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Entertainment v Jenro


New member
Nov 16, 2003
Nottingham, England
[FADE IN. Mr Entertainment is sitting alone in a bar, a drink in hand, and several bottles on the table. In the background, you can just about make out a couple of wrestling posters – one is advertising New ERA’s first PPV, whilst the second is advertising some kind of tournament. Mr Entertainment is wearing a zipped up leather jacket, and his hair is, as always, tied back]

ME: I’m past it. Cannae hack it. Tha’s what some folks’ve been spouting ‘bout my time in NEW so far. Sure, I’ve only got one win outta three, but wins an’ losses ain’t all important when a companies going bust. And thanks to me, the boys in the back still have jobs.

Soundin’ obnoxious and arrogant? Look fer yerself. The viewing figures are on the up an’ up, and they peak when I’m on the screen. So, I’m gonna go out an’ get myself more air-time. You wanna know how? By bein’ the longest reigning TV champ this company’s seen.

What? I don’ have a title match? Well, once again, we ain’t got a TV champ. Last I checked, MWG and Payne pinned each other, didn’ they? Sure, one of ‘em has a…belt, but neither of ‘em are gonna make the people wanna see that title defended week in an’ week out. They don’t have IT. The spark, the glitz, the glamour. MWG may be able to out-weird just about anybody this side of sane, but the freak scares people into changin’ the damn channel when he comes out. It’s a damn good thing I was on the screen last RAUCOUS, because Tom’s payment cheques wouldn’a been the only ones bouncing.

[He takes a swig of his drink, before rolling his head round to audibly crack his neck]

ME: But first… before I can get a holda that title, I know I gotta prove myself ta management. And ta do that, looks like I gotta go through a guy by the name…well, I don’t even think it’s a damn name. Sounds more like a disease MWG mighta picked up. I mean, come on… Jenro Electrovolt? Leavin ya name fer one minute, I pulled some info on ya from the NEW site, and I must say I ain’t impressed. I showed a test-audience a few tapes of ya, and how long you think it took before they all fell asleep?

About as long as it’s gonna take fer me ta beat yer ass at RAPTURE.

And then, it’s onwards and upwards, towards bigger things. Not better, ‘cause there ain’t no better entertainer in this industry. But you all know that already.

And I don’t even need a gold dildo ta get peoples attention.


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