WFW Christmas Card: Jared Wells (c) vs. Thirteen

[PaulNJ21]

This match is for the BAD World Heavyweight Title.

The deadline for this match is Friday, January 7th 11:59 PM EST. Send all angles to pmiller21@gmail.com

 

[BarryClarkJr]

Born As Ghosts

(FADEIN: Jared Wells sitting on the floor in his classic sleeveless black tee shirt 'Bastard Son'. Leaned up against the couch, there is nobody in the living room, nor anything on the table. No booze, no YaY. Jared seems to be concerned about certain issues)

JARED WELLS: All kinds of crazy (BLEEP) going on 'round here! Where do I begin here? Costing Maelstrom and Dan Ryan they're match? (LAUGHS) The Inner Circle thought the story was about to end but it only just begun. So let the games begin. Mother (BLEEP) (BLEEP) (BLEEP) (BLEEP) (BLEEP) (BLEEP) (BLEEP) (BLEEP) (BLEEP) (BLEEP) (BLEEP). That's all I got to say about that!

Now Christmas is upon us. Should really be called Lovemas because the way things are running around here, its a celebration. I can't complain. (BLEEP) Psycho paths, crazy Anarky, and the (BLEEP) president! Plus yours truly the bastard son of wrestling.

Thirteen how do you fall into the picture now? What makes you the man of the hour? Big deal, you come after twelve and before fourteen! I've seen the movie Seven and I've wrestled a dude named Se7en. What does the number thirteen represent? Am I supposed to be scared?

I have thirteen kids I don't even know.
I have thirteen girlfriends, wives.
I've been arrested thirteen times.
I've been fired thirteen times.
I've had sex with thirteen women at the same time. Well OK, fourteen.
I've had thirteen surgeries.
I've been shot thirteen times before. Well not really.
Thirteen times Copycat has had a world title shot.
Maelstrom is watered down due to working for thirteen companies at the same time.
Thirteen times Copycat repeats the word respect in one sentence.
Thirteen times El PCP Iris has lost in a row but still receives title shots
Thirteen superstars signed thanks to L.O.V.E.
Thirteen beers.
Thirteen shots.

And the guy named Thirteen. Big deal.

Somehow you've slithered into the picture of my BAD World Heavyweight title. Your knowledge of this title is weak, bleak, and terrible. Of course Uncle 'Ol Dirty Jared has to babysit another name that tries to somewhat gain a reputation around here. Yeah I'm not some poor drunk who sits back and watches the (BLEEP) go by. Well, maybe I am but I won't (BLEEP) admit it! Since I won this belt in April, I've beaten everyone who has tried to take it from me. I mean, I've thrown people off a cruise ship in order to keep my belt. Besides that, jumping onto the rail and dropping the leg into the water which is many feet high. Whatever man.

Your in my world.
Your in L.O.V.E's world.

This world of L.O.V.E falls on everyone. I bring out the worst in everyone, I take the best from everyone. Question I have for you Thirteen is, what do you have to offer? Felix already put you six feet under into the ground, now I must hammer the final nail in your own coffin.

Christmas time can be special. I don't like to give but like to receive.

Don't worry Twelve, if you hear any noise....
Its just me and the boys.
It's just L.O.V.E.
It's the BAD World Heavyweight Champion

My bag consists of bats, nails, barbed wire, and a box of condoms. Well, not the condoms. But you know what I mean. In my head there is only this belt. This life? Who cares. Wanna see some crazy (BLEEP) Twelve?

Call yourself Sixty-Nine! Make me happy if you want. For a cheap giggle or whatever! They say your born to die. But then again they say your born as a ghost.
The year 2005 just so happens to be a few weeks away and what a better way to begin the new year than to stomp some rookie. I don't want to kill you kid, I just want to hurt you.

Smile mother (BLEEP) it's Christmas!
It's Santa mother (BLEEP) Wells.

Want this belt?

...All 'ya gotta do is just kill me.

 

[DmntdDuergar]

Thirteen.

*Thirteen is seen standing on top of a hill, the wind blows gently, his coat billowing slightly.*

We can sit here and play the number games. We can argue about the mathematical nature of the match we are about to have. We can sit back and drink thirteen beers and thirteen shots while watching ‘Thirteen Ghosts’ thirteen times on a thirteen foot couch in the middle of route thirteen. Please. All you’ve proven so far is that hardest thing you’ve ever done in your life is graduate the second grade. Which no doubt is going to make you want to respond with ‘If graduating the second grade was the hardest thing I’ve done then beating you should be nothing’ or something along those lines.

You’re going to twist and mangle everything I say to you. You’re going to bring in thirteen more insults. You’re going to thirteen this and thirteen that. You forget that in this match, there is one number that means everything. Zero. That’s how many times we’ve fought. That’s how many wins I have in this federation. Because of my ignorant team mates I lost at the Cibernetico. Because I didn’t care, I lost at Ghoulish Games. Not this time. Not anymore.

You want to know what I carry in my bag of goodies? Nothing. I don’t need over-used barbed wire this, and nailed that to defeat you. Those are party favors compared to what I will do to you with my bare hands. I will take the title. It will become mine.

You can throw me off a boat, you can hang me by my throat, you can beat me here and there, you can beat me everywhere. You can hit me with a bar, from here or afar, you can make fun of thirteen, you can rupture my spleen. But I will have your head, Mr. Jared. I will have the belt, it will be pain which you have felt. I will remove your face, I will make you a disgrace. Now that I’ve had my fun playing Dr. Seuss, lets see what you can tell this federation about me that is going to hurt.

Please, dig into my sordid past, pull forth the skeletons in my closet. Insult my manhood, call me anything and everything you want. You’re just like everyone else. You stand there with your mouth open, spewing forth absolutely nothing, wasting the air that you breathe. If you fight half as well as the amount that you talk I might consider trying at this match. So far you give me no reason to waste my time on you other than the fact that you carry a belt.

*fades*

 

[DmntdDuergar]

Resurrection

*A black limousine pulls up in front of the camera and stops. The camera pans around the scene and you can see it is the same graveyard where Felix and Thirteen punished each other. Turning back to the limousine the rear door opens and an older man with shoulder length salt and pepper hair steps out surveying the scene. Behind him comes what looks to be a scraggly jungle kid with a collar and chain on to accent the loin cloth he’s wearing, and behind him none other than Thirteen, wearing a large floppy brimmed hat to cover his face. As Thirteen closes the door behind him you can see his clothes are still mangled from the beating he took from Felix red.”

Z: “You say you found him here?”

*The old man stares at the graveyard, pulling at his goatee.*

Z: “Looks like a war went on here. Blood everywhere.”

Iht: “Oooh… old man no like blood. He squeamish.”

*The young wild looking one taunts the Z.*

Z: “Shut it you little f*ck tard.”

Thirteen: “Alright you two. I had to deal with your bantering back and forth all the way here and I’m not in the mood to deal with it. You know good godd*mn well when as soon as we get him out of here he’s gonna be p*ssy as all hell and I frankly don’t want to deal with that by myself.”

Z: “Why did he go back to sleep anyways?”

Iht: “He get tired of wrinkles!”

*Iht points a finger at Z and laughs, Z responds with pointing a finger back.*

Iht: “I call you Mr. Jackson keep pointing at me!”

*Thirteen backhands Iht sending him head over heels into the side of the limo.*

Thirteen: “One more crack at each other and I’ll make sure you’re the next one buried and I won’t be back to dig you out.”

*The other two stare at Thirteen in shock as he walks off towards the mausoleum. They fall in behind him and descend the steps. Thirteen pulls out a flashlight and points it at the far wall. There’s a big splatter where someone’s head apparently bounced off the sandstone. He shines the light around the area and there is what appears to be an archaic symbol imbedded into the stone.*

Z: “I’ll be sh*t faced in a c*ck house.”

*Iht snickers and Thirteen shoots a glance at him quelling the sound.*

Thirteen: “Yeah, well you didn’t have to have your head bounce off of it to see that it was there. Open it up.”

*Z looks at Thirteen and shakes his head no, offering up the crowbar. Thirteen takes it roughly and starts prying around the edge of the tomb.*

Thirteen: “And to think you once worked for him. You’re a disgrace now. You of all people should be helping with this. You owe him your life.”

Z: “And like you did a whole h*lluva lot with things when he went off again. You let the organization fall apart.”

*Thirteen stops for a moment and looks Z square in the face.*

Thirteen: “You ran off into the night just like he did, not knowing what to do with yourself and now look at you. You are now what everyone thinks you are. You’re a worthless dirty old man who cares about nothing more than where the next hooker is going to come from. You made your money and bolted. I don’t want to hear sh*t about anything. You were next in line to take over but you decided to let your c*ck do all the thinking and look where you’re at now. You’re back at the bottom.”

*Thirteen turns his attention back to the crowbar as Z turns and walks out of the mausoleum. After a few moments of prying the stone comes loose and crashes to the ground shattering. A hand reaches out from inside and snatches Thirteen by throat, lifting him off the ground with surprising ease. A single sound floats out from inside.”

“Why……..”

*Camera fades out then back in to the inside of a large mansion where Thirteen walks in the front door. The inside is covered in a thin sheet of dust and cob webs. He walks through the inside, turning a corner into a room with a TV and sticks in a tape. Felix Red comes on the screen and begins talking. The tape ends and Thirteen looks at the camera, his hat still covering his face.*

Thirteen: “How touching Mr. President. You glorify me in your recent promotion, talking about how you destroyed me wasting the company’s money in fines and whatever amount it took for them to promote me. I feel the need to correct you on several circumstances. The first being. I want no part of LOVE. If you invited me into LOVE, I would simply take the opportunity to inflict more insult and punishment upon you. I give you only that yes, you did inflict more upon me than I would have anticipated, and that’s completely fine. I pinned you for the technical win of the match, but I still lost all the while. I wanted to destroy you. I wanted to make sure that when I got done with you all the drugs in the world could not end the unerring pain which you were to feel.

But something stopped me.

I found something I have been searching for for quite some time.

And I brought it back.

P*ss away the company’s money. Destroy and create, talk of beginnings and endings, viruses and plagues. Bring whomever you want whenever you want however you want. But I want you to keep one thing in mind.

I’m not done with you yet.

You may be the company president now. But that will make the embarrassment inflicted upon you that much more. LOVE holds almost all of the belts in the company at the moment, as you so poignantly put it, but this match with Wells will be the beginning of the end of that reign. If I have to personally win each belt and drop it off to some scumbag lowlife and interfere with every match they’re in so that they retain those belts and pull from underneath your nose every bit of everything you and the rest of that accursed group have wrought in this company, then so be it.”

*Thirteen pulls off his hat revealing his face finally which is covered in dirt and dried blood from his last match.*

Thirteen: “I want you to take a good look at me now Felix. I want you to memorize this visage. I want this face to be in the background of every thought you have. You think that Wells is going to desecrate the rotting corpse which you have created. You’re f*cking wrong. You did nothing but give me even more reasons to fight harder. You’ve created a juggernaut that will not be stopped until I have beaten you to the brink of death, just to let the doctors nurse you back to life so I can do it all over again. I’m not like you. I will not destroy you physically or emotionally or spiritually beyond repair so that you are nothing more than an empty shell. I want you to regain your humanity so that every time you pass a shadow on the street, you look behind you fearing that I might step out of them once more to rape you of everything that you’ve ever known. You stand now in the spotlight of LOVE and the presidency. You shine so lovingly bright and crisp at the head of the company, pissing everything away. Never forget that every light casts a shadow. I am the shadow that you now cast.”

*From behind him out of the shadows a man nearly seven feet tall with pale skin and long black hair neatly tied back steps out. He is naked from the waist up, his body rippling with muscles.*

Thirteen: “You have your friends in this federation. Now I have mine. Lets see where this game leads.”

*Pitt smiles sadistically.*

Pitt: “Your move.”

*The camera fades.*

 

[BarryClarkJr]

Bastard Son

(FADEIN: To a hotel balcony towering over Las Vegas as Jared Wells is sitting in a chair with his feet propped up on the rails wearing khakis shorts, black sleeveless Anarky shirt and has a beer in his hand. Crazy Mexican is sitting beside him in another chair propped up perfectly in the chair with blood shot eyes and a little glass table next to him with all kinds of paraphernalia on it)

CRAZY MEXICAN: querer humo algunos crujido?

JARED WELLS: Do I want to smoke some crack? Are you (BLEEP) serious man?

CRAZY MEXICAN: trece! trece!

JARED WELLS: Oh, you asking Thirteen if he wants to smoke some crack?

CRAZY MEXICAN: si!

JARED WELLS: I'm not sure what's sappy here? Ten standing on top of a hill like batman with a cape n all or this dirty little mexican next to me offering you something Thirteen. Your right we could sit here all day playing number games. But why do that? I'd hate to see a grown man cry because he can't get past fourteen. I don't think you understand the situation you've gotten yourself into here.

I'm not sure where your going with whole second grade thing. But if you'd like to venture back to second grade with me, listen up. Sure I had a hard time in second grade. Teachers didn't like me because I was always late. The boys hated me because the girls would always kiss me. I would be the dude that stole your milk. I even sniffed pixie dust through a straw at gym. But does all that really matter on how I go about business today? I don't think so. Well maybe some things but not all. One thing I didn't do is have sex with my second grade teacher. Nah. I didn't do that 'till I got to high school.

I love your "not this, not anymore" attitude rolls into play here. Not do what anymore? Watch the little high schoolers get out of class? As you sit in your beat up 1989 chevy van watching the kids head home. Watching that sixteen year old girl slowly whip her book bag around her back. Psssssst......want some candy little girl? No I won't go into your past because you really don't have one thats worth noticing. I mean if I was a cop I might be looking for you on sexual rape charges on kids but I won't do that. Were 'rasstlers right?

This isn't some title. This isn't a belt mother (BLEEP). It's my title, my life. Being the B.A.D World Heavyweight Champion means your the baddest mother (BLEEP) ever to step foot. Since day one I told the world I was going to take over. Not only did I take over but three others joined me as well. L.O.V.E baby! What makes you think Fifteen that you even have a chance? Your not even deserving of the B.A.D World Title. (BLEEP) you shouldn't even be in the picture. I'm going to rape you of your pride Six. I'm going to take all your dreams, all your goals and burn them right in front of your face. I will call your parents and tell them to watch me whip out my penis and urinate all over you. That's the kind of guy I am. Very professional. So if you think for one second that you really really have a clue, your just a little boy in a big mans world.

CRAZY MEXICAN: 'El presidente Red!

JARED WELLS: Calm down there dirty little dry wall guy. The President started the burial procedure there Twenty. Now I shall finish what you started. Obviously you seem very upset over his actions. Funny how you defeated a star like that but the ending made such an impact that nobody really cared if you won. The fact of the matter is that L.O.V.E ruled. The president ruled. And now I will rule.

Week after Christmas Card, you'll be thinking about a week ago.....

A week ago I had everything.
A week ago I had the spotlight.
A week ago I had the ball.
A week ago I should have been champion.

The week after, you'll be bottom feeding with guys like Shawn Hart, Sean Edmunds, and Scotty Michaels.

It ain't got nothing to do with pride. It's got nothing to do with wrestling. It's about who's the man and who is god.

Me, I'm already the man. And I've already surpassed a god. This is only a pit stop until 2005. What a (BLEEP) up year its gonna be. Just too bad you won't live to see it Thirty-Eight.

To quote a famous song that reminds me of your after life of Christmas Card...

Will the wind ever remember the names it has blown in the past
And with this crutch its old age and its wisdom
It whispers no this will be the last
And the wind cries Thirteen.

(Last shot of the dirty mexican urinating over the balcony)

 

[DmntdDuergar]

Graverobber

*Thirteen is seen sitting at the end of a table. The floor and walls look like they came right out of Castle Frankenstein.*

Thirteen: “Oh Bravo bravo. Let me commemorate you on being the first… no wait… second…”

*Thirteen stops and ponders for a minute.*

Thirteen: “F*ck it. I can’t remember just how many people have called me every number in the English language and beyond. However, this is not Sesame Street. The only number games I play are when I’m finished with you and all you hear is ‘A one, a two, a three’ and you realize that your title just slipped through your cold dead fingers. After all you said all I had to do was kill you to take it, and that’s exactly what I plan on doing. You and your little Mexican can sit there and offer me crack all day long, but bribes don’t work on me. Try that on Felix. I’m not going to offer crack, I’m just going to give it to you. The kind that spans from the middle of your eyeballs down the back of your f*cking head. Perhaps that was a little too graphic for the title. Afterall, with the p*ssy barbed wire that you were talking about I don’t think you could handle the challenge that will be delivered to you. Am I sick and twisted for wanting to open the Mariana’s trench in your skull? Of course not, I just want to see whats really on your mind.

As for you f*cking your second grade teacher, I wouldn’t be surprised if you didn’t f*ck all of them. Hell, if I heard correctly before.. weren’t you home schooled? But lets not insult the education which you received.

Y’know what? I’m feeling in a gracious mood. Lets have a class reunion shall we? I did some digging and found someone you might enjoy meeting again!

*Thirteen hops down off the table and pulls aside the table cloth revealing that it’s really a coffin. He grabs a crowbar and pries the top off, revealing a grotesquely decomposed corpse.*

Thirteen: “Lets take a close look and see who we’ve brought up today…. It looks… like your second grade teacher… wait a minute… I’ll be d*mned. It is your mom.”

*Thirteen spits on the corpse and upturns the coffin spilling the body everywhere.*

Thirteen: “You may think your better than me. You may think that I’m a f*cking pushover, and that you can rape the corpse that Felix has left behind. You may not want to dig into my sordid past to try to find things about me, but I have no f*cking problem digging in your past, your present, and your future. Right now, I am your present. I’ve dug up the past, and I plan on burying your future. I got one thing to say…

Bring it you sonofab*tch. I want it all! I want everything you got!”

*Fades*

 

[BarryClarkJr]

(FADEIN: To the same balcony as Jared is very chilled and the Crazy Mexican Chavez is still stoned out of his mind. Jared seems to be very uncomfortable around the mexican)

JARED WELLS: Oh my god he's retarded. I mean, look at this guy right here. I love watching a rookie step over his own cracks. I love watching a guy getting all wound up for nothing. Look at you Thirteen. What happened to you? Sounds like your going to cry now. Did 'ol Dirty Wells upset somebody? Thats what I do best. My job is to frustrate people like you. You could have a degree in (BLEEP) psychology for all I care. I always find a way to make kids out of wannabe 'rasstlers.

'Ya little gothic parties with thirteen year old girls digging up the families pets is a (BLEEP) thing to do. How do you mix up trying to dig up a corpse of a second grade teacher and say its my mom? Somebody (BLEEP) up. That's not my mom, that Spunky the cat. The neighbors (BLEEP) cat man! But I'd place my entire paycheck that you use that coffin in your bedroom to lure little boys in right? You seem like a sick (BLEEP). You must seek medical help and my little dirty friend the Mexican can help you pal.

I can't even believe I'm even talking to you. Obviously the words did not comprehend into your head there princess. But then again, your in your twenties and still a virgin. Just like Captain Crunch *caughs* Manson, you still get off on prizes in cereal boxes.

You've never dug up my past because it was never buried. My present is immortal and my future is endless. Not matter what you do, no matter what you say, L.O.V.E owns you. I own you. What you've seen in the movies, what you've done to senior citizens ain't (BLEEP) in my world. I am the B.A.D World Heavyweight Champion and I intend to stay the B.A.D World Heavyweight Champion for a long long time. In fact, I'm going on record right now to say I will be the longest reigning B.A.D champion EVVVER. I'm the best at what I do, I talk the (BLEEP), and I will break you down. Whether it's on the microphone or in the ring. Either way

Ohhh open my skull huh? Very original there dude. Want to know what I'm thinking. I'm thinking on if I should do my laundry after Christmas Card. Maybe go out and party it up like I always do. Maybe grab a case of beer and a funnel cake. Smoke some drugs? I'm coming with my belt and L.O.V.E, and this dirty (BLEEP) right here is coming with the half ounce. You looking for somewhere to belong? It won't be here. Not in L.O.V.E's WFW. Not even in my (BLEEP) lifetime.

I am better than you. You are a pushover due to your mouth. Anything else you trying to achieve that hasn't already been done? Get your facts straight, and be a real man, and THEN! THEN I might talk to you. I might even save your life.

I said it once Fifty-Two, if you hear any noise......it's just me and the boys....

...It's L.O mother (BLEEP) .V.E!

(Jared hears a pssst. Looks down onto the table as a pipe is sitting there)

MR PIPE: Hey Jared come over here! Come over here I'll make everything all better.

JARED WELLS: Make everything better huh? How is that?

MR PIPE: Well you haven't picked me up all day Jared. Come on, light it up.

JARED WELLS: No I can't, not today.

MR PIPE: Come on Jared I'll take care of everything. I'll listen to everything you have to say. I'm the only one that cares Jared. Come on Jared we'll show 'em!

(Crazy Mexican Chavez walks over, grabs the pipe and walks off as Jared is just sitting there with a confused look on his face)

 

[DmntdDuergar]

Experiment

*Thirteen is seen standing over the corpse of Well’s mom, staring blankly at it.*

Thirteen: “So this is what a decomposed ***** looks like. Hmm. Too bad your talking about the neighbors cat and I’m talking about the cock socket that spit you out.”

*Thirteen shrugs and walks to a different room in the dungeon.*

Thirteen: “Alright Wells. I give. You got me. I do enjoy having fourteen year old princesses in black clothes and make up over here digging up their family pets to stare at a cat skull and muse on how their life sucks. And then I show them a match with you in it and they realize that their lives really aren’t that pathetic. I will also agree with you to a certain extent that your future will be, butt is not quite yet, immortalized. You will go down in the history books of wrestling as one of the greatest... *pauses for a moment* recipients of the greatest defeats of all time. I don’t plan on winning the match. I don’t plan on winning the belt. All I want to do is destroy you. Plain and simple. I’m tired of hearing “Oh Mr. three point one four one, you eat your cap’n crunch, you jack off with the Disney Cinderella that comes with it, you do this and that, I’m going to sit here and make no sense while repeating everything I’ve already said and spew even more sh*t that you’ve heard before. Blah de blah blah blah.”

As for LOVE owning me… I’ve already technically defeated Felix once. It took, if I’m not mistaken, three of them to defeat me at the Cybernetico, and even then they had to cheat to do it. What makes you think you’re special enough for me to just bend over and fulfill your fantasies? Because you have a title? Because you have to make yourself feel intellectually superior so you hire a Mexican to sit next to you because he’s more entertaining than you are? What the f*ck is wrong with you? And you’re right, the whole skull cracking has been done before. I just figured why not jump on the Wells bandwagon and repeat things that have been done before. I could have gone through the entire list of things I’ve done to others, but they at least were a challenge. After the Christmas card you are gonna need to do some drugs and your laundry. You’ll need the drugs to be able to cope with the defeat which I shall serve you, and your gonna have the wash the blood out of your clothes.

But see.. once again your stating the obvious. Once again your going into things that have been done before, and shall continue to reign in this world as the mediocrity which has destroyed millions. After beating Felix, and listening to his drug induced ramblings, why should anything you spew phase me? C’mon little man, give me something original. Give me something that might actually surprise me. Actually put some thought into your speech.

Or is it perhaps something different all together.”

*Thirteen walks over to a cage where he has a frog sitting.*

Thirteen: “Look at that. Its just as crisp as you were. See the resemblance? Here lemme add something to it to enhance the image.”

*Thirteen puts a pair of sunglasses on the frog.*

Thirteen: “Now look. See what I’m getting at? Your green with envy of me and that’s why you can’t insult me. You worship me in your back yard digging up your neighbors cat trying to figure out which end is the ass so you can try to desecrate it. That’s the only thing I can think of as to why you can’t come up with a decent insult against me. You’re afraid to ruin the visage that you have painted of me for yourself. You’re afraid that if you look any deeper than the black clothes and sh*tty smirks that you might see the oncoming destruction. You’re the one that’s afraid Jared. You can’t stand the fact that I may actually come out on top and begin the snowball which will be yours, Felix Red’s, and the rest of LOVE’s destruction.

Not only that. *looks at the frog* But you both look like sh*t in sunglasses…..”

*Fades*

 

[BarryClarkJr]

Tah Tah Tee Tee Tah

(FADEIN: Jared Wells inside his hotel room getting ready to hit the Vegas Strip as he is all dressed up in Armani clothing. The dirty mexican is sitting on the couch with the same dirty jeans and a brand new 'Mexellence' tee shirt)

JARED WELLS:(Jared claps his hands) Tah-Tah-Tee-Tee-Tah! I never hired Dirty Mexican Chavez, he came to me for work. He happens to lay the best dry wall on the north east. He cuts a mean yard like a mother (BLEEP). Not my fault he likes being around the best. I mean your surrounded with what you create. L.O.V.E just so happens to be the most impact, craziest, (BLEEP) in the world today. Everybody that tried to somewhat put a dent in our ass was proved wrong. Iron Lion, Scotty Michaels, Shawn Hart, Copycat, Sean Edmunds, a ton more. Oh yeah, Thirteen too. L.O.V.E just so happens to lead the market in merchandise. It's good when your great. It's not just L.O.V.E, it's life.

I've already insulted you plenty to the point where you want to break down. What's left now? To finish your "never was" career and turn off the spotlight which showcased you in a one night only thing. Flash in a pan kid.

I could keep going and going on how your worthless. What I do in the ring, what I express, the (BLEEP) picture that I paint will be etched into your mind. And after you'll know I am the best. You think that your signature on that contract makes you famous? In a matter of minutes it will all be gone. As soon as I knock you down they'll find another Thirteen, another Fifteen, another Se7en.

I wanted to be wrestling superstar. I got to take (BLEEP) from people who didn't know what anything was. It's all fun and games to me but the price of fame is high and some can't pay the way Thirteen. I'm the big shot around here. I'm the heavy hitter in this mother (BLEEP).

No fans, no fame, no change, no women and everyone (BLEEP) on your name.

You got a couple choices of what you can do. Better make the right decision if you know what I mean

Of course you don't plan on winning the match. Of course you don't plan on winning the belt. You can't. I won't let you. You have no value what so ever to this belt and along with your gothic (BLEEP), it will get you nowhere. Your very consistent with your lies, and your remake movie characters. No need for me to sweat over it Se7en! Oops. I mean Thirteen. Sorry, usually when I've seen the act before I get the names mixed up.

I'm gonna smack you with my (BLEEP).
I'm gonna smack you with my (BLEEP).
I'm gonna smack you with my (BLEEP).
I'm gonna smack you with my (BLEEP).
I'm gonna smack you with my (BLEEP).
I'm gonna smack you with my (BLEEP).
I'm gonna smack you with my (BLEEP).
I'm gonna smack you with my (BLEEP).
I'm gonna smack you with my (BLEEP).
I'm gonna smack you with my (BLEEP).
I'm gonna smack you with my (BLEEP).
I'm gonna smack you with my (BLEEP).
I'm gonna smack you with my (BLEEP).

Thirteen times.

Now, are you ready to go you dirty bastard?

DIRTY MEXICAN: Si.

(Chavez stands up from the couch, pauses for about ten seconds and then falls right to his face)

(FADEOUT)