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One True King


Jan 1, 2000
(CUT TO: Troy Windham, U.S. Flag bandana, Oakley shades, white wifebeater-style tank top, big blue jeans, standing under a "Welcome To New Orleans" billboard on the edge of town.)

TROY: I've never been one to mince words, which is probably why I've never been one to have everyone behind him. I've set international attendence records yet I'm regarded as an anti-hero. For every four hotties who sleep with me, there's some dude out there with bad acne and an Eli Flair shirt on making an I Hate Troy Windham web page. While I'm certainly loved, I don't think I once have ever said that I was universally loved. You can love me and you can hate me... but no matter what, I'm going to say and do whatever I want. And if you don't like it, well in the immortal words of some 70's sit come star whose name I don't recall right now... you can just kiss my grits.

Mike Randalls, you're right. I have been running from you. For years now, I've been running for you. I've hit you from behind. Do you know WHY Mike Randalls?

Because there is only one, true King. You see, Mike... it's been said that 99 percent of your matches are won before the match ever begins. You are *THAT* intense and you are *THAT* great at the mental side of wrestling, that by the time the bell rings, you've already won. When you combine your mental acumen with your physical brilliance... well, daddy... there's no surprise why a lot of people consider you to be one of the greatest of all-time.

But, Hungry Like The Wolf... there is only one, true King. I'm a master of hype. I'm a master of self-promotion. And moreso than the partially retarded Eli Flair... moreso than the puppetmaster Hornet... moreso than yourself... I'm a master of the mind.

You see, Mikey... no one gives Big Daddy T any credit in the ring. I'm a Slacker. I'm lazy. I take short-cuts. And I'm the first to admit that I do. But let me bring you back a few months, Mikey. I took on some little boy by the name of Johnny Lang. We had ourselves a good little match, he was tougher than I gave him credit for. And it turns out... the little Warhorse pinned my shoulders to the mat, because Eli Flair snuck me from behind. But that's fine and well. Because I'm a Slacker. I'm lazy. I tried to take short-cuts. And I got upset. But because I'm more preoccupied with my bling-bling and I get my swerve on nightly... it's expected.

Mike Randalls... I know someday me and you are going to meet in the ring. Randalls... if you beat me, so be it. You beat me. But Mike Randalls, if... no, WHEN... I make you eat SlackKnife and you get pinned... then I'll own you for the rest of your life. The Wolf can go and hunt his prey all he wants. But when The Wolf thinks he has his prey trapped, he's going to look up with his cold, unfeeling eyes... and he's going to realize that the hunter has always been the hunted. Mike Randalls, I'm the One True King. And right when you think you're going to take my crown... you're going to realize that somehow, without you knowing, you've been genuflecting to me the entire time. (FTB)


Jan 1, 1970
(RANDALLS still in the Bayou...)

RANDALLS: "Don't play the denial games, Troy. Sooner or later you have to admit that its not about the pinfall. You know what I'm striving for, Troy...you know where I'll want to go. That's what you need to prepare Love for...unless you're just setting him up to be the kill and hope I just leave satisfied. Won't happen - not this time. Troy, you just never got it. I never WAS nor WANTED to be the King. I'm just the (BLEEP)ing BLOODY REVOLT. I'm the HUNDRED YEARS."


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