SLAMTRACK 4: Kid Koala v. J.J. Hill v. "Tacky" Jack Smiley

[brusch]

QUARTERFINAL MATCH - Red Crown Tournament

Roleplaying thread for Kid Koala v. J.J. Hill v. "Tacky" Jack Smiley

1000-word roleplay limit
No stacking allowed whatsoever

Roleplay deadline is Friday, October 17 at 11:59pm Red Line time

 

[fugginVOSS]

(FADE IN: on a handheld camera framing a known character, standing in a subway tunnel illuminated by what appears to be a flashlight. He’s KID KOALA. He leans on a wall, with a foot flat against it, not even looking at the camera. He wears a Chicago Bulls Dennis Rodman jersey.)

KK: “A lot of people are sayin’ that we are aimless, man. That we have no, and serve no, purpose in this company. Goals are as measurable as any well versed perception, dude. Perception is everythin’. Perseverance is intentional. Prevalence is a gift we can only give to ourselves.

“Whoa… that’s deep.”

(He raises the hand closest to the camera and waggles his finger.)

KK: “What you mistake as meanderin’ through this company like vagrants contradicts itself in... We have purpose, man. It's just it's far clearer to me since I understand our intent. You just can't fathom its beauty, dude, since y'all are too distracted by what's ugly.

“We are beautiful. So are you. And for all intents and purposes on this planet we ALL make our own choices as to if we shall let it remain intact.”

(KOALA turns to face the camera, pointing down the barrel of the camcorder.)

KK: “You do it from your armchair because you either don't have the capacity or your capacity frightens you.

“We don't just think.

“We don't just say.

“We do.

“If it feels good do it. If it feels right believe it. If it must be then it must be and only you can say what it becomes, brah.

“Do you make the beauty stand out? Do you enhance it?”

(He leans back against the wall, foot up again.)

KK: “Or do you take it away?”

(He rummages in his pocket and pools out a pack of smokes, tapping one out against his wrist before plucking it out with his other hand.)

KK: “We’re comin’ closer and closer to the pinnacle of this company bein’ found and it is up to the man to make his decision.

“Do I enshroud this picture with my beauty or should I let things get ugly?

“And the best part of that decision is, man...”

(He turns to the camera and points at it with the cigarette.)

KK: “I don't gotta make it yet.

“I get to make it when the Red Line rails into Slam 4 and I stand across from Tacky Jack and JJ Hill. I make my decision right then, right there, in the moment. In the SPUR, dude.

“Coz that’s what I live for. The moment.

“JJ… Jack… you can come into the moment with me or watch it pass you by. It’s in your hands, man.

“In – your – hands.

“I can’t force you to make your own decision. I can’t force you to live your life.

“But by and by, you’re comin’ into mine and I will do what I please with my own… even if that means I stand above your bodies coated in your blood yearnin’ for you to stay just – a little bit – longer.”

(He passes the cigarette between his hands.)

KK: “Or I let you move forward. I sit back and I watch as you just pass me by and move onto the next one. One by one. Towards that zenith.

“A red crown.”

(A chuckle resonates in his throat.)

KK: “Makes sense... A red crown for a blood sport.

“A red crown for a broken man.

“A Red Crown of Wrestlin’.”

(He leans back against the wall.)

KK: “Maybe my crown is made of thorns and I shall be your martyr.

“And JJ… and Jack… they are to me what Pontious Pilate was to that crown.

“Or I shall be the spear in their side.”

(FADE to BLACK!)

KK: (V/O) “And you shall watch me die.”

 

[Showtime]

[In the much-vaunted RLW Promo Room, J.J. Hill sits in a folding lounge chair, reading a ragged copy of Atlas Shrugged, a furrowed and confused brow rests above his eyes.]

J.J.: Y'know, this Tony Atlas bio makes no sense.

[With a shrug of his own, Jake Hill Jr. puts the book onto his pile and reaches for a bottle of generic "Sport Drink", since Red Line hasn't acquired any sponsorships yet.]

J.J.: So, after a long and pleasant extended summer vacation, it is time for your old pal the Hangman to head back to the ring.

[With a hand on the side of his mouth, Hill offers an aside.]

J.J.: That would be me, by the way. Anyway yes. J.J. Hill, me, myself, I will be competing for wrestling most coveted prize, the... uh.

[He looks off camera, hoping for a prompt from intern Barry.]

Barry: Sigh... the Red Crown. I'm am not supposed to talk in these. I was given an "Expectations" write-up last week.

[In a quiet protest, the green screen reads in big bold letters "I AM STUPID." J.J. presses on, none the wiser.]

J.J.: Right, tha thing. Well it shall be coveted no more because I shall possess it, thus nagating my coveting it.

Barry: Word-A-Day calendar?

J.J.: Pfft! As if! This is the 21st century! I got an app. A fine piece of iconiclastic postmodern er... stuff.


[J.J. holds up his phone. Sure enough, Word A Day app.]

J.J.: So back to the coveting. Y'see, I am going to go into SlamTrack 4, face off against Jack Smiley, and Kid Koala, defeat said gentlemen, then go on and do some tag teamy thing and BAM~! I am in a match where I get to win the Red Crown. Yay me.

[J.J. holds up his hands in a "Yay ME' sort of fashion.]

J.J.: We done?

Barry: Really, you're going to get me fired here...