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FINALS CHALLENGE MATCH: Cruise/Hiroshi vs. Scott/Mr. E

EpyonMarx

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[FADE IN. Mr Entertainment is standing in his street clothes in front of a TEAM logo. Nothing fancy from the most entertaining man on the planet tonight]

ME: Yeah. I lost. The most entertaining man on the planet ain’t gonna be fightin’ fer that trophy, makin’ the Czarina look good. I’m sorry. I failed ta stay awake through the Snoragon’s long-winded diatripe.

I’d also like ta apologise fer the incompetence of the TEAM film crew fer not gettin’ ta me sooner. Ya see, I had a great spiel lined up – even had a new band from the UK set ta play their biggest hit fer ya. But alas, the film crew got so bored waitin’ fer Czarina and Snoragon ta start talkin’, they actually fell asleep. So, it’s here, last minute, they manage ta get ta me. Pro Plus strikes again.

Yep – ya’ll gonna be ENTERTAINED in Madison Square Garden again, as the committee decided ta make a tag-team match fer yer enjoyment. On the one hand, Mister Kipling with his exceedingly good cakes teams up with Cameo. On the other, ya’ve got ME, Mister Entertainment, and…

The Phenomebore? Hell, I know I carried that loser to the best match he’s EVER gonna have, but hell – I ain’t gonna be able ta leave him in the ring! The fans don’t wanna see him. The only reason he had a great match in this whole shebang was because I can carry a plank o’ wood to a great match – and that thing was a damn site easier ta work with than the Phenomebore. What the hell those bookers were thinkin’ is beyond me, folks.

But we’ve gotta make the best of what we’ve got. So, Frankensnoozer – no tryin’ ta one-up me. Ya’ll tried that an’ it made you look even more of an idiot than ya’lready did. Ya’ll know I ain’t a fan of yers. So we’ll leave it at that.

Now, movin’ on ta “Would You Love A Muffinman?” and Cameo… actually, I’ll leave Boo-boo ta continue doin’ what he’s doin’ with Cameo – stuff him. I’ve carried an’ beaten his ass this year already. By the guys own logic, he ain’t got a chance against me. P****man, on the other hand – well, the guy uses poisoned pastries. The guy got annihilated by the Snoragon in two thousand four. The man could barely carry Joeatric to the damn ring.

An’ he thinks he’s got a chance against me?

But don’t ya’ll worry folks – though I’ve got three deadweights in this match ta carry, ya’ll know ya’ll’re gonna get ENTERTAINED like only the most entertaining man on the planet can. After all, ya’ll need sumthin’ ta watch that night – Czarina and Snoragon ain’t got a chance.

Because that night, like the entire tournament, is all about ME.

Mister Entertainment.

[FADE OUT]


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OoC: I would like to publically apologise to Tom and my opponents/partner for not getting anything up sooner for this match. Sorry I left it this late - I had planned to get something up a couple of saturdays back but completely forgot. Sorry ><
 

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