"The Tackeh Jack! It is goot to find such wrestlinks competitiver here in the Red Line!"
(IKAN JOBTAYOO stands before the classic RLW green screen. Barry has put up a rotating series of short National Geographic polar bear clips. Occasionally a crudely animated Ikan wipes across the screen, karate kicking bears in the face or groin to move to the next clip.
Ikan wrestles bears.)
IKAN: "I am the real life wrestlinkers, mister Jack, and you are the real lifes too! Your game shows, they are LEGEND in the Bjelkez, the town of my home towns! You much lyke the werld famous polar bear, PERUSHKA, the pride of the home towns, who travels all the USS and R to give joy to the childrens! It is greatest honor to face you in the Red Line Wrestlink!
Now, the as you knows, me and my greatest of familial cousins, the UKAN JOBTAMEE, they call us the Winners and the Losers, because sometimes we wins and sometimes we loses! But I have a sneaking suspicions, my great good friend mister Jack - maybe this can be mine opportunities! Maybe this times, I prove to all the Bjelkezers and the PERUSHKA that I am the truly wrestlinker!
A good match, let us have it, da?"
(FTB)