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DEFtv48: Early Results = Early Feedbacks?

Justin

Da BAWS
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Jun 26, 2009
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Website
www.defiancewrestling.com
http://defiancewrestling.com/results/94


In the future, if you're going to add youtube links to your entrance music, learn how to do it the right way.

Why am I editing this shit?



What did we do right?

What did we do wrong?

Match of the Night?

Segment of the Night?

Top Face of the Night?

Top Heel of the Night?

On the Bubble / Who is about to break out?

Favorite Quotes?

Mark-Out Moments?

How was the overall reading experience?
 
Last edited by a moderator:

Evan H.

DEF Director of Fun & Good Humor
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May 7, 2012
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myundertaking.tumblr.com
- King Dewey / Top o' the Show
Dames and I decided early on, our "thing" wasn't going to be a stable or a tag team or anything. Eugene coming out, top of the show, to far more of a negative reaction than Boxer later speaks on that. They aren't a unit... least not yet. The little things put this over, the Venom shirt, the King Koopa music, calling the fans noobs. Eugene still being Eugene, just exploring the "heel" side of being a "nerd"... so much fun. Like a violent Comic Book Store Guy... the Eugene, the Alpha Neckbeard.

- Mending Fences
Exactly the sort of short, for the heck of it little promos we need more of. Short little interstitial things that stitch the card together. Funny stuff. I've noticed us all using Warner a lot, we need to start giving Miss Zane some airtime. Dumb hot chick? Easy mode.

- The Church of Malachi / vs Jake Donovan
I like that there's nothing overtly "supernatural" about Malachi. He's so full of himself, I'd add in as many chicken shit heel tactics as humanly possible. The more he talks himself up as the second coming, the more "followers" he acquires, he needs to be underneath it all just a total and complete coward. That's tried and true wrestling booking right there. Super strong promo work.

- I'll make myself a spot...part 1
Speak of the devil, intrepid interviewer Christie Zane makes an appearance! Another solid short segment, good to see Ryan Matthews back.

- Time is money.
Killin' it with these short promo segments, heck yeah. Love heel Turner. The character works on so many more levels as a heel. Reminds me of the sort of shit the WWF guys would give Cole and Coach back in the day.

- Here’s the Line. You Stepped Over It. Bitch.
Noble reminds me of an ewrestling character from like the late 90's in the best way. Even down to the Days of the New track for his entrance. He has whiffs of John Cena-like confidence that I like in a babyface, the shades of grey both Noble and Holiday are painting with are neat to see in a babyface on babyface situation. Play with the audience more, start having the neck-beards reject someone, start little pockets of boos. Seems to me like the "faithful" would boo the nuts off Noble for that N-Sync / Timberlake reference... just sayin'. :p

- DEF*MAX Tournament (Block B): Frank Holiday vs. Samuel T. Turner the Second
Solid. STT2 looks strong even in defeat, the perks of a really well written match.

- I'll make myself a spot...part 2
Oh Kelly, you're so grumpy.

- Nice to See You
The way the tourney is just "happening" around other arcs and other... stuff... is so neat. The booking is really falling into place this turn. Noble is such a dickhead, this card especially he's growing on me a lot.

- DEF*MAX Tournament (Block A): Mushigihara vs. Bronson Box
Wrote this. Mushi and Eddie are a hoot to play with.

- Reckoning
If you read the card earlier than lunch today I went in and corrected a little continuity error in this seg in regards to Mushi's mask / added a "commercial break for the DEF shop" to give Mushi some time to make it backstage. Minor stuff. But considering this was written completely interdependently of the previous match, they line up really well. Again, I love how the tourney is happening so perfectly parallel to Mushi and Frank/Noble's SoHer shenanigans.

- Who I Used To Be
Really want to see some real attitude from Donovan, we've all seen what a little tweek can do for a character like Sam Turner. Donovan has so much history in DEF, he deserves something... new.

- Troy Matthews vs. Tyrone Walker
Sort of like Donovan, Matthews needs soooooomething else. The character's got good bones, just needs... something.

- The Original DEFIANTS
All Dames, more spooky vagueness as it pertains to EugeBox's "relationship."

- Troy Matthews, Ty Walker, Jake Donovan Seg
Quite the creative segment name boys. LOL... anyway, really liked this. There's a little bit of that something I was talking about. I like the idea of these two characters who've been around for so long in DEF, both sort of on the rocks, suffering loss after loss get frustrated... but in very different ways. Can't wait to see more of this. Good work guys. Nice turnaround.

- DEF*MAX Tournament (Block B): Dan Ryan vs. Curtis Penn
Angus' disdain for Penn makes me laugh. The best moment when handling a chicken shit heel is when you can have your heel cornered into a situation where he really does have to fight for his life. This was really well written and made Penn look resilient as hell. Good shit.

- DEFIANT
[waves at James] LOOK I DID STUFF!

- Match. Tourney. Title.
I've said it a bunch, I'll say it again. BDH < Lindsay Troy as a solo act. She's a lot like Noble in that she's kind of an asshole, but still manages to come across as a total bad ass babyface. That weird confidence, the obvious chip on her shoulder. This is a fantastically simple pre-match that shows why Troy's being moved up to the main events. Really hope I get to work Troy, that shit could be so fun. There's not a lot of characters left I'd like to have an old school roleplay battle with, but Troy's definitely one of them.

- DEF*MAX Tournament (Block A): Lindsay Troy vs. Eugene Dewey
My boy Damien showin' some ass on his first full show as a heel, *sniff* so proud...

Fantastic match. Great card. ONWARD AND UPWARD!
 

Ulfric

League Member
Joined
Aug 23, 2012
Messages
197
Points
0
Really loved how the rundown got started, felt like they were just getting into the flow of things when they got cut off by Eugene, so I’d have to say that the timing on that seg was pretty perfect, interrupting things the way it did.

The Dewey segment was amazing, between the fan reaction and the fact that I could actually picture it in my head while I was reading it. I found myself still wanting to cheer Eugene a little even after what he’d done, despite how much everyone was booing him. I love the moment when he runs down the previous world champions and raises the FIST title in its place, that being the belt HE made valuable and to me, that really made a statement there.

The Keyes segment was a bit of light hearted fun, and I appreciated the continuity carrying over from the earlier show and previous bell clap incident. Its nice watching the personality of the Keyes character develop more and it was a good Segway into what followed.

The church of Malachi segment was a great intro into the match. It’s gonna be fun getting more into this in the upcoming weeks.

A nice Ryan Matthews? Huh? Well, we’ll just have to see where that goes and how long it lasts.

It’s nice seeing STT2 so focused, and clearly fired up.

Loved the way David Nobel got the crowd all fired up with his speech, he addressed so much of what was going on in DEF with the title situation and established right off the bat what kind of champion that he intended to be. He was inviting people to step up and face him which just added to the intensity and the overall vibe the piece gave off. It will be interesting to see who jumps at the chance to face off with him.

Holiday coming out just upped the intensity, and I loved the back and forth between the two setting up for the reveal that there match will be a latter match. They’ve managed to personalize their match at Def Max, which I love because to me that just ups the value of the victory for whoever wins.

Ohhh a match, I’d almost forgotten there were supposed to be those on the show the segs had been so entertaining to read, though maybe we might have been a little seg happy this show, coming off a PPV I think they were all needed.

LMFAO:
DDK:
To our sponsors, my broadcast partner is not advocating LITERALLY BREAKING NECKS in the ring.
Angus:
Don’t speak for me! I damn well AM advocating that!

I’m pretty sure the average human male body holds 5 liters or 10 pints of blood while the average female body holds 4.5 liters or 9 pints of blood, but ech 8 isn’t too far off I guess. The important thing was that it was a really good back and forth match that I felt showed off the toughness of both guys.

Hmmm the nice slipping a bit from the Matthews facade? Guess we will just have to wait and see what he does next. I like the slow build, makes me curious.

I did like the little backstage confrontation between Nobel and Mushi, that was some good stuff there and continues to further the tension between them, I like how everyone has continued to build off of and respond to things from the PPV, its making for a very interesting read.

Hell yeah! DDK:
Wargod? Meet God-Beast.
Angus:
This is going to be so fucking brutal.

And it was, that was a sick, awesome, brutal match and I love love loved that vertical suplex on the steps that in effect, ended the match for both guys in different ways, which, was kinda fitting, really.

Really like the Mushi/Holiday segment, Mushi really has a target on his back at this point and the run part is going to be in seeing who gets their hands on him first…or how many of them get their hands on him and try and turn him into a sushi roll.
Awesome heel heat mushi has going now.

I loved reading the Troy/Ty match, very nicely done, action packed and fast paced, the old guy still has it even if the youngsters keep trying to push him to his limits.

Kinda found myself loving the conversation about club soda too lol. Would love to see a flash to a vinette somewhere of a member of the ring crew trying to scrub bloodstains outta the ring with it.

I am soo interested in seeing what Penn does following his loss, with everything he had been building up to lately, I am hoping for a bit more of Penn next card. Would love to see some backstage with him too, see if he’s got anything else to sell. Memoirs or something lol. Curtis Penn cookbooks. Curtis Penn condoms? Too much maybe lol.

I love Bronson Box….that is all :)

Main event was awesome, didn’t see the ending coming which made it that much sweeter. Great card from top to bottom.
 

CraigM

Member
Joined
Jan 24, 2007
Messages
351
Points
16
Age
38
The Run-Down/A New Beginning: Great setup to the DEF*MAX tournament It was all just fodder for the true attraction which is Eugene Dewey. Probably the moment everyone has been waiting for, the truth as to why Dewey turned. Sure, he said some shit at AfterShock, but he REALLY said some shit here tonight. That bitterness has settled DEEP inside of Dewey and everything he spits out feels so true and honest at the end of the day. This was a very believable turn and this promo really delved into the human reasons why Dewey did what he did. Dames did a great job of humanizing Dewey and pulled off a Hogan-esque turn flawlessly.

Mending Fences: Oh man, I laughed HARD during this segment. Ben really knocked this out of the park, right down to Keyes taking the beer from Warner. Good explanation (kind of?) of why he attacked Warner. Well, a good explanation in the mind of Keyes at least! I liked Warner still playing to the effects of the Bell CLAP. Such a great, great segment and great contrast to the opening one.

The Church of Malachi: Still finding my voice with Malachi, but I think this Church of Malachi idea is going to do wonders (credit to Justin for the idea) for helping me figure out who Malachi is.

Malachi vs. Donovan: Wrote this with Blue. Good stuff coming down the pipeline.

I’ll Make Myself a Spot - Part One: A newcomer of sorts (a return to be exact) gets back into the swing of things. Not much meat here, but good setup to whatever is coming later.

Time is Money: Continuing to love what Chris is doing with STT. It has been truly something else to watch him dig deeper and deeper with this character. With it has come this sadistic, no bullshit character that is just looking to hurt people and make a name for himself. Once again, a great way to take a character to the next level as it is just so human.

Here’s the Line. You Stepped Over It. Bitch: Probably should have changed the title to this seg. It was meant to be one thing and morphed into a completely different thing. All I will say is that I poured everything I had into this seg and then Ken made it awesome. That bastard ;-). So, so good what Ken put down in this seg.

Holiday vs. STT: Ken + Chris rocked a great match here with two people who are fresh off losses at AfterShock. This was a brutal match throughout with the slaps from STT to Holiday, the overhead belly-to-belly suplex to the concrete, and the various battles outside of the ring. Holiday manages to get the victory here, but STT really brought it tonight.

I’ll Make Myself a Spot - Part Two: Instead of getting his roster spot back, Matthews is shot down. Something tells me this isn’t the end of this though.

Nice to See You: Wrote this with Rob.

Mushigihara vs. Bronson Box: Great match between two brutal wrestlers. The ending I thought was well done and really showed that ANYTHING can truly happen in this tournament.

Reckoning: Really liked this segment between Mushi + Holiday. There’s so much going back and forth in this that Mushi/Holiday has kind of been hidden in the background. The attack at AfterShock could have easily been forgotten with the SoHer title change and the DEF*MAX tournament. Still, Frank is not that kind of person. And he makes it known here.

Who I Used To Be: Short and sweet segment between Donovan and Freeman here as Freeman joins the roster as well. Not much else outside of this, just a nice short segment. I think the title says it all.

Troy Matthews vs. Ty Walker: Nice match here that was setup through a Twitter feud of all things. Matthews is just trying to figure out his place in everything and is having some difficulty in figuring it all out. This is him lashing out and Walker brings his a-game, especially in light of becoming a Trios Champion. Good match throughout and does the job in continuing to put Matthews on his path of trying to figure out who he is.

The Original Defiants: Short and sweet.

Matthews/Walker/Donovan Seg: Solid stuff here that sets up Donovan/Matthews. Matthews is just lashing out due to his frustrations. Human response, though not at the level of Dewey/STT as of yet.

Ryan vs. Penn: Really good match here. Short and to the point. Penn gives it his all, but Ryan is definitely a beast in the ring. It was great watching Penn just put it all out there and it not be enough, but not for a lack of trying.

Defiant: Evan really did a great job here of reintroducing Box, not doing it in the ring with words, but in the face of Kelly Evans, probably the only person he truly wants to make sure his message is clearly sent across. Lots of great back and forth here and Bronson’s anger is palatable here.

Match. Title. Tourney.: Loved the title. LT coming out and laying fire as she has finally set her sights on the top title. Oh man, that kind of fire coming from LT could be very dangerous.

Dewey vs. Troy: Match of the night right here. Phenomenal back and forth and I loved every bit of it. Troy getting the victory sets the tone of the tournament and the upcoming arc because it proves Dewey is fallible and Troy has his number. Plus the ending was even better ‘Match. Title. Tourney.’
 

The H.N.I.C.

New member
Joined
Jan 15, 2013
Messages
21
Points
1
What did we do right?: I liked the match pacing for the matches involved, it fit the characters, like Frank Holiday after the war he had with David Noble goes into another war with Samuel Turner, or how Eugene Dewey is so proud of how awesome he feels in turning heel (an interesting twist, for sure) he leaves himself open to a Dragonrana (ALL HAIL QUEEN LINDZ!)

What did we do wrong? The only thing that threw me, was that the Holiday/Turner match followed the Holiday/Noble in-ring segment. It felt like a run-on segment, Holiday was in the ring, drawing money with Noble for their match, then walks to the back, waits for Turner to go to the ring, and then Holiday goes back to the ring. It just threw me off.

Match of the Night? I liked the intensity of the Holiday/Turner match, the brutality of Mushighiara/Box, and the unpredictable ending of the main event. (ALL HAIL QUEEN LINDZ!)

Segment of the Night? Tied between the Holiday/Noble segment and Dewey's opening promo. Holiday/Noble feels as important as it is, and this descent from Dewey being the most inspirational character in Defiance, to one of its most reviled is again very interesting. The Dewey promo came off really well.

Top Face of the Night? Noble. I liked that he addressed the heels in Box, Dewey, and Mushighiara, all in the exuberance of his title win, but planted his flag as the unwavering, and fighting champ.

Top Heel of the Night? Dewey. His promo and laying down the World title, was really well done. After being so beloved, to peel back the layers, and show his bitterness at where he feels the World Title is in comparison to the FIST title, again great work.

On the Bubble / Who is about to break out? I think Malachi is pretty interesting. David Noble as SoHer champ is going to be good too.

Favorite Quotes?

Angus:
….because club soda doesn’t get bodily fluids out of corduroy very well, that’s why.

DDK:
I’m really rather sorry I asked, to be honest.

Angus:
Well, then next time don’t.

DDK:
It’s time for our second match of the night from Block B, and it’s got one of your best friends in it.

Angus:
[Making an audible grunting sound.]
I’m sorta hoping that Dan Ryan murders him clean in a puddle of his own blood and feces.

DDK:
That would leave quite a mess, and we have another match afterward.

Angus:
Well, if it happens, don’t use club soda to clean it up. That stuff doesn’t work for shit.

This made me laugh. I know, I'm weird. But its little stuff like this that make you think you're watching an actual show...the conversations you're not supposed to hear.


Mark-Out Moments? Dragonrana (ALL HAIL QUEEN LINDZ!)

How was the overall reading experience? Veeeeeeerrrrrrrrry Enjoyable. I can't wait to come back, and mix it up. Good show for me from top to bottom.


Shout out to my partner in crime, Ryan Matthews for the two segments he had too. Ultra realistic in that Ryan in real life shows little regard for authorities and attempts to bully women. Art imitating life.....awesome.
 

Damien

Member
Joined
Apr 6, 2012
Messages
515
Points
16
The Run-Down/A New Beginning
God damn am I having a lot of fun exploring the heel side of Eugene. I didn’t think it would be this much fun, but it is.

Mending Fences
I’m a big fan of Henry Key-es. I’m picturing him here like an old sea dog in a pub talking to a young lad that’s just walked over to get a round for him and his mates. I always want more Key-es.

The Church Of Malachi
The development of Malachi is coming on nicely. It’s steady and it’s actually progressing, which is great. We’ve been introduced to him and now it’s time to start fleshing him out. My biggest question here is Angus’ reaction to him though. I seem to remember Angus being Anti-Box when Boxer was into his whole religion schtick, but he’s pro Malachi here.

Am I wrong there? Please could someone (Evan) correct me if I am.

Malachi vs. Jake Donovan
Malachi’s moving up the ranks as well. Development and pacing is spot on and it was a decent opening match.

I’ll Make Myself A Spot...Part 1
Ryan Matthews kind of blended into hookers n blow for me and never really established a character of his own from what I remember, or maybe Black Jesus was just do overtly awesome that Matthews was kind of shadowed by him, so it’ll be interesting to see what he can do on his own.

Time Is Money
The length of this definitely helps it in a big way. It didn’t need to be strung out to hit the major point of it. Good work from Chris here. I’m still adjusting to the fact that Sam is in no way a goo ol’ country boy now, which kind of reminds me of when Bradshaw became JBL.

Here’s The Line. You Stepped Over It, Bitch
Absolutely sterling promo work on this show so far. Evan echoes my thoughts on Noble down to a T. His confidence has taken a major turn from where he was at when he joined DEFIANCE, and it’s nice to see him call out the big dogs. Those words might come back to bite him on the ass one day though.

Frank meanwhile does as Frank does. Both of these guys have bright, bright futures ahead of them in DEF, and them feuding over the Soher title to me is like watching The Rock vs. HHH for the IC title. Give it a year or two and these two will be at the tippy top.

Frank Holiday vs. STT
Yeah, Frank’s intro didn’t need to happen a second time, but hey, that’s a minor thing that can be addressed next time. A good kick off to the tournament and I get the feeling this is what the tourney is going to be all about. Close matches where the results really could go either way. Frank off to a hot start, Sam still looks like a threat going forwards.

I’ll Make Myself A Spot… Part 2
1. Matthews took that really well.
2. Where the HALE was Ty for this seg? A HNB reunion being cut short by the head bitch is charge writes itself.

Nice To See You
I like that the tourney is Eddie and Mushi’s number on concern over the SoHer title. That immediately makes it a bigger deal than if Mushi was more concerned with Noble than Box. Mushi’s found himself in a really, really tough bracket with LT, Box, Dewey and Keyes, and it’s only right that he pays attention to the match against Box.

Bronson Box vs. Mushigihara
GOD DAMNIT MOTHERFUCKING YES! Evan told me he was steering away from God’s Gonna Cut You Down, and I was so damn disappointed. It’s awesome to see it and hear it here.

Well that was always going to be a war, wasn’t it? And we’ve got our first draw of the tournament. Mushi has established himself as a threat in this tournament through that result, and it’s kept everything wide open for (let’s face it) one of the two outsiders in this bracket.

Reckoning
Side bar: I think we should get some more cross bracket stuff going as well. Afterall, the final will end up being between one person from each bracket.

Another nice, short, to the point Seg. This show is seg heavy, but when they’re done and dusted as quick as these I have absolutely no complaints about them.

Who I used to be
I actually like the seed being planted here. I can see where I’d want to take this already, but I’ll hold off on any comments suggesting anything of the sort for the time being.

Troy Matthews vs. Tyrone Walker
I agree so much that Matthews needs something to do. There was that point where he was feuding with Mushi when he could have left that bubble he’s in, but he never took that jump. He just kind of fell back into his usual everyday Troy Matthews self.

Walker had to win this. He’s a new champ after all, and Matthews at this point was right not to win it. I want to care about Troy, but I genuinely think unless something magical comes along for him then Rob’s time would be better spent on Mushi, because I feel so much more invested in that character than I ever had Troy Matthews.

The Original DEFIANTS
Mine. Evan could have helped but he didn’t.

Lazy Evan… Lazy…

Or I just wrote it and submitted it at the last minute.

Yeah, let’s go with that one… because it’s the truth.

Troy Matthews, Jake Donovan, Tyrone Walker Seg
Original title is original.

I didn’t like Jake’s intro into this segment. It feels like Troy’s apology to Ty should have come earlier in the show and then when he tries to apologise to Jake later on that’s when Jake berates him.

Also, holy shit, either Jake or Troy might pick up a win on the next show? That’s new.

Dan Ryan vs. Curtis Penn
Nobody can write Angus’ hatred for Penn like Jon. This had much more of the ‘Get in and get it done’ feel than the other tournament matches on this show, which was a good change of pace.

DEFIANT
I’d put this as the promo of the night, and that’s saying something. When Evan gets his teeth into a Box promo he cuts pure gold, I’m telling you.

Match. Tourney. Title
LT getting room to flex is always good, and if the Trios titles are going to take a back seat rather than be scrapped right now then she’s got load of room to spread her wings.

Eugene Dewey vs. Lindsay Troy
Working with Lindz is always a pleasure, and this was no different. Lindz mapped out the first hald of the match, which I wrote, then I mapped out the second half which Lindz wrote, and I think it worked out pretty damn well.

I’m looking forwards to where this tournament is headed, and with this shows results and the scoreboards as they are, I think most people should be as well.
 

SenorJames

DEFIANT Grandpa
Joined
Jan 11, 2013
Messages
1,098
Points
0
Location
The Land of Cheese
THE RUNDOWN / A NEW BEGINNING
Good lead in and “in show” refresher of how DEF*MAX works. The more I hear “Dark Lord Bowser” the more I love it, Dames, good choice. Only derp in this is Angus calling Dusty by his last name when it should always be Mayberry, but no big. I also really liked the ECW reference when Euge drops the World title to proclaim the FIST of DEFIANCE as THEE title of the company. Outstanding all around piece to kick off the show and Euge as the top man on the roster.

MENDING FENCES
Henry Keyes vs Bronson Box, the good v evil version of themselves can’t happen soon enough. Seriously.


THE CHURCH OF MALACHI
Creepy Church Boy is all angry and such. Solid setup for the Church of Malachi, now if people won’t sleep on it and actually get with Craig to work something, you know, instead of making him do all of the legwork.


MALACHI v JAKE DONOVAN
Good back and forth for an opener with Donovan being game, but Malachi being due for getting his win back. Plus this one is all about Malachi offering a place for Donovan under his wing after it was over… Also, this tidbit of Angus & Keebs:


DDK:
And Malachi gets the victory.
Angus:
Could you sound anymore disappointed.
DDK:
I could, but I would need training from the girls you sleep with.

I’LL MAKE MYSELF A SPOT PT.1
I know where this is going, so I’ll not comment much more than to say it’s solid writing and whatnot, reintroduces Ryan Matthews to the DEFIANT scene. Does what it needs to, etc, yadda.

TIME IS MONEY
Chris really is starting to find his niche now with STT2, you just gotta keep it going, dude.


HERE’S THE LINE. YOU STEPPED OVER IT, BITCH!
The new and improved, moar confident David Noble, really works for me. He battled demons and came out the other side all for the better, and it shows here in this authoritative promo to kick this off. I also love that he touched on more than just his own situation, he put over what happened at the end of Aftershock, showing how much the whole thing matters. Then put over the WHOLE SOHER division and the title itself, this is all excellent promo work… And then this turns sharply with Frank’s entrance and it’s already going good with Frank taking the suddenly cocky Noble to task, hah… Holiday with a lot of humility on tap in his response too, I dig that you two didn’t try to go entirely all “one up” on each other with who is the more awesome of the two. The big challenge for DEFtv #50 is good, the only thing I was kinda iffy on is painting Kelly like she’s the WWE style “Authority.” Not digging that part, because nobody wants an Evil Boss gimmick around here anymore haha. Overall, maybe a tad longer than necessary, but it wasn’t boring, so it’s all good.


DEF*MAX - FRANK HOLIDAY v SAMUEL T. TURNER II
Okay, yeah the one problem with this is, it should have had STT2 come out to start the match with Frank already in the ring… Really fun back and forth brawl, good pacing with just enough ‘selling’ to break up the almost constant action, well done.


I’LL MAKE A SPOT FOR MYSELF PT.2
Again, I know where this is going, so I’ll refrain from comment… Also, the writing is spot on from a technical standpoint, and I believe this is the one Lindz jumped in on to help ‘fact check’ the bitchy boss woman tone for Ryan, hah 8)

NICE TO SEE YOU
Puts over the tournament, puts over the importance of a win over Bronson Box, and keeps up with Noble’s issue regarding Mushigihara. Solid work.


DEF*MAX - MUSHIGIHARA v BRONSON BOX
Knowing Evan, this is gonna be a wild ass brawl and those are always fun to read… And like Dames said, which I also told the Evanator, you do not fuck with Johnny Cash when it comes Bronson Box, that song is perfect for that character. It’s also why I give so much guff to Lindz when it comes to changing from Zepplin for Troy, it’s not my fault you guys found musical perfection for your characters (hence why I likely won’t be changing Dusty’s tune whenever he does return)... ANYWAY, ON TO THE MATCH, YES?!... Just a brutal assault from start to finish, absolutely no slow build, just good ol’ fashion violence and FUN!... Can’t wait to work with ya, Evan, on… uhm, THINGS, yeah, yeah, THINGS… *whistles*


RECKONING
Frank Holiday is always awesome, motivated to wreck faces is even better. Seriously digging these short segments that don’t waste a lot of time with an overabundance of dialogue. This is what we should be shooting for on most segments, IMO, mileage may vary and all of that.


WHO I USED TO BE
Not much to say about this… Is AlexK still around? Haven’t seen him on AIM in a while or heard much of anything about him getting into something with his character?


TROY MATTHEWS v TYRONE WALKER
I wrote this.


THE ORIGINAL DEFIANTS
Indeed. Once again, short, simple, doesn’t need a lot of words. Shows they’re far enough beyond the blood rivals they once were… even if it probably still lurks under the surface.


I COULD HAVE SWORN THIS HAD A TITLE WHEN I POSTED IT
Seriously, I thought I had, my bad… Rob, Blue and I wrote this.


DEF*MAX - DAN RYAN v CURTIS PENN
I got a total Broly vs the Z Fighters vibe from this, only Curtis Penn is a douche heel and not an honorable warrior like Goku, so it makes it all the more fun when Penn gets absolutely smashed for the most part.


DEFIANT
Yes, you certainly did “stuff,” Evan, well played for future considerations, friendo 8)


MATCH. TITLE. TOURNEY.
Ken and I halped mom with this, I mean, she wrote it all, but we let her know it was spot on.


DEF*MAX - EUGENE DEWEY v LINDSAY TROY
DAT SWAGGA MUZAK!... Seriously, this music would work for heel or face LT… Ding muddafuggan DING!... Euge is such a douche now, makes me sad panda 8( haha… HAH, love that he tries for the STAMPEDE and fails… Followed by an old school 10 count of punches, haven’t seen that in ages… Man, this is just another good fight, we might need to consider keeping the 15 minute time limit for DEFtv as rule of thumb, these matches are quick and get to the point… POOOOUNNNNNSSSSAAAAHHH!... BOOM! DRAGONRANA FOR ALL THE WINS!... Good, good match guys.


So far, DEF*MAX is sealing up a sequel based on the first round. Good job to everyone involved.
 
Last edited:

Alex Smiley

League Member
Joined
Feb 21, 2015
Messages
34
Points
6
Location
Somewhere in SoCal
I'm around, I've just been super busy with schoolwork the past couple of weeks. I worked with Blue on the Donovan/Freeman segment though, it was great getting into the swing of things.

Anyways, onto feedback:

What did we do right?

Great setting up of the DEF*MAX tournament, along with setting up new stories coming out of the last PPV. Highlights being the Dewey situation and the Church of Malachi (both of which I'll get into in a bit)

What did we do wrong?

Nothing of any major concern. I feel weird about seeing "BELL CLAPped" in a sentence, but that's so minor that just mentioning it makes me feel like a bad person lol. (Side note, I now fight the urge to yell "BELL CLAP SON" all the time in real life.)

Match of the Night?

Tie between Mushi/Box and the Main Event. Great stuff all around from both matches in particular.

Segment of the Night?

Really dug the stuff further explaining Dewey's actions, and his teaming with Box. As a n00b fan I could appreciate the history here. I also dug the Church of Malachi segment, because for at least half a year I was involved in a similar angle in another fed and frankly I love these sorts of angles. I understand religion isn't everyone's cup of tea, but with my personal background I find this sorta stuff fascinating.

Top Face of the Night?

Noble, really loving his comments on the situation going on around him.

Top Heel of the Night?

Dewey, especially in throwing down the World Title. Wow.

On the Bubble / Who is about to break out?

I'm getting the feeling we're gonna some great stuff from Malachi in the next few weeks. I'm loving where the Church story is going from the start, here.

Favorite Quotes?

DDK:
And Malachi gets the victory.
Angus:
Could you sound anymore disappointed.
DDK:
I could, but I would need training from the girls you sleep with.


Mark-Out Moments?

Dewey throwing down the World Title, you really get a feel for where his head and heart are with the attitude toward that belt.

How was the overall reading experience?

Overall, it was a great show. Can't wait to see how things pick up!
 

Harmony

New member
Joined
Mar 13, 2015
Messages
55
Points
0
Okay thoughts as I read.

Opening rundown was good. Being new to DEF, that gave me a little insight into the tourney. Mr Dewey is an angry asshole. Okay swap "angry asshole" with "petulant child". I feel I should offer him a tissue for his issues.

Had to lol at Henry Keyes basically ignoring Lance's comments.

Malachi needs taking down a peg or 2. Good paced match between the 2 but Donovan took a beating. Will Donovan accept the offer?!

Yes, Ryan Matthews is ALWAYS up to something and it's never good. This is the voice of experience speaking.

Poor Lance Warner. Turner is a jerk.

Interesting exchange between Noble and Holiday. Big news with the match being a ladder match too.

Holiday vs. Turner was a heck of a match. Great writing.

That's not the last we've seen of Ryan Matthews. He's a lot harder to get rid of haha.

Box vs. Mushi was a well written meeting of behemoths. Shame it ended as a count out as it could have gone further, IMO. But that's just me.

I get the feeling Frank Holiday has things planned for Mushi. Just sayin'.

Nice little intro for Kenny Freeman.

Matthews vs. Walker was a good match. Kudos.

Box and Dewey on the same page seems....dangerous?

Oh dear, Jake Donovan isn't having the greatest of nights.

Ryan vs. Penn. I liked this a lot. Good story telling here.

I wouldn't want to get on the wrong side of Kelly Evans, but damn. This is not good for Defiance.

LT'S GONNA KILL YOU.

And she really did. Fab match between Troy and Dewey.


Overall, it was a cracking show. I'm now just trying to get my head around all the characters etc.
 

RyanMatthews

League Member
Joined
May 19, 2013
Messages
38
Points
0
What did we do right? The best absolute thing is that you can tell this is the beginning of the build, no huge moments that could even be considered close to a blowoff...proper progression at its finest. Can't wait to see where the established angles go.

What did we do wrong? Am I wrong in saying it doesn't seem like much of anybody OTHER than the usual suspects are really actively doing anything on this card? If I'm off base I'm sure somebody will fact check me.

Match of the Night? Box vs Mushi - even as a draw, it helps set up well with the entire DEF MAX tourney and the match itself was really a lot of what I personally expect from reading a match involving either of these two guys, brutal poetry in motion. Well-written for sure.

Segment of the Night? Gotta Be Eugene tossing the World title. Total Shane Douglas moment right there but it was awesome.

Top Face of the Night? Noble, hands down. Established himself as a fighting champion, and also showed that he is the epitome of the good guy everybody wants to be.

Top Heel of the Night? Eugene. Nuff said.

On the Bubble / Who is about to break out? Both Noble and Holiday are ready to break into the upper echelon as I see it, both characters are a fun read all the time and have great matches every card. Shows the handlers are really putting in time to get their guys over.

Favorite Quotes?
Angus:This is all your fault, Keebs!
DDK:
Please enlighten us all on how this is my fault?

Angus:
REASONS!

DDK:
Well, I’m sorry then.

Angus:
As well you should be!


Angus pulling a Mr. Torgue line...epic.

Mark-Out Moments? Gotta say I marked out at the LT monologue promo. Well done Lindz

How was the overall reading experience? It was good, and it's actually what I expect from the first show of an arc, not too huge on the build up, let it burn slowly but surely and then it gets better and better as the arc goes on.
 

Chris King

League Member
Joined
Apr 17, 2012
Messages
440
Points
0
What did we do right? Everything, the whole show was great.

What did we do wrong? I dunno.

Match of the Night? Dewey/Troy and Box/Mushi both were good.

Segment of the Night? Church of Malachi, Reckoning, and Defiant

Top Face of the Night? David Noble

Top Heel of the Night? Eugene Dewey

On the Bubble / Who is about to break out? Frank Holiday, he’ll be Heavyweight Champion sooner or later, so I feel.

Favorite Quotes? There were so many good/funny quotes, I honestly can’t choose.

Mark-Out Moments? Dewey tossing the belt, NWA we ain’t we are better than them.

How was the overall reading experience? Good show.
 

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