CuseTroy
League Member
[FADE IN: Tom Holzerman stands in front of the big screen at the TEAM studios, where there's a shot of Mike Randalls hoisting the Merritt Trophy in 2008.]
TH: One year later, but the song remains the same. The field's a little smaller, but the action's as fast and furious as ever. Eight men battle for the final four spots in the TEAM Invitational Tournament as the quest for the Merritt Trophy begins on EPICENTER ... RIGHT NOW!
[Cue up "Down" by Stone Temple Pilots.
Cut to JASON PAYNE, shouting out in primal fury with a man's blood as his war paint.
Cut to ROCKO DAYMON whipping ULYSIS SOLIAN off the ropes.
Cut to RAVAGER rolling out of the way of a ROB FRANKLIN top rope headbutt.
Cut to MUNSON MONSOON tossing HIGH FLYER out of the FREE FOR ALL~! ring.
Cut to MIKE RANDALLS hoisting the Merritt Trophy, then flash cut to TYLER RAYNE with the Harvard Avalon Memorial Trophy held by his side, then flash cut to The A-List hoisting the Dupree Cup, and finally to FUSENSHOFF holding the Championship of Champions.
Cut to: The Epicenter logo once more, fading into Tom Holzerman and Steve Murray at the EPICENTER desk.]
SM: Welcome one and all to a very special edition of EPICENTER...
TH: Where today Steve comes to terms with his crippling Skittles addiction.
SM: I can quit any time I want!
TH: Whatever.
SM: Quiet you ... aaaaanyway, our play-in matches have just concluded in East Lansing, so let's not waste any time and get right to the action as eight men vie for the right to face our number one seeds when the first round gets underway.
[Cut to a one-shot of Tom Holzerman with an inset Nate Dakota/Lance Spencer graphic.]
TH V/O: We start out with a barnburner in our West Region qualifier as "The Standard" Lance Spencer tries to live up to his moniker against Nate Dakota. Video monkeys ... JUICE IT!
[Wipe to Spencer and Dakota circling each other.]
TH V/O: Bit of a feeling out process early, but eventually, these two bulls lay right into each other, and the 6-foot-6 Spencer uses his reach to gain the advantage with a few jabs before diving in for a tackle and laying in the hammer fists.
[Cut to Dakota bulling Spencer into the corner.]
TH V/O: Not to be outdone, Dakota takes the Measuring Stick to the corner and lays in a good, ol' fashioned clubberin'. Nothing pretty about those forearms and knees ... but the BIG powerslam out of the corner sure looks good, and it scores a two-count.
[Cut to Dakota shooting Spencer off the ropes.]
TH V/O: Dakota still pressing the advantage, managing to get the 295-pound Spencer ALL the way up for the tilt-a-whirl side slam! That doesn't get him the three, but it does give him the chance to take a little out of the Standard with this nasty Boston Crab.
[Cut to Dakota whipping Spencer from post to post.]
TH V/O: And if that's not enough, here's the whip into the corner ... and a HYOOGE running shoulderblock, followed by a Northern Lights suplex for a two count!
[Cut to Dakota with Spencer in a standing headscissors.]
TH V/O: But, from the files of the Biting Off More Than You Can Chew Department, Dakota's sandbagged on the powerbomb attempt, and the big man Spencer LAUNCHES him backwards with a back body drop. Up comes Dakota, but he runs smack dab into a MASSIVE LARRRRIAAATO~! from Lance Spencer!
[Cut to Spencer with Dakota in a rear waistlock.]
TH V/O: And once Spencer turned the tides, the big man started to roll. Tetbook German Suplex here, and if one's good, hey, why not another, and one more after that as the Standard completes the trifecta.
[Cut to Spencer charging towards Dakota.]
TH V/O: And if that's not enough ... how about this GIGANTIC running boot that sends Dakota halfway to Detroit?
[Cut to Spencer with Dakota in a front facelock.]
TH V/O: A little later on, Spencer trying to finish with the Higher Standard, but Dakota's not done yet as he blocks and hits a snap suplex off his own, followed by a brutal shining wizard that's good for two.
[Cut to Dakota hoisting Spencer over his shoulder.]
TH V/O: Dakota didn't QUITE have enough, though, as the powerful Spencer reverses the Air Raid Crash into a beautiful sunset flip, holds on for the three and earns a first-round date with Dan Ryan!
[Cut to Steve Murray with an inset Ragin' Redneck/Cassidy McKenzie graphic.]
SM: No time to waste, we move to the Midwest, the winner to face TEAM Challenge Champion Ravager in the first round as "The Rage" Cassidy McKenzie takes on "The Ragin' Redneck" Bubba J, in a match made in anger management heaven.
[Wiped to McKenzie launching himself at Bubba J.]
SM V/O: And the 40-year-old McKenzie doesn't waste any time re-establishing his all or nothing reputation with this flipping body block that sends the Redneck tumbling to the floor.
[Cut to McKenzie hitting the ropes.]
SM V/O: That's not all, though, as McKenzie shoots through the ropes like a heat-seeking missile with this TOPE SUICIDA, and I'm pretty sure the Irishman doesn't mind that he crashed and burned into the barricade.
[Cut to McKenzie back inside the ring, laying in clubbing blows to Bubba J's back.]
SM V/O: McKenzie keeping up the attack, battering Bubba with these forearms to the back, followed by a NASTY running kneelift that knocked out whatever teeth the Ragin' Redneck had left and a quick swinging neckbreaker for a nearfall.
[Cut to McKenzie charging at Bubba in the corner.]
SM V/O: Bubba had something left, however, as he turns this attempted running splash into Snake Eyes, and follows right up with the FLYING HUG OF DOOM~!, more commonly known as the spear.
[Cut to Bubba hooking McKenzie for a suplex.]
SM V/O: The redneck's rampage didn't last long, however, as McKenzie slips behind on the suplex, rams Bubba into the corner and connects with the BACKDROP DRIVAH!
[Cut to McKenzie perched up top.]
SM V/O: It's all elementary from there, as Cassidy takes flight and drops the point of his knee RIGHT on the back of Bubba J's neck, and that'll do to send "The Rage" into the field of 32.
[Cue up "No Quarter" by Led Zeppelin over a shot of The Spaniard and Masked Violator 2 locking horns.]
TH V/O: Two spots down, two to go to complete the TIT field. Up next, who gets the privilege of facing off with the Underground Pimp in the East? EPICENTER's back in 90 seconds.
[Cut to the Free Credit Report guys singing about something.]
TH: One year later, but the song remains the same. The field's a little smaller, but the action's as fast and furious as ever. Eight men battle for the final four spots in the TEAM Invitational Tournament as the quest for the Merritt Trophy begins on EPICENTER ... RIGHT NOW!
[Cue up "Down" by Stone Temple Pilots.
Cut to JASON PAYNE, shouting out in primal fury with a man's blood as his war paint.
Cut to ROCKO DAYMON whipping ULYSIS SOLIAN off the ropes.
Cut to RAVAGER rolling out of the way of a ROB FRANKLIN top rope headbutt.
Cut to MUNSON MONSOON tossing HIGH FLYER out of the FREE FOR ALL~! ring.
Cut to MIKE RANDALLS hoisting the Merritt Trophy, then flash cut to TYLER RAYNE with the Harvard Avalon Memorial Trophy held by his side, then flash cut to The A-List hoisting the Dupree Cup, and finally to FUSENSHOFF holding the Championship of Champions.
Cut to: The Epicenter logo once more, fading into Tom Holzerman and Steve Murray at the EPICENTER desk.]
SM: Welcome one and all to a very special edition of EPICENTER...
TH: Where today Steve comes to terms with his crippling Skittles addiction.
SM: I can quit any time I want!
TH: Whatever.
SM: Quiet you ... aaaaanyway, our play-in matches have just concluded in East Lansing, so let's not waste any time and get right to the action as eight men vie for the right to face our number one seeds when the first round gets underway.
[Cut to a one-shot of Tom Holzerman with an inset Nate Dakota/Lance Spencer graphic.]
TH V/O: We start out with a barnburner in our West Region qualifier as "The Standard" Lance Spencer tries to live up to his moniker against Nate Dakota. Video monkeys ... JUICE IT!
[Wipe to Spencer and Dakota circling each other.]
TH V/O: Bit of a feeling out process early, but eventually, these two bulls lay right into each other, and the 6-foot-6 Spencer uses his reach to gain the advantage with a few jabs before diving in for a tackle and laying in the hammer fists.
[Cut to Dakota bulling Spencer into the corner.]
TH V/O: Not to be outdone, Dakota takes the Measuring Stick to the corner and lays in a good, ol' fashioned clubberin'. Nothing pretty about those forearms and knees ... but the BIG powerslam out of the corner sure looks good, and it scores a two-count.
[Cut to Dakota shooting Spencer off the ropes.]
TH V/O: Dakota still pressing the advantage, managing to get the 295-pound Spencer ALL the way up for the tilt-a-whirl side slam! That doesn't get him the three, but it does give him the chance to take a little out of the Standard with this nasty Boston Crab.
[Cut to Dakota whipping Spencer from post to post.]
TH V/O: And if that's not enough, here's the whip into the corner ... and a HYOOGE running shoulderblock, followed by a Northern Lights suplex for a two count!
[Cut to Dakota with Spencer in a standing headscissors.]
TH V/O: But, from the files of the Biting Off More Than You Can Chew Department, Dakota's sandbagged on the powerbomb attempt, and the big man Spencer LAUNCHES him backwards with a back body drop. Up comes Dakota, but he runs smack dab into a MASSIVE LARRRRIAAATO~! from Lance Spencer!
[Cut to Spencer with Dakota in a rear waistlock.]
TH V/O: And once Spencer turned the tides, the big man started to roll. Tetbook German Suplex here, and if one's good, hey, why not another, and one more after that as the Standard completes the trifecta.
[Cut to Spencer charging towards Dakota.]
TH V/O: And if that's not enough ... how about this GIGANTIC running boot that sends Dakota halfway to Detroit?
[Cut to Spencer with Dakota in a front facelock.]
TH V/O: A little later on, Spencer trying to finish with the Higher Standard, but Dakota's not done yet as he blocks and hits a snap suplex off his own, followed by a brutal shining wizard that's good for two.
[Cut to Dakota hoisting Spencer over his shoulder.]
TH V/O: Dakota didn't QUITE have enough, though, as the powerful Spencer reverses the Air Raid Crash into a beautiful sunset flip, holds on for the three and earns a first-round date with Dan Ryan!
[Cut to Steve Murray with an inset Ragin' Redneck/Cassidy McKenzie graphic.]
SM: No time to waste, we move to the Midwest, the winner to face TEAM Challenge Champion Ravager in the first round as "The Rage" Cassidy McKenzie takes on "The Ragin' Redneck" Bubba J, in a match made in anger management heaven.
[Wiped to McKenzie launching himself at Bubba J.]
SM V/O: And the 40-year-old McKenzie doesn't waste any time re-establishing his all or nothing reputation with this flipping body block that sends the Redneck tumbling to the floor.
[Cut to McKenzie hitting the ropes.]
SM V/O: That's not all, though, as McKenzie shoots through the ropes like a heat-seeking missile with this TOPE SUICIDA, and I'm pretty sure the Irishman doesn't mind that he crashed and burned into the barricade.
[Cut to McKenzie back inside the ring, laying in clubbing blows to Bubba J's back.]
SM V/O: McKenzie keeping up the attack, battering Bubba with these forearms to the back, followed by a NASTY running kneelift that knocked out whatever teeth the Ragin' Redneck had left and a quick swinging neckbreaker for a nearfall.
[Cut to McKenzie charging at Bubba in the corner.]
SM V/O: Bubba had something left, however, as he turns this attempted running splash into Snake Eyes, and follows right up with the FLYING HUG OF DOOM~!, more commonly known as the spear.
[Cut to Bubba hooking McKenzie for a suplex.]
SM V/O: The redneck's rampage didn't last long, however, as McKenzie slips behind on the suplex, rams Bubba into the corner and connects with the BACKDROP DRIVAH!
[Cut to McKenzie perched up top.]
SM V/O: It's all elementary from there, as Cassidy takes flight and drops the point of his knee RIGHT on the back of Bubba J's neck, and that'll do to send "The Rage" into the field of 32.
[Cue up "No Quarter" by Led Zeppelin over a shot of The Spaniard and Masked Violator 2 locking horns.]
TH V/O: Two spots down, two to go to complete the TIT field. Up next, who gets the privilege of facing off with the Underground Pimp in the East? EPICENTER's back in 90 seconds.
[Cut to the Free Credit Report guys singing about something.]