"Bobby Karma has GOLD Fever"

[Hell_Fighter]

::Fade In...

Location: Rome, Georgia...
Time: Now...
Setting: Bobby Karma's residents...


"Yeah, that's what I'm talkin about. That's why I'm the champ B*(FCCbeep)*tch!"

"Okay whatever Stickyfingers, its not like you've just won the CSWA Unfied Title from Troy Windom or something, it's just Def Jam Fight Fight for New York."

"Play ya again?"

"Of course."

"You know that I'll beat you again."

"Keep the trash coming and I'll cram it down your throat."

[The scene opens inside a house where we see professional wrestling independant free agent Bobby Karma, known around numerous unknown little indy circuits as "What Goes Around, Comes Around" Bobby Karma. Until now, this young aspiring hopeful has been working and gaining experience on pro wrestling circuits all across the Southern Territories. Although he has displayed incrediable in-ring abilities with an uncanny natural overflowing charisma, and a unique gift to work the mic. This young wrestling prodigy has yet to receive the call from "the big time". However, he has managed to save his earnings and has a nice little nestegg saved up for him. He is by far from "millionare" status, but at the same time has more than enough that keeps a nice roof over his head, gives him plenty to eat, and nice clothes on his back.]

[A native southern boy from Rome, Georgia. Bobby Karma is a very handsome and charismatic fellow. Although he kind of speaks with a somewhat fairly thick southern accent, but don't let that fool you about him as he is still quite elequent in his speech. He has long flowing natural platinum blond hair, gray eyes, and fair white skin. Although he is pretty short compared to the average professional wrestler, he does have a naturally toned physique standing at about 5'9 ft and weighing in approx. 245 pounds. He is wearing black with red trim Umbro shorts, a tight nylon white speedo tanktop, and Asaics tennis shoes.]

[We see Bobby and another fellow sitting on their sofa holding X-Box controllers playing on their X-Box, the EA game, Def Jam: Fight For New York in exabition mode.]

[The young gentlemen sitting next to him on the couch is his good friend Freddie Meriweather. This guy you might say kind of looks and could pass for a relative of famed ECW announcer, Joey Styles. Except Freddie has long jet black hair pulled back into a ponytail and has a thick buschy gotee. He does wear small wire framed glasses on his face. However, he is much shorter than Bobby as he is almost around 4'11 to 5'0 foot range, and looks like he weights in at a wobbing 110 pounds. Although he is small in stature, he makes up for in brain and heart, but most of all, he makes up for...in MOUTH as you can hear him very clearly. Call it a "napoleon complex" but Freddie knows wrestling and knows it very well. Freddie is dressed right now light brown baggy cargo shorts, leather sandles, and a button-up shiney shirt with all kinds of flashy catchy trendy tribal designs all over it.]

[As they are playing on their X-Box, the voice of an individual can be heard but not seen in the background.]

"Bobby, you've got mail."

[Bobby responds accordingly while he is still playing on the X-Box intently with Meriwheather.]

"Okay mom, I'll get it in a minute after I'm done with this fight. Who's it from?"

"I think that its from one of your wrestling promotion thingies sent you something. Its a really big envelope."

[Bobby Karma & Freddie Meriweather immediately stop what their playing paused in a moment of silence. They look at each other. Suddenly Bobby and Freddie toss the controllers high into the air and take off running down the hall toward the play where Bobby's mom had the mail. Luckily his mom sensed them running and got out of the way of the stampede.]

"No running in the house boys." [His mom orders off in the distance unseen by the public eye.]

[Bobby grabs the large gold envelope with the CSWA stamped logo and address of their headquarters on it. Bobby rips opens the golden envelope and pulls out the papers beginning by reading the opening cover letter typed out and written by CSWA owner Chad Merritt himself.]

"What he say?" [Freddie urging Bobby to read the note aloud.]

"Shhhhhhh!" [Bobby begins reading the note as he walks slowly down the hall toward his bedroom.]

From: Chad Merritt; co-founder, owner, and president of the CSWA

To: "What Goes Around, Comes Around" Bobby Karma and his manger friend "Light As A Feather" Freddie Meriweather

Dear Bobby,

Thank you very much your expressed interest in wanting to join the CSWA, as you know that we have a rich and renouned history in sports entertainment.


[Bobby stops reading for a moment, and ponders to himself.]

"Wait a minute, I don't remember sending anything to the CSWA."

"Ah yeah, I think I am to blame for this. I'm the one that sent in an application and tape on your behalf Bobby. I felt that you were wasting away on the indy scene and had to do something. So I acted on your behalf and took care of it."

[Freddie explained to his long time friend.]

"You did this? I don't know what to say."

"Well you can start by keep reading and don't get all mushy just yet."

"Oh yeah, right."

[Bobby continues reading the letter.]

"We received your application and your tape, and we must say that it is quite impressive as it is safe to say that we liked what we saw. It must of been an honor to have worked a program with the great Arn Anderson. Too bad it was a non wrestling type of feud, but still we acknowledge that it must of been a great honor to work in a program with such a great man like Mr. Anderson whom if I recall is from the same town in Georgia as you Bobby. You should be very proud."

"We here at CSWA headquarters have reviewed your application and the tape provided. You couldn't have come at a better time as we are in the stages and are just beginning our annual CSWA GoldRush Tournament. We feel that this will not only be a great opportunity for you as you will be pitted with many well established superstars, but who knows fate might even have it to where you could even come out on top and maybe crowned the NEW CSWA UNIFED WORLD CHAMPION.

"All of our champions will take part in this compeition from Greensburo Champion JA, Presidental Champion Jay Phoenix, US Champion Kin Hiroshi, or our very own CSWA Unified Champion, Troy Windom, and all of their titles are on the line. Hence the name Gold Rush Tournament. Mulitple rings with the Champions at the top and you are invited."

"Even if you do not win, we will evaluate your progress and pending on how you wrestle, we will grant you a contract to wrestle with the CSWA on a more long term basis. We look very forward to having you to be apart of the CSWA family."

"Enclosed in the gold envelope, you will find a copy of the short term contract that we have provided that will allow you to compete in the Gold Rush Tournament. This contract will also provide the amount of money you will be paid for during your time in the Gold Rush Tournament."

"May I conclude with saying good luck in the tournament and hope that you will consider joining the CSWA family."

Yours Truly,


Chad Merritt
CSWA President


[Freddie Meriweather pulls out the copy of the contract enclosed. His eyes grow wide at the look of how much.]

"Dude...take a look at this. There's like...

1..2...3...4...

"Dude, like four zeros. That's like more than all of your little bookings put together combined and multiplied by like 4."

"Man, it can't be that much your messin." [Bobby correcting his friend's boast.]

"I'm not good at math, but I know this is a lot of money their wanting to offer you to compete in this tournament." [Freddie tries to point out to Bobby the specified amount stated.]

"Its not like money Time Warner was shelling out in Atlanta...I'll betchya that it would be like pocket change for someone like Troy Windem...OH MY GOD. That is a lot of money."

"Yeah pocket change for Windem. For you, you would never go hungry again and afford to build for your mom and dad a whole plantation."

"Yeah."

"Well what are you waiting for, get a pen and sign this puppy."

[Bobby grabs the rest of the papers and takes off running down the hall toward his bedroom. He flings open the door and jumps inside frantically looking for a pen. After some looking Bobby manages to find one and signs his name on the dotted line smiling gleefully with his eyes fixed totally on the signing of that contract. Bobby grabs the self-addressed stamped envelope and encloses the contract in the letter sealing it up immediately and closes it.]

"I've got gold fevor. Everything has prepared me for this moment. All of the years in wrestling school, bouncing from high school to high school, taking booking after booking and working for peanuts. It all pays off. I'm getting my break, and its all thanks to you Freddie. I'm going to fullfill my dream of becoming a professional wrestler. I will be able to set foot in the ring with such as greats as...

Troy Windham...
Kin Hiroshi...
Jay Phoenix...
JA...

Kevin Powers...
Dan Ryan...
Zell Hunter...
Lindsey Troy...

"A girl?" [Freddie interrupting Bobby.]

"Yes...a girl...THE GIRL. The single most successful female wrestler in all of sports entertainment. She's beautiful and yet so awesome. You'd thought that the girls in New Japan kicked ass. She could take'em all on without breaking a sweat."

"You sure about that?"

"Positive. Now can I finish what I was trying to say before you interupted me?"

"Sure."

"Thank you. I mean I have sown so much into this business and given so much already, and now I'm finally getting the chance to reap the harvest for my hard work. All of the times getting pounded to the mat during bump drills in wrestling school. All of the time spend driving from booking to booking and lucky if I got $100 for the night. Its all paying off."

[Bobby walks over to a large trophy shelf and picked up a framed picture of him standing next to his fellow Rome, Georgia local hero and hometown idol Arn Anderson posing together.]

"I knew that I could make it. I knew that I was gonna make you and all of Rome proud of me. Just like I've been proud of you. When you see me on CSWA television. I hope you smile. And I thought working with you was like a dream come true. Now I have new dream. I have a new destiny. Win or lose, this will be the single great night...

"Tournament." [Chimes in Freddie.]

"Tournament of my entire life. Freddie, after this Gold Rush Tournament is over, nobody will forget the name 'What Goes Around Comes Around' Bobby Karma....

"And don't forget his manager, and man who made it all possible for him, 'Light As A Feather' Freddie Meriweather." [Freddie chiming in again once again.]

"I was getting to that?"

"Sure you were Bobby, but I won't hold it against you. Your thanks is enough. I did my part as a manager, now its time for you to do your part as a wrestler."

"Fate is a funny thing and I am the man who will embrace his true calling. CSWA, you better look out because the KARMA POLICEMAN is coming....

"Karma policeman? You've gotta be kidding me, I don't think Radiohead will like you stealin their song title."

"Hey I'm workin here. I'm trying to find my catchphrase...its working in progress."

"Yeah well I think that everybody would agree with me that we need to keep working on it."

"I'm trying."

"I know you are, and I'll help you...alot."

"Anyway, lets pack our bags and leave. We have a certain annual tournament to go to, and I've got gold fever Freddie."

"Now that's more like it."

[Bobby goes into his closet and pulls off a black rolling travel case from the top of the shelf
and sets it on the bed as he begins packing clothes into the case. He looks over at Freddie who has helped him in packing.]

"Freddie, thanks man."

"That's what I'm here for, now enough talk we have an appointment with destiny and we don't want to be late."

[The scene slowly fades out.]

 

[DizzaHizza]

** Kin Hiroshi flips through a book entitled "How To Be Like Troy Windham". He sets the book down, slings the CSWA US Championship belt over his shoulder, and gives a nod, as if to say, "Okay...this is how Troy does it, right?" Hiroshi looks into the camera. **

KIN HIROSHI: "My God, just when I thought I'd never meet anyone more long winded than JA, along comes "My Name Is Earl" Bobby Karma, and "Light As A Feather, Stiff As A Board" Freddie Meriweather.

"I mean, come on, Freddie, I saw more charisma out of a donkey last weekend during the 'Clerks II' opening than out of you. How do you expect to manage the Karma Chameleon when it seems like you got a stick up your ass (NOT a donkey reference)?

"Thankfully, you've recognized the greatness of The Muffin Man, and realize that when it comes to CSWA, I'm the second greatest wrestler around. Not because I choose to be, but because Troy Windham won't let me be #1.

"Then again, why should I try to be #1 with him around? That's like Brad Pitt trying to be 'Danny Ocean' while George Clooney is still reprising Frank Sinatra's role. I'm not trying to take 'Mr. Clooney' down, I'm just trying to get my face into the camera while I can, when I can.

"Welcome to the REAL world of wrestling, Karma."

** FADE TO BLACK **

 

[Hell_Fighter]

"Roadtrip conversations."

::Fade In...

Location: Somewhere on the road...
Time: Now...
Setting: Inside Bobby Karma's care driving...

[The scene opens somwhere along the Georgia highways traveling north in the direction of CS Enterprises.]

[Cut to: The interior of a of a really old 1970 light blue Pontiac GTO. On the outside, rust and decay is starting to take over and dominate the light blue paint, however, it still runs well and holding its own on the highway. In the interior, the seats have seen better days, but they are properly disguised with old southern made quilts wrapped around the seats. Inside we see CSWA bound or bust hopefuls, "What Goes Around Comes Around" Bobby Karma, and his manager "Light As A Feather" Freddie Meriweather driving down the highway listening to the radio and singing along. Bobby is driving and Freddie is in the passenger seat next to him.]

Song playing on the radio: "Birdhouse In Your Soul" by They Might Be Giants

Im your only friend
Im not your only friend
But Im a little glowing friend
But really Im not actually your friend
But I am

[Okay, so I never said that they very good singers. But come on, they're wrestlers and sports entertainers. If they were singers then they wouldn't be on their way to CS Enterprises would they? They'd be on their way to somewhere like Nashville or wherever singers go to make music and get rich and have sex with jailbait groupies.]

Blue canary in the outlet by the light switch
Who watches over you
Make a little birdhouse in your soul
Not to put too fine a point on it
Say Im the only bee in your bonnet
Make a little birdhouse in your soul


[Freddie turns down the radio a little bit so that you can kind of hear it playing but not over their talking while driving.]

Bobby Karma: I've got the gold fever. You know Freddie, this is all because of you. Had you not sent in that application and that tape. I would still be wrestling in high schools and warehouses for peanuts. You made this all possible man.

Freddie Meriweather: I know what was going on Bobby. You became complacent and was content with where you were at. Nothing wrong with that except for one thing.

Bobby: What's that?

Freddie: Your way better than that. You have a great opportunity to not only achieve your dream, your destiny, but who knows you could actually end up winning either the Greensburo, the Presidental, the United States championship, or dare I say it you could actually beat Troy Windham and become the new CSWA Unifed World Champion. You...Bobby Karma, a mere nobody compared to their eyes. According to people like Dan Ryan, Lindsey Troy, and even Windhem, you are, but that could all change in single night...or at least in this case a single tournament. For someone like Windham, its just another win or blog on their webpage, but for you...this is your destiny. When I sent in your application and tape, I knew without a doubt that you would get in, but then to have Chad Merritt persoanlly invite you to take part in this tournament just confirms everything. You would of been content with just walking CSWA television, climbing in the ring, wrestle someone like Dan Ryan, he'd probably beat you to a pulp. You collect your paycheck and come back to Rome. But this is much better than anything I could of ever thought of. Your destiny, your fate, your karma was to make it to the big leagues, not be put in a position where you could win it all. I never saw this coming.

Bobby: I know what you mean Freddie. I've always believed in reapin what you sow. My daddy spoke that right into me being a preacher and all. I may not of PKs that was destined to follow in my daddy's footsteps. Not that I'm taking away from that, but I was destined to be something more. I was destined to be a wrestler and to fight on the big stage. That's what I'm gonna do. I gonna fight where the entire world will see me. Its a lot to take in to say the least. So is all this Karma?

Freddie: Well Karma means action, and you are a man of "action." It is cause and effect. Now I've none you Bobby for how long?

Bobby: Since we were grasshopper growing up.

Freddie: Right, and I've always known you to be a good kid and now good guy. You do what your told. You don't break laws or be mean to people. You always try to be the best person that you can be. You worked hard in school and on the wrestling circuit. Example, take that feud you worked with Arn. Granted it was a non wrestling feud, and he didn't have to come back to Rome and take the time working with you, but he saw something in you. He helped orchastrate a nice program that would help you get over and noticed. Otherwise you would of been just another "nice guy finishing last" sort of thing. The opportunity came to you and it was the catylyst for bigger things. Had you not worked that program with Arn, you would of never gotten this invitation to fight in the Gold Rush Tournament. Like I said, its all cause and effect. When you do good, good things will come. When you do bad things, bad things will come. Bobby, you're a good guy and you will reap the benefit to all of your hard work.

Bobby: You know feuding with my all-time idol was the hardest thing that I ever could of done. I mean I had to turn on my hero that I've looked up to since I was a kid. My real regret was that I never had the chance to wrestle him and really show him how much of an impact he had on my life.

Freddie: Trust me, I'm sure he knows. But you played a role. The role of a badguy, but just a role nonetheless. In real life your a nice guy Bobby, and that's what really matters and shows in the end. Now when set foot in CS Enterprises and meet all of those big time players like Windham and Dan Ryan, and from what I've read or heard about them, they are jerks. If it is true that their jerks and all, you can't get mad or offended. Just turn the other cheek and walk away. If you have an issue with them, as fate orchastrates it, settle it into the ring. Don't go to them, let them come to you. In the end they will get what's coming to them in due time.

Bobby: So do I need a catchphrase or some neat little gimmick that's memorable?

Freddie: I don't think so. At first yeah I thought that maybe you needed one. Or you need to memorize a catchphrase or two to spout off, but no after having this talk with you Bobby. I honestly believe that you don't need that. You are entertaining and of course your a great wrestler. I mean for crying out loud, Arn Anderson taught you the secret to his spinebuster, and nobody since him has ever aced it. They think that the spinebuster is all about power, and its not. Nobody can nail a Double-A spinebuster because one little thing. You deliver the single prettiest spinebuster that is both graceful and yet painful at the same time. Only AA could do that, and now you.

Bobby: Yeah, he could only tell me verbally and not show me like he used to.

Freddie: What do you expect when your hurt like he is, but hey he told you the secret and you got it on the first try, that says something, and you keep better with it.

Bobby: Yeah that was a great feeling, but I would like to be remembered for more than just someone who could deliver a great AA style spinebuster.

Freddie: And you will.

Bobby: You're right, I will. I'm young and I'm just starting. People like Windham, Ryan, and even Lindsey Troy, how have been in this business for a long time may be nearing the end of their career. They may not even admit it to themselves. They may still have more than enough juice in their bodies to carry them on for another 10 years or so, but I like to think that I represent the future. I mean I'm like 21 years old. How old is Dan Ryan? I don't want to sound cocky, but people like him are coming to an end. Plus its not like he needs to win this Gold Rush Tournament. He's held more championship gold than anybody. He's already moving toward legend status. I'm hungry and I desire to have my dreams fullfilled. First dream was getting to the center stage, the big leagues. Now that I am here, now I have a new goal. Winning something...anything. I don't care if I beat The Brooklyn Brawler or if I beat Troy Windham, but I will defeat somebody because deep down I know I can.

Freddie: So what title do you think that you can get first? Do you really think that take Windham's title?

Bobby: You know, I'll take whatever title comes my way. If it just so happens that its the Unified World Title, then so be it. I will fight to win. He may beat me, but he will at least remember and respect me when its all said and done. But if United States Championship comes my way. Just good, I'll fight and if I can I'll take away from who is that has title right now.

Freddie: Oh Kin Hiroshi.

Bobby: Yeah, I'll fight him the same way I would Windham. If that match just happens to be a curtain jerker matches where I star the whole show out. That's okay, it'll be the best damn curtain jerker match that anybody's ever seen.

Freddie: And the best part is...

Bobby: The thought that I could and would beat Kin Hiroshi in the center of the ring. Just remember, anything can happen.

Freddie: What goes around comes around?

Bobby: Yeah, but that's not Karma...that's BOBBY KARMA.

Freddie: Bobby?

Bobby: My new catchephrase, you like it?

Freddie: Yeah, actually I do, pretty catchy dude.

Bobby: Its coming along.

[Bobby looks down and sees that the car is nearing the "E" on the dashboard.]

Bobby: Hey running low on some gas, need to pull in for a pitstop. You hungry?

Freddie: Yeah man, I am.

Bobby: Hey look, who'd thunk it, there's a gas station/rest stop 1 mile from here.

Freddie: You buying?

Bobby: Sure, its on me.

Freddie: Kewl, I like free food.

[The car drives passed the sign that indicates the gas station and resteraunt one mile up the road to take care of their road trip needs. The scene slowly fades out.]

 

[DizzaHizza]

Re: "Roadtrip conversations."

Freddie: So what title do you think that you can get first? Do you really think that take Windham's title?

Bobby: You know, I'll take whatever title comes my way. If it just so happens that its the Unified World Title, then so be it. I will fight to win. He may beat me, but he will at least remember and respect me when its all said and done. But if United States Championship comes my way. Just good, I'll fight and if I can I'll take away from who is that has title right now.

Freddie: Oh Kin Hiroshi.

Bobby: Yeah, I'll fight him the same way I would Windham. If that match just happens to be a curtain jerker matches where I star the whole show out. That's okay, it'll be the best damn curtain jerker match that anybody's ever seen.

Freddie: And the best part is...

Bobby: The thought that I could and would beat Kin Hiroshi in the center of the ring. Just remember, anything can happen.

Freddie: What goes around comes around?

Bobby: Yeah, but that's not Karma...that's BOBBY KARMA.

KIN HIROSHI: "Careful, Bobby, you're starting to walk into territory you aren't familiar with, particular the Ass-Stomped Swamp and the Pinfall Forest.

"You wanna say that I am...no, the CSWA United States Championship is a 'curtain jerker'? What makes you think that you're so high and mighty that you can start running your mouth like you belong here?

"You don't.

"Your story is the same as Joe Smith who was banging Julie Cheerleader before making it his dream to wrestle with the greats in the See-Ess-Dubya. Except, you were slamming salami with ole' Meriwether while you told everyone you were teaching each other to 'wrestle'. Don't worry, kid, my dad told me the same thing when I walked in on him and my mom when I was six.

"You're played out and boring. Hell, you don't even have a catchphrase that works.

"Do you know the Muffin Man?

"See, THAT WORKS because I made a fortune selling muffins, and I got the moniker the Muffin Man, and I was a mid-carder for so long that no one knew, or cared, who I was. Now, though, I'm 50 feet from Pacific Ocean, and can see Troy "Lewis & Clark" Windham right in front of me.

"You? You're stuck in St. Louis amazed that you got an invite to CSWA with all of the rest of the job-squad.

"You want me to be concerned about losing the title because of karma, Bobby...Karma? Then, how about you quit running your mouth about affairs that you have no f**king part in, before someone comes along and shoves one of your untalented left feet into your mouth and permanently shuts you up?

"Now THAT would be some karma that I'd pay for."

 

[Hell_Fighter]

"Pitstop and meeting our first critic."

::Fade In...

Location: Somewhere just outside of Georgia...
Time: Now...
Setting: Inside some highway mom and pop owned gas station/sports bar resteraunt

[The scene opens inside of the resteraunt. Freddie Meriweather is seen sitting down one one of the window booths in the dining area. He has just given his and Bobby's orders to the waitress. He drums his fingers on the table waiting for his food. The door opens as Bobby comes in. He sees Freddie sitting down at the table. He walks over and sits down.]

Bobby: Car's gased up and ready to go, you order the food?

Freddie: It should be here in about 15 or 20 minutes.

Bobby: Cool...

[Bobby glances passed Freddie and sees on television suspended on a stand above the bar. He tries to listen to the broadcast as it appears to be an airing of CSWA United States Champion, Kin Hiroshi's latest promo, and interesting to note that it is directed on Karma and Meriweather.]

Bobby: [Polities hollars at the bartender to get his attention.] Hey Bartender, could you turn that UP for a minute.

[At Bobby's request, the bartender does as he instructs and turns up the Kin Hiroshi promo so that they can hear it. Bobby and Meriweather watch intently as they listen to who could be they very first rival in the CSWA.]

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** Kin Hiroshi flips through a book entitled "How To Be Like Troy Windham". He sets the book down, slings the CSWA US Championship belt over his shoulder, and gives a nod, as if to say, "Okay...this is how Troy does it, right?" Hiroshi looks into the camera. **


KIN HIROSHI: "My God, just when I thought I'd never meet anyone more long winded than JA, along comes "My Name Is Earl" Bobby Karma, and "Light As A Feather, Stiff As A Board" Freddie Meriweather.

"I mean, come on, Freddie, I saw more charisma out of a donkey last weekend during the 'Clerks II' opening than out of you. How do you expect to manage the Karma Chameleon when it seems like you got a stick up your ass (NOT a donkey reference)?

"Thankfully, you've recognized the greatness of The Muffin Man, and realize that when it comes to CSWA, I'm the second greatest wrestler around. Not because I choose to be, but because Troy Windham won't let me be #1.

"Then again, why should I try to be #1 with him around? That's like Brad Pitt trying to be 'Danny Ocean' while George Clooney is still reprising Frank Sinatra's role. I'm not trying to take 'Mr. Clooney' down, I'm just trying to get my face into the camera while I can, when I can.

"Welcome to the REAL world of wrestling, Karma."

** FADE TO BLACK **

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[At the conclusion of the promo, Bobby gets the bartender's attention again.]

Bobby: Ah, thank you sir, you can turn it back down now.

[Bobby sits back down as he looks at his friend Freddie Meriweather who is a little dumbfounded by what he just heard as it appears that Freddie was more of the focus than Bobby was, and Bobby is the wrestler of the two. Freddie looks up at Bobby with a quizing look on his face.]

Freddie: Who's Earl?

[At first Bobby is perplexed as to not know the question, but then the answer comes to him.]

Bobby: Oh that's that show on NBC on I think Friday nights. That show "My Name Is Ear". You know has that guy from those Kevin Smith movies in it. Jason Lee, yeah that's his name.

Freddie: Ah Bobby?

Bobby: Yeah Freddie?

Freddie: Is that one of those shameless promotional plugs?

Bobby: Why Freddie, I do believe they are.

Freddie: Ah okay...cool. Bobby?

Bobby: Yeah Freddie?

Freddie: Am I acting like that one guy on that show? You know, Earl's sidekick Randy?

Bobby: A little bit, I think its noticable. A little rough around the edges for a first time but I got it. Good job.

Freddie: Ah...okay...cool. Stick up my ass my.........[he pauses as he realizes what he is about to say. He rethinks what he needs to say before finishing his sentence.]....ass.

Bobby: That's a little on the redundant side.

Freddie: Sorry Bobby, lost my head.

Bobby: Hey its cool Freddie. We're both learning here. We've never been in the big leagues before, and must be doing something right if we've managed to get the attention of the CSWA's very own United States Champion.

Freddie: Yeah.

Bobby: But what about 'Stiff as a Board?'

Freddie: Yeah...that don't rhyme. Its 'Light As A Feather' Freddie Meriweather. Kin Hiroshi needs to recognize the rhyme scheme. If he's such a great wrestler and great champion, then why can't he do one little thing.

Bobby: Lets not hate on him. What good will come of that? Afterall, he's the champion and he's earned the right to talk a little trash especially on the two of us.

Freddie: Good point. But what I wanna know is for a man that is so great as he claim to be. Why is he only second best?

Bobby: Well he did say that Troy Windham won't let him THE BEST.

Freddie: That's not very nice. The more that I hear of this Troy Windham, the more I really dislike him. Also he was reading a book written by Troy Windham on what was it?

Bobby: I think it was something like "How To Be Like Troy Windham".

Freddie: Why would someone like Kin Hiroshi want to be like Troy Windham? Shouldn't he be like Kin Hiroshi rather than just an immitation of Windham?

Bobby: Maybe its like part of his gimmick or persona. You know maybe he immitates people like Windham. Immitation is the highest form of flattery.

Freddie: So what do you call duplication?

Bobby: Oh that's for when I make it big and I become so big that I will be so one of a kind that I will never ever be duplicated, but instead people will attempt to immitate me...and do it very very poorly.

Freddie: Oh okay, gotchya...did you just think of that?

Bobby: Yeah I did, did you like it?

Freddie: Yeah I did.

Bobby: It just came to me just now.

Freddie: Really, you didn't rehearse that in front of the rear view mirror before you came in?

Bobby: Nope, just came to me.

Freddie: Gotchya, it works.

Bobby: I'm glad you like it, I just hope someone like Jiroshi likes it.

Freddie: Hiroshi.

Bobby: Yeah I know, that's what I said.

Freddie: No you said Jiroshi with an "J".

Bobby: Oh...my bad. Oh well. I don't think Karma will count that against me too much will it.

Freddie: So should we recognize the greatness of 'The Muffin Man'?

Bobby: He has the CSWA United States title in his possession so yeah I think that we should acknowledge it and respect him as the champion...for the time being.

Freddie: For the time being?

Bobby: Until he loses it.

Freddie: Then what?

Bobby: Then he's just like us...just another wrestler trying to get to the top of the ladder.

Freddie: Right, and on that note, lets eat because here comes our food.

[The waitress brings over their order of food on a tray and sets the plates down in front of them.]

Bobby: Looks great, thank you.

Freddie: Yes thank you.

[She leaves. They prepare to eat their meal.]

Freddie: Hey Bobby?

Bobby: What?

Freddie: Why does Kin Hiroshi call himself the muffin man?

Bobby: I don't know, because makes muffins.

Freddie: Are they any good?

Bobby: I don't know. Stop asking Randy questions and eat your dinner.

Freddie: Okay. All this talk about muffins are making me hungry for some muffins. You think those muffins at the counter were made by The Muffin Man Kin Hiroshi?

Bobby: I don't know, be quiet and eat your dinner.

Freddie: Okay.

[Long pause and then Freddie chimes in.]

Freddie: Bobby, I'm gonna go get a muffin.

Bobby: Okay go.

[Freddie gets up and walks over to the counter to get a muffin. The scene slowly fades out to an end.]

 

[DizzaHizza]

** Kin Hiroshi slowly shakes his head and sighs. **

KIN HIROSHI: "Sometimes, it's SOOO hard being so brilliant. I mean, I make witty comments and it's lost on Tweedledumb and Tweedledumber.

"So, listen up you Ozark traveling c**t stains, because I'm only going to explain the nuances of my genius once."

** Hiroshi inhales deeply. **

KIN HIROSHI: "I used the nickname 'My Name Is Earl' for Bobby Karma, not because you look, represent or otherwise ARE Jason Lee's portrayed character Earl. Nor did I call you this name because of your bumbling and stumbling sidekick. I used this name because the show seems to be a modern-television comedic-phenomenom that revolves around the simple concept of Karma. This said concept is now being ripped off by every Tom, Dick and Harry to make money and scam unassuming grandmas and pre-teens into believing anything, such as, 'Bobby Karma is destined for greatness' or 'Lance Bass is straight no matter what he says.' The irony in my comments stems from the fact that your name, is in fact, Karma. Be that as it may, you have fallen into the pitfall of any true performer: repeating that which is already being repeated a million times over."

** Hiroshi gasps for a breath. **

KIN HIROSHI: "As for the coments about me paying any sort of mind to you, well, don't flatter yourself, I'm just watching my back like any champion should. You aren't a bug up my ass, or a monkey on my back.

"However, you both, Bobby and Freddie, seem to think that if I lose the United States Championship, that I'll be climbing the ladder to the top again?

"Do you hear yourselves?

"Kin Hiroshi isn't going to climb a ladder, scale a cage, or ride an elephant to the top. Kids, Kin Hiroshi is a main-eventer. You, are what we, in the business, call 'jobbers'. Then again, you might be mid-carders, but the fact remains that you'll always be below me, no matter what you think, say or do.

"And please, keep calling me 'Jiroshi'. It really makes me happy to know that you can't even pronounce a simple Japanese name, you ignorant, racist, bastards.

"When you get an orignal schict, look me up, I'll be in Greensboro making sure the rest of the riff-raff invading CSWA isn't after my belt."

 

[Hell_Fighter]

"And now for dessert, a side of trash talking."

::Fade In...

Location: Somewhere just outside of Georgia...
Time: After dinner.
Setting: Just outside in the parking lot of some highway mom and pop owned gas station/sports bar resteraunt...


[The scene opens as we see Bobby Karma and Freddie Meriweather. They have just finished their dinner and have paid their tab. They walk out of the resteraunt and walk toward their car where two truck drivers are standing around their talking amoungst themselves drinking a large fountain soda from the gas station portion of the rest stop, and chewin on some tabacco in their mouths. Bobby and Freddie approach them as they try to get back to their car.]

Bobby: Hey guys, that's my car, can I get by so I can to it?

Truck driver 1: Oh right, here you go. [Spits]

[They move over so that Bobby and Freddie can get to it. Suddenly one of them chimes in.]

Truck Driver 2: Aren't you that new CSWA kid? [Spits]

Truck Driver 1: Yeah, I think its..."What Goes Around Comes Around" Bobby Karma. I've seen wrestle at one of the Georgia Bingo halls. Your good kid, and now he's gotten the invite to compete with the really big boys as a member of the CSWA in that Gold Rush Tournament.

Bobby: Thank man. I'll try not to let you down do everybody proud.

TD 2: Man you hear, he's just started and already he's gotten the attention of Hiroshi? [Spits]

TD 1: He did. [Spits]

TD 2: And from what I've been hearing he is not happy with you Karma. Yeah Karma's started a little trash talk war with Hiroshi and he is not letting it slide. [Spits]

Bobby: I what?

TD1: Oh yeah...word says that you called Hiroshi a curtain jerker. [Spits]

Bobby: I never said anything like that.

Freddie: Ahhhhh

Bobby: What?

Freddie: Yeah you did, don't you remember we were talking in the car and you said something along those lines.

Bobby: [Remembering when and what he may of said.] Alright maybe I said it, but not in a negative. How come is it that in this business people think that wrestling in the opening match or quote "curtain jerking" unquote is an insult. I don't think of it as an insult. I consider it a privilage and an honor to fight as the first match of the card. All I said was that I would never treat being like the opening match was an upset or punishment. I mean I am setting the entire tone for the show. All I'm saying is that hypothetically speaking...

TD 1: Oh big word. [Spits]

Bobby: Anyway, I'm just saying that I would thrive on being the best match on the entire card whether or not was I the first match, middle match, or last match of the night. I would do the very best that I could and of course the thought that I could upset Kin Hiroshi and take his United States title away from him.

TD 2: Man, he did it again. He talkin the trash. Hiroshi not gonna be happy. [Spits]

Freddie: What else did Hiroshi say about Bobby?

TD 1: Oh he said some gay insults about you and your little friend. [Spits]

Bobby: Oh my god, he doesn't me, or us for that matter. Who does this guy think he he is.

TD 2: He's the CSWA United States Champion. [Spits.]

Bobby: Seriously, this is rediculous. I just wanna wrestle and God willing win whether its a match or even a title. I just want to wrestle. These guy has major issues. He must of...I don't know...walked in on his mom and dad when he was six years old or something.

TD 1: How'd you know, did you watch that promo too? [Spits]

Bobby: No I just guessed, based off of what I've heard and see about him, he seems like that type of guy, right?

TD 2: There he goes again, talkin the trash on Hiroshi. [Spit]

TD 1: Keep it up southern baby. [Spit]

Freddie: Let me ask you guys something, why does Kin Hiroshi call himself the muffin man.

TD 2: Because he used to sell muffins. [Spit]

TD 1: Before he became a wrestler. [Spit]

Bobby: And this guy's the CSWA United States Champion.

Freddie: I guess you gotta start somewhere.

Bobby: I guess so, come on Freddie, lets get out of here. Thank guys, have a good one.

TD 2: Okay, good luck in CSWA, and good luck against Hiroshi, you're gonna need it. [Spit]

[Bobby and Freddie get back into their car, but then Freddie pokes his head of the car window.]

Freddie: He doesn't need luck. Its all about Karma, Bobby Karma. Anyway bye guys.

[The car starts up as Bobby drives off leaving the two truck drivers with their wad of tabacco in their mouth.]

TD 1: Good kid, but Hiroshi's gonna grind his ass into dogmeat. [Spit]

TD 2: Hey anything can happen, I'll give the kid a chance and betchya he beats Hiroshi. [Spit]

TD 1: For the title?

TD 2: Maybe not right now, but when he comes back later, I think he will. [Spit]

TD 1: Only time will tell for sure.

[The scene fades out to an end.]

 

[Hell_Fighter]

"Bobby Karma 1 on 1 heart to heart talk"

::Fade In...

Location: On the highway en route to CS Enterprises headquarters in Greensburo...
Time: Night time...
Setting: Inside Bobby Karma's 1970 GTO...

[The scene opens inside Bobby's car. Its night time, but Bobby tries to drive for as long as possible until he gets too tired and has to pull over. Freddie is already sleeping in the passenger seat. In attempt to help keep him awake and not wake up his manager. Bobby turns on the radio and channels surfs around until he finds something that will help keep him awake. Suddenly he stops on a radio station that is playing a syndicated talk radio show. Interesting to note is that it is a radio show on pro wrestling. He leaves it on as the show comes back on the air.]

Radio DJ: And we're back, and I've got some CSWA news for all of your Greensburo fans. Now as you know, the annual Goldrush Tournament is fast approaching and already things are more heating up. We've seen a lot of faces both members of the CSWA, and even some new faces. I'm still expecting "HellFighter" Michael Shutt to come out of retirement and throw his name in the hat. Maybe this could be a second chance for him.

I'm kidding folks. But lets talk See Ess Dubbya A shop for a little bit. One of the things that has really caught my interests is this little trash talk war that Kin Hiroshi has gotten himself into with this new guy, what's his name again...Oh okay..."What Goes Around Comes Around" Bobby Karma. Okay whatever you say Bobby Kay. If you ask me, I think that this kid is way in over his head. He's in the big leagues and already he is slinging the perverbal trash at anybody and already some of it has landed on the United States Champion. Let me just say that Hiroshi is not pleased and can't wait to get his hands on this rookie. Hey Bobby...remember Karma, its your name.

In fact let me play something from you straight from Karma himself...

[He quesues up a recording of Karma and Meriweather earlier in the day.]

Bobby: I'm glad you like it, I just hope someone like Jiroshi likes it.

Freddie: Hiroshi.

Bobby: Yeah I know, that's what I said.

Freddie: No you said Jiroshi with an "J".

Bobby: Oh...my bad. Oh well. I don't think Karma will count that against me too much will it.



Bobby: Huh?

DJ: Now I don't know about you but I think that sounded racist, or at least very ignorant on the part of Mr. Karma. At least that's how Kin "I'm not Jiroshi" Hiroshi took it. Here listen to this and hear for yourself...

[He plays a recording from Kin's latest promo replying to Karma.]

"And please, keep calling me 'Jiroshi'. It really makes me happy to know that you can't even pronounce a simple Japanese name, you ignorant, racist, bastards.


Bobby: WHAT?

DJ: Oh trust me there is more to that interview, but keep the uproar to a minimum I think that it is best that I stop right there. My advice to the young Bobby Karma is this. Listen to your namesake son. Stop while your ahead. You've put your foot in your mouth and its getting you into trouble. I think that the CSWA brought you here for a reason but if your gonna start using racial insults and causing trouble, your time here is not going to last. I don't know you, but you must be good if Merritt gave you the invite to come and compete in the Gold Rush tournament. But don't start something that you won't finish. That's my big of advice for you son.

Anyway, and onto other news tonight.

[Bobby turns off the radio.]

"Kin...Kin Hiroshi. I admit, I was foolish. But I assure you that I am not a racist. I am not here to cause trouble. I just here to wrestle and win in the sport that I have so longed to be apart of. What I said was nothing more than a foolish slip of the tongue. Nothing more. Just because I'm born and raised from the south, and I take pride for that. Doesn't make me a racist. I'm many things but a racist is something I'm not. Now I am man enough to admit that I was wrong and I apologize for my ignorant blunder. However, I am not going to apologize for having a desire to win and prove to the entire world that I am more than just some flash in the pan. I can and I will be the future of this business. You call me a jobber? I know that term. Just because this is my first time called to the big dance doesn't mean that I'm stupid. I know that term and let me just say a jobber I am not. I know how to win. I am student of the game and my mission...no I take that back, my destiny is to win. I don't care if I win one match, the Greensburo title, your Unitied States Title, or even the Unified World Title. I'm a winner and I'm going to win. Be threatened if you want Kin Hiroshi. I don't care. But I will go out and perform each and every single match as if I was in the main event. I will make the most everything that I do."

"And if I happen to lose a match or job as you so put it. That's fine. I'll learn from my mistakes and move onto the next match. Yeah you might beat me the first time, but you won't beat me a second time. You think that I'm playing a gimmick...maybe I am. I like to think that I'm more than just a gimmick. I human being. I'm an athlete. I'm a real person who wants to win, and if I can win at all cost. Like I said, I'm a winner, and I'm going to win."

Freddie: [Starting to wake up.] Hey Bobby, need me to take over?

Bobby: Nah, I got it for a little bit longer. Go back to sleep. I'll let you know.

Freddie: *Yawn* Okay. [He goes back to sleep.]

[Bobby continues on with what he was saying.]

"Listen Kin, I'm NOT trying to start a trash talk war even though you've turned it into that by taking my words and twisting them around. I'm just trying to fullfill me destiny and do the best that I can to win and make my family proud. I'm sure you really are a great athlete, and I do look forward to the day we step into the ring and face each other, but until them then. I'm in no hurry. I control my future. I control my destiny. The choices I make here today will dictate the course of my stay in the CSWA, and with that it will decide whether or not I am just a jobber or if I am the future of the CSWA and possibly the next Unified World Champion. That's what karma is all about...that's what I'm ALL about."

"Here's the way I see it Kin...I can call you Kin right? Or for now I'll just call you Hiroshi...See just now I learned from my mistakes...You are the CSWA United States Champion. Which means you've raised the bar. You are the pinnacle of this business. I'm sure you are the main event. That's fine and I acknowledge that. You even seem like the type of person who doesn't even need a title around your waist or resting on your shoulder in order to be entertaining. The title doesn't make you, you make the title. I see this, and it is for that I want to beat you now more than anything because of you are. Not because your the Unitied States Champion, but because your the main event. Your more popular and athletic than the guy carrying this company and it is for this that I wanna beat you even more....

Thank you Kin Hiroshi, you've just given me a new destiny. Beating you, and I don't even want your US Title, taking it would be a nice added bonus. And on that note, now I have the right to say it as you have heard my heart speak and not just some twisted trash...

Its not just karma...that's BOBBY KARMA."

[The scene slowly fades out to an end.]