File v HAL

[TheOriginalSE]

All RP for the match between PETER FILE and HAL at RAUCOUS should be done in this folder. Any RP posted outside of the folder will not count.

* Alex Wylde will be the special guest referee.


The RP deadline is 11:59pm PST on SUNDAY, January 10, 2010. Angles should be sent to wfwnewrestling@gmail.com ..

There will be NO RP EXTENSIONS for this show.

 

[JLevinson]

(FADEIN to an empty basement we’ve seen before. None other than Harold A. Lumbourgh sits on an old couch, reading an older Spider-Man comic book. He’s wearing sweatpants and a Dragon Age: Origins t-shirt.)

HAL: “Sometimes, in technology’s progress towards the future, there are… bumps in the road. Kinks to be ironed out.

“Look at Windows Vista. In the beginning, poor drive support and a reliance on a graphic card-hogging Aeros theme that didn’t support mainstream RAM numbers doomed it to failure. Yet the operating system itself, run on the proper hardware, was a clearly superior system.

“So life is, as technology. A bump in the road in Shawn Hart. I wil not make excuses for my performance. I can only learn from my mistakes, and correct my flaws. I’ll be surely to properly document any bugs and work tirelessly to remove them.

“Peter File… how quaint. You know, Peter.. I’ve been on 4chan. I’ve… spoken… to your kind.

“That doesn’t mean I have to care, Mr. File. You are, of course, a disgrace to… any sense of taste or consideration for one’s senses.

“I’m sure you imagine yourself as quite shocking and edgy… though for those of us who have been on the Internet, I can only say, hey.. 2 girls 1 up you are not. And let’s keep it that way.

“You, my friend, have the unfortunate problem of being my first opponent after my unsuccessful bid for the World Title. And it’s not a good place to be. Because I have some kinks to work out. Some bugs to fix. And it’s not going to be pleasant for you.

“I am always evolving. Always changing. Always becoming better. And next time, Shawn Hart won’t be so lucky. And you, Peter… you worthless pederast… I will give you only one ounce of what you deserve in that ring.

“You won’t be able to beat this version of HAL… because you couldn’t beat the old version of HAL… because, honestly, let’s face it… I’m a lot bigger than what you’re used to dealing with… and the only place you belong is on To Catch a Predator, so Peter…

“Take a seat, would you?”

(FADEOUT as he finally peers up and smirks at the camera.)

 

[JLevinson]

(FADEIN to what appear to be the empty WFW:NE offices sometime at night. Various promotional signs and logos are all over the walls. Harold A. Lubmourgh is messing with one of the computers in a cubicle.)

HAL: “Y’know, whenever we do these late night updates, there’s always a few stragglers. Some guy in Accounting with the latest worm. Sometimes it’s the VP and a random BSOD.

“The time and effort into such an upgrade is almost unimaginable. The kind of man who would endure such a thing for a slightly more efficient version of an already working program… well, that’s not the kind of man to be trifled with.

“You, Peter File, are no such kind of man. No, Peter… you are like the 2 girls 1 cup of the wrestling world. Sure, it’s shocking, and it makes people talk, but is it really good[/b]? I mean, is anybody actually enjoying themselves?”

(He sighs and shakes his head at the computer, taking it down for a reboot. As it starts rebooting, he hits F8 for Safe Mode with Networking and crosses his fingers.)

HAL: “Me… I’m the future of WFW:NE. Even the announcers can’t stop saying it, and who could blame them? Such physical prowess and intellectual capacity is rare in a world full of bizarre sexual predators such as you.”

(He leans back and smiles as Windows finally boots up and he finishes the installation.)

HAL: “Sometimes, you just have to be patient. Did everything go according to plan against Shawn Hart? Of course not. Does not mean I will relent for even one moment against you, Peter File? No, no it does not.

“So begins the next upgrade of HAL 2.0. It will be painful, and certainly, it will not be a smooth and perfect operation.

“But it’s inevitable, like my rise to the top of WFW:NE. Prepare for the wave of the future, Peter. It’s coming, whether you like it or not.”

(FADEOUT.)