November 11, 2001

(CUT TO: The locker room area. Lawrence Stanley is laid out on a massage table, with Lord Alfred and Serf behind him, looking on as a CSWA trainer gives Stanley a rub-down.)

SERF: Mr. Stanley, are you okay? If you aren't, I'll gladly take your place in the mat--

STANLEY : Silence, Serf. I came a matter of inches from being the CSWA World Champ tonight. Do you think that I'd give the likes of YOU a chance to wrestle against Hornet tonight?

TRAINER: Actually, Mr. Stanley, that's not such a bad idea.

ALFRED: (Turns indignantly to the trainer.) What? What could you possibly mean?

TRAINER: Well... after examining Lawrence here... I can't possibly say he can wrestle. His back is in BAD shape from his match against Radder. My initial diagnosis is that he shouldn't wrestle for at least six weeks!

ALFRED: What? No...

STANLEY : (gets up QUICKLY, grimacing in pain as he does.) Doctor, no matter what you say about my back, I can tell you that I will not pay it any attention. This is the biggest night in my career. And when it's over... I want you, Doctor... I want all of these fans in New Orleans ... and I want all of the fans watching at home to know that while Lawrence Stanley may not have a strong back after PRIMETIME... there will be no turning back in his career, because he has become this sports biggest star!

(CUT TO:  Backstage, with a CSWA banner backdropping the set.  With microphone in hand, Rudy Seitzer is standing next to the new Presidential champion, Triple X.  The belt is slung over his shoulder and with his other hand, Trip is holding his neck.)

RS:  Congratulations, Sean, that was an incredible performance you put on out there… Gemini and Wicked Sight were bent on destroying each other and it’s obvious you took advantage of that. 

Trip:  Thanks, Rudy, this gold feels great.  My head… it doesn’t.  Gemini wanted to break my neck… I’m going to see a trainer a minute and see how close he came to doing that.  But if you thought Wicked Sight defended this belt against the biggest, baddest, fastest, and the best… then you’ve seen nothing.  I told Sight I was better than he was, I told him I was BADDER… I’m the Blue Eyed Bad Ass, Rudy…

(From the left side of the screen, Wicked Sight appears, clutching his shoulder.  The look on his face is blank, he can barely stand and there is blood coming from his chin.)

WS:  Triple X… You think you did a good job tonight, bud?

(Sight extends his hand, and both men shake.)

WS:  I’ve given the fans everything I’ve had with that belt, so you can go home and shine it up and prepare to give them one good title defense.  It’ll be a STELLAR title defense, because it’ll be me and you… That belt’s coming back home, real soon, Trip.

Trip:  You are getting another shot… and it will be STELLAR… but Michael…

(Amidst a scream from Rudy Seitzer, a steel chair comes crashing across the back of Triple X’s head, and then the camera turns so that you can see Gemini as he plows into Wicked Sight and both men crash into a small piece of set, taking Sight down.)

Gemini: (Staring down at Triple X) Keep that belt warm, kid, because WE’RE going to take it home the next time we meet you.

(CUT TO:  The announce position.)

BB:  Good grief Sammy, Gemini doesn’t know when enough is enough… word from the back is that trainers are rushing to the aid of Wicked Sight and our new Presidential Champion Triple X…

SB:  And MY sources have just informed me that Gemini is leaving the building!  All I know, is I’m in New Orleans , I have beer and Wicked Sight is NO LONGER the Presidential champion…

(CUT TO:  Backstage, the CSWA camera's happen upon the Internet station, where Havoc is being grilled by CSWA LIVE Internet Reporter Harry Smilek.)

HS: Tonight, Havoc, you'll defend your United States Heavyweight Championship against former US and Tag Champion, 'Good God' Kevin Powers. Kevin Powers' dissatisfaction with his CSWA run has been well publicized, and he has even gone so far as to say that he will RETIRE from the CSWA for good. Havoc, what are your thoughts as we are only moments away from bell time?

HAVOC: I think I've said enough about Kevin Powers and Walking Away. But, to be truthful... I don't envy Kevin Powers in this situation.

HS: Why is that?

HAVOC: Well... here's a man who's convinced he's going to walk out in the near future... I hear he's even got a DATE set, or some nonsense. He KNOWS when he's leaving... and yet... despite all of that... he's still got to get in the ring with me and take what I'm going to give. Every kick I land on him... every fist that crushes jaw... it's going to sink in on Kevin... that maybe TODAY should have been the day to quit... maybe TODAY should have been the day to walk away. I'm not going to paint any pretty pictures for Powers... I don't plan on going easy on him, nor do I plan on letting him "go out" looking good. I'm treating this like any other night... Tonight, I'll look into that man's eyes, and whether they already look beaten or not... I'm going to do what I always do. I'll break his spirit. I'll break his concentration. And then I'll break HIM... Right in Half.

HS: Any comment on the words you've exchanged with 'The Wolf' Mike Randalls?

HAVOC: Comment? Here's a comment: "Whatever". Mike Randalls wants to challenge me? Threaten me? Attack me? Well, let's get ON with it, because all of this talk is useless. I'm not afraid to get my hands dirty, and I'm not afraid to wave my favorite finger at the 'established stars'. If you have a move to make - MAKE it. Don't waste my time with meaningless backtalk and incomprehensible logic. I'm done exchanging... "words" with Mike Randalls.

HS: Anything else?

HAVOC: Powers... it's time for the question to be answered.

(With that, Havoc drops his headset and walks towards the curtain.  CUT TO:  Ringside.)

SB:  I still don’t understand why he was in the IOC…

BB:  We’re getting ready to watch a very healthy United States champion in action…

SB:  That’s a rare sight… Havoc being healthy.

BB:  Well, Sammy, I guess it may be but right now, Havoc is focused and he’s had a lot of time since the Ironman of Champions to rehab his shoulder, which apparently wasn’t hurt as severely as first thought.

SB: Well... enough about Havoc. Because amateur hour is OVER!

(CUE UP: "Voodoo Chile " by Ben HARPER. CUT TO: Eddie Mayfield and Craig Miles, wearing matching leglong trunks, walking down the aisleway, smoking cigarettes but NOT looking cool, instead looking deadly serious. The camera zooms in on Miles.)

MILES: (To the camera, as Eddy yells at a fan with a Simply Stunning sign.) Hey, you two British fairies... you're gonna pay BIG! There ain't NO escaping us now!

BB: Those are some big words from Craig Miles there.

SB: And you can bet that those words WILL be backed up. Michael and Simon attacked The Professionals from behind, like a couple of thieves in the night.

(CUE UP: "Cherub Rock" by The Smashing Pumpkins. CUT TO: Cheezy "Lazer Rush at the Planetarium" style lights flash in and out of the arena. "Hardcore" Jimmy Valentine walks out first, pointing his oversized cellphone at the ring, then cackling sadistically. To his right, clad in a black mask with flourescent orange horns with a matching one-piece bodysuit is TSUNAMI. To his left, bangs over his eyes, adjusting his wrist  tape, is "The Warhorse Kid" Johnny Lang.)

BB: And it was just last month when we saw one of the most sickening acts of all-time, when Tsunami turned on his best friend and longtime tag partner WildStar and helped from The New Suicide Squad.

SB: Another alliance that I'm a big fan of. They'll stop at NOTHING to get what they want.

(SFX: The sound effects of a headset being put on.)

BB: And now, to my dismay, we're being joined at ringside by the mastermind of the attack last week.

JV: Did you miss me, Buckley? Because I sure didn't miss you and your BIASED commentary. Not like the man sitting next to me, the true voice of objectivity, Sammy Benson!

SB: Jimmy, I could kiss you... if I was that type of person... which, contrary to recent Internet reports, I am certainly not!

BB: It's going to be The Warhorse Kid starting the match against Eddy Mayfield, which is an interesting matchup. Why is the newcomer starting a match against such a grizzled veteran?

JV: I have complete and total faith in Johnny Lang. He is an athlete of rare athletic grace and a man of dignity and class... just like myself.

SB: And myself!

BB: Give me a break... Mayfield and Lang are going to lock up-- no, Eddy kicks Lang in the stomach and grabs the trunks from behind blatantly, punching Lang right in the kidneys. Now Mayfield cinches in a sleeper hold of some kind, attempting to wear out the less experienced Lang. How do you feel about that, Jimmy?

JV: Well, Billy, I'm sure you want me to rip into The Professionals. But I won't. I have a lot of respect for Craig Miles and Eddie Mayfield. Especially since they ran Tom Adler out of the sport, a man I could never stand. It's a good challenge for our tag team (Mayfield puts his feet on the ropes and he cinches in the sleeper as Lang struggles.) But I have faith that my men will prevail as victors... just like I have faith in Evan Aho, later on tonight.

SB: Yo, Jimmy-- what gives with Aho dissing you in interviews?

BB: What gives with you speaking in urban cadence?

JV: I'll just ignore Buckley like the majority of CSWA fans do and dignify you, Sammy. Evan Aho is a great wrestler, but he's a little confused inside. He's not the brightest man I've ever met. But he'll smarten up when he sees his next paycheck, because I'm going to make him a LOT of money.

BB: Lang is getting back to his feet now, and he elbows Mayfield in the stomach to get out of the sleeper. And now Lang bounces off the rope and takes Mayfield down with a lariat-style clothesline.

JV: You'll be hardpressed to find a better lariat clothesline in the sport today. Johnny Lang is a man on a mission!

SB: I wish you'd call the play by play, Jimmy. We need a man with your skills here.

BB: I'll just ignore you two. Lang is now working on Mayfield's arm, twisting it around, causing Mayfield to flair around the mat.

SB: Lang gives off that Johnny Depp vibe... I know all about that, because I give off the same aura myself-- which gets me a lot of action.

JV: You are a handsome man, Sammy.

BB: As the mutual admiration society continues here, Johnny Lang now has Eddie Mayfield up and he wrings the arm, spinning it into a hammer lock... Lang now HOISTS Mayfield from a chicken-wing position and drops back in a suplex with a cradle! 1....2....no, Eddie rolls out.

SB: It's going to take a LOT more than that to take out the great Hot Property.

JV: I'm confident in The Warhorse Kid, Sammy. He's a great athlete and he's well-versed in many styles of wrestling. His partner, Tsunami, is of course a legend in this industry. And our ally, Evan Aho, despite not being the smartest wrestler, is a great athlete. We've all picked up a lot from each other.

BB: Aho now targeting Mayfield's arm with a series of well-placed boots... Lang now snapmares Hot Property over and he tags in Tsunami, and Mayfield hightails it out of the corner... he does NOT want any part of Tsunami.

JV: And who in their right mind would? Tsunami is THE most lethal athlete in the sport of wrestling. He'll do anything to win a match...even if it means he breaks his own body in two.

BB: Mayfield tags in HIS partner, Craig Miles... who climbs into the ropes and is staring at Tsunami... these two have done battle before in various tag team matches in the past.

SB: But I don't think Craig Miles really cares about a sense of history right now.

BB: Craig Miles just pointed at Tsunami, and now he's making karate poses, mocking the Japanese superstar.

JV: As much as I respect The Professionals... you do NOT disrespect Tsunami.

BB: Craig Miles turns around and OHNO! He just got met with a savate kick right to the face! And Tsunami cocks back... and he strikes Cocky Craig AGAIN with one of those massive kicks!

JV: Those kicks are deadly.

SB: I agree completely, but I wish Tsunami would save them to fight the real enemy... Simply Stunning. You guys and The Pros should get along and carve those turkeys up.

BB: Tsunami now props Craig Miles up and he runs, and hops on the second rope and bounces offff---- CRAIG MILES JUST HIT TSUNAMI WITH A COCKYLINE CLOTHESLINE THAT JUST FLOORED THE POSTERBOY!

SB: Speaking of deadly!

JV: Come on, 'Nami...

BB: Miles is the first to his feet, but Tsunami twists around and grabs Miles by the waist and runs towards the corner-- BUT MILES JUST BUMPED INTO REFEREE PEE WEE TROUTMAN!

SB: And look at the twinkle in Eddie Mayfield's eye!

JV: And look at the twinkle in Johnny Lang's eye!

BB: Mayfield now hops into the ring, as does Lang and the two start to exhange a series of Mongolian chops! Lang gets the advantage, chopping Mayfield into the corner. And Tsunami has Miles up in the corner, delivering a series of those trademarked karate chops!

JV: We have an opportunity here for a big win... WHERE IS EVAN AHO?

SB: Not to be confused with the "Wooo" style knife-edged chops.

BB: Tsunami and Lang whip The Professionals into the ring-- DO SI DO-- but The New Suicide Squad members both dropkick The Pros!

JV: WHERE IS AHO?

BB: Eddie Mayfield rolls out of the ring... a little bit of miscommunication, as Tsunami has Miles and Lang doesn't know where Mayfield is.

SB: That's the inexperience in this tag team coming into play.

BB: Lang finally rolls out to meet Mayfield and-- WHAT'S THAT SMELL? SOMETHING STINKS!

SB: That's Hot Property's bag of tricks... or shall I say, an ether-soaked rag coming from his trunks! Ha, you gotta love that!

JV: And again, I ask... WHERE IS EVAN AHO?

BB: In the ring, Tsunami has Miles up-- HE JUST SPIKED CRAIG MILES WITH A MICHINOKU DRIVER! Now Tsunami is on the ring apron...  AND MAYFIELD JUST SHOVED THAT RAG OF POISON INTO JOHNNY LANG'S FACE! JOHNNY LANG IS OUT COLD!

JV: I thought this was a TEAM here.

BB: What's Tsunami doing... he bounces to the top rope... OOOHHHHHHHHH! (The crowd goes NUTS.) SPRINGBOARD SHOOTING STAR PRESS! HE CALLS THAT THE TSUNAMI SPECIAL! BUT TROUTMAN IS OUT COLD! HE CAN'T MAKE THE COUNT!

SB: And Hot Properts sees that!

JV: Evan Aho... WHERE ARE YOU?

BB: Mayfield reaching into his trunks again... now he's wrapping a chain around his fist! Mayfield is climbing to the top! MAYFIELD DELIVERS A FIST DROP FROM THE TOP TO TSUNAMI'S HEAD! And now Mayfield rolls Miles on top of Tsunami...

SB: What Professionals!

JV: This is ALL Evan Aho's fault! I've got to speak to him... (Jimmy throws down the headset and walks back.)

BB: Troutman makes the cover! 1...... 2...... 3! Eddie Mayfield and Craig Miles have somehow managed to STEAL a victory from The New Suicide Squad!

SB: You gotta love it! The Professionals are so resilient a tag-- (The lights go completely out cold-- and the arena ERUPTS, with a lot of people holding lighters to see what is happening.)

BB: CHAOS HAS ERUPTED HERE! IT'S BLACK AS NIGHT IN HERE? WHO KILLED THE LIGHTS? WHAT'S GOING ON--

(The lights come back on, and NATHAN STORM is holding a chair, hitting Craig Miles from behind with it.)

BB: THAT'S NATHAN STORM! THAT'S NATHAN STORM! MILES IS HOLDING HIS BACK, AND EDDIE MAYFIELD IS BESIDE HIMSELF!

SB: LOOK FROM BEHIND!

BB: THAT'S THE TAG TEAM KNOWN AS RAW DEAL! THEY JUST CROWNED LANG WITH A CHAIR! AND NOW THEY HAVE TSUNAMI SET UP---- TOTAL ELIMINATION! TSUNAMI WAS JUST BEHEADED!

SB: I THINK WE ALL KNOW WHO IS BEHIND ALL OF THIS!

BB: MAYFIELD IS PUNCHING AWAY ON NATHAN STORM, BUT HE JUST GOT WAYLAYED BY THE MEMBERS OF RAW DEAL! AND LOOK DOWN THE AISLEWAY!

SB: MR. MAGNIFICENT HAS RETURNED! TOM ADLER IS BACK! (CUT TO: Tom Adler, in street clothes, with a REAL smug look on his face as he looks at the carnage.)

BB: ADLER IS CHOKING MAYFIELD! RAW DEAL NOW HAS MILES SET UP... TOTAL ELIMINATION ON CRAIG MILES! NATHAN STORM IS CLEARING A TABLE ON THE FLOOR! ADLER IS COMMANDING THEM TO SEND MILES OUT THERE!

SB: This does NOT look good for my heroes!

BB: Raw Deal is punching Miles, who is already out cold. Adler is wailing away on Mayfield, who is helpless! And Raw Deal now has Miles out on the table... And Nathan Storm is on the ring apron! (The crowd is on its feet, applauding already.)

SB: NO! WHAT IS HE DOING?

BB: STOOOORM!!!! (SFX: Nathan Storm crashing through the table.) NATHAN STORM JUST SPRINGBOARDED FROM THE TOP ROPE AND HIT A MOONSAULT THROUGH THAT TABLE! CRAIG MILES IS OUT! CRAIG MILES IS OUT COLD! THIS CROWD CANNOT BELIEVE IT!

(Tom Adler spits on Mayfield and rolls out of the ring, snatching a house mic in the process. Raw Deal is walking with Nathan Storm, who is holding his ribs. All four pose on the rampway, as Adler begins to talk.)

ADLER: You know, the last time I was in New Orleans (the crowd SHRIEKS) Mike Randalls and I damn near killed each other for nothing more than pride... and there are still blood stains on the carpet at the Hyatt Hotel and shotgun holes in the walls to show for it. And maybe it was the thought of overseeing another match just like it that caused Schmid to lose his heart three years ago, I don't know. But you, Mayfield, were given a free pass when the league closed down. You were given another one when I chose not to go back to the AAWC when it reopened, and you were given your LAST one here tonight.  When you're standing there looking down on your partner in a hospital bed tonight, do it knowing that the only thing that kept you from being right there with him was because -I- allowed it. A gift that you won't get again. Now, as for the three men here with me? Mayfield, you don't need to ask why they wanted to be here tonight. While the rest of the world may wonder, you know. Miles... I want you to remember the last thing you saw tonight. The sight of this man (Adler points to Storm, who holds his arm in the air, hunched over still) coming down on you... I want you to feel it every time you take a breath with those cracked ribs... and then look at Mayfield and know that behind him lies the cause of it (crowd starts chanting STORM STORM STORM) Now, Suicide Squad, I don't suspect that it's gonna do much good to tell you that you just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time... but you were. But just remember this... YOU had a choice. You could have walked away. You made the wrong one. These two men (Adler motions to Raw Deal, who are staring intently at the ring) aren't gonna be too difficult to find if you wanna make another one. Mayfield... your time is coming... SOON! (Adler and his gang walk off to loud noise, mixed with boos and cheers.)

BB: Fans, I think it's safe to say that Tom Adler... regarded as one of the all-time greats... is back!

SB: And I wish he'd go away already!

BB: Fans, we have a LOT to clean up here. We'll be back as soon as we can. (CUT TO: Eddie Mayfield, holding his back, attending to Craig Miles, who is being placed onto a stretcher. FADE OUT.)

(CUT TO: The back. Craig Miles is on a stretcher, and Eddie Mayfield, shaken up himself, is spouting off words of encouragement.)

MAYFIELD: Hey Craig-- Craig! Yo man, can you hear me?

(Triumphantly, Miles lifts his hand up in the Richard Nixon "V." The ambulance squad continues to roll him into the ring.)

MAYFIELD: We'll get them, Craig! This smokes for you! (Mayfield lights up a cigarette and he raises his hands and yells off to the ambulance.) STELLLLLLAAAAAA!

(CUT TO: Evan Aho, wrapping on wrist tape in his locker room. "Hardcore" Jimmy Valentine walks up to him, tapping him on the shoulder.)

JV: You know, AHO... we could have really USED you out there when we were attacked!

AHO: Jimmy, like I told you before... I'm not a member of the Suicide Squad. I'm not a member of The Professionals. Or the Playboys. Or the ClaimStakers. I'm not a member of ANYTHING...  (Aho pushes Jimmy aside and walks past him.) I'm Evan Aho...  (Aho points at the camera, and the crowd responds with a HUGE pop.) And I'm a wrestler! (Aho walks off.)

SB:  What a goof.

BB:  Fans...we'll be right back.