shouldn't that be called a LOW five?

(As Alex is making his way back to the podium both Powers and Radder are taping the buzzer to 'Loves' hand.)

AT: Well here are the categories for tonight. CSWA ... GXW ... Old School Heroes ... The New Breed ... Champions ... and Contenders.

SR: Hey Kevin those last two I'm willing to bet you'll NEVER answer.

KP: Hey Steve, Susan called, she said you can stop wearing her panties.

SR: Oh how droll.

AT: Steve you won the toss backstage ...

KP: That's not all he 'tossed' backstage ...

AT: DAMNIT STOP! Steve it is your turn.

SR: I'll take CSWA for 200 Alex.

AT: The answer is ... He's the most overrated wrestler in CSWA.

KP: OH I KNOW! Who is Hornet!

AT: That is correct. Okay Kevin it's your call.

KP: Alright Alex ... I'll take Old School Hizzo's for 200.

SR: That's hero's you drunk fool.

EL: (recording) I am the Hurricane Lover ...

KP: Damnit Steve quit pulling his strings.

SR: But it's so much fun.

AT: Okay people! The answer is ... You might not be able to teach this old dog any new tricks, but you can watch him hobble his way to the front of hospital line again and again.

KP: Who is Hornet?

AT: You're half right, but I'll need another answer.

SR: Oh yeah! Who is ... GUNS!

AT: Correct you have control of the board Steve.

SR: Well this should be a hoot, but I'll take GXW for 200.

AT: The answer is ... yeah I wrote it so?

KP: Who's that scared to death little BITCH that wrote that smear 'obsession' column on the CSWA website!

AT: Correct. Kevin it is your choice.

KP: Contenders for four hundred.

AT: The answer is ... if they look good I'll sleep with'em. Hell even if they DON'T look good I'll sleep with'em, but they will get to the top ... even if I have to be on top first.

KP: Oh I KNOW!

SR: Beat ya to the buzzer sucker. Who is Ivy!

AT: Correct.

SR: I'll take GXW for four hundred.

AT: The answer is ... who fears GXW.

SR: That's simple ... ratings.

AT: Sorry that's wrong ... Kevin.

KP: You're such the jackass. No wonder I'm gonna whip you and your cardboard love sensation respective asses. Who is Chad Merritt?

AT: Correct. Okay we've got time for one more.

KP: Champions for 600.

AT: The answer is ... He is the most respected champion in CSWA ever!

SR: Well I know this. The question is ... who is everyone else BESIDES Choke on and on Kevin Powers.

KP: You dirty Ice Princess. Well, it can't be you because you would have to STAY SOMEWHERE to gain respect!

(Suddenly Love's buzzer rings and everyone is surprised.)

AT: Um ... Kevin?

EL: Who ... is ... The Teddy Bear ... Lover.

AT: I can't believe it ... CORRECT!

KP: WHAT? HOW THE ...

(Powers looks behind the cardboard cut out and sees Gradeus and E-5 playing with the tape recorder.)

KP: You little bastards. No beer for you!

G & E: Oh Kevin!

KP: Go blow your kazoos!

AT: I can't believe this ... you know what? I'm just gonna call Final Jeopardy right now.

KP: FINALLY!

SR: In a hurry Kevin? Got a drink to catch? Don't choke on the bottle.

KP: Don't you have a salad to toss or something?

SR: Don't you have to clean GUNS jock?

KP: Don't you have to polish Merritt's brass?

AT: THAT'S IT! I'VE HAD IT! ANSWER THIS ONE QUESTION AND WE'RE ALL DONE ... OKAY??

KP: Damn calm down crazy.

SR: Yeah take a chill or something geez.

AT: This is for ANYONE! The answer is ... WHAT THE? WHO'S BEEN MESSING WITH MY CARDS?

EL: It ... was ... the 'Hurricane' Eddy Love!

KP: (Sarcasm shock) HEAVENS NO!

SR: (Sarcasm shock) I'm APPALLED!

AT: Oh you two think you're real cute don't you? DON'T YOU?

KP: Hey we don't we're cute ... (Points who Gradeus and E-5 who are boozing it up again with Jack Daniel and Ron Baracdi bottles) ... THEY think they're cute!

SR: Disgusting.

KP: No disgusting is when I beat your ass from pillar to post at Fish Fund Ice Brain.

SR: If you can find your way to THE RING!

KP: Keep talking trash.

SR: That's the only way you'll respond.

AT: Folks we've gotta leave. For everyone here at Jeopardy ... we're sorry. Good night.

(The shot fades out as Gradeus and E-5 again play the Jeopardy theme music on kazoos.)
 

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