Part Four

December 26, 2001

(CUE UP:  "Freak on a Leash" -- Korn)

BB:  We're back, and this crowd is on it's feet as Steve Radder walks onto the rampway and hoists that CSWA World Championship belt high above his head. He’s holding his side slightly from that attack by Cardigo, but he looks ready to go!

SB: Frosty is a disgrace to that title.

BB: I don’t think so, Sammy. It’s true, Radder isn’t larger than life like Deacon or Hornet were, he’s not as obsessively focused as Eli Flair, he’s not as arrogantly confident as Eddy Love…. And I don’t think he needs to be. Steve Radder is the CSWA World Champion because he made the most of the opportunity to win it, and because he has the drive, the desire, and the ability. I’ve heard a few of the boys refer to him by that old John Lennon song, “Working Class Hero.”

SB: Hey, I think it’s great that he got his shot and all, but do you really expect me to put him on the same level as Eddy?

BB: Shaddup, Sammy.

(CUE UP: “Blood, Milk, and Sky” – White Zombie)  

BB: Speaking of getting a shot, Sammy, what’s your opinion of Evan Aho?

SB: Eh. Nothing against Aho, but I don’t see how he deserves a World Title shot. He just lost the Greensboro Title to Shane Southern. Or is this another case of ‘official rankings not being released yet’?

BB: Cute, Sammy. Steve Radder's had an open challenge out there to all-comers, and it looks like Aho will be the one to take him up on it.  This should be a great match. Both of these men are skilled mat technicians, though I think the edge in actual mat wrestling would have to go to Aho. This man is driven to be the perfect wrestler, Sammy.

SB: No, he certainly does NOT want to be Eddy.

BB: There’s the bell, and these two superb athletes circle each other. Neither man wants to make the first mistake. They lock up, and Radder with a standing side headlock. Aho tests his grip, seeing how well it’s on. He’s looking for a way out.

SB: If he can’t find his way out of a side headlock….

BB: Aho sends Radder into the ropes, and off to the opposite side! Radder back with a shoulderblock, and Aho goes down! Radder off again, and Aho with a drop toe hold! He moves to the headlock, but Radder reverses into an armbar! Listen to the fans, Sammy!

SB: So they’re applauding. Yippee.

BB: Aho to a knee, and a roll- through reverses the armbar! He locks Radder’s ankle between his knees and takes the champ down! Radder rolls through and kicks Aho back, and both men are back to their feet! What a display of hold-counterhold wrestling we’ve seen so far!

SB: Booooooring!

BB: Radder offers his hand and Aho shakes, and they lock up again! He hooks the arm and takes Aho down, and a quick cover! ONE…. TWO…. Kickout by Aho! You’re not gonna get him that easily!

SB: I’m surprised nobody’s thrown a punch yet.

BB: These two men are professionals, Sammy. They’ve had quite an impressive match so far, I don’t think they’re going to degenerate to fisticuffs.

SB: So what good are they?

BB: Radder hooks Aho around the waist…. Picks him up…. Aho hooked his head and brought him down HARD with a chinbreaker! Radder staggers back, and Aho takes the initiative with a bulldog! Scoop and a slam! He picks the champ up and sends him into the ropes, coming off the other side! Aho with a flying forearm! NO! Radder rolled through, Aho hit nothing but air! Radder trying to shake the effects of Aho’s attacks so far, clearing out some of those cobwebs!

SB: Those cobwebs are his brains, he’d best hold onto ‘em.

BB: Stop it, Sammy.

SB: Why?

BB: Because I can have Hortense here in less than ten minutes.

SB: Shutting up, sir.

BB: Radder back to his feet, as is Aho. But Aho is facing away from him! Radder with a running start, and a clothesline that sends both men over the top rope to the floor!

SB: Is that an automatic DQ?

BB: Hasn’t been for a few years now, Sammy, but Ben Worthington starts the count! Aho is back to his feet first, and he enters the ring and runs to the opposite side!

SB: He’s scared.

BB: Radder is up, and Aho with a baseball slide! He caught the champ right in the face! Radder falls back, and Aho climbs to the top turnbuckle! Worthington continues his count, he’s at three!

SB: Stay down, Radder! You’ll keep the belt!

BB: Radder is climbing to his feet, Sammy! He’s a fighter, there’s no question about it. There’s not a single quitting bone in his body. Aho with a bodypress from the top rope! NO! Radder saw him in time! POWERSLAM! I can’t believe Radder was able to catch him with it! Aho is down, he may be out!

SB: Slide in, Radder! You’ll keep the belt!

BB: I thought you hated Radder. Why do you want him to keep the belt?

SB: I don’t, but if he was smart he’d take the easy way out.

BB: There’s no such thing for Steve Radder. This is the man who wrestled Mark Vizzack to an hour draw. The man who didn’t take a single backstep against Dante Inferno. The man who took Eli Flair to his limits on numerous occasions. Radder’s a fighter.

SB: All guts, no brains.

BB: Radder picks Aho up and slides him back into the ring, stopping the count at seven. He hooks the leg, ONE…. TWO…. Foot on the ropes! Aho had the presence of mind to lash out with his foot and try to catch the bottom rope, and he was able to! Radder scoops him, and hits a suplex! The cover, ONE…. TWO…. THR—Kickout!  Another suplex, Aho blocked it! He rolls Radder up!

SB: Don’t tell me the Borg has anything left!

BB: The cover, ONE…. TWO…. Radder reverses! ONE…. TWO…. Aho kicked out! Radder hooks him, german suplex pin! ONE…. TWO…. Aho rolled through and hooked the legs! ONE…. TWO…. Radder flipped him! ONE…. TWO…. Kickout! These fans are on their feet, Sammy! They’re seeing a veritable showcase of technical wrestling today!

SB: I’m enthralled, Buckley. Wake me up when a drunk female fan pulls her shirt off.

BB: Radder has Aho’s head hooked, and there’s a fisherman’s suplex! ONE…. TWO…. Kickout! He pulls Aho to his knees – forearm from Aho! And another! There’s some fight in the challenger yet! He sends Radder into the ropes – reversal by the champ! He telegraphed a backdrop! DDT by Evan Aho! He’s not following through, however!

SB: There’s a nice pair of boobs…. Ew! It’s a man! It’s man-teats! I need a drink!

BB: If you’d pay attention to the match you wouldn’t see these things.

SB: What’s your point?

BB: Aho and Radder are both regaining their composure from the past few minutes of reversals. They turn toward each other, and they’re nodding in approval! I think there’s a level of respect passing here that we see too infrequently in this business. They lock up—NO! Radder slipped through Aho’s grasp and gets behind him! He locks on the Kata Hajime!

SB: Otherwise known as the Tazzmiss—

BB: What wrestling promotion do you think you work for?

SB: At least I didn’t make any references to young girls and their endowments. Yet.

BB: Please. Radder’s got that hold locked on tightly, and he’s fighting Aho to the mat! Worthington is right there looking for signs of submission from Aho, and you know his mind is working feverishly on a way out of this! He’s gotta be in a lot of pain right now, as Radder hooks his waist! It’s all but over, folks.

SB: All the better for Eddy to take the belt again.

BB: Is there ANYONE else you ever want to see hold the title?

SB: Who else is there?

BB: Aho is struggling, but he’s gotta face reality. He’s gotta submit, avoid injury ,and come back another day. WAIT! Worthington with a count? ONE…. TWO…. Aho wasn’t struggling, he was getting momentum to roll Radder’s shoulders to the mat! He rolls all the way through, however, and is able to hook the bottom rope with his feet! Ingenious! Radder holds on for a four-count, but then he releases the hold. I’m impressed with both men, Sammy! How about you?

SB: What?

BB: Forget it.

SB: What?

BB: Hortense? I know you’re backstage right now.

SB: ….

BB: Radder hooks Aho by the head – Aho hooks Radder by the knee! He pulls the champ down, and locks on an ankle lock! He pulls Radder to the center of the ring! The champ has gotta be in pain, Sammy!

SB: Can you say anything else?

BB: Radder rolls into it, and releases the pressure! No! Aho twists his leg, and hooks on a single- leg Boston Crab! The resourcefulness of both these men is something to marvel at!

SB: Blah, blah, blah.

BB: **smacks Sammy on the back of the head**

SB: Ow! That’s the last time, Buckley!

BB: Radder is struggling against the hold, Sammy! I can’t even say that either man is in trouble, because they’ve both proven their resilience to me and to this crowd tonight! Radder is reaching back…. He hooked Aho’s far leg! The hold is broken, and Radder applies his own version of the single leg Boston! Aho breaks the hold in similar fashion, and Radder plunges forward, hitting his head on the bottom turnbuckle!

SB: C’mon, Aho! Hit a bronco buster!

BB: I don’t think Evan Aho is the Bronco Buster type, Sammy. He grabs the champion’s leg and pulls him to the center of the ring! Figure-four leglock! These fans are cheering for both men here, Sammy!

SB: Can’t they make up their mind? “Let’s Go, Evan! Let’s Go Steve!” It’s annoying!

BB: Radder’s doing his best to turn the figure four over…. But Aho is fighting the whole way! Radder just shifted his weight all the way to the other side, and Aho couldn’t counter fast enough! The figure four is turned over, and Aho is in considerable pain! Another roll over and they’re in the ropes, and Ben Worthington untangles the two from each other. Radder rolls to the center of the ring and Aho rolls to the outside, and they both have quite a limp in their step now, both trying to walk it off.  

SB: Okay, I’ll admit it.

BB: What?

SB: This match isn’t half bad.

BB: We’re thrilled you’re happy.

SB: But it’s not half good, either. It needs a Playboy.

BB: Ben Worthington with the count on Aho, but he’s in no danger of being counted out. He’s on his feet, and he seems to be able to move around without much trouble. Radder is much the same, and he’s simply waiting for his challenger to return to the ring. Aho climbs the stairs slowly – wait, Sammy…. He’s holding his knee.

SB: All this, and the match ends when Aho has a boo-boo? Are you kidding me?

BB: Worthington checking on him, asking him if he wants to continue – RADDER WITH A DROPKICK! GOOD GRIEF! Sammy, Evan was just dropkicked off the ring apron, and he went crashing through the timekeeper’s table! Oh my…. He looks like he landed on the back of his neck and shoulders! He’s not moving, Sammy!

SB: Hey, at least it wasn’t Pedro and Eduardo losing their table. That’s gotta be a first.

BB: It’s not funny, Sammy, he could be seriously hurt! Radder goes out and picks him up, he’s gonna send him back into the ring. Wait…. As Radder was climbing back into the ring himself, Aho rolled to the outside, and he’s down on one knee, at least partially held up by the ring steps. He’s tenacious, Sammy, and he’d apparently rather be counted out than be pinned.

SB: Radder’s gotta finish him off. Wham, bam, thank you Aho.

BB: Radder reaches through the ropes this time and pulls Aho up by the hair, pulling him into the ring with the champ. He pulls Aho to the middle of the ring – listen to the fans! They want to see it! He signals for the Absolute Zero…. Here we go!

SB: It’s certainly no Hurricane Piledriver.

BB: Aho fought his heart out tonite, he has nothing to be ashamed of. WAITASECOND! AHO HOOKED RADDER! SMALL PACKAGE! ONE! TWO! THREE!

(CUE UP: “Blood, Milk, and Sky” – White Zombie)

SB: What the hell just happened?

BB: I can’t believe what just happened! When Radder hoisted Aho up for the Absolute Zero, Aho hooked his head and was able to roll him up for the three count! Evan Aho is lying motionless in the middle of the ring, but the fact remains, he had enough left in him to hold Radder down! And we have a new CSWA World Heavyweight Champion, and his name is EVAN AHO!

SB: You can bet this is gonna toss ANNIVERSARY’s shape into a tailspin.

BB: Ben Worthington drapes the title belt over Aho’s chest, and Steve Radder looks incensed! He’s talking very animatedly with Worthington, but there’s nothing that can be done. Radder takes a long look at Evan Aho, just beginning to stir, and he leaves the ring. You can bet he’s not happy, but you can also bet he’s going to hold that title again someday soon.

SB: Not if Eddy has anything to say about it.

BB: Evan Aho has sat up very slowly in the ring, and he sees the belt lying in his lap…. He’s speechless, Sammy! And we’ve still got another match to go!  Fans, we'll be right back!

BB:  As we return to PRIMETIME here in New Orleans, it looks like we're about to get a visit from the owner.

(A modified version of "Hail To The Chief" begins to play.)

SB:  Maybe he's coming down here to toss you for hitting me earlier.

BB:  (hums)

SB:  What are you doing?

BB:  Humming Hortense and the LOVE Sisters latest hit...

SB:  Message received.

(CSWA Owner Chad Merritt takes the steps into the ring where a podium, with a CSWA logo emblazoned on the front, has been placed.)

CM:  Fans, I hope you're having a great time tonight here at CSWA PRIMETIME!  (crowd pop)  And let me be the first to congratulate our NEW CSWA World Heavyweight Champion, EVAN AHO!  (The TV wall shows a still-speechless Aho being showered in beer...apparently no one had champagne... by some of the CSWA wrestlers and staff.)  As you all know by now, we finish up the year on New Year's Eve with CSWA ANNIVERSARY 2001. (Another crowd pop.)  And there in Greensboro, North Carolina, at the CSWA's first home, the Merritt Auditorium, I think we've got something lined up that's going to be very special.

In a warmup that everyone...well, at least they, have been looking forward to, JJ Deville and "Luscious" Lance Leizure will go at it one-on-one in a StreetFight.

The Unified World Tag Team Titles will be on the line when Simply Stunning defends their titles against The New Suicide Squad, The Professionals and Raw Deal in a four-way HOUSE OF PAIN match.  The rules are simple, the way to eliminate your opponents is to handcuff them to the cage.  As long as one team member remains uncuffed, the team stays in the match.

We've got a tremendous amount of talent ready to step up to the next level here in the CSWA.  Men like the Presidential Champ XXXstasy and our Greensboro Champion Shane Southern.  Rather than put them in one-on-one battles at ANNIVERSARY with just their titles on the line, I'm gonna make the stakes a bit higher.  Triple X and Shane Southern will be involved in a Top Contenders match along with Wicked Sight, Cameron Cruise, Tom Adler and Gabriel Poe.  This six-man elimination event is simple: to eliminate an opponent, you either pin him or send him over the top rope, battle royal style.  The last man standing gets the first shot at the CSWA World Championship after ANNIVERSARY.

And now we come down to some of my favorites.  I've been accused of showing some favoritism, both positive and negative, in the last couple of months...so I'm going to show you just how fair I can be.

I've noticed that things don't seem to be settled between Troy Windham and Eli Flair.  Well I'm going to help those two gentlemen remedy that... inside a steel cage at ANNIVERSARY.

It seems like Eddy Love and Mike Randalls seem to have some unsettled beef as well.  So I'm going to make this as simple for you as I can, cause I know Randalls doesn't pick up real fast.  At ANNIVERSARY, you two will face off in a Mystery Tag Team match.  That's means that you each get to choose a tag team partner that won't be revealed until the pay-per-view.  However, there's another twist.  Love may not choose Troy Windham as his partner, and Randalls may not choose his former ClaimStaker buddies, Hornet and Flair.  Other than that... the roster's open to whoever you can convince.  And if you can't convince anybody...well, then I guess it'll be a good old-fashioned two-on-one.

And that brings me to the last couple of matches.  With the sudden retirement of US Champion Havoc, I've got to figure out what to do with the United States Champion.  I thought about an eight-man tournament... I thought about a battle royal... and then I thought, honestly, why not put two of the best US Champions we've ever had in the ring against each other.  And while many of you probably wouldn't believe it, I do consider Hornet one of those men.  And who better to put him against than Lawrence Stanley, a tremendous US Champ in his own right... not to mention the fact that he has a bone to pick with the aforementioned Hornet.  And don't forget these two... I'm not quite done with them yet.

And then there's the Main Event... or what everybody expected to be the big match for the CSWA World Heavyweight Championship.  Kevin Powers earned his shot by defeating Cardigo at SHOWTIME in Dallas... not to mention another hundred matches or so before that.  You all know that Powers hasn't kept his poor opinion of me secret, and that's he's determined to retire after ANNIVERSARY.  Well, "Good God's" not only going to get his chance at glory... I'm going to give him a chance to go out with a bang.  Powers challenges CSWA World Champion Evan Aho (crowd pop) in his first title defense.  Well, I'm gonna give Evan a chance to prove that tonight was no fluke.

Following the matches between Stanley and Hornet for the US Title, and Aho and Powers for the CSWA World Title, we're gonna finish things off with one more good old-fashioned encore.  The CSWA World Title will be on the line for a SECOND time that night, with the winner of Aho vs. Powers defending the title against the United States Champion.  (crowd pop)  It's as simple as that.  Two men like Stanley and Aho get their chance to cement their recent rise to fame here in the CSWA.  And the two old standards get to try and prove that they've still got what it takes.  I don't know what's gonna happen.... but I know it's gonna be something none of us want to miss.

With that said, folks... I hope you've enjoyed this evening so far.  And now, Rhubarb, why don't you get us ready for the MAIN EVENT!  (big crowd pop)

PART FIVE (and the Main Event) coming ASAP!

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